+THE
BIG GAY EXPLANATION ARTICLE+
Joss Whedon has always had
a tendency to ignore everything he's written in the past, and always start
each episode without feeling constrained by continuity. So often the show
tends to contradict itself; Whedon writes a story element in which doesn't
fit with past seasons, but is so good it has to stay. On the face of it,
the unexpected coming out of Willow was one such; it didn't have anything
to do with the first, second or third seasons of the show, and came as
a bit of a non-sequitur. But I think the idea of Willow being lesbian must
have been in the back of Joss Whedon's mind for a long time, because it
does fit in with the earlier seasons. This is a reading of Season
1, 2 and 3 which makes sense. It's not to say that this was the way the
show was written, but rather that's it the going back and tying up of loose
ends which Joss Whedon has spoken of.
In Season 1, Willow's love
life is dominated by Xander, or the lack of Xand. Ostensibly, this is a
simple one-way romance; Willow loves Xander, Xander loves Willow but not
in a sexual way. Looking back on it, in fact Willow is defined by wanting
to be seen as 'normal' and 'straight', as she's in High School and doesn't
want to stand out as different. Xander is the only man in her life who
she loves, so of all men she thinks he's the only one she could really
have a relationship with. It's also worth pointing out that Willow never
acknowledges her real sexuality, not even to herself - she is repression
girl. She doesn't feel drawn to any other men other than Xander because
she needs to love a man before she can think about sleeping with him. In
the whole season, Willow never seems attracted to men apart from Xander.
THE
PROSPECT OF NORMALITY
 In
Season 2 Willow's desire for a heterosexual relationship continues, but
she falls for Oz. It's clear she feels for Oz in much the same way as she
feels for Xander, and that she really does love him. Oz is older and more
experienced than Xander, and offers Willow the prospect of 'normality'.
Throughout their relationship, the stress is always on the fact that Willow
is now cooler, and more accepted, because she has a boyfriend in a band.
But Willow still isn't seen as a sexual character; her relationship with
Oz is almost completely chaste, with the emphasis on love rather than lust.
In the episode 'Bewitched, Bothered and Bewildered' (by Marti Noxon), Willow
displays her sexual side in trying to seduce Xander; but she's under a
spell, as are all the women in Sunnydale, presumably regardless of sexual
orientation. Willow is bewitched into lusting after Xander, rather than
just loving him.
Season 3 is characterized
by three big developments in the character of Willow; an illicit relationship
with Xander, the appearance of her evil doppleself, and losing her virginity.
With Oz, Willow manages to obtain a place as one of the fairly cool people,
and she's accepted as heterosexual. But being lesbian, she doesn't feel
sexually attracted to Oz. She longs to have sex, but more to cement her
place as 'straight' than through actual lust. But because she doesn't feel
a sexual attraction to Oz, she turns to Xander, who coincidentally is unsatisfied
with his relationship with Cordelia, albeit for very different reasons.
But in the end Willow and Xander are just friends.
In the episodes 'The Wish'
(by Marti Noxon) and 'Dopplegangland' (by Joss Whedon) 
we see what Willow would have been like as a vampire. And yes, she's gay,
or at least 'kinda gay'. In this alternate reality, her relationship with
Xander is much the same; while they seem to be together, Willow is drawn
to other people, namely Angel and her non-evil alternate self. With Angel,
Willow tortures him, perhaps inflicting revenge on men for their making
her life as a human so difficult. There isn't necessarily a sexual feeling.
In 'Dopplegangland', evil Willow is more obviously gay, what with the whole
licking and touching she does of non-evil Willow. The most telling line,
which might well have just been thrown in as an off-hand as joke, is when
Buffy reassures Willow that a vampire's personality has nothing to do with
the personality of the human they inhabit. 'Well, actually-' Angel cuts
in, before changing his mind. The obvious implication is that Willow is
'kinda gay' herself. Vampire Willow, not having the constraints of being
in High School and of trying to appear 'normal', feels free to do what
and who she wants.
Evil Willow's relationship
with Xander is not unlike an evil version of Will and Xander's relationship
in Season 5 (post-gay), that is, it is not strictly sexual beyond the flirtatious.
However, with Willow, and perhaps with Cordelia, evil Willow seems very
sexual. At first this seems just a confusion with the usual vampiric hunger-lust,
but consider this; almost invariably, vampires in Buffy kill the opposite
sex. Sometimes we see a female vampire feeding on a woman, but we rarely,
if ever, see a male vampire feeding on a man. But vampire Willow is automatically
drawn to women. Vampirism and sex are always tangled together, so I think
it's no accident that evil Willow prefers the same sex. The point about
this is that it can be subconscious to the writers, as well as the fictional
characters. No doubt Joss Whedon wanted to make evil Willow 'kinda gay',
but in reality he made her completely gay.
GIRL
WITH A BOYFRIEND
Willow is always trying
to find acceptance, and losing her virginity she sees as an important part
of this. When her relationship with Xander collapses, Willow guiltily returns
to Oz; partly simply because she loves him, and partly because she wants
to return to being a girl with a boyfriend. Only the first part is consciously
motivating her, but the second part is still a force behind her actions.
Willow loves Oz as a friend, but she also needs him as a boyfriend too.
When Oz and Willow do finally get it on, sex is oddly put to one side.
While with Buffy and Angel, and Xander with Cordelia/Faith, sex and lust
was a key aspect, with Willow and Oz it's simply not a major concern. This
fits in with the idea that Willow loves, but doesn't sexually desire, Oz.
POST-GAY
Season 4 sees the big change
in Willow's life; the escape from High School. Now, Oz's beasty side becomes
a main factor in the plot; while his relationship with Willow was characterized
by love and affection, as a wolf Oz is different. In this season Oz turns
away from Willow, in a similar way as Xander had turned away from Cordelia
and turned to Faith. Oz's werewolf side is the simplified, primal aspect
of his character; to go all Freudian, the wolf is his Id, or his subconscious.
This aspect understands that the relationship between Willow and he is
not sexual, and that he is not connecting with her in this way. So automatically
the werewolf searches elsewhere; he finds a female werewolf, and finds
the sexual attraction which was missing with Willow. Because of this, Oz
cannot now control the werewolf side. The bestial part of his nature arises,
and he can't satisfy it. He leaves, consciously to try and overcome his
werewolf part, but subconsciously to try and reconcile himself to living
a life with Willow without a sexual connection.
When Willow loses Oz, she
loses a friend, and someone she loves. But she doesn't lose her soulmate,
because the relationship she has with Oz cannot be any deeper than that
she has with, for example, Xander. In Tara, Willow finds her soulmate,
and someone with whom she can be completely honest and free. It's only
when Willow is free of High School and in love with another woman that
she can finally come out as gay, not just to others but more importantly
to herself. Tara has to be Willow's only true love, because she
is the only person who was capable of making Willow understand herself,
more even than her own doppleganger could. When Willow says that Tara is
the only person she has ever opened up to and been completely honest with,
she's not exaggerating.
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