This is The End, my Only Friend, The End. (Part 2) : The Pre-Finale Rant

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Welcome Fans of The Joss Almighty to another edition of the RANT! Today, Eric and I will be pre-showing it up. No, this isn't an episode rant...no, we won't be discussing spoilers. This is a rant about the last season, where the finale may take us, and what's in the future.

Matt: So Eric, we've come to the end. 44 minutes away.

Eric: *Sobs Uncontrollably* WHY JOSSS WHYYYYYYYYYYYYY!

Matt: It'll be ok. Take your ritalin.

Eric: *Downs 6 Vicodin with a fifth of Vodka*

Matt: I didn't mention Vodka, but ok.

Eric: You didn't mention Vicodin either.

Matt: Good point.

Lawyer: Black Swan does not support or endorse any type of recreational drug use, unless that drug is approved by the United States Government, and you are of appropriate age. Drink Responsibly.

Matt: Do you realize what we pay him by the hour??!! Get him out of here! He'll want Rant pay!

Eric: *Hits lawyer with Vodka Bottle*

*Lawyer turns into a rat and scurries away*

Eric: Damn it! I lost him.

Matt: That's alright, the cat will eat him. What is there to say about the Buffyverse? 12 seasons, man....12 seasons.

Eric: 12 wonderfall, excuse me, wonderful seasons. We laughed, we cried, hell, he even got us to like Connor....and Dawn.

Matt: The man can make us change our thoughts in one scene.

Eric: And don't forget the many friends we have lost along the way.

Matt: We told the mailman not to interrupt us during an episode. Oh wait, you mean the characters?

Eric: Yes, not people who we killed.

Lawyer: Black Swan does not support or endorse any type of recreational murder, unless that murder is approved by the United States Government, and you are of appropriate age. Kill Responsibly.

Matt: How did you turn back??!! Son of a bitch! Mr. Snugglekins...get him!

*The cat leaps at the lawyer and claws his eyes out - the lawyer runs away screaming*

Eric: That's better.

Mr. Snugglekins: Black Swan does support and endorse any type of recreational lawyer murder, even if that murder is approved by the United States Government, and you are not of appropriate age. Kill Responsibly.

Matt: Regardless, we shouldn't turn this into some sort of eulogue for Joss. He'll be back, and so will some more shows.

Eric: We hope. The point is that this is the first time in 8 years that we are without a Jossverse show.

Matt: Yeah, this is really going to suck.

Eric: There is nothing to watch on TV anymore.

Matt: No Buffy. No Angel. No Spike. No Willow. No...dare I say....GUNN.

Eric: No GUNN.

Matt: The only thing we KNOW we can look forward to is Serenity, and that's just sad. A feature film....probably less than 2 hours long...and that's it. Nothing else is definite.

So before we go into a double drunken stuper, let's talk about this season of Angel.

Eric: This season of Angel has been it's finest...by far.

Matt: I would have to agree. Matter of fact, as I've stated several times before, I don't think any other Angel season even comes close.

Eric: This may be the best season of Joss ever.

Matt: After the 3rd episode this season, I thought it was going to be absolutely horrible. But it REALLY picked up steam when the first brilliant episode of the season came on.....LINEAGE.

Eric: After that it has just been a powerhouse - brilliant show after show.

Matt: Agreed. Sure, there have been a couple just 'ok' episodes. HARM'S WAY, SOUL PURPOSE, WHY WE FIGHT. But really, other than those 3 questionable ones, the rest have been A-grade.

Eric: No other season has played with our emotions like this one.

Matt: One could argue that it's as good if not better emotionally than Buffy Season 2, and that's saying something.

Eric: It's damn close. It all depends on "Not Fade Away" - the title a message within itself.

Matt: The moment that got me thinking this could be a great season is the balcony scene in Lineage. Evil Robot Wyndham-Price going to kill Fred, and Wes shoots him thinking he's his father. And the scene with Fred and Wes afterwards in the office was simply beautiful.

Eric: Oh yes, where we find out that Wes was convinced it was his father. You knew that this would be their season.

Matt: And the moment where I KNEW this was a great season was Cordy and Angel in YOU'RE WELCOME, when Cordy was in the room watching the video of Doyle. Right then it hit me how incredibly brilliant it had been. Not only the episode and the season...but the show. And how all these characters bring so much to the table in their own ways. And how each is three dimensional and interesting...even the ones we dislike.

And by A HOLE IN THE WORLD I wanted to give an Emmy to Joss...and Jeff Bell, and Goddard, and Fury...and all of them.

Eric: Oh my God, just the title gives me shivers. It is the saddest moment in Jossverse History. By the way, you forgot Ben.

Matt: How could I forget? SMILE TIME was hillarious. Anyone who thinks otherwise just doesn't 'get it'.

Eric: Exactly. This season - just all the ups and downs...amazing.

Matt: I guess you could say it was the season on the emotional rollercoaster. Every season Joss tries to pull off the rollercoaster, but this may be the season that it was perfectly executed.

Eric: Despite what they have said, i feel like the prepared far less for this to be the last season than they usually do.

Matt: Definitely. I don't think anyone will be satisfied with the ending. And that's not a spoiler, that's a gut feeling. They weren't ready to be cancelled. They had way more story to tell. They just ran out of episodes.

Eric: They just have to do the TV movies, or comic books, or something. I'm confident that Joss will finish his story....somehow.

Matt: I am as well. I don't think it will be with Boreanaz or Gellar. Unless at some point there aren't any job offers on the table, and they need work.

Eric: Do you really think that Boreanaz will get any offers? He ruined his career with "Valentine".

Matt: I don't know if he ruined it or not. I think it's been a long enough time period from "Valentine" that people won't pay much attention to it. I seriously doubt, however, that the job offers for him are big.

Eric: He sure hasn't done anything else.

Matt: Nowhere near what they are for Sarah, and that's saying something because she's not tearing up Hollywood or anything right now. But I do have a feeling that "The Grudge" may end up being big for her. Either really big, or a total bust.

Eric: Yeah, but the point is that we don't need them. We have others, look at Marsters. He loves Spike, and he's a fan, he treats the fans well, and he will keep coming back.

Matt: True. Also - I wouldn't count out Aly now that her sitcom went to shit.

Eric: True...and Acker. Amy loves it too.

Matt: And Nicky B is always up for it.

Eric: Yeah.

Matt: Joss has to know we would watch his shows without Buffy and Angel in them.

Eric: I bet he's counting on it.

Matt: I seriously don't think this is the end of all of it. I could be living in denial land...but maybe there's something there. Why wouldn't a Spike series work?

Eric: ...Or a Wes, or a Willow, or an Andrew.

Matt: Right.

Eric: Well, everyone says that Buffy is the next Star Trek, most people in the "biz" feel that it never will go away, like Star Trek.

Matt: I think that so many of his characters have more story in them that they could easily be made into whole series. The biggest problem I see are that many of his writers are getting big contracts with networks.

Eric: There are still good writers available, and I'm sure some of them would leave as well. They could do "iron Man" writing and have like 6 people write all the episodes.

Matt: That would be tough.

Eric: Not really. It's according to how much of a head start they have.

Matt: All I'm saying is, the good ones have moved on (for now at least). Goddard and Bell are at Alias. Fain & Craft (who weren't spectacular, but solid) are at The Shield. Marti is still hopeful 'Still Life' gets picked up. She's also working on another series. Espenson is on Gilmore Girls. That leaves Fury and Petrie.

And unfortunently for him, Tim Minear. You know, wait a second...

Joss. Minear. Greenwalt. Petrie. Fury. Wow. That could be good.

Eric: What about Ben Edlund?

Matt: Shit! I keep forgetting Ben!

*The Tick walks in and slams Matt through a wall*

The Tick: Remember...Umm Remember...something.

*Tick leaves*

Matt: Uh...*falls flat on his face*

*picks up his face from the floor*

Eric: Isn't Petrie on Tru Calling?

Matt: Yes, Petrie is on Tru Calling, but who cares? That will be cancelled in 4 episodes after the season 2 premiere. Just as soon as we start covering it. We're like the deathnail for TV shows.

Eric: I am surprised you remember what we're doing after your boyfriend bitch slapped you.

Matt: I vaguely remember. Anyway, HMC opens March 2002 - Buffy ends May 2003. HMC goes combo Feb 2003 - Angel ends May 2004. HMC covers Wonderfalls - Wonderfalls gets cancelled after 4 episodes.

See?

Eric: Maybe we should shut down.

Matt: It'd be better...if we want to actually watch our shows.

Most memorable Angel moments, ready?

Eric: Well, obviously Fred's Death.

Matt: Doyle's death in HERO. Wes in leather biker pants...that was a trip.

Eric: Cordy in season 5. Leather Wes, huh? Umm...also Wes trying to steal Lilah's contract.

Matt: Darla in a box at the end of Season 1. Lindsey getting his hand chopped off.

Eric: Lorne getting his head choped off. Darla staking herself. Andrew arriving at W&H and seeing Spike.

Matt: Connor arriving from Kortoth. Fred as a pothead in Spin The Bottle.

Eric: God, there are too many.

Eric: Wes shooting his father. Wes and Fred's first kiss.

Matt: Nina and her big jugs. Cordy and her big jugs. Fred and her.... well, eyes.

Eric: ASS. Fred PERIOD.

Matt: What? She doesn't have big jugs, big deal. I wasn't making fun... I was just saying, I can't say big jugs again.

Eric: Moments, not body parts.

Matt: Oh, right. Sorry...boobies got me turned around.

Eric: You're just covering.

Matt: Angel on the beach in the daylight in IN THE DARK.

Eric: Yeah.

Matt: Cordy and Angel in YOU'RE WELCOME. Cordy thinking Harmony was a lesbian in DISHARMONY.

Eric: Angel and Buffy in...*shivers*...I WILL REMEMBER YOU.

Matt: I'll pass on that moment, thanks.

"I'll take away your bucket." Best....line...ever!!!

Eric: Yes, and..."If nothing that we do matters then all that matters is what we do."

Top 5 Personal Favorite Season 5 Episodes

Matt: 1. A Hole In The World
2. Origin
3. You're Welcome
4. Lineage
5. Damage/Power Play

Eric: 1. A Hole in the World
2. Power Play/Lineage
3. Damage
4. Smile Time
5. Life of the Party

Matt: Great episodes. It's hard to choose.

Eric: Very.

Matt: So what's left to be said?

Eric: All in all, I am saddened by the loss of the Jossverse show. Joss has shown us that real worlds can be created from ink and paper. Thank you Joss, and you, Mutant Enemy. And I hope you burn in hell, Levin.

Matt: All in all, I wish death to all WB execs, especially the aforementioned Jordan Levin. And I thank Mutant Enemy and Joss Whedon for stimulating my brain every Wednesday and Tuesday.

Eric: I bid you a fond farewell until you reopen this book again.

Matt: That's it for the pre-show. We'll see you on Thursday when we Rant about the Angel FINALE.

Eric: The Rant Finale.

Matt: ...or is it?