Poobah says:
How would I know?....except for that one time on the Dungeons & Dragons board game.

...but we'll leave it at that.

From Stephen Barendt:
Poobsy Dear, what did you think of the Friends finale? Were you in tears like me?

Poobah says:
No! No I wasn't! You can't prove a damn thing!

*sniff* It was so beautiful.

From Frnchgrl:
How good is your french, O' grand Poobah?

Poobah Says:
It sucks....just like your country.

From Dust:
Why didn't Wesley tell Fred's parents that she was dead? Is he that much of an ass?

Poobah says:
Yes.

From Dannyboy:
King Bitch or Queen Bastard?

Poobah says:
Duke Douchebag.

From Life's A Show:
Why oh why did Fred have to die?

Poobah says:
It was in the script.

From wretch:
I recently thru my TV set out the window, SCTV style. Now what do I do? Besides organizing cockfighting, that is?

Poobah says:
Pitbull fighting. It's just as fun...with less cock. Hmmm, ok...maybe not that last part.

From Life's A Show:
I can't help but notice that El Presidente is having to throw a second Mutant Enemy Finale Party in as many years. I want to know, would this perhaps be Marsters' fault? Or is it yours??

Poobah says:
Everything is Marsters' fault. Marsters was the 2nd gunman on the grassy nole. Marsters shot J.R. Marsters broke up Van Halen. Marsters was a juror in the O.J trial. Marsters gave me the clap. Everything is that damned James Marsters' fault.

From Dannyboy:
Are you still single? have you considered starting a Hellhounds dating service given the success of some relationships?

Poobah says:
I'm seeing someone. She's tacked up on my wall as I type. And I never have to talk to her or spend money on her. It's a beautiful relationship. I love you, Jessica Alba poster.

From My Sister:
Why is a Dog called a dog instead of a zebra and why is a pig called a pig instead of a tree? These are questions I have been asking for years.

Poobah Says:
If these are questions you've been asking yourself for years, you may want to find a surgeon to remove the retard out of you, 'cause you have a bit seeping out right there.

Send me some questions for next week! Email me here. Put "ask the poobah" in your subject line, and remember to give a name! :)

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