Alternate realities inspire us. They are fascinating to think about. What would have happened had somebody somewhere made different choices than the ones they actually made in their lives? How different would the world have been? It seems we’ve been asking this question for a while. The film “It’s a Wonderful Life” grew world famous over this idea...and as a result we all must endure watching it for everytime christmas season that rolls around. Personally, I like “Life is Beautiful” better as a movie, but since it has nothing to do with alternate realities, we’re just going to pretend I didn’t say that. Consider it an alternate reality where never actually wrote that sentence.

But truthfully, by show of hands, how many here have wished at some point or another that they did something differently in their life? Just what I thought. All of you have. It’s human nature. We second guess decisions, even small ones like “Should I have ordered two big macs or just one?” Things as small as this, after all, can have drastic effects on the whole. Just look at the Butterfly Effect. Hell, read Michael Crichton’s Timeline novel to get an idea of just how powerful alternate realities can be and how drastically our world is shaped by the choices we sign onto.

Both large and small, decisions shape our world. And in the Buffyverse, things are no different. We learned this in a little episode called “The Wish” and ever since it has aired fans all over the world have longed for more and more information about this alternate reality. It has inspired them to seek out info on how this world was created by one simple change in plans. The premise? Buffy never came to Sunnydale way back in 1996. The result? The Hellmouth takes pride in its first syllable.

It’s a chilling discovery, a world where Buffy Summers never set foot within Sunnydale, California. One simple choice changes the world. Is it possible? Sure it’s possible. It’s more than possible. But does the fact that it’s possible mean that it was completely without error or fault? Of course not. If I wasn’t here to nitpick The Wish, I’d be just singing praises all day. And we all know how boring that could get. So, here are a few points to raise regarding this wishful episode...

To begin, let’s raise a question regarding the situation. It’s an alternate reality Season Three universe and The Master is now fully in charge. First problem, how did the Master get out of the ground to begin with? Is it because of The Harvest? Nothing inside of the prophecy seemed to prove true in this instance, even though it was pretty set on happening from all angles within the episode that defined this prophecy in the first season. Of course, being as how this alternate reality was based on a critical part of the prophecy (Buffy being in Sunnydale) never happening, it’s possible that this universe isn’t really a possible universe at all...but rather a jumbled collection of images that are distorted since they are forced. In other words, this reality isn’t a reality...but rather an everchanging collage of strange occurences. Even so, I don’t like to think that way. It takes the fun out of things for me, so we’ll keep believing it’s a reality for the time being.

This being the case, where is Luke? Shouldn’t he still be among The Master’s minions? Or Darla? Please don’t tell me Giles and the White Hats could defeat Luke and Darla but not Xander Harris and Willow Rosenberg. Or maybe it was Angel who killed them. Still, same problem rises. Don’t get me wrong. Willow would have been kicking ass if she had near as much wiccan ability as she did in Season Six, but the truth is that if Willow was sired prior to any of that, she never met Jenny Calendar. She never had a chance to spark an interest into the wicca scene. In short, she’s just a mousy kid. And we all know where mousy kids end up in regard to stakes, right? If not, please refer to Jesse.

But still, this problem isn’t really a problem. It’s really just odd that The Master holds so much respect for newbie vampires. Buffy staked Xander pretty easily, and all it took to rid the world of Willow was Oz and Larry.

Meanwhile, Darla and Luke have been around for ages. Luke even nearly killed Buffy. How did Giles and his White Hats prevail? It’s still possible, but I feel it wasn’t well developed nor explainable. Darla is in the same boat regarding that. She’s survived hundreds of years. Xander and Willow, at most, have been vamps for about two to two and a half years. They’re still newbies.
The idea we seem to take is that Xander has taken over for Luke and Will has taken over for Darla. The Master regards both characters like their predecessors, so it seems a hearty assumption one could make. Still doesn’t answer the previous questions, but apparently we’ll just have to let them slide. It was simply something used to sell the episode, and we’ll just have to leave it at that.

We also have to take into account the time for change. In the two years since The Master has been raised from the bottom of the Earth, why is he suddenly deciding to do what he could have done two years back? Why take this long? A question that will also go unanswered. Also, here’s another question. Why couldn’t he have thought of something smarter than the factory? Sure, it looked cool, but I could have whipped that machine thing together in less than a week myself. Why not branch out to the rest of the world? Why stay in Sunnydale? Why hasn’t The Master been able to take the entire town by now?

Next we have the idea of Buffy coming back to town. First of all, what the hell is with the scar? What happened to super slayer strength? She’s taken a hell of a lot worse beatings than a cut lip in the past (and since then too), yet doesn’t seem to retain any of those markings. So, aside from just the feel of a new character, what was the realistic implications given? Wait a minute. Am I asking for realistic implications in a show about a vampire slayer? Yeah, I’ve been doing this writing gig here for way too damn long.

Secondly, on the topic of Buffy, what about Spike and Drusilla? In the second season we found out that Spike and Dru were hunting down the slayer, so why didn’t they go off looking for her at her other location (namely, Cleveland)? Based on the character profile of Buffy, we get the feel that she has a suicide wish. Isn’t that how Spike said he likes them? Now I’m reminded of Nikki, but Buffy’s looked a whole lot worse to be completely honest. Spike could have taken her easily at that weakened state. She didn’t have her support staff with her. So, why didn’t everybody’s favorite vampire couple take a fun tour into getting her killed? At least one part of the prophecy stayed the same. Buffy Summers was killed by The Master.

I have to ask this next one too. Why is Larry with the White Hats? Should I even grace this question with an explanation or even bother searching for an answer? Nancy was an interesting idea, since none of us really have a clue who the hell she is. But now that we know the personality that is Larry, what has driven him to this point? It’s extremely possible, so don’t get me wrong. But why Larry? Okay, okay. This one really isn’t a problem. It’s just funny to think of Larry being the protector of the Hellmouth. We’ll let this one slide. It was interesting idea. Also shows how different the students are...and how much more aware they are of their surroundings.

Interesting how the Council seems not to care about everything going on in Sunnydale. Why is Giles the only watcher there (or should I say ex-watcher)? Why hasn’t the most powerful secret organization society in the world even checked up on the place? Why did Buffy’s watcher not believe Giles talking about the hellmouth...especially considering Cleveland is the location of a hellmouth as well? How could this not go detected by what is supposedly the most powerful organization on the planet? And while we’re talking about this, where is Robin Wood? Where is Holden Webster? And more than anything, where is this sidenote going?

To top all of these things, where is the Initiative? Hell, where was the Initiative in the real reality when graduation was taking place? But since we’re on the note of alternate realities, we will stick to only worrying about “The Wish.” So, where are they? Why haven’t they gone into fight the baddies on the hellmouth? From the look of things, the universe that is “The Wish” didn’t really seem too hard to snuff out with the proper machinery. This is actually disappointing. I expected more from The Master.

More seriously, what about the Mayor? He built the town for demons to feed on. We’ll never know. And how come Harmony survives yet Willow and Xander die? Where is Jesse? How did Cordelia survive the Harvest if that is where everything took place from? Or is that just a point of fact since Cordy was the one who wished for this whole world in the first place? Aggghhhhh! It’s driving me nuts.

This episode raises questions, sure. And I’ve got a feeling most of them might not have answers...like ever. But regardless, “The Wish” still stands as a fun episode to watch. It shows us the power of choices, and that is an extremely good life-learning lesson. Not to say that we should all dabble into the area of regret, but it would be nice to sometimes remember before we make big decisions in life that we should carefully consider where one might be led as a result.

Damn, is the Weekly Ascension spouting off about life lessons now? Well, this sucks. The article series has been downgraded to an after school special. I might as well start doing a Seventh Heaven column. Okay, let’s not even think about that kind of an alternate reality. Horrifying. By the way, if someone ever does wish for that universe where I’m writing such things, be a dear and stake me while you’re there. I’ll thank you for it in the after life.

Okay, point of the day is that everybody makes choices and everybody experiences regret. For instance, I regret signing on to do this article series, as I could be sitting on the beach right now instead of typing madly at a computer. But hey, sometimes we’ve just gotta suck up and deal. That’s the valuable life lesson of the day. Join me next week for another one. Yeah, life sucks. Get over it.

And before I go, one final note. KD Aubert (actress who played Nikki Wood in Season Seven of Buffy) can be seen making a special appearance in the film “Hollywood Homicide” currently playing in theaters. KD Aubert is not to be confused with April Weeden-Washington (who played as Nikki Wood in Season Five of Buffy), so bear that in mind before watching. And do watch. Even if you think the rest of the movie sucks, it still has a Buffy person in it. So that’s points for something, right? Okay, maybe it isn’t. Just a shameless plug for a Buffy actress trying to make it in hollywood. See you all again next time. Bye for now.