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Like a crazy twist in a Shyamalan flick, Brandon Lee arose from the dead last week and shot David Boreanaz square in the ass. When reached for comment, Brandon the zombie said, "Look, he plays a bad guy in a crow movie. I'm the Crow, so I did something about it. Jesus people, put two and two together! Who else is going to do it? Edward Furlong??!! That pussy couldn't last 2 minutes against me. I'm a better Crow, and I have something seeping out of my left ear. Who cast this movie??! His Mom??!!"
We tried to get a word with David Boreanaz, but he was too busy doing his Forrest Gump impression of being shot in the ass. He's a weird, weird guy.
		
		  
		
		
 
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