K: < SMASH > Sorry. I guess I have trouble expressing myself verbally. It's something I struggle with.

K: Supervisor Caffrey shot himself?
Thug: It happens.
K: In the back of the head? Wrapped himself in plastic? And he locked himself in the trunk of his car?
Thug: He'd been depressed.

A: It's about time!
D: Not a lot of enchanted swordsmiths open on Sunday.

C: Okay. Am I wrong in thinking that a please and thank you is generally considered good form when requesting a dismemberment?!
D: Well, he appreciates us in his own . . . unappreciative way.

C: You know what I think? I think he uses his tortured, creature of the night status as a license to be rude and insensitive. Sure, he's polite to the helpless and the downtrodden. But he ignores the people who are close to him, the people who matter the most, you know? Can you say clueless?

C: Does giant tentacle spew come out with dry cleaning?

A: Cordelia, you need to...
C: No! I don't care what horrible thing is about to happen -- asteroids are hurtling towards Earth, unspeakable evil is rising in the San Fernando Valley, Jar Jar is getting his own talk show, whatever -- I don't want to hear about it. Not 'til you ask us how it went.
A: ... call your mother back.

C: You do remember leaving us in the sewer with a giant calamari?

A: So there is a point?
C: Being that it is possible to brood *and* show a little interest in the feelings of others.
D: Oh, she thinks you're insensitive and, not to bring up the irony, but consider the source.
A: So I'm a little reserved, doesn't mean I don't care.
C: It's as if you don't have a pulse.
A: I don't.

C: Mr. And Mrs. Spock need to mind meld now.

A: Cordelia, I wanted to, you know, thank you... so much for going through the coroner's reports because.... I can imagine how not fun it is to read about, you know, coroner stuff.
C: Lame.

A: What've you got?
C: The weebies.

A: Hi! This is exciting isn't it? I just love a boat trip.
LT: Who's the mook?
A: Herb Saunders from Baltimore!

A: It's the hat wasn't it? I knew the hat was too much.

K: Which part of 'just get out of there' gave you the trouble?
A: I had to do something, I mean, he was getting away.
K: So, you decided to dress like a road flare and put my ass and yours on the line?

LT: I want my phone call.
K: Need to cancel your suite in Yerevan? Think you can still get your deposit back?

LT: If I'd known how bad you wanted me, I mighta let you catch me sooner.
K: If I'd known how much you needed the exercise, I might've let you run a little longer.

K: Aw, is he afraid to stay with us? Do you need a night light?

L: I want her verbal abuse entered in the records.
K: T'oh!
L: That "T'oh!", too.

L: We'll shine light in the darkest corners of this precinct and give the people a view of the brutality and callousness of this police force that will make Mark Fuhrman look like Gentle Ben.
LT: Everybody should have a lawyer like this one.

C: You've got pensive face.
A: I've always got pensive face.
C: Pensiv-er face.

C: Mmm-hmmm!
A: What?
C: Nothing! I just find it endlessly fascinating how your instincts are so highly attuned when it comes to boring old evil, but you have yet to make any mention of these new shoes.
A: Look, Cordelia. Women's shoes. . . men. . . they just don't. . . .
D: Great shoes! New?

D: So, you were right. Papasian's planning something.
A: What did you hear?
D: Papasian's planning something.
A: That's it?
D: Johnny Red says, quote, "Papasian's planning something."
A: I thought he might be planning something.
D: See? You were right.

A: I think Papasian's taken a contract out on you.
K: Wow, he's really acting out isn't he?
A: Well, yeah. He wants you dead.
K: I get that. I'm just saying he must be in some kind of pain to have to strike out at others in that way.
A: Are you okay?

K: Listen to me. Suddenly I'm Dr. Laura.

SG: After tomorrow's session, you'll see results. Incredible results.
L: That makes me feel all warm inside.

K: Boy, I'm scared. And excited. And consumed with dread. I'm glad you're here.
A: I doubt even one of Little Tony's hired guns will try something in a room full of cops.
K: What? Oh you mean that death threat hanging overhead. No, I meant speaking in public.
A: What's that old saw? Picture your audience in their underwear?
K: < looks him up and down > Way ahead of you.

C: All right, I'm here. What's the big emergency? These middle of the night hours are really eating into my potential social life. Why I ever thought it was a nifty idea to work for a vamp-triloquist. Hi!

K: You have the most intense eyes. I see such an old soul.
D: He gets that a lot, you know.

C: What's her deal? To much, uh, < makes a drinking motion >
D: Thumb sucking?
C: Alcohol!
D: Don't look at me like that. I'm not the one who needs to brush up on her finger pantomime.

K: Someone's got a crush!

K: Look at Doyle. Really look at him. What do you really see?
C: A bad double polyblend?
K: That's defense, Cordelia. Maybe you should try to open your heart to a new possibility.
D: Hey, you know, she's starting to make some sen--
C: Angel!

C: I'm so glad we came down here to watch Late Night with Creepy Cop Lady.

C: Can we get you some coffee? Or valium? Or both?

D: Why don't we all just...
K: Help each other?!
D: Right, by staying here together.
K: Well we could do that, but see I have this...
C: Personal problem you're gonna share 'til dawn?
K: ...gun. And I don't want to come off as insensitive, but if either one of you try to stop me I'll have to blow you the crap away.

A: Which demon do you worship? Which one gives you power?
SG: A whole bunch, actually. I'm a polytheist.

SG: What were your parents like?
A: My parents were great. Tasted a lot like chicken.

OF1: ::opens cell doors:: Remember this brothers. An act of kindness is just as manly as.... ::THUD::

OF2: You want to talk about whiplash. I'll tell you about whiplash.

OF3: I hear what you're saying. But I don't think you're listening to your mugger's feelings at all.

A: Okay, I think someone needs a hug!
C: Uh, ew! Ew!

C: Hey! What's your damage?!
D: I think we just found Mr. Sensitivity.
A: Mmm. He was right in here all the time, just waiting to come out. Gosh, what our folks do to us, huh?

C: He put the whammie on you! You stink of whammie!

A: The talking stick is cursed all right.
C: There's a stick that talks?

A: Cordelia, do you have any idea how precious you are?

A: He admitted it to me after I < sigh> threatened him with physical violence.

A: It'll wear off.
C: Soon?!

D: So there was never any contract on Detective Lockley?
A: No, Little Tony's plan all along was to kill her himself. Poor guy.
C: Poor guy?!
A: Well, he's got issues.

D: Angel, come on. You've got to snap out of this.
C: Right now. It's time for you to get all vampy and... GRRR! Kate needs you!
A: I don't want to. You both withdraw when I go vamp. I feel you judge me.
C: We won't judge you. Will we? Give it a try.
A: Closeness is too important to me right now.

OF4: We're closed.
D: You're the police. You can't close!
OF4: Why not? Haven't we done enough? It's always "find this" "rescue that" with you people.

OF5: I want to express my regret for having treated you so shabbily. So I composed a poem about it. "I saw a leaf, and I did cry...."

C: We need a rock.
A: I can't say that I'm very comfortable with all this.
C: Don't argue. This is the only way in.

C: Aim for the window.
D: I was!
C: Give me that. < CRASH >
D: Nice arm.

A: Wow. That's vandalism.
D: Ah, we'll take care of it later.
A: We should leave a note.

C: Would you come on!
A: What's the magic word?
C: Ugh!
A: No, I don't think "Ugh" is the magic word, if one would call it a word and even then certainly not a magic one.
C: We don't have time for this.
A: There's always time to be considerate of others, Cordelia.
C: Oh please.
A: See, wasn't so hard, now, was it?

K: I am not a bitch! I'm just protected.
LT: No one's protecting you now.
A: Hey! I'm feeling some serious negative energy in this room.

LT: Oh, I've been wanting to see you again.
K: I'm sure he'd say the same thing, but that gun really makes you come off as hostile.
A: That and the body language. It's so closed.
K: Yeah!

A: Now, why don't we all just sit down together and process this.

A: < SMASH > Okay, now I'm feeling unheard.

A: You know, Anthony, you can be a rainbow and not a < SMASH > pain-bow.

K: You!
A: No, you!

C: Anyone for vomit?

A: It's so sad, isn't it?
K: Some people just really need to live in the problem.