The Dark Rose

By darkmagickwillow

Copyright © May 2003

 

Rating: R

Disclaimer: I don't own any of the copyrights or anything else associated with BtVS. All rights lie with the production company, writers etc.

Distribution: Ask and ye shall receive

/mysticmuse.net

Feedback: Yes! Constructive criticism is always welcome. 

Spoilers: Everything up to the end of Season 6.

Pairing: Willow/Tara

Author's Notes: Magic, even dark magic, is not addictive in this story, so there are no withdrawal symptoms and no dark magic dealers. Here Rack was a dark magic teacher who used his students, not a dealer. However, you can use too much magic and you can be corrupted by the power it gives you.

Acknowledgements: Thanks to my betas, Amanda and Juli, for quick turnaround of this chapter so that a chapter can be posted while I'm busy moving. Special thanks to Juli for understanding what holds this chapter together and giving me a better title than the one I thought of.

Summary: Willow takes Tara to the hospital.  

Chapter 9 (Wards)

Willow slammed open the emergency ward doors with her mind as she carried Tara's unconscious form across the threshold. It was less than an hour after sundown so there were only a couple of patients sitting in the waiting area--later in the night, the ward would be full of "neck trauma" victims.

Willow ignored the patients, scanning the room for a nurse or doctor. Spotting a nurse behind the desk at the far side of the room, she stared into him with her dark eyes and commanded, "Get a doctor now!"

The nurse immediately disappeared through the door behind the desk. Less than a minute later, a doctor and a couple of nurses wheeling a gurney rushed through the double doors that led back to the emergency department. One of the nurses started to pull Tara out of Willow's arms but desisted when Willow glared at her with her black-in-black eyes.

She gently placed Tara on the gurney, then reluctantly moved away so the medical professionals could examine her. The nurses checked the blonde's heart rate and blood pressure, while the doctor, a short-haired woman in her early thirties, asked, "What happened?"

Willow was ready for this question. "She lost consciousness and has an irregular heartbeat," she answered.

The doctor quickly verified that Tara's heartbeat was erratic, then asked, "What was the cause?"

"I don't know," Willow responded. She didn't know exactly what had happened with the spell and the ghost, but Spirit had told her that the spectre had reached inside Tara with its ghostly hand. That wasn't something she could tell the doctor though. She had felt so helpless when Tara had collapsed. Demons and ghosts she could deal with, but an injured girlfriend was a more difficult problem even if she wasn't quite your girlfriend yet.

"Has she had any symptoms like these in the past?" the doctor asked.

Willow shook her head impatiently. "No," she said. She knew that all these questions had to be answered, but she wanted the doctor making Tara better now.

The doctor continued asked her questions. "What's her name?" she asked. "Is she taking any medications and does she have any known allergies to medications?"

"Her name's Tara Lucas." But Willow didn't know the answer to the other question. She knew that in the past Tara didn't have any allergies or take any medications, but she didn't know anything now about her. Yet she should have known! She knew what kind of life Tara lived so she should have been prepared for a simple hospital visit. Distressed, her voice was small and almost ashamed as she confessed that she didn't know the answers to the doctor's questions.

"Okay, we'll take her back now," she said. "Wait here." The nurses wheeled the gurney carrying Tara through the double doors. They were followed closely by the doctor.

Willow started to follow, ignoring the doctor's order. The doctor turned, holding a hand. "I'm sorry," she said. "But you'll have to wait here. We'll let you know what's happening as soon as we know."

Willow started to raise a hand, beginning a gesture that would throw the doctor out of her way. Then she stopped, realizing that she couldn't help Tara like that. Standing over the doctors while they worked would probably be distracting. The best thing she could do was wait, but she didn't have to like it. She turned away and started pacing, impatiently checking the clock on the wall every few seconds.

After only a couple of minutes, Willow resumed worrying. What was taking them so long? Could the erratic heartbeat indicate something more serious than she thought? If it wasn't serious, why had Tara collapsed? The doctor seemed to be competent, but maybe she should have gone to the best hospital instead of the closest one. What was the best hospital in Sunnydale anyway? She should have researched that too.

Looking up at the clock, she saw that another minute had passed. Perhaps taking a long time was good, indicating that they were able to help Tara. If they came back quickly, that could be bad. But what if taking a long time meant something else? What if they were taking Tara into surgery without letting her know? They probably didn't think she was a family member so they might not even tell her.

The doctor finally emerged from the double doors. Willow rushed over to meet her, asking, "Is she going to be alright?"

"Yes, we've stabilized her heart rate. She's sleeping normally now."

Willow turned abruptly away from the doctor as felt a wave of relief wash through her body. "Can she come home?" she asked, then wondered whether she should take Tara to her dorm or the mansion.

"No," the doctor said. "We want to keep her overnight to monitor her heart to be safe."

Willow was disappointed at the news but she was all for being safe where Tara was concerned so she didn't object. "Where can I see her?" she asked.

"Are you family?"

"No, but..."

"Then you can see her in the morning during visitation hours," the doctor interrupted.

Willow's stared at the doctor with her dark eyes, pushing with an iron will that had sustained her for nineteen years on her dark quest. "No," she said. "I'm going to see her now." The doctor started to object, but Willow intensified the stare, silencing her. Willow pushed past the doctor and walked through the double doors.

Willow focused on her link with Tara, letting it guide her to the right room in the hospital. The different wards of the hospital were a maze of identical corridors and rooms, but she never faltered or had to backtrack. She followed her sense of Tara's presence through the children's ward then the orthopedic ward before finding the private patient's rooms. Reaching room 97, she opened the door and saw Tara sleeping in the bed, her blonde hair spilling over the pillow. She stepped inside, closing the door quietly behind her.

She sat down in the uncomfortable chair that faced the bed and settled down to wait. She didn't know how long it would take for Tara to wake but she would be here when Tara did. The room was only dimly lit by a bank of electronics by the bedside that Willow supposed were monitoring Tara's heart rate, but she could still make out the golden color of Tara's hair. Tara's face had a serenity in her sleep here that it had lacked in her earlier unconsciousness. She was an angel in repose.

Willow felt like she could sit here and watch Tara sleep forever. It had been so long since she had. Tonight she had been terrified that she was going to lose Tara again, but she could feel her worries lifting as she watched the slow rise and fall of her chest as she breathed.

There was an inherent purity in her expression that called to Willow, reminding her that this was the same Tara she had loved and lost so long ago. Despite the small differences in their features, that purity brought forth an essential sameness in the face she watched now and the one she held close in her memory. This was her beautiful Tara. She was so calm and still, looking like she always did when Willow watched her sleep.

Her fingers trembled as she reached over to touch Tara's face. She had wanted to do this since the moment she had met this Tara. Willow lightly stroked the velvet softness of Tara's cheek. It had been so long since she had been able to touch someone this intimately. She wouldn't have dared this now if she had been watched by Tara's wakeful eyes, but someday they would be this close again.

Willow became very still as she heard someone walk by the door. If it was the annoying doctor again, she was going to do something drastic. Then the footsteps continued down the corridor, allowing her to relax. She didn't deal well with authority figures, especially after her experiences with the Council of Watchers. She let her mind drift back to the night when she had discovered how dangerous the Council was.

Willow woke suddenly in the dark, immediately aware of the presence of several people in her room. They were completely silent. How had they gotten past her wards? Then there was no more time for questions as she heard two of them stealthily approaching her.

Feigning sleep, she waited until they were close, then she struck the man to her left with all her force, throwing him into the wall with a loud crunch. She flowed forward with her blow, tumbling out of bed. Behind her, she heard the sound of a blade hacking into the mattress.

They weren't here to capture her.

They were here to kill her.

She quickly surveyed the room, her dark eyes easily finding the four black clad men in the almost total darkness of the room. The man she had struck was unconscious, but the man with the blade jumped over the bed, hacking at her. With preternatural speed, she caught the blade in her hand as it swung towards her and ripped it out of his hand, tossing it negligently behind her. The blade had only made a crease in her palm, the sharp edge unable to cut through the layers of protective enchantments embedded in her flesh. She backhanded the disarmed man, smashing him hard into a wall.

Only two left.

They were ready with guns as she turned to face them. She hated guns. Before she could react, they opened fire. Her intricately layered hexagonal networks of protective spells shed most of the bullets harmlessly, but there were too many of them for all of them to be stopped. Slowed by her defenses, the few bullets that got through still ripped into her body painfully, tearing flesh and cracking bones. A wave of agony rippled through her. She had been hurt before, but never like this. She collapsed against the wall behind her as the shooters emptied their clips, and slid helplessly to the floor.

As she struggled to get back up despite the pain, she saw the two men approaching her. Her vision narrowed, seeing them through a red haze. Her mind worked sluggishly, trying to find a way to avoid being killed here. More out of instinct than anything else, she whispered a word of power.

The man on the right collapsed bonelessly to the floor, his body inhumanly limp as it fell. As the other man turned to his fallen partner, she whispered the word again. He emitted a faint mewl as he too fell to the ground, his bones melted by her spell.

She struggled to stand up again. A giant burst of pain caused her to gray out, and she slid back down to the floor. As she regained full consciousness, she spat blood from her mouth. There were internal injuries, but she had to know if these were the only ones trying to kill her now.

She'd have to crawl to them as she was too weak to read their minds from here. At least her legs worked even if it was too painful to stand. Her body would regenerate anything short of a spinal injury. The enchantments of protection and regeneration had required some of the darkest rituals she'd ever performed, but their worth with showing now.

She crawled over to one of the limp forms, each movement a burst of agony, and pressed her hand to his forehead. As she read his mind, her first feeling was relief. These four were the entire team that had been sent after her. Her next feeling was rage.

The Council of Watchers had sent them, and they would send others once they received word of this team's failure.

Willow had barely made it out of there before the police arrived, but she had dealt with the Watcher's Council. She had made them an offer they shouldn't have refused. It was far more of a chance than they had given her, but they refused anyway. Now they no longer existed to trouble her or anyone else.

She shook her head to free it of the darkness of the past, and smiled again as she looked at Tara. The darkness was behind her now. The Master had been returned to his grave and would trouble them no longer. Once they were together, they could leave this town where such terrible things happened with appalling regularity.

She was growing closer to Tara with every day. With the thought that they would be together soon in her mind, she settled down in the chair to watch over the woman she loved.

Hours later, Tara rolled over and stretched like a cat, arms first then legs. Her blue eyes blinked open as she realized that she wasn't in her bed. She looked around the room, bewildered, trying to figure out where she was.

"Where am I?" Tara asked in a confused voice, surprised to see Willow. She would have been afraid waking up in a strange place, but Willow's presence calmed and reassured her.

Willow stood up, her movements stiff from spending too long in the uncomfortable chair, and walked over the bed. "You're in the hospital."

"What happened?" Tara asked, her eyes wide with worry. She was still fuzzy about what had happened tonight, but she remembered the spectre and that she had been casting a spell with Willow.

"You're going to be fine," Willow reassured her. "You collapsed as we finished the spell. Your heartbeat was erratic so I brought you here."

More details came to her as her mind grew more wakeful. "What about Mr. Giles and Spirit?" Tara said, still looking worried.

"They're fine too," Willow said. "The spectre is gone. I left Spirit at the library to take care of Giles. He's probably doing better than you are."

Tara felt better, knowing that her friends were safe. That settled, what she wanted to do was to get out of here as fast as she could. Hospitals were the worst places. "Can I leave now that I'm awake?"

Willow saw that Tara wanted to go now, but she knew it was best to be safe and follow the doctor's orders. She didn't want anything to go wrong with Tara now that she'd found her again. "No, they want you to stay for observation."

"But you said I was fine," Tara said worriedly. She had discovered when her mother was in the hospital that doctors were less than forthright with bad news.

"You are," Willow said soothingly. "The doctor said so, but she also wanted to be sure that your heartbeat didn't become irregular again."

"I'll be fine," Tara said plaintively. "I don't get attacked by a spectre every night."

"No, just by vampires," Willow retorted. She understood how Tara felt, having not allowed injuries to stop her when she was helping the slayer, but that didn't mean that she was going to let Tara out of here a minute before the doctors said that she was okay to depart.

"So I live a hazardous lifestyle," Tara said, smiling crookedly up at Willow. She hated being in the hospital, but Willow being here with her made it better. Tara hoped Willow would stay with her through the night. Nights were the worst when you were all by yourself in one of these rooms.

Willow sat down on the edge of the bed by Tara and looked somberly at her. "You should have told me before we started the spell."

Tara looked down, letting her long hair fall forward to cover her face. She knew that she should have told Willow, but she'd been afraid of what Willow would have done without her help. How could she tell Willow that though? Had she done the wrong thing because she'd been too afraid to confront Willow?

Why was she so scared of that? Willow had never given her a reason to be afraid of her. Then Tara realized what she was afraid of--she was scared that Willow would see that as a rejection and leave her. When had Willow become so important to her?

Willow gently touched her shoulder, feeling the warmth of Tara's skin through the thin fabric of the blue hospital gown. "I'm not angry with you," she said. Her voice filled with pain and loss as she continued, "But I was so afraid of losing you..." Only in her mind did Willow complete the sentence with the final word again.

Hesitantly, Tara wrapped her arms around Willow's slender form. Willow froze at the initial contact, unaccustomed to being touched, then relaxed and let herself be pulled down to sit on the bed beside Tara. Tara hugged her friend tightly, resting her head on Willow's shoulder. She murmured softly into Willow's ear, "I'm sorry."

Willow enclosed Tara in her own arms, letting her head rest on Tara's warm shoulder. She had wanted this for so long. She had carried a tremendous burden of anger and grief all those years alone and this was the first time she could put it down, and let herself feel safe and secure in someone's arms. Even through the leather she wore she could feel Tara's heart beating strongly against her chest. Everything would be all right as long as she could feel that.

Tara didn't know what Willow was feeling, but she could tell that her friend needed this deeply. She tightened her arms around Willow. Truth be told, she needed this as well. It had been the most frightening night of her life. If it hadn't been for Willow, that horrifying spectre would have killed all of them. As Willow hugged her ever more closely, Tara sighed contently, feeling cherished and safe.

Finally, stiff and protesting muscles demanded that they move. They slowly broke the embrace and sat on the bed looking into each other's eyes for a moment without speaking.

Tara finally broke the silence. "Since you're safety gal, what about meeting someplace other than the graveyard?" she asked. "Would you want to go for coffee?"

Willow's eyes widened in consternation. She didn't do public places. She was much more at home in the desolate places of the night. Willow certainly felt more comfortable meeting Tara in the graveyard than in a coffee shop. She understood that her feelings weren't healthy, but she couldn't easily change them after 19 years spent away from the places where normal people lived and worked.

"I'm not much for public places," Willow demurred, looking down to avoid Tara's eyes. "Their proprietors get all cranky the first time you destroy a demon on the premises like it was your fault that it was there..."

Tara ducked her head, letting her fall forward to shield her face in her habitual defense mechanism, but not before Willow could see the sudden disappointment in her eyes. "It's okay," she said, without looking at Willow. Her voice was dull, completely without inflection. "I understand."

"I-" Willow began then closed her mouth as she didn't know what to say. After a few minutes of awkward silence in which neither girl looked at the other, Willow tried to make her explanations to Tara again. "I'm sorry, Tara," she said, reaching over to touch her friend on the shoulder. "I'm not used to ... It was so sudden. I didn't know how to react. I mean..."

Tara looked up, blonde tresses falling away from eyes in which hope was rising. "Does that mean you want to go?"

Willow relented, her desire to see Tara outweighing all her apprehensions about public places. "Yes," she said with a bright smile. "How about tomorrow?"

She knew that she had to see Tara in the light. If they were going to have a relationship, it couldn't be limited to the shadows of the dark places she'd haunted all these years. Ready or not, she had to venture into the world of ordinary life.

Of course, Willow wasn't ready. She needed time to prepare. It was going to be a busy day tomorrow. She didn't have any clothes other than the type she was wearing now. She needed something nicer for a date. Was it a date?

Tara smiled happily. "Oh," she said. "It's tomorrow already." Then she yawned widely. "I guess I'm still tired from all the excitement."

Willow was disappointed to end their conversation here, but they had tomorrow. "Do you want me to go?" she asked.

"No," Tara said, shaking her head. "No, I'd like to have someone here, that is if you won't be too bored." She really didn't want to be in the hospital all alone.

"I'm staying," Willow said with a firm look that brooked no contradiction.

Tara laid her head down on Willow's thigh, wishing she could sleep like this. Hospitals gave her nightmares since her mother got sick. Willow reached down to softly stroke her long blonde hair. Tara sighed contentedly, snuggling closer to Willow.

Willow understood what Tara wanted so she pulled herself fully on to the bed, careful to not disturb Tara's head in her lap. Tara looked up at Willow, her blue eyes questioning. "It's okay," Willow said, smiling down at her. "Go to sleep. I'll ward off any nightmares." She continued to run her fingers through Tara's silken hair.

Willow smiled as she looked at Tara and thought about how this was a reflection of their past. Then Tara had maintained a vigil over her sleep after Buffy's death, before Willow had brought the slayer back to life. Willow had tried to hide her recurring nightmares of Buffy's plunge from the tower, ashamed that she hadn't been able to do something to stop it, but Tara had known. She stayed awake night after night so that she could awaken Willow before she was sucked into the sludgy morass of guilt and fear of her nightmare. That had broken the cycle and she had been able to sleep peacefully again with Tara at her side.

Willow watched as Tara's blue eyes fluttered softly closed and the blonde's breathing took on the regular rhythm of sleep. Once she was certain that Tara was asleep, she bent down and softly kissed her on the forehead. She felt happier than she had in years as she watched Tara asleep in her lap.

Continued...

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