Late Season 7. The gang decides to play a little game that reveals more about them then they ever wanted to share.
Categories: Comedy fics Characters:
1 by Moluvsnumber17
This was just a short fic I came up with.
In less than a week they would be facing immortal danger unlike any they had faced before. They would be expected to be at their strongest. There was also a good chance that not everyone would make it. The potential slayers were not ready and everyone knew it. There was a great need for preparation. And yet, playing truth or dare was so much more exciting.
“I dare you to take off all your clothes and do your sexy dance.”
Xander’s eyes widened. “I am not taking off my clothes. No nudity, remember? We agreed before the game that everyone would keep their clothes on. Besides, I have no sexy dance.”
“That’s not what Anya said.”
Xander looked at the woman sitting beside him. She smiled and shrugged.
“What? Girls like to talk about stuff like that,” she said.
“No,” Buffy told her, “mostly only you.”
“Faith, pick another dare,” Dawn said.
The slayer made a face. How lame were these people? You can’t play truth or dare without nudity. It wasn’t right.
“Fine. I dare you to…kiss Spike.”
“Hell no,” Spike said. “I'm not kissing him.”
“That’s even worse,” Xander complained, “Is there a no kissing rule? There should be a no kissing rule.”
“We didn’t instate a no kissing rule,” Willow said.
“Well, I'm instating one right now. No kissing vampires in this game.”
“Fine by me,” Spike said.
“We better keep an eye on Buffy then,” Dawn said.
Buffy glared at her sister. “Dawn!”
“You’re the one with the track record.”
The game had been going on for over an hour. The gang had decided they needed to have a little fun on one of their last nights before God only knew what would happen. After the potentials had been tucked away, they had come downstairs. Giles had declined the invitation to participate in their childish games, saying that someone should keep an eye on the girls. Kennedy, Dawn, and Andrew had also earned themselves a spot in the game after much begging. Buffy had insisted Dawn shouldn’t be exposed to whatever games Faith came up with, but the teenager had won the fight.
The ten of them sat in a circle on the basement floor. When truth or dare had been suggested, Buffy had been against it. She had hated the game since she’d been forced to kiss Anthony Weaver in the 5th grade. Willow had also not been so crazy about the idea at first, but Kennedy had talked her into it.
“Maybe we should play a different game,” Robin suggested, “One that doesn’t involve things that would give us all nightmares.”
“Good idea,” Xander agreed.
Faith rolled her eyes. “Sissies.”
“You’re telling me you would have no problem kissing anyone in this room?” Buffy asked her.
Faith glanced around the circle. “Nope. In fact, I think I would enjoy most of em.”
Buffy rolled her eyes. She should have expected an answer like that.
“I have an idea,” Faith said. “Let’s play 20 questions. But we’ll make it…interesting. We’ll let Dawn ask all the questions.”
“Sex?” Buffy asked.
“Yes. Dawnie is interested, and I’d say between the eight of us, we could give some helpful advice.”
“There’s nine of us.”
“Andrew doesn’t count.”
“Hey,” Andrew protested. “What makes you think I don’t have any cool sex stories to tell?”
“Do you?” Faith asked him.
“My point exactly.”
He crossed his arms and huffed dramatically in defeat.
“It’s okay,” Dawn told him, patting him on the shoulder. “Maybe you can pick up some helpful hints, too. You can even help me ask questions.”
He seemed to perk up at that. “Okay.”
“This’ll be fun,” Dawn said.
“I don’t know, Faith. Maybe we shouldn’t be sharing such…intimate details,” Willow said. Truth or dare had been bad enough, but this? This was like truth or dare without the dare. Reveal all about what and who you’ve done.
“Oh come on. It won’t be that bad. And we won’t go into the raunchy details. Some things are better left to the imagination.”
Buffy wasn’t crazy about this game either. Revealing details about her sex life was not high on her list of things to do today. “I'm with Willow. I think I'm gonna sit this one out.”
“Me too,” Spike said quickly. Sure games such as this could be fun and sometimes entertaining, but he had a feeling this one would just make everyone uncomfortable.
“No. No one is sitting out. We are all playing.”
“Faith’s right,” Kennedy said. “It won’t hurt us to share some secrets.”
“I'm in,” Anya chirped.
“Me too,” Robin said. He had to admit he was curious about some of the people in this room. More specifically Buffy and the vampire seated beside her. He’d heard briefly about their relationship but didn’t know how serious it had been. And though he was no longer interested in Buffy, his curiosity about her had grown.
“I guess I’ll play,” Xander said. “As long as the rules from the former game are re-instated.”
“I think we can handle that. So?” Faith said, looking at the three unwilling participants.
Spike was the first to give in, shrugging a why not. Willow sighed and agreed as well. Everyone looked at Buffy.
“Alright, alright, I’ll play.”
The other slayer smiled. “Okay. So here’s the deal; Dawn will ask the question and then we’ll go around the circle, and everyone can answer it. You can start with me,” Faith said.
Dawn looked around the circle; Faith, Robin, Xander, Anya, Kennedy, Willow, Spike, Buffy, herself, and Andrew.
‘This should be interesting,’ she thought.
“Okay, first question. We’ll keep it simple. How many people have you slept with?”
Faith started counting on her fingers. “I'm gonna go with somewhere around nine.”
Everyone looked at Anya.
“What? I’ve been alive for over a thousand years.”
“A thousand years and all you got is 27?” Faith asked.
“I may have been a demon, but I was choosy about my men.”
“Moving on,” Dawn said looking at Kennedy.
“Are we talking male/female sex or any kind?”
Dawn shrugged. “Any kind, I guess.”
“Really?” Faith asked.
Everyone else seemed to be shocked by this as well. Buffy couldn’t believe he had slept with only one more person than her. She thought for sure he would say something like ‘I lost track after 30’. How could Spike, the man who seemed to know more about her body than she did, master of the bedroom, have been with only five women? But the real question was, who was this fifth woman? There had been Drusilla, Harmony, Anya, and her of course. But who else? Surely he wasn’t counting the robot.
“Yeah. I'm not just gonna shag anyone.”
“Buffy?” Dawn asked.
“Seems Anya has the record on that one. Though, she is millenniums older than the rest of us.”
Dawn though a moment. “Umm…Where was the last place you had sex?”
“Bed,” Faith replied, disappointed that she didn’t have a better answer.
“Lame,” Dawn said. “What about you, Xander?”
“Kitchen floor,” he said uncertainly.
“What?” Buffy asked. “My kitchen floor?”
He nodded and attempted a smile.
“You had sex on my kitchen floor?”
Dawn ignored her sister and went to Anya, who responded with the same answer.
“Looks like they’re winning,” she said.
“Since when is this a game? Buffy demanded.
Again she was ignored.
“Bed. Though, if we’re talking sex with a guy…shower.”
Spike had not been looking forward to answering this question. He knew that his answer would only bother most of the people in this room.
“Table,” he said.
Buffy made a face. As much as she hated to admit it, the thought of Spike and Anya together still bothered her. Xander’s faced showed a similar emotion. He had still not been able to get that picture of Spike on top of Anya out of his head. Dawn noticed the tension and decided to move the game along.
“Almost as good as kitchen floor, but not quite. How about you, Buffy?”
The slayer looked around at everyone. They were all waiting to hear what she had to say.
“I…uhh…this is stupid. What are you really learning from hearing us talk about where the last place we had sex was? How about we play another game now?”
“Oh, no, no, you have to answer,” Faith said. “We all did, it’s only fair that you do, too.”
She took a breath and cast a sideways glance at Spike.
“Fine.” She paused another moment before answering. “Sarcophagus,” she said quietly.
“Sarcophagus,” she said a little louder.
“Still didn’t hear you.”
“Sarcophagus,” she practically screamed.
“Inside one?” Faith asked, half shocked, half impressed.
They were all still looking at her, and most glancing at Spike as well. It seemed that it was no secret he was the last person she had been with.
“That’s pretty kinky, B.”
“Can we get on with this?” Buffy asked impatiently, tired of the way they were all looking at her.
“Yeah,” Dawn said, noticing her sister’s discomfort. “Oh, I know. Have you ever been tied up?”
“Now we’re getting good. And yes I have.”
“Not so much.”
Again Buffy hesitated. “Yes.”
Dawn was slightly shocked at her sister’s answer, but didn’t say anything. They would talk about it later.
“I’ve heard angry sex is really good. Is that true?”
“Depends. But I’d say yeah.”
“I agree with Faith.”
“I really wouldn’t know.”
Spike nodded. “Sometimes.”
“Buffy?” Dawn asked.
“It can be,” she admitted. “But don’t think that means you should have angry sex.”
Dawn smiled at her sister. “I don’t. At least not until I’ve had happy sex. Anyway…umm…have you ever had a one night stand?”
“Plenty of em.”
Dawn nodded. “Have you ever had more than one one night stand?”
“I think I already answered that.”
Xander shook his head no.
“I have. It’s that way with a lot of demons. They get too attached.” Off of the looks she received, “Well, they do.”
“No,” Spike said, again shocking people in the room.
“You’ve never had more than one one night stand? You’re like 100,” Faith said.
“Closer to 150, but no. Only once,” he said with a slight glance at Anya. The look went unnoticed by Faith, but not by Buffy, Xander, or Dawn.
“Just full of surprises, aren’t you?”
He smirked slightly in response.
“I haven’t either,” Buffy said to finish up this round.
“I’ve had one,” Andrew said suddenly. It had been killing him to keep quiet this long.
Nine sets of eyes stared at him skeptically.
“Really?” Dawn asked.
“Ummm…well, not exactly. But I wanna play, too.”
“Fine. You ask a question.”
“Okay. Who’s done it with chicks and dudes?”
Willow, Kennedy, and Anya raised their hands.
“I can’t believe you wasted a question. I could have told you that,” Dawn said. “How about, how many of you have been caught in the act?”
Faith, Anya, Kennedy, Spike, and Buffy all raised their hands.
“You were caught?” Dawn asked Buffy. “I mean, I know I came in on you and Riley making out once, but you weren’t doing it.”
“No. It wasn’t Riley.” Her glance at Spike didn’t go unnoticed.
“Someone caught you guys?”
“What? It’s not like everyone here doesn’t already know the two of you used to have sex all the time.”
Buffy was ready to kill her sister. Spike; however, was confused.
“What are you talking about?” he asked Buffy. “When were we caught?”
She looked uncomfortable again. “You know.” She didn’t really wanna say it out loud.
He shook his head. “I don’t…” He broke off, racking his brain.
“When I was…invisible,” she said the last part rather quietly.
“Invis…oh. Bloody hell. I remember. How could I forget that?”
Buffy smiled despite herself. It had been rather humorous at the time, watching him squirm.
“When you were invisible?” Dawn asked loudly. “Who could have caught you when you were invisible? No one could see you.”
“Well, they didn’t see me.”
“But…that doesn’t make sense.”
All eyes went to Xander.
“Oh God no. No no no no.”
“What is it?” Anya asked.
He looked from Buffy to Spike. “That was…you were…but…exercising…”
Buffy laughed nervously.
“Oh,” he said again.
“It was you, wasn’t it?” Dawn asked. “You caught them?”
“I guess I did. But I didn’t know it…until now.”
“You walked in on Spike and thought he was what?” Faith asked.
Xander shrugged. “Lonely?”
That earned a few laughs except from Spike.
“Teach you to barge in without knocking.”
Xander made a face, the image of Spike humping the bed fresh in his mind. Only, as it turns out, he wasn’t humping the bed. He was humping…Buffy.
“This game just keeps getting better,” Kennedy said.
“You got that right,” Faith said. “How bout another question?”
“K. Umm…have you ever had a threesome?”
“Well, you guys are lame. Except you two,” she said to Faith and Anya.
“After a few hundred years you get adventurous,” Anya said.
“Right. How many of you have had sex outside?”
Everyone raised their hand except Willow.
“Who’s had sex in a car?”
Every hand went up this time.
“I’ve got another one,” Andrew said. “And it’s good.”
“Okay then,” Dawn said.
“Who here has pleasured themselves?”
Again, every hand went up.
“That’s it. No more questions from you,” Dawn said.
Andrew crossed his arms and sulked.
“I have a good one. Who here has orally pleasured someone else?”
All hands went up aside from Robin.
“You’ve never done that?”
He shook his head.
“Well, I have a thing or two to teach you.”
He looked slightly embarrassed by her statement, but managed to reply. “I'm looking forward to it.”
“Next question,” Anya said. “I'm getting into this.”
Dawn cracked a smile. “Okay. Have you ever had sex in public?”
“More than once.”
Anya nodded a yes.
Again Dawn was shocked at her sister’s answer, but again said nothing.
“For those of you that said yes, where?”
“Mall, restaurant, movies…you name it.”
“The market place, the Renaissance festival…”
“Oh yes. And it was harder than you think to have sex with one of those dresses on.”
“I imagine. Spike?”
“Allies, bars, clubs, trains, the leaning tower of Pisa.”
“The leaning tower of Pisa?”
“Yeah, why do you think it’s leaning?”
That earned him a few laughs and a snicker from Buffy.
“What about you, sis?”
“You know, some of those places.”
Faith had to admit she was impressed. Turns out Buffy wasn’t quite the tightly wound girl she remembered.
“Was it exciting? Doing it where people could see you?”
“Hell yes. The fear of getting caught is like fuel to the fire.”
“I have to agree,” Anya said.
Spike nodded to say he agreed as well.
“I guess it can be,” Buffy said, trying not to think about that night on the balcony, where she’d been watching her friends dance while Spike carried her over the edge.
“What about makeup sex? Is it as good as everyone says?”
Robin nodded yes.
Buffy nodded a yes, too.
That was something they could all agree on. Makeup sex did tend to be amazing.
“I have a question,” Andrew said.
“No,” Dawn said.
“But it’s a good one this time. I promise.”
“Alright. But this is your last chance.”
“Don’t worry,” he said confidently. “My question is how many people in this room have slept with someone else in this room?”
Everyone raised their hands.
“We knew that Andrew.”
“Okay, how many people in this room have slept with more than one other person in this room?”
Buffy, Willow Robin, and Kennedy all put their hands down. Robin looked at Faith, and she pointed at Xander.
“You two slept together?”
“She took his virginity,” Anya told him.
“Doesn’t mean you have to broadcast it.”
“And you with Spike?” Faith asked the ex-demon. She was really curious now. Anya and Spike had slept together. She wondered when that had occurred.
“Yeah, last year after Xander left me at the alter. Spike was depressed because Buffy dumped him and we got drunk and had sex.”
Spike coughed and Faith looked at him.
She noticed the other slayer looked none to happy about the current topic. Jealous was she?
“So she was your one and only one night stand?”
“Can we not talk about this?” Xander asked, annoyed.
“Why not? It happened. And clearly it meant nothing to either of them, so you and Buffy can chill. You’re still their favorites.”
Xander and Buffy looked at each other, both making faces. Why did Faith always have to do that?
“Okay okay,” Dawn said, trying to ease the tension. “Look, I have one question left.”
“She’s right,” Willow said. “So we’ll let her ask it and then we’re done with discussing our sex lives…forever.”
“Alright, what’s it gonna be?” Faith asked.
Dawn thought for a moment. What would be the perfect question to end the game?
“I’ve got it.”
The perfect question.
“Who gave you the best sex you’ve ever had?”
By the looks on their faces, they had not expected it, and Dawn smiled, proud of herself.
Faith was first and had to think long and hard about it. “Sorry Robin, but I'm gonna have to say Charles Henderson. He was this dude I met back when I was in Nevada for a while. He was flexible and bendy in all the right places. Best weekend ever.”
“Despite the fact that she dissed me, if I'm honest, I'm gonna have to say Faith. I’ve never experienced…muscles…quite like yours before.”
“Powers of a slayer, baby. And there’s more where that came from.”
“Moving right along…” Dawn said looking to Xander to stop her from continuing.
Anya smiled. “Really? I'm better than a slayer?”
“Hey! I'm offended by that.”
“And just so you know,” Xander continued. “This doesn’t mean that you have to say me. I mean, with 26 other contestants, I'm sure one of them was really flexible or strong or something.”
“I know, and you’re right. I’ve had some good ones. But…you are the best. And not just because I love you. But because you can make me orgasm five times a night, and because you always take my direction so well, and because you know just how to find my sensitive spot, and…”
“I think we get the picture,” Kennedy interrupted.
“You really mean that?” Xander asked.
He smiled, obviously proud of himself.
“Well, I'm gonna say Kaylee Jackson. She was this girl I met in Spain. Sorry, Willow, but she rocked my world.”
A part of Kennedy had wanted to say Willow, but another part of her knew that Willow would feel obligated to say her, even if she really wanted to say something else.
“Willow?” Dawn asked.
“Tara,” she said somewhat sadly. “She was surprisingly frisky.”
The earned a few smiles and laughs.
All eyes moved onto Spike then. As if they didn’t already know what he would say.
He sighed, wondering what was the right thing to do. He opted for the truth. “Don’t act surprised when you hear this, but…Buffy.”
“Never would have guessed,” Dawn said with a laugh.
And then it was her turn. Everyone stared at Buffy. Hers would quite possibly be the most interesting answer. Mostly because no one knew for sure what she would say. Probably not Parker. But that left three men, all whom they knew were important to her. So the question was, who exactly was the best she’d ever had?
Buffy contemplated this. Angel had been her first time. And it had been amazing. Sweet and tender. Parker had been a mistake, but the sex had still been good. Riley satisfied her needs most of the time, and Spike… Well, sex with him had been nothing short of incredible. But who had been the best?
Anticipation was clearly building in the room, but what the hell was she going to say?
‘Come on,’ they seemed to be saying. ‘Out with it.’
And she knew. She knew the answer when they’d first asked. Who was the best she’d ever had? It was quite obvious. She’d been a child with Angel. Parker had been good but not great. And Riley…like she’d said…had only satisfied her most of the time. But there was someone who satisfied her each and every time. And kept her coming back for what she could never deny that she wanted.
“Spike.” The words left her mouth before she had a chance to argue the consequences with herself.
The vampire looked shocked at first. He’d half expected her to say Peaches and half expected her to say Captain Cardboard. But not him. And maybe on some level he knew that’s how she really felt, but he never thought she would admit that to her friends.
Dawn was smiling from ear to ear, clearly pleased with the answer, which didn’t make it any easier for Buffy.
“Well, this has been fun. And quite revealing,” Faith said. “But it’s late and even I'm tired. And kinda horny.”
“Me too,” Anya said, looking at Xander. “I bet that kitchen floor’s available.”
“So not available,” Buffy said.
Laughs erupted from the group as they all began getting up from the floor and headed for the stairs.
“You know, I actually think we could learn a thing or two from Anya and Faith,” Kennedy said. “I don’t think they answered no to anything.”
“Yeah,” Willow said, though it was clear she had no intention of ever doing that.
“How bout we steal a bedroom?” Xander asked Anya. “Let someone else have the kitchen.”
She looped her arm through his. “I'm all for that.”
Xander smiled and led her up the stairs.
“So you really think I'm the best?” Spike asked Buffy.
She looked over at him. He had that annoying smirk plastered on his face.
“I have to go upstairs now.”
She started climbing but he followed her, laughing lightly to himself. Robin followed close after them.
“So what do you think?” Faith asked Dawn. “Did you learn anything?”
“I think I have definitely learned more than I ever wanted to know.”
The slayer laughed and followed her up the stairs.
“That was the plan.”
Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters and settings are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. No money is being made from this work. No copyright infringement is intended.