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05/18/17 04:16 am
pj! I remember wishing one of your stories would be finished seriously about a decade ago. Amazing. I just tried an old password I used to use and amazingly got in too. Memories!
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10 yrs later, i finally rem my username and password. Pari, you rock. Hope you are well.
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Great post.
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08/31/16 03:43 pm
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Author's Corner

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Authors Chapter Notes:
Sorry this took a long time, my beta returned the chapters to me a while ago but I've only just got around to going through them. *guilty grin* Next update will be sooner, and I'm also starting a couple more stories soon and updating Misfits.

Chapter Two: Reading Material

Spike inserted the Queen CD and started playing with the volume. As the first few bars of the first track began, he replaced the box, dislodging what looked like a personal organiser.

“Hey, reading material. I like this guy.”

“Spike! Put that back!”

“If he wanted to keep it private he shouldn’t leave it lying about where anyone can just –”

A piece of paper fell out of the organiser. Spike took one look at it and raised his eyebrows. “Dated this guy long, have you?”

“His name is Parker and it’s none of your business.”

Spike didn’t reply for a moment, reading the paper. “Actually, I think it is my business. I don’t want a depressed, heartbroken Slayer on my hands. You won’t be able to focus on helping me.”

“What are you talking about?”

Spike dropped the paper and rifled through the organiser. Buffy tried not to look, knowing that taking her eyes off the road would be a very bad idea. “Bloody hell, Parker gets around. Hey, you’re marked down for tomorrow.”

“What? Are you sure? We don’t have anything arranged for tomorrow -”

“It’s the fourteenth today, isn’t it? You’re down for the fifteenth. It just says ‘Buffy’.” Spike flipped a couple of weeks back. “And there’s a Jemima ticked off. And -” he went further back “Alice, Kate, Emily – Barely a fortnight between them. Wow, what a life.”

It was extremely lucky that there was no one coming either way, that that particular stretch of road was relatively dry due to the overhanging trees, and that there were no bends or obstacles, as Buffy’s resolve ran out. She applied the brakes hard and suddenly. Spike, not having a seatbelt on, nearly went through the windscreen. “Bloody hell, woman!”

“Give me that.” Buffy snatched the organiser once the car was at a standstill.

It was just as Spike had said. Buffy thumbed through the entire diary, while Spike rummaged in the glove compartment again. It was filled with girls’ names. Flipping forward two weeks from her entry, her mouth fell open as she saw ‘Willow’ written clearly in the middle of the week.

For a few moments she just sat there staring. It had to be a mistake. But the handwriting was distinctively Parker’s.

Of all the -

“Er … Buffy?”

Buffy barely registered Spike’s use of her actual name. “What?”

“You might want to see this other stuff.”

The piece of paper that had fallen out of the organiser was a list of students that Parker had obviously printed, some of the girls highlighted. The list was annotated, with comments such as ‘Good for a second time’ or ‘Too clingy’. His wallet was in the glove compartment as well, and hidden in one of the pockets was a photo of Buffy – or, to be more precise, Buffy’s head attached to a porn picture cut from a magazine.

The low-down, disgusting, using pervert!

Buffy noticed Spike pocket the thirty dollars cash that were in the wallet, and didn’t bother telling him off. She herself felt like committing some sort of violent act. Instead, she dropped Parker’s possessions on the floor, grasped the steering-wheel firmly and pressed hard on the accelerator.

Spike swore again as he was thrown backwards in his seat. “Do you have a death wish or something? I thought I was a dangerous driver.” He paused. Buffy was staring straight ahead, her knuckles white on the wheel. The needle of the speedometer was moving steadily up. A bend was approaching.

“For goodness’ sake Slayer, slow down! You’re no use dead.” The bend was getting nearer. Spike pushed Buffy roughly into the car door and slammed on the brakes himself.

“Ouch!” Buffy punched him in the face. Spike ducked a second blow, rubbing his nose.

“Feel better?” he enquired.

If looks could kill, Spike would have been dust. “Just put that stuff back. And shut up.”

As Spike replaced the organiser and wallet, Buffy closed her eyes and took several deep breaths. Men. Finally she opened them, and her heart sank. “Oh, crap.”

Buffy reluctantly wound down the window as the police officer approached. “Can I see your licence, Ma’am?”

“It’s three AM and I’m in my pyjamas,” Buffy exploded. “Do I look like I have my damn licence?”

“Sorry, Officer,” Spike said quickly. “She’s just pissed off because she just found out her boyfriend is a user.”

“Oh, thanks, Spike,” Buffy muttered sarcastically.

“Have you been drinking?”

“She hasn’t, it’s just me,” Spike insisted.

“Still, if you can’t show me a licence, I’m afraid I’m going to have to ask you to come with -”

As he spoke, Spike got out of the car and walked around. Buffy heard a scuffle followed by eerie silence, and he got back in calmly.


“What did you do?”

“Relax, I didn’t kill him.” A glint in appeared in his eyes as he glanced back. “Tempting though, I haven’t eaten in a while.”

“I’m calling an ambulance,” Buffy muttered, pulling out her phone. Spike put a hand on hers as she started dialling.

“Use his phone. You can’t be traced then.”

Buffy hesitated. “Oh. Good idea.”

A few minutes later, Buffy started the car again. Spike turned the music up and she tried to concentrate on the words, to avoid thinking about Parker or the fact that they had left an unconscious police officer behind or that the person singing along to the music was a vampire she was supposed to decide whether to help or kill.

“Spike, either sing in tune or don’t sing at all,” she finally snapped. He glared at her, but stopped.

After a few moments, Spike looked back at her. He had been staring at her for at least a minute before Buffy said impatiently, “What?”

“Nice pyjamas, Slayer.”

“Shut up.”

She had forgotten she was only wearing a sweatshirt over her yummy sushi pyjamas. Still, Spike probably wasn’t going to go and tell the entire demon world what she wore at night. He would most likely never admit he had gone to her for help.

“So,” she broke the silence again. “Tell me about this … Cado Lamb.”

“Caedo Lamia.”

“Yeah, that.”

Spike sighed. “I don’ really know how it works. I just know it’s lethal.” He glanced at her. “And bloody painful.”

“Really?” Buffy said mildly. “Any more information would be helpful.”

“I think it started as a curse. Only it’s an illness – like a plague.”

“Is it contagious?” Buffy asked warily.

“Highly.” Spike saw her expression. “To vampires. You’re human, you’re safe.”

“Good to know.”

“And I think demons can catch a different type … So, basically, one demon gets it, and the rest push them away to avoid getting it too.” His voice turned bitter. “Even Dru.”

Buffy wasn’t sure how to respond to that and silence fell. No wonder Spike had come to her for help. No demon would go near him. She felt a stab of pity for him.

It dissipated a moment later when he, obviously trying to change the subject, said, “What are you going to do about this boyfriend of yours then?”

“I – None of your business!” Buffy had momentarily forgotten about Parker and resented Spike for reminding her. “Break up with him, I suppose.”

“That’s it?” Spike raised his eyebrows.

“Well, what would you suggest?” Buffy asked, before suddenly wishing she hadn’t.

“Oh, I don’t know … something creative.” Spike ran a finger over the dashboard thoughtfully. “It’s a nice car. You could drive it into a lamp-post.”

“Now, see, this is what separates me from your type,” Buffy said firmly. “I’m not going to deliberately damage Parker’s car, no matter how much he deserves it. It’s not right. It’s not up to me to decide.”

Spike shrugged. “Fine. I’m sure he’ll get the message and learn his lesson if you just talk to him. Because guys like that just love to listen.”

She ignored his sarcasm and let out a sigh of relief when she saw a familiar sign pointing them towards home. “We’re nearly there.”


The atmosphere was awkward, and Buffy kept her eyes firmly on the road. What he’d said about teaching Parker a lesson actually made some sense, but she was determined not to let him know she thought that. Neither of them spoke until, at last, Buffy pulled up in front of her mother’s house.

It was completely dark. Joyce was obviously asleep. Buffy went to check her pockets for her keys and remembered she was in her pyjamas. “Damn!”

“You’re joking,” Spike said flatly.

There was no way she was driving all the way back to college with Spike in tow to get her keys. And she didn’t want to wake her mother. Buffy was deliberating when Spike solved the problem for her by breaking the lock.

“Spike! You’re paying for that!” she hissed furiously.

“What? I’m tired, and I didn’ want to wake your mum.”

“How considerate,” Buffy muttered. “Just go in.”

Spike was already inside, having been invited before. Buffy told him to be quiet and closed the door behind her. She would have to get him to wedge it shut behind her with something when she left. She paused. That would be tricky, as she had planned to chain him in the basement. She would have to rethink that one.

“Go down there. I’ll be down in a minute,” she whispered, directing him towards the basement. He opened the door and started down the stairs. Buffy wedged the back door shut from the inside, and fetched the spare front door key so she could leave once she had sorted Spike out. Then, thinking that she ought to give him something other than a cold floor to lie on, removed the cushions from the sofa and a spare blanket from the cupboard and ventured downstairs.

To her surprise, Spike was already in the shackles. He looked up and tossed her the key. “You took your time.”

“Do you want these or not?” She showed him his ‘bedding’.

“Yes,” he said quickly, before adding, “Please.”

A few minutes later, Spike was falling asleep in the makeshift bed. It still didn’t look particularly comfortable to Buffy, but he didn’t seem to mind the manacles too much. He just seemed grateful she hadn’t staked him the moment she saw him.

Buffy left him to it, returned upstairs and wrote a note to her mother.

Hi, Mom -

Spike asked me for help last night. He’s in the basement. DO NOT unchain him, or go within biting distance. He says he wouldn’t bite you anyway because he likes you, but I’m not taking any chances. He’ll probably sleep all day anyway. I’ve got classes in the morning so I have to go but I’ll drop by later. If I decide to help him, I’ll stop at the butcher’s on the way back.


PS: Spike was the one who broke the lock. I’ve told him he’s going to pay for a new one.


Buffy was almost falling asleep by the time she arrived back at college. There was a ditch running alongside the car park, and it was filled with rainwater. Buffy paused after turning the engine off, remembering what Spike had said.

Oh, to hell with it.

Buffy turned the key again, and manoeuvred the car right by the ditch. She gathered up the organiser and other bits and pieces, noticed that the Queen CD was missing – probably in the same place as Parker’s cash – and turned off the car engine, but left the brakes off.

There was something very satisfying about pushing his car into the water. It was almost up to the windows. Suddenly feeling a lot better, Buffy returned to her room.


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