She says she's no good with words but I'm worse
Barely stuttered out
"A joke of a romantic" or stuck to my tongue
Weighed down with words too over-dramatic
Tonight it's "it can't get much worse"
Vs. "no one should ever feel like.."
I'm two quarters and a heart down
And I don't want to forget how your voice sounds
These words are all I have so I'll write them
So you need them just to get by…
Listening to the sounds of Fall Out Boy’s “Dance Dance” that the DJ had put on while the live band was taking a break, Buffy Summers sat at the bar of the local club, sadly twirling a straw in her rum and coke, not drinking it, just looking down at the dark-colored liquid. She didn’t go there to get drunk. No… just to think.
You always fold just before you're found out
Drink up its last call
Last resort
But only the first mistake and I…
With a slight laugh at the words to that part of the song, Buffy picked up her drink and took a sip of it. Satisfied with the slight burn that the rum caused in her throat, she allowed herself to think about the day’s previous events. The ones that eventually caused her trip to the bar to drown her sorrows…
~~~~~
The two girls laughed at the joke Buffy had just said as they walked into the bar. Knowing Buffy’s boyfriend Spike would be out for the night, Willow had called and asked if she wanted to go out for a “girls’ night” type of thing with just the two of them. With both of them having jobs and boyfriends, they liked to spend time together but didn’t really get much of a chance to just hang out by themselves lately.
“This is fun. Starting to remind me of high school, when we’d be here almost every night,” Willow said with a grin. “Dancing and drinks!”
Buffy laughed. “Yeah, except now the drinks are legal,” she joked. “But it’s still not the same without Xander here… Trying to dance with every girl on the floor and getting shot down miserably.”
Willow laughed. “Buffy! Be nice!” she said playfully as they both sat down at the bar and ordered their drinks.
After a couple drinks and just sitting and talking with each other like they used to in high school, they decided to head to the dance floor for a while.
At first, neither one of them noticed Spike on the other side of the room. The person he was with couldn’t clearly be seen. That was until they got closer. Willow was the first one to see.
Seeing the look on her friend’s face, Buffy’s smile dropped. “Wills? What’s wrong?”
Willow didn’t say anything; instead, she just kept looking ahead and shook her head with a disappointed look on her face, which worried Buffy. She looked in the direction of her friend’s gaze, and that’s when she saw what caught Willow’s attention.
Her boyfriend. With Faith LeHane. Faith rubbing all over her boyfriend and Spike not doing anything about it. Narrowing her eyes, Buffy angrily pushed through the crowd of people until she made her way to the other side where Spike and Faith were, Willow doing her best to keep up with Buffy’s fast stride.
“What the hell is this?” Buffy practically yelled as she finally reached the table.
Spike seemed shocked to see her there, and Faith looked at her with a small smile. “Hey, B.”
“Buffy? What’re you doing here?” he asked but then looked between her and Faith and quickly stood up, distancing himself from the brunette. “It’s not what it looks like, I swear. I can explain. She came on to me!”
“Damn right, you can explain!” Buffy yelled. “And it didn’t look like you were doing anything to stop her!”
“Buffy listen, luv- you walked up here just as soon as she started to come on to me. I was going to push her away!” he tried to explain, but it was for nothing because she was already heading out of the club, leaving him to follow after her.
~~~~~
Frowning at the memory of the fight she had had with her boyfriend Spike Allister not even three hours ago, she downed her drink and got up from the bar. Buffy was going to take Fall Out Boy’s advice… and dance. Pushing through the crowd of people so she could get to the center of the dance floor, she joined everyone in dancing to the beat of the song.
Dance, Dance
We're falling apart to half time
Dance, Dance
And these are the lives you'd love to lead
Dance, this is the way they'd love
If they knew how misery loved me
You always fold just before you're found out
Drink up its last call
Last resort
But only the first mistake and I…
Closing her eyes, Buffy let the music flow over her and danced to the fast beat of the song. Ignoring the guys or occasional girl that approached her to try and snag some dance time, she let the dance relax her and give her mind a break from the painful memories.
~~~~
“It’s not my fault you let some skank rub all over you in front of Buffy… So if you just called me over here to brood about your little fight with Buffy… I’m going to go and have some fun,” Brink O’Reilly, Spike’s best friend, said as he sat in the comfy chair across from Spike.
Spike glared at his friend. “I don’t brood, and it was a bit more than a ‘little fight’, as you put it, Pinky.”
Brink mock-gasped. “Hey, don’t poke fun at the hair just ’cause you have a girl problem,” he said, pointing to his rather brightly-colored hot pink hair that was spiked up messily with black at the tips.
“How bout this… you and me go out, have some beers, and listen to a little music. No girls tonight… well at least not for you. I’m free game,” Brink said with a grin.
“I wouldn’t mind a beer and a game of pool ’bout now,” Spike said, not able to stifle his laughter at his friend.
That was the reason Spike liked Brink so much- he always knew how to take a bad situation and try and make it a little better by making him laugh.
“Great, let’s go!” he said happily and jumped out of the chair before heading to the door with Spike.
~~~~~
After dancing to several other songs, Buffy headed back to the bar so she could catch her breath and get something to drink before she went back out to the dance floor one last time before she headed home. She knew she had to face Spike sooner or later and get things straightened out- she just wanted to stay pissed at him a little bit longer.
Now that she wasn’t dancing, her mind was no longer relaxed and unable to think about the fight instead of just being lost in the words and the beat of the music. The rest of the fight played out in her mind as she went over the little details.
~~~~
“Bloody hell!” Spike muttered as yet another pillow was tossed at him. “Will you stop throwing things at me and let me talk?!”
Glaring at him, Buffy dropped her other pillow to the floor. “Talk about what?! How you let some hoe rub all over you tonight when you were just supposed to be going out with the guys?”
“I WAS out with the guys! I can’t help it that you chose to come check on me the exact same moment Faith decided to try and feel me up!”
She shook her head with an angry laugh. “What do you mean, checking on you? I didn’t know where you were going with the guys! Willow called and wanted to hang out for the night. And since you weren’t going to be home, I went to club with her for some drinks and dancing.”
Running a hand through his hair, he took a deep breath to calm himself down. “Oh, come off it, Buffy. You know as well as I do that since your last relationship wasn’t successful ‘cause the wanker cheated on you, you truly haven’t trusted me enough.”
Buffy sadly looked down, knowing he was right. She didn’t let him see the tears brimming in her eyes as she turned to grab her jacket and said, “Fine. If that’s how you feel about it… I’ll just leave you alone… Call one of the guys if you want. I’m going out.” She didn’t even give him a chance to reply to the comment before she was already out of the door and on her way.
Buffy knew Spike was probably right about trust issues- she didn’t really have a reason to not trust him. It was just… when she walked into the club and saw some other girl that was definitely not Buffy rubbing all over her boyfriend, she didn’t even think about the fact that Faith would sleep with anything that had two legs and a dick. She overreacted. But… she wasn’t going to admit that to him. At least not yet. She had a right to be angry because from the looks of it, Spike didn’t try and push Faith off him.
~~~~~
Brink sighed boredly as he leaned up against he pool table. He had only been able to shoot once, and as usual, Spike was running the table and not giving him much of a chance to win.
“You know what? While you play by yourself, I’m going to go get a refill,” he said, holding up the empty pitcher of beer.
Spike laughed at his friend’s anger over losing and watched him walk away to the bar before shooting the ball one more time and finally missing it. He waited for Brink to come back so he could go again.
While Brink was at the bar getting a refill, he noticed Buffy on the other side. Contemplating whether or not he should go over there and talk to her or not, he decided on the latter. She probably didn’t want him to mess around with something that was really none of his business.
When he got back to the pool table, he set the pitcher down beside Spike and whispered in unneeded discreetness, “Ook-lay at the ar-bay.”
Spike arched a brow and looked at him. “Maybe you shouldn’t drink anymore… ‘cause I have no idea what the bleeding hell you just said.”
Brink threw up his hands. “Fine! Don’t blame me for trying to be discreet! Look at the damn bar!” he said, pointing in Buffy’s direction.
Curiously, wondering what his friend was talking about, Spike looked in the direction of the bar and his eyes widened when he saw Buffy sitting there. When she said she was going to go out, he figured she was going to go over to Willow’s or one of her other friends’ places and talk about how much of an “ass” he was. He really didn’t expect her to be sitting at the bar sadly by herself.
After being silent for a second, he kept his eye on Buffy but said to Brink, “I’ve got an idea…”
~~~~~
“There’s going to be a little change of plan tonight. The band will still be playing… but there is going to be a different singer for a short time…” the DJ announced to the club.
Buffy didn’t pay any attention to the DJ’s words, partly because she was about to leave and partly because she didn’t really care. That was until she heard the next voice that came over the speakers.
“This one’s going to go out to a girl I know… See, I hurt her, not intentionally, but this is sort of an apology… and I hope it helps a little bit…”
She didn’t want to turn around because when she did, she knew she would be staring eye-to-eye with Spike. Buffy was doing just fine with keeping her back to him as the band started the beginning chords to the song. But when he started singing, that’s when she knew she had to turn around. And when she did… she was right- she was looking into the apologetic eyes of Spike as he sang.
“Desperate for changing
Starving for truth
I'm closer to where I started
Chasing after you
I'm falling even more in love with you
Letting go of all I've held onto
I'm standing here until you make me move
I'm hanging by a moment here with you
Forgetting all I'm lacking
Completely incomplete
I'll take your invitation
You take all of me now...”
Buffy felt her eyes start to tear up as she listened to the words. She couldn’t help but give him a small smile, letting him know that indeed his plan was working, whether or not she liked it.
“I'm falling even more in love with you
Letting go of all I've held onto
I'm standing here until you make me move
I'm hanging by a moment here with you
I'm living for the only thing I know
I'm running and not quite sure where to go
And I don't know what I'm diving into
Just hanging by a moment here with you
There's nothing else to lose
There's nothing else to find
There's nothing in the world
That can change my mind
There is nothing else
There is nothing else
There is nothing else
Desperate for changing
Starving for truth
I'm closer to where I started
Chasing after you.... “
Spike saw her reaction to the song and grinned as he sang. He made sure that the whole time he sang, he never broke eye contact, and it seemed she was doing the same thing. The smile that graced her face let him know that she didn’t hate him. It didn’t mean that she wasn’t still a little bit hurt or that they didn’t have to talk about anything, but it did let him know she didn’t want to end it.
“I'm falling even more in love with you
Letting go of all I've held onto
I'm standing here until you make me move
I'm hanging by a moment here with you
I'm living for the only thing I know
I'm running and not quite sure where to go
And I don't know what I'm diving into
Just hanging by a moment here with you
Just hanging by a moment (here with you)
Hanging by a moment (here with you)
Hanging by a moment here with you…”
She knew that it was just a song that had probably been sung by a lot of people to a lot of different people, but to her, it seemed like Spike wrote the words just for her. But didn’t it always feel that way when you were in love? Letting her smile grow bigger, she already knew the answer to that question.
As the song ended, Spike hopped off the stage and headed over to her. Buffy also got up from her stool by the bar, meeting him halfway. She gave him a smile as he came at her with a boyish look on his face as he tilted his head to the side. “I really am sorry, Buffy. I didn’t want it to happen. Am I forgiven?” he asked softly.
Buffy stepped closer to him and wrapped her arms around him. “Yes. But we still need to talk about it…” She looked up at him with a smile. “And you can’t just sing an incredibly sweet song to me and be up on the stage all sexy-like to get me to forgive you,” she joked.
Spike laughed. “Yeah, I know. But there’s always the fact that I can write you a song and maybe even someday a poem,” he said with a grin.
Shaking her head, she stood on her tip-toes and kissed him. “I love you.”
“I love you, too, pet,” he said, leaning down and kissing her back, this time holding it longer. They were both too lost in each other and didn’t notice that a lot of other people had been watching. That was until they kissed and the crowd started applauding, cheering them on.
Buffy pulled away from the kiss, embarrassed, and buried her face in his chest. The small action caused him to laugh. “Come on, pet. Let’s go home.”
FINI
squawks
05/18/17 04:16 am
pj! I remember wishing one of your stories would be finished seriously about a decade ago. Amazing. I just tried an old password I used to use and amazingly got in too. Memories!
pj
03/20/17 01:20 am
10 yrs later, i finally rem my username and password. Pari, you rock. Hope you are well.
Rabbit_moon1
12/23/16 01:12 pm
I donate every month. Please donate to keep this site up!
AudryDaluz1
10/06/16 08:34 am
Great post.
Chrissel
08/31/16 03:45 pm
And anyone else who loves this site, it's worth mentioning there's a nifty little "Donate" option just below the shout box here! ;)
Chrissel
08/31/16 03:43 pm
Just wanted to take a moment to thank Pari and all the mods for maintaining such a great site!
05/18/17 04:16 am
pj! I remember wishing one of your stories would be finished seriously about a decade ago. Amazing. I just tried an old password I used to use and amazingly got in too. Memories!
pj
03/20/17 01:20 am
10 yrs later, i finally rem my username and password. Pari, you rock. Hope you are well.
Rabbit_moon1
12/23/16 01:12 pm
I donate every month. Please donate to keep this site up!
AudryDaluz1
10/06/16 08:34 am
Great post.
Chrissel
08/31/16 03:45 pm
And anyone else who loves this site, it's worth mentioning there's a nifty little "Donate" option just below the shout box here! ;)
Chrissel
08/31/16 03:43 pm
Just wanted to take a moment to thank Pari and all the mods for maintaining such a great site!