Prologue

Ashes slowly fell to the grass between his booted feet as the cigarette slowly burned down, and got closer to his fingertips. He briefly pondered why his pristine white hands weren’t stained yellow with nicotine after decades of smoking at least a pack a day. You’d think there would be at least some sort of affect; it was downright unnatural. Might as well blame it on his vampire constitution; the many benefits of being beautifully undead. The cigarette’s red hot line finally reached his fingers and burned painfully bright for one moment but he didn’t drop the cigarette or even move, but let the fire burn.

The miniscule feeling of pain felt better than the emptiness and sorrow that filled his heart. To turn around and face the dark charred remains of his crypt, a silent ruined reminder of all the failures of his life. Sometimes he wondered why he didn’t just give up and walk out into the fuckin sun and really let it burn. It wasn’t like anybody would actually miss him. Those wonderful kind-hearted Scoobies reminded him of that every bloody day. Buffy would rather be with the empty dream of what used to be with the cardboard soldier than deal with whatever they had brewing. Cold comfort no longer wanted or needed. He knew moping wasn’t helping the situation and he was headed dangerously into Angel territory but damn it all if he didn’t know what else to do.

He finally tossed the remainders of the cigarette on to the ground and got off the cold wet grass. He turned around and faced his dark very crispy fried crypt and sighed. The last thing he wanted to do was go inside and clean up, to start all over… again. Spike was having an extremely bad week. And he’s had some bad ones in his time, but this one was right up there, a close tie with that time Dru tied him up in magically reinforced chains and practiced directing sunlight using a mirror onto essential parts of his anatomy.

'Guess it’s the car for me tonight. Least my girl never betrays me.' he grumpily thought.

Spike turned his back on the crypt and started trekking through the silent cemetery. No body or thing was around to break his depressed mood, not even a young vampire to take his aggressions out on. The only thing breaking the monotonous silence was the howling wind tugging at his coattails and pushing him forward. Occasionally it made a noise that sounded like a forlorn wail, which tugged at the moody poet hidden inside his heart. As he trudged forward, the wailing sound grew in strength and urgency. It was probably nothing really; a cat that got himself stuck in the tree perhaps, but yet the sound called to him, tugging him forward at a faster clip. Investigating was better than doing the nothing he was currently doing. The sound brought him closer to the edge of the cemetery where his car was parked. Behind the DeSoto, another car had pulled up, with the driver-side door swinging wide open. The driver had fallen out of the open door, limbs awkwardly askew. He was feebly trying to get up while holding a bundle in his right arm. Pain was evident in every slow movement of his legs and arms. The man finally lifted himself up and propped against the bottom of the car, breath coming out in short painful gasps. The wind suddenly changed directions and carried the strong scent of sweet blood to his sensitive nose. The blood was an intoxicating calling card, if there were any other vampires about, they’d soon be swarming.

'Damn, this bugger must me more desperate for death than me. Not that I’m one to judge.

Even though Spike was still some distance away, when the man lifted his face, the dim moonlighted highlighted his features as if he were in the sun. “Wesley?” In a blink of an eye, Spike was at Wesley’s side kneeling down and visually assessing his wounds. He looked like death warmed over and he couldn’t believe that the ex-watcher made the whole trip from LA.

“Wesley, what the bloody hell are you doing here in Sunnydale? And frankly you look like shit.”

And, Spike wasn’t exaggerating. He couldn’t believe his friend was still alive. He had a large gash running from neck to collar bone. It didn’t look like it hit any major arteries but he had lost a lot of blood. There also seemed to be a stab wound in his stomach. Wesley’s skin had taken on a sickly grey color and was clammy to the touch. He needed to get help fast or he wouldn’t make it past another hour.

“Spike, thank heavens, I didn’t think I’d make it.” The words falling from Wesley’s lips where low and dry, like they were crawling out of his throat in a slow and painful process. His breathing was shallow and he took a long breath before continuing. “You have to keep him safe…safe from Angel. You’re the only one who I could think of to come to.” Apparently speaking drained the last vestiges of energy from him and he passed out cold. Spike could hear his heart beat still beating faintly in his chest so there was still hope, but he’d have to get him to hospital soon or he wouldn’t be walking the earth much longer.

The bundle in Wesley’s arms suddenly started to move, wiggling urgently. Then a small heartbreaking wail broke through, the wail he heard from across the cemetery. As Spike pealed the layers of the blanket away to reveal Wesley’s precious package he realized that this was no ordinary object or even an ordinary baby because that would be something. No this was Angel’s own son squirming impatiently.

“Bloody Hell!” was all Spike could say.

Chapter 1



Los Angeles - A Few Hours Earlier



Wesley rushed out of the apartment with Connor in one arm, his suitcase in his other. He couldn’t believe that he had to go as far as stealing Angel’s own baby away, but he just couldn’t take the chance. There were just too many variables including Angel’s own unstable soul. He just couldn’t live with himself if anything happened to little Connor no matter how much he valued Angel’s friendship. Wesley quickly threw his suitcase in the trunk and hurried over to the back door to put Connor inside. Suddenly he heard the sound of moaning and quickly turned to see a woman, arms wrapped around her middle, stumbling towards him through the park across the street. It was too dark to see who exactly it was so he drew this gun with his right hand.



“That’s close enough” Wesley warned.



The woman stumbled to her knees and looked up through the disarrayed curtain of dark hair, eyes shining with tears.



“Justine?”



"He's everything you said. It's true." She answered.



Wes slowly lowered his gun and stepped closer. "What happened?" He asked, worried as to why Holtz’s right-hand had come to him in such a state.



"Well… he didn't keep his word." She let out a pained laugh. Wes put the safety back on his gun and put it away. It looked as if the treacherous nature of Holtz had finally revealed itself to her. Justine looked like she was in extreme pain and she still clutched her stomach as she slowly rose to her feet.



"He took everybody and he went after the baby. And when I questioned him...”



As she got closer, Wes finally got to see the bruises that marked her face as well as her bloodied lip. He couldn’t help but react angrily. “Bastard! I'll kill him for this. You have to get out of here."



Seemingly exhausted, Justine fell against Wes.



"You have to get to hospital."



"No. I just need to do..."



Suddenly a voice yelled out from the shadows “Watch out!” just as Justine pulled out a knife. Wes reacted as quickly as he could but he did not have much maneuverability with Connor in his arm. He shoved Justine away but quick as a snake she had already struck with her knife. It ripped through his flesh downward from the top of the neck to his collarbone. Although weakened, it wasn’t enough to drop him. He grabbed the gun out of his pocket and clocked her hard across the face and she went down, hitting the pavement hard. Deciding not to check on Justine, just in case she was playing possum, he dashed into the car clutching a bawling Connor and sped off with squealing tires.



Wesley checked his wound as best as he could. He was still conscious so apparently she had missed any major arteries, but he needed to get help fast and Sunnydale was at least four hours away from LA even if he greatly exceeded the speed limit. He didn’t trust Buffy enough for help, he was positive she wouldn’t be able to resist contacting Angel. And Giles wouldn’t be able to resist telling Buffy so it was the same problem. But there was Spike, and strangely enough he’d come to believe in him and his unusual redemption story. He’d help, he knew it, he had to. Besides, he didn’t know where else to go.





**********************



Sunnydale - Now



Spike hated his life. When things get bad, always, but always remember, they can and will get worse. Case in point, he was now stuck in perpetual purgatory, otherwise know as the waiting room at Sunnydale General Hospital. He may act the big bad, but in reality he hated everything about hospitals: the smell, the taste of sick blood in the air, and definitely the bloody awful chairs. If Wesley survived he was going to kill him; kill him slowly so he could endure the same punishment he was relegated to. The least the wankers at the hospital could do was provide current mags instead of the random collection of medical periodicals and gossip fluff published before 1995. People were bloody well dying here and they couldn’t provide good entertainment? Humans had their priorities totally screwed. At least he had Connor to keep him company. He begrudgingly admitted that the sprog was a tad bit entertaining.



“Okay lil’ bit, what shall we read. Ooh lookie here, we have a fascinating article on the upcoming blockbuster Waterworld. Never understood the appeal of Costner. His accent in Robin Hood was a crime. Women were crazy about the sod though. You better thank the Powers that you have a pecker.”



Connor’s only reaction was to gurgle and stuff his foot in his mouth. Spike couldn’t help the smile that curled his lip. He was never one for ankle biters but Connor was downright charming. He had yet to cry and strangely enough he seemed to actually listen when he talked, which was a miracle in itself. And blast it all, he smelled good, and not even in an, ‘I want to eat you’ way.



Spike couldn’t help himself, all of a sudden he found himself giving Connor stomach raspberries. And then he had to do it again, and again. Damn it if Connor’s giggles weren’t infectious. Thankfully, nobody was around this time of night to witness his humiliation. Spike was mid a particularly good raspberry and giggle fest when a voice interrupted the pair.



“Hey Spike, sorry it took me so long, but I dropped by Freddie’s Demon Market Plus to pick up some good snackies and blood for you.”



And there stood Clem, the light shining off his wrinkled skin like a hideous angel from heaven.



“I’ve never been so happy to see your ugly mug. Hand over the goods.”



“Well, hello to you too Spike. I figured you’d want some snackies as well so I also have some Doritos, cheesy poofs, oreos, and the healthier option of wheat thins. “



“Ahh, the breakfast of champions! You’re a pal”. Spike then proceeded to dig into the generous amount of munchies and swig down the blood at an alarming fast rate. Clem patiently waited for Spike to turn his attention back to him and explain the late night trip to the hospital but Spike seemed to be too engrossed in filling his stomach to pay any more attention to little ol’ Clem.



“Ahem, Spike, are you going to actually tell me why you called me over in the middle of the night to the hospital no less. I was entertaining a lady friend of mine. You should see what she can do with her tentacles. Amazing stuff. You owe me big time. And is that a baby in your lap?”



“Oh yeah, that. Well, I was bored and hungry and who better than my good buddy Clem to provide entertainment and sustenance.”



“There is still the baby. Come on Spike, spill now, I mean it.” Clem gave him ‘the look’ and his look meant business. Maybe it was all the folds of his skin, or how his eyes turned a wee bit red, but never-the-less, he knew not to mess with Clem when he was on the receiving end.



“Ok mate, here’s how it goes. Wesley’s the one who’s been admitted, he’s a watcher or well he used to be, but once a watcher always a watcher I say, look at Giles. Well, Wesley calls me up one day out o’ the blue. How he got my number is beyond me, cause it’s unlisted. I blame Giles. A big problem Watchers have is that they read too much and Wesley is definitely guilty of that sin. He’d been reading prophecies and the like, and came across something peculiar about two vampires, the slayer, souls, yada yada. I wasn’t paying much attention to his ramblings, but apparently he called me up because of my tenuous relationship with the slayer. Apparently Giles has been giving him updates on me. So Wesley starts asking me a load of questions I don’t care to answer so clearly I hung up on him. But this bloke is bloody persistent and keeps calling back, eventually wears me down and we end up playing chess over the phone. I tell him that every time he takes a piece he’ll get an answer from me. Unfortunately I underestimated his skills and he’s a brilliant chess player and I spill more information than I ever wanted to. During these chess sessions, we got to conversing, he’s actually not half bad for a geek. I have a feeling he keeps his dark side hidden.”



“Spike, long story short.”



“Hold on, hold on, I was getting there. To continue, one day he calls me up and has fucking brilliant news. Angel had gone and had himself a little sprog by Darla which is little Connor here. Of course Wesley is beyond himself and starts reading even more dusty old books looking for any clue on what was going on. After that bit o’ news I didn’t hear a word from him. I was just starting to think he’d lost interest in little ol’ me when he shows up knocking at death’s door wanting me to keep Connor hidden from his da’, not that I blame him, Angel has always been a pompous ass. So I take the watcher to hospital, call you up and here we are now.”



“So are you like actually friends with a watcher?”



“Of course not! How could you even think that! I’m a vamp with standards.”



The look that Clem gave him just screamed ‘Yeah, right!’ and Spike couldn’t help but to respond.



“Okay, okay, maybe, but vague acquaintances at the most. Stop looking at me like that. Alright, we’re friendly, I enjoy our conversations over chess, but it’s not like I have many people to talk to besides you. I feel like a leper half the time. I’m man enough to admit that it gets a tad bit lonely at times. And it’s not like Angel provides Wesley with any sort of mental stimulation, he’s thick as a brick that one.



Clem stared at Spike in awe for several long moments and then sat down heavily next to him. “Spike, you have the strangest luck of any vampire I’ve ever met.”



“You’re telling me. Don’t breathe a word ‘bout this.” he answered while bouncing a squirming Connor on his knee.



“Like seriously, who am I going to tell?”



Connor chose at that moment to reach out and grab Clem’s generous ear and started giggling infectiously then continued to repeatedly tug and giggle like it was the best thing in the world. Of course Clem couldn’t helped to be charmed by his complete lack of fear.



“He’s kinda cute for a human baby, even with all that tight skin” Clem commented, amused by the baby and the situation in general.



“I’m growing rather attached to him.” Spike answered. And he was, even in these few short hours. Connor was making a feeling grow inside him that he thought died a long time ago with the loss of his mother, the tiny flame of genuine joy. He pulled Connor away from the temptation of Clem’s ears and lifted him above his face, wiggling him and bringing his little body down toward his up-turned face. Spike nipped at Connor’s little hands as they tried to reach for Spike’s laughing face making him giggle in return. He finally kissed his rosy cheeks and brought him back down to his lap. Angel always was a lucky bastard. Envy and resentment at his sire burned painfully bright in his chest for a moment. He brought his hand to the spot on his chest where his heart lay still beneath and rubbed the throb futilely.



“So what are you going to do? Vampires aren’t exactly qualified to be parents.” Clem asked.



“That, mate, I’m not to sure about yet. But I’m definitely going to need one more little favor. My crypt is a crispy mess and I can’t take lil’ bit there, it’s downright unsanitary. I need a new place to stay.”



“Spike, first of all, do you have any money to pay for an apartment and secondly are you absolutely sue you want to do this? I mean, this a baby Spike! A real, live, squirming, crying, pooping baby. Why not just give him over to Buffy? This should totally be her territory.”



“First of all, ‘course I have some dosh. I’m over 100 years old, I just prefer the simple life. Secondly, piss off. I can’t approach Buffy about this, so don’t ask again. She’d just go running straight back to Angel. Connor’s my responsibility now. I’ll tell the slayer when the time’s right.”



Spike’s steely blue gaze sent chills down Clem’s back. When Spike was determined, there was nothing to persuade him otherwise, and he’d do best to just back off and be supportive.



“Alright, alright, no need for the killer death glare.” Clem answered. I have this friend, goes by the name of Shorty. He has terrible taste in clothing, and smells a little funny but overall pretty cool. He owns a few businesses that caters to non-volatile demons such as myself including an apartment building. It’s pretty swanky, and Buffy has no idea it exists. He’s usually at his diner at this time of night so I’ll go ask him if there are any units open.”



Spike couldn’t help the look of relief that came over his face. He was used to looking after himself and Dru, but this was something entirely different. “Thank’s a lot, you’ve been a real pal. I have a couple of extra kittens I’ll send your way.”



“Throw in a box of chex mix and we’re even. That’s some good stuff. I owe you anyway for not tattling about the extra cards I hide in my skin folds.”



So, life had taken a turn for the decidedly strange side, but with pals like Clem, things were looking up.

Chapter 2

Los Angeles - A few hours ago

It was taking too long. Something went wrong; he could feel it. He trusted Justine to complete the task but he was starting to doubt his faith in her. He should have known better than to trust anybody, but himself. However, he didn’t have a choice in the matter. Suddenly headlights from a car appeared in the distance, as it approached the meeting spot, Holtz stepped out of the shadows. It stopped in front of him and he could see Justine peering at him from the driver’s side so he quickly stepped in.

“I take it that it didn’t go well.” Holtz’s voice was cold and unforgiving causing Justine to flinch.

“Somebody warned him, but I’m not sure who. I sliced him but he still got away with Connor. He clocked me with a gun… hard. By the time I came to, Welsey was long gone.” Justine rubbed her sore face, before she continued. “Damn, my face hurts, you owe me dental work.”

“I owe you nothing, you’re the one lost Connor and now we’re going to have to track him down. I’m not letting Connor get away, so let’s go.”

They had barely driven a few moments before a Humvee overtook their car, quickly cutting them off. As Justine swerved off the road to escape, more vehicles quickly approached and blocked them from going any further. Thinking quickly, Holtz grabbed a blanket and bag that he spotted in the back seat. Without Connor he had nothing to negotiate with, but they didn’t know that.

Holtz looked out the window to see Angel jump out of one of the SUVs then charge their car. Holtz quickly wrapped the blanket around the bag while Justine jumped out of the car in an attempt to stall Angel. However, she was no match for the raging vampire and was quickly thrown aside.

"Come any closer and I'll snap his neck!" Holtz yelled. That definitely got everyone’s attention, including Angel, who stopped dead in his tracks. Holtz looked around to see that he was surrounded by men in commando gear, each with a gun trained at him. Either Angel had more friends than he thought or more likely a very powerful enemy.

"Who are they?" Holtz asked

"They work for me." A beautiful and impeccably dressed woman approached him. She exuded power and confidence from every pore.

"Ah. The attorney." Holtz quickly realized.

"Yes.” Lilah answered “You are gonna give us the kid, Captain Holtz."

"Don't!" Angel exclaimed, the panic on his face evident. Holtz thought this was a very interesting development but also inconvenient.

"That's cute. You'd rather see the fanatic with the baby than us?” Lilah couldn’t help but be amused by Angel’s panic. It was all too easy sometimes. She turned to address the real problem, Holtz. “Those are automatic weapons pointed at you. They didn't have them in your time. They fire sixteen bullets per second."

"And if they were going to use them they would have already. They want the baby alive." Angel pointed out.

"Something we all have in common." Holtz clutched his pretend Connor tighter. As long as they believed he had the baby, he’d be fine, otherwise he knew he’d be dead in moments

Suddenly, the air shivered and as a demon in the vague shape of a man appeared before them. His face looked melted and a large scar crossed it from forehead to chin. The demon was another enemy of Angel, Sahjhan.

Sahjhan smirked and said "Not all of us.” He then turned toward Lilah, “You do not want the child alive. You want the child dead. That was our arrangement."

"Yeah. I'm a lawyer. Have you met me? We have a new arrangement. I'm keeping the baby."

"You can't do that!" Sahjhan angrily exclaimed.

Lilah addressed the armed men circled around the group. "Ignore the loud mouth with the bad skin. He's impotent in this dimension."

"We're leaving." Holtz announced. He needed to get out of there before the situation got any worse.

Lilah was having none of it and her patience was wearing thin. "No one's going anywhere."

One of the commandos stepped closer to Holtz, and Angel swiftly knocked him down, taking his weapon before turning it on Lilah.

"Don't shoot." Lilah told her commandos. The situation was quickly getting out of hand and somehow she needed to get control back or her bosses would definitely not be happy.

"Yeah. You really don't want to. Your bullets won't kill me. But mine will kill you and her first." Angel threatened the commandos.

"He'll be dead before I hit the ground." Holtz warned holding the makeshift baby closer to him.

"I know." Angel answered.

"So. I'm going to leave now, right? With me, he gets to live, anyone tries to take him, he dies."

After a long beat, Angel said, "Take him."

Sahjhan couldn’t help but interject at this point, "Woah! No! What is wrong with you people?"

Holtz then turned to Angel relishing the distress he could see plastered on his face. He lost his entire family because of Angel and now he would know the extreme pain Holtz felt every single day. "I will take good care of him, as though he were my own son. He'll never even know you existed. Don't come after me. Holtz paused. “You will though, won't you? Maybe I should just..."

"No. Please." Angel pleaded. "Take him."

Sahjhan, raised his hands, proclaiming, "Lekko najine forkahdio!"

Suddenly, a big explosion with bright sparks lit the night and a bright hole opened in the air, a portal to a world with a blood-red sky.

"What you are looking into is the Quortoth, the darkest of the dark worlds. So, I can widen the portal and you can all be swallowed up by a world you cannot begin to imagine or you can keep your word and kill that child.” Sahjhan said as he turned to Lilah, “Now!"

When no one moved, Sahjhan spread his arms into the air. "Don't say I didn't warn you." The open portal that tore the night sky proceeded to become a larger more threatening presence.

Lilah knew when to cut her losses "Kill it."

"No!" Angel desperately yelled.

As the commandos and Angel stood there with their weapons trained at each other, Holtz knew what he had to do to survive this. He swiftly pushed Justine away from him so he could head for the fiery portal. As soon as Angel saw Holtz’s intentions he dropped his gun and charged after him, fearful that Holtz would be so mad as to take his baby in to that demon world.

Justine screams of "Daniel! Daniel!" was distant in Angel’s ears.

Angel yelled "No! No!" as Holtz jumped into the open portal and disappeared from view. Angel attempted to jump after him, but was violently thrown back by a lighting bolt that originated from the center. The force was so powerful, Angel flew through the air at least 10 feet, then landed hard on the ground. He painfully rolled over to look back at the portal.

"Wow. I didn't count on that. Kinda takes care of my problem." Sahjhan chuckled. He then lifted his hands in the air again and said, "Forkahdio najine lekko."

The portal to Quortoth quickly shrunk to a pinpoint before it completely disappeared from sight as if it never existed.

Satisfied with the outcome Sahjhan looked down at Angel and said "All right then. Have a good summer." And with that he disappeared as quickly as he came.

Lilah looked down at the tortured vampire in disdain. "Hmph! Well, I'm looking at a mountain of paperwork."

One of Lilah’s armed men asked, "Should we do something about..."

Looking back at Angel, she answered, "Yes, we should. We should let him suffer."

In disbelief at all that happened, Angel rolled over onto all fours and looked around him in devastation. Unable to get up, overwhelmed by emotion he collapsed back down and stared at where the portal had been and mournfully uttered "Connor."


Sunnydale - Now

Life could be a funny thing. In the hundred plus years that Spike had been walking the earth, it never ceased to surprise, amaze, and entertain him. Just a few short hours ago, he sat sulking in front of his crispy crypt like a right tosser but the fates must have been in a pleasant mood because things had taken a 180-degree turn for him. There he sat in his car staring at his new home, an extremely posh apartment building. Did he mention the posh part? It was one of those industrial brick building that was built at the turn of the century turned into swanky modern lofts. The building was three stories high with large bay windows that went almost from floor to ceiling on each floor. The grounds were cultivated with trees lining the building, flower gardens, and even a sodding playground. That’s right, a playground! The pal that Clem was, he had really pulled through. But what the bloody hell had he gotten himself into? He missed his crypt, his dark dismal, safe, normal crypt where he could at least pretend he was still the big bad.

Spike slowly banged his head against the steering wheel of his beloved DeSoto hoping the dull ache it caused would wake him up from this bizarre dream. Dawn was approaching, but he was too knackered to leave the car, even if it was to settle in to his new flat. Connor cooed softly in his sleep in the seat next to Spike, causing him to turn toward the sound. Oh Angel was going to kill him right and proper when he found out. Oh, what the hell, life was short, might as well live the good life for a little bit. And maybe it was time he lived under the Slayer’s radar as well. If he kept his nose clean and stayed out of the scoobies way, he’d have a chance, a chance for something new. Who needed them anyway?

The only wee little problem was that of money. He didn’t quite lie to Clem, he did have enough to live on and pay rent for the next couple of months or so, but then he’d be plumb out, the well dry. Well, not quite dry, he was loaded, but Angel had done a runner with his inheritance and subsequent funds after he got his soul. All of his accounts were all wrapped up in some bank account run by Wolfram and Hart. Maybe he could have Clem’s pal Shorty help him out. shorty seemed to be connected in the demon business world.

His rambling thoughts were suddenly broken by a sharp knock on the window.

“Hello there! Welcome to Twin Palms!” Outside his driver side window was a five-foot Mynoth demon that looked suspiciously like an overgrown shi tzu waving at him enthusiastically. He was covered in a creamy white fur from head to foot and was dressed in an impeccable grey suit. Spike sighed heavily before he looked over to Connor. “Guess this is as good a time as any lil’ bit.” He grabbed the snoozing baby and swiftly got out of the car.

The shi tzu started gabbering immediately. “Mr. Pratt, what a pleasure to meet you sir! Your reputation precedes you. I’m Mr. Taylor.” He promptly grabbed Spike’s right hand and started shaking it vigorously. “When Shorty called me up, the Mrs and I were over the moon with excitement. To have a vampire such as yourself in such close consort with the slayer living in our community, it really is an honor. Your presence will be sure to give a respectable community such as ourselves a good name with Ms. Summers. You see the, Home Owners Association has been concerned she would mistake us for the common demon riff raff and burn us to the ground. Sure there was that one time the Magrong decided to try his hand at world domination but teenagers will have their rebellious times. Now that you’re here though, we can put those fears to rest. You will put in a good word for us with the slayer, right?”

“Umm, yeah, sure, whatever.” Spike nodded dumbly. This was too weird for him. He was used to bringing anarchy, not respectability.

“Oh, and what have we here?!” the shih tzu continued. This must be your little boy Clem talked about. I had no idea that vampires were able to have children. I’ve been told to keep your situation quiet, and you can trust me on that, I assure you. We’ve had 8 little ones ourselves. They’re all grown up and married and we miss their little barks.” Spike made no movement except to raise his left-eyebrow a little higher as the only sign of his slight amusement at this ridiculous creature. The shih tzu kept rambling on undeterred by Spike’s unresponsiveness.

“It’s always a pleasure to have a family man join our little community. By the smell of your boy, he’ll be a powerful one when he grows. Well, come on, come on, what are we doing standing here when the sun will light the sky soon. Let’s get you all settled. If you give me your keys, I’ll park your vehicle in the underground garage. I’ve put you in one of the nicest units. And you’ll be happy to know that all our windows are tempered with UV proof glass which means no poofing into dust, isn’t that great?”

As the mynoth demon looked at Spike with excited expectation, all he could answer was “Yeah, sure, great.” Never in his life had words failed Spike so completely.

They went through the front double glass doors and entered the lobby area. The lighting was low but the room felt warm and comfortable. On the right side of the room was a large lit fireplace with shelves filled with books on either side of it. The fixtures appeared to be from the art deco period and added to the classic upscale feel. Scattered around the room were large plush chairs for lounging and on top of that, at the back wall were French glass doors that opened to a lush terraced patio. A few residents were sitting around the fire chatting but they didn’t take any notice of their group as they walked through the lobby and continued up the stairs.

Everything was moving so fast, Spike barely had time to take it all in. By the time he got to his new flat he was too knackered to pay attention to his new landlord.

“….and you have Mrs. Felding down the hall. Very nice lady but kind of strange; she actually has three cats that she doesn’t want to eat, can you imagine? To each their own, I always say. Well, here it is.” Mr. Taylor motioned to the door they had stopped in front of.” I’ll let you get settled and will give you a tour of the grounds tomorrow. I put one of the old cribs in the master bedroom. If you have any questions, I’m in apartment 1. Ta ta!” And with that the fluffy guy was gone as quickly as he came.

Barely taking in his surroundings, Spike wandered around the rooms until he found the master bedroom. In all the commotion, somehow Connor had still stayed asleep on his shoulder. He gently laid him down in the old-fashioned wooden crib then planted a soft kiss on his forehead before he quickly stood and scrubbed his hand across his face in a futile attempt to get rid of the squishy feelings a vampire had no right to feel. ‘Need a bed now. The best thing to do is just to sleep on it’ thought Spike. He proceeded to strip everything off, crawl under the covers, and fall into a dreamless sleep.

_________________________

“What? Huh?” Spike snorted. He rolled over on to his back, and stared at the blank ceiling, trying to blink the sleep out of his eyes. Something had woken him up just as he was starting to get a good sleep on, something loud, very loud. He rubbed the grime out of his eyes and blurrily looked towards the source, which turned out to be the baby cot. Well, not the cot itself, but whatever was in it. Then the events suddenly all came back to him in a flash. He slowly got up detangled himself from his sheets and peered into the cot to see a squalling Connor who looked non too happy.

“What’s all this ruckus about? Feels like I just laid you down.” Apparently babies had different hours than vamps. Then the unmistakable smell hit him. Oh, the smell.

“Oye! That is an awful stink you’ve created. Blimey! What am I going to do with you?”

He located the bag full of baby junk Wesley had brought with him and searched through it but didn’t know where in the hell to start. There was nappies, wipes, powders, cloths, and loads more that he had no idea what their use was for.

“Okay, I can do this, I’m a man of many abilities.” Apparently not every ability, because got as far as tossing out the foul nappy and putting Connor’s bum under the bathroom faucet to wash off the rest of the stink when he came stumped. He needed some advice from a female, and unfortunately he was on short supply. But there was one bird he did trust even if she was a do-gooder and luckily he nicked her phone number.

“Tara, luv, I need your help, and you can’t tell the Scoobies.” He paused, as he listened to her reply. “No! This is not illegal, I swear.”

Chapter 3

“Dear Goddess, please help me get through this.” Tara could only plead to a higher power for help as she stood immobilized in fear, just staring at her big green enemy, her bridesmaid gown. Why did she say yes? She wasn’t even that close to Anya. But Anya begged, and gave her the big round sad doe eyes. She couldn’t say no to a person in need. She wished she had the ability to say no, but every time she tried, yes came out of her mouth and it lead to situations like this where she had to put on that monstrosity of a bridesmaid gown. And she somehow she ended up with the ugliest version as well. Buffy somehow convinced Anya to take off the fluttery long sleeves, so she came out looking at least a little delicate beneath the neon, but no, she wasn’t so lucky. She looked like she got attacked by a cloth monster.

“Ugh!” With a big sigh she let herself fall flat on her stomach on to the bed besides her dress and moaned.

“Could you like try and be a little more quiet, some people need their beauty rest,” mumbled Lana from the twin bed across the small dorm room before turning over and putting the blankets further over her head.

“Sorry” Tara meekly whispered. That was a whole other thing; she hated being back in the dorms. They were able to fit her in last minute because another girl had “mysteriously” disappeared but her new roommate Lana was just resentful of her appearance and the loss of a double single room to herself. This situation didn’t make missing Willow any easier. Her heart throbbed every time she thought of her beautiful redheaded pixie.

Suddenly her cell phone started to ring on the bed stand besides her. She quickly grabbed it and shot out into the hallway so she wouldn’t disturb her roommate further.

“This is Tara.”

“Tara, luv, I need your help, and you can’t tell the Scoobies.”

“Sp..Spike? How did you get my number? Why are you ca..ca..calling me?” She stuttered out a little bit. She hated that she constantly fumbled her words. Sounding like Porky Pig didn’t exude confidence to people. She took a calming deep breath and continued more quickly. “This better not involve any criminal activities.”

“No! This is not illegal, I swear.”

“Well, why don’t you tell me why you called, and I’ll decide that. And, you didn’t answer my first question.” Tara slid down the wall to sit on the floor in the hallway and pulled her knees to her chest, might as well get as comfortable for her bizarro world conversation with Spike. Talking on the phone with Spike was definitely something far from the norm and something she really never had expected to happen, like at all.

“Well, I kinda nicked your phone number from Willow’s phone when I was at Buffy’s house awhile. It never hurts to be prepared, I say. And this is totally on the up and up, but it’s a bit awkward to explain on the phone. Maybe you can come over to my flat, and I’ll show you. I’ll make it up to you in some way, I promise. It’s just…well…you were the only person I could think to ask. Me and Buffy aren’t quite on speaking terms at the moment.”

There was just something about Spike that always made her want to help him. She had a hard time saying no to people normally, but it was even worse with him. Besides, it’s not like he really asked for something from her in their entire existence knowing each other. And Spike was unlike any other person she came across. If she would describe him in one word based on his aura alone, it would be passionate. It came out of every pore. So as she sat there biting her lip, the sensible part of her brain was saying “No” and she really was going to say no this time, but the words coming out of her mouth were actually “Okay, I’ll come over.”

So there she was, thirty minutes later standing in front of his door, a door that didn’t belong to a crypt. She was nervously twirling the silver commitment ring Willow had given her trying to work up the nerve to just knock. Finally she moved her right hand up into knocking position and the door swung open and there stood Spike staring at her fist in his face.

“Glinda, be a luv and put your hand down and don’t hit me in the face. Come on in, I need your womanly advice.” With that he grabbed her hand and swiftly dragged her inside his apartment. Now, she can admit, that although she preferred the curves of a female, she could admire the cut of a beautiful man, and oh was Spike beautiful. Most of his manly lines, cuts, and curves were on full display since all he wore were some low slung black jeans. She was flustered at the best of times and now she felt like she would never be able to untie her tongue. From the heat warming her face, she also knew that she was probably as red as a tomato as well. And the cocky bastard knew it too.

“Just, put your bag down on the couch, we need to go upstairs” Spike told Tara yanking her quickly after him. He took her upstairs to the loft space and headed for the bedroom door to the right. She couldn’t help but notice how large and beautiful his new place was. She was starting to doubt his assertion that he hadn’t done anything illegal. Spike stopped suddenly before the door and blocked her view.

“Ok, so things are going to look right fishy, but I can explain everything.” Spike moved out of her way and as she stepped into the room, what she saw floored her. There on the bed was a chubby squiggly baby. Needless to say, that was the last thing she ever expected.

“What? Huh? I mean, what?” That’s all she could get out of her mouth. She looked dumbly from the baby up to Spike’s sheepish face. He brought his left hand up and rubbed the back of his head in an unconscious show of embarrassment.

“It’s a bloody long story luv.” He answered sheepishly.

“Well, you better start telling it now”. Said Tara, poking Spike in the chest. The look on her face didn’t allow for any arguments and Spike swallowed hard. He knew that if he didn’t give her a good answer now, he’d be in a world of trouble. Never ever get on the bad side of a witch.

“To sum up, this here is Conner. He’s Angel’s baby and I’m protecting him from his da’.”

Tara sat down heavily on the bed in total shock. Sunnydale never failed to offer her surprises. After a lengthy pregnant pause she answered, “Angel can have children? He’s still a vampire right? Okay, you’ve bought yourself some time, but start explaining and quickly.”

Spike didn’t waste any time. He went into the whole sordid story. Some parts a little too sordid for her taste, but he was nothing if not thorough. And in the end, she believed him. I mean, how could she not believe him, it was Spike. Spike was many things, but a liar was not one of them. It was a blessing and a curse that she could read people so well, and right now she could not only just see Spike’s desperation, she could feel it flowing off of him like a surging tide. She looked down at naked Connor squirming between them and tickled his soft tummy.

“Oh dear” was all she could answer at first. He looked at her expectantly, trying to suppress any hope and she folded.

“Ok, I’ll help. Let me guess. You first want me to help you with Connor’s diaper.”

“The thought had crossed my mind.” Spike tried to do his best to look humble and meek, which looked pretty silly on him.

Tara sighed, what had she gotten herself into? Somehow Spike seemed to read her mind and said, “Don’t worry luv, let’s think of this as an adventure, with a baby, like that movie with that Elizabeth Shue bird.”

“I hate to tell you this Spike, but diapers are not a fun adventure. Come on, let’s come up with a plan while I help you deal with poop.” Spike was in deep shit when this was all over.