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A/N: The text is bold is a dream, also, my chapters are too long, so I'll cut them in half. They'll probably all have part 1 and 2
CHAPTER 1: Sweet Dreams, part 1
"Hey B, how's it going?"
Buffy turned around and instinctively dropped into a fighting stance.
"Faith... " The dark hair girl stood nonchalantly in front of her, the patented irritating Faith smirk on her face. She was repeatedly slamming her fist in her palm, tensed and ready to fight.
"Geez I love that feeling..." The brunette said, her dark eyes locked with Buffy’s hazel ones.
"What feeling?" Buffy asked, knowing the answer she would get.
"The happy feeling I get every time I'm about to kick your skinny ass."
The brunette slayer pulled out a knife that Buffy recognized instantly.
"And I do believe, if we want to be fair B, that it's my turn to stick this beauty in your guts. Isn’t it the way it goes?… Your turn my turn, right? And I assure you I'll have a gay ol time doing it."
To make sure Buffy got her point; she kicked her across the face.
"And then..."
Other kick in the stomach.
"I'll celebrate with your vamptoy. You know I always have a soft spot for your boyfriends..."
All of a sudden, the street started moving and cracking underneath their feet. The buildings around them were in flames and the sky turned blood red.
Buffy started fighting for her life against her sister slayer, giving blow for blow, kick for kick. Faith laughed.
"I'll bring that town down... and why stop there? I'll bring the world down with it."
"And then what? You'll be Queen of Hell? How fitting!" Buffy snickered
Another burst of annoying laughter from the rogue slayer.
"Sounds good to me. And I think I'll make a hell of a Queen. You could be my slave. I'll throw a party, and you can entertain my guests. How ‘bout that girlfriend? Sounds like a freakin’ good idea to me.”
"Yeah, you can keep dr..."
As she started speaking, Faith took the opportunity to throw Buffy on the ground, immobilizing her, the knife on her throat.
"Sorry, you were saying B?” She lowered her head so her lips were almost touching Buffy’s ear “Take one last look at this world, cause it's time for you to go princess.” She pronounced every word carefully, the way she would if explaining something complicated to a child.
Buffy looked up, and saw Spike sitting on the sidewalk looking at them. "Spike! Help me... You have to stop her."
At first, she thought he didn't hear her because he didn’t move. Then, he crushed his cigarette, and looked away. "Sorry luv. No can do.”
“Wh.. What?… Spike?”
“I didn't think that would happen, but it did. I’ve had enough. You’ve hurt me too much Summers." Buildings were now falling down everywhere. Screaming could be heard but the streets were empty. Buffy could feel the heat of the blazing fires.
"And that's what you are Buffy: hurt. Everything about you hurts. Loving you is a painful thing. You told me once that I’m in love with pain. You were wrong. I was in love with you. But you pushed me to my limit. Now I won't help you because I can’t be near you. I need to get away from you. Take care of the psycho bird yourself luv. You don’t need me. You made it quite clear.”
He got up and started walking away.
"Spike!! Please, no..."
"Someone just got dumped." Faith said in Buffy's ear with a sing song voice. "I think he's on my side now B. Too bad, he was trying so hard at being good.... But little Miss Muffet has been a naughty girl, and now he's not coming back. Too bad for you, he was kinda cute."
"Spike... come back" Buffy said one last time before feeling the blade cutting into her skin.
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Buffy bolted upright in her bed, sweating, her hands going instinctively around her throat. A dream. Just a dream. She let herself back down on the bed with a “humph” and took a few deep breaths to try calming down and will her body to stop shaking.
Fear was now gripping her throat while she was replaying the dream in her head, trying to figure out what it meant. I had been a Slayer’s dream; there were no doubts. Easy enough to figure out: cryptic messages, apocalyptic setting…
“Fuck!” Buffy mumbled to herself before furiously pushing her thick duvet away and jumping out of bed. “Just what I needed.”
She got dressed in a record time and ran down the stairs. Walking past Dawn, she didn’t even glance in her direction.
"Good morning to you too Buffy." Her little sister said sarcastically. "Where are you going like that?"
"I'll be back." And she walked out the door without any more explanations.
The girl didn’t pay much attention to Buffy’s weird attitude. One of the perks of having The Slayer as your only family, you get used to the weirdness after a while.
Like every morning, Buffy took a second to look at the mail. Hoping. A letter, maybe. Just a note. Something to let her know he didn't stake himself, or stop loving her. No. Even if he hated her, just a few words so she would know he was still undead somewhere in this world, would be enough. But like every morning, there was nothing in the mailbox.
It had taken her a long time to get to the point where she was in her heart. A lot of struggles and long sleepless nights, torn between love and hate, forgiveness and accusations, missing him and… hating herself for missing him. A lot of things had been broken, a lot of tears had been shed, but she managed to work things out in her head and in her heart in the end. She accepted things that happened between her and Spike, good and bad, and put them where they belonged: in the past. She accepted her feelings for the vampire and was willing to finally face them. Only one problem though… he wasn’t there. Had been missing since that God awful night a few months ago, and was a no show ever since. No one had heard of him. He just disappeared without a trace. And what worried Buffy the most was that Spike was stubborn enough that if he ever decided never to come back… he could possibly do it.
*Nononono. Don’t think about that you idiot! Dream now, bad Spike thoughts later.*
She took off running to get to the Magic Box as soon as possible.
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Buffy burst into the newly renovated magic shop out of breath. And for The Slayer to be out of breath, it takes quite a lot of running... She had run from all the way across town without stopping, at full Slayer speed, eager to find out about the dream and discuss it with Giles.
"Buffy?.. Apocalypse again? I knew it. I had that feeling this morning when I woke up...." Anya started without looking up from the cash register.
"Where is Giles?" Buffy asked right away, not in the mood for being patient with the vengeance demon.
"I'm here" Giles said, coming out of the basement, a box in his hands. "What's going on?"
"End of the world." Anya said casually, still looking at the money, placing each bill carefully in its own little compartment.
Giles almost tripped over the carpet, but caught himself just in time.
"I never said that Anya" Buffy said rolling her eyes.
"Ok, so it's not the Apocalypse then. My bad."
"I didn't say that either..."
"So it is the..."
"Argh!!! Giles! Training room. Now!"
Frustrated, Buffy stomped her way to the new training room, Giles following in her tracks. The watcher was already taking his glasses off in expectation of what was to come.
"Is everything alright Buffy?" He asked his slayer with concern.
"Yes... No.. Well, I'm not exactly sure. I had a dream."
"Slayer dream?"
"Yes, and in more than one way."
Giles stopped cleaning his glasses and looked up at her curiously. "What do you mean exactly by that?"
"For one thing, it felt like a slayer dream, AND Faith was in it."
"Faith?"
Buffy told Giles about her dream. She was a little reluctant to tell him about Spike, but she did anyway, feeling it could be important.
"Buffy, this is none of my business and you know that I would never be prying into your private life if I didn’t have to, but I'm a little concerned. Didn't you tell me that what happened between you and Spike was purely..."
"Sexual? Yeah, I might have said that." Buffy answered, blushing at how blunt she had been.
"And it isn't true?"
"No. I mean, yes!.." she sighed "It's more complicated then that Giles."
“All right. Why don’t you try explaining it to me then?”
Buffy looked nervously down at her fingers, uncomfortable under her watcher's scrutiny.
"Ok. I, I might have feelings for him. And that includes incredible guilt for how bad I've messed up with his head and his feelings last year. “
"Buffy. You don't have to feel guilty about..."
"Giles! Please, let me finish. You're wrong. I’ve had a lot of time to think about this, about everything. And I think I’ve figured a few things out. About life, love, my job as the Slayer… the world in general. I had a way of seeing things before, and Spike helped me realize that I was wrong. Everything is not always black and white. I see it now. I use to think there is the soulful, and the soulless. The people, and the monsters. But soulful people can be monsters. And a soulless demon can want to change and do something good. And if a monster tries hard at going against his true nature, and instead of helping him , encouraging him, you deny his every effort and push him in the wrong direction... I think that makes you the monster. I hurt Spike, lying to him about my feelings, making him believe I was only using him when in fact, I was only ashamed of loving him. And I shouldn’t have been. I should have been proud. But most of all, I never acknowledged the fact that he was trying hard. Never gave him a word of encouragement. I'm sorry Giles, but I think I'm right to feel bad about myself."
Giles looked stunned. He was silent for a minute, trying to take everything in. Buffy got worried, but he smiled at her and in a very none British manner, he reached out and stroke her cheek affectionately.
"I am so proud of you Buffy. You've grown to be quite an amazing person."
"So you don't think I'm crazy?"
"Not at all. I’m mostly impressed with you actually. The way you understand the world around you, your instincts, your sense of moral and logic, go way beyond those of The Slayers that preceded you in history. The more you grow up, the more it is obvious to me that you are still here for a reason: because you can. So don’t ever beat yourself up over uncertainties. When you feel unsure, chances are you’re probably on the right track."
He stood up to leave the training room.
"Giles?.. About Faith?"
"Uh, right. Faith. I'll call the prison to make sure she's still there. I will let you know what I find out tonight, and we will work from there." He reached for the doorknob, but paused for a moment. “Buffy, I doubt Faith is on the run or the council would have contacted us. But there is still a chance of that happening. She’s proved to be quite resourceful in the past when it comes to making your life miserable. Just… be prepared for the worst.”
“I will Giles. I will.”
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A/N: So?.. How was it? Let me know!
squawks
05/18/17 04:16 am
pj! I remember wishing one of your stories would be finished seriously about a decade ago. Amazing. I just tried an old password I used to use and amazingly got in too. Memories!
pj
03/20/17 01:20 am
10 yrs later, i finally rem my username and password. Pari, you rock. Hope you are well.
Rabbit_moon1
12/23/16 01:12 pm
I donate every month. Please donate to keep this site up!
AudryDaluz1
10/06/16 08:34 am
Great post.
Chrissel
08/31/16 03:45 pm
And anyone else who loves this site, it's worth mentioning there's a nifty little "Donate" option just below the shout box here! ;)
Chrissel
08/31/16 03:43 pm
Just wanted to take a moment to thank Pari and all the mods for maintaining such a great site!
05/18/17 04:16 am
pj! I remember wishing one of your stories would be finished seriously about a decade ago. Amazing. I just tried an old password I used to use and amazingly got in too. Memories!
pj
03/20/17 01:20 am
10 yrs later, i finally rem my username and password. Pari, you rock. Hope you are well.
Rabbit_moon1
12/23/16 01:12 pm
I donate every month. Please donate to keep this site up!
AudryDaluz1
10/06/16 08:34 am
Great post.
Chrissel
08/31/16 03:45 pm
And anyone else who loves this site, it's worth mentioning there's a nifty little "Donate" option just below the shout box here! ;)
Chrissel
08/31/16 03:43 pm
Just wanted to take a moment to thank Pari and all the mods for maintaining such a great site!