Heartbeats
Spike felt the pain as he slowly came back to consciousness. His entire body was hurting, and he felt the taste of his own blood. He opened one eye, then the other. He was in the alley behind the Hyperion and the sun was shining down on him.
“Bloody hell!” He jumped into a shady part of the alley before realizing that he must have been in the sun for quite some time. He looked himself over. No visual burns, only cuts and other injuries from the battle.
“What the...” That was when he noticed the thumping. It was inside him and surrounding him at the same time. It took a while before he realized what it was. He hadn’t herd the sound in over a century. His own heart.
Spike slumped down against the wall of the Hyperion and looked around him, trying to figure out what was happening. The battle started to come back to him, and he winced at the memories. Gunn had only lasted about ten minutes, just like Illyria had said. But he had taken a lot of the enemies with him. Illyria had followed him a while later, he wasn’t sure how long. He remembered her body had turned back to Fred after she died. The last thing he remembered was Angel turning to dust as the fire of the already-dead dragon hit him. After that, it went black.
Spike got up and started wading through the demon bodies that were filling the alley. He found Illyria first, and carried her body into the lobby of the hotel before going back out. After another ten minutes or so, he put Gunn down next to Illyria. He knew that the only thing left of Angel would be dust, and decided it was time to leave this place that reeked of death and decay.
*****
As the sun set, Spike was standing outside Lorne’s apartment, knocking on the door. He had walked around LA the whole day, trying to figure out what had happened and, more importantly, what he was going to do. He remembered the Shanshu, that was supposed to restore humanity to a vampire with a soul. It had meant him after all, and not Angel, like everyone had thought. He was starting to get used to the sound of his own heartbeat, and had managed to get a glimpse of himself in a mirror. After that, he had gone to the Hyperion where he had gotten himself cleaned up. He had called the police and told them where they could find the bodies of his two friends before he left the hotel again to enjoy the feeling of sunlight on his skin.
Spike pushed the thoughts of the dead aside as the door in front of him opened to reveal Lorne. A look of surprise and relief was on the green demon’s face.
“Spike, oh my God, what happened? Where’s Angel, and the others?”
Spike pulled out of the tight embrace and Lorne stepped aside to let him in.
“Oh, sorry, I invite you in.” Lorne made a gesture to let him pass.
“So?” Lorne walked ahead of Spike into the living room and sat down on the couch. Spike followed his example.
“They didn’t make it.” He could see the impact his statement had on Lorne.
“They... but... you’re the only one left?” Spike nodded.
“There were thousands, maybe ten thousands of them. And I’m not talking tiny demons, I’m talking twenty foot dragons and the like. Don’t even know how I survived. One moment, I’m watching Angel catching fire from the dragon and get dusted, the next I’m lying in the alley, and I’ve got this heartbeat thing going.”
“You have a heartbeat? You mean... you’re alive, as in human?” Lorne looked shocked.
“Seems like. Haven’t had a chance to look into it, but got the heartbeat, the not-burning-up-in-sunlight, the reflection, oxygen being an issue...”
“So... what are you going to do now?” Lorne asked.
“I was hoping you could help me.” Spike gave his green friend a smile. “Need to see a certain girl.”
Reunion
Buffy woke from her own scream. She had been having one of her re-occurring nightmares. They had started to come more often again, almost as often as in the beginning. Right after the battle... She assumed it was because it would be a year ago next week that they fought for Sunnydale and the world. That she lost him...
Buffy sighed and got out of bed, knowing she wouldn’t be able to sleep anytime soon. She pulled her robe around herself and went out onto the balcony. The night was warm, and she sat down looking at the lights of Rome, letting her thoughts wander. She had the apartment to herself for another couple of days. Dawn was in the States with Giles, looking into different college options and Andrew was on a mission in England for the Council. Willow had sent her an e-mail a couple of days earlier, saying she would be in Italy till the next Monday, and Xander’s plane was arriving on Friday. They had decided to meet up for the ‘anniversary’ of Sunnydale to remember and try to heal each other.
Buffy knew that she was the main reason. Unlike the rest of the Scoobies, she hadn’t moved on and they knew it. She knew it, and she didn’t care. She was in a place where it felt like she would never be able to put the past behind her. She knew, deep down, that someday she would, but now was not that time. The others just needed to accept that. She was glad that she wasn’t going to be alone on the day in question, but she hoped they wouldn’t try to push her.
A person walking up the street caught her eyes. Bleached, blonde hair and black clothes. Her breath caught in her throat as he looked up at her and she realized that it wasn’t just somebody that looked like him. It was really him. He kept her eyes locked in his until he entered the front door of the building. The moment he disappeared from view, her body started functioning again and she ran inside to meet him.
*****
Spike walked up the street, her street. He had arrived in Rome only a couple of hours ago. Lorne had lent him money for the ticket, and enough to get back home. Not that he was planning to... He looked at the number on the house on his left. He was close now. He looked up, and he froze as his eyes found her on a balcony a couple of stories up in one of the buildings. He saw that it took her a moment to realize it was him, and why wouldn’t it? She thought he was dead, that he had given his life, or unlife, to save her and the world in that cave in Sunnydale. And he had. Just hadn’t planned on coming back. His legs started working again, and he kept eye contact with her until he opened the door to her building.
He took the steps two at a time, and soon he was standing outside her door. He stayed there a moment, preparing for the inevitable yelling and questions. Before he could bring up the courage to knock, she had flung the door open and thrown herself into his arms. He held her close, reveling in the feel of her, the smell, the warmth. After a couple of minutes, he noticed she was crying, so he pulled back a little to dry her tears. Their eyes met and before any of the knew what had happened, they were kissing passionately and tugging at eachother’s clothes. Without a word, Spike picked her up and carried her to the room he knew to be her bedroom. For the first time in almost a year, they both felt like they had come home.
*****
Spike laid in the bed, head held up by one elbow, and watched her sleep. She seemed so peaceful, so innocent. He placed a kiss on her forehead and she snuggled a little closer. Spike smiled at himself. How could he have waited this long to come to her? As he leaned in to give her another kiss, the phone rang in the living room. Not wanting Buffy to wake up, he rushed out to answer, but was beaten to it by the answering machine.
“Ciao, bella. Just called to say I’m back from Paris. Was wondering if I could steel you away for dinner tomorrow? Let me know.” Spike stood immobile as the message sounded through the apartment. The Immortal. How could he have forgotten? Of course she was still with him, why wouldn’t she be? Angry at himself, Spike went back to the bedroom where Buffy was still asleep. He pulled his jeans back on and looked around for the shirt before remembering it was out in the hallway. With one last look at Buffy’s sleeping form, he left the room, found his shirt and left her apartment, and her life.
*****
Buffy stirred in the bed, slowly going from sleep to awareness. She reached out for Spike beside her, like she always did. And, as always, she was shocked to find he was not there. But only for a moment. Because at the next moment, reality came back to her. He wasn’t there. He was dead. Gone. It had just been a dream. ‘But it was so real’ the little voice inside her whined. ‘So?’ the other voice, reason, contered, ‘Aren’t they always?’. Buffy sighed and pulled the covers tighter around her. She even thought she could smell him, that special smell that was only him. She pushed the tought aside and got out of bed. Of course it wasn’t there. He hadn’t been there. He would never be there.
squawks
05/18/17 04:16 am
pj! I remember wishing one of your stories would be finished seriously about a decade ago. Amazing. I just tried an old password I used to use and amazingly got in too. Memories!
pj
03/20/17 01:20 am
10 yrs later, i finally rem my username and password. Pari, you rock. Hope you are well.
Rabbit_moon1
12/23/16 01:12 pm
I donate every month. Please donate to keep this site up!
AudryDaluz1
10/06/16 08:34 am
Great post.
Chrissel
08/31/16 03:45 pm
And anyone else who loves this site, it's worth mentioning there's a nifty little "Donate" option just below the shout box here! ;)
Chrissel
08/31/16 03:43 pm
Just wanted to take a moment to thank Pari and all the mods for maintaining such a great site!
05/18/17 04:16 am
pj! I remember wishing one of your stories would be finished seriously about a decade ago. Amazing. I just tried an old password I used to use and amazingly got in too. Memories!
pj
03/20/17 01:20 am
10 yrs later, i finally rem my username and password. Pari, you rock. Hope you are well.
Rabbit_moon1
12/23/16 01:12 pm
I donate every month. Please donate to keep this site up!
AudryDaluz1
10/06/16 08:34 am
Great post.
Chrissel
08/31/16 03:45 pm
And anyone else who loves this site, it's worth mentioning there's a nifty little "Donate" option just below the shout box here! ;)
Chrissel
08/31/16 03:43 pm
Just wanted to take a moment to thank Pari and all the mods for maintaining such a great site!