Chapter 1

It was awkward for both of them, yet neither wanted to leave.

Spike didn’t quite know what he should do. Seconds ago he’d come here determined to kill her, regardless of the blinding headache it would cause. Shotgun in hand he found her sitting on the back steps, unarmed and unprepared. All he needed to do was aim and fire and the bitch would be gone, unable to torment him any longer.

That was before she looked up at him with tears in her eyes. She had to have noticed the shotgun but all she had done was asked him ‘What do you want now?’

At first he tried to ignore it, carry out what he came here to do, but the sight of the Slayer in tears threw him. Her voice, too, was off. Although she had spoken harshly in that ‘I don’t have time for this Spike’ tone she was so fond of, it hadn’t been her determined Slayer voice he’d heard, it was Buffy’s. A broken Buffy, tired and upset, a woman hanging on by a thread that was just about to break. All his anger and bitterness faded at the sight of the woman he knew he loved and could never have really harmed sitting in front of him.

“What’s wrong?” he heard himself say.

Buffy seemed surprised by his question before looking away.

“I don’t want to talk about it.”

She tried to hide her face from him but the tears were still there. Unsure of what he should do, but knowing he couldn’t walk away from her like this Spike sat down next to her, placing his shotgun beside him, leaving just enough space between them that she didn’t feel crowded.

Buffy didn’t seem to know what to do in this situation herself. He wasn’t going to leave now she knew, but she couldn’t go back in the house again. Not yet. She chose to just ignore him. It was nice to not be alone even though it was Spike. She didn’t want to be seen crying but he had snuck up on her and there was no hiding it from him now. Why bother telling him to leave? It never seemed to work anyway.

Spike studied her. He knew he was the last person she wanted around but she hadn’t told him to go away and despite what she felt about him, he loved her and she was upset. He couldn’t stop himself from trying to comfort her. Tentatively, he reached out a hand and patted her gently on the shoulder.

His touch shocked her and she raised her head up, refusing to look at him but stunned by his nervous attempt to comfort her. Her lip trembled and tears threatened to pour from her again at his closeness. She fought a strong urge to throw herself into his arms and burst into tears. She needed someone to tell her it would be okay. To hold her as she sobbed her heart out and keep her grounded as she fell apart at the news that her mother was sick and might actually be dying. But she was the Slayer, she needed to be strong and focus, nothing could break her down, she couldn’t afford to lose it now. And neither could Buffy. She had to hold it together for her Mom and for Dawn. They were relying on her and she wasn’t going to let them down.

Besides this was Spike. Once her mortal enemy and now a neutered vampire whose purpose lately had been to be an enormous pain in her ass, only helping out when paid to or beaten up badly enough. He was only helping her because he could hurt demons and since he couldn’t feed off of humans any more he had to take his love of violence out on something. That and he knew she might stake him if he didn’t give her reason not to. Even tonight, she had paid him for information about the slayers he’d killed. If that wasn’t a reminder that he was a brutal murderer whose only purpose in coming back to Sunnydale was to bag his third slayer she didn’t know what was. But now he was sitting beside her and offering his support, as if they were close friends. It confused her but she was too worried about her mother’s illness to care right now, so she let him comfort her.

It only lasted a few seconds before he took his hand away. He knew he’d been overstepping his boundaries and he didn’t want to push it but she had accepted what he’d offered and if he was honest with himself that scared him. The Slayer he knew wouldn’t have let him near her, harmless or not. She especially wouldn’t have wanted him to see her crying or let him touch her. The fact that she had had clued him in that something was seriously wrong in her life.

He knew she’d been worried about that vampire staking her. It was a close call and what he’d said tonight about death being her art and that she wished for it had thrown her. Still she had reminded herself pretty damn quick that he wasn’t something to fear when she’d pushed him to the ground and informed him he was beneath her. Almost instantly the Big Bad persona he had spent so many years building had dissolved and he was back to being poncy William, the bloody awful poet who’d had his heart ripped out by the woman he’d openly confessed his feelings to back when he still had a heart that beat. God he hadn’t changed at all had he?

Regardless of what she may have been feeling earlier he guessed that wasn’t what had her in such a mess now. She made no move to turn him away or go back inside, instead just sitting with him and he couldn’t help but smile slightly at being so close to her when she was so vulnerable.

He spent every night, or rather day in his case, fantasising about her, about being with her, fighting her, shagging her and sometimes just talking with her. It didn’t matter as long as he was with her. As soon as the sun set he would go out and check on her, follow her around and watch as she patrolled, sometimes stepping in pretending to be the hero, even though he knew she could take care of herself, then when she was at home he would spend hours by the tree under her window, imagining her getting dressed before bed, if she was with soldier boy he would torture himself listening to them having sex, imagining that the half-hearted cries she made were real screams for him. He looked up at the barely visible stars as he thought about how completely buggered he was. He couldn’t just be him anymore. Everything was about her.

They sat there silently for what seemed like hours before Buffy spoke. It was so soft it was barely a hoarse whisper but after so long in silence it was like a shout and he started at the sound, whipping his head around to look at her.

‘It’s my Mom. She’s sick; all those headaches she said were nothing might be something. I came home tonight to find her packing. She’s going to the hospital for tests, a cat scan; they’re going to keep her overnight.’

She said all this while still staring straight ahead. The tears had stopped and she finally felt like she could speak without starting to cry again. She wasn’t quite sure why she confided in him. Maybe because he had tried to be there for her, because he was still here, because she felt if she didn’t talk about it to someone she’d implode. She could feel his eyes on her, knew he was looking at her with his head tilted and half hidden by the collar of his coat. He said nothing, just looked at her, waiting for her to continue. She took a deep breath before speaking again.

“I don’t know what to do. There’s nothing I can do. My Mom is….she’s hurting….she’s in trouble and there isn’t anything I can do to stop it.”

Choking back a sob, she took another deep breath and raised her hands up to hold her hair back from her face, elbows on her knees, forcing back the tears that were threatening to spill over her again. She realised she was shaking from the effort, but she wouldn’t cry again, she wouldn’t.

Spike looked on as she fought for control. The news about Joyce had upset him too he realised, although he didn’t show it. He really liked the lady, liked all the Summers women actually, and not just because of Buffy. Joyce and Dawn never made him feel like a monster, not that he knew much about Dawn but Joyce had always offered him a cup of hot chocolate when he needed it and listened as he poured his heart out about Dru. No wonder Buffy was in such a state, if her Mum’s illness was serious enough to warrant a cat scan it didn’t look good. Buffy felt helpless and thanks to those Initiative wankers Spike knew all about helplessness. It wasn’t a nice feeling, especially for a master vampire like him and he couldn’t imagine it was much better for a slayer either.

He started to speak but had to clear his throat when all that came out was a hoarse whisper from spending so long in silence. He tried again.

“When…um…do you have to go?”

She sat up straight again and sighed, her voice still shaky as she answered.

“First thing in the morning. Dawn’s spending the night with her friend. I’ll collect her on the way to take her to the hospital to visit Mom.”

He nodded then thoughtfully.

“She’ll be fine Buffy, really she will. You Summers women are tough an’ I should know.”

“My Mom’s not a slayer Spike.”

“No, but she doesn’t have to be. Don’t you remember parent teacher night? When she hit me over the head with an axe an’ told me to get the hell away from you? Bloody scary she was an’ I was the Big Bad vamp without a chip in his head back then.”

Buffy couldn’t help a grin from spreading across her face at the memory and she let out a small choked laugh.

“Yeah, you were pretty scared looking all right, you were all set to bag your third slayer ‘til she showed up. Nothing fazed you about fighting me but Mom with an axe and you run off as fast as you can.”

She laughed again thinking how ridiculous it had been, she was at his mercy but faced with both of them he had decided it was better to turn tail and run. She’d never been happier to have her mother around as she was right then. It didn’t seem to matter that she was the Slayer then, she was a scared girl and her mother had saved her. She remembered Joyce’s words then. ‘No one hurts my little girl.’ God she couldn’t lose her, she wasn’t ready for that, she needed her mother.Spike was right though. Joyce was tough; she would beat this, wouldn’t she?

Spike could see her change in attitude from humour to sadness and then back to worry. He was glad he’d made her laugh, made her smile. That never happened because of him and he felt overwhelmingly happy that for just an instant he had cheered her up.

“She’s real special your Mum. The way she made me cups of hot chocolate with those little marshmallows and listened to me pour my heart out over Dru even though she’d only met me the once and it was when she found out vamps were real and you had to go fight the great poof to save the world. Lot to take in but she dealt and she accepted me even after so long. Considering the circumstances I wouldn’t have expected her to be so friendly.”

Buffy looked at him then, curiosity evident on her face.

“What?”

She studied him a moment longer and he shifted uncomfortably under her gaze.

“Seriously, what?”

“Why did you sit there drinking hot chocolate and talking with my Mom? You had access to our house; she trusted you and you didn’t try to kill her. Why?”

“Was waiting for you to show up wasn’t I. Knew you’d rush right over. Needed your help getting that stuff for the spell and wasn’t going to get it if I offed your Mum was I?”

“Okay so you couldn’t kill her, doesn’t mean you had to sit there chatting like old friends. My Mom’s no agony aunt Spike. I expected you to have her tied up at least.”

“Yeah well, to be honest us havin’ a cosy chat wasn’ what I had in mind either. Jus’ was upset over Dru. I was a complete mess then Slayer you know that. Had a chat with Red about it too. Guess I felt like talkin’ to anyone who’d listen. Your mum was been all nice, soon as she asked how I’d been it all came out, next thing I know she’s offerin’ hot chocolate and consoling me. Reckon that’s why I could never hurt her. Never met a woman like her before, strong, caring, and accepting. Gotta admire that about her.”

Buffy felt tears rising again but fought them back. She realised the new swell of emotion wasn’t sadness at the thought that the woman Spike was describing might disappear from her life, rather it was that he had seen her Mom that way. Her once mortal enemy knew what kind of person Joyce was and he cared about her. Those qualities were exactly what Buffy loved about her Mom too and what she hoped to be like. The fact that her Mom could have affected an evil vampire like that was amazing, that the vampire in question was a little odd, wait, more than a little, he was seriously weird, was beside the point. Spike didn’t have a chip or a soul back then, he could have easily killed her mother whenever he felt like it but he hadn’t because he liked her.

Spike was a confusing vamp for sure, she found herself thinking. All the little habits he had and the quirks they’d discovered while holding him hostage when he first got the chip had amazed her and the gang, Giles especially. There was nothing in the Watcher’s diaries hinting that vamps watched television, ate food when they only needed blood to survive or listened to punk music when they were turned way before that sort of stuff existed. He was an anomaly and Buffy had no doubt that if he wasn’t such an annoying, evil pig, Giles would have taken the time to study him and find out all he could about vamp culture. Angel had never hinted at anything like a vamp having an interest in pop culture or doing anything besides feeding and causing havoc. Okay she really shouldn’t be comparing Spike and Angel. Angel had a soul and Spike was evil still, neutered or not.

But he was here, with her, comforting her, and cheering her up. What the hell was happening here?

“You know I had been wondering that actually.”

Buffy looked at him thoroughly confused and wondering if she had been thinking out loud.

“Huh?”

He looked at her with his head tilted as though he was pondering something.

“That permanent invite I seem to have to your house.”

Oh, she thought. Then her eyes widened dramatically. Oh!

He hurried to reassure her, scared she was going to flip at realising her enemy was free to enter her home, rightfully so he couldn’t help admitting, although not for the reason she thought, and reach for a stake.

“Not that you have anything to worry about Slayer, I mean hello, chipped remember? Couldn’t hurt any of you if I wanted to, which I don’t of course, I mean, if we were still enemies then yeah but we’re not anymore, I mean not really you know, now I can’t fight and if I could I still wouldn’t cos I’d want a fair fight you know. More fun that way and like I said I like your mum and the kid isn’t involved really so no danger there. Just was wondering why you didn’t revoke my invitation like you did Peaches was all.”

Whew that was scary. Plus he’d probably just bolloxed up any chance of keeping his invitation now he’d reminded her of it but he hoped distracting her with why she hadn’t when he was still dangerous might gloss over that particular little detail.

Buffy listened to his rambling assurances while her mind raced. She hadn’t revoked his invitation the first time because of the truce, or not so much the truce as the deal.

“We had a deal. You help me stop Angelus then take Dru and leave Sunnydale forever. Wasn’t expecting you back. Plus I kind of skipped town after sending my boyfriend to hell and it was a while before I came back. I guess I sort of forgot about it.”

Spike had an incredulous look on his face. Okay so she had forgotten an evil and highly dangerous vamp, second worse vamp in history according to the Watcher’s diaries, Scourge of Europe and a member of the Aurelian line had access to her home. Understandable he supposed given what she had said about running away, and he had promised never to come back… Wait a minute had she actually believed him? Well of course she had promised to stake him if he did so he had no intention of going back. That had only changed after Dru dumped him, and we all know why she did that don’t we he thought. Maybe he would have come back regardless of her threat or if Dru had been with him, seeing as he was covered with her and all. Had she trusted him?

‘Oh God, why didn’t I revoke his invitation?’ was the single thought running through Buffy’s mind.

Sure there was the deal but had she really trusted him not to come back, taken him at his word. She thought she had. She had trusted Spike’s word. That made her oh so uncomfortable. More to the point why didn’t she revoke it after that? He’d left again but this time there really was no excuse, no reason to believe he wouldn’t come back. And he had. Again and again and again until he’d become a regular in her life. Not once had she ever thought to do the disinvite spell. Sure he wasn’t a threat now with the chip and all but she hated him, there was no possible reason she would want him to have access to her home. This really was too much, she couldn’t deal with this. Was it possible she’d just never considered it a problem? There was so much wrong with that thought it made her head hurt.

Spike was astounded. He’d tried to explain why she never had him disinvited and never could come up with a reasonable theory. That she had just forgotten about it was bloody amazing. He really didn’t want to ruin this any more than he probably had but he couldn’t help it.

“So is that why Angel wasn’t invited back? Cos you forgot?”

She stared at him a minute before answering slowly and carefully.

“No. I didn’t really forget. I disinvited him because he became Angelus and he would have hurt my Mom and Dawn and me too if he had half a chance. When he came back it took a long time to rebuild that trust we used to have and we weren’t seeing each other anymore so there didn’t seem to be a reason to invite him in. He never came around anymore. Then you showed up and he couldn’t get in to help Mom. I remembered I’d never invited him back but now he wasn’t Angelus I could. It would be dangerous if he couldn’t get in when my family was in trouble and I wasn’t around.”

‘For instance if a certain bleached blonde who could come and go as he pleased decided to turn up again,’ she thought wryly.

Yep major brain pain at that thought. She couldn’t understand it. To be honest now that she thought about it why hadn’t Angel asked her about Spike being inside her house? Unless he just assumed Joyce had been the one to invite him in, in which case he probably assumed Buffy had removed that invite as soon as she got back home. She groaned inwardly at the thought.

Spike took it all in and tried to process it. He understood what she meant about not letting Angel back in but would that mean that if he hadn’t shown up like he did, tall, dark and brooding might never have gotten his invite back? Now there was something to think about.

Buffy was looking increasingly troubled by the topic and he decided he had pushed his luck enough for tonight. He stood up and missed the startled expression on her face as he made to move away from her.

“Well, I…uh…had better be going. It’s really late and you need to get some sleep before you go to the hospital in the morning. Reckon you’ve got a long day ahead of you so…yeah. G’night Buffy.”

He picked up his gun and started to walk off.

“Wait!”

Buffy was suddenly very reluctant to see him go. She thought of going back into the house alone and she knew the minute she did it would all come back. The reality of her Mom’s illness would wash over her like a bucket of icy cold water and there was no way she was getting any sleep tonight whether she needed it or not. She knew thinking about it would lead to more tears and she was done crying tonight. She needed a distraction, needed someone to be there and drive those horrible fears away until it was time to face them at the hospital.

Spike had stopped and turned around, looking at her expectantly. She stood up and felt a slight shiver run down her spine at a sudden breeze, realising it had gotten rather cold out but hadn’t noticed before with him there to shield her. And wasn’t that exactly what she was looking for now? About to ask him to do? Shield her? She looked at him gathering her courage before speaking.

“Spike, stay?” Every muscle in the bleached vampire’s body tensed. He stood stock still, gripping the gun so tightly he felt the metal begin to bend beneath his fingers. All he could do was stare at her in shock, not quite sure he’d heard her right.

Buffy held his gaze, feeling uncomfortable at his intense stare. Her head was lowered shyly but she kept her eyes focused on him as she shifted from one foot to the other, her courage slipping away with each passing second. God she wished he’d say something, move at least. Time had seemed to stop and she didn’t think it would ever start again the way he was looking at her.

Spike finally came back to his senses as he noticed her becoming more and more nervous. Why was she nervous he wondered?

Because she asked you to stay and you’ve done nothing but stare at her like an idiot, that’s why, his brain told him.

Had she really asked him to stay? It was unlikely, but…

“What?” he asked, suddenly feeling the need to wet his lips and discovering his mouth had gone dry.

“I asked if you’d stay.”

Bloody hell! He wasn’t imagining it. She really had asked him.

“You…you want me to…stay?”

She nodded and gulped a huge breath of air. Would he agree? Would he think she’d gone nuts? Would he laugh and stalk off with a cruel insult? He looked completely dumbfounded.

“Sure. Yeah I can…I can stay. You’re sure you want me to?”

She nodded again, releasing the breath she hadn’t realised she’d been holding so long.

Spike blinked in a total daze as to what was happening. He shifted about, unsure what to do with his hands and remembering he still had the gun decided to deal with that first.

“Eh right then. Right I’ll just…”

He unloaded the gun, keeping his eyes lowered the entire time, then put the shells in his pocket and hid the weapon in the bushes where it wouldn’t be found. He’d get it later when he left. When exactly was he going to leave? The sun would be up in a few hours. How long did she want him to stay?

He chanced a quick glance in her direction. She’d moved back onto the porch and hovered somewhere between the steps and the door. She looked up at him and seemed as unsure and confused as he felt. After a number of glances at him, the steps and the door, she hugged herself tightly as another gust of wind blew over them and made her decision. With a determined expression she opened the door and walked into the kitchen, turning to face him and giving him a quick nod before walking further in, leaving the door open for him to follow.

Swallowing a few times, Spike made his mind up and began to move forward. When he reached the door he stopped. This was more than he’d ever expected. Buffy had invited him in for no other reason than for his company, for someone to talk to. He felt a tremble run through him and looked over at her as she stood by the kitchen island waiting for him. He held her gaze as he took hold of the door handle, stepped inside and closed it quietly behind him.

Chapter 2

The almost inaudible click as the door closed seemed to echo between them. A line had just been crossed. Not the first, and probably not the last, but right now it seemed the most significant. Something was changing and they both felt it. It was terrifying but strangely comforting. Neither of them knew what to do and as Spike took a seat beside Buffy at the island they both stared at the smooth surface of the worktop with thoughts running madly through their heads.

I asked Spike into my house. It’s not like he didn’t have an open invitation anyway but still. I asked him in. He’s here beside me. My mortal enemy, or once mortal enemy. Wait shouldn’t that be immortal? I mean I’m human and he could kill me but he’s a vampire so he’s immortal so doesn’t that make him my immortal enemy or how does that work exactly?

What am I thinking about. I’m babbling inside my own head about language and word usage when I should be focusing on the fact that I just asked Spike into my house to stay with me. The sun will be up in a few hours. What am I gonna do kick him out?

She began arguing with herself as a little voice in her head tried to point a few things out to her.

No you won’t kick him out because you knew when you decided you wanted him to stay that you wanted him here ‘til you had to go to the hospital. You don’t want him to leave. Which means he’s gonna have to stay here all day or make a dash for the sewers without turning to dust.

I don’t want him dust.

Buffy stilled at that last thought. Her eyes grew wide and she was glad that Spike seemed too caught up in his own thoughts to notice.

I don’t want him dust. I don’t want Spike dust. Spike and dust equals not good. Since when did I start thinking like that? No wait I know what this is. Spike is here for me. I’m upset about my Mom and he caught me at a vulnerable time. I just don’t want him dust right now because I ne.., I want him here to talk to and to distract me. Which he’s certainly proving useful at. I haven’t thought about the impending trip of doom for a while. Which means when all this is over I can just go back to hating him and…and I can…turn the vampire I turned to for help to dust without a second thought if I have to. Yeah, right.

Buffy’s face soured at the realisation that no matter how much he infuriated her there was no way she could be heartless enough to dust him after tonight. Let’s face it she didn’t have the heart to do it once he got that chip. All those threats were just empty. She couldn’t harm a defenceless creature. But if he ever got the chip out all bets were off. Would that still be the case now? Buffy wasn’t sure.

She sighed. Things were getting really complicated.

Spike’s mind had been travelling down a similarly complicated path.

Okay, I’m sitting in Buffy’s kitchen beside the girl herself who invited me in. I must be dreaming. No way this is really happening right? But it smells real enough, sounds real enough, feels real enough. Bloody hell I’m gonna be pissed if this is another sodding dream.How long am I here for? Will she come to her senses in the morning when she has to face what’s happening to her mum? Will the sun remind her who she is and what she’s s’posed to be doing? Don’ like that thought. That could lead to a punch in the nose and gettin’ tossed out the door to burn. Maybe she’ll give me a blanket, won’t want me to burn even if she does kick me out, unless she gets mad over earlier in the alley, what I said ‘bout slayers.

He couldn’t help but grin at the irony.Bleedin’ hell some Big Bad I turned out to be. Slayer of Slayers. Toughest, meanest and baddest vamp around. Better track record than anyone when it came to doin’ in slayers. Hardly any vamps managed to off one unless they were lucky or the girl was fresh, or both. Sure I got Aurelian blood in me an’ I’m older than most survive but I’m not all that old an’ I offed my first slayer when I was little more ’n a fledge. All set up an’ ready to get my third and look what happens. Go against everythin’ in my nature to make a truce with her which is all that ponce’s fault. Come back for revenge with the Gem of Amarra an’ get my arse royally kicked an’ then get a bloody chip put in my head by the slayer’s newest boy, making me a completely useless demon ‘til I go an’ bloody well fall in love with her.

Only it didn’t just happen like that did it Spikey? You felt something for her from the start. Not love but something. Lust. You wanted her the minute you saw her dancing with her friends in the Bronze an’ it only grew more intense when you fought her at the school. Came close to doin’ her in then ‘til her mum showed up didn’ you, and again at Halloween. You had her right there helpless and begging to be finished off but no. Ol’ Spike has to gloat, take his time, breath in her scent, savour the feel of her under him. Yeah you know you were hard with that hot little body pressed under you, heart galloping a mile a minute. Took your time and the spell broke an’ once again you got your ass kicked and had to run off like a coward. Humiliated you she did. Broke your sodding legs an’ put you in a wheelchair to suffer, then went an’ brought Angelus back to torture you, though you can’t really blame her for that. Not like she knew after all but you did then didn’ you? Blamed her for everythin’. It was the truce that did it. You saw her then. Her strength. Goin’ against someone she loved. Course you walked off with Dru an’ left her there thinkin’ she was gonna die but you were tryin’ to hide it weren’t you? Didn’ care about her long as you had Dru. Sorry you wouldn’ be the one to do it but better to get out while you could.

Spike remembered how he’d felt when he knew she’d survived. World hadn’t ended. She stopped Angelus. He heard through the demon grapevine about how she’d killed Angel and all he’d felt was awe, sheer and utter awe at being able to kill someone that meant so much to her because of what she was and what she was expected to do. He could never have done that if it was him and Dru. Never.

All those arguments I had with Dru, all the torture she put me through. All because she knew. Knew what I felt for Buffy. Yeah I was impressed by her, proud even. Gave me an excuse for not bein’ able to kill her when she could do somethin’ like that to someone she loved. Of course I was obsessed. Might have tried ignoring it, refusing to go back there but I thought about her every day, revenge, amazement, wistfulness. Every emotion. The one that got away because she was, no, is the best. I finally met my match and thanks to the chip we never are gonna settle who’s better. Not that I could now anyway. Royally fucked up by falling in love with her. Always have to do it don’ I? Desire the unattainable, attracted to the best, Cecily, Dru an’ now the Slayer. Only she’s better than any of ‘em. She’s everything I’m not. The bloody definition of good versus evil here and who ever heard of evil fallin’ for good? Nothing is ever gonna be simple anymore where she’s concerned.

Spike sighed. Things were getting really, really complicated.

The two blondes sat in silence contemplating what they had admitted to themselves. It wasn’t uncomfortable anymore, sitting beside each other. Strangely they were both at ease now in a companionable silence. It was kind of…nice.

Buffy turned to look at Spike as he stared out the kitchen window and he slowly turned his head to face her. When she didn’t look away he gave her a tiny smile and to his delight and surprise she returned it. They turned away again to face the window once more.

After a minute Buffy remembered something and she hopped up off her seat startling the vamp beside her.

“Um I just remembered I never offered you anything and I know you like hot chocolate, I think Mom bought some more of those little marshmallows and I could really use a sugar rush right now. You um want any?”

Spike could hardly believe it. Buffy was offering to make him hot chocolate with marshmallows because she knew he liked it? This was surreal.

“Yeah pet. I’d love some.”

“Great.”

Buffy grinned at him and busied herself with making two cups of warm, chocolaty goodness.

It felt good to do something normal, domestic. She was treating him like any other houseguest and it was making her feel miles better to be doing something so simple. The easy way with which he accepted her offer was helping too. He was as lost as her in this new situation they found themselves in but he was going along with it and trying to make it as normal as possible the way she was. If he had given her that look that said she was stark raving mad and maybe he should call the loony bin right now or suggested she go get some sleep as that’s what was causing her change in attitude towards him she would have fallen into that helpless and vulnerable position she’d been in when he first got there. She needed to be understood and she needed to feel useful. She couldn’t do anything about her mother and wouldn’t know anything until after they got the results of the tests they were going to do at the hospital but she could take care of a guest in her house and keep herself busy until then.

“There,” she said, plopping two steaming mugs on the counter, “not as good as my Mom’s probably but still yummy and calorie filled. Not that you have to worry about that of course.”

Spike grinned at her and picked up his mug, gingerly taking a sip of the hot liquid and letting it warm his throat, feeling it come to settle in his stomach.

“It’s lovely pet. Cheers.”

Buffy smiled and sat down opposite him this time and began drinking her own, blowing on it to cool it slightly.

“So…” Spike said.

“So…” Buffy answered.

They looked at each other at a loss for conversation. What should they talk about? They’d never run out of words before but it wasn’t like they could insult each other with their usual banter now and he knew she didn’t want to talk about her Mom. What had happened earlier between them was unpleasant although it hadn’t started out that way so it probably wasn’t a good idea to mention it.

Buffy cringed slightly at the memory of shoving him to the ground, throwing her money at him and telling him he was beneath her. She had been so angry at what he’d told her. He had frightened her and only the realisation he still had the chip had given her the courage to shove him away, remembering that he couldn’t hurt her now. She knew he was her match and the fact he’d killed two slayers before gave him the credentials to be the one that ended her life. If an eighties reject like the vamp that staked her had gotten that close because of a slip on her part then there was no question Spike would have slipped in and had himself one hell of a good day if he’d been able. What really frightened her though was the moment after he’d said it, when she was rooted to the spot as though in his thrall and he’d leaned forward. It was crazy but she was almost positive that he’d been about to kiss her, what scared her more was the knowledge that for a split second she had hesitated before moving away. He didn’t have a thrall that she knew of but for a moment she had felt powerless to him and all her anger had boiled up. She did, had wanted it sometimes. The release that came with death, but he wasn’t going to be the one. She wouldn’t let it be him. He wouldn’t win. And so she had shoved him away and left him there. For a minute she imagined she heard a sob behind her but pushed the ridiculous idea behind. He was a killer and he was evil, he deserved to lie in the gutter.

Only he doesn’t deserve it does he? Her mind argued. You’re sitting here with him sharing your problems that you haven’t even mentioned to your friends yet, not to mention Riley, wherever he is. After everything you’ve done to him, every nasty word and insult, he put away his anger to help you.

“Spike, I’m…I’m sorry.”

He looked at her sharply. She had her head bent down, looking into her mug. He was about to ask her what she meant but she cut him off.

“I’m sorry about earlier. What I said. I was angry and I took it out on you because you told me the truth. I came to you looking for answers and you gave them to me. It’s not your fault I didn’t like what I heard. You were right. You scared me. You didn’t deserve to be treated like that regardless of what you are. I’m sorry.”

Okay now this really was too much. Had reality shifted at some point. It would explain the weirdness going on around here. Buffy was apologising to him. What bizzare world was this? She must really be distraught to be apologising to Spike for being her usual righteous self. Not that he wasn’t happy with her current treatment of him but this wasn’t the slayer he knew and it was making him nervous.

“Don’t apologise Slayer. You were right. I was out of line. Yeah you didn’t like what you heard but I shouldn’t have tried to scare you so much and God knows I had no business tryin’ to intimidate you like that. Helpless when it comes to humans and I go runnin’ my mouth off to the Slayer. Trust me I was asking for it.”

“You’re not beneath me Spike and it was wrong to say you were. Sure we hate each other and yes you can’t hurt me with that chip but without it you’ve given me some of the best fights of my life and we never did get to finish them. You do realise you’re my longest lasting enemy so far, right? Most don’t make it through a year.”

“You’re good Summers I’ll admit. Thanks for the unexpected ego boost but the only reason I’ve lasted so long is cos I know when to run, not to mention the chip. Sorta puts a damper on being your enemy when I can’t do anythin’ to you.”

“Huh, I never would have taken you for the modest type Spike. Who knew? It’s important to know when to run. I would have been dead a hundred times over if I didn’t know when to call it quits and most of the times I got the upper hand with you was because you got me seriously pissed off. You really have a talent for that.”

“My bloody undoin’ pet. Can’t resist gettin’ you all worked up like that in a fight. Puts a fire in your eyes and the demon in me jus’ goes hell yeah, there’s my girl. This slayer’s a real challenge.”

“Always did enjoy kicking your ass.”

“Still do.”

“Yeah, I guess I do, huh?”

“Sure as hell feels like you do. Glutten for punishment I am. Know it’s a bad idea but I still can’t resist pissing you off and seeing you all mad and self-righteous. Guess it reminds me of the old days and lets me know I can still get under your skin.”

Boy could he, Buffy thought. He could really get to her and all it would take was a single smirk or cocky word and she was as riled as she could be. Whatever he said or did would annoy her so much she couldn’t help but hit out at him and then replay the moment in her head over and over all day.

She realised they’d finished their drinks and glancing over at the sink saw that the dishes hadn’t been done and were stacked up in the sink waiting to be washed. She let out a groan followed by a resigned sigh and stood up.

“What’s up luv?”

“Dishes need washing. One of my favourite chores. I’m pretty sure Dawn was supposed to do them after dinner but surprise surprise it looks like she forgot,” Buffy replied as she brought their mugs over to the pile and began filling the sink with water and rolling up her sleeves.

“Need help?”

Buffy was a little stunned and turned to face him, a sceptical look on her face and one eyebrow raised.

“You want to help wash up? You do dishes?”

“Well doin’ the dishes for me usually means rinsing out a glass or two but I can wash up and I will help. I can dry if you like. Get it done faster.”

Buffy thought about it for a second and decided it was probably better than leaving him sitting there doing nothing.

“Ok, sure. Grab a towel over there and get drying.”

Spike grinned, relieved to be able to help and happy to stand beside her. It was another moment of domestic bliss he was unused to but found he enjoyed. It was a novelty at least.

“Want some music?” Buffy asked nodding at the stereo next to her.

“Sure.”

Buffy turned on the radio and after flicking through several stations found one that was relatively lively and upbeat considering the early hour. She realised the sky was starting to lighten and that daylight was approaching and it made her sad. She didn’t want the night to end yet. Just for this moment she was free and she was enjoying it.

Spike noticed her suddenly melancholy mood as she looked out at the slowly brightening sky. Morning was fast approaching and soon she’d be off to see her mum in the hospital. He worried about her not having slept at all, knowing she’d be completely exhausted with what she had yet to face but figured sleep wouldn’t have come even if he hadn’t been there. He hated to think what sort of a state she might have gotten into left alone in the house by herself.

As she finished washing up and passed the last of the dishes to Spike to dry she pulled the plug and watched all the water drain out of the sink. Seeing it get sucked up into the deep, black hole reminded her of the Hellmouth on which they lived. Her life was about fighting demons but now she found it rocked by something normal. All she wanted was to have a normal life but now she was being threatened by something normal people dealt with that she was powerless to stop. There was nothing mystical about her Mom’s illness and knowing that made Buffy feel helpless again. She couldn’t go out fighting demons while her Mom needed her and she couldn’t do anything to help her Mom. She felt completely useless. She brought her hand to her mouth and tried to smother a sob. God she was going to cry again.

In the next instant she felt strong arms wrapping around her, pulling her against a firm stable body and she relaxed against it fully. Spike tightened his hold on her and Buffy let go completely, burying her face in his chest and letting the tears flow from her. She sobbed loudly and her body shook, she gripped his t-shirt tightly, afraid to let go as she fell apart in his arms. He supported her weight and she felt him run his hand up and down her back and then begin to rub soothing circles across her shoulders. He lowered his head so his mouth was just above her ear and he made soothing noises.

“Shh Buffy. It’s alright. I’ve got you. It’ll be ok. You can do this. I’ve got you Buffy. I’ve got you.”

He had. He had her and she wanted to stay in his arms. She let everything she’d been feeling since her Mom told her the news pour out knowing that he would keep holding her through it until she had let it all go.

After a while she stopped shaking and her sobs began to die down. She continued to grip his shirt tightly with her head buried against his chest and noticed that he had been gently rocking her from side to side. Soon her remaining sobs turned into small sniffles and she began to become aware of her surroundings once more.

She noticed his scent as she breathed in and out. Cigarettes, alchohol, leather and something else. Something unique. The scent of Spike. He smelled wonderful and she inhaled again, a deep breath, breathing him in. His shirt was soaked from her tears and she could feel his muscular body as her hands rested against the soft fabric. He continued stroking her back and she revelled in the feel of him against her, holding her so tenderly.

The music had changed to something slower and Spike began to sway them both in time to the sounds coming from the stereo. Soon they were moving slowly together in the kitchen, dancing. A different dance to what they usually took part in. No fighting or verbal sparring. Just moving together, two people swaying to their own beat. She felt her hands move up and down his chest and she vaguely wondered what she was doing. He felt so good, she couldn’t help it. She wanted to feel more of him.

Spike let out a low moan as she began trailing her hands up and down his chest, moving up to his shoulders and back down his arms, then back up again until they came to rest about his neck. Slowly she brought her head up to look at him and he stared down into her watery hazel eyes. God she was beautiful. He knew he could get lost in her eyes. Who was he kidding? He was lost, utterly lost to her.

Buffy’s breathing quickened as she looked up into his deep blue gaze. She knew she should stop this. Pull away, but she couldn’t. She felt like she had back in the alley when he made a move as if to kiss her and she had hesitated, as if she was under some kind of thrall. The voice in her head telling her to move away and let go of him was being ignored by her body which seemed to want to grip him tighter. The way he was looking at her was so intense.

Time seemed to have stopped and she could no longer hear the music as she stared back at him. Slowly she drew closer to him and he began lowering his head to hers, tightening his arms around her, bringing her closer to him. They were centimeters apart, still looking into each other’s eyes and Buffy shivered when she felt his lips brush against hers. It was barely a touch but she felt it with every fibre of her being and her lips stung with hot need from where he’d touched her. She felt him tremble before moving in again, this time pressing his lips to hers and holding them there before moving away again. He was going to kill her if he kept that up. Each touch was torture making her long for more and she found herself moving forward in search of his mouth as she brought their lips together a third time for a longer, deeper kiss.

Spike moaned against her mouth, feeling the heat radiating from her and washing over him. He couldn’t believe he was kissing Buffy and she was kissing him back. This was heaven. He overcame his initial hesitancy when he felt her respond to him, apparently with no intention of moving away and he became more daring, running his tongue along her lips and then sucking her bottom lip into his mouth and nibbling on it. He was rewarded when she gasped and moaned against him, tilting her head back and leaning into the kiss. They were so caught up in each other they didn’t notice the trail of smoke rising up around them.

Spike had never felt anything like her. He was sure he was going to burn up from kissing her. He dimly became aware of a stinging sensation along the side of his face that was gradually becoming more painful and difficult to ignore. He soon realised what was happening when a flame erupted from his cheek and he jumped back with a shout from the sunlight pouring through the window. Cursing furiously he ducked back into the shelter of the house and hurridly extinguished his burning cheek. Bloody brilliant. He was lucky he’d moved away when he did. The burn wasn’t too bad and would heal quickly. He was more furious at having been interrupted from such an unexpectedly intimate moment with the Slayer.

Buffy had come to her senses with a shock when Spike suddenly tore himself away from her. Looking on as he attempted to put out the mini fire on his face reality came crashing down on her and the little voice in her brain that had seemed so muffled when she’d lost herself in his kisses began screaming at her.

“This is wrong! This is wrong! This is wrong!”

Oh God she’d kissed Spike. What was she thinking? She hadn’t been thinking, simple as. She’d only felt, wanted, taken. She’d given herself to him and it had been wonderfully freeing. No it was wrong! He was her enemy, she wanted him here as a distraction, as someone to talk to, not a shoulder to cry on, not to kiss. That was why she had Riley. Oh God Riley! What had she done?

Spike took one look at her distraught face and knew it was over. Whatever had happened had ended and the harsh light of day had reminded her of what he was. He prepared to be tossed out into the sun and wondered if he could make it into the sewers without a blanket.

Buffy attempted to still her pounding heart and compose herself. She had to think, had to concentrate. As the sun poured further light into the kitchen one thought entered into Buffy’s head and she regained her focus.

“Mom. It’s morning. I have to get ready. I…I have to go to the hospital.”

Spike nodded, surprised she still hadn’t kicked him out. In fact she was making her way past him and heading for the stairs.

“Uh right. I guess I should go then. You wouldn’t happen to have a blanket I could borrow?”

Buffy stopped with her foot on the steps.

“Huh?”

“You know a blanket so I don’t burst into flames…again.”

“Oh right.”

Spike shifted uncomfortably.

“You know what it’s fine. I’ll be fine. I’ll just go.”

He set off back towards the door avoiding the sunlight streaking through the windows and Buffy panicked. He was leaving. That was of the good, but she didn’t want him to dust outside. Why did the thought of him leaving upset her after what they’d just done? She should be glad to see him go.

“Spike wait, don’t go.”

He stopped and jerked around to look at her in amazement.

“I mean you don’t have to…It’s just I don’t want you to burn up out there and…well…I’ll be at the hospital all day so you can stay here if you like. You know until the sun goes down and you can leave without the threat of a fiery death. Or you know, whenever. I’m sure you left a blanket here somewhere after your last visit and if you can find it then, you know, you could go but I’m in a hurry so I can’t help you look and…I gotta go get ready.”

And with that the Slayer flew up the stairs to shower and get ready leaving Spike standing in the hall stunned and confused and elated all at once.

Chapter 3

Spike had found his blanket down in the basement. He wasn’t quite sure when he’d left it here but it was nice to think they’d kept it for him. He smirked, knowing they probably just kept it as a spare blanket. No need to let it go to waste even if it was a bit tatty. Any thoughts that Spike might need it next time he popped around for a visit hardly would have entered their minds.

Buffy had run off to the hospital a little while ago. She’d rushed out the door throwing a quick glance in his direction and was gone. She’d left him alone in her house. Maybe she was going to pretend nothing had happened. She was being nice to him now until she had some space to think of an excuse for what they’d done and as soon as she did he fully expected a fuming Slayer to beat him to a pulp for taking advantage of her. Either that or just ignore him altogether. Spike didn’t know which was worse.

Sighing to himself he picked up his blanket and headed for the front door. He opened it and prepared for a mad dash to the sewers but stopped when a thought occurred to him. He was alone in Buffy’s house and it was by invitation. He’d snuck into her house before but always at the risk of being caught. Now he had full access to her home and he was just going to leave? He left the door ajar. He’d only be a minute. He wanted to look inside her bedroom, the room he spent so much time staring at from outside at night. The room he was forbidden to enter. He let the blanket drop to the floor as he made his way upstairs.

He slowly let the door to her bedroom swing open. He could smell her. A deliciously, fruity fragrance after her shower. He closed his eyes and inhaled deeply. He took in the sight before him. Clothes were tossed about where she had rushed to get dressed and he noticed a few stuffed animals lying around as well as crosses and bottles of holy water. Yep, this was Buffy’s room all right. A Slayer but girly too.

He walked around the room memorising every detail. Photos of Joyce, Dawn and the Scoobies were stuck to the wall as well as a few of the soldier boy. He snarled when he saw them. The kissing earlier had made him feel possessive and he struggled to prevent himself from ripping them up. He began moving about the room again turning his attention to her weapons chest and the few books scattered about on the shelves when something caught his eye. He stepped closer and couldn’t stop a smile playing across his lips at the sight of a small stuffed pig. How many times had she called him a pig and here she had one in her room, pride of place near her bed. Seems the Slayer wasn’t so put off by pigs after all. He ran his hands over a sweater he found tossed on the bed. It was so soft. He picked it up and brought it close to his face and was instantly hit with her scent. She’d worn it recently and he breathed her in, reminding himself of their kiss earlier and how she’d consumed his senses.

Downstairs Riley had arrived after going MIA all night. He was expecting a rush of questions as to where he’d been and what he’d been doing. He stopped when he noticed that the door was ajar. That was odd, why would they have left the door open?

“Hello? Buffy?”

There was no answer. Something didn’t feel right. He picked up a raggedy blanket off the floor and his suspicions rose. A noise upstairs grabbed his attention and he dropped the blanket, placing his jacket on the banister as he quietly made his way upstairs. He saw Buffy’s door open and moved closer, stopping when he recognised a familiar bleach-blonde head and black leather coat. Spike.

Riley was furious at the sight of the cocky vamp in his girlfriend’s room. He was still holding a grudge against the one demon who’d managed to escape him back at the Initiative as well as the feelings of betrayal when he found out Buffy and the Scoobies had been hiding him and protecting him from Riley and his men.

“What are you doing in here?” he asked in his most fed up and exasperated tone.

Spike spun round quickly hiding the sweater behind his back.

“What me? I was um uh…What are you doing here?”

Riley strutted into the room confidently. He had a reason and a right for being here and he could imagine what Buffy would say about this menace being in her room.

“Looking for the girl who’s going to rip your arms off when she finds out you were in her bedroom.”

Spike didn’t like the way the big hulking brute was moving closer to him. He had to think how to explain being here. Not that he was afraid, mind you, he just knew he had no way of defending himself other than verbally.

“Yeah well, me too.”

Riley glanced down at Spike’s hands hiding behind his back and tried to get a closer look which Spike avoided twisting away. Clearly he didn’t want to be caught with… Riley was confused and looked at Spike suspiciously.

“Were you? Were you just smelling her sweater?”

Spike shifted uncomfortably.

“Pfft no.”

Riley put his hands on his hips and stared at Spike.

“Well, yeah, alright, I did. Right, it’s a predator thing, nothin’ wrong with it jus’ know your enemy’s scent. Whet the appetite for a hunt, y’know,” he took in a big sniff of Buffy’s sweater, “hoh that’s the stuff, Slayer musk it’s bitter an’ aggravating Grrrr.”

He took in another big breath before Riley whipped the garment out of his hands. He grabbed Spike by the coat, roughly.

“Out!”

Spike scowled as Riley pulled him towards the door, noticing one of the Slayer’s knickers sticking out of a drawer which he pulled out as he was dragged out into the hall, quickly stuffing them in his pocket. Might as well grab a souvenir while he had the chance.

“Hey, watch it, easy you pri… you’re bruising the leather.”

As soon as they reached the bottom of the stairs Riley tossed Spike away from him and towards the door. The vamp had other ideas, pulling back and shrugging his jacket back into place.

“Look, I know for a bleeding fact the slayer wouldn’t mind me bein’ here.”

Riley tossed him a highly sceptical look.

“Right, what’s a little sweater sniffing between sworn enemies.”

Spike tilted his head and pursed his lips. Time for some revenge.

“Your girl in the habit of buying her enemies drinks, cos she spent the better part of last night with me, doin’ just that.”

Spike smirked and tilted his head the other way in satisfaction. Riley gave him a disbelieving look.

“Because you guys are such tight pals,” he said gesturing at Spike with his hands.

“Yeah.”

Riley grinned and shifted his hands back to his hips.

“That’s good. Tell me another.”

Spike was gonna enjoy this. The ponce might be puttin’ on a confident show but Spike knew he was getting to him and he knew just how to push the guy’s buttons. The conversation he had with Buffy popped into his head and he wasted no time in answering Riley.

“Oh kay how ‘bout this one,” he clicked his tongue glancing at the door before continuing, “twice in recent memory she’s had her lover wicca’s do a de-invite on the house, keep out specific vamps. Ever ask yourself why she’s never taken my name off the guest list?”

Spike leaned forward putting on his most innocent look, batting his eyelashes and waiting for the man to come up with an answer. Riley blinked. Buffy had Harmony and Dracula disinvited but not Spike. Why? He saw the way the vamp in question was looking at him in amused victory and he recovered quickly.

“Because you’re harmless.”

“Oh, yeah, right,” Spike scoffed, “Takes one to know I s’pose.”

Riley straightened his arms huffing while Spike slid his hands into his duster and lifted up his shoulders in a cocky, victorious gesture.

“Least I still got the attitude,” he sniffed, “What you got? Piercing glance? Face it white-bread, Buffy’s got a type and you’re not it. She likes us dangerous, rough, occasionally bumpy in the forehead region, not that she doesn’t like you, but sorry Charlie, you’re just not dark enough.”

That was it. Spike’s goading had done the trick, Riley was seriously pissed. All his insecurities rushed to the surface as he was reminded of Buffy’s relationship with Angel and he grabbed Spike by the collar, determined to wipe the self-assured grin off his face. He shoved him against the wall.

“He… Hey!” Spike shouted before panicking when Riley opened the door and shoved him into the sun, maintaining his grip on Spike’s jacket.

“Hey, hey,hey!”

“Am I dark enough for you now?” Riley asked.

Spike ignored the question, he wouldn’t give him the satisfaction. He struggled against the bigger man’s grip.

“Bloody, pull me back in you sod, I’m startin’ to sizzle.”

“You don’t know anything about Buffy. You never did. I’m the one that knows what she needs.”

Spike was getting tired of this macho display Riley was putting on to reassure his ego.

“Oh yeah. That’s why you’re at the hospital with her right now, giving her what she needs.”

Riley was thrown by that and pulled Spike back inside roughly.

“What are you talking about?”

Spike straightened and looked back just as confused. Sure Buffy was in a hurry but he figured she would have told commando boy where she was going.

“Don’t you know? Didn’t she tell you?”

Riley moved closer shoving away his hurt feeling that Spike seemed privy to information he should obviously know.

“You tell me.”

Spike shook his head, a little thrown himself. Riley didn’t know?

“Her Mum’s sickly. They took her to hospital for a bit of prod and poke. Bite-size one’s gone too. Yeah it’s…it’s funny her not calling you about that. I’ve known since last night.”

A bad idea maybe but Spike couldn’t help shoving it in the other man’s face. Riley was upset and Spike made him angrier gloating the way he did. Riley grabbed the vamp and tossed him out again.

“Hey, what, blanket, blanket!”

Riley kicked the blanket out and slammed the door. He didn’t think he could be more pissed off. What was Buffy doing? Why didn’t she tell him? More importantly why did she tell Spike?

Spike ran for the sewers with the blanket covering him. Captain Cardboard hadn’t known huh? Things were getting interesting around here. Maybe things with Buffy weren’t as hopeless as he thought. He grinned and away from the sunlight, sauntered off towards his crypt reliving the kiss earlier that morning.

***


Buffy was completely exhausted by the time they got home. She made sure Dawn was okay before heading back downstairs to straighten the house up a bit. She needed to keep busy. Dawn had just wanted to go straight to bed. The news of Joyce’s brain tumour threw them. Buffy had been in shock when the doctor told her. It had taken a while to sink in and she couldn’t answer any of his questions. Luckily the intern Ben had stepped in and given her the time she needed to process things.

The battle with the snake demon had been rough too. After having no sleep the chase and fight with it and Glory earlier really took its toll on her and her body was crying out for rest. But she couldn’t settle down yet. It had been too close. Glory almost found out about Dawn. She was getting closer and Buffy needed to focus on her Mom. There was too much to handle at once.

Then there was Riley. He’d shown up at the hospital and only then did Buffy realise she hadn’t told him about Joyce needing tests. She didn’t know what to tell him. It hadn’t occurred to her to call. She was too distracted. She tried to reassure him when he said he thought she’d need him but honestly seeing him only made her feel guilty about what had happened with Spike. She couldn’t think about that now. It was too complicated. Later as she’d watched Dawn head in to hear the news from Joyce she felt the strain again and struggled to keep her composure. Riley had held her and told her to let it out because he was there for her.

Immediately her mind conjured up a different body, a smaller one, more compact with leather clad arms surrounding her, the unique smell that mingled with cigarettes and alcohol wafting around her. The words too, so similar to the ones he had spoken in that seductive British accent.

She pulled away from him, making excuses that she couldn’t afford to fall apart because she wouldn’t be able to stop and they needed her to be strong for them now. It was true. She had to hold it in, at least until the end of the day when she could think about things while they slept. Only then would she be allowed to feel vulnerable. Her mother had called her then and she’d walked away from him, guilty that when he’d held her, she had wished for an instant that he was someone else, someone whom it had been so easy to show her weakness to and the last person who should have seen her so vulnerable.

When she finally couldn’t resist her body’s urgent need for rest she locked up, switched off the lights and made her way up to bed. She washed up, changed into her pyjamas and removed her make-up. Before she got into bed she went to stand by her partially open window. She was staring out at the dark and empty street when she felt something, a familiar tingle. Spike. Spike was outside and very close. She didn’t look for him, instead continuing to watch the street, letting his presence comfort her. Knowing she wasn’t alone she climbed into bed and focusing on the tell-tale tingles informing her Slayer’s sense that a vamp was nearby she managed to drift off into a much needed sleep.

Outside Spike stood by the tree that had become his regular spot at night and lit up a cigarette. He had watched her as she looked out her window before going to bed and had marvelled at how beautiful she looked in the moonlight. Of course he knew she was exhausted, he could see it in her face. He knew she’d had no sleep and a bruise on her shoulder suggested she’d been in a fight today. Probably venting some of her frustration out on some nasty that had crossed her path.

He also noticed the absence of one Mr. Riley Finn. Two nights in a row now, soldier boy was spending the night elsewhere and Spike was more than happy. He didn’t think he could handle the knowledge of the big brute putting his paws all over his Slayer. Yes she was his. Spike had spent all day thinking about that kiss and his possessiveness had grown. Once she got things sorted with her mum they were gonna have words. One way or another he was gonna find out what this meant. Something had changed and he wasn’t gonna let it go, he couldn’t.

For the rest of the night Spike kept watch under Buffy’s window until he felt daylight approach and then he reluctantly left. Time to head back to his crypt and listen to more of Harmony’s bitching about his absences lately. Spike didn’t think he could take much more of the chit’s complaining or her incessant prattle, not to mention the horrible décor now adorning his crypt. The sooner he got rid of her, the better.

***


The next day for Buffy was spent in the hospital taking care of her Mom. Dawn was there too and Willow dropped by for a visit bringing a few gifts to cheer them up. Joyce was spacing out more often as the tumour pressed on her brain and even blurted things out in a voice that sounded nothing like her own. Buffy was unnerved by it but tried to reassure Dawn it was okay and it was normal considering their Mom’s condition. There was a brief moment of tension when a crazy guy freaked Dawn out about not being real. Buffy had the feeling he knew what Dawn was, for some reason being out of touch with reality meant he could see through her. Luckily nothing had come of it and they managed to settle Dawn down.

Joyce had lost patience with the hospital and had made her mind up to come home while waiting for the operation. She was adamant that she couldn’t spend any longer in the hospital and even though Buffy was unsure if she could handle all the medication and settle Joyce down when she went into a daze she felt pressured by her Mom’s relief that she could go home and hurried to agree to do whatever it took as long as her Mom could wait at home. Gathering all their stuff the three headed home and Buffy got Joyce to bed without too much trouble although they had to keep the lights off because they were too bright for Joyce’s eyes.

Dawn and Buffy settled down in the darkened living room watching television when they heard a lot of noise coming from the kitchen. Joyce was taking out pots and pans and rooting through the fridge. She had the gas on and Buffy rushed to turn it off coughing.

“Mom what are you doing?”

Joyce turned around, a nasty look in her eyes at being questioned.

“I’m making breakfast. You shouldn’t eat any more, you’re disgustingly fat.”

Buffy didn’t know what to say. Dawn looked on slightly scared. Their Mom never acted this way. They knew it was the tumour but hearing her mother say that hurt Buffy. Joyce blinked and soon she was herself again, confused and apologising. Shrugging it off, Buffy took her Mom’s arm and together her and Dawn put Joyce back to bed. Joyce jumped when Dawn stroked her hair. It was like the man at the hospital. She told Dawn to get away from her, that she wasn’t real. Dawn ran into her room and Joyce was back to normal wondering what had happened. Buffy settled her in before going to check on Dawn.

She found her upset in her room, holding back tears. It took time but Buffy explained that their Mom didn’t hate her, it was the tumour and whatever had happened with those other people Dawn told her about meant nothing, that she was real and everything would be okay. Buffy had a sinking feeling that anyone with mental problems could see Dawn for what she really was and that was dangerous. She’d have to discuss it with Giles later.

Once she had Dawn settled for the night, Buffy headed downstairs and began washing the dishes. Upstairs she could hear her mother rambling on as though talking to a strange intruder. She turned the radio on to drown out the noise and loud, lively music filled the air. She focused on washing up and memories of a similar night flooded her memory. A night when Spike had been here beside her drying the dishes as she passed them to him, right before he held her as she broke down. But she was alone now and knowing her mother was upstairs talking away in her own mind to people who weren’t there caused her to break down again. She started crying and couldn’t stop, alone where no one could see her she let her pain out. She was just a girl but she had so much pressure on her to take care of her family and somehow it seemed too much. Saving the world didn’t compare to the responsibility Buffy now felt to be an adult and care for her sick mother.

Washing her face and wiping away the tears Buffy regained her composure moments before the sound of her sister screaming her name grabbed her attention. She flew up the stairs to her Mom’s room where she found Dawn and her mother on the bed.

“What is it?”

“There’s something out there Buffy it’s after Mom.”

“Alright stay here.”

Buffy shut the door and was knocked down by a large slug-like demon. They struggled and went toppling down the stairs where the demon took off with a shriek much faster than it should have been able to move. Buffy struggled to get her breath back and got to her feet shakily. Her shoulder hurt and she knew she’d have some nice new bruises to go with that tumble down the stairs.

Moving through the house Buffy kept an eye out for the demon but there wasn’t even a sound. Moving back to the kitchen warily she picked up a large knife as a weapon and began the search again. At least now she had something to attack it with. Just as she was passing the basement door it opened and she jumped ready to strike. She was stopped at the sight of a familiar scarred eyebrow and bleached hair. Rolling her eyes as the vamp shut the door she thought about how much she didn’t need this right now.

“Spike.”

“Yeah. Uh listen did you hear a noise?”

Buffy did not have time for this. She had let him stay at her house before because she didn’t feel right kicking him out during the day but he was gone when she went back meaning he’d probably found his blanket. If he thought that allowing him into her house for one night meant he could come and go when he pleased he had another thing coming. She wanted to know why he was here and why he was sneaking around her basement.

“What the hell are you doing in my house?”

Spike knew she wouldn’t be eager to find him here but he was hoping she might be a little more accepting after the other night. Apparently absence didn’t always make the heart grow fonder. Hearing the commotion upstairs he thought he should go help or sneak out unnoticed, whichever was the better option. Now he found himself faced with a less than amused Slayer.

“Right then, caught me. You’re basement’s full of junk and me being in need of ah junk…”

Buffy rolled her eyes and he knew she’d bought it.

“You were stealing?”

He scoffed and quickly moved to hide the photos he was holding in the pocket of his duster.

“Well yeah. Can’t exactly work at burger barn can I?”

“Wait.”

She noticed what he was holding.

“Are those pictures of me?”

Before she had time to glare at him or he had time to come up with an answer a dark object flung itself at Spike with a shriek and he found himself pinned under one nasty looking demon. He shouted in pain and surprise and tried shaking it off but it held him down, biting and scratching at him. Buffy watched, waiting for an opening when Spike kicked out and sent the knife flying from her grasp. Buffy rolled her eyes before the demon turned its attention to her and lunged. Soon she was the one pinned down.

Gasping she flung the creature off and backed away. Spike ran to pick up the knife and tossed it her way.

“Buffy!”

She caught it and the demon knocked her down again, scrambling to get on top of her, shrieking the whole time. She struggled with it before plunging the knife in deep in its back and it screamed but remained on top of her. She struck a second time and on the third stab felt its strength slacken and it slowly sank down on top of her lifeless. Gasping for breath, she gathered her strength and rolled the disgusting thing off her.

A hand with chipped black nail polish was held out to her and she took it. Spike pulled her up and she tingled at his touch. It didn’t last long as soon the house was flooded with army men.

Riley walked in and immediately his attention went to the two blondes still holding hands. Spike knew exactly what he was looking at and feeling outnumbered let go of Buffy’s hand and stared back at the soldier who turned his attention to the Slayer.

“You okay?”

Buffy just stared at him in confusion before running upstairs to check on her Mom and Dawn.

Riley sighed as she ran past him and Spike couldn’t help adding salt to the wound.

“You just missed a real nice time.”

Riley looked down at the dead demon and exhaled sharply. He should have been here with Buffy but instead he’d been enjoying tracking down a Queller demon. He was all excited over possibly capturing an extra terrestrial which had wound up here at Revello drive where Buffy had disposed of it with Spike. Again, Spike was in Riley’s place. Not only that but it looked like the vamp might not be such a hated enemy after all if this was the second night he’d spent with Buffy in Riley’s absence.

Not wanting to risk the soldier boys taking him in Spike made a swift exit. He knew Buffy would be preoccupied with her Mom and dealing with the soldiers crowding her house and now wasn’t the time for them to talk. He’d touched her though. Held her hand for a moment and even that short contact was nice. She didn’t hate him at least, not when she let him help her.

Riley watched the vamp stalk off into the night feeling bitter and angry. He really hated hostile 17 and the reasons why just kept adding up. Buffy came back down when she was sure everything upstairs was okay and was less than pleased when she found her house filled with army guys.

“What are they still doing here?”

She directed her question at Riley but the group’s commander spoke up.

“Checking that it was the only one, that the building’s secure and getting ready to bag and tag the body.”

“Well hurry up. I want you all out of my house. My Mom is sick and we’ve had a really rough day so the sooner you all clear out the better understand?”

The commander nodded and motioned to the men to hurry preparing the body. He knew what the Slayer was capable of and even though he wasn’t happy at being told what to do he knew better than to piss her off right now. He cast a quick look in Riley’s direction and the ex-soldier couldn’t miss the contempt in the other man’s eyes. It added to his humiliation.

As soon as the last soldier left the house, Buffy slammed the door and walked toward Riley.

“What were they doing here?”

“I went with the gang to the woods when we found out about a meteor that crash landed. We found a dead guy out there and figured something had crawled out and started a killing spree. We knew you were busy with your Mom and didn’t want to worry you so they went to do research while I stayed to investigate the crime scene.”

“Uh huh. And did the gang know you were going to call in the Initiative for help too?”

Riley shifted uncomfortably under her glare before his indignation kicked in and he defended himself.

“No but I knew we couldn’t handle this alone and we couldn’t call you. I went to people I knew had the ability to help track it down and capture it. I didn’t want to worry you. I figured we’d have it taken care of and they’d be gone before you even knew about it.”

Buffy felt her anger rising.

“I’m the Slayer Riley. Weird demons arrive and start a killing spree I’m supposed to know about it. I can understand you didn’t want to worry me but information like that would be nice to know. That thing attacked my Mom. It could have killed her and you decide to go and call in the people I trust less than I do the Watcher’s Council? Since when are you still in touch with them?”

“I trust them Buffy. The organisation you knew was shut down. They’ve learned from their mistakes and now they’re helping people. They know about demons you can’t just expect them to sit back and pretend everything’s ok. You can’t be everywhere at once you know. They’re making a difference and I stayed in touch with them because I knew it was a useful contact to have.”

“Oh yeah? They were real useful tonight with their fancy gadgets weren’t they. I can’t trust them Riley. Just because they screwed up last year doesn’t mean they’ve learned from their mistakes. You said they wanted to capture it when that thing needed killing. I don’t need them as a contact. It was useful when your life was in danger from what they did to you but your fixed now and there’s no reason to stay in touch with them. I don’t like it and I don’t want them spying on me.”

Riley was getting angrier and more defensive as she continued to lash out at him.

“They’re not spying on you Buffy! They were helping!”

Buffy’s eyes narrowed and she lowered her voice dangerously.

“I don’t need or want their help. I need to take care of Mom now. You should leave.”

Riley panicked. Was she kicking him out? He moved toward her his whole demeanor changing.

“Hey Buffy I’m sorry. I should’ve told you, I just thought we could take care of it and I was worried when I saw that thing. I know how dangerous it was for you and seeing Spike here again didn’t help my mood. Let me help you. I know it must be hard with your Mom right now.”

Buffy barely heard him, still fuming that he would have brought the Initiative back to Sunnydale when something he said caught her attention. Seeing Spike here again? When had he seen Spike here? Deciding it was best not to raise that issue she backed away when he moved to put his arm around her.

“No. I need to do this myself. Mom wouldn’t like anyone else to see her like this. I’ll be fine. This is between family. You should go, get some rest. I’ll talk to you later okay?”

She backed towards the stairs again. Riley wanted to complain but knew that would only lead to a further argument. She was pushing him away again and he was going to let her. He nodded and walked to the door. He turned around as he opened it and looked at her.

“Okay Buffy. I’ll talk to you later. I’m here for you, you know that right? Anything you need, you don’t have to be alone.”

Buffy nodded.

“I know. Goodnight Riley.”

“Goodnight Buffy.”

She walked away upstairs and he left, closing the door firmly behind him. He wasn’t going home tonight. He was going to that place. The place he felt needed.

Chapter 4

Two days had passed and Buffy was exhausted. Nothing much out of the ordinary had happened but it was a full time job caring for Joyce and Buffy wasn’t sure how much longer she could do it. Finally the day of the surgery had arrived. The whole gang was at the hospital waiting as Joyce was prepped for her operation, praying everything went okay.

Riley had made it in time to see Joyce before she was carted off and Buffy didn’t know what to do now he was here. She kept her distance from him in the waiting room sitting with Dawn instead and he was reluctantly giving her space. She hadn’t seen or talked to him since the night she’d killed the Queller demon. Everything was so confused lately, she knew anything they said to each other could lead to an argument and she wasn’t ready for that yet. There were more important things happening right now.

Spike hadn’t shown up either, at least not face to face. Buffy had felt him outside her window each night. It was comforting to know he was there and his presence had made the little sleep she’d managed while watching her Mom peaceful. She was finding more comfort in her enemy than in her boyfriend. A whole can of worms had been opened since that night when she’d let Spike in and once her worries over her Mom could be eased, Buffy knew she would have to face up to these new problems. If anything she knew the two men involved wouldn’t let her dodge those issues much longer.

Checking the time again Buffy began pacing. They’d been in there so long now. Had something gone wrong? Every worst case scenario was being played out in Buffy’s head and she was wringing her hands, biting her lip and wearing a hole in the floor. Riley made the decision to approach her then seeing the worried expressions on her friends’ faces.

“Buffy…” he reached out to hold her and she jerked away.

“What’s taking so long? They’ve been in there hours now, something’s gone wrong hasn’t it?”

Riley sighed returning his hand to his side and watching as she continued to pace.

“I’m sure everything’s fine. It’s a serious operation so it’s going to take some time. They know what they’re doing and since they’ve been in there so long it means they’re able to do something about removing the tumour. If they’d been finished any earlier I’d be worried that they couldn’t do anything.”

Buffy seemed to settle at that thought.

“Yeah. You’re right, I know it’s just…I need to know what’s happening. We haven’t heard anything and…” she broke off when she recognised her Mom’s doctor approaching.

“Ms. Summers?”

Buffy nodded.

“Your mother is in recovery after the surgery. She did really well and everything went smoothly. I’m pleased to say we managed to remove the tumour completely. It will take some time and we’ll need to monitor her closely over the next few days but I expect her to make a full recovery.”

Buffy felt her entire body relax and a massive weight seemed to fall away from her. She was so relieved she could barely speak and when she did her voice was wobbly as tears of happiness threatened to pour down her face.

“Oh thank you. Thank you doctor.”

That was all she managed before she was taken over by her emotions. The doctor simply nodded, smiled and walked away. Dawn came rushing over to grab hold of Buffy who hugged her little sister tightly in shared relief. The Scoobies breathed a collective sigh of relief and came over to the two young Summer’s women, hugging them in turn.

Riley watched as Buffy was surrounded by her friends and embraced each one of them with a smile on her face. Slowly he walked over and stood in front of her. She turned to him and they looked at each other before he held out his arms. After a few seconds pause Buffy moved forward into his hug and lightly hugged him back. Aware of the others eyes on them it lasted only a minute before Buffy pulled away. She gave him a small smile before turning her attention back to Dawn.

It wasn’t what he’d been hoping for but it was closer than he’d been to her for a while now. Things were still unsettled between them and he knew it would take time and discussion before they were back to normal. He briefly caught Xander’s eye over the girls’ heads and Xander smiled reassuringly at him. He knew the others had been wondering about the couple’s distance lately and were worried about his disappearances the past few nights on patrol. He knew they’d be shocked if they found out where he’d been going but he wasn’t about to let that happen. Hopefully he could get things straightened out with Buffy and end it without anyone knowing.

***

Back at home Buffy was revelling in the knowledge that everything would be okay now her mother was safe. Dawn had been all about the celebration of the good news but Buffy had felt her strength begin to ebb as tiredness and exhaustion set in and so it had been decided that Dawn would stay with Xander and Anya while Buffy chilled out at home. Willow had offered to come stay with her but Buffy declined knowing full well that her best friend and Tara were spending pretty much every minute together and Buffy was glad to see someone’s relationship was blossoming considering the state hers was in right now.

Speaking of which Riley had said he was coming over later to talk. Buffy was hoping for some alone time to think things over but knew the longer she avoided the talk the worse it would be. He had questions, of course he did. She’d been avoiding him and that fight had been the first real argument they’d had since he’d refused to have the Government doctor operate on him. As usual it was because of the army stuff that they’d fought. It was part of who he was and despite what Buffy thought she knew he would always be in some way loyal to them. It was hard to forget years of training to think and behave a certain way. After all it had taken her long enough to realise that everything wasn’t so black and white in the demon world and that the Watcher’s Council could in no way be considered her friends.

Pushing her troubling thoughts away for the moment Buffy decided to continue with her original plan of relaxing by taking a long hot bubble bath, cuddling up in her snuggly pyjamas and curling up on the couch with a bottle of wine, snacks and the remote. She didn’t have long to enjoy it however when someone knocked on the door. Riley had a key but she guessed the way she’d been acting lately had put him off just walking in the front door. She was grateful because to be honest she liked being the one to decide if he could come in or not right now. Not that he couldn’t anyway with having a key.

Bracing herself, she got up and opened the door where she was immediately met with a bouquet of roses in her face. Stepping back she took the flowers he was practically throwing at her and moved around so she could see him. He stood there smiling sheepishly, not quite knowing what to do with his hands as he crossed them, put them behind his back and then decided to place them on his hips.

“Umm thanks. Come in Riley.”

She moved out of the way as he entered, shutting the door behind him and then left to find a vase to put the flowers in. She understood it was a peace offering but couldn’t help but feel like he was trying to buy her off.

Back in the hall Riley waited wondering how best to approach this. He didn’t want an argument so he was hoping to avoid any mention of the Government soldiers as he couldn’t help getting defensive whenever she brought them up. In turn he decided he wouldn’t mention the bleached wonder. Essentially he planned to accept her behaviour the past few days as stress over her mother and get them back to a comfortable relationship where he didn’t have to knock before coming in.

Buffy came back and wondered just how she was going to bring up the issues they so badly needed to discuss if they were to rebuild their trust in each other and get their relationship back on course. Of course one of the issues was that Buffy currently wasn’t so sure she wanted them back on course. She’d seen a side of Riley she didn’t like and as sweet and dependable as he had appeared she knew that beneath the surface was the hardened soldier who never liked hearing his motives questioned and couldn’t accept that sometimes he needed help. She’d heard all about his absences on patrol and had a sinking feeling it was because he was trying to kill demons by himself, even without the stuff the Initiative had been fuelling him with.

Deciding it was a conversation they should both sit down for, she gestured towards the living room and waited for him to nod before they both went in and sat at opposite ends of the couch, not too far away to be distant but not too close to be intimate either.

“Buffy I’m sorry. I know you’ve had a lot to deal with lately and I shouldn’t have been so pushy. I wanted to be there for you but you wanted to be strong. I get that now. You couldn’t let yourself go and you didn’t. You never even cried.”

Oh but she had. Just not in front of anyone. Well except for Spike that is.

“Oh I cried. I cried so hard sometimes I didn’t think I’d be able to stop.”

“Oh.” Riley seemed confused and a little upset at the news.

Because I never cried in front of him.

“Riley look it’s true what you said about me being under a lot of stress I’ll admit. I didn’t want to let anyone in because I needed to focus. But that’s not the only problem here.”

Here we go he thought. It looked like they would be arguing tonight after all.

“The truth is we’ve got problems. Things we’ve been trying to ignore but that aren’t going to go away because we want them to. One of those things is the Initiative.”

Riley had a frown on his face and was struggling not to voice his irritation. Really struggling.

“I know that it was a big part of who you are and that you can’t just forget them. It was your whole life for years but it’s constantly been a wedge between us. I don’t want to be in touch with them but you can’t seem to let them go.”

He swallowed down his annoyance before answering as calmly as he could.

“Buffy they aren’t the same people anymore. They’re army and they just want to keep people safe. They’re a useful resource to have and I don’t see why you can’t learn to accept that. What happened in the past is in the past. We should use them to our advantage now.”

He just didn’t get it and Buffy didn’t know how to make it any clearer for him.

“What makes you think they wouldn’t be the ones using us Riley? God knows they’ve done it before and history has a way of repeating itself. They’ll get new advancements in their technology and think that maybe if they’re more careful with the staff choices this time around they could succeed and the next thing you know there’s another demon capturing facility in place. I can’t trust them Riley. I went through a similar deal with the Watcher’s Council and I’m so much better off without them.”

Riley couldn’t speak. If he did it would lead to shouting and that wasn’t what he came here for. Clearly she meant what she said about never trusting them but he didn’t think it could compare to the Council the way she seemed to. Instead of answering he just nodded, showing that he understood.

Buffy sighed. He acknowledged what she said but it was more than clear he didn’t agree with her. Problem number one hadn’t been solved but at least it was out in the open now.

“Another thing is your determination to do everything yourself. I understand you want to be independent but you can’t hold your own against demons and vamps the way you used to and even then you couldn’t handle them by yourself.”

“You said you preferred to patrol alone. I don’t see why we can’t just split up and kill a few nasties then meet back up. I’m smart enough to develop a strategy before I attack and I don’t take on anything I can’t handle.”

“Then why have you been disappearing lately? It’s dangerous out there Riley and you haven’t shown up to a single patrol. The others told me how you never showed and that the one time you were together you told them to meet in the morning when it was safe before going back by yourself later on to kill five vamps. Five Riley! You say you don’t bite off more than you can chew but the fact is you don’t know your limits. Even when you patrolled with me you were always jumping straight into a fight regardless of what the creature was capable of.”

“I am so sick of arguing with you about this! I know what I’m doing Buffy. As difficult as it is for you to believe you aren’t the only one who can kill demons. Just because you’re chosen and I’m not is no reason to think I’m incapable of doing what I’ve been doing since before I met you!

God how more pig-headed could he be?! Buffy was getting angry now. This was the problem wasn’t it? They came here to talk about their issues but the fact was that neither one of them could back down or make allowances for the other. She watched as Riley stood up and began pacing around the room. Clearly something else was bothering him and it was only a matter of time before he let loose.

Finally throwing his hands up in the air he spun around to face her and said what he’d been hoping to avoid but knew needed to be said. As far as he could see all the problems she’d said they needed to discuss were his fault but she certainly wasn’t blameless either.

“You know it’s not just my fault we’re in this mess. You never let me in Buffy, even before your Mom, not really, but you seem to have no problem sharing things with the evil undead.”

Oh God here it was. The giant elephant in the room was finally making its presence known. Buffy was under no illusion as to who he was referring to.

“The thing with you and Angel was something I can never really get but you know what? I trusted you when you said he was different. He has a soul which somehow makes him more human even though he didn’t seem like it to me but you know what, it’s fine. I made it be fine because I trusted you and it was before we met and you were young then. Then there was Dracula and I let that go too because of the thrall thing. I figured it wasn’t your fault because he used his power on you and you did manage to overcome it because you staked him. What I really, really don’t get, though, is why you felt the need to confide in Spike! He spat the vamp’s name out like it was something vile he couldn’t bear to have in his mouth.

Buffy took a deep breath, focusing intently at the floor. She didn’t know what to say about this because she was as confused as he was. She didn’t know why she was suddenly able to share things with someone she hated instead of Riley and she wasn’t sure of her own feelings concerning the soulless vamp right now.

The day you were at the hospital I found him here in the house. I had to find out from him about where you were. Do you have any idea how it felt to have that thing tell me something that I should have found out from my girlfriend herself? Not to mention what he said about you buying him drinks the night before. Is it true? Were you with him then?”

Buffy decided to be honest. Knowing how Riley had found about her Mom explained a few things and made the situation worse. Of all the people who could have told him it had been Spike.

“Yes it’s true but I only did it to hear about the Slayer’s he’d killed. I came close to dying when that vamp staked me and I needed to find out about previous Slayers and why they lost. The Watcher’s diaries were no help and I went to the one source available who could tell me anything. The drinks…well you know Spike…he doesn’t do anything for free.”

“Well that’s for damn sure. So what you decide to share all your problems with him after he goes into detail about murdering two of your predecessors?” He snorted unbelievably.

“No, that’s not it. Look we…the night didn’t end on pleasant terms for either of us okay. I left and when I got home I found Mom packing, I’d just found out something could be seriously wrong with her. I was out on the porch crying and Spike showed up. He caught me when I was vulnerable and he’s never seen me like that…I guess it threw him. He sat with me for a while and I don’t know…I talked and he listened.”

Buffy didn’t know why she was telling him all this but she figured she was trying to understand what had happened herself.

“Oh I see, that’s just great. Not only do you share your problems with him but you cried in front of him too, something you won’t do around your friends, people who actually support you.”

Was he serious? She’d just explained how Spike had shown up out of the blue and he was mad because she’d cried in front of someone other than him?

“It’s not like I intended to break down in front of him Riley I told you he just turned up.”

“Yeah he seems to be doing that a lot lately. So what, you were having another heart to heart when the Queller demon showed up?”

“No he was stealing stuff from the basement. What exactly are you accusing me of here Riley?”

She had a decent idea but she needed to hear it coming from him.

“Seems to me like you’ve got a soft spot for vamps. At least the ones who are or were a serious threat. Angel, Dracula, and now Spike. He’s got a chip in his head Buffy and it’s the only thing stopping him from murdering all Sunnydale right now. You seem to think he’s some harmless pet.”

Buffy stood up now too, feeling defensive.

“A pet? This is Spike we’re talking about Riley. He’s harmless yes but don’t think for one second that I’m not aware of what he’s capable of. I’ve seen it first-hand remember? The fact is he’s useful now that he has no choice but to fight demons to get his kicks and the information he’s given out has been more than useful. He’s a resource.”

“And one that could turn on you at any second. Face it Buffy you just admitted to trusting Spike more than the Council or the army. All you do is defend him. Sure he gets in the way and you lose your cool but it’s nothing but empty threats really. I’m your boyfriend but you share more with that thing than me. How could you have told him about your Mom and not me? You expect him to what understand how you feel?”

“It’s different with Mom Riley…they…she…he has a soft spot for her alright.”

“Excuse me?”

“Look back when Drusilla first broke up with him he came back to Sunnydale and kidnapped Willow intending to make her do a spell to get her back. He went to my house to wait for me because he needed help getting the stuff he needed and basically him and my Mom sat down drinking hot chocolate together while he told her all about his problems with Dru. The last time my Mom saw him was when we’d had that truce so she didn’t think he was dangerous but he was. He could have killed her but he didn’t because she was nice to him. He just…likes her.”

Riley stared at her in open-mouthed disbelief. She probably shouldn’t have told him all that but she didn’t know how else to explain that Spike could understand how she felt about possibly losing her Mom.

“You mean to tell me that an evil, used to be master of Sunnydale vamp makes exceptions about who he kills and your mother is one such exception because she made him hot chocolate and listened to his sob story about his ex?”

Buffy just looked at him. He could accept it or not. She’d told the truth. He paced a bit more, stopping occasionally to open his mouth to speak before shaking his head and continuing to pace. Eventually he made his mind up and stood right in front of her, invading her personal space.

“I don’t know what’s going on with you and that vamp Buffy but I came here to discuss us. Now I’m willing to try if you are because God knows all I want is for you to be with me again and share things with me the way a couple’s supposed to. Clearly we have problems but I’m willing to work through them if you are. Now tell me Buffy, if I agree to break contact with the Government will you break contact with Spike?”

An ultimatum. They just established how much they clearly couldn’t compromise when it came to things they felt strongly about and he wanted to brush it all under the carpet by giving her an ultimatum?

“I don’t know if I can do that Riley. I don’t think we can just make this go away by pretending to ignore it. I just…I don’t think we’re compatible. We never really were. I can’t ask you to give up what you are and even if I was willing to give up a useful contact like Spike we both know he’d still be in the picture. We can’t make him go away.”

God knows I’ve tried.

Riley looked livid and Buffy stepped back a bit, nervous of what he might do. He was shaking, fists balled up at his sides before he controlled himself enough to speak. When he did his voice was cold and hard.

“I see. You want to end it then huh? Alright fine. We’re done. But I want you to know something Buffy. I will never understand how you can accept demons it’s your duty to fight and I don’t know what kind of a Slayer it makes you but you can be sure that I won’t stop hunting them, any of them, and since it’s where you think I belong I think I’ll go join my army buddies and keep doing my job. You can guarantee if I come across a monster I’ll kill it, helpless or not.”

Was he threatening Spike? Buffy was really unnerved and pissed off by his behaviour. He’d better not do something stupid and attack Spike or…hang on why did she feel such an urge to protect Spike? Of course she didn’t want Riley taking his anger out on someone who was helpless to defend themselves but her feelings were so protective, almost possessive.

“Just go Riley. Leave your key and get out, and don’t do anything stupid or I’ll really have to hurt you.”

He scowled at her then smirked in a real know-it-all-kind of way, unlike Spike’s smirk it didn’t aggravate her in that he-looks-damn-sexy-when-he-does-that evil nuisance kind of way. It was sinister and ugly and she wanted to punch it right off his face.

Turning before she could make good on that thought he dropped his key on the little table by the door before walking out, slamming it closed behind him.

Buffy breathed a sigh of relief. She realised no matter how things went tonight there was no way she could have accepted him back into her life. He wasn’t the person she thought he was and not the person she needed. She hoped he’d just go find his soldier friends and stay the hell away from her and Sunnydale for a long time. In fact she’d be happy to never see him again after the way he’d tried threatening her.

Moving back to the couch she sat down and turned the t.v. back on. She couldn’t really concentrate on it though and she gave up deciding to just go to bed. She’d left her window open and just as she was crawling under the covers she felt a familiar tingle run down her spine. Snuggling up under the duvet Buffy figured all she had to do now was figure out her feelings towards the undead Brit who’d taken to keeping watch outside her window and her worries would settle back to what was normal for her.

Sure. You just keep telling yourself that Buffy.

Giving up she turned on her side and drifted into sleep, ever aware of the vamp tingles telling her she wasn’t alone.  

Chapter 5

A whole week and a half had passed since he’d seen Captain Cardboard anywhere near the Summers’ residence. Hell, he hadn’t seen him or sensed him anywhere in Sunnydale. It looked like the git was gone for good. Yup he was out of the picture and what did Spike do? He kept to a bloody irritatin’ routine of hanging round his crypt all day, stalkin’ the Slayer on patrol and finishin’ off the night under her bedroom window while she slept. Alone.

Spike trailed his thumb around the rim of his glass full of cold pig’s blood mixed with a shot of bourbon, not paying attention to the television while he contemplated his current position in the life of one Buffy Summers, or rather his lack thereof. A whole soddin’ week and a half and nothing had changed. No wait, plenty had changed, the most notable being the blessed absence of Finn and the less than pleasant role Spike had slipped into as watcher from afar.

He was back to keeping his distance while observing the Slayer. Something he hadn’t done since he first came to Sunny D with the intention of killing her. It had been a long while since he’d given any of the Scoobies a breather from his persistent evil presence and it made absolutely no sense now that nothing was standing in his way. No more soldier boy meant no more interruptions from his banter with the Slayer on patrol. No Harmony was also a welcome improvement that allowed him to relax if Buffy were to barrel into his crypt like she used to.

The perky blonde vamp had whined incessantly about his obsession with the girl he was doomed to never have and she was constantly making not so subtle suggestions that they leave town for somewhere more her style. Thankfully she didn’t mention sodding France again although he bet that’s what she’d had in mind, clearly having learned something from the time he’d staked her. Her constant complaints that he didn’t want to spend any time with her and several desperate attempts to seduce him had finally grated on his last nerve until he grabbed her by the throat and tossed her out the door, quickly followed by her stuff and ignoring the outraged cries and pleas, slammed the crypt door closed daring her to enter again.

So he was a free man. And Buffy was without an unnecessary egotistical bodyguard getting in his way. So what the bloody hell was stopping him from getting her alone and talkin’ to her?

Spike sighed and took a large gulp of his drink before flinging his head back against the headrest of his easy-chair staring at the ceiling.

In a word he was scared. After the kiss, while she hadn’t completely panicked or gone psycho on him which was an unexpectedly pleasant turn of events, he wasn’t so sure what her reaction would be to him now she’d had time to think. After she’d caught him in the basement stealing photos of her she’d acted normal to him and then was even friendly, accepting his offer of help. Course then all hell broke loose when the army invaded and he’d had to get the hell outta there. He’d given her time to deal with her Mum and was delighted to know Joyce was better but he continued to stay away, giving her space to work things out in her life and he’d taken an interest in Finn’s disappearance, deciding to keep an eye on the situation.

Staying away from her and keeping his distance was proving rather difficult as the days wore on and he knew he couldn’t hold out much longer. He had to talk to her soon. Lord knows how she would react when he brought up the kiss but he knew now, whatever she felt then, regardless of what she was dealing with, she’d felt something, something for him. For a moment she’d wanted him and he was going to bloody well call her on it.

Spike finished off his drink and made his decision. Tonight. He’d talk to her on patrol tonight and finally get it out in the open.

***


Buffy was dealing with some seriously conflicting emotions the past week. She hadn’t seen any sign of Riley which hurt but was a relief. After his behaviour that night she’d decided she really didn’t know him that well at all, and he wasn’t the only one.

There had been absolutely no sign of Spike lately either although she felt his presence lurking in the area. She’d gotten a lot of practice with her Slayer senses helping her to identify certain vamps and their strength levels and had discovered that Spike had a very easy signal to trace. She guessed she’d spent so much time around him that identifying him had become almost second nature to her. Which to be honest weirded her out.

Angel’s vamp vibe hadn’t been as clear as Spike’s even though she’d spent a great deal of time with him. Then again she wasn’t as well practiced back then and he’d been all Mr. Mysterious keeping his distance. Not like Spike.

Damn it I’m doing it again. I have got to stop comparing those two. They’re completely different!

Buffy couldn’t help herself noting the differences and similarities between the two vamps she hadn’t staked and it was getting on her nerves. There was absolutely no reason to compare them at all.

Especially not the differences in their kissing techniques.

Buffy’s eyes went wide and she shook her head madly as she tried to remove the images flashing in her head of soft, luscious lips and silky tounge, black leather and husky British voice, not to mention a solid and well defined physique pressed against her.

No! No more kissing Spike thoughts. Those thoughts bad, bad Buffy!

Clearing her head of the memories from the night Spike had kissed her and pushing all thoughts of the bleached wonder away Buffy took deep breaths and continued making her way to the magic shop. The gang had decided to meet up to discuss their situation with Glory. Willow had been working on some new spell or something they were hoping would give them a fighting chance.

The familiar tinkle of the bell above the entrance to the magic shop announced her arrival to the gang. Anya was too busy counting her money to bother looking up and Giles was surprise, surprise, reading. Willow and Tara were huddled in a corner discussing ingredients for the spell but looked up to give Buffy a quick wave before turning back to the shelves. Xander looked up from their usual spot at the table where he was pretending to research and gave her a big grin.

“Hey Buff, how’s it going?”

Buffy shrugged and walked over to lean against the counter where Anya continued to ignore her, staring instead at all the lovely green money in her hands.

“It’s going. Been pretty quiet lately. Any word on Glory? And before you ask, yes Mom is fine. She’s been itching to get back to work, all the pampering is getting to her.”

“Ah yes, understandable really. There’s nothing worse than having your routine taken away from you. It drives one mad sometimes,” Giles put down the book and turned to Buffy as he spoke.

Surprised he’d been paying attention with his nose buried in the ancient pages of one of his assortment of Demonology books Buffy raised an eyebrow at him.

“I guess you’d know what that’s like with all the recovery time you’ve had to do after our epic battles. Heck we’ve all been there.”

“Yeah well personally I find all the recuperation time very relaxing. There’s nothing better than sitting at home with your feet up.” Xander added.

“Except all the amazing orgasms we get to have while we’re…recuperating,” Anya added cheerfully.

“Anya!” Xander yelped.

“Why don’t you go back to counting your money, hmm Anya?” Giles suggested, rubbing his glasses vigorously.

Anya smiled and did just that, ignoring the look of horror on Xander’s face. Buffy really thought he should get used to those kinds of outbursts.

“Getting back to my original question,” Buffy began, “what’s the word on Glory?”

Recovering from his mild shock, Xander snapped the book he’d barely been skimming through shut.

“I got nada, zip and zilch here Buff. No word on this Glory chick.”

“Alas I have to agree with Xander. I can’t find any additional information to what we already know unfortunately,” Giles added, placing his glasses back in their proper place.

“Not what I wanted to hear. Willow? Anything?” Buffy turned to the two wiccans hopefully.

Willow gave her best friend a half-smile before answering.

“Well in theory it should work. It’s gonna take me another day or two to get everything I need for the spell so we won’t know how it goes until we try it out. It’s looking promising though,” she added with a larger reassuring grin. Buffy resigned herself to more waiting around and stretched her muscles. As interested in hunting down weaknesses to her new enemy as she was, research was not her thing and she needed to work out some major tension. Since that vamp had staked her she’d avoided going on the hunt late at night and patrolling had been kept to a minimum while she tended to her Mom. It was a much better idea for her to get back into Slayer mode and do some training.

“Alright, well you guys keep working on it. I’m gonna go hit stuff for a while.”

She made her way to the training room and was busy stretching when she noticed Giles had followed her in.

“Something up or are you gonna join in?”

Giles gave her a small smile before walking over to the bench and taking a seat.

“I was hoping I could have a word with you?”

“Well this sounds ominous. What is it?”

He motioned for her to join him on the bench and Buffy felt a slight panic as she sat beside him.

This can’t be good.

“Buffy, we have rather limited resources here and none of them are helping our situation with Glory. Perhaps it’s time we turned elsewhere for information?”

Buffy studied him. Oh she hoped he wasn’t suggesting what she thought he was. His mention of their resources reminded her of Riley’s argument and her mood dropped considerably.

“What resource were you thinking of?”

Giles sighed wearily. He knew this was going to take some convincing.

“I thought it might be beneficial for me to take a trip to England and speak to the Council. I know quite well what you think of them and believe me the thought of conversing with Travers is not in any way appealing to me either. However, I do believe that the fate of the world is more important than our mutual distaste of them and vice versa. Their information could be vital to turning the tables on Glory and after much consideration this seems like our only option.”

“Giles, you’re right.”

He looked up in surprise but Buffy cut him off before he could open his mouth.

“I don’t trust them and I never will. Isn’t there any other way? Besides I don’t like the thought of you leaving. It’s dangerous here with Glory after Dawn and I need you to help me.”

“Trust me Buffy I’ve observed our situation from every angle and I believe this is the right decision. I’m of no real use to you here. It’s far better I try to make an arrangement with the Council. I know why you’re anxious but we know what they’re like and we can be prepared for any unreasonable demands they might make.”

Buffy crossed her arms and huffed before standing up and pacing around the training room.

“Oh they’ll make demands alright. They want to get control of the Slayer and you’re kidding yourself if you think they won’t try. How can we be ready for them? You said it yourself, they have better resources than we ever will.”

“As I said Buffy, the fate of the world comes first. Even they aren’t blind enough not to see that. We can handle it Buffy. You’re all they’ve got, remember?”

Buffy stopped pacing and stared at the floor while she mulled things over. After what seemed like an eternity she looked back at Giles waiting expectantly for her answer.

“Fine. I’m not happy about it but if you insist that it’s our best option…I’ll just have to go with it.”

Giles smiled and rose up off the bench and patted her on the shoulder.

“You’ve made the right decision Buffy I promise.”

“Yeah, yeah. So when do you leave?”

Giles put his hands in his pockets and suddenly took great interest in the floor.

“I was thinking first thing tomorrow, actually.”

Buffy frowned.

“That soon?”

“Yes, the sooner the better don’t you think?”

“I guess.”

Buffy briefly wondered if he’d made arrangements before hearing her answer. Whether he’d planned on going with or without her consent. She decided not to ask as the last thing she needed was another argument right now and he had convinced her after all.

Giles nodded his head and went back to the shop to check on the others, leaving Buffy with yet more stuff to think about. Her head was going to explode if any more worrying problems occurred.

Great. Now she really needed to hit something.

***


Buffy grumbled quietly to herself as she picked her way through the Graveyard, twirling her stake absentmindedly. She hadn’t felt any vamps in hours and that included the special signature of the irritating thorn in her side.

Normally she would have sensed him as soon as she headed out on patrol. Tonight however, everything was pretty much…well…dead. Which was too bad because she really needed a fight. The training earlier hadn’t come close to getting rid of her frustration and she’d been hoping for something to be on the prowl. Preferably something large with a tough hide so she could vent before killing it.

She was determined to avoid Restfield Cemetary, home of her currently absent stalker. The gang had wondered if perhaps Spike had heard anything in the demon world lately that could help them. They were aware of his sudden disappearance and Xander had suggested he might have taken the hint at last that he wasn’t wanted and taken off.

Buffy told them it was unlikely as Spike seemed to have taken up a permanent residence in her town since acquiring the chip and he enjoyed annoying her far too much to leave. She decided not to tell them how easily she could sense him as it would no doubt weird them out more than her. She’d refused the suggestion to go see him and find out if he knew anything, adamant that demons wouldn’t tell him anything since he started fighting them and that she had no desire to go see him.

Which wasn’t entirely true. She was beginning to worry about his odd behaviour and wondered if maybe he was plotting something as he appeared to have reverted back to his old habits of observing her, just like he had when he’d first arrived. She was also expecting him to question her about that kiss, which she was fully prepared to explain herself for even if she didn’t quite understand it herself.

Kicking a gravestone irratibly Buffy then sat down on it, studying her stake intently. Tonight was a bust in every sense of the word and a missing Spike, she hated to admit, was souring her mood. She’d gotten used to the familiarity of his presence and it was sorely missed, especially considering everything she had to deal with at the moment.

Getting up, she was just tucking her stake behind her back when a noise grabbed her attention. She whirled to see a large greenish demon seemingly appear out of nowhere behind her and had just processed this fact when she was sent flying through the air and straight into a tree.

She hit the ground with a thud and momentarily had the wind knocked out of her.

Note to self, pay more attention on patrol. This is no place for mulling things over. Especially really distracting things.

She managed to raise herself off the ground and get into a defensive stance as the demon came flying at her. It was a good seven feet tall and her only weapon was the wooden stake. Wonderful. Then again this was exactly what she’d been hoping for right? Something that could give her a real fight.

“Okay big guy. Kudos on getting the jump on me but you are so going down.”

The demon snarled and aimed another swing at her head with its arm which she dodged, ducking and rolling to come up behind it where she aimed a solid kick at its back. The force knocked her back a bit but she was pleased to see it had caused the demon to stumble slightly as well.

Well at least I know I can do some damage.

She executed a perfect backflip when the demon spun and lunged at her, neatly catching its jaw with her feet. The demon reeled back and roared angrily.

Buffy quickly went on the offensive while it was caught off guard, aiming a flurry of kicks and punches at it, pushing it back against a mausoleum.

After a powerful kick to its mid-section which made it bend over in pain, she jumped off of a nearby gravestone and landed on top of it, her legs straddling its neck.

Sensing the danger the demon flew upright attempting to grab at her but she was prepared.

Swiftly she locked her legs around its neck and as it charged around trying to throw her off, put all her Slayer strength into flipping backwards sending the demon soaring over her, sharply twisting her legs until she heard a satisfying crack and letting it go.

It landed loudly in the dirt, completely still.

Buffy stood over the body, brushing herself off and giving it one swift kick to make sure it was most definitely dead.

After several seconds she noticed with satisfaction that the hulking mass of demon flesh and bones were dissolving away. She loved it when they did that.

“Nothing like a self-cleaning demon. I was not about to clear up that mess by myself.”

Easing out her muscles, she relaxed in the feeling of a good workout before she noticed her Slayer sense going haywire.

“’Lo Summers. Long time no see.”

She whirled around at the sound of his voice and yep, there he was, sitting comfortably atop a mausoleum, looking down at her with that trademark smirk of his. No doubt highly pleased with himself for catching her off guard.

First the demon jumps me and now Spike gets the drop on me. What is wrong with me tonight?

Admittedly she’d been too caught up in the fight to notice but that shouldn’t have happened. She should be aware of anything sneaking up on her and hadn’t she just prided herself on how easily she could sense Spike?

She scowled at him, miffed at him for the way he’d disappeared for so long and then shown up out of the blue grinning at her and miffed at herself for the happy feeling at seeing he was okay and had finally shown himself again.

“That was some fight luv. A little off your game not knowing I was here though.”

“What are you doing here? You keep your distance for over a week and then just show up like you’d never been gone?”

Spike hopped off his perch and stalked towards her. She stubbornly resisted the urge to back away as he got so close he was only inches away from her.

She looked up into his impossibly blue eyes as they sparkled down at her, swallowing back her nerves at his close proximity and held her frown.

Spike stared at her a minute, inhaling her scent, so sweet, just like he remembered. He lifted his right hand, trailing it down her long golden hair as she continued to stare up at him.

“What’s the matter luv? Worried about me were you?”

Honestly? Yes she had been, Riley’s threats wringing in her ears when he didn’t turn up. But there was no way in hell she was gonna let him know that.

“No. I thought maybe you were up to something. Plotting something evil again.”

She suddenly became aware of his hand running through her hair and slapped it away, stepping back to give herself some breathing room.

Spike smirked when she moved away. He knew he was getting to her. She had yet to threaten him with a staking so he was making progress. He needed to bring up that kiss but asking her straight out would result in rapid excuses she probably had all planned out and memorised over the last week. He needed to catch her off guard.

“No need to worry pet, still got the chip, an’ you know how unpopular I’ve become in the demon world lately. If I’d been plottin’ against you I would’ve done it long ago, yeah? Say back when I was respected by those lowlifes.”

Buffy folded her arms and rolled her eyes.

“So then what did keep you away? Was it something I did? I want to know so I can keep doing it.”

He scowled briefly before circling her. She remained rooted to the ground, tracking his movements with her senses until he was back in front of her again.

They stared each other down and his behaviour was beginning to get to her, putting her nerves on edge. She felt a slight thrill at his dangerous demeanour and pushed the feeling away quickly. Spike was not going to give her thrills. Not now he was harmless.

She fidgeted slightly about to ask what he thought he was doing when he shrugged his shoulders and slipped back into casual mode.

“Oh nothing really. Just thought I’d give you space what with Joyce an’ all. Plus there hasn’t been much action from the nasties lately so you din’t need any help.”

He searched his pockets for his cigarettes and lighter and proceeded to light one up. He continued to speak as he puffed away.

“Checked out a few demon bars, worked on the crypt…”

Buffy cut him off.

“Wait, working on the crypt?”

“Yeah. Fixin’ my place up so it’s more accommodatin’, y’know? I’m not some two-bit minion livin’ in squalor Slayer. Got taste y’know.”

Buffy snorted.

“Could have fooled me.”

He ignored her except for a quick un-amused glance and carried on.

“As I was saying, fixin’ up the crypt, watchin’ the telly and oh yeah…”

Flicking his cigarette to the ground suddenly he moved forward into her personal space again so fast Buffy barely had time to blink.

“…wonderin’ all about that kiss in your kitchen the other night and what exactly it meant?”

Crap!

Buffy stuttered and stumbled, backing away as fast as she could to generate some space between them but he kept moving forward purposefully. She didn’t think to push him away. She couldn’t think. His sudden movements had thrown her until her only thought was to flee. Back away from him.

He had no intention of letting her get away and kept pressing forward until her back hit something cold and solid. He’d managed to pin her against the mausoleum she’d backed the demon into.

Quickly he pressed both hands either side of her head against the solid wall, his arms trapping her. Her brain was in meltdown with his unexpected behaviour and when she tried to speak all that came out of her mouth was a hoarse squeak.

He moved in closer so his face was so close to hers they were almost touching.

“Well?”

Buffy’s mind spun wildly. Well? Well what? Oh! The kiss…think Buffy think…crap.

“Um…uh..well…i.i.it was just…I was upset and…you were being all nice and…I was vulnerable…”

“Rot. You wanted that kiss, Buffy. You wanted me. Vampire, remember? Hard to hide it.”

Buffy gaped at him.

What? What does he? Oh. Oh eww, that’s so gross.

“You wanted it Buffy.”

“No Spike. I…I just…”

“You wanted me.”

Okay now he was pissing her off.

“No. I…mmph.”

Buffy found her ability to speak impaired by Spike’s mouth on hers, kissing her demandingly and God help her after she got over her initial surprise she was kissing him back.

Chapter 6

She was completely lost in sensation. The feel of his lips moving against hers and his body pressing her into the wall behind her. He slid his tongue along her barely parted lips and she opened her mouth feeling her body hum as she met his searching tongue with her own. They explored each other’s mouths as Buffy raised her arms and trailed her hands up his firm torso, sliding them up to his shoulders and slipping them underneath his duster, wanting to feel him.

If he’d been alive Spike was sure his heart would have stopped at the way she was responding to him. The way she was pulling him closer, gripping his shoulders and the way her silky tongue met his own. God the noises she was making, little whimpers and moans. Her hand came up to caress the short hairs at the back of his neck and hold him to her and he groaned. Now he knew for sure. She wanted him, she wasn’t just clinging to him for comfort or because she was vulnerable. She desired him even if she insisted on denying it.

Slowly he placed his hands on her hips and caressed the soft skin just under the hem of her shirt with his thumbs. She shivered slightly and blessed him with another little whimper. He tightened his grip, pulling her hips against his while pressing her against the wall, groaning again when he felt her warm body pressed against the ever growing bulge in his pants.

Her breath caught in her throat when she felt his very evident erection pressing into her. His kiss grew more urgent and she felt her legs growing weak and she clung to him for support, letting the wonderful sensations he was causing wash over her. When he sensed her need for air he tilted his head and kissed along her jaw while she gasped for breath. Her gasps turned to pants as he made his way down to her throat and then along her neck, placing open-mouthed kisses along her heated flesh.

Her Slayer sense was sent into over-drive at having him so close to her pulse only adding to the thrill she was feeling. She moaned when he slid his tongue back up her neck and nipped at a spot just under and behind her ear with his blunt teeth. He continued to nip gently at her flesh while she pushed his duster down to his elbows where she could grip his arms and feel the muscles under his skin flexing. Wow did he have arms. Normally they were covered with the duster but she’d felt the strength there and wasn’t disappointed.

She needed to kiss him again and caught his head with her hands pulling him back to her mouth urgently. He happily complied and they resumed their exploration of each other’s mouths.

His hands began to wander under her shirt, up along her sides sending little electric jolts running through her. He brushed against her breasts and with a gasp she ground her hips against him. His left hand darted down to her thigh and he raised her leg slightly, getting a better angle and squeezing it as he thrust against her. They both moaned at the feeling and Buffy was just regretting her decision to wear pants instead of a skirt tonight when a scream broke through the air and tore through her lusty haze.

She pulled away from Spike and noticed his eyes, darkened with desire, focused on hers while she tried to regain her breath and the ability to stand on her own two feet. The intensity of his look had her leaning toward him again when a second scream, louder and closer this time broke the spell and she remembered where she was.

He barely caught her sad, wistful expression before she pushed him away and ran off.

Duty calls he thought. He was still reeling from the experience and while it occurred to him that she might need help, his body appeared to be struggling to move, probably because of the lack of blood flowing in his brain’s direction at the minute. He realised he was panting unnecessarily, old habits dying hard.

Meanwhile Buffy was running swiftly through the cemetery, her only thought being the unknown person in trouble. Finally they came into view, a young woman, her jacket torn and mud staining her jeans fleeing from a large male vamp who was closing the distance rapidly.

The woman stumbled and fell and just as the vamp was about to pounce, Buffy hurled herself at him, sending them both flying.

He was pinned to the ground in seconds and quick as a flash the Slayer pulled out her stake and he was nothing but dust.

Standing up and brushing the remaining traces of vamp dirt off her clothes she was about to check on the woman and give her the “you-know-you-really-shouldn’t-be–walking-near-cemetaries-at-night” lecture but when she turned around she just managed to catch sight of the girl’s back as she ran off.

“Gee, let’s hope she doesn’t get into any more trouble on the way home, although from the way she’s running I doubt even I could catch her,” Buffy shrugged and put her stake away.

“Hey Buff, done with patrol already?”

Buffy turned to see Xander and Anya standing behind her. She had a brief moment of panic thinking maybe they saw her with Spike and immediately dismissed the idea from the calm looks on their faces.

“Hey guys. Yep all done, at least I think so from the lack of vamps around here now.”

“Well at least you got some action tonight right?”

Buffy’s eyes went wide as she let out a startled, “Huh…wh…what?”

Xander looked puzzled and Anya raised her eyebrows.

“Well I’m assuming that woman was running from something other than you and you look like someone who worked off a lot of her frustration recently. At least you certainly don’t seem as…cranky as you did earlier.”

Comprehension dawned and Buffy breathed a sigh of relief.

“Oh! Right, yeah, um vamp. She was running from a vamp but I took my crankiness out on a big, icky demon. It dissolved so no clean up required.”

“Ah and no demon disposal makes for one happy Buffster.”

“You betcha! So, what are you guys doing out here? Or do you always take romantic strolls through the graveyard?”

“God no. I’d much rather be at home with my pretty worldly possessions. Xander thought we might catch you on patrol, see if you needed any help.”

“Right. No help required since there really hasn’t been much going on lately, which by the way, starting to bug me since I haven’t heard from Glory lately either and as much as not running into her is a good thing I’m worried she’s up to something.”

“Hey maybe she gave up and lost interest in this key thingy she’s after,” Xander grinned.

Buffy quirked an eyebrow at him and he shrugged.

“Okay so probably not but seen as the world isn’t ending I’m guessing she hasn’t found it yet either and if she is planning something she might be in for a major surprise.”

Buffy perked up at that and crossed her arms.

“Yeah, how’s that?”

“Well Willow got those few missing ingredients together faster than she thought. Come tomorrow her and Tara should be all set to test this new spell they’ve been itching to try out.”

Anya frowned.

“Great, I just don’t see why they have to test it out in the shop.”

“Hey anything we can use to fight Glory would really be welcome right now,” Buffy put in.

“Of course. It’s just that with Giles gone I finally get to be in charge of the shop and you know Willow and magic. I just don’t want my first day running the place by myself to include going hocus pocus abraKABOOM!”

Xander wrapped his arm around Anya and gave her a reassuring squeeze.

“It’s okay honey, I’m sure the shop will be fine. Besides it’s not like the place hasn’t been trashed often enough before and you’re dating a carpenter. Cheap furniture replacement at your service.”

Anya brightened at that.

“Well that’s true, but they still better not blow anything up, or damage the money. I will not have my money harmed Xander.”

“Trust me I know.”

Buffy grinned at the exchange. They really went well together even if Anya was a little strange, but then she’d have to be to put up with Xander and fit into the gang like she had.

A tingle ran up her spine and Buffy tensed. Spike was close. Would he say something, tell Xander and Anya what they might have caught her doing if they’d come along a few minutes earlier. Something she definitely should not have been doing here, and certainly not with him.

The woman in trouble and the arrival of her friends had once again returned Buffy to the real world. The world where she and Spike hated each other. They were enemies. So why the hell had she been smooching with him earlier? She remembered how she had wanted it to go much further than it had and was overcome with shame. He was a soulless monster. How could she have…

“You alright Buff?”

She started at the sound of Xander’s voice.

“I’m fine, peachy even.”

Xander frowned but nodded.

“So, you heading home now or doing another sweep?”

Buffy could still feel Spike watching them. Apparently he wasn’t going to join them, preferring to stay away from Xander. She knew he was waiting for her to be alone and the thought made up her mind for her.

“I don’t think I’ll be seeing any more action tonight. I should go home and see Mom and Dawn. Mom really doesn’t need to be worrying about me staying out late.”

She couldn’t face him. Being near him was risky. She kept letting her defences down and he kept surprising her. Things were muddled right now. Riley had been gone a little more than a week and she hadn’t even cried over him, not really. Macking on Spike was clearly a sign of how messed up her thoughts were if her judgement was that bad. She needed to work this out and just keep her distance. Of course that was easier said than done knowing him.

“Alright, let’s go, Anya’s not the only one who’ll be glad to get out of here.”

Buffy followed her friends as they made their way home, Spike’s eyes burning a hole in her back the entire way out of the cemetary.

He was hoping she would stick around so they could at least talk. Should’ve bloody known better. Soon as she saw her friends she’d remembered she was supposed to hate him, that he was revolting and she’d run scared from what they’d done.

He narrowed his eyes and stomped off towards the bad part of town. He was sorely in need of a drink and Willy’s was as good a place as any. If she thought for one minute he was jus’ gonna forget this she had a bloody ‘nother thing coming.

***

Buffy had had a restless night. The kind where she got zero sleep and was now feeling irritable and impatient and had a severe headache to go along with her charming new mood. She couldn’t quite decide if the lack of sleep was because she hadn’t felt Spike around since the graveyard or because of the very vivid dream she’d had involving him that had shocked her awake and left her aching and damp in places he definitely should not be affecting. She suspected it was probably both.

After a very cold shower, she dressed and tried to make herself appear somewhat normal before heading downstairs for breakfast. Joyce was in the kitchen, finishing off a cup of coffee and reading the paper and looked up in surprise at her eldest daughter.

“You’re certainly up early this morning.”

“Or late depending on how you look at it,” Buffy grumbled.

“Well you came home pretty early from patrol so I’m guessing you didn’t sleep very well. Any particular reason?”

Buffy rooted through the cupboards while she decided what to eat for breakfast.

“Not really. I just have a whole lot on my plate with Glory being suspiciously quiet and this new spell Willow and Tara want to try that could literally explode in our faces and Giles going away to talk to people I hate and ask them for help, not to mention dealing with the fact I was dating a complete asshole for a year and stupid vamps that won’t leave you alone and then vanish and come back to be twice the nuisances they were…”

Joyce blinked rapidly while her daughter ranted and paced about the kitchen, opening and closing doors before picking out a box of cereal from the first cupboard she looked in and plopping down at the kitchen island to eat, eventually holding up a hand to halt the tirade.

“Okay so stupid question. Buffy are you alright. Maybe you should stay home and rest. You sound like you need it.”

“Thanks Mom but if I couldn’t get any rest last night hanging out here all day isn’t going to solve that problem and I really need to be there when Willow tests this spell later, plus the new semester is starting and I need to go check out my classes.”

“Right, of course. You missed so much school already taking care of me.”

“Hey, don’t worry about it. You’re more important and you needed me, besides, I told you I’ll still be okay and I can make up my grades as long as I’m really good and work hard this semester.”

“I know but I can’t help feeling guilty that you missed so much college because of me.”

“You are crazy you realize that?”

Joyce smiled affectionately at her daughter.

“I think I’m allowed to be crazy with a hole in my head and being housebound for so long. The sooner I can go back to work the sooner I’ll become sane.”

“Well you still have a couple weeks left before then so you’ll just have to find something else to keep you someway normal.”

“Don’t remind me. I miss the gallery. Still I can understand why with all the napping I need to do.”

“That’s okay sleeping beauty, the Gallery will still be there when you’re ready. Ugh, but I should really make a move and head over to campus.”

“Alright honey, take care and I hope your day gets better.”

“Thanks Mom, love you, and say bye to Dawn for me.”

Buffy kissed her mother goodbye and left to face the world feeling slightly better but with no expectations of having a good day.

***

Surprisingly things hadn’t gone as badly as she had suspected. While some classes sounded tough and she had that one teacher that spit when he talked things were looking up and now she and Tara were headed to the Magic Box to meet Willow and try out the new spell.

Upon entering the shop, however, it appeared her first assumption of how her day would go was correct. Anya and Willow were in the middle of a heated argument behind the counter completely oblivious to the magic swirling around a crystal behind them.

“Willow!” Tara warned.

The redhead spun round but it was too late. There was a loud crack and a puff of purple smoke and the shop had a new occupant. A very large troll now stood in the middle of the shop holding an equally large hammer and he did not look pleased. With a loud roar the troll smashed the glass counter with his hammer and headed for the exit, smashing anything within range. Buffy dropped her bag and headed straight for the thing while Tara ducked out of the way and moved towards Willow who was rooted to the spot beside Anya.

Buffy didn’t even get a single hit on the troll before he knocked her clean across the room with his hammer and barrelled out through the door.

The sight of her smashing the far wall and leaving a nice, Buffy-shaped dent in it, roused Willow and Anya from their stunned silence and they raced towards her.

“Buffy!”

“My God are you okay?”

Buffy heaved herself off the floor. Perfect. Now her headache was like a jackhammer in her head and she had new aches and pains all over her body.

“I’m fantastic. What happened?”

Willow and Anya shared a meaningful look before Willow sighed and answered.

“I was getting everything ready for the spell and was just checking the translation when Anya started correcting me. Long story short it turned into this big row and I guess we kinda sorta did a twisted version of the spell and released a trollgod from one of the magical crystal thingies in the shop.”

“Wonderful. I knew this day was going to be hell.”

“Well hey it’s not like we knew there was a troll trapped in one of those crystals, and everything would have been just fine if Anya hadn’t kept interrupting me.”

“Hey! Don’t blame this on me missy, I’m just trying to look after my shop and I thought you might want to at least get your translation right.”

“My translation was perfect thank you, just because you used to be a demon with all the demon languages and the incredibly long life span…”

“Guys…” Buffy tried to intervene desperately.

“It was far from perfect and now look, just look at this place! It’s trashed! Do you realise how much it’s going to cost to repair this place? This is my first day completely in charge!”

“Guys…” Buffy tried again.

“You’re dating a carpenter! And it’s not like it hasn’t been trashed before! Besides it’s so not my fault!”

“GUYS!”

Three stunned faces turned to look at her. Tara smiled in understanding and sympathy and Willow and Anya had the grace to look ashamed of themselves. Buffy rubbed her temples.

“I changed my mind, it doesn’t matter how that thing got here let’s just figure out how to get rid of it. Any way we could trap it back in that crystal thing again?”

Tara shook her head.

“Uh uh. The crystal got destroyed when it was released. There’s no way we’re trapping it again. We might be able to send it to another dimension though, open up a portal maybe?”

She turned to Willow who nodded excitedly.

“Yeah that could work. I’ll grab what we need and we can track that thing down. We’ll have to be in range for the spell to work.”

“Great. Hurry up. Who knows what damage that thing is causing the longer it’s out there. I’m just guessing it’s leaving a big enough trail to make tracking it a piece of cake.”

The witches set about gathering their things while Buffy checked to see how much damage she’d sustained. Anya, meanwhile, assessed the damage to the shop.

***

Spike scowled dangerously at yet another person staring at him in the Bronze. They soon scarpered off leaving him alone at his table to gingerly sip at his beer around his torn lip. His foul mood had led him into a fight at Willy’s where he was already pretty unpopular and while he’d held his own for a long time, being outnumbered by demons larger and stronger than him found him tossed out the back door looking worse for wear.

It was his current appearance that had so many people staring at him warily now. Besides the injured lip he also sported a nasty black eye, his right, and bruised jaw. His left ear had dried in blood around it and those were only the injuries they could see. After being kicked out of the demon bar he’d purchased a large quantity of alcohol from the liquor store but after several bottles decided he’d had enough wallowing in his own misery and decided to share in the misery of others at the Bronze.

All the drinking had done little to erase the memories of having Buffy pressed against him and if anything had made him dwell on them more. Oh yeah, and let’s not forget her rejection of him afterwards when her friends showed up and she fled without a word to him.

He took another gulp of his beer to find it empty. He looked around for a waitress but they were keeping their distance from him and grumbling to himself, he eased out of his chair and limped towards the bar.

He was almost there when someone bumped into him roughly and he swore, wheeling around to face the idiot.

“Hey watch it mate!”

He was unsure if it was the alcohol at first but when the figure remained the same after a while Spike realised that he was in fact looking up at a troll. The troll growled at him warningly and he realised he may have just gotten himself into another fight with a much more dangerous creature in a human bar.

“Oh, Bloody hell!”

***

“Man this thing is leaving a serious mess behind it,” Buffy commented.

“At least it’s easy to follow,” Tara added.

They had just driven past yet another chaos strewn street. Lampposts and trash cans were scattered about and car alarms blared while people ran in the opposite direction. Anya had insisted she was perfectly capable of driving them so they could catch the trollgod faster but as it turned out she really couldn’t drive. She either flew around so fast they were rolling around in their seats every time she turned and clinging on for dear life or jerked on the brakes sending them flying towards the windshield only to be prevented from smashing their heads through the glass by the seatbelts they had luckily had time to secure before setting off, although they were sure they had matching sets of broken ribs by now. All this was not helped by the knowledge that this was Giles’ car. His new, shiny, red car he had left behind mistakenly believing it would be safe.

After barely rounding another corner alive the sound of a phone ringing filled the air. Buffy, turned to look at Willow and Tara in the backseat questioningly but they just shrugged.

“Oh it’s mine,” Anya piped up cheerfully, “it’s probably Xander.”

She took one hand off the wheel and rooted through her bag which led to a chorus of screaming and terrified shouts from the car’s other occupants.

“Anya!”

“Eyes on the road!”

“Keep driving I’ll get it!”

Buffy whipped the bag out of Anya’s hand so she could get her attention back on the road and searched its contents until she found the phone. Anya gripped the steering wheel with both hands again leading to a collective sigh of relief from the others while Buffy answered.

“Hey, Xander? Hi. Yeah everyone’s fine. Willow and Anya accidentally released a trollgod from a crystal and we’re on its trail now. Yeah I know. Oh no his car’s not stolen we’re in it. Ummm Anya’s driving.”

Buffy winced and held the phone away from her ear and they could all hear Xander’s shout of surprise.

“Xander calm down, we’re fine, she’s…she’s doing okay…well yeah but we’re still alive and…”

“Hey!” Anya objected.

“Look it can’t have gotten too far we’re bound to catch it soon. Okay. Sure, hopefully we’ll have it dealt with before you even get there but the more the merrier and it’s probably a good idea to have someone with a license drive us back. Okay, bye Xand.”

Buffy hung up and returned the phone to the bag.

“I’m guessing he paid a trip to the Magic shop huh?” Willow asked.

“Yup. He was worried we’d all been obliterated or something and that Giles’ car had been stolen. He’s going to follow the path of destruction and try and catch up to us.”

“Guys,” Tara spoke up, “anyone notice where this trail seems to be leading us?”

They looked at their surroundings and it clicked.

“The Bronze.” Willow and Buffy clarified.

“We’re almost there. Want me to put my foot down?” Anya asked and they all stared at her incredulously.

“Has your foot ever not been down?” Willow enquired.

“Well no, not exactly but that’s what they say in the movies right?”

A few minutes later they’d pulled up, or rather, screeched to an abrupt halt, outside the Bronze and all four of them rushed in. Whatever carnage they had prepared themselves for, nothing could have prepared them for what they actually saw upon entering. The Bronze was mostly empty and intact, aside from a broken pool table and a few people standing around, frozen at the sight that had halted the gang in their tracks. Sitting at a table in a corner opposite them sat Spike and the troll, drinking beers and eating chicken wings in the middle of deep discussion.

“What.The.Hell?” Buffy asked.

Chapter 7

Spike wasn’t quite sure how it had happened really. One minute he was standing there expecting the troll to hammer him, literally in fact, and the next they were chatting away about relationships and what a bloody waste of time and effort they were. He guessed his already defeated look and resignation to getting pummelled peaked his new buddy Olaf’s interest. The big guy was obviously used to people fleeing in terror from him. So he asked Spike if he could find him some babies to eat with his ale. Spike decided it probably wouldn’t go down too well with the Slayer to send a troll to the hospital in search of newborn happy meals with legs so he offered to provide him with the Bronze’s speciality chicken wings and blooming onions. Disappointed at first, the troll was convinced to at least try the food and while he didn’t think it was as good as babies was soon happily feasting away.

Somewhere along the way they’d got talking about their problems with women, probably due to the beer, and Spike learned how Olaf had been turned into a troll after his girlfriend caught him cheating on her, although he argued that it really wasn’t cheating since he was drunk and this one barmaid had attached herself to him. In turn, Spike had moaned about Drusilla, how she’d been his salvation and then destroyed him, punishing him for something he didn’t know he’d done. If she hadn’t left him he might not have found himself in this new mess with the girl he was made to hate. He had just moved on to Buffy, without mentioning the fact that she was the Slayer when the girl herself and her friends arrived.

“It’s jus’, I think I deserve some respect, yeah? I mean she was all over me and jus’ cos her friends show up she decides I’m dirt again. I’m not completely dim, I mean I get that whatever this thing between us is it’s wrong but we clearly both want it and she could have at least stayed to talk about it y’know. Tell me she doesn’ want anythin’ to do with me. Not jus’ walk off without a backwards glance.”

Olaf nodded in sympathy and picked up another keg, biting it with his teeth and swallowing the entire contents before picking up a handful of chicken wings and stuffing them in his mouth.

“Women are nothing but trouble my friend. They seem so delicate and sweet, you just want to take them home and keep them with you, protect them while they take care of you, but they are devious and vicious. They don’t want you unless you are all theirs, no more than a dog that they own. You think everything’s fine and then one day you wake up and find she’s turned you into a troll! All your friends turn on you and you get chased around with pitchforks. At least she made me a troll god with power.”

Olaf raised his hammer in the air, swinging it around happily to demonstrate the source of his power.

“I soon adjusted and brought much destruction upon those puny mortals who turned on me.”

He dropped the hammer down with a thud, suddenly glum. Spike was about to say something when Olaf slammed his hand down on the table sending their food flying and making a rather large dent in the mettle.

“Then those witches! Filthy witches came with their magic and imprisoned me! For centuries I was trapped, unable to feel anything! Arrgh a CURSE on ALL WITCHES!”

Olaf stood up then waving his arms about angrily and roaring. Spike decided to step back, cradling his beer. It looked like the rampage was back on, Olaf’s quest for food and ale being temporarily satisfied. Glancing away from the enraged troll he finally spotted Buffy and her little gang staring at him open-mouthed. He scowled at her and had just made up his mind to ignore her and leave when Olaf also spotted the small group, halting his tirade.

“Anyanka! You’ve brought the witch here to stop me. How dare you try to imprison me again. All of this is your fault!” he accused, pointing his hammer at the nervous blonde trying to hide behind Buffy.

Everyone turned questioning eyes on Anya but before she could respond the door flew open and Xander arrived.

“Guys you’re okay, where’s? Woah! That’s a lotta troll!”

He skidded to a halt and Anya grabbed hold of him trying to ignore the puzzled looks of the people around her.

“How exactly does he know you and how is it your fault?” Willow asked.

Xander frowned in confusion and turned to face his girlfriend.

“Huh?”

Spike had pretty much figured it out from his chat with Olaf earlier and deciding he enjoyed stirring things up and seeing the Scoobies squirm enough to forego walking away from the Slayer he was still annoyed with, stepped up and offered an explanation.

“Well from our chat earlier I gather the ex-vengeance demon there is my new pal’s ex, who, incidentally, is the one who made him a troll.”

Four pairs of eyes stared at Anya in stunned disbelief before Buffy broke the silence.

“You dated a troll?”

Spike snorted. Like she could judge with her track record. She decided to ignore him, refusing to acknowledge his presence right behind her.

Xander was staring at his girlfriend in horror.

“I didn’t date a troll! I just turned him into one because he cheated on me, which is how I got the job as a vengeance demon, interestingly enough.”

Xander blinked and then attempted to speak.

“You…a troll…you turned your boyfriend into a troll? Before you were a vengeance demon?”

“He cheated on me! I did everything for that oaf and he betrayed me!”

Olaf swore and hit the wall with his hammer.

“I didn’t cheat. It was one barmaid when I was drunk! It hardly deserved being turned into this!”

“I was in a lot of pain! I thought you loved me and how dare you judge me? I’m not the one who took all of two minutes to find his inner savage nature and destroy his village.”

“However quickly I adjusted to the situation I was forced into is not the point Anyanka. What matters now is that I am free! I will not allow you to imprison me again. I have far too much veangance of my own to wreak upon this disgusting world, starting with the witches!”

Olaf swung to face Willow with an evil grin, hefting his hammer, preparing to strike.

“Oh no you don’t! Willow! Tara! Get moving on that spell!” Buffy cried urgently, charging at the troll to get his attention away from the red-head.

Olaf swung his hammer at her but she was ready for him this time and rolled out of the way. She hopped to her feet next to him and punched him right where his kidneys should be. Troll, as it turned out, was not so easy to hit and Buffy did more damage to her hand than to him.

“Ow.”

She clutched her hand and shook it briefly, glad to feel it wasn’t broken but had to drop and roll as the hammer came flying at her head again.

The Scoobies looked on, still huddled together in their little group. Willow and Tara were busy with their incantation and Xander and Anya stood hanging on to each other watching the fight. Spike stood next to Xander, sipping his beer and looking on with interest. He loved watching Buffy fight.

“You could maybe help you know,” Xander commented, not really expecting much from the vamp beside him.

“No thanks mate. Had my share of brawls for a while. Sides,” Spike sniffed, taking another sip of his beer, “Slayer’s job right? She should be able to handle things like this. That and I don’t care very much.”

That was a lie of course but Olaf was a trollgod after all and in his current state there wasn’t much Spike could be expected to do. Plus he was still pissed at the Slayer. Might do her some good to realise he came in handy in a fight sometimes if she didn’t have his help. Might get some bloody sense knocked into her. Then we’d see if she just ignored him and walked off after gettin’ all worked up… Of course if she got into real trouble now she wouldn’t have a chance to learn anything. Maybe he should help…

Xander took his eyes off the Slayer and troll who were still swinging at each other without landing any blows to take in the vamp’s appearance for the first time.

“What happened to you?”

Spike continued to watch the Slayer, a slight frown of worry on his face, thinking that maybe she was in over her head here.

“Huh? Oh, nothin’. Jus’ got into a fight with some demons that don’ like me very much.”

“Well gee there’s a surprise.”

Spike ignored the sarcasm dripping off Harris, focusing instead on the battle and wincing when Buffy barely missed getting hit in the face with the nasty looking hammer.

“How’s that spell coming guys?” Buffy asked as she ducked again.

Willow looked up at her friend.

“Just a minute it’s almost done.”

“Well hurry it up. I’m not getting much damage in here. Oof.”

Buffy caught a glancing blow off of Olaf’s fist that sent her reeling back into the stairs leading up to the balcony.

“Get rid of the hammer! It gives him strength!” Anya called out, deciding to help.

Easier said than done, Buffy thought.

Olaf continued to advance on her and Buffy got an idea. It was a slim chance but it might work. She sprang up a few steps and waited for his next attack. She was above him now and was hoping the higher ground would help make him attack her the right way.

Raising the hammer again, Olaf swung it at her as fast as he could, putting all his power behind it. She hopped over the railing at the last second and the hammer flew in between the steps and bounced off one of the supporting beams underneath. Twisting the hammer as he drew back the troll was caught off balance when it lodged between the steps and grabbing her chance, Buffy jumped, aiming both feet at him and kicking him away from his weapon. The hammer dropped down under the stairs and now she was between him and it.

“Let’s see how good you are without your little toy.”

Advancing on him, she prepared an uppercut to his bearded jaw, but found herself thwarted when his meaty fist grabbed her arm and he backhanded her, sending her spinning backwards where she just barely managed to keep on her feet.

“What the?”

“Troll luv. Not exactly a lightweight.”

Buffy scowled at Spike. Know it all.

Just plain common sense, he thought to himself, seeing her annoyed look.

Taking her eyes off the blonde vamp to avoid a punch to the face, Buffy brought her attention back to the fight at hand. So the troll was strong, no matter, she’d kicked plenty of monster butt in the past and he was no exception. She just had to hit a little harder, after all, she’d been itching for some good fights lately and no matter how tough this Olaf guy was, he didn’t come close to Glory. She just had to hold him off until that spell was finished.

“Bloody hell Slayer, what’s gotten into you? Where’s the girl that kicked my ass every time I arrived in this town? I gotta tell you, you’re performance right now? Well, let’s just say I am deeply shamed.”

Buffy took a moment to throw him a scathing glance.

How dare he criticise me? Not like he’s exactly helping right now.

“Shut up Spike!”

Spike nodded and tilted his head, jutting his chin out.

“Oh yeah, real original. I’ve said it before an’ I’ll say it again, it’s not my problem if you don’ like hearin’ the truth. Right now, those fightin’ skills of yours, stink.”

Xander scowled at him even though he kind of agreed. Buffy wasn’t up to scratch like she normally was, but then she had a lot to deal with lately and losing Riley couldn’t have been easy on her.

“Hey, bleached menace, you think she’s so bad why don’t you take him on?”

Spike looked at him unconcerned.

“Like I said, I had my fair share of fightin’ lately and it’s her job, she should deal with it. Besides, I kind of like the guy, not so bad really, and it was your bird that made him like that in the first place.”

Anya frowned at him and moved from behind Xander to look the vamp in the eye.

“Hey! It’s really unfair to put all the blame on me. He made me mad and I punished him, nobody’s perfect. And like I said it only took a few minutes before he was killing and maiming his so-called friends and eating babies. He’s perfectly happy as he is, maybe even happier.”

Spike rolled his eyes.

“Oh yeah, I’m sure everyone’s better off from the result of your first trip down vengeance lane and it all worked out for the best. Good on you.”

The three continued to bicker and scowl at each other while Willow sped through the incantation faster, sensing the tension brewing from everyone else in the room. Buffy was livid.

While she had managed to keep enough of her focus on the troll to avoid another brutal knock-out, it was a real struggle not to abandon the fight to punch Spike in the nose. An urge she was still resisting with difficulty.

How dare that ignorant, rude, selfish, cocky, good-for-nothing tell me I’m a bad fighter. I’d like to see him take on a trollgod. Stupid vampire! It’s his fault I’m off my game anyway, at least partly, with all his distractions and making me all confused. Argh if I didn’t have a troll to deal with right now I’d go over there and then we’d see who could kick whose ass. Chip or no chip, I’d beat that cocky smirk right off his annoyingly gorgeous face.

She grumbled and huffed, irritated that even when she was mad at him, she’d found him good-looking.

No, he’s not good-looking, he’s stupid. A big dumb vampire in need of a major ass kicking.

Buffy watched as Spike said something to Anya that had Xander gasping and staring at his girlfriend and guessed it must have had something to do with something the troll told him about when they’d been dating and narrowed her eyes. He was always causing trouble. Just then, Olaf got a punch in and she hit the stage of the Bronze, causing the gang to look in her direction.

That was it! She’d had it with the stupid troll and his abnormal strength and the stupid vampire that kept distracting her. She couldn’t kick Spike’s ass right now so she’d just have to settle for hitting the next best thing and that would have to be the troll.

“Alright that does it! I’ve had just about enough of you! I have enough to deal with without dumb trollgod’s getting out of hand because of something that happened centuries before I was even born. I shouldn’t have to deal with this shit!”

Buffy jumped up on stage, glared at the dumbfounded troll, and threw herself at him, aiming a roundhouse kick to his head that sent him spinning backwards and crashing into a nearby table.

Satisfied that she was finally doing some damage, Buffy stayed on the offensive and punched and kicked the surprised creature into submission.

Anya, Spike, Xander and Tara looked on with matching expressions of shock. Willow was doing her best to continue with the almost complete spell although she wore a fairly dazed look herself.

The chit’s completely lost it, Spike thought as he watched her pummel Olaf around the Bronze.

The others had never seen her get quite so pissed, except maybe when Angel had been in trouble. After all no one messed with her boyfriend, but she’d flipped, swearing and beating the crap out of the monster she’d been struggling to hold her own against just moments before. She must really be stressed to be acting this way, was the Scoobies collective thought.

Another solid punch sent Olaf flying back against the wall, where he sank to the ground unconscious. Just then Willow finished her spell and a pinkish mist surrounded the fallen troll, before a loud pop sounded in the air and he and the mist vanished into thin air.

Buffy sagged, exhausted, wiping the sweat from her brow and panting from exertion. Her adrenaline was going down and she was beat.

Willow was pretty flagged herself. Portals to other dimensions took a lot of work and sapped a lot of her energy. Noticing her girlfriend’s weakness, Tara placed an arm around the redhead to steady her and Willow smiled at her gratefully.

Anya relaxed against Xander and heaved a sigh of relief that her ex was gone.

Xander himself seemed relieved although probably more because Buffy seemed to have returned from crazy town. The way she’d beaten on the troll had him a little scared. She was all Slayer when she did that and it was pretty frightening, not at all like the girl he knew.

“Wow Buff, you really wailed on that guy. I’m guessing you worked out a few issues just now too huh?”

Buffy nodded and gave him an embarrassed smile. She really had lost it. She was just so mad, and it was all his fault.

Buffy frowned when she noticed Spike finish his beer and begin to stalk away, as best he could with his limp, towards the back door, trying to sneak out. Leaving her friends to examine the damage and the hammer that had been left behind, she hurried to catch up to him as he made his way outside, catching him in the alley.

“Oh no you don’t. Just where do you think you’re sneaking off to?”

Spike sighed and turned around to face her, his shoulders slumped.

Bloody hell, can’t I get a minute’s peace ‘round here?

“What do you expect me to do? Fun’s over, time to head home.”

“So what, you’re just gonna walk off cos your new friend’s gone and you can’t annoy me or my friend’s anymore?”

“Judgin’ by the way you’re lookin’ at me I’d say I’m still doin’ a pretty good job of annoyin’ you, and did you maybe think that you lot are the one’s pissin’ me off? I come here for a nice quiet drink only to be interrupted by a trollgod that your pals summoned. So I stuck around to see how things ended, I was curious, but I’m not gonna stick around for the clean-up or to hear you all congratulatin’ each other on another job well done.”

Buffy crossed her arms and stepped a bit closer to him, but not too close, she’d learned what could happen if she didn’t keep space between them and she was mad at him dammit.

“Your quiet night didn’t seem to be too thrown out of wack when we got here, sitting down drinking beer and eating chicken wings together.”

Buffy looked him over, just now taking in his injuries.

“Or maybe I was wrong. What happened to you, you fight him before you got all friendly together or what?”

“This,” Spike said, pointing to his black eye as he spoke, “did not come from Olaf, alright? I went to Willy’s last night after, well let’s be straight about it, after you ditched me in the graveyard and as it turns out I don’ have too many friends around there anymore. Claim I’ve been makin’ war on the demon world since I started helpin’ you so once again my life, or unlife, has gone to complete shit because of you,” he said, now pointing at Buffy.

“Me?”

“Yes you Summers. It’s cos of you Dru dumped me, cos of you I kept comin’ back here an’ wound up with a chip in my head an’ cos of you I can’t show my face in demon bars anymore.”

“How is any of that my fault?”

Spike chuckled humourlessly before staring at her seriously.

“You are kidding right?” Seeing her staring back at him, genuinely confused and sceptical gave him the urge to wring her bloody neck for being so dense.

“Because, you stupid bint, I can’t get you out of my bloody head, alright!”

He looked to the heavens as if asking the powers that be to give him strength before continuing.

“Everywhere I go you’re there. At first I thought it was jus’ my obsession with killing you, the one that got away an’ all that rubbish but it wasn’t. Dru knew, knew before me. I had nothin’ but respect for you an’ what you did to Angel, you don’ have to be a genius to figure out that was the hardest thing in the world for a person to do and you managed it when you were still pretty much a kid. She punished me for feelin’ that way about you. Then I came here to get revenge but look where that got me, a helpless, shameful excuse for a vampire thanks to this chip an’ now, now I go an’ realise I have feelings for the Slayer.”

Buffy balked at his confession. Spike had feelings for her?

How? What? How? I mean sure I knew he wanted me but that was lust, wasn’t it?

They just desired each other, which was natural after all the time they’d spent together fighting, first with each other and then side by side but that’s all it was right? Spike couldn’t actually care about her, could he?

“Yeah shocked me too, that did,” he said, noticing her expression, “not too keen on actually feelin’ somethin’ for someone whose job it is to kill my kind but there you have it. You didn’t think all that snoggin’ was just meaningless fun did you? Because I gotta tell you, havin’ you run off and ignore me after things get hot an’ heavy between us is not my idea of fun.”

“I…I didn’t mean to…”

“Sure you did luv, your buddies arrived and it was business as usual, had all your excuses lined up ‘til I caught you off guard, don’t pretend you didn’t.”

“Spike this is nuts. What happened was wrong. You have to know that. We hate each other, you can’t have feelings for me.”

“You think I don’ know how wrong this is Summers? Trust me I’ve tried everythin’ I can think of to get you out of my system but you won’t leave. You’re in my throat, in my gut. I’m drownin’ in you Summers I’m drownin’ in you.”

Buffy shook her head, refusing to believe it. This could not be happening.

“No. No no no this isn’t happening. You’re confused Spike. What you felt, what we did, it was just lust okay. A lot of pent up sexual tension that somehow developed between us but that’s all it is.”

Spike shook his head.

She just doesn’t bloody get it.

“It’s not just lust Buffy, if that’s all it was I could’ve gotten you out of my head, found you alone and gone farther than we did last night. I spent more’n a week tryin’ to deal with that kiss, cos it gave me hope, I’d never believed we could really have somethin’ ‘til then but after you kissed me…it was a crumb. Now, I can’t let it go and I don’ intend to but you’re not ready an’ I’m far too drunk, pissed off and sore to deal with it right now. I’m goin’ home.”

Spike turned and started to walk off. Buffy was too stunned to stop him. He’d just given her even more to think about. Could he actually have feelings for her? It would explain why he was so nice to her that night after the way she treated him. She watched his retreating form and a random thought popped into her head.

“Spike?”

He stopped and turned his head, but made no move to walk back to her.

“If you and Olaf didn’t fight,” she hesitated, “ how did the pool table get broken?”

It didn’t matter but it was the only thing she could think to say.

“Durin’ our chat, asked if he’d like to play, he’d never played before and thought it looked like fun, it didn’ go well.”

“Oh.”

Buffy nodded embarrassed. Spike studied her and turned and walked off. Buffy was thoroughly confused and her headache was back with a vengeance.

Great. Nice mess you’ve gone and gotten yourself in now Buffy.

Chapter 8

“Wait, wait, wait. Let me get this straight. Spike, as in the evil vampire Spike, has feelings for you?”

Buffy rubbed her temples and looked back at her mother, sitting on the couch next to her. She’d been going over the events of last night a thousand times trying to work out when exactly Spike had decided he cared about her rather than trying to kill her before deciding she couldn’t deal with this on her own anymore. Normally she would have gone straight to Willow or Xander with her problems but Spike wasn’t too popular with her friends, especially Xander, and she couldn’t face telling them about her make-out sessions with him. Her Mom wouldn’t be too happy either but at least she seemed to tolerate Spike and hopefully could give her a solid opinion.

“For the thousandth time, yes Mom. Spike said he has feelings for me and that he’s respected me ever since the truce we made.”

“I’m sorry honey it’s just I’m having trouble taking this in. I mean he seems like a nice, um, vampire, as far as vampires go but don’t you two hate each other? Hasn’t he spent his time trying to kill you?”

Buffy leaned back on the couch.

“See that’s what I thought but lately he’s actually been trying to help me and he’s been almost…nice. It’s weird. Do you see what I’ve been dealing with?”

Joyce nodded and frowned while she struggled to understand. She was none too pleased with the idea of another vampire having an interest in her daughter but at least Spike was honest about himself and Buffy had told her what was going on.

“Buffy, is there any reason you can think of for his behaviour? Did you…lead him on maybe?”

Buffy froze.

“No.”

Joyce eyed her suspiciously.

“Buffy?”

Buffy sighed and hesitantly met her Mom’s eyes.

“Okay so I might have kissed him once…or twice, but he claims to have had feelings for me way before then and I never meant for it to happen, the first time I just felt needy and he happened to be there and then he took me by surprise the second time, I totally wasn’t expecting it.”

Joyce stared at her eldest daughter who finally paused for breath.

“You kissed him. Twice. Buffy, what were you thinking? Do you like him? When did this happen and what do you mean you were needy?”

“I don’t know. I wasn’t really thinking at all, we just kissed. The first time was when I found out you were going to the hospital. I was really worried about you and Spike showed up out of the blue the way he does and helped distract me from all the scary thoughts of what might happen and somehow it just led to kissing. As for liking him…I really don’t know. I mean he’s my enemy or at least he’s supposed to be. It’s just really confusing.”

Joyce put her mug down on the coffee table and leaned back absorbing all this new information.

“So, you felt vulnerable and took comfort from Spike. This was when you were still with Riley?”

Buffy nodded glumly.

“May I ask if that had anything to do with why you two broke up?”

“No. We weren’t right together at all and I didn’t feel enough of what he wanted me to feel for him. I just never realised how different we were. Riley didn’t know about the kiss but Spike was one of the issues we couldn’t work out. Riley’s always hated him and he threatened to go after him even though he’s harmless with the chip. It was a side of him I didn’t like. It’s not like I chose Spike over Riley, but he was the one who was always there when I needed him and respected when I needed space. I didn’t expect that from him.”

“Well that’s news to me. I had no idea you and Riley had problems like that, although I have to admit that you did seem pretty distant those last few months. Now about this second kiss. You said he took you by surprise?”

“Yep. I was on patrol and he turned up. Of course I was expecting him to bring up the kiss but he didn’t, just kept talking about stuff he’d been doing when he wasn’t around for so long and then he just kissed me.”

“Okay. Now have I misunderstood about the Slayer strength thing? You couldn’t have maybe stopped him? You kissed him back didn’t you.”

It was really more of a statement than a question and Buffy squirmed under her Mom’s scrutiny.

“Pushing him away didn’t really occur to me at first, I was caught off guard, but then…Mom he’s a really good kisser. I know it sounds like a strange excuse but he’s had over a hundred years of experience and it really isn’t easy to stop when a guy kisses you like that.”

Joyce’s eyes widened and she blinked a few times. She wasn’t sure if she was happy or not that her daughter was choosing to be so honest with her, then again she could understand where she was coming from. She agreed that Spike probably did have a lot of talent, and she wasn’t blind. He was a very attractive man, um, vampire. Which was the problem wasn’t it.

“Whatever…experience…he may have the fact is you kissed him back and that would suggest that you wanted to kiss him. Are you attracted to him? Because that’s what he’s going to think.”

“I guess I am a little attracted to him…sorta…I mean he is kind of a hottie…but he’s also really irritating and a vampire and he doesn’t have a soul and he’s tried to kill me tons of times and he so wouldn’t be helping me without the chip.”

Joyce sighed. It was certainly complicated but she couldn’t honestly say she wanted her daughter seeing another vampire. On the other hand, she did want her to be happy. The problem was, she wasn’t sure what Buffy wanted.

“Sweetheart. You know how I feel about vampire’s and you…dating them, but I’d be lying if I didn’t at least say that even if it is just because of the chip, and after my previous experiences with both, I much prefer soulless Spike to Angel.”

“Mom! How can you say something like that?”

Joyce raised her hands defensively.

“All I’m saying is Spike has always been honest with me, right up to how evil he is…was…anyway, Angel was always the suspicious older man getting my daughter into trouble, can you blame me for liking Spike more? Not to mention he’s never tried to kill me.”

Buffy gaped at her mother, not quite believing what she was hearing. She always knew her Mom didn’t like Angel but was she actually rooting for Spike? How on earth could her Mom be telling Buffy to…to what? Give him a chance?

“Are you actually telling me to try dating Spike?”

“Let’s not be hasty. Of course I’m not telling you to date a vampire I’m just giving you my opinion on Spike with regards Angel. What I think you should do is figure out what you want. Whether or not you have feelings for him because it seems to me like you’re not sure if you do or not but that you do care about his feelings for you. Basically you need to decide where you stand, what you want and then talk to him, and you need to do it soon because he won’t stay away until he gets an answer. One thing I’ve learned about Spike is that he’s determined.”

“You’re right, I know you’re right, but how am I supposed to figure this out?”

“Afraid I can’t help you there Buffy. Only you can figure it out.”

“Yeah I know. Sometimes I really hate being the one that makes the decisions. Oh and Mom? Please don’t say anything about this to anyone. They’d freak if they found out and I really want to sort out my feelings before dealing with any interventions or attempted Spike stakings.”

“Of course I won’t say anything but their reactions are all the more reason for you to figure this out soon. Not telling them will hurt them more than anything you’ve done and who’s going to stake Spike?”

“Giles and Xander. Thanks Mom. Talking about it helped a little. I really needed to share this with someone before I drove myself nuts.”

Joyce smiled and gave her daughter a hug.

“You’re welcome honey. Let me know how things go okay?”

“How what things go?”

Joyce and Buffy jumped at the sound of Dawn’s voice. Neither had noticed her come in.

“Nothing,” Buffy jumped up from the couch, “you finished school already?”

Dawn narrowed her eyes at her sister and looked at Joyce who instantly averted her gaze, smiling as if everything was perfectly normal. No one tells me anything around here.

“I’m always home at this time. You two must have gotten really caught up in talking about nothing.”

Buffy grinned nervously at Dawn and Joyce continued to avoid meeting her youngest daughter’s suspicious eyes. Dawn huffed and headed for the stairs.

“Fine don’t tell me. I didn’t want to know anyway. It’s probably something stupid.”

Buffy exhaled in relief and shared a knowing and grateful look with her Mom.

“I guess I should go. Giles said the Council want to come here for a visit. Who knows what they want now. I need to figure this out before they get here and give me more trouble.”

“Good luck honey.”

“Thanks, I’ll need it.”

***


Praying that Spike wasn’t going to chance one of his reckless walks in the sunshine to confront her at the Magic Box, Buffy quickly made her way to the training room through the back door. She was hoping to avoid any conversations with the gang to give herself time to think things through.

Buffy began her breathing exercises and stretches before working out, all the time battling with her thoughts.

Say Spike does have feelings for me, he said he respected me after the truce, that I can understand, but when did that change to actually having feelings for me? And what does he mean by feelings anyway? He says it’s more than lust but what does that mean? He couldn’t actually…love me could he? No of course not you need a soul to love and he doesn’t have one.

She started working on the dummy, focusing her punches and checking her coordination.

But he loved Drusilla for a hundred years. Was that really love though? Not on her part that’s for sure, but Spike, he stayed with her and cared for her for so long. Maybe he really did love her. He refused to let her be harmed. What he felt for her went beyond what a vamp feels for their sire didn’t it?

Okay so say he can care about someone. What do I feel for him? I don’t want him to get hurt, I worry about him, which is a new experience. I’m attracted to him, which isn’t such a surprise. Annoying or evil he’s still hot. That’s really unfair. Why can’t normal guys look that good, or at least living guys?

Focus Buffy, his looks aren’t the issue here, even if they did contribute to your predicament. I want him. If I’m really being honest with myself I do want him. I’ve dreamed about him before. But I’m allowed to fantasize, it’s normal, you can’t control what happens in your dreams. But what we’ve been doing is real.

He’s mad that I ditched him. I didn’t mean to but I was freaked out, he just pulled that kissing stunt on me when I was confused. I needed time to think. And what was he doing getting himself beaten up like that? He knows demons don’t like him. He’s been helping me kill them for crying out loud.

Buffy paused to catch her breath and stretch.

He’s been helping me a lot actually. At first he just wanted to kill things but he’s been getting more involved in my battles. He helped Giles when he got turned into that Fyarl demon, for money of course but if he really was my enemy still he would have just killed him wouldn’t he? You’d think that’s what he’d want. Then he helped Tara when her family said she was a demon and wanted to take her away. He actually helped even though there was nothing in it for him. Maybe he is changing.

Buffy could here people moving around in the shop and recognised her friend’s muffled voices. They’d probably come looking for her soon. She decided to wrap up her training for now.

What does it mean if he is changing? Does it mean I should give him a chance? He won’t give up, like Mom said he’s determined, and I gave him a crumb. Should he have a chance? Do I want to give him a chance? Maybe I should go talk to him. I need to know what he really feels, or at least thinks he feels. I need to know if he can change. He’s an unusual vamp anyway. Maybe he does have the ability to be good without a soul.

Buffy was just about to head in when the door opened and Xander peeped around, grinning when he saw his friend.

“Hey Buff, Giles is back. He flew here ahead of the Council to talk things over with you. You ready to come out and see what the deal is?”

“Sure. Let’s get it over with. I’d rather know ahead of time what they have in store for me."

***


Giles was looking pretty worn out, whether from the flight or his visit with the Council, Buffy couldn’t tell but she guessed it was probably both.

They all gathered around their usual table, Giles sat in front of the stairs leading to the more dangerous books in the shop, Willow and Tara sat to his left while Anya and Xander sat on his right. Buffy decided to remain standing across from him. She knew this wasn’t going to be good news from the look on Giles’ face and she wanted to hold her position of authority in case she was asked to do something she didn’t like, reminding them who was in charge here.

“So Giles, what’s the scoop? Are they going to help us or not and why do they feel the need to pay us a visit?”

“They refused to give me any useful information on Glory while I was there. They say they will only discuss what they know with you in person. However, they do have information to share with us so at least we won’t be completely in the dark.”

“Alright. What’s the other reason for their trip here? I know them well enough to know there’s more going on here. What do they want Giles?”

Giles sighed and removed his glasses so he could rub his tired eyes.

“Travers wants to run an evaluation.”

“An evaluation?”

“Yes. Given the circumstances of you being without an official watcher and turning your back on the Council they want to see how capable you are as a Slayer and how you have managed to survive as long as you have. If you pass the evaluation they will share what they know with us.”

“They’re testing me. What happened to me being all they’ve got? What are they gonna do if they decide I’m not up to their standards?”

“Buffy you will pass. You are one of the longest lasting Slayers in history, there’s no way they can fail you.”

“Oh but they can Giles and we know what they’re like with their tests, or did you forget the cruciamentum?”

Giles winced at the reminder of how he’d betrayed Buffy’s trust because of Council’s orders.

“Of course I haven’t forgotten. My point is that you will pass, just like you did then, because you do things your own way. As you said what would they do otherwise? They can’t fight Glory without you, this test is just a formality and a way for them to reassert their authority.”

Buffy didn’t like the sound of this test at all. She wasn’t so sure the Council would play fair.

“Well since we don’t have a choice either I guess I just have to hope you’re right. Okay, there’s not much we can do for now until they get here so let’s just call it a night. I’m sure you could use some sleep Giles.”

He nodded gratefully and the others gathered their things, preparing to leave. Buffy was headed for the door when she heard Willow calling her.

“Buffy? You going on patrol?”

“Yeah, I’m just going to do a quick sweep and then head home.”

“You want some company?”

“No thanks Will. I doubt there’s much going on out there and I like the quiet. I won’t have much time to myself when the Council get here.”

Willow nodded and turned back to Tara while Buffy left. She wasn’t exactly telling the truth about patrolling. She was going to visit Spike and get the answers she needed to help her know what she really wanted with the peroxide blonde vamp.

***


Spike had woken up with one hell of a hangover. Thankfully his injuries had healed quite a bit and his lip had healed almost completely. He still had his black eye although the swelling had gone down considerably. He’d cleaned up his ear so all in all he wasn’t looking that bad. He still had a few bruises on his body but his limp was barely noticeable now. Healing was one vampire perk he was grateful for.

Thinking things over he was annoyed with himself for walking off on Buffy. He probably should have confronted her, but then he was right when he said he was too drunk and sore to deal with it. The last thing he needed was to have her beat him up as well.

And what the bloody hell was that about the soddin’ pool table? After he’d confessed his feelings that was all she had to say? He couldn’t understand her way of thinking. Was she going to be friendly with him or get angry or just ignore him completely? Was she just going to pretend she hadn’t heard what he’d said? Well there was no way that was happenin’. He wouldn’t let her forget and she had to know that. So what was the chit playin’ at?

Slipping on his jeans so he was at least decent if anyone barged in to his crypt but foregoing a shirt, he made his way upstairs to the fridge to get some much needed blood. He’d stocked up plenty and he was going to need it to heal faster. The sooner he was back to full strength the sooner he could get out there and interfere with the Slayer’s patrols. Maybe if he got in her way, taking out the nasties before she could she would give in and talk to him.

He gulped down his blood and smirked at the thought of how much it would piss Buffy off if he did her job before she did. At least that was one thing he was good at. He knew the only way she stood a chance of takin’ down that troll was if she got mad. Anger was her fire. She was a force to be reckoned with when the wrath of the Slayer was brought out in her. He hadn’t quite intended to piss her off that much. She’d completely flipped. Then again, she had been stressed over that Glory bird lately so all she needed was a little shove to send her over the edge. She might have gone to crazy town for a while but still it was beautiful. The way she moved, the look in her eyes. You knew she was gonna win with that look. And win she did. A trollgod and she wiped him out, it was no wonder he couldn’t kill her back when he was still tryin’ to. Although luck had been on her side quite a bit too.

Spike grabbed a bottle of whiskey and made his way over to the telly, pausing to light a few candles in the crypt on the way. Sure he had a hangover but once he got drunk again he wouldn’t feel it. No sense in soberin’ up this early. Besides the soaps were starting and he didn’t want to miss anything.

It occurred to him that his life could be a bleedin’ soap at this stage. He was hopelessly in love with Buffy, who supposedly hated him but obviously wanted him too, only she wouldn’t give in and be with him because of the way she’d been conditioned to think that because he was soulless, he couldn’t really feel and she placed so much value on her friend’s approval she wouldn’t let herself have what she wanted. They would be horrified if they knew she’d kissed Spike and been close to him so she kept it hidden and stubbornly refused to accept what had happened between them was anything real, and definitely not what she needed.

Spike took a large swig from the bottle and grimaced at the first taste of the fiery liquid making it’s way down his throat, burning him up from the inside, the same way she constantly burned him up, made him feel warm in a body that was long dead.

If only she’d give me a chance to prove myself. To prove to her that we could be so good together. We match.

He let out a resigned sigh, took another drink and stared blankly at the television screen, not really paying attention to anything happening on whatever program was on.

That’s never goin’ to happen though is it? She won’t let it. Never goin’ to get a chance to show her, even if she would hear me out there’s always something goin’ on, some big bad that has to be dealt with or some Scoobie crisis that needs fixin’ pronto. Never goin’ to have the time alone with her to let her find out.

Spike puzzled over his time with the Slayer lately and her wistful expression before she pushed him away flashed through his mind. If he could get her alone, bring her defences down, maybe she would be willing to find out. It was her job as the Slayer and the Scoobies that were holding her back. If she could just be herself with him for a few minutes without any pressure there was hope.

Told her she’d given me a crumb didn’ I? She knows I’m not givin’ up on her so maybe the fact that she hasn’ shown up here to shut me down already means she’s considerin’ it after all. Would I really be deluding myself if I think Buffy might think about lettin’ me in? That she might actually be curious about…us?

Time was going by quickly. She’d be on patrol soon. Maybe he could catch her alone again, only hopefully without any interruptions this time. He rose from his chair and switched off the telly he hadn’t really been watching and put his bottle back in it’s place by the fridge. He needed to grab a shirt and his duster and head out to find her. He was just about to drop down into the lower level of his crypt that served as his bedroom when his senses triggered.

Someone was approaching the crypt. He stayed perfectly still and focused. Light footfalls, getting closer, the scent, one he knew so well, a heartbeat, beating rapidly the closer she got to his door. Buffy was coming to him.

He grinned as he faced the door. For the first time, she was coming to him and it had nothing to do with looking for information on some demon, at least he hoped not. No, she knew he would bring up the one thing that had been plaguing his thoughts lately. She had to be here to discuss it to.

He waited expectantly while on the other side of the door she paused.

***


Outside, Buffy was willing herself the courage to continue. He was inside, waiting. She could sense him. She felt his presence and her breathing quickened. Ever since that night on the back porch his presence had been a source of comfort and peace for her. Now that she was facing up to all her conflicting emotions about him her nerves were winning out over any comforting sensations. She was about to face him and confront him about his feelings for her. She wasn’t sure she was ready for the answers she might get but she had to know. She couldn’t deny what was between them any longer.

Whatever happens, happens. Whether it means discovering he really has changed and I have feelings for him too and giving him that chance, or finding out he’s still just an evil vamp I should have dusted years ago, I have to know. This dance has to end tonight. Maybe then a new one will begin.

***


Spike was beginning to lose his confidence the longer she waited. He began thinking she’d flee again while she still had the chance.

Well sod that! I’m not lettin’ her get away again.

He took two steps forward with the intention of flinging open the door and dragging her inside when he sensed movement and he paused. Slowly the door began to open, creaking loudly. He watched as she entered cautiously, closing the door behind her.

He swallowed loudly. She looked marvellous by the soft glow of candlelight in his crypt.

“Buffy.”

“Spike.”

She looked up, facing him with a serious expression on her face.

“We need to talk.”

“That we do.”

They stood at opposite ends of the crypt facing each other. No more running. They were going to sort this out now. They just didn’t know where to begin.

Chapter 9

An eternity seemed to pass by as they stood motionless, facing each other. Spike was waiting for her to make the first move, be the first to break the silence. She’d made her way to him, now she needed to be the one to mention this thing between them. Buffy knew he was waiting for her but she was having trouble focusing at the minute.

Spike shirtless! God he looks good, like a Greek God. Where did he get a body like that. All muscular and lean and chiselled. Look at those abs! Yummy.

Realising she might actually be drooling, Buffy tried to shake thoughts of how lickable Spike’s torso was from her head and focus on the topic at hand.

You’re here for answers Buffy. You need to understand what Spike feels and since when and find out if he’s really changed, not jump his bones, even if he does look rather delectable half-naked and bathed in candlelight.

She whimpered as she struggled to avoid looking at Spike’s body and focus on his equally attractive face. He really wasn’t making this easy on her. Why, oh why did he have to be shirtless? She’d never seen him without clothes before and that was probably a good thing. It was difficult enough to deal with dreaming about your enemy without the knowledge that not even your wildest fantasies had done him justice. The way he was quirking that sexy scarred eyebrow of his at her, almost as if he knew what she was thinking, wasn’t helping either.

Stupid sexy vampire.

“Ahem, Spike I have some questions…about what you said last night…how you have…feelings…for me.”

Spike nodded and waited patiently.

Great, he’s gonna make me drag it outta him.

“Well…you made it sound like you’ve been feeling different about me for a while, respecting me I can understand, but when exactly did those feelings change? How long have you…since you realised?”

She fidgeted nervously, wringing her hands and waiting for his reply, glancing at him from under her eyelashes.

She’s adorable when she’s nervous. Focus Spike, now’s not the time, now answer her question.

Well if I’m bein’ honest, I’ve lusted after you for ages, prob’ly since the beginning only I never allowed myself to act on those feelin’s. I resented havin’ to go to you for help after the chip but when you actually helped me…I guess I didn’ really wanna kill you after that, any more’n you really wanted to stake me. As for when I realised I felt more for you, well, that happened after that attempt I made to get the chip removed by that army doc you had called in for your soldier boy. I was so pissed at you, always there gettin’ in my way…”

Spike shook his head at the memory and chuckled before returning her gaze.

“I had a dream about you after that. I was kissin’ you, you told me you wanted me and I told you…I scared myself awake with that dream. I couldn’ believe it, didn’ wanna believe it. I begged for it not to be true but I knew. That’s when I knew, and when the stalkin’ began.”

Buffy nodded slowly. She remembered how he’d suddenly taken to following her around, interrupting her on patrol and the several occasions she’d found him under the tree by her house, the ground littered with cigarettes as though he’d been there all night. Now she was pretty sure he had.

“What was it you told me? What did you realise that scared you so much? What did you tell me in the dream Spike?”

This was what he was nervous about. Plucking up all his courage he readied himself to tell her what he knew she had to hear to understand, what she might not want to accept, but what she had to know.

“I told you…that I loved you. I do Buffy. I love you.”

Buffy gasped and raised a hand to cover her mouth as her jaw dropped and her eyes widened.

He said it! Oh God, he said he loves me! Spike loves me!

“You? How? Why? How can you love me? We don’t…I’ve never…the way I treated you…the way we treated each other! I don’t understand.”

Spike strode towards her purposefully. She was too stunned to notice or move away. He grabbed her by the arms and forced her to look up at him.

“Buffy, I don’ understand how it happened either but it’s true. I love you. I have for a long time now. First it was hate, then lust, then admiration mixed with resentment but somehow it became love. I can’t stop thinking about you Buffy. You’ve become part of me, changing me. You make me want to be better, to help you and not just because I can hit demons or get paid for it. I’ve been helpin’ you for a while now without gettin’ anythin’ in return. Let me show you Buffy. Let me prove to you I can be better, that I can change. I’ll do it Buffy, for you I’ll do it.”

Buffy was shocked. She couldn’t answer him, everything he’d said racing through her mind. She’d come here looking for answers and he’d given them to her. He loved her and he was changing and she believed him. She couldn’t doubt the truth in his words. He was always honest, the truth often hurt more than any lie and she knew she’d trusted his word in the past when he was her enemy so how could she doubt him now? Add in the desperation in his voice and she knew how sincere he was. He could love, and now, he loved her.

“Spike, I believe you.”

Spike looked at her in awe. She believed him? He thought for sure she’d be repulsed, would push him away and deny everything he said he felt for her but instead she’d accepted it. Instead of running she was here in his arms, looking back at him, a mixture of nervousness and fear evident in her expression. He knew she was unsure of what was supposed to happen, what she should be feeling. He wanted to reassure her. He wanted her to know that he’d never hurt her, that he’d do everything he could to prove himself to her.

“Buffy, luv, give me a chance please. Let me prove how good we could be together. We match Buffy. You and me, we’re equals, you have to see that. Please luv, let me show you?”

Buffy stared up into his warm blue gaze and felt herself melting. God how she wanted him. She wanted to give him that chance. He was right. They did match.

But her friends. They’d never understand, and Giles…Spike would always be an enemy in their eyes. If she hadn’t allowed him to get so close to her she wouldn’t have believed he’d changed either. She would have ignored it the way they would. She thought back to her conversation with her Mom. Joyce had given her, her honest opinion about Spike, even without a soul she liked him more than she ever would Angel, and even though she hated the idea of her daughter dating a vampire she wanted her to be happy, so she’d told her to figure out what she wanted, and she knew now, she wanted him.

Buffy reached up to caress his cheeks, taking in every detail of his defined features.

“Show me Spike.”

And he did.

A look of disbelief crossed his face before changing to amazed delight and he pulled her to him tightly and kissed her.

“Oh Buffy luv, thank you. Thank you, thank you, thank you.”

He punctuated each word with a tender kiss, brushing his lips across her face, worshipping every inch of her, before meeting her mouth with his own. He slid his tongue along the seam of her lips until she parted them, allowing him entrance.

Their tongues tangled in a battle for dominance as the kiss grew more passionate and their hands began to wander over one another’s bodies.

Buffy relaxed against him, enjoying the feeling of being enveloped in his arms, his cool skin pressed against her. She’d never thought of Spike as tender but he was so gentle, so loving, he made her feel safe and she knew that no matter how wrong it appeared, it felt absolutely right.

Spike still couldn’t quite believe this was happening. Buffy wanted him and she wasn’t going to deny herself any longer. She wanted him to show her what they could have and he was determined to prove they belonged together.

When she had to pull away for breath, Spike turned his attention to her neck just like he had before and Buffy felt the trembling sensation at the mixed feeling of her Slayer side warning her of danger and the effect of Spike nuzzling her neck and ghosting his lips and tongue over her sensitive skin.

She wanted more so she ran her hands over his bare chest, learning the feel of every trembling muscle. She flicked one of his nipples and was surprised at the rumbling noise that vibrated from his chest.

“Did you just purr?”

“No.”

She did it again and the same noise emerged from her actions.

“Oh my God you did. You purr! That’s so cute.”

Spike raised his head and scowled at her.

“Oi! I do not purr, and I’m not cute.”

She grinned mischievously at him and thrust against him, eliciting a little whimper when she felt his erection press into her stomach.

“Yes you are. You’re cute and you’re hot and you’re sexy and you purr.”

Spike growled and pulled her into another passionate kiss that had her gasping for air when he finally released her.

“You forgot to mention strong and dangerous and…” he ran his hands up under her top and over her lace covered breasts, tweaking her nipples and making them harden into stiff peaks, grinning when she moaned in pleasure, “…bad.”

She studied him under heavy-lidded eyes, her mind clouded with lust for the cocky vamp. She stroked the soft blonde curls at the nape of his neck and scraped her nails across his shoulder blades, leaving little red trails along his skin and making him hiss at the painful pleasure.

“You are. You’re very, very bad.”

She moved in to kiss and suck at his neck and he threw his head back, giving her full access to do what she wanted, rubbing her breasts and sliding one hand down to her ass which he squeezed. She ran her tongue along his pulse point and suddenly bit down, not hard enough to break skin but enough to be painful. Spike grunted and she looked up at him, a dangerous gleam in her eyes.

“Yeah you’re bad, but so am I.”

Spike didn’t think it was possible for him to be any more turned on but the sight of Buffy with a wicked gleam in her eyes, kneading his pale flesh, her lips swollen from his kisses had him painfully hard and aching for release. He had to have her, now.

With a primal growl he lifted her up, and giggling in pleasant surprise, she wrapped her legs around his hips, feeling his erection rubbing against her sensitive centre through their pants. She clung to him and bent her head for another heated kiss, while he supported her with his hands gripping her thighs and moved towards the open entrance to his bedchamber.

The thought that things were going a little fast entered Buffy’s mind briefly, after all she had only just made her mind up to give him a chance but his kiss was erasing the thought and she knew there was no point kidding herself. She wanted this, had been ready to jump him in the cemetery, it was inevitable really.

He dropped down carefully with her still wrapped around him and walked towards his bed where he deposited her gently, still kissing her fiercely.

This needing air thing can be really irritating, Buffy thought as she pulled away again to draw in more oxygen. She sighed in pleasure when Spike went back to her neck, caressing her skin with his hands as he trailed them up and down her sides. But I guess it’s okay as long as he does that.

She vaguely took in her surroundings and realised she was in a secret part of his crypt she’d never seen before. Somehow she’d always assumed he slept on those sarcophaguses upstairs but clearly he was above that if the king-size she was currently sitting on was anything to go by. He had a fridge and a T.V. so she really shouldn’t be surprised.

I guess this is what he meant when he said he was fixing the place up. Is that a Persian rug?

She had no more time to assess the rest of the décor, however, as Spike pulled away from her neck making her moan in protest at the loss of contact.

He looked down at her and grinned.

“S’alright kitten, I’m not stoppin’, jus’ thought you might wanna remove some of those clothes. Seems only fair an’ all.”

Buffy blushed at the thought of Spike seeing her naked.

I’m really going to do this. I’m really going to sleep with Spike.

Spike frowned when she went quiet, noticing her blush and worried she might be changing her mind.

“Buffy?”

She looked up at his questioning voice and saw the worry in his face. She shifted around so she was kneeling on the bed and more or less level with him, taking his head in her hands and looking him straight in the eye.

“I want you Spike. I want this. I’m just a little nervous. I never thought we of all people would be doing this. I haven’t exactly had a great track record with men and after all the stuff you said about me and how you feel, I don’t want to be a disappointment.”

Spike was stunned. She was worried about disappointing him? What crazy world was this? The woman of his dreams, who was way too good for him and gave out of his league a new meaning was nervous that she wouldn’t live up to his expectations?

“Buffy there is no way in hell you could ever disappoint me luv. You’re amazin’. I love you, I love everythin’ about you. Those other gits didn’ know what they had and if things fell apart it’s because they had no bloody clue how to treat a woman like you. Anythin’ that went wrong was because they weren’t good enough, not you an’ I think I’ve made it clear that I’m not goin’ anywhere.”

Buffy smiled at him and felt her eyes moistening with tears. He really loved her. No one had ever said anything like that to her before. She may be a confident fighter and leader but when it came to relationships she always feared getting her heart broken. She’d been hurt so many times, it was part of the reason she’d been so distant with Riley. After Angel and Parker she was afraid to let anyone in.

But Spike’s not like that.

Spike wasn’t like that. He never left her, even when they were on opposite sides he was always there, it was why that one night he’d vanished had freaked her out so much. She couldn’t remember a time since he came back to Sunnydale that he wasn’t lurking around somewhere.

Leaning in she kissed him softly, a long, lingering kiss, putting all her feelings into it, trying to show him how grateful she was that he would always be there for her. He kissed her back lovingly, holding her securely. It was a long time before they broke apart.

When they did, Buffy gave him another shy smile before easing back and lifting her top up over her head slowly and dropping it to the floor. His eyes glazed over as he appreciated her and when she couldn’t take the intensity of his appraisal anymore she pulled him down to her, leaning back on the bed until her head lay on the pillow and he was hovering over her.

They kissed more fervently and she caressed his back, enjoying the feel of his muscles moving beneath his skin as he moved above her, thrusting gently, stoking the fires of their desire for each other.

Slowly he moved downwards, kissing her shoulder, moving along her collarbone and down between her breasts. He paused to suck at a nipple through the fabric of her bra and she arched up into him.

“Hmmm Spike,” she breathed.

He caressed her other breast gently with one hand while the other lowered slowly over her abdomen and down to the waistband of her pants. He carefully undid the button and lowered the zip before slipping his hand in to caress her through her panties.

“Hah, mmm yes.”

He moved his head to give her other breast the same attention with his mouth only this time he lowered the bra so he took her bare nipple into his mouth, catching it between his teeth and rolling his tongue around it.

She arched against him, moaning her pleasure loudly, gripping his hair to hold him there while one hand grasped at his arm, needing to hold on to him.

He continued to rub her slowly and gently despite her desperate attempts to thrust against his hand in search of more friction. He decided to move down her body again, smirking when he heard her whimper as his mouth left her nipple. He trailed kisses steadily down her stomach and ran his tongue around her navel before slipping it inside making her groan aloud. He continued his exploration, keeping his eyes on her face and watching her expressions of pleasure.

When he reached her pants he paused and halted his caresses. He waited until her eyes focused on his before he gripped her pants and tugged gently.

Understanding dawned and after a hesitant pause, she raised her hips, allowing him to slide the tight pants she insisted on wearing down her legs with some difficulty. He removed her boots and pulled her pants off completely, now kneeling at the bottom of the bed.

He took in the vision before him and shivered at the gorgeous sight. Golden skin, rivalled only by her shiny gold tresses, fanned out over his pillow, shadows flickering over her body from the glow of the candles. He licked his lips and thanked the Powers That Be for delivering such a goddess to him. The flimsy black lace of her underwear was all that hid her from him and he didn’t intend to keep it there much longer.

“Spike,” her husky voice called to him as he continued to stare at her.

He looked up to meet her eyes and she trembled at the predator she saw there. He lowered his head and kissed the inside of her ankle as his hands travelled up her calves and thighs, teasing her and making her body shiver at his touch. He moved up slowly, kissing every inch of her and she felt herself getting impossibly wet as he drew nearer to her aching pussy.

When he reached her inner thigh she gasped and clutched his hair. He nuzzled the damp patch of her underwear and then licked along it, right over her heated core.

“Ahh, Spike!”

He tugged at the thin lace quickly and tore the garment off her body before she even registered what he was doing. Before she had time to complain, however, he dove in and licked her slit from bottom to top in one long sweep.

“Gah! Oh my God!”

She bucked under him and he held her steady. He raised her legs and spread her open before him taking in the sight of her pink, wet pussy and inhaling the intoxicating scent of her arousal. He growled as she overpowered his senses and set about worshipping her the way she deserved.

As he kissed and licked at her, Buffy writhed mindlessly beneath him. He was a fantastic kisser so it figured he’d be amazing at this as well. She’d never experienced pleasure like this before. Riley had tried but his tentative slurping couldn’t even come close to what Spike was doing to her. Of course Spike was a very orally fixated vampire, that much she knew already.

He tapped her clit with his tongue and she tugged on his hair sharply, thrusting up against him. He placed one hand firmly on her abdomen to hold her down while he took the delicate nubbin into his mouth and sucked on it before nibbling it with his teeth and she squealed.

“Spike! Oh God yes! Unh! Yes!”

He replaced his mouth with his thumb and licked along her slit again, tasting her and spreading her juices.

“Buffy, you taste so bloody good luv. I wanna devour you, gonna eat you up.”

“Yes Spike. Eat me, oh God!”

He plunged his tongue deep into her and she arched off the bed. When her panting and thrusting became more urgent he took her clit in his mouth again, applying pressure with his tongue and driving two fingers into her.

“Oh Spike! I’m close! Please!”

She didn’t need to ask twice. Spike felt her inner walls tightening as he fucked her faster with his fingers, increasing the speed and pressure of his tongue on her clit, he grazed his blunt teeth over the sensitive pearl and soon she collapsed around him.

“SPIIIIKE!” she cried out as she came and he continued sucking at her clit, prolonging her orgasm and turning her limbs to jelly.

When she finally came down from her high Spike was smirking up at her with his chin resting on his hands on her stomach, looking rightfully pleased with himself.

“Enjoy that kitten?”

“I should think that was obvious.”

He grinned and lifted himself up, prowling up along her body like a jungle cat until he could look directly into her eyes.

“I told you I’d make you feel good, and we haven’t even gotten to the main event yet.”

Buffy wasn’t sure she could handle the main event. He’d turned her to mush, but the look of hunger in his eyes even after he’d feasted on her and the prominent bulge in his pants was making her wet again and she knew she wanted more of him. She needed him inside her.

“Speaking of the main event, why have you still got pants on. You took mine off cos it wasn’t fair remember? Well this hardly seems fair to me.”

He grinned and kissed her again. She could taste herself on him and it only turned her on more. She decided to take matters into her own hands, literally in fact, undoing his belt and unbuttoning and unzipping his jeans with lightening speed. She reached in to grab hold of him and release him from the confining denim.

Hmmm, Spike goes commando. Actually it’s a wonder he fits into those tight jeans.

“Bloody hell, Buffy! Oh touch me pet.”

She happily complied stroking his throbbing member firmly, swiping her thumb over the top to spread the pre-cum and lubricate his cock, increasing her speed as his unnecessary breathing sped up.

She was so hot, Spike felt a familiar tightening in his balls and halted her hand with a tremendous effort.

“Hang on luv, you’re doin’ a little too well an’ I wanna be inside when I cum.”

Buffy agreed and moved her hands to his jeans again, pulling them down. She struggled a bit and looked at him for help.

“Off,” she demanded and he obliged.

“Bossy little bint,” he grinned at her, kicking his jeans off until he was completely naked.

“One more thing.”

He reached down and removed her bra so that she was also completely exposed and settled himself between her thighs again. He rocked against her and they both moaned loudly at the feeling of his cock sliding between her slick folds.

They shared a look and finding what they each sought in the other’s eyes, began their new dance.

Spike eased himself inside slowly, inch by painstaking inch. Buffy felt herself widening around him, stretching to accommodate him. She couldn’t take the slow torture any longer and raising her legs and clasping them around his waist, she bucked upwards while simultaneously pulling him in fully. He was totally enveloped in her hot core and Spike struggled to get a grip on himself. Buffy cried out as he was fully sheathed inside her and filling her up perfectly.

God he feels good!

Bloody hell, she’s gonna dust me, burn me up. So hot. I’m never leavin’ here. Never, never, never.

He began moving inside her, thrusting slowly at first until he felt her responding and then increasing the pace.

Buffy met him thrust for thrust and she clung to him desperately.

“Spike. Harder. Faster.”

“Buffy!”

He altered his pace, giving her what they both wanted. He pulled out almost fully and then rammed back in, twisting his hips and hitting a spot inside her she didn’t even know was there.

“Unh! Oh fuck yes! Spike, right there!”

He pounded into her, hitting that sweet spot inside that fast had her approaching completion. She squeezed her inner muscles around him, strangling his cock and making him groan from the sensation.

“Yes! Yes! Yes!”

“Fuck! Buffy! I love you! I love you so much!”

Buffy screamed her release, his declaration of love floating in the air around her as everything burst into white hot stars in her eyes.

Spike roared his own end when he felt her come apart under him, clamping around him with her Slayer muscles, flooding him with her heat and he emptied himself inside her.

They were both panting desperately as the aftershocks ran through them. Spike collapsed down on top of her before rolling to the side so as not to crush her. They both moaned as he slipped out of her and Buffy willed herself to move so she could curl up against him.

“That was incredible.”

He kissed her temple and wrapped an arm around her, pulling her closer.

“You’re tellin’ me. You were amazin’ luv. I’ve never felt anythin’ like that.”

“Me either.”

The two blondes lay nestled against each other, completely spent and in absolute bliss. It had taken a lot for them to get here and they were both emotionally and physically drained. Spike was still struggling to comprehend that it wasn’t all some wonderful dream. He was determined to keep her now she’d come to him and once they were rested he’d really prove how good he could make her feel. Gradually her breathing slowed and Spike pulled the covers up around them as they settled in to sleep.

Chapter 10

Buffy was having a wonderful dream. Spike was nuzzling her ear and doing that purring thing, brushing feather-light touches across her stomach.

“Mmmm, Spike.”

“Hey kitten. Ready for round two?”

He nipped at her ear and Buffy opened her eyes and realised she wasn’t dreaming after all.

She blinked to focus and saw Spike staring at her with adoration evident in his eyes, a gentle smile on his face she’d never seen before, so unlike his trademark smirk and it made her melt.

She reached up to touch his face, now completely healed and he leaned into her hand, turning his head slightly so he could kiss her wrist softly.

“I thought I was dreaming for a minute there but you really are here.”

“Course I’m here pet, I was the one worried it was a dream, can’t tell you how happy I was to wake up with you beside me, all warm and soft and wrapped around me.”

She smiled up at him and Spike thought it was the most beautiful thing he’d ever seen in his unlife. He bent his head down for a kiss and she responded instantly, wrapping one hand around his waist while stroking his messed up blonde curls with the other.

She pulled away after a minute and looked up at him, continuing to run her hand through his hair.

“Bed-hair suits you. You’re all sexy, more so than usual.”

There it was, that trademark smirk of his. He rolled his tongue up under his teeth and she felt herself getting wet at the sight.

“Gotta say, the freshly shagged look suits you too pet. Might have to keep you here, work on making you look even more stunning.”

She mock-gasped and smacked him lightly on the shoulder.

“You are such a pig Spike.”

“Oink oink baby, it was you that started it.”

“Yeah but my way wasn’t so crude. Although, now that you mention it I’m sure we could get that hair of yours even spikier, would look much better than the slicked back look you’re so fond of, and you say Angel uses too much hair gel.”

“Oi! Peaches does use too much of that stuff, it takes barely anythin’ to keep my hair lookin’ good, and what’s wrong with my hair, it’s damn sexy an’ you know it. Plus can we please not talk ‘bout that poncy ex o’ yours, or any o’ them for that matter, spoils the mood.”

Buffy rolled her eyes before leaning up to give him a quick kiss on the lips.

“Okay, no more talk of the past. More kissing instead.”

He grinned and kissed her again, holding her head with one hand, supporting his weight with the other.

“Now that’s more like it. Got a lot to teach you pet. Been dreamin’ ‘bout this for ages, got a lot of catchin’ up to do.”

“Hey I know stuff. And anything I haven’t done I’m pretty sure I’ve heard of, probably from Anya. I doubt there’s anything you could teach me.”

Spike raised an eyebrow at her and smirked again.

“Yeah? You do realise I have over a hundred years of experience on you luv. What do you wanna bet there’s tons of stuff I could teach you? In fact, I was holdin’ back last night, not up to my full strength and worn out from tryin’ to convince you this could work, but now I’m gonna show you exactly how well we match each other. It’s gonna be better than all those amazin’ fights we had.”

He was holding back last night?

Buffy considered what an unrestrained Spike would be like in the sack and shivered with excitement at the thought. Then again, she hadn’t exactly let herself go last night either. She was so used to holding back with her human partners in case she hurt them. Spike was a vampire, however, and she had no doubt he could take whatever she gave him, he had when they fought so it would make sense he could handle her Slayer strength in bed too. The idea that it could be better than the thrill she got when they fought was exciting her even more and she made up her mind.

Vamp’s not gonna know what hit him.

“So quit yappin’ and teach me.”

She pulled him down for a passionate kiss, tongues tangling, bodies thrusting, searching for friction. Spike’s hand moved lower and she moaned into his mouth when he stroked her folds. He dipped a finger in to stroke her slit and spread the juices already pouring from her around, lubricating his movements. He ran his finger in circles around her sensitive area and she growled in frustration as he avoided the place she needed him.

Spike chuckled at her frustration and continued to tease her.

“Somethin’ you want luv?”

“Spike, quit teasing and touch me.”

“Thought I was touchin’ you kitten.”

“You know what I mean. Mmmm. Give me what I want or else.”

He grinned at that and raised that sexy eyebrow of his again.

“Or else what?”

He stopped stroking her and Buffy looked at him, eyes blazing.

Oh he was gonna get it.

Buffy placed both hands firmly on his chest and pushed, rolling them over so he was on his back and she was straddling him. She moved slowly back and forth, her wet folds sliding up and down his rock hard cock, making him moan loudly. She lowered her head and waited until he opened his eyes and looked at her.

“Or else I’ll take charge and you’ll really be in trouble.”

Spike’s eyes widened.

A little minx isn’ she? Figures she’d enjoy bein’ on top, an’ I got no complaints ‘bout that.

“Kitten’s got claws huh? Should prob’ly behave myself…then again…”

He winked at her and without warning gave her a sharp smack on the ass. She yelped in surprise and glared at the widely grinning vamp under her.

“Oh now you’ve done it.”

Buffy was enjoying this. She was looking forward to wiping the smirk off his face and having him beg her the way he wanted her to beg him. She held his gaze as she raised herself up, positioning herself above his rigid shaft, gripping him tightly with her right hand she guided him to her entrance.

Spike’s unneeded breath was coming in short pants as he watched her, his hands firmly grasping her hips.

She sucked in breath as he penetrated her and when the first couple of inches were securely in her heat she exhaled and slammed down on him suddenly, taking him in completely.

They both shouted at the pleasurable invasion and Buffy’s nails dug into Spike’s skin as her body stretched around him. He was holding tightly to her, trying to control himself. She was in the driver’s seat now and she would set the pace.

Buffy regained control of herself, loving the feel of him inside her, as if he belonged there. She rose up slowly, tightened her muscles and pushed down again quickly. Spike hissed as she sank down and his grip tightened.

“God Buffy! So fuckin’ tight, luv. So hot. Feels so good.”

Buffy repeated the movement, gradually building speed and Spike began urging her to move faster, guiding her hips, praising her as he thrust up to meet her. She began panting as warmth spread through her, her own pleasure building. She circled her hips when she came down, rubbing her clit against his pelvis and groaning at the incredible sensations coursing through her body.

Spike raised his hands up, running them over her stomach and up to her breasts, massaging them, stroking her nipples with his coarse fingers and she leaned back, balancing herself on her arms, the new angle stretching her even more and making them both cry out.

“Unh. Unh. Unh. Yes. Unh. Spike, I’m so close!”

“Cum for me kitten! God Buffy please! I wanna feel you fall apart around me.”

Buffy threw herself forward again, grabbing his wrists and pinning them above his head, the new angle putting her breasts above his face which he took full advantage of, sucking a nipple into his mouth, making her groan. She moved faster and he thrust up harder, the tension in her body increased and she felt something building up quickly, about to spill over.

“SPIKE! OH GOD YES!”

She slammed down on him once more, her muscles tightened and she spasmed around him as her climax overtook her. She trembled and shook as each shockwave hit her, pressing his wrists into the bed as she rode out a powerful orgasm.

Spike used every piece of self-control and willpower he had in him to keep his own pleasure at bay. He wanted this to last but god she would be his bloody undoin’ the way she rode him. Her Slayer’s muscles were in full effect as she came and it was the sweetest pain he’d ever felt, makin’ it hurt in all the right places. She’d had her turn in the driver’s seat, now it was his turn to show her who’s boss.

Buffy had barely come back to herself after her powerful release when Spike swept her up in his arms, sitting up and stretching her legs out either side of him. He clutched her boneless body to him as he kissed her collar-bone, licking the sweat beads that had gathered along her neck, wiping her damp hair out of her face. She noticed he was still hard inside her and just as this registered in her melted brain, he began moving, thrusting into her and maneuvering her hips to move against him the way he wanted.

“Again? You don’t give a girl much time to recover do you?”

“Come on Slayer, I know you got it in you. We could dance all night. See? You’re already primed for another go.”

Buffy realised she had started to gyrate her hips in time with his movements.

That Slayer stamina comes in handy when you’ve got a horny master vamp under you.

Buffy found she liked this position, she was getting a lot of friction in all the right places and having Spike hold her at perfect kissing level was also a major bonus. She took full advantage of this, smashing her lips against his and probing her tongue against his slightly parted lips, begging entrance to that tasty mouth.

They kissed furiously, increasing their rhythm. Spike intended to show her he could give as good as he took and it was about time he taught her a few things he bet she hadn’t tried with those pathetic poofs she’d been dating.

Buffy was happily enjoying the steady pace and kissing when Spike growled and keeping a firm hold on her ass, shifted around and raised himself up on his knees, propelling her backwards without warning. She squealed in surprise, flinging her arms out to steady herself and found herself bent backwards over the end of the bed, balancing on her hands, her hair brushing the rug she’d admired the night before, her legs either side of Spike’s hips as he knelt at the end of the bed, thrusting away and taking in every glorious detail of the stretched out Slayer in front of him.

“Spike! What are you…Ooohhh Fuck Yeah! Mnah!“

"Time I taught you a few new tricks Slayer. All those acrobatics o’ yours are gonna come in real handy. Unh! Take it Buffy! Show me you can handle a master vamp!”

Buffy could do little to respond. Each powerful thrust making her cry out. His balls slapping her ass, giving her even more pleasure.

He was ramming into her, loving the sight of her tits bouncing, long, shampoo commercial hair swinging wildly back and forth over the rug. Her gasps and moans reverberated around the crypt walls, a chorus ringing in his ears.

“Come on Slayer! I know you love this, love havin’ me pound into you! Give it me good Buffy!”

Those words. He’d said them before. The night she’d pushed him to the ground in defiance, denying him. Buffy wasn’t going to make the same mistake again. He wanted to dance and this time she was going to dance with him.

She locked her legs around him, steadied her hands as best she could and pulled him forward as she pressed against the ground, pushing herself onto him, meeting his powerful thrust with one of her own.

“UNH, YEAH, THAT’S IT PET! THAT’S MY SLAYER! FUCK ME BUFFY!”

She let go, using her Slayer strength to meet that of her vampire lover. The walls echoed with the sound of their coupling, wild animalistic sounds emerged from their throats, flesh slapping against flesh. Their pleasure built in them rapidly.

Buffy’s back arched up in a position only achievable through advanced acrobatic skill as they both fell over the edge into that abyss of pure, intense feeling. She pulsed around him as he exploded into her. An inhuman roar sounded from his throat and she screamed something that might have been his name.

They were incapable of movement while the aftershocks rolled over them. As they grew less intense Spike leaned forward to grab Buffy by the waist, and, using the last of his strength, hoisted her up off the floor to meet him and they tumbled back onto the bed, her lying on top of him, panting desperately for air.

When the world finally stopped spinning Buffy trailed a hand across Spike’s firm pecs.

“Wow.”

“Wow,” he repeated.

“I think you broke me.”

He chuckled and rubbed her back soothingly.

“Nah, no more than you broke me. An’ if I did I’ll just take my time puttin’ you back together, though I’m pretty sure those healin’ powers of yours will take care of that.”

“Mmmm, I don’t think I’m gonna be able to move for a while.”

“Good, cos I have no intention of lettin’ you out of my bed jus’ yet.”

Buffy smiled and started tracing patterns across his chest, revelling in the feel of his strong arms encircling her.

“As much as I’d love to go another round, although God knows how that’s possible right now, I’m gonna have to get up sometime. There’s a whole world outside this bed that needs it’s Slayer.”

Spike growled and held her closer, possessively. Buffy got a warm fuzzy feeling from his behaviour. He made her feel really wanted, but what she said was true, she would eventually have to face the outside world and the longer she spent here in his arms, the more difficult it was going to be to tear herself away.

“C’mon stay with me. I finally got you Buffy, don’ ask me to let go now.”

“Spike I’m not going anywhere…”

“Good.”

“Hey! You didn’t let me finish!”

“Sounded like a good place to end that sentence to me.”

“Spike.”

Buffy swatted him on the chest and raised her head up to look at him.

Oops, bad idea Buffy.

She was met with a pout that made him damn near irresistible and Buffy was having a much harder time convincing herself to convince him he had to let her go.

“Stop with the pouting it’s unfair! Look you’re not going to lose me alright but I have to go soon. For one thing Mom will probably call out the search party if I don’t show up and I need to check on her and Dawn. Glory could be up to something and there’s the Council who’ll be dropping by for a visit at some point. I promise this isn’t over okay. I made my decision and I’m sticking by it.”

Spike regarded her and sighed when he recognised her resolve face.

“Fine, but only cos I don’ want your mum or the Nibblet gettin’ worried. The others can get stuffed for all I care.”

“Spike.”

“What? It’s not like they’ve given me any reason to like ‘em over the years, ‘cept maybe Glinda but she wouldn’ hurt a fly, not in her nature. Not to mention the way they’ll react when they find out about us.”

He suddenly went very still and silent. When he spoke again he tried to seem casual but to Buffy he sounded unsure and tentative.

“Are they gonna find out? Or are we keepin’ this strictly between us?”

Buffy instantly knew why he sounded so nervous. He knew how her friends would react to the news. It would be intervention time for Buffy, that is if they didn’t jump straight to staking Spike first. He needed an answer though. She knew he wanted her to tell her friends, he didn’t want to hide their relationship. She also knew he was unsure whether they had a relationship, afraid that being back with her friends would change her mind.

Why wouldn’t he think that, it’s exactly what’s happened the last few times we were together. I see my friends, the world comes crashing back and I run off on him.

She knew the longer she waited before answering him the more unsettled he’d become but she honestly didn’t know herself yet. She was afraid to tell them because of what they might do to him if they found out. On the other hand she knew she didn’t want to give this up, and not just because of the most amazing sex she’d ever had, but because Spike really loved her and he wouldn’t leave her. He understood her better than anybody and she couldn’t let him go, especially now she might be developing certain feelings for him too. She had to reassure him.

“Spike look at me. I want this, I want you. Not just the sex but to be with you. I want to be your girlfriend.”

Spike took all this in and knew she was being completely serious. He beamed at the thought of being Buffy’s boyfriend but the look on her face informed him she wasn’t finished.

“Why do I sense a ‘but’ comin’ on?”

“I don’t think I can tell my friends yet. Not because I don’t want to,” she hurried to explain, “I just don’t think it’s the right time yet. They’ve got their hands full with Glory and now this Council visit…they’re running an evaluation on me before they’ll give up any information and I really think it would be better to wait until after they’re gone to drop this bombshell. Not everyone will be pleased with the news and it wouldn’t help to have everyone fighting when the Council get here, and I don’t want you getting hurt. I want to be able to defend you but if the Council get in the way when someone decides to get stake happy…”

Spike reached up to lovingly caress her cheek. Buffy was worried about him, and while keeping them a secret wasn’t something he was thrilled about, he understood why it had to be that way, at least for now and he wanted to put her at ease.

“It’s okay pet, I get it, I do, not exactly thrilled but I’m willin’ to keep it quiet, for now. Don’ suppose it would do to have the Council findin’ out you’re dating a vamp when they’re testin’ you’re capability as a Slayer.”

Buffy smiled, relieved he was taking it so well and understood where she was coming from.

“Thank you. It means a lot to me that you see it that way. I promise I’ll tell them, just not yet, not until this thing with the Council blows over.”

Spike nodded and pulled her to him for a tender kiss. It was starting to turn into something else before Buffy made a monumental effort to pull back and extricate herself from the disappointed vamp’s arms.

“Where the bloody hell are you goin’?”

Buffy sat back on the bed, keeping out of his reach.

“I told you I had to go soon to let Mom know I’m still alive and check on Dawn.”

“Yeah but I didn’ think you meant this soon.”

She frowned at him and stood up to gather her clothing.

“The longer I stay the harder it’s going to be to leave and we both know that kiss was leading to more than a simple cuddle. If I don’t go now I never will.”

“Sounds like a plan.”

“Sure, until my friends come in here to ask you if you’ve seen me and find us having wild, naked sex in your bed. Great plan.”

Spike did the tongue thing again, leering at her.

“Be worth it for the fun we could have.”

“No, not when we could have a lot more fun, without you meeting a dusty end and me being institutionalised.”

She finally found her bra and quickly put it on, followed by her top and located her thong, which she discovered had been ruined when Spike ripped it off her.

Darn I forgot he did that. And I liked this pair too.

She discarded the ruined piece of lace and pulled her pants up, sitting down on the bed to pull her boots on.

“You owe me new underwear you know.”

She squealed when Spike grabbed her from behind, pulling her against his chest and kissing her breathless.

“No point. Only gonna rip ‘em off later. Matter of fact, you should prob’ly think ‘bout wearin’ skirts more often too.”

“Yeah, patrolling in a skirt with no underwear sounds like a great idea. Let go, I have to leave remember.”

“Not even a kiss goodbye?”

“Okay one more but then I really have to go.”

He wasted no time pulling her to him again and put everything into the kiss, it was soft and tender and wonderful and, dammit, he was convincing her to stay again.

He grumbled in protest when she pushed him away and practically leapt off the bed, leaving him scowling up at her.

“Okay, you had you’re goodbye kiss, now I really have to leave.”

“C’mon pet, one more, please?”

He gave her such an innocent look she was almost tempted but shook it off, there was no way she was buying that.

“Uh uh. I’m on to you. There’s no way I’m going near that bed again. At least not until later, after I’ve reassured everyone I exist.”

Spike sighed melodramatically and gave her the biggest eye roll she’d ever seen.

“Fine,” he huffed, “go. You are coming by later then? Or am I gonna meet you on patrol?”

“Patrol might not be a good idea. I don’t know when the Council are gonna get here, so, I’ll meet you here tonight, after, kay?”

“You’d better, or I’ll be the one sendin’ out a search party. Now get that luscious arse o’ yours outta here before I’m forced to drag you back here an’ chain you to the bed.”

Buffy paused and cocked her head.

“There are chains?”

She dodged as a pillow flew at her head.

“Okay, I’m going, I’m going,” she laughed, sprinting out of the bedchamber and up the ladder.

I’ll have to look into the chains thing later.

Chapter 11

Buffy quietly shut the door behind her when she got home. The whole point of coming home was to let her Mom know she hadn’t been killed or injured out patrolling last night but she would really prefer to take a shower and change her clothes first. She just knew Joyce would ask about Spike and she really didn’t want to have that conversation while showing all the signs of a wild night of sex. Her lack of underwear was another reason she wasn’t keen on running into her Mom. She couldn’t be expected to talk to her mother while she was commando. The thought alone was embarrassing enough.

So far so good.

She had her foot on the second step when Joyce’s voice called to her from the basement.

“Buffy is that you?”

Buffy winced.

Darn. What, does she have sonar or something?

“Yeah Mom it’s me.”

“What kept you out so late, are you all right?”

“I’m fine Mom, I, uh, I kinda want to change and freshen up a bit. You know, vamp dust and demon goo, I’ll tell you about it later okay?”

“Okay. I’m doing laundry now. Do you want me to toss those clothes in as well?”

“No thanks, I’ll take care of them later. I should rinse them off first, don’t want monster guts clogging up the machine.”

“Well okay then. I’ll have lunch for you when you’re ready.”

“Thanks Mom, you’re the best.”

Breathing a sigh of relief, Buffy raced up the stairs, taking the steps two at a time and dashed into her room. She grabbed some clean clothes and made her way to the bathroom, undressing and hopping into the shower. The warm water felt so good on her skin, washing all the sweat from her excursions earlier off and making her feel like a whole new Buffy.

Although the new boyfriend might have had a hand in that.

Buffy grinned remembering everything that had happened with Spike and everything he said to her. Buffy had never felt so wanted by anyone before and felt a thrill at the way he’d repeated how much he loved her. The warm and fuzzies were in full effect at the memory and Buffy wondered how she could have hated someone so…so sweet and loving for so long.

Well there was the whole evil vampire thing and trying to kill me and my friends but I completely ignored the way he’s been changing. It seems so obvious now that he changed towards me, that he wanted me. How could I have been so blind to it all. As far as I was concerned he hated me as much as ever. Wow. Denial much?

As worried as she was about telling people she was now dating another vampire, one without a soul this time, she had no fear of them changing her mind. Of course they’d plant doubt in her brain but what she felt with him last night, the way he made her feel when he was with her. There was no way she was giving him up now. Spike had changed for her and she was going to change for him. Clearly things weren’t black and white in the demon world any more than in the human world. She had been becoming aware of that for a while now but Spike had really opened her eyes.

Rinsing the shampoo from her hair she sighed happily at the refreshing feeling of being all squeaky clean again.

That’s not gonna last long. A certain leather-clad creature of the night’s just waiting until tonight to get me all sweaty and dirty again. And I can’t wait.

She blushed as she recalled the things they’d done, the stuff he’d said, hell the things she’d said. She’d never been very vocal in bed before and hardly ever swore but Spike had brought out the vixen in her, had made her scream. The way he moved above her, muscles flexing, the feeling of having him inside, his dark eyes filled with lust and love. She noticed a familiar wetness spreading between her thighs.

Great. He’s getting me all worked up and he’s not even here. All the way across town in fact. How am I gonna wait until tonight?

***

Dressed casually in a t-shirt and jeans, Buffy found her Mom in the kitchen making some tasty looking sandwiches. Grabbing a carton of juice from the fridge and a couple of glasses, Buffy sat down at the island opposite her mother and gratefully accepted the plate she was offered. Her mouth watered as she eyed her lunch and she realised how ravenous she actually was. She hadn’t eaten since a quick dinner the night before.

“Did I mention how much I love your sandwiches?”

Joyce smiled and poured herself a glass of juice.

“Well since you’ve been out all night I’m not surprised you’re hungry. So did you have a rough night?”

Buffy had practically inhaled half the sandwich when Joyce started speaking and choked on the second half as a whirlwind of images entered her mind at her Mom’s question, reminding her of just how rough a night she’d had. She grabbed her juice and tried desperately to dislodge the piece of her sandwich while her mother observed her worriedly.

“Buffy? Honey are you okay?”

Finally able to breathe again, Buffy nodded.

“I’m fine. I just, um, ate a little too fast I guess. Sorry.”

“Well okay, you really should take your time you know. It doesn’t hurt to chew.”

“But clearly it hurts when you don’t. Yeah patrol went okay, you know, nothing out of the ordinary, not exactly what I’d call rough. Just a typical night for the Chosen One.”

Joyce observed her daughter, took a few bites of her own sandwich, sipped her juice and leaned forward a little on the counter to look Buffy in the eye.

“And may I ask if you saw Spike last night by any chance.”

Keep it together Buffy, she doesn’t know anything, ignore the suspicious look, keep it cool. Tell her the truth and just leave out the R rated stuff.

“Actually yeah. I went by his crypt to ask him a few questions, about his feelings for me, like you said.”

Good show Buffy. God I sound like Giles.

“Uh huh, so what did he say?”

“That he’s stopped wanting me dead since we helped him after he got chipped and that he has a lot of respect for what I do as the Slayer and that he wants to prove he can change. He has been changing actually. I thought about it yesterday when training and he’s been helping a lot when he didn’t have to and when he wasn’t getting anything in return.”

“And that’s it? He wants to help because he respects you?”

Buffy brushed the crumbs off her clothes and prepared herself to tell at least one person the news. She couldn’t keep it from everybody and her Mom had supported her so far.

“He said he loves me.”

Joyce remained perfectly still, staring back at Buffy. Buffy was tempted to wave her hand in front of Joyce’s face to see if the lights were still on when she suddenly sat back with a resigned smile on her face.

“I see. Well I can’t say I’m surprised I guess. So what did you say? Do you think he really…?”

“He loves me Mom. I know what the Watchers drilled into me when I was called but he can love, and he loves me. I decided…I decided to give him a chance.”

“You…Buffy, are you saying that you…that you’re…”

“Dating another vampire? Yeah Mom, I am. Only this vampire is different. He’s not gonna hurt me and he really cares about me, and you and Dawn for that matter.”

Joyce took all this in. She couldn’t help the disappointment showing in her face as she realised her daughter was dating a vampire. Again. She wanted a normal life for her, like any mother, but normal wasn’t in the cards for a Slayer apparently. She looked up and saw her daughter’s pleading eyes looking back at her. No matter how unnerved she was by the thought she knew this was what Buffy wanted. She was desperate for her mother’s support and from the conversation earlier, Joyce knew she was going to have a rough enough time of it when her friends found out. She would be all alone and she’d told Joyce because she wanted someone to be there for her. Clearly Buffy had made her mind up and even though she wasn’t thrilled about it, her daughter’s happiness came first. Besides Spike wasn’t such a bad guy. There were worse choices and if Buffy was willing to give him a chance then Joyce would too.

“Well honey. If he’s what you really want…”

“He is Mom, he really is.”

“And you’re sure…”

“Positive. He makes me feel so…Mom I can’t explain it but I know he’s good for me and I want him, I do. Thank you for understanding, I really hoped you’d take it well. I needed to tell someone, have someone to confide in. It means so much to me that you accept my decision.”

Buffy got up and raced around the Island to hug her mother, relief washing over her that she’d made the right decision confiding in her.

“Oooph, honey, Slayer strength dear. Don’t break you’re Mom.”

Buffy let go quickly, stepping back.

“Oh sorry! Really, really sorry! I didn’t mean to, just…”

“That’s okay sweetie, I understand. So I take it you haven’t told anyone else yet?”

“Not yet. And I don’t intend to for now either. Like I told Spike, there’s too much happening right now, especially with the Council. I need everyone to get along when they’re here and that won’t happen if they find out I’m seeing Spike. Please don’t say anything. I promise I’ll tell them when the time is right, just, not now.”

“I have no intention of saying anything to anyone, that’s up to you. As long as you tell them and don’t try to hide it it’s fine with me. I can certainly see why you don’t want the Watchers to know and I agree with you there. Just remember, your friends will be hurt the longer you keep it from them so as soon as the Council’s gone, I think you should tell them.”

“I know, and I will. Wow, this went really well. I’m one happy Buffy right now. Dawn went to school okay?”

“Yes she’s fine. Buffy…”

Buffy cocked her head and looked at her Mom. She seemed awfully fidgety all of a sudden.

“What is it?”

Joyce couldn’t seem to look Buffy in the eye, opening her mouth to speak and then suddenly closing it again, reconsidering.

“You were out a really long time…were you…with Spike the whole night?”

Joyce glanced at her daughter and the look on her face told her more than she needed to know. She looked away quickly again and cut her off before Buffy could answer.

“No. No, no. It’s fine, forget I asked, I don’t want to know. Hey look at that, my show’s starting soon. Don’t want to miss anything. You want to join me or have you got other things to do?”

Buffy was well aware Joyce was avoiding any further conversation which was a relief because she so did not want to discuss that with her mother.

“No thanks Mom, I should probably go see the others. You know, find out if the Council are here yet or not and what we’re gonna do about this evaluation thingy.”

Joyce paused on her way to the living room.

“Evaluation?”

Buffy shrugged and did her best not to look too bothered by it.

“Some test thingy they want to do to see if I’m Slayer enough to earn whatever info they’ve got on Glory. No biggie really.”

Joyce frowned, whatever show she’d been so desperate not to miss a minute ago forgotten.

“I remember the last test they did to see if you were Slayer enough. Buffy I don’t think…”

“No Mom, really, it’s…it’s fine. Look Giles doesn’t think they’d risk trying anything like that again and I agree with him…I do. It’s just some way for them to feel like they’re the ones in charge. There’s nothing to worry about, and I’ll definitely be finding out what this test involves before I agree to it. I know what they’re capable of just like they know I won’t stand for any more ridiculous challenges to prove my worth.”

Just who am I trying to convince here?

Joyce didn’t look very reassured but she would listen to her daughter and just keep an eye on these Watchers when they got here.

“Alright Buffy, but if they try anything…”

“Don’t worry. It wouldn’t be good for their health. And I’m not the only one who’d have a problem with them if they did try any funny stuff.”

Seemingly convinced, Joyce nodded and headed for the living room. Buffy grabbed her coat and was putting it on when her Mom’s voice drifted into the hall.

“Buffy?”

“Yeah Mom?”

“Are you…coming home tonight…or?”

Buffy blushed. Yep, her Mom was no fool alright.

“Um, I, well…I’ll be back before dinner, to see Dawn, then I should patrol…and um, I should probably drop in on Spike to…you know…see how he is, so…I’m not sure when I’ll be back, probably late. Bye Mom.”

Buffy flew out the door before Joyce could answer. Bad enough she’d promised to come back for dinner before heading to Spike’s place without having another awkward talk with her Mom, but she really did need to see her sister and spend some quality time at home.

***

Giles and Anya were the only ones present when she entered the shop.

“Hey guys. Council?”

Giles gave her a welcoming and understanding smile.

“Arriving later this evening. They want to get themselves organised at the hotel before meeting with us so it will be late. You’ll probably have to skip patrol."

What? Okay don’t worry, you’ll just miss patrol. Doesn’t mean you can’t see Spike afterwards, you told him you’d be late.

But what if he comes here looking for me?

No. He won’t. I told him I’d be late. He can wait.

What am I thinking? It’s Spike! Of course he can’t wait. Stupid Council. They’re not even here yet and they’re already messing things up.

“Some test of my Slayerness, making me miss patrol. Demons of the world, run, frolic, have fun feasting on the residents of Sunnydale, the Slayer’s got an exam.”

“Extreme sarcasm aside, I agree they could have picked a better time but it can’t be helped. I know you don’t like it but it will be worth the trouble for information. Right now we know nothing of use.”

Buffy grumbled and stomped over to a nearby chair at their table and plopped herself down in it.

“Yeah, yeah. Play nice Buffy. Don’t piss off the stuffy English guys who almost got you killed once and won’t give up the goods if you don’t do what you’re told.”

Anya paused where she was restocking the shelves and looked at Buffy, then over to Giles. He glanced back at her before walking closer to Buffy and sitting down next to her.

“Is everything alright? It’s just you seem rather…um…”

Buffy glanced up at her flustered watcher and smirked in amusement.

“More petulant than usual?” she enquired.

“What? No! Of course not…well…no, just..” he stammered, removing his glasses for a thorough cleaning.

Buffy continued to watch him as he polished his glasses and placed them back on his nose. He caught her amused look and relaxed at last.

“Yes, very funny. I’m just not quite used to that much sarcasm coming from you this early in the day, as strange as that sounds, and the others told me about the troll incident.”

Buffy smiled sheepishly.

“Oh, yeah, that. I just was really stressed and the arguing was getting to me and yeah, I guess I lost it a little bit, but I just needed a good fight to get it out of my system and luckily there was a troll around, so, you know, no harm done. It was all okay in the end.”

“Yes well, I know you’re annoyed with this whole arrangement but it would be better all around if you, perhaps, played nice, as you put it, at least while they’re here. Comments like those will most likely not be in our favour.”

Buffy felt like a little kid being scolded.

“Relax Giles. I know better than to run my mouth off to the Watchers. I’m not stupid, I just reckon I should vent as much as possible before they get here. Throw in the fact I’m gonna miss patrol and yeah, you got an irritated Slayer, but I’ll deal with it, don’t worry. I’ll be nice, well-behaved Buffy when they get here.”

“I shall look forward to meeting her.”

“Hey.”

Giles stood, sharing a light-hearted smile with her before heading back to the register to check order forms or some other important paperwork. Buffy sighed loudly.

Well. Might as well get some training in while I’m here. If I’m not going patrolling I’ll need to work off the frustration one way or another.

Immediately Spike’s face popped into her head, along with certain other ways she could be working out her frustration. She hopped up off her seat and made her way purposefully towards the training room before anyone could notice her flushed face.

Stupid sexy vampire.

***

Buffy was dreading walking in the door for dinner. The awkwardness of this morning’s chat with her Mom replaying in her head. Her one consolation was that Dawn would be there, so her Mom couldn’t bring up the subject of Spike in front of her.

Right. I just gotta avoid any alone time with Mom while I’m here, then it’s back to the Magic Box for the meeting with Travers and his buddies. Joy.

She barely made it in the door before the teen who would protect her from her Mom’s inquisition appeared behind her, staring her down with narrowed eyes.

“What?” Buffy asked nervously.

“Where were you all night last night?”

“What? Out. Patrolling. Doing the Slayer thing. Why?”

Buffy leaned back as her younger sister loomed over her, suspicion evident all over her face.

“Funny. Mom said the same thing but when I was cleaning my room, I found those clothes you told her got covered in demon sludge in the laundry basket and they didn’t look like they’d been rinsed to me.”

“Oh my God you cleaned your room?”

Dawn huffed and rolled her eyes.

“I was ordered to before, and I quote, “stuff starts growing in there”. Now about those clothes?”

“Who are you, Harriet the spy? So they weren’t as messed up as I said, I just didn’t want the third degree for being out all night before I had a chance to clean up and get refreshed.”

“Know what I think?”

Buffy did her best not to look as worried as she felt.

“What?”

“I think you ditched patrolling all together and went back to the dorm with Willow and Tara for some wild frat party with a load of drunk guys and made up that lame excuse when you got caught sneaking in this morning after making Mom worry.”

Buffy almost breathed a sigh of relief but knew that wouldn’t look good to Dawn. Her sister wasn’t Sherlock Holmes. Still, might as well run with it right?

“Yes. You caught me. I was at a wild party involving lots of alcohol and college guys. I should have called but I forgot and I made up the excuse because I was guilty. Please don’t tell Mom.”

Dawn relaxed and smirked at her sister, arms folded.

“Sure, don’t worry about it sis. I’ll cover you, this time, but try remember to call ahead in future. You really should be more responsible you know.”

Looking extremely pleased with herself, Dawn sauntered off towards the dining room and Buffy raised her eyes to heaven. A snooping sister was definitely something she could do without right now. Shaking her head, Buffy headed in to dinner. Only a little time remained before the big meeting and she wanted to enjoy it as much as she could.

Chapter 12

Breathe Buffy breathe. Okay, you can do this. It’s just a bunch of uptight British guys in tweed suits. Nothing you can’t handle. I live on a Hellmouth, a couple of glorified librarian’s are nothing to worry about.

Shrugging off her anxiety and putting on her best, do not piss me off or you’ll be sorry, expression, Buffy entered the front door of the Magic Box. The little bell chimed merrily when she came in, however the group that faced her all bore similarly grave expressions.

Buffy counted four men and one woman standing around the shop, all facing her, although it appeared that they had been examining the shop’s merchandise. Anya’s peeved expression and various items she was clutching in her hands suggested the ex vengeance demon had had a few altercations with the Council members over what was being sold in the shop.

“Ah Miss Summers. So glad you could join us at last.”

Buffy turned her attention to the shelves Quentin Travers and Giles had been standing behind. Giles was looking less than pleased and it was clear the men had had words before she arrived. She ran her gaze over the head of the Watchers Council and disliked everything about the man and his predictably tweed outfit.

“Glad you could find the time to meet us at last. I hear you have some useful information for me.”

Sure she’d promised to be nice but there was no reason to put up with his obvious contempt for her when she could just cut to the chase now, was there?

Travers gave her a knowing smile that didn’t reach his eyes. He strode across the room to stand across from Buffy, the other Watchers standing around like sentries, looking down their noses at her.

“Indeed. However, I’m sure Mr. Giles mentioned the evaluation we intend to run before providing you with such valuable information. We can’t have it falling into the wrong hands after all.”

Faint grumbling could be heard and Buffy spotted her friends gathered around the table near the back. Judging from the shove Willow gave him in the arm, Xander had been the one complaining. Buffy nodded at them in acknowledgment before facing Travers again.

“I see. So the Slayer, Chosen One and all, might be the wrong hands? Excuse me if I’m a little confused, I just thought my title as a Champion for the World would be enough to prove me worthy of information that could prevent yet another apocalypse.”

“Normally that would of course be the case but since the incident with Faith we’ve learned to be very careful about who we confide in. Even if they are the ones meant for the job.”

Buffy smiled wryly to herself, crossing her arms and quirking an eyebrow at him.

“Oh right, of course. How silly of me. Naturally after one of your Slayer’s decided to switch sides and turn evil, you’d want to tighten the leash. Then again, as one of the longest living Slayer’s who stopped Faith you might reconsider and share. After all, we all want to stop Glory right? It would be a shame for the world to end after all.”

“And as one of the longest lived Slayer’s you should have no difficulty passing. Relax Miss Summers. I’m well aware of your mistrust of us since the cruciamentum. We’re not asking you to risk your life this time.”

“You’re not? Oh goody. That makes a change.”

Giles shot her a warning glare but she ignored it. If they weren’t testing her through violence they clearly had some other crafty plan in mind to catch her out. She was no fool. They were definitely up to something, keeping their cards close to their chest.

“All we’re asking is that you allow us to observe you and your allies for a short period of time to discover how you run things here. Since you broke contact with the Council we’ve been rather curious as to how you’ve fought your battles. You reign victorious over all your enemies so far and we want to see what sort of strategy is involved. A Slayer has never had quite so many…companions before. We’d like to see how your team functions, on and off the field.”

Buffy frowned. Observation? They wanted to see how she ran things when she wasn’t under their thumb huh?

“So basically you, what, follow me and my friends around taking notes and at the end if your curiosity’s been satisfied and you accept that I’ve been doing a good job you’ll let me in on the info you have on Glory?”

“Precisely. We will of course need to assess your physical abilities in the field and your training routine, however, it will be by observation only as you patrol, no secret tests sapping your strength.”

He appeared to be telling the truth. Giles and the others were watching her, waiting for her answer. They were going to be under observation too but Buffy knew they’d do whatever it took to help so it was up to her to decide if she wanted to agree to it.

“Out of curiosity, say I refused the evaluation, what happens then?”

“Well then you’ll have wasted everybody here’s time, we would have Mr. Giles deported, seen as we’ve been so lenient in allowing him to continue teaching you, despite quitting his position as your Watcher and we would have to insist that a new Watcher be assigned to you to train you properly. You are the Chosen One after all, you have to fulfil your duties as the Slayer.”

She knew it. She knew they had some nasty back up plan to make sure she did what they wanted.

“And if I fail? Same consequences right?”

Travers smiled. Naturally he was enjoying this. He hadn’t liked being slighted one bit when she and Giles had turned their backs on him and now he was getting his revenge.

“Now your getting it.”

Giles’ face was a picture of outrage. He stepped up to Travers and attempted to stare the man down.

“Hang on! You can’t…”

“I think you’ll find I can Rupert. Now I suggest you back down and let Miss Summers make her decision. I’m sure you’ve trained her well. There’s no way she could fail right?”

Buffy stepped in before Giles could respond. There was no use fighting them. She was up to their challenge. She’d just have to do her best to impress them and behave accordingly, no matter how much it irked her.

“It’s okay Giles. I won’t fail. It sounds like a perfectly reasonable request Mr. Travers. I accept.”

“Of course you do. Very well then. It’s getting quite late and we‘ve had a rather long flight. I suggest we all go get some rest and start the evaluation tomorrow, agreed? Unless you were planning on patrolling. In which case I can have some of my team accompany you.”

“No I don’t think so. As you said it’s late and there hasn’t been much action lately since Glory arrived. I think I’ll go home and check on my Mom and sister. You do look rather tired. You should all go get a good night’s sleep so you’re not suffering from jet lag when you’re following all of us around tomorrow.”

Travers nodded and turned to his team. Like the good, respectable puppets they were, they moved to the exit as a unit, clipboards in hand. Travers bade them a final goodnight before joining his team outside. They left all the tension they’d generated in the room behind, however.

Breathing a sigh of relief, Buffy’s shoulders slumped and she glanced over to her friends. They were all pretty uncomfortable looking and Giles was being especially quiet, polishing his glasses, obviously disturbed at the news that he would possibly be deported. Anya was busy returning all the items she’d saved from the Watchers back on the shelves. She was also being unusually quiet, which was especially unnerving. Their lives were going to be under the scrutiny of the Council for the next few days and nobody was looking forward to that. Least of all Buffy. If they were going to follow her everywhere it would make seeing Spike a hell of a lot more difficult. And that wasn’t going to sit well with her or him.

“You guys ready for this?”

“I’m not sure anyone can be ready to have their lives put under a microscope but sure, we know you have to do this, we all heard what the consequences will be otherwise.”

“Thanks Xand. God these next few days are going to be hell. Sometimes I really hate being the Slayer.”

Giles came over to pat her on the shoulder.

“It is a large burden to bear but you’ve managed very well over the years. I know it’s difficult but we will see this through.”

She smiled up at her ex Watcher and placed her hand over his. He really was like a father to her.

“Thanks Giles.”

Willow perked up a bit, trying to bring the group back to a more cheerful mood.

“He’s right, and you won’t have to do this alone. It involves all of us. We’re all going to do what we can to make sure you pass.”

Heads bobbed in agreement and Buffy was grateful to have such good friends. She wouldn’t have made it this far without them. They were a great team. The Council had to see that.

“I know guys. Thank you so much for doing this. Really, I know it’s not easy.”

“Well it isn’t like we’ve got much choice. They’re not letting us refuse.”

Anya, always truthful, to a fault. But it was a relief to hear her speaking again, even if it wasn’t the best thing she could have said. Being quiet for so long was just weird, no matter how often they might have wished for it in the past.

“Yes, well, I suggest we go home and get some sleep before dealing with them. It wouldn’t do to be exhausted when we have to answer their questions. Would you like a lift home Buffy? You could definitely use the rest knowing what they’ll have in store for you tomorrow.”

For a moment Buffy was torn between accepting or refusing the offer. A lift sounded really good right now. She sighed to herself, knowing there was no way she could accept. She might be exhausted but there was no way she could go home without visiting Spike first. He’d be getting really impatient and worried if she didn’t show up soon and it wasn’t like she could call and cancel their plans. Besides, he might be able to cheer her up, even if she didn’t feel up to the wild night she’d initially had in mind. The tweedy invasion had sapped all the enthusiasm and energy right out of her.

“Thanks Giles but I think I’ll walk. I could use the time to think and the fresh night air will do me some good. Plus it just means I’ll be extra sleepy when I get home.”

“Okay, if you’re sure. Right then, until tomorrow.”

The gang said their goodbye’s and went their separate ways. Buffy wrapped her coat around herself as she stepped out into the chilly night air, and, out of sight of the Magic Box, turned towards Restfield Cemetary and her lover.

***

Spike was pacing up and down his crypt, fully clothed, including his duster and about ready to climb the walls. He’d been replaying the previous night and this morning over and over in his head all day and had worked himself up into a right state. He’d been waiting for the sun to go down, watching telly, touching up the black varnish on his nails, doing anything he could think of to keep himself occupied.

Eventually the sun had set but it did little to ease his nerves or his boredom. He still had to wait for her to finish meeting with the Council of Wankers before she could come see him. Desperate to go out and do something, he’d gone and bought blood and smokes, as well as a few snack foods he liked. That had taken all of a few minutes and he’d left again almost immediately for a quick patrol. Buffy was busy and he could definitely do with killing something. A spot of violence was just what he needed to pass the time and work out his frustrations. Unfortunately it was a slow night but he managed to find three fledgling vamps who clearly couldn’t sense power when it was right in front of them. He took his time, toying with them, for no other reason than to keep himself mildly entertained for a while. He grew tired of the pitiful fight pretty fast though and soon they were no more than dust.

So he’d returned to his crypt where he was trying desperately to stay put and wait for Buffy.

I am going to wait here for her like she said. She’s going to come here. I am going to stay right here and be patient. I am not going to go off and look for her when she’s meeting those tossers. I am not, I am not, I am…oh bloody hell!

In a whirl of black leather he stormed over to the door, flung it open and headed out into the night. He didn’t get very far, just outside the cemetery gates in fact, when he found her.

She was on her way to see him and stopped when she looked up and spotted him in front of her, looking rather sheepish that he’d been caught leaving on his way to look for her.

“I should have known you wouldn’t have the patience to wait very long.”

“Think I did a decent job of waitin’ actually. Only just left didn’ I? An’ you’ve been gone bloody long enough. It is really late y’know.”

She sighed and looked up at the sky. He could see how tense and tired she was.

“I know. I’m sorry. They decided to wait until they were all comfy in their hotel before they’d meet me. Had to skip patrol and everything. Only just got away, came straight here if it helps.”

He smiled softly at her and stepped closer, until they were face to face.

“It helps luv. So how’d it go? You know what this visit o’ theirs is all about now?”

She leaned into him and he wrapped his arms around her, embracing her in a tight hug. She took a deep breath, inhaling his comfortable scent and raised her arms to hug him back, stroking the soft leather of his coat.

“Yeah. They want to look over my shoulder for a while. Make sure I’m doing things properly. Oh and the Scoobies. They want to see how this team thing I’ve got going for me works. It’s all just curiosity apparently. If they think I’m doing a good job they’ll dish the dirt on Glory. Of course if I refused or fail they’ll withhold the info, provide me with a new Watcher and have Giles deported.”

Spike growled and held her closer. No wonder she was so worn out. This invasion of privacy wouldn’t be easy on her. Now she had to worry ‘ol Rupes would get deported as well.

“Wankers. Got nothin’ better to do with their time than to screw up someone else’s life. Don’ worry luv. You’re the toughest Slayer I know an’ I reckon I’m a pretty good judge don’ you?”

She smiled and lifted her head up to look at him.

“That really shouldn’t cheer me up as much as it does.”

He grinned back at her and rubbed her back soothingly, just like he had the first night he’d held her.

“Who cares as long as it does the trick. You look pretty beat pet.”

“Gee thanks. That’s what every girl wants to hear.”

“C’mon Buffy. You know I’d find you gorgeous no matter what. I’m worried ‘bout you. I can’t believe I’m sayin’ this but…maybe I should take you home, let you get some rest. You have a lot to deal with tomorrow an’ I don’ want you collapsin’ from exhaustion. Wouldn’ look good in front o’ those gits.”

The way she was staring at him was making him very uncomfortable.

“What?”

“That…is so…sweet.”

Thank God he couldn’t blush. The smile she was giving him made him feel like a schoolboy who’s crush had actually spoken to him.

Not much difference really when you think ‘bout it.

“Bloody hell woman. First I’m cute and now I’m sweet. Evil vampire remember? Ring any bells? Those words shouldn’t even be in the same sentence as me.”

She reached up to ruffle his hair affectionately, giggling at his attempt to look annoyed.

“Yeah because a really evil vampire would offer to walk me home so I could get some sleep instead of whisking me off to his crypt to do unspeakable things with me.”

He bent his head until their foreheads were touching and gave her a wide grin, massaging her back and pulling her closer.

“Careful. Might give me ideas. Chivalry only lasts so long with me. I’m doin’ my best to be considerate here. Course, I could always do as you suggested and carry you back to my bed if you wanted.”

She sighed happily, staring up into his eyes, running her fingers through his hair, which, apparently, had become one of her favourite things to do.

“Boy do I want to. But you’re right. It really would be best for me to go home and take it easy. Think I’m gonna have to accept the chivalrous route while it’s offered.”

He sighed loudly and slumped his shoulders.

“Sod it. Knew bein’ good was no fun.”

She could tell he wasn’t being serious. He cared about her too much. It was so unexpected of him, but she was learning there was a lot more to Spike than she’d ever thought possible, and she intended to find out as much about him as she could.

“Not always. But it earns you major brownie points in the boyfriend department.”

He cheered up instantly at the word boyfriend.

“Well then. Can’t rightly complain can I?”

“Nuh uh.”

She pulled him down for a kiss, soft and tender. It lasted a long time, their lips moving rhythmically against one another. It was unlike their previous, passionate kisses but it sent shivers running down their spines when they eventually broke apart.

“Mmm, I could definitely get used to this,” Buffy commented.

“Good. Next time I get you all to myself there will be plenty of kissing involved, among other things.”

“Here’s hoping the stupid Council’s visit won’t get in the way too much then. I definitely want more kissing, and other things.”

“Unless you want to test the limits of my considerate side I suggest we head towards yours before I’m forced to haul you into my crypt right now.”

“Yeah, I can see how that would be best. Darn my sensibleness. But it really is for the best.”

Pulling away she reached for his hand and clasped it, turning around so they could walk side by side to her house.

It had been a long time since Spike had held someone’s hand walking down the street. Not since he and Dru had been together, happily, before the whole mess with Angelus had gotten in the way. But he’d never had that tingling sensation he did now holding Buffy’s hand. The warm and fuzzies were in full effect.

They spent some time just walking together in companionable silence. It felt really nice, being so close with each other. When Buffy spoke, it was more out of a desire to share her thoughts with him than to break the silence.

“I really shouldn’t be this worn out. I didn’t even patrol, somebody better not die tonight because something’s out there I should have killed.”

“Well you prob’ly wore yourself out this mornin’ or need I remind you what exactly you were up to then?”

She blushed and lowered her head which he found absolutely adorable and he smirked.

“Good. I’d hate to think you’d have forgotten that. I wouldn’ worry ‘bout any nasties bein’ on the prowl. Did a quick sweep earlier an’ it was pretty much dead ‘cept these three vamps. Newbies that went down easy. Sunnydale’s safe for the night I reckon.”

She looked up at him intrigued.

“You went on patrol?”

“Had to keep busy somehow. I don’ have much patience an’ I was drivin’ myself nuts waitin’ for you.”

She smiled but kept any comments about how cute the thought of him waiting for her was to herself. She imagined what a bored Spike would be like and decided it was probably best not to keep him waiting too long in the future. It would be much easier if she had some way to contact him.

“You need a phone.”

He turned his head to look at her.

“Come again?”

“A phone, so I can reach you. There might be times when I can’t come see you or when I might need you’re help or something. It would be much easier if you had a phone, then we could at least talk to each other if we couldn’t meet up.”

He was surprised and pleased that she’d want some way to stay in touch with him. It made sense really. He just never thought Buffy would want him around. Of course that had changed last night but he was still getting used to the fact that she wanted him. He’d spent so long dreaming about it, thinking it was hopeless that it was all sort of surreal.

“Right. Guess I’ll have to get one then. Make talkin’ to you durin’ the day much easier.”

“Yeah, without the danger of burning up in the sun, although it would still be nice if you popped by now and again the way you do, in the daylight. It would be a nice surprise.”

“You’re not gettin’ rid o’ me that easy Summers. Don’ worry, I can’t resist seein’ you in the daylight, sunshine reflectin’ off that golden hair. You glow.”

She bumped his shoulder with her own and squeezed his hand. He gave her a grin in return. All too soon they reached her house.

“Well, here we are.”

“Yeah, made it home safe an’ sound. Guess you better head in ‘fore your mum comes lookin’ for you an’ finds me out here holdin’ you hostage. Don’ fancy havin’ an axe swung at my head.”

“Yeah right. You and Mom get along just fine if I remember correctly, and anyway she probably wouldn’t be all that surprised to see you.”

He tilted his head, curious.

“Oh yeah? How’s that then?”

Buffy trailed a finger up and down his shirt, her other hand still holding his tightly.

“I had to tell someone about us. Mom liked you so I figured she’d be the right person to tell. I was driving myself crazy trying to figure out what to do after you said you had feelings for me and she gave me good advice, she suspected I’d go see you so I told her that you loved me and that I’d decided to give you a chance.”

His face was a picture of adoration and wonderment.

“She knows? You told your mum ‘bout us?”

“Everything but the sexcapades, yeah.”

He used his free hand to pull her closer for another of those special, loving kisses.

“Did I mention how much I love you?”

“You might have,” she grinned, “maybe not in the last few hours…”

“Right, let me make up for it. I love you. I love you, I love you, I love you.”

The sincerity in his voice made Buffy’s heart swell with emotion. Whatever she was currently feeling for him, it was getting stronger.

“Spike…”

He caressed her cheek and kissed her again, this time running his tongue along her bottom lip and giving it a quick nibble. She parted her lips and he slipped inside, exploring her mouth and tangling his tongue with her own. It was growing more desperate when he finally pulled away and she whimpered.

“Sorry luv. Didn’ mean for that to get so intense, you need your rest an’ all. Best get you tucked up in your beddie-bye before I end up ravishing you here on the front lawn.”

Buffy was having a hard time convincing herself that Spike ravishing her anywhere would be a bad idea but eventually decided he was probably right. She couldn’t imagine how she was going to get to sleep now when all she wanted was to curl up in bed with him.

“I suppose. One more for the road?”

He smiled and moved in for another kiss, keeping it short and sweet this time. He knew he wouldn’t be able to resist the temptation otherwise.

They said their goodbye’s and Buffy went inside. Her Mom and Dawn were already in bed, she’d told them not to wait up. She hauled herself upstairs and got ready for bed, crawling into the covers. She tossed about for a while thinking of Spike and missing his arms around her. Just then a familiar tingle ran through her and she grinned. Finally settling in with the comforting presence around her she drifted off to sleep.

Outside a trail of smoke rose up from under the tree by her window. A few minutes later, he was gone, leaving a peacefully dreaming Slayer behind.

Chapter 13

“These are very basic commands Miss Summers. Do you mean to say you don’t even know what they mean?”

Buffy huffed and rubbed at what was sure to become a bruise on her arm where the pathetic little weasel of a watcher Travers had ordered to spar with her had landed a blow with the staff he was using as a weapon. Said weasel was now grinning pompously at her, feeling highly important that he had the upper hand in their training session.

“Well gee, I guess I missed the part where I was supposed to learn Chinese as a crucial part of my training. Can’t you just speak in English? It hardly makes sense for me to know another language and, by the way, exactly when do you expect me to have someone shouting orders at me over my shoulder while I fight?”

“This is a typical part of every young Slayer’s training. Mr. Giles I am surprised you failed to teach her this when you first began training her.”

Giles was leaning against the vaulting horse with his arms crossed and lips pursed, observing his Slayer and calling out what Travers wanted her to do in English when he could. Unfortunately it didn’t give her enough time to carry out the order before her opponent made his move. Now he looked at Travers trying very hard to keep certain unpleasant comments to himself. Buffy was headstrong from the start and it often took him a while to convince her of the importance of many of the training exercises she was expected to do. To be honest, when he thought about it they did seem rather pointless.

“I was doing my best to teach her what she needed to know to stay alive, the prophecy with the Master being a priority, and as she pointed out, commands in Chinese when she doesn’t speak the language is hardly helpful even if it is tradition. Buffy is more than capable of taking care of herself and having someone tell her what to do is hardly necessary anymore. That was something she needed when she was first called, not now.”

Buffy threw a grin in her ex-Watcher’s direction, pleased to have his support now. Her no nonsense approach to Travers seemed to be rubbing off on him, even though they both knew they had to be civil and play ball unless Giles wanted to find himself on the next plane back to merry old England.

Travers was not so happy at Giles’ response but brushed it off. Pacing back and forth with his hands clasped behind his back, he pondered his next task for the Slayer. They had spent the last hour in the training room going through all the basic tests a Slayer was put through as she was trained. So far Buffy wasn’t doing so well but mostly because she had no idea what they expected of her or how any of the exercises were supposed to help her in the field. If she didn’t see the point in something it was very difficult for her to get enthusiastic and do her best at it.

“I see. I was going to suggest we test your capabilities at protecting a victim while under attack but the other members of my team should be arriving along with your…friends. I would like to compare their notes.”

“Great, I can’t wait.”

That morning Buffy had opened the door to find two of Travers’ team she didn’t recognise standing there, clipboards at the ready. As it turned out, they were there to speak to Joyce and Dawn about Buffy’s role as a Slayer and the situations they had found themselves in over the years since she was called. Buffy was more than annoyed when she found out that the observation they’d been talking about included her family but she had no choice than to accept it and leave them to it while she went to meet Travers who was going to study her himself. Her friends had probably woken up to the same unwelcome surprise. The team he had assembled included more than who he had brought with him to the shop yesterday. Those five were in charge of their own small team and led the investigation on her friends.

“We will of course be keeping our assessment until the end when we have gathered enough sufficient information before sharing the result with you so don’t expect any feedback just yet. We still have more we want to look into and have yet to observe you on patrol.”

“Of course you do. It couldn’t be over this quickly could it? Don’t worry, I wasn’t expecting an answer yet.”

They all moved to the shop where Anya was doing her best to keep up a charming and pleasant demeanor in front of her customers while a Watcher hovered behind her constantly scribbling little notes every so often. The only sign of her annoyance was the occasional twitch of her eye or mouth, usually when he got in her way as she rushed about in her usual hard-working manner.

It was like having an extremely irritating gnat or mosquito buzzing around you that you couldn’t get rid of and Buffy was struggling not to wipe the self-satisfied smirk off the weasel from the training room’s face while he followed Travers around like a desperate to please puppy.

A few minutes after they entered, Willow and Tara came in, followed of course, by their own personal Watchers. Both were looking rather weary and peeved from their new companions but gave Giles and Buffy understanding smiles of greeting. Xander arrived shortly after and they all watched as Travers and his team members assembled in a far corner to discuss what they had found out. One of the exclusive group from yesterday was missing, Buffy noticed. The woman had yet to arrive with her underlings and Buffy wondered who they could have been questioning. The people talking to her Mom and Dawn had come back earlier in the day so Buffy was at rather a loss to figure it out.

***

The day had dragged by but luckily was coming to an end. Of course Buffy would need to go on patrol with an entourage before she could go home to bed but hopefully seeing her fight under her own terms would make up for the disastrous training session as well as letting her work off some steam with violence.

They were closing up the shop when the woman from the Watchers Council arrived with her crew and headed straight over to Travers, completely ignoring Buffy and the Scoobies. After several minutes, glancing over at the huddled group in the corner speaking in hushed tones, Buffy was getting twitchy.

Clearing her throat loudly she stood and faced Travers who glanced over at her, irritation flashing across his features.

“Yes Miss Summers?”

“If you don’t mind, I’d like to head out on patrol now. It’s already dark out and I’d hate to keep all of you up any later than necessary simply because you had to watch me kill demons all night. Perhaps you could postpone this little discussion for another time?”

It was desperately hard for her not to fold her arms and roll her eyes. They were being as inconvenient as possible and she really wanted to just do a quick sweep tonight and get rid of them so she could at last get some peace and relax.

“Very well. I suppose it is getting rather late, and I am rather eager to see how you handle things in the field. Mr. Giles, will you also be accompanying us?”

Giles simply nodded. A large group would make finding anything to slay difficult but there was no way Buffy was dealing with the Council by herself. She might decide to slay one or all of them instead. Giles wasn’t going to leave her alone to contend with Quentin and his entourage. If anything he would be there to lend her the moral support she would no doubt need.

Travers didn’t seem the least bit surprised that Giles would be joining them. Instead of putting up an argument he merely turned to his team and whispered some orders to them. Eventually, the majority of the tweed clad Brits left, leaving Travers, the woman and two other men from his exclusive group who had accompanied him for their first meeting behind.

Man doesn’t travel light does he? Instead of weapons or equipment he brings his loyal little bookworms around to help him feel important.

Relieved that they would finally be on the move, Buffy said goodbye to the rest of the Scoobies who were all looking eager to leave and escape the scrutiny of the Council for some much needed alone time at home.

***

It was decided that they would give Buffy a good head start and keep their distance so as not to alert her quarry of an unusually large number of humans present while she did her duty. Once she had engaged whatever demon happened along in battle they could get closer and watch as she fought to suss out her skills.

So far things had been quiet. She’d checked out the area around the Bronze and various warehouses she knew vamps liked to hang out and was scoping out a few cemeteries, keeping far away from Restfield. She really didn’t need to be explaining Spike to the Council. As luck would have it she was midway through her third cemetery of the evening before anything attacked her. Finally she could show off and hopefully earn some points on this evaluation and send Travers and his crew packing for the night.

Five vamps circled her thinking they’d happened along some helpless girl wandering alone in a cemetery at night and were about to get an easy meal. Buffy stayed perfectly still as they circled her, a little smile playing on her lips. She loved surprising them. Letting them show off and pretending to be scared and helpless was worth the look on their face seconds before they were dust blowing in the wind. The leader stepped up to her, grinning madly, his fangs glistening in the moonlight.

“What have we got here? Didn’t anyone ever tell you not to wander around alone in places like this at night? Lots of nasty things could happen to you. Lots of scary monsters about.”

“Really? Where?” Buffy turned her head left and right as though searching for the scary monsters he’d mentioned.

The vamps shared looks of surprise and confusion when she didn’t scream or try to run off. The leader was clearly thrown that his prey didn’t seem the least bit bothered by him and his flunkies.

“Nice try little girl. You shouldn’t hide it, I know you’re scared, acting tough won’t get you out of this mess. Me and my friends are hungry, been a while since we had anything fresh and young to eat. Nope, no getting out of this, even if you beg, although it will be more fun that way.”

He grinned again but Buffy never even flinched. Her heartbeat was steady, if anyone was acting tough it was him. Despite the bravado he was clearly unnerved that she wasn’t showing the slightest bit of fear or panic. She could tell from his expression when he realised something was wrong this time.

Cocking her head to the side, she frowned, a puzzled look on her face.

“Why would I need to beg? There’s nothing scary here, just a bunch of vamps. Why would I be afraid of you when I have this?”

She pulled out her stake and twirled it expertly. She grinned when she saw recognition flash in the vamp’s yellow eyes.

“Slayer!”

They were looking a little less confident now, but knowing she was a threat made them defensive and with numbers on their side, they saw no reason to flee. They charged at her and she whirled into action.

Two were dust almost instantly and she dodged the fangs of a third who thought he had her off guard. Recovering quickly she kicked a fourth in the face, sending him sprawling back on the ground, causing the leader to stumble and fall when he tripped over the fallen vamp. Spinning around quickly, she blocked another attack from the vamp that had tried to bite her and grabbed him by the shirt, tossing him over her head and on top of the other two lying on the ground.

The leader grunted and tossed the recently fallen vamp off him and leaped to his feet. Snarling viciously, he charged at her. She swung her stake and he ducked, grabbing her arm and twisting it behind her back. He attempted to drive his fangs into her exposed neck but she threw her head back, hitting him squarely in the face, stunning him long enough to kick another vamp out of the way and reverse their positions, spinning him by his arm until she was behind him. Not wasting another second she sent the stake home and he dusted.

The sight of their leader vanishing into a cloud of ashes caused an attacking vamp to falter and she wasted no time in sending him the same way with a quick stab from her stake, leaving just one left. The remaining vampire assessed the situation, realised he was alone and took off running in the opposite direction. Knowing the Council were watching, Buffy tracked his movements for a moment, aimed and hurled her stake at his back, striking him spot on in the heart. He had enough time to flail his arms and fall to his knees before he vanished.

Satisfied that they were all taken care of, Buffy turned and waited while her observers approached. The two male Watchers were armed with crossbows and kept wary eyes on their surroundings in case of attack. Buffy inwardly scoffed at their nervousness. She’d be able to sense if anything was nearby and doubted that if there was a threat, the weak looking men in front of her would be able to do anything to protect themselves and their boss, armed or not.

“It appears you are very adept when it comes to dealing with vampires, although they did get rather close to your neck a few times.”

Clearly the man was incapable of giving anyone a compliment without criticising them at the same time. Behind his back, Buffy noticed Giles raising his eyes skyward and she fought back a smile.

“I was in no danger. I can handle a few vamps and getting close allows me to hit harder.”

Travis stared the Slayer in the eye. She was full of determination and looked as though she was daring him to find something wrong with her way of Slaying.

“Right then. If that’s all we’re going to find tonight I think it’s about time we…”

He paused mid-sentence, staring over Buffy’s shoulder at the same time her senses kicked in, signalling a demon was close by. The men with the crossbows were aiming them behind her and trying to hold them steady but failing. Whatever it was, it was no simple vampire.

Buffy turned and saw a large demon covered in spines watching the group. It had glowing green eyes and lethal looking yellow teeth and didn’t seem the least bit fazed by being outnumbered. Whatever it was had no trouble taking on a group which meant it was strong and this was going to be a nasty fight.

Just when they were about to leave too.

Squaring off with her new, deadlier enemy, Buffy took in its appearance again. Those spines were going to make it difficult to get close to and hand to hand combat was out. Stakes weren’t going to be much use either.

“Giles, sword please.”

Giles kept his eyes locked on the demon as well while he pulled out the sword and tossed it to Buffy who caught it automatically. She adjusted to the new weight and swung it experimentally once or twice to get accustomed to the feel of it. The Council members and Giles began backing away, leaving her plenty of room to fight and keeping a safe distance between them and the demon.

The creature tracked their movements, hissing occasionally and twitching, preparing to strike at any sudden movement. Buffy slowly stepped forwards, drawing its attention to her while she worked out a strategy in her head.

When she began moving so did the demon, watching her warily. Suddenly it attacked, rushing her and aiming a fist full of spines at her face. She narrowly avoided the attack and swung her sword but the creature spun away before the blade could make contact with its leathery hide.

The fight continued in a blur as the Slayer and demon, struck, parried, kicked and dodged each other. Neither made much damage but had sustained one or two injuries from a few close calls. Rolling out of the way of another brutal punch Buffy found an opening and swung the blade at its stomach. It avoided the killing blow she’d been hoping for but didn’t manage to escape a deep gash in its belly. Yellow ooze she assumed was its blood began pouring from it and it screeched in pain, clutching at the wound.

“Good to know you have a weakness for steel blades.”

Her satisfaction dwindled when her opponent whirled around, snarling and hissing, obviously very pissed off. Hurting it had made it angry and there was no holding back now, it was going all out this time as it lunged at her.

Buffy found herself fighting for her life and grateful to have the sword to put distance between her and her foe. She wasn’t getting any chance to go on the offensive and injure it, she could barely manage to avoid getting hurt herself.

Something would have to be done quickly, she was getting tired and the demon wasn’t letting up. Buffy aimed to swing her sword at its neck after dodging a punch but it was too fast for her and she found herself flat on her back when it kicked her legs out from under her. She’d dropped her sword, she realised, but had no time to act before the creature was on her.

She gasped in pain as sharp spines dug into her shoulders and tried desperately to move her legs to kick it off her but its weight had her pinned. Just when the thought that she was in serious trouble flashed through her mind, the weight suddenly vanished, along with the demon, and she was left lying on the ground stunned.

Coming to her senses, she scrambled to find her weapon, grabbed it and sprang to her feet, wincing at the pain in her shoulders where she had some new puncture marks. She soon realised what, or rather who, had helped her. She watched as Spike, in game face, took on the spiny demon, kicking it and carefully dodging its attacks.

He seemed to be enjoying himself as he taunted the beast, in typical Spike fashion, goading it into attacking him. Fresh to the fight, he outmanoeuvred the tired demon, who was still oozing yellow blood from where Buffy had slashed it.

Buffy admired him for a while as he fought. She always loved fighting him, and now, watching him fight at her side, she saw why they were so equally matched. He was a master at adapting to whatever fighting styles he encountered. No matter what strategy you used against him, he would observe it, take note of how you moved and then turn your own style against you, effectively countering any of your previously successful hits.

As much as she was enjoying the sight of him, coat whirling around him like a cape, she knew he wouldn’t be able to finish it off without a weapon and she had to put an end to the fight. Not to mention the Watchers, behind her, making note of everything they were seeing. Waiting until a kick to the head had dazed it enough, she ran over, sword raised and as soon as Spike saw her and got out of the way, sliced off the creature’s head. Decapitation was a sure way to kill something in her book and this was no different. She watched as the spiny head rolled to a stop by a headstone, green eyes ceasing to glow and leaving a yellow trail of ooze in the grass.

“Well that was excitin’ eh luv?”

Buffy threw a sceptical look in Spike’s direction. That was not her idea of fun. He didn’t have sharp spines punching holes in him.

“Oh don’t tell me that wasn’t fun.”

She grinned, remembering a time when he first returned to Sunnydale after Dru left him in search of a love spell, only to leave after a violent fight cheered him up. He said the same thing then too. She didn’t have time to answer him before the sound of throats being cleared behind her caught her attention.

Spike and Buffy glanced over at Giles, Travers and the others staring at them.

Crap. How am I going to explain this to them?

The guys with the crossbows went to examine the demon. Giles was watching Travers who was staring fixedly at Spike. Buffy noticed the woman also looking at Spike with something suspiciously resembling a shy smile on her face.

“William the Bloody. I didn’t at first believe the rumours that you were in Sunnydale helping the Slayer but now I see it’s true.”

Spike didn’t bother acknowledging Travers, merely choosing to take out a cigarette and his lighter and start smoking.

“Miss Summers. Perhaps you would like to explain? I heard something about a military device being used to prevent him harming anyone but that doesn’t quite explain why he’s decided to help you or why you’re allowing him to?”

“Like you said, he’s harmless to humans now and sometimes it comes in handy, having someone else with super-strength around to fight demons. He fights because he likes it and I let him because it gives him something to do besides annoying me.”

She refused to look at Spike, already catching the raised eyebrow and amused smirk on his face out of the corner of her eye.

“Really? So, you have no problem helping your enemy kill your kind then? That must do some damage to your reputation as Slayer of Slayers,” Travers addressed Spike.

Spike studied the haughty man in front of him, looking him up and down carefully before making his mind up about him.

Wanker.

Catching the eye of the woman standing behind Travers, Spike grinned, deciding if he was going to talk to any of these tossers it would be her.

“Hello again luv. Delicate thing like you should know better than to be out here at night. Don’ suppose you have that thesis o’ yours handy?”

The woman giggled and batted her eyelashes, cheeks flushed.

Buffy gaped, mouth opening and closing like a fish.

Huh? How does he know her? Thesis? What does he think he’s doing calling her “luv” and “delicate”? Oh my God is he flirting with her?

“I’m afraid not. I wasn’t expecting to see you again so soon.”

Spike smiled and nodded, assuming a slightly disappointed look.

“That’s too bad. Guess it will have to wait ‘til next time, yeah?”

Buffy was staring back and forth between Spike and the female Watcher.

Oh my God he is! He’s totally flirting with her! And she’s flirting back!

Buffy looked at Giles and Travers hoping for some clue as to what might be going on here. Giles was looking equally confused, whereas Travers appeared annoyed but not surprised. Deciding there was only one way to get an answer Buffy decided to ask.

“I’m sorry but how exactly do you two know each other? And what’s this about a thesis, why do you want a thesis?”

Spike looked over at Buffy questioningly as if it was the most natural thing in the world for him to be discussing a thesis with a member of the Council. The woman blushed even more before adjusting her glasses and assuming an air of contempt for the increasingly peeved blonde woman in front of her.

“I was the person in charge of questioning Spike about working with you as part of the evaluation today.”

How did they know about him helping me, those rumours? I didn’t know he was going to be part of this evaluation and observation as well.

“You’re talking to Spike about me?”

Travers decided to join in the conversation then.

“We feel it’s best to communicate with all your allies to build a reasonable profile on you. An ally who was recently an enemy seemed like an appropriate counter balance to questioning your friends and family so I sent Lydia here to investigate. Also I wanted to establish whether or not the rumours about him were true, which, evidently, they are.”

Okay that explained how the woman knew Spike, but not why they were flirting with each other.

“Uh huh. And the reason you want a thesis would be…?”

Spike shrugged and finished off his cigarette before tossing the butt to the ground and stamping on it.

“Council girl wrote her thesis on me. Interested in the Big Bad here. Can’t say I blame her, jus’ interested to see what she wrote ‘bout me.”

He winked at Lydia causing her to go all star-struck, blushing and giggling again.

Oh great. Spike’s got a fan girl.

Buffy felt something bubbling up inside her as she watched Spike and Lydia throwing flirtatious looks in each other’s direction. She didn’t like the feeling one bit and decided it was high time they all got the hell out of this cemetery and went home for the night.

“Right, well I don’t think there’s any need for us to stick around here any longer, do you, why don’t we call it a night?”

Travers nodded in agreement and signalled to his troupe to gather their things. Giles packed up the bag of weapons they had brought before heading off to the car. Buffy noticed with some irritation that Lydia was too busy batting her eyelashes at Spike to get ready to leave. Spike turned his attention to Buffy, wondering why she seemed so eager to leave all of a sudden.

“Come on pet, don’ you wanna do another sweep? Could be all sorts of nasties out there still. You an’ I could take care of it while this lot head home. Reckon they got what they needed for tonight.”

The others ignored him. Travers was already making his way out of the cemetery and no one seemed to argue against them patrolling any longer while they went home. No one that is, except Buffy. She froze at the sound of his voice and turned to glare at him. He was surprised at the angry look in her eye.

“Don’t call me pet. I said I’m going home Spike. Patrol if you want, there’s nothing else out here, do what you like I don’t care.”

She whirled around and stalked off, gripping the handle of her sword tightly and muttering. Spike gawked after her. He was all for keeping up appearances in front of the wankers but she seemed downright mad at him and he couldn’t fathom why. Even the old unpleasant Slayer she was when she was with Finn would have just told him to go home as if she was bored with him, not snapped at him like that. He caught up to her and grabbed her arm, spinning her to face him.

“Buffy? C’mon pet I just…”

She jerked away from him. The others were all watching them, a little surprised at their behaviour.

“I said don’t call me that. Go home Spike.”

“Buff…”

He made to grab her again and she narrowed her eyes. Pulling back her arm he barely registered what she was about to do before pain erupted in his nose.

“Ow! Bloody hell woman!”

Buffy walked off, passing by the Council members and Giles who seemed both bewildered and amused by the display, leaving a confused Spike behind to nurse his injured nose.

Chapter 14

Spike wiped the blood from his nose, an angry scowl on his face. The others were gone, Lydia giving him a sympathetic look before joining them. Spike hardly noticed, his attention solely focused on the fuming blonde girl who had stormed off by herself, sword swinging at her side.

What the bloody fucking hell was that? What did I do to get punched in the face this time? Wankers weren’t suspicious of anythin’. No bloody need to go an’ do that now was there?

He cracked his neck, letting the tension ease out of his shoulders and with a backward glance in the direction of Restfield, set off after Buffy.

Goin’ to get an answer one way or another. She’s got some explainin’ to do.

***


Buffy grumbled to herself as she made her way home. She hadn’t even waited for Giles to offer her a lift before walking off.

Okay so maybe hitting him was going a little overboard but he clearly wasn’t getting the hint that I just wanted to be left alone. Thinks I’m gonna run off and patrol (yeah right, that’s what he had in mind) with him after that little show in front of the Council.

Buffy kicked the sidewalk, recalling the scene in the cemetery.

Delicate thing like you. Interested in the Big Bad. Stupid flirty vampire. Oh God.

Buffy stopped in her tracks when a thought struck her.

Oh God I’m jealous! Of the Watcher girl. How can I be jealous of her? No wait it’s not her it’s Spike. Spike and his stupid winking and smiling and calling her luv. I couldn’t stand seeing him flirting with her like that. Since when does his typical Spikeness bring out the green eyed monster in me?

Well since you started dating him maybe. Or maybe since the winks and smirks and leers were directed in someone else’s direction instead of yours for a change.

I have to apologise to him don’t I?

Buffy groaned, her temper dissolving. She’d been upset seeing Spike acting like his usual flirty self and ended up punching him in the nose when he didn’t deserve it. She just had to find some way to make up for it without telling him the reason she flipped out. No way was she adding to that ego of his.

A tingle crept up her back and Buffy yelped in surprise when Spike appeared in front of her. A very pissed off Spike.

Crap.

***


Spike saw with some satisfaction that Buffy had lost the anger she’d had in the cemetery, it was now replaced with nervousness.

“Care to explain to me what I did to earn a punch to the face back there and why you’re suddenly against me callin’ you pet?”

He raised his eyebrows, lips pursed expectantly.

Buffy fidgeted with the sword in her hand, not quite looking him in the eye. He continued to wait, the silence thick between them until she couldn’t take it anymore and she sighed, finally meeting his eyes.

“I’m sorry okay? I shouldn’t have punched you. I was annoyed and I took it out on you and I shouldn’t have.”

“Damn right you shouldn’ have. What was that all about anyway? All I did was ask you to patrol, to spend some time alone together since the Council were leavin’ an’ you nearly broke my nose!”

“I said I’m sorry.”

“No no no, sorry ain’ gonna cut it luv. You better tell me why you got so pissed off at me, an’ don’ blame it on the wankers, they were already leavin’.”

Buffy rolled her eyes. He just wasn’t going to let it go until she told him.

“It’s just…you…I didn’t know they were gonna observe you too, it threw me. As far as I knew they had no idea you were even still in Sunnydale and then I see you chatting with that librarian girl about some paper she wrote on you. I was…surprised.”

“Surprised? That’s what set you off? Pardon me if I don’ quite believe you. Somethin’ else had to have…”

Buffy frowned as he trailed off. A thought seemed to have struck him as he stared blankly at her. Suddenly his eyes lit up and a grin spread across his face.

Oh no. This can’t be good.

“Well, well, well. That’s it innit it pet?”

“What Spike? What’s it? What are you on about?”

Spike smirked and hooked his thumbs into his belt loops, hands framing his crotch and drawing Buffy’s eye involuntarily towards it. She shook her head to regain focus on his still smirking face.

“You’re jealous.”

Knew it. Not good. He’ll be impossible now.

Buffy scoffed as if it was the most ridiculous thing she’d ever heard.

“Pfft. Jealous, me? Shyeah, right.”

“No use denyin’ it pet, got you all figured out now Summers. Saw me chattin’ with that Watcher bird and got your feathers ruffled. Didn’ like the way she was flirtin’ with the Big Bad. ‘Fraid my attention was on her instead o’ you.”

“Like I’d be jealous of Madam Tweed, Spike, really. I was so not jealous.”

Spike just curled his tongue up to his teeth and wagged his eyebrows, not believing her for a minute.

“I wasn’t! It was you…you and…y.y..your winking and pet names. You’re supposed to be my boyfriend but you were flirting with her right in front of me. I should be the only one you call luv or pet or kitten.”

Buffy’s shoulders slumped. So much for hiding it from him. She had been jealous and annoyed at him and now she’d never hear the end of it. She was just waiting for him to laugh and tease her about it. He didn’t. Instead she felt his arm slip around her waist and pull him to her. He tilted her chin up with his other hand so she was looking at him, a playful pout on his face.

“Oh Buffy, you know you’re the only girl I care about. The nicknames are just a habit I’ve had for years, I won’ use ‘em on anyone but you from now on if you don’ like it but you’re my only kitten. The flirtin’, it’s in my nature, yeah, an’ as far as those Council people are concerned you an’ me are reluctant allies. Can’t exactly have my eyes on you the whole time when they’re around. Not if you want to keep it secret ‘til they’re gone.”

He gave her a reassuring smile and hugged her closer, moving a stray strand of hair out of her face. Buffy couldn’t help smiling back and relaxing against him. She was being silly, getting so upset before. Spike was with her and nothing was going to change that. He was hot and she couldn’t let other women taking notice of the fact get to her. She was the one he wanted, the one he loved.

“I’m sorry about before. I know I shouldn’t have let it get to me. I’m just not used to feeling like that. Knowing I can’t say anything because we have to keep it a secret and watching her practically throw herself at you. You don’t have to drop the nicknames…as long as it’s just the Scobies, friends we know, not other women checking you out, and I get the kitten one to myself.”

Spike kissed her forehead and rubbed her back gently.

“It’s all yours kitten. Don’ worry, it’s refreshin’ seein’ you get all jealous and territorial over me, jus’ try not to take it out on my nose or any other part of me for that matter.”

Buffy smiled and nodded her agreement before they decided to walk together back to her house. Dawn was approaching and Spike wouldn’t be able to stay too much longer and Buffy really needed the rest. They said their goodbyes by the tree at her house and it was a monumental effort to pull away from each other so Buffy could go inside and go to bed. She was happy she’d gotten to see him tonight and that they hadn’t left things like that in the cemetery. Knowing she could get jealous over Spike, it made them closer somehow, more like a real couple.

Spike remained outside below her window for a while, smoking, before finally heading home to his crypt. A grin permanently fixed on his face as he thought about Buffy, his girl. He never noticed the shadowy figure hiding in some bushes across the street watching him.

The mysterious figure pulled a walkie talkie from his belt and spoke quietly into it.

“He’s leaving. Do you want me to follow?”

A staticy male voice answered.

“Negative. Report back to base. He won’t be going anywhere else tonight.”

After signing off, with a final look in the direction Spike had gone, the observer slipped away into the night.

***


The next day for the Scoobies was pretty much the same as the first, being constantly plagued by Watchers. Buffy had been put through some more special training exercises that were again, specially designed to be as confusing and difficult as possible for her. She was beginning to hate Travers even more, if that were possible. She also noticed with a scowl that Lydia wasn’t present again today.

It only takes one guess to know where she is. I can’t believe Travers is allowing one of his own team to spend her time with a soulless vampire she obviously idolises. Shouldn’t he be reprimanding her for that or something? He certainly wouldn’t let me away with it. Not that he could stop me of course.

Her anger did do her some good in the training room, at least from her point of view, when her patience ran out and she used her own tactics to hit the weasely Watcher she was sparring with extra hard and sent him flying across the room. Of course she had to apologise and she wouldn’t get any marks for abandoning their specially designed technique but it cheered her up and made her feel better. A slight smile that was quickly hidden by Giles suggested it had cheered him up too.

Once again they found themselves gathered in the shop as night fell and the Council met in their little corner speaking in hushed tones. What they could have learned in another day of Scoobie tracking the same as the last Buffy couldn’t fathom. Lydia had yet to arrive which added to her irritation. She sat at the table tapping her foot until she caught a questioning glance from Xander. She smiled and rolled her eyes, glancing at Travers to let him know she was just annoyed by the current state of affairs and he nodded before turning back to a conversation with Anya.

Pacing the room, Buffy thought she heard a noise outside in the alley. She was making her way over to the door by the counter when it suddenly flew open and several men dressed as knights wielding swords rushed in, heading straight for her.

Buffy ducked as a sword came flying at her head and when she straightened up, realised she’d been surrounded.

The others had all leaped to their feet and backed away from the door at the sudden attack.

Buffy did her best to fend her medieval enemies off, avoiding their weapons and kicking and punching them back out of range.

Realising she was unarmed, Giles rushed towards the training room but found his way blocked by another knight. He was forced back with Travers and his team into a far corner while the Scoobies were trapped against a wall by two more men with swords.

Buffy successfully kicked one of her opponents into two of his comrades, giving her time to disarm another, twisting his arm and snapping it, making him cry out in pain. Grabbing the fallen weapon, she now stood a greater chance at defending herself.

The knights weren’t giving up and continued to battle fiercely with her, clearly well experienced in sword fighting so that, despite her best efforts, she was being pushed back towards the counter and getting blocked in.

Suddenly the main door swung open and Spike charged in, Lydia and her team following. He took one look around, saw the predicament Buffy was in and rushed to her aid.

“Buffy!”

He appeared behind one of the attacking men, grabbing him by his chain mail vest.

“Spike wait! Don’t!”

Her warning was too late and Spike sent the man flying through the air until he hit the wall hard. The chip fired and he cried out in pain clutching his head.

The move had distracted the rest of her opponents and when they turned to the injured vamp Buffy took advantage of the situation landing a powerful blow with her fist to the back of one man’s head and a swift kick to another’s back, sending him face first into a wall, effectively knocking them out.

“They’re human you can’t fight them.”

“Yeah I figured, what with the blinding pain an’ all,” Spike answered, rising up to his full height and shaking his head.

Buffy had no time to respond as another sword slashed at her and she was pulled back into the fight. Noticing their fallen comrades, the men who had been guarding her friends and the Watchers decided to join in and attack Buffy, aiming to kill.

Now free to get to the training room Giles ran over, followed by Xander to grab weapons to join the fight and even things out. Willow and Tara started chanting and some of the knights’ weapons floated up out of their hands and were pointed towards them, forcing them back.

“Witches!” one of them cried as his sword pushed him away from Buffy and one of the knights nearby ran at them, sword raised.

Surprised by the oncoming attack, the wiccans gasped and their concentration was broken, the floating swords dropping to the floor. Giles had come back and intercepted the attacker with an axe, engaging him in battle.

Buffy was holding her own and caught sight of Xander stopping the men trying to get their weapons back from the corner of her eye. She parried and struck at her opponent, sending his weapon clattering to the floor and punched him, knocking him out.

“Slayer!”

The sound of a blade slicing through the air close by startled her and she spun around quickly to find a sword inches from her face. Spike was beside her, his hands gripping the steel blade tightly, blood running from his palms and dripping down the sharp edges of the sword. He grimaced at the pain but maintained his hold on the weapon that would have decapitated her if he hadn’t stopped it.

Buffy’s eyes were wide with shock and she watched as the frustrated knight kicked at Spike, pulling his sword back. Spike yelped in pain as the blade sliced his hands and fell backwards. The man raised his weapon at her again and Buffy went back into fight mode. He was the last one left and it didn’t take long to disarm him and send him sprawling on the floor on his back, her own sword poised inches from his throat as she held him down and knelt above him.

“Who are you?”

The man just stared at her, anger and contempt in his eyes.

She put more pressure on the hand holding him down and poked the tip of the sword into the hollow of his throat.

“Who are you? What are you doing here? Answer me.”

“It is better you kill me now. I will never answer your questions.”

“We’ll just have to see about that won’t we? And if you don’t talk I’m sure one of your friends will.”

“There’s really no need for that,” Travers spoke up as he approached, “I know who they are. Knights of Byzantium. They fight against Glory, or as they call her, the Beast.”

“Really? Well if they’re fighting against her why are they attacking me? Shouldn’t we be on the same side?”

“We do not fight with those who seek to protect that which must be destroyed. You stand in our way and so we are enemies.”

“What? I’m not protecting Glory.”

“Not the Beast. The Key. It must be destroyed. It is the only way to prevent the Beast from destroying our world.”

A feeling of dread swept over her as she realised what he meant. Not only did she have Glory to worry about, now these Knights of Byzantium were after her sister as well.

“Yeah well sorry to disappoint you medieval guy but Buffy doesn’t have the key. We don’t even know what or where it is,” Xander spoke up.

“Even so. When she does find it she will protect it. She cannot hope to defeat the Beast. Better to kill you and keep you out of our way while we search for the Key than to let it fall into your hands.”

Relief washed over her, knowing that at least they didn’t know about Dawn. Her sister was safe, for now, but Buffy would have to be extra careful. For now they were just after her. She stood and removed her sword from the man’s throat, staring him down with her best Slayer look.

“You lost. Take your men and go. I don’t kill humans. You attack me or mine again, however, and I won’t think twice about ending you. Now leave.”

The man stood, his conscious comrades helped carry those who were still knocked out, out the door. He turned before leaving, facing her with a cold and stony stare of his own.

“This is not over Slayer. I am merely a small part of an army. Destroy the key or we will be forced to kill you and all others who stand in our way.”

Buffy watched as he left, keeping her eyes on the door until she was sure he wasn’t coming back.

“Do you think that was wise? They will certainly be back again, with even more men next time.”

Buffy looked at Travers, Slayer face still firmly in place.

“What do you suggest I do, kill them? Not in my job description. Besides, they’re going to focus on getting the key before I do now. I won’t have to worry about them for a while.”

“So you really don’t have it then?”

“Do you really think I’d tell you if I did?”

The head of the Council and the Slayer stared each other down, tension thick in the air. If there was ever any doubt as to how little trust and how much bitterness lay between the two it would have evaporated from the current scene.

“Yes well, I think perhaps we should put off patrol for tonight. That was more than enough action for one day and it’s certainly given us much to think about. Quentin if you have information on these knights perhaps you could share what you know about them?” Giles stepped in, trying to diffuse the situation.

Travers looked away from Buffy, clasping his hands behind his back as he considered Giles.

“It is time to call it a night. We can forego patrolling this time. I will be more than happy to share the information with you…” he paused, regarding them both before continuing, “…once Miss Summers has passed her evaluation.”

Buffy felt her temper flare and had quite a few choice words rushing to spring free from her mouth about where he could shove his evaluation when Lydia’s voice caught her attention.

“Oh you poor thing! Here let me see.”

Buffy turned to see the bookish woman squatting beside Spike on the floor, reaching out to his injured hands as he winced in pain. Suddenly all her rage was replaced by that growling monster in the pit of her stomach whose possessiveness rose up screaming ‘Mine!’

She strode purposefully toward the pair and squatted down in front of Spike, who looked up at her warily as she took his hands in hers before Lydia could reach them. Flattening them out, ignoring his little hiss of pain, she inspected the gashes carefully.

“You’ll be fine. They’re pretty deep but you’ll heal fast. We should clean them up and get them bandaged though. We have a first aid kit in back, come on.”

She stood up and without a backwards glance, made her way to the training room where a first aid kit was kept in case she got a little too carried away during her work out. It was really more for Giles or whoever else she was sparring with than her. Watching as she walked away, confusion evident on his face, Spike eventually got up and followed her, nursing his injured hands and leaving Lydia squatting on the floor a little dazed.

The Scoobies stared after them, all a bit puzzled at her concern for the annoying bleached menace, if you could call it that. She hadn’t sounded very concerned but it was unusual for her to even notice if Spike got hurt. Usually she was the one hurting him.

Buffy ignored them all and walked into the training room heading straight for where the first aid kit was kept. She was pulling out gauze and iodine when Spike came in. She looked up and gestured for him to sit on the nearby bench before ducking her head and continuing to gather up what she’d need.

Spike sat where she’d told him and observed her, listening to the muffled voices floating through the door. The wankers were getting ready to leave and the others were discussing a number of things in little groups, from the knights, to the key, to why Buffy had brought him in back to tend to his hands. He had an idea why but he never for one second expected her to show any worry for him in front of the others. Granted she hadn’t exactly gushed and fretted over him the way the Watcher bird had but it was more than she’d ever done before.

Buffy came towards him and began the rather painful process of cleaning off the wounds, applying pressure and tightly bandaging them up with the gauze. Spike watched her as she worked, her blonde hair falling over her face as she concentrated on his hands. He felt a lump form in his throat at her gentle treatment, not even minding the occasional sting as she cleaned his wounds. They wouldn’t get infected what with him being a vampire and all but she wanted to be thorough and it warmed his unbeating heart to see how much she cared about him.

When she was done she looked up into his eyes and smiled.

“There. All done. You’ll heal in no time.”

“Buffy…”

She was caught in the intensity of his gaze, so full of love and adoration. She wanted to look away but she couldn’t. Her heart was pounding and her breathing was coming in short gasps. He really did wear his heart on his sleeve and she could feel herself falling as she stared back into his deep blue eyes.

They were frozen, staring at each other only inches apart, his hands still in hers, her thumbs caressing his bandaged palms without her even noticing.

“Buffy? Travers and his team left, are you heading home? Oh, is…um…Spike…okay?”

Buffy whipped around to see Willow standing in the doorway looking at them, her brow furrowed. She was about to say something else but the shock of being caught by one of her friends while she was looking all goo-goo eyes at Spike set in and Buffy flinched, pressing her thumbs into Spike’s sore palms, making him cry out.

“Ow! Bloody hell Slayer!”

Realising what she done Buffy turned wide eyes towards him and dropped his hands, jumping back a little.

“Oops, sorry.”

“Some bleedin’ Florence Nightingale you are luv. Slayer’s weren’t meant to be nurses obviously.”

“Hey I said I was sorry. Fine, just bleed all over the place next time you big jerk.”

Willow rolled her eyes but seemed to relax at the more familiar scene before her. It was weird that Buffy had even done anything for Spike in the first place but it was obviously nothing if she still managed to hurt him and end up bickering like they always did. She probably just wanted to look good helping an injured ally for the evaluation.

“Okay well, we’re all leaving now too, so, see you tomorrow?”

“Yeah, bye Wills. Tell Giles I’ll walk. I could use the fresh air.”

Willow left and Buffy released the breath she’d been holding and turned back to Spike who was scowling.

“What? I said I was sorry. It was just a reaction, I couldn’t help it. It’s not like I meant to hurt you that time.”

“Beginning to think your carin’ side might do more damage than when you actually mean to hurt me.”

Buffy crossed her arms and scowled back at him, then she turned the scowl into a pout.

“So I shouldn’t try to look after you anymore then?”

Spike rolled his eyes and let out a frustrated sigh. God help him but he was powerless against that pout.

“Course you should luv. Sorry I snapped at you. C’mon, let’s get you home then.”

He stood and walked over to her, placing his arm around her shoulders he led her to the door at the back of the training room and she leaned into him, wrapping one arm around his waist.

“Great, and on the way you can tell me all about what you did with your Watcher entourage all day and how you happened to turn up with them.”

“Jus’ wanted to see you so I decided to tag along since they know about me an’ all. Not much to tell otherwise. Watched Passions for most of it.”

She laughed. That was so like Spike. She could picture it now, all crowded around watching his favourite soap. That would be something for their Watcher diaries.

***


They had another pleasant walk back to her house and stopped in their usual spot by the tree when they got there. Spike leaned in for a kiss and Buffy happily returned it, tangling her fingers in his hair and pulling him closer. Things were getting pretty heated and it wasn’t long before Buffy had to pull back for breath.

“This is killin’ me you know, havin’ to say goodbye to you every night when all I want is to haul you off to my crypt and keep you in my bed for days.”

“Me too,” Buffy agreed, “you know, I’m really not that tired. Maybe you could, I dunno, come in for a while? If you’re quiet. Everyone will be asleep by now.”

She ran a finger up his chest and licked her bottom lip seductively. Spike grinned, clearly delighted with her suggestion.

“I like that idea, but I won’t be the one that’ll have to keep quiet luv.”

He curled his tongue behind his teeth and Buffy was very eager to get him inside.

“I’ll do my best. Well come on then.”

She grabbed his arm and pulled him to the door but they didn’t even make it to the front step before falling into another passionate kiss. Buffy fumbled around, searching for her key but was forced to give up and pull away from Spike to see what she was doing. Eventually she found it and hurried to put it in the lock while Spike nuzzled her neck from behind, making her hands shake and struggle to coordinate and open the door. Suddenly he pulled back and Buffy whimpered at the sudden loss.

“Spike what are you…?”

“Shh pet.”

He was staring off intently to the side of her house at the bushes. Buffy watched as he concentrated for a minute before a growl erupted from his throat.

“Spike what is it?”

“We’re being watched.”

Chapter 15

Buffy froze and looked over at the bushes Spike had been staring at. She couldn’t see, hear or feel anything. She looked back at Spike who was still staring fixedly at the same spot, jaw clenched.

“What?” she croaked panicked.

Who could be following them? Was it the Watchers? Had they seen her and Spike together? This was really bad.

“Spike?”

He didn’t answer, his attention fully focused in the direction of the bushes. Buffy reached out a hand to try and break him out of his trance but he suddenly took off with a snarl, running with vampire speed toward his quarry.

“Spike!” Buffy called, taking off after him.

Spike dived over the bushes into the neighbour’s yard and Buffy heard a thud followed by a surprised yell and a growl. She leaped into the next door yard and was met with the sight of Spike standing up, hauling one of Glory’s lacky’s to his feet and pinning his arms behind him.

“Lookie, lookie what I found. Anyone you know Slayer?”

Buffy stared coldly at the nasty looking hobgoblin in front of her, whimpering in pain as Spike tightened his grip on the minion’s arms, crushing them painfully against his back.

“Yeah. He’s one of Glory’s pets. What are you doing following me? How long has this been going on? No, you know what? I think we should take this somewhere more private, where you can give us some answers.”

The minion hissed as Spike shoved him forward a step, before smiling stupidly up at Buffy.

“You have my mistress’ key. It is only natural she sent me to follow you in search of it. We can avoid any unpleasantness and you will not have to fear being followed if you return it to her.”

“Pfft, yeah, I don’t think so. There’s going to be quite a bit of unpleasantness unless you cooperate and answer my questions.”

“Where d’you fancy takin’ this Slayer? My crypt?”

“It certainly sets the mood, but…I should probably call Giles and have him join us. He might prefer his place or the shop.”

“Think that’s wise pet?”

Buffy furrowed her brow in confusion, cocking her head to the side.

“What d’ya mean?”

Spike swallowed back a smile. She was just so bloody adorable when she did that. Like a bewildered puppy.

“Well we want to make scabby here talk yeah? Don’ need the Ripper to do that with me around an’ you never know exactly what info he might give up.”

Buffy still looked puzzled. Spike sighed and raised an eyebrow at her expectantly. The minion was glancing back and forth, confused himself, although he couldn’t really see Spike behind him.

Buffy thought about what Spike meant when it suddenly hit her.

Oh! The hobbit with leprosy might tell Giles about us. I’m not ready for him to know about that. That would be bad. I’m such an idiot sometimes.

Spike couldn’t help his lip twitching in a smile when he saw the penny drop.

“Good point. Okay your crypt it is and you’re right, there’s no need for Giles to get involved. After all, a Slayer and a vampire? Should be no problem beating the info out of him.”

The minion wriggled and squirmed as Spike began leading him away, Buffy following, arms crossed. She heard a door open and turned around to see a sleepy-eyed Dawn peeping around the front door.

“Buffy?”

“Dawn! Get inside, now.”

Their hostage squirmed around, attempting to look behind him but a snarl followed by a sharp twist of the arm from Spike kept him moving.

“What’s going on?”

“Dawn go back to bed. I’m handling it. I’ll be home later than usual. I have some questions to ask our new friend here. I’ll see you in the morning okay.”

Dawn rubbed her eyes and with another look from Buffy, nodded and shut the door. Buffy waited a minute before following Spike off into the night.

Unbeknownst to the two blondes, there was more than one observer watching them. Hidden away in an ordinary garden ornament was a camera, one that had taken in the entire scene from their arrival outside Buffy’s home until they had left with one of Glory’s worshippers.

***

The tall man’s hands clenched as he watched the scene play out on the monitor. It took every ounce of self control he had not to punch the offending piece of equipment that had forever burned the image of Buffy and that thing into his brain.

He barely noticed as one of his men stepped forward cautiously to stand beside him.

“Sir? What are your orders? Do we attack?”

Pulling his eyes away from the screen as the petite blonde moved out of sight of the camera he turned to face the junior officer who had addressed him.

“Not yet. I want to plan this out properly. That hostile is craftier than it looks, and it has a Slayer protecting it. No mistakes this time. When we attack, we aim to kill. I want him eliminated, understood?”

The officer straightened up, saluting the taller man who scared him with the coldness of his eyes.

“Sir, yes, sir! Target is to be destroyed sir!”

“Good, now get back to work.”

The officer hurried away, glad to be away from his commander’s presence. All the men knew that this was no ordinary mission. This was a personal vendetta against the only hostile to ever escape and evade recapture from the Initiative, and if the rumours were true, had a lot to do with why their commander was here in Sunnydale tracking the Slayer instead of deep in the jungle on the top priority mission his former unit was on. The whole situation unnerved him, and he just hoped that once they took care of Hostile 17, things would get back on track, but he very much doubted it.

Glancing back at the monitor that was now fixed on the quiet front yard of the house on Revello Drive, Riley fought back the urge to vomit. He knew. He just couldn’t believe that she would actually…

He snarled and stalked off to his private quarters. He needed to get away and compose himself out of sight of the others. They looked at him suspiciously lately. Of course they wouldn’t question his actions as their commander but rumours were circulating about him and he had to be careful, especially since those rumours were true.

Once alone, he headed to the bathroom and leaned over the sink, splashing water on his face and trying to compose himself. He noticed that his hands were shaking and he clutched the cool enamel of the basin tightly. He stared up at his reflection in the mirror.

Riley was pale, his eyes were bloodshot from hours staring at the various monitors in the base and lack of sleep. He hadn’t been to the vampires in a couple of days and withdrawal was setting in. He would have to go tonight. He’d lost so much blood and too many eyes were on him lately for him to risk it but he needed to go tonight.

It’s all that bitch’s fault. I only started going there because of her. Now look at me. She’s destroyed me!

Riley smashed the mirror with a growl and then laughed insanely as his hand began to bleed. He had to save that for them, he couldn’t afford to waste it like that. He opened the medicine cabinet and began to bandage it as best he could.

When Riley had left the Summers house that evening he’d headed straight for the seemingly abandoned building which occupied a large nest of vamps who fed off humans who were willingly letting themselves be bitten. He’d stumbled upon it after allowing a vamp to live after she’d bitten him outside Willy’s one night. She told him to come by if he wanted to be fed on again so he decided to check it out. At first he was disgusted at the sight, but he was weak. He had to know what it felt like, had to know what she saw in them, and it was thrilling. He felt so needed, he was their life source. He’d become an addict to the point that he was now physically quite drained, yet he couldn’t wait more than a few days to allow his blood to build up before going back. The shaking and trembling would become too obvious, and his need outweighed his willpower.

He hadn’t been lying about taking up his former unit on their offer to return to the military. They’d given him a choice. He could travel into the depths of the jungle with them to the heart of the mission, or he could head the team in Sunnydale observing the Hellmouth and killing the dangerous hostiles. There was no contest between which was the better offer and they’d only given him a choice because they knew he wanted to be with the Slayer. Of course they were hoping he’d decide he was better than her whipping boy but he’d chosen Sunnydale. Graham had tried to convince him otherwise but Riley had made his mind up, he was staying, just not for the reason they thought.

He’d already broken up with Buffy when he accepted their offer. He was staying because he had to know. He hated that he’d listened to Spike, that the annoying, peroxided menace had gotten to him like that but he had. With every comment he made, every niggling doubt in Riley’s mind grew until all he could see was how much Buffy didn’t love him. The way she looked at Spike made him envious, he never thought for a second she would actually consider the irritating Brit for a partner but there was always such passion in her eyes, her voice when she was with him, she had never looked at Riley like that and he hated it.

Riley sat on his bed and held his head in his hand. He had to wait a little while before he could slip away to the nest. Unwanted, the scene from earlier replayed in his mind and he pulled at his hair as his anger took over again.

He wanted revenge on Spike. He meant every word when he told Buffy the chip wouldn’t stop him from dusting the vamp. As far as Riley was concerned, Spike was to blame for his relationship with Buffy falling apart and he was going to make him pay. He did the job he was supposed to at first, playing the good boy, earning the government’s trust again, and then he began organising his team to track the one that had gotten away before and keep an eye on the Slayer, never thinking he’d see what he had. He claimed that Hostile 17 was still a threat, not to mention the military property in his brain. He didn’t care that the men saw through him, they wouldn’t dare question his authority, he could be scary when he wanted to.

Riley smiled to himself at the irony as he prepared to leave the base. Breaking up with Buffy had led him to become the darker kind of man she craved. The monster he now was.

***

Buffy and Spike exited the line of trees from the woods near the cemetery where they had dumped the demon’s body. Some other creature of the night was bound to pick it up for a meal. Buffy hadn’t intended to kill the guy but after they’d beaten what they could out of him, he’d run off, finding time to escape while they were discussing what they’d learned. Not wanting him to run off to Glory they had no choice but to track him down and kill him.

“Stupid devoted minions. They don’t know what’s good for them. I might have let him go if he promised to take off.”

Spike didn’t answer. He knew how it would end from the minute he grabbed the bugger. At least now they knew to be more careful. Glory was sending scouts out to keep an eye on the Slayer in hopes that she’d lead her to the Key. Good news was they had no idea what the Key was or if Buffy really had it yet. So far he was the first scout to be sent out, which meant their secret was safe for a while and Glory had learned nothing.

“So I guess we should ease up on the smoochies outside the house for a while. That sucks.”

“Hey now, let’s not be hasty. I caught on before any real harm was done. You can’t invite me in one minute an’ then put a ban on kissin’ the next.”

“Not like I want to but we can’t run the risk of being caught again until after my friends know. I can invite you in, although who knows when we’ll get the chance again, just no more being all affectionate in public.”

“We barely see each other as it is an’ I’m feelin’ deprived here Slayer. I want you so bad I can hardly stand it.”

“Trust me, you’re not the only one. God I hate this, all I want is to jump you whenever I want and let everything else sort itself out.”

Spike leaned in to Buffy and trailed a bandaged hand through her soft hair.

“So why don’ you?”

Buffy leaned into his touch and her eyelids fluttered as his cool breath crossed her face.

“I very much want to. Spike, there’s only tonight…”

He cut her off with a kiss and Buffy sighed against him, wrapping her arms around his waist.

“Then take tonight. Spend it with me an’ worry ‘bout the rest later.”

One look in his blue eyes and Buffy gave in. It had been far too long since they’d been together and at least for tonight they could pretend nothing else existed.

“As long as you agree to let me leave in the morning.”

Spike grinned.

“We’ll see.”

They barely made it to the bottom level of Spike’s crypt before they were ripping each other’s clothes off. Buffy had to help Spike because of his hands but after a lot of frustrated tugging and pulling they soon found themselves naked on the bed.

Buffy scooted up until her head was on the pillow and licked her lips hungrily as Spike hovered over her, eyes clouded with lust and drinking her in from head to toe. She lifted a foot and rubbed along his thigh to his waist and back down again, pleased at the shiver that ran through him.

“Are you just going to sit there staring all night?”

Spike smirked and moved up her body, dropping light kisses along her skin as he went, sending a thrill of anticipation through her and making her breath hitch.

“Jus’ admirin’ the view luv, been a while, even more gorgeous than I remember.”

Spike rested above her and swooped down for a kiss. She caught his head in her hands, running them through his hair and messing it up just the way she liked it. They savoured each other’s mouths, tongues twirling when Spike suddenly flinched. Buffy pulled back worried.

“What’s wrong, did I hurt you?”

She immediately relaxed her hold on his hair but Spike shook his head.

“No luv, not you. Put a bit too much weight on my hands is all, I’ll be fine, little more delicate than usual, jus’ have to try an’ remember.”

“Oh. Are you sure you’re okay? I don’t want you opening those wounds up because you’re being a stubborn macho ass.”

“Gee thanks. Really pet I’m fine. I intend to love you good an’ proper like I’ve been wantin’ to every night.”

Buffy smiled at him. He would always put her first. She knew he loved her, the fact he was willing to keep them a secret and say goodbye to her at her door each night like a gentleman because she wanted him to was proof of that. She wondered how he could be so devoted to her when they’d only been together a short while. She stroked his cheek and stared into his warm blue gaze as he returned her smile. Her heart skipped a beat and she felt a lump forming in her throat. Startled by the sudden rush of emotion she blinked and came out of her trance.

“All the same, I’d rather not run the risk of you getting carried away and hurting yourself. I think the safest thing to do is to switch and let me be on top this time.”

Spike raised an eyebrow and tilted his head slightly.

“I see. And is this purely out of concern or are you jus’ tryin’ to get back in the drivin’ seat you like so much?”

Relieved to have moved away from the intense feelings overcoming her previously Buffy responded to his teasing with their typical banter.

“Maybe. Are you telling me you have a problem with that?”

“Not at all kitten. I’m more than happy to lay back an’ enjoy the sight of you bouncin’ above me.”

“Well then,” Buffy said, pressing against his chest and easing him onto his back, “I guess this time it’s your turn to lie down and let me take proper care of you.”

Spike bit his bottom lip, watching as she poised above him, running her hands over his abs, up his chest and back down, her nails grazing his skin lightly. She leaned down and kissed the hollow of his throat, moving steadily down between his pecs before turning to lick at a nipple.

“Buffy,” he breathed, and she smiled, turning her attention to the other nipple, making him gasp.

“I’m going to take my time with you Spike. I have you all alone and vulnerable under me and kitten wants to play.”

Spike moaned at her words. Damn but she was sexy. He hoped she wouldn’t tease him too much, she was already driving him wild but he wasn’t going to complain if she did.

Buffy continued to move down his body with soft kisses and licks, stopping occasionally to nip lightly at the skin before continuing on. She followed the path of his abs and traced his hipbones, stoking his sides as she drove him into a frenzy.

“Buffy, please, pet, I want you so much.”

She grinned, glad she could have the same affect on him that he could on her. She traced his bellybutton with her tongue and moved down the light trail of brown hair, guiding her toward the darker curls and her prize.

His erection twitched as she neared it and she caught it in her hand, looking up to see Spike’s face. He gasped as she began to stroke his cock and she understood why he liked to look at her when he drove her wild with his mouth. His expressions and reactions fascinated her and knowing she was the one causing those helpless whimpers and gasps gave her a sense of power and pleasure. She moved closer and licked along the underside of his cock from base to tip and his eyes flew open.

Spike watched, amazed and thrilled as she swirled her tongue over the head before lowering her lips and sucking on it. He couldn’t help his hips thrusting up slightly from the sensation as he wove his hands through her hair, ignoring the slight sting and savouring the pleasure instead.

Buffy stroked him with her hand in time with her mouth as her head began bobbing up and down on him. She’d never really been into oral sex before, mainly because she hadn’t had good oral sex before and had thought it degrading. Now she knew the control she had and Spike was delicious, she wanted to do this and she was enjoying it almost as much as he was. She took more and more of him into her mouth each time until she almost had him in fully. She undulated her tongue releasing a strangled cry from Spike as his hips arched off the bed.

“Bloody hell! Slayer, Buffy, get up here now before I lose it.”

Buffy considered staying where she was and swallowing him down when he came. She wanted to do it but it had been so long she wanted him inside her too much and she released him.

“Later,” she whispered as she pressed a kiss to the tip of his cock and moved upwards to straddle him.

She knew his vamp hearing had heard what she’d said and his eyes had widened a little but she halted any questions about her whispered promise by rising up and rubbing her slit against his hardened shaft. They both groaned and Spike grabbed her hips, urging her down. She positioned herself above him before sinking down slowly, gasping as he filled her up.

The sensation was incredible. For both it was like coming home and it was seconds before Buffy began moving into a steady rhythm which Spike followed. They moved slowly at first, savouring the feeling of being together again but soon they craved more. Buffy began moving faster and grinding against Spike’s pelvis when she came down, stimulating her clit and building the pleasure inside her. Spike’s thrusts became harder and he was hitting that spot inside that had her shouting his name.

She forced her eyes open so she could look at him and make eye contact. Everything was more intense as their gaze met and they felt their release approaching.

“SPIKE! OH GOD, I’M CUMMING SPIKE! CUM WITH ME! MMM, YES! OH GOD!”

“AHH BUFFY! FUCK PET I’M CUMMING! WANT TO FEEL YOU AROUND ME, AARGH BUFFY!”

Once more the walls echoed with the sounds of their coupling as they screamed and growled their release. Buffy collapsed down on top of Spike, sated and overwhelmingly happy. He hugged her close and kissed the side of her face softly.

“You’re gonna be the end o’ me pet. How the bloody hell did I get so lucky?”

“You’re not the lucky one Spike, I am. I don’t know what I’d do without you.”

Spike chuckled and kissed her again.

“Reckon we’ll have to agree to disagree on that one luv. What matters is you’re here now an’ I have no intention of letting’ you go.”

“Mmmm I wish I could stay here forever instead of just ‘til morning.”

“Tell me ‘bout it. If I had my way you’d be chained to my bed an’ not allowed to leave.”

Buffy shifted so she could look at him while she stroked his chest.

“There’s mention of those chains again. Do you really own some? That could be interesting.”

Spike groaned and pulled her in for a kiss.

“You best not say things like that if you want to get any sleep before sun-up. Now jus’ curl up beside me an’ we’ll put any ideas involvin’ chains away ‘til we have more time to explore them.”

Buffy released a put-upon sigh.

“Okay. If you insist.”

Spike growled.

“I bloody well do, minx.”

Laughing, Buffy snuggled up to her boyfriend and, wrapped in each other’s arms, they fell asleep, feeling safe in the knowledge that as long as they were together everything would work out.

Chapter 16

Buffy’s sleep-fogged brain registered the sound of the heavy crypt door banging shut and she blinked, trying to pull herself awake. She moved to sit up but found herself pinned by a strong muscular arm gripping her tightly. She sighed in relief and twisted around to look at her sleeping lover. For a moment she thought Spike had left but he was still cuddled up beside her.

So then why did the door…?

“Spike? Hello? Is anyone here?”

Buffy knew that voice.

Female. British. Think brain think. Oh. Oh shit!

Buffy rocketed up in the bed, her Slayer strength forcing Spike’s arm off her.

“Crap! Shit, shit, shit! Spike, wake up! Where are my clothes? What time is it? Crap. Spike!”

Spike was awake from the moment his arm left Buffy’s body but he was still in a sleepy haze and was confused when he opened his eyes to see Buffy scrambling around his bedchamber locating her clothes and stumbling into them.

“Wha’s happenin’? Where’s the fire luv?”

Buffy hopped around on one foot trying to get her pants on while looking for her shoes.

“Spike, get up already. We overslept. Watcher lady’s here to…watch you and I shouldn’t be here. We can’t let them find us. God will you get out of bed and get dressed already?”

Buffy successfully got her pants on and found her shoes, plopping down on the bed to put them on. Spike was leisurely stepping out of bed, running a hand through his hair which apparently didn’t hurt anymore. Buffy had no time to be pleased about his vampire healing at the moment and found his casual attitude to their situation extremely irritating. She spotted his jeans lying at her feet and tossed them at him. His reflexes allowed him to catch them before they smacked into his face which annoyed her a little. He deserved a smack the way he was acting like this was no big deal. He raised an eyebrow at her and slowly began to get dressed.

“Calm down pet, there’s no need to get your knickers twisted.”

Buffy gaped at him. Was he serious?

“Spike the Council are here. They’re going to find us together like this and you can’t see how that would be a bad thing?”

She was struggling to keep her voice low enough for no one to hear them upstairs but it was really difficult at the moment. If she couldn’t shout at him she’d have to smack him round the head soon and she was really trying to ease off hitting him now they were a couple. He was making it very difficult for her.

Spike slid his t-shirt on over his head and pulled it down, walking over to her, seemingly oblivious to any danger from the panicked girl at the foot of his bed.

“Relax Buffy. They aren’ gonna come down here, they don’ even know this room exists.”

“It won’t take long for them to spot the trap door Spike and they won’t have any problem trespassing on a vampire’s lair. How am I gonna get out without them seeing me?”

Spike placed his hands on her shoulders and waited for her to look him in the eye.

“You’re not gonna like it but, you’ll have to go through the tunnels and take the sewer exit. I’d take you but I should go get rid o’ them before they come down here.”

Buffy stared at him with a scowl on her face.

“Eww. You know this is your fault, right? Always trapping me here and making me late.”

Spike dropped a kiss on her forehead and squeezed her shoulders before stepping back and nodding in the direction of the tunnels.

“I know. Best get goin’ luv. Exits that way, I’ll go take care o’ these pillocks.”

Buffy watched as he headed for the ladder, looking back over his shoulder at her. She was still annoyed that she’d have to walk through the nasty sewers but she knew she couldn’t blame him for that. She couldn’t wait until the Council left and she didn’t have to worry about this stuff anymore. She gave him a small smile and a little wave which he returned before she left, disappearing into the dark tunnels. Spike watched her go for a minute.

Too bloody adorable.

He heard them moving about upstairs and sighed. Yet another fun-filled day with these tossers. At least he didn’ have it too bad since that Lydia bint clearly admired him, not that he’d do anythin’ ‘bout it. He had his girl.

He listened and waited ‘til he heard them talking in a far corner before silently opening the trap door and climbing through it, closing it quietly after him. He rose up to a full standing position and stepped forward a bit into the middle of the room, hooking his thumbs in his belt loops and waiting for them to notice him.

Lydia spotted him first, turning around and letting out a startled “Eep!” when she spotted him. The other two with her jumped in surprise as well, pulling their crossbows up to aim at him. He just smirked in amusement and strolled over to the fridge to get some blood.

“Mornin’ all. Take it you still have questions then? Don’ see what more I have to tell you.”

“Where did you come from? The place was empty when we got here.”

Spike added some burba weed to his blood before taking a large gulp, noticing the disgust on the Watchers’ faces. He licked his lips and hummed his satisfaction before heading towards the beat up old armchair and flicking the telly on.

“Someplace private. Creature of the night remember? Can’t have you knowin’ all my secrets no matter how much you might want to.”

He sat down and stared at the t.v. completely ignoring them. His thoughts were all on Buffy and last night and he struggled to keep his face impassive.

“Yes, well…um…I suppose we should just monitor your routine day again then.”

Spike rolled his eyes. They’d done that yesterday. How much did they expect him to do as a vampire in broad daylight? By all rights he should be asleep right now. That he would normally venture outside and visit Buffy and her pals didn’ matter. They didn’ know any different after all.

“Well then you’re in for another evenin’ in front of the telly aren’ you? Some excitin’ job you’ve got there. Right bloody fulfillin’.”

He took another sip of his blood while they all took up positions around the crypt. It was gonna be another long bloody day.

***

A frustrated wail broke out through the fancy mansion that harboured Glory and her scabby minions.

“Where the heck is my scout? Can’t I rely on anyone around here to do their job properly?”

Jinx and another nasty hobgoblin tried to appease her but she was pissed off and having none of it. She flung a pair of shoes at them and continued to pace around the room.

“Find him already. What is with you useless animals?”

Another underling came rushing into the room and whispered hurriedly into Jinx’s ear. Jinx looked at the messenger who nodded and then turned back to Glory. She was not going to like this.

Gathering his courage he told his mistress that her scout had been found dead in the woods, some of Sunnydale’s more unpleasant nightlife having discovered the body until it was quite mutilated, but it was safe to assume the Slayer had killed him. Glory levelled her cold eyes on him before erupting in a loud shout.

“SHE DID WHAT?”

***

“Sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry. I’m late, I know I’m late but there was this thing last night I had to deal with and I was tired and I’m here now so we can get started.”

Buffy burst into the training room, babbling away furiously and stripping off her jacket while Giles, Travers and the rest of the Watchers looked up in surprise at her loud entrance. Travers glared at her while she prepared for a training session, securing tape around her hands.

“Ah yes. Well I’m pleased you could finally find the time to join us. I…thing? What thing?”

Buffy looked up, beginning a few quick stretches.

“Huh?”

Travers reigned in his irritation and took a deep breath, narrowing his eyes at the flustered girl who had somehow managed to become one of the longest lived Slayers in history.

“The thing that detained you last night. The reason you are late this morning. That thing.”

“Oh right. Yeah, one of Glory’s minions showed up outside my house. The first scout she decided to send out to spy on me. I questioned him about Glory but he didn’t give up much, just that he was the first spy and she was still looking for the Key but doesn’t know what it is any more than we do. He tried to escape and I had to kill him.”

She conveniently glossed over the fact that Spike had been with her and she’d ended up staying at his place until Lydia and her crew had almost walked in on them and she had to sneak out through the sewers. She cringed at the memory of crawling out of that smelly manhole and sneaking into her house later only to bump into Joyce on her way upstairs. Startled eyes had met and Buffy was praying her mother wouldn’t ask any questions, knowing full well where she must have been when the distinct smell of the sewer became noticeable and Buffy rushed up to her room to grab some clean clothes and take a shower, leaving a confused Joyce on the stairs wrinkling her nose.

Giles moved forward to stand next to Buffy.

“Why didn’t you call? I could have helped you with him.”

“I kinda had my hands full and it was nothing I couldn’t handle. They really aren’t all that dangerous physically speaking, once you don’t let them spy on you and beating up demons is my job. I took care of it.”

She knew Giles had been referring to his skills of torture when he was the Ripper. He was very effective at it but Buffy didn’t like that side of him. It was so unlike the Giles she knew. The man who was her surrogate father.

Travers thankfully saw no need to question her any further and instead recommended they get back to the training routine. For once Buffy was glad to be getting down to business even though they were trying to make her mess up as much as possible with their complicated strategies.

***

“So is everyone clear?”

“Sir, yes sir.”

Riley looked around at each of his men, the crack team he had assembled for tonight’s mission.

“Good. Go get ready. I don’t want any mistakes tonight.”

His men all nodded, saluting before he dismissed them and headed to his room. Soon he would be rid of the pest that had been a thorn in Riley’s side from the minute he’d captured him. He smirked when he thought of how easily his enemy would turn to dust, helpless to defend himself. Tonight would be a good night.

***

The minute the sun set Spike was on his way out of the crypt, his merry band of Watchers following. They struggled to keep up as he made his way to the Magic shop. They had of course questioned him about yesterday and whether Buffy normally acted that way. He knew Lydia was suspicious about the way Buffy had brought him in back to take care of him even though she hadn’t exactly been nice about it. He gave them a snarky answer about how she just couldn’t afford to have someone with super strength on her team injured and that she’d hurt him more than the sword, playing nurse. His hands were pretty much healed and he’d removed the bandages, two angry red scars in place of the deep gashes that had been there. Another day or two and you’d never know he’d been hurt.

“You seem in an awful hurry to see the Slayer and her friends.”

“Not really but it gets you lot back to your wanker of a boss quicker and hey, might be somethin’ to fight again, somethin’ of the demon variety this time.

They were nearing the shop, Spike couldn’t wait to get rid of them, even if he was walking into a shop full of them Buffy would be there, and having her close to him would be worth it. They could see the large Magic Box sign as they approached and Spike quickened his pace. His senses kicked in seconds before the pain did and he roared and fell to the ground, electrical surges coursing through his body.

The Watchers panicked when he fell and twirled around looking for their enemy. Lydia’s eyes widened when she saw they were surrounded by men in dark clothing, their faces covered, all wielding large guns.

“The Initiative! I thought you were disbanded.”

One of the men stepped forward, pulling off his mask, his attention drawn to the vampire lying semi-conscious on the ground.

“Not the Initiative, government. We’re monitoring the Hellmouth and removing any threats to the citizens of Sunnydale.”

“That’s what the Slayer is here for.”

Riley turned cold eyes toward the woman. He pointed his gun at Spike as he spoke.

“With things like that running around I guess she’s not doing her job then is she?”

“He’s an ally, he fights demons, he’s no danger to humans.”

“We put the chip in his head remember? I know what he’s capable of and not being able to bite doesn’t mean he can’t still hurt them other ways. He’s evil and he can hurt demons, meaning he can lead a group of them if he wants and let them do his dirty work. Not to mention that chip is government property. It’s our job to eliminate him.”

Riley headed towards Spike, removing a stake from his jacket.

“If you dust him you won’t get the chip back!”

“I’d rather let it be dust than continue to let him live and there’s no way I’m wasting the time and effort of having it removed. Too great a risk he’d escape before we could kill him.”

He stood over Spike, rolling him over with his foot until he could look the vampire in the eye. Spike was aware of who was in front of him, they hadn’t quite knocked him out with that jolt this time but he was in no shape to move and try to defend himself, not that he could since they were human.

“Well Spike, this is the end for you. Got any last words?”

Spike knew he was done for unless he could stall, even then he didn’t know if it would do any good. He couldn’t fight. The Watchers were no help and the others had no idea they were out here.

“Finn. Might have known you wouldn’ stay gone. I’m touched I got to you enough to have you plottin’ my death. Did you really need your pals to bring me down? You really are pathetic. Don’ even think you can handle a defenseless vamp on your own.”

Riley dropped down, holding Spike with a knee pressed against his stomach and the stake poised over his chest, another hand wrapped around the vamp’s throat.

“Congratulations Spike. You wanted to drive Buffy away from me and you did. You wanted her and you got her. Guess you were right after all. She does like a monster in her man. Reckon that means I’ll have another shot with her after I stake you? Reckon I’m monster enough for her now?”

He pressed the stake into Spike’s chest until it broke the skin. Spike winced but then he laughed. Riley was furious.

“What’s so funny?”

“You are mate. You drove Buffy away all on your own, it had nothin’ to do with me. Face it, I was just the voice in your head that kept all those doubts and insecurities o’ yours alive. I never believed I had a shot with her but you did. S’why you stayed innit? You think she’ll want you any more for dustin’ me? You really don’ know her at all do you? You think you’re a monster? You’re just a sad pathetic loser holdin’ a grudge who needs all his toy soldiers to make him feel like a real man. Still as dull an’ borin’ as ever White-bread.”

Riley’s eyes flashed viciously.

How dare he?

He raised the stake and Lydia screamed.

“Wait! You can’t!”

Spike drew in an unneeded breath as the stake plunged downwards.

***

Buffy had been sitting in the magic shop waiting for Spike and Travers’ team to show up since the sun set. It was still early but she knew Spike would have headed straight here and she was getting antsy. She started jiggling her leg up and down casting glances towards the front door every few seconds.

“Um, Buffy? Are you okay?”

Buffy looked over at Willow sitting opposite her and then noticed all the Scoobies staring at her, worried frowns on their faces.

“I’m fine. Fine. Peachy and keen. Why?” she asked, plastering a fake smile on her face.

“Well it’s just…you seem kinda…”

“Jumpy? Anxious? Ready to hop off your seat and go flying out the door?” Xander supplied.

“Well, um, yeah. That.”

“Oh. No I’m…”

“Fine?” Giles asked, staring at her leg that was still bobbing up and down.

Buffy stilled, the Watchers were beginning to cast looks in her direction now too.

“I guess I’m just itching for a fight or something. Stress from the last couple of days getting to me. It’s no big deal really, I…”

She stopped suddenly, looking over at the door again, this time staring at it intently.

“Buffy?”

“Something’s wrong.”

She couldn’t explain it but she was sure she had felt that tingle telling her Spike was close but it was distant and not getting any stronger. Some instinct was warning her of danger, telling her to get outside now.

“Buffy, what…?”

Buffy tore out the door, leaving them all staring after her as the bell jingled as she left. She was racing down the street and spotted Lydia and the other two Watchers surrounded by men, army men.

Oh no. No, no, no.

She spotted them. Spike was lying on the ground, Riley kneeling over him, stake raised. Lydia screamed at him to stop as he brought the stake down and Buffy launched herself at him.

She barrelled into him and they went tumbling on the ground, the stake flying through the air and landing with a clatter on the pavement.

Buffy wasted no time springing to her feet and caught Riley with a kick to the chest as he was standing up, sending him soaring backwards and hitting the ground hard.

The other soldiers attacked and Buffy whirled into action. Her heart was beating fast and her adrenaline was pumping through her system. Fear from seeing Spike almost dusted and rage at the military still in her town going after her vampire fuelling it. She had them incapacitated in seconds.

Spike hauled himself up off the ground shakily and she rushed over to help him. The Council members were dazed and stared around at the unconscious soldiers. One was still moving and he got slowly to his feet.

Buffy had an arm around Spike and the vamp was bent over, still sore from the tazer shot. The others had rushed out of the Magic Box and were looking a bit bewildered by everything. Xander noticed the pale, shaky looking soldier that was still standing, his eyes fixed on the blonde couple in front of him.

“Riley?”

The other Scoobies were staring too. Matching looks of disbelief on their faces. Buffy scowled at him and kept her arm protectively around Spike. Her voice was cold when she spoke. Pure Slayer and her friends turned frightened and confused eyes on her as she addressed her ex-boyfriend.

“What are you doing here? I thought you were leaving. This is my town and soldiers aren’t welcome.”

“Yeah, you just prefer to hang out with demons and monsters. You don’t own the town Buffy, I’m in charge of a team guarding the Hellmouth and what I’m doing here is finishing what should never have started and tying up the last loose end from the Initiative.”

“Guarding the Hellmouth? Please if you were doing that I wouldn’t have my hands full with Glory and Knights of Byzantium and everything else that runs around this town at night. Or maybe I would only you’d all be dead already. Get out of Sunnydale, hell out of California, even out of the States altogether, just get far away from me or so help me I will change that rule I have about not Slaying humans.”

Her friends all gasped. They never thought they’d hear her talk like that. Xander was really confused.

“Hey now, I know you two didn’t leave things on the best of terms and seeing the soldiers again is unwelcome but lets not get nasty and psychotic here.”

Buffy kept her eyes fixed on Riley and her arm around Spike who was now fully standing and also glaring at the soldier.

“He tried to stake Spike.”

“Uh huh, and I get that he’s sort of one of the team now but the reason you’d get all deranged over that would be what exactly? It’s just Spike Buff, he should have been dust a long time ago.”

The look she shot him had Xander stumbling back a few steps, his eyes wide with fright. He moved a little behind Anya who was staring from Buffy to Riley to Spike and understanding seemed to dawn on her face, her eyes popping open in amazement. Tara also appeared to have figured it out and was a little shocked but focused her attention on Willow and the others who were still oblivious to the reason Buffy was suddenly so scarily protective of the Brit.

“I don’t understand. Buffy what’s going on, why are you…?” Willow stumbled but Riley cut her off.

“Because she’s doing the vampire. Her and that thing are together. I knew he was after you but I didn’t believe you’d ever sink that low, even after Angel. He doesn’t have a soul. You’re just a sick, twisted girl who gets off on sleeping with dead guys huh? Even Dracula had more class than him. Guess they don’t need a thrall do they? You’re happy enough to just jump them.”

Spike growled viciously but Buffy tightened her grip on his arm. The chip wouldn’t keep him from trying to hurt Riley even if the pain would set in before he could do anything. She didn’t want him getting hurt. She thought at this minute, if the chip wasn’t a factor she might just have let him attack.

“Get out of here. Leave and never let me see you again. You have to the count of five before I make sure I never have to deal with you again. One, Two, Three…”

Riley threw another nasty look in their direction before turning and walking off, leaving his team behind on the ground. Buffy waited until he was out of sight before facing her friends. They were all staring at her. Tara and Anya were shifting around uncomfortably and watching Willow and Xander.

Xander was dumbfounded and Willow didn’t seem to know what to do. She was doing a pretty good impersonation of a fish right now. Giles was standing perfectly still, his lips pursed tight, staring fixedly at the Slayer and vampire, not a hint of emotion on his face. Travers stepped forward. He seemed perfectly at ease with the situation and Buffy could practically feel the glee emanating from him.

“I think it’s time we called an end to this evaluation. Miss Summers, if you’d care to join us inside. Mr.Giles, you too.”

He turned and headed back into the shop, his team following. Buffy looked at Giles, her heart sinking as he still refused to show any emotion before he turned and followed Travers back into the shop. Spike placed an arm around Buffy’s waist, hugging her to him. He knew how much she was hurting seeing her surrogate father walk away from her like that and he wished he didn’t have the chip so he could beat some sense into the man and make him at least talk to her.

The others were still standing there gaping at her and Buffy didn’t know what she should do. Xander eventually broke the silence as shock was replaced by amazement and disgust.

“You’re sleeping with Spike?!”

Chapter 17

Buffy took in the expressions on her friends faces as they each gaped at her. The look of disgust Xander was shooting at her and Spike was making her angry but faced with the obvious disapproval and horror of the people she loved and considered family hurt her and she couldn’t bring herself to speak. She knew it would be bad when they found out and she had wanted a chance to explain it to them and get them used to the idea first, not have it dropped on them like this.

“No. No, tell me it’s not true. It can’t be true. Buff?”

Spike scowled at the whelp. Buffy’s silence was worrying him. He knew she was upset by the current situation but she needed to start talking before the full onslaught began. She told him she didn’t want them to be a secret forever and she wanted to be with him but her reaction to her friends right now wasn’t very reassuring. He stayed by her side, however, waiting for her to respond. If she didn’t start talking soon he was gonna end up saying something to the Scoobies she wouldn’t appreciate.

“Buffy, is it…was what Riley said true? Are you and Spike…?” Willow questioned.

Buffy looked at her friend and opened her mouth to speak but no sound would come out. Xander interrupted, still in full denial mode.

“Of course it isn’t true. Buffy would never give Captain Peroxide there the time of day, it’s just some crazy mistake, some wild accusation Riley made because he was pissed off, that’s all.”

Xander looked at Buffy hopefully but she knew he didn’t really believe what he was saying himself. How could he when she was acting the way she was? Spike growled and made to step forward. He was getting pissed off. The sound of Buffy’s voice stopped him.

“It’s true Xand. Everyone…I’m…me and Spike…we’re…together.”

Anya and Tara waited for the knowledge to sink in with Xander and Willow. Xander was taken aback and stared at the pavement as though everything he’d ever known about the way the world worked had just been proven a lie while Willow’s expression changed from confusion to hurt.

“Why didn’t you say anything? Why didn’t you tell me? Buffy I thought we were best friends, how could you hide this from me?”

The disappointment and hurt in Willow’s face made Buffy’s eyes well up and her voice caught in her throat.

Mom was right. The longer this was a secret the more hurt they’d be when they found out. I wasn’t even the one that told them and now Willow feels betrayed because I’ve been lying to them. Maybe she would have understood if I’d given her the chance. Everything’s all messed up.

Spike couldn’t keep his mouth shut any longer. He knew Buffy was putting all the blame on herself, allowing them to turn her into a villain for something they had no right judging her for.

“Maybe if she didn’ think you’d all jump down her throat like this and instantly assume there was somethin’ wrong with it she would have.”

“Oh no, you, you don’t get to talk now, and this, this is wrong, way wrong. Besides the fact you’re a vampire, you don’t have a soul and if it wasn’t for that chip you’d still be trying to kill us all right now.”

“You don’ shut your mouth I might just beat you through the pain whelp.”

“Oh yeah, a perfect example of why you and Buffy should be together. Have you completely lost your mind Buff? This is Spike!”

Spike was just about ready to punch the brunette but Willow stepped in again.

“What did you do?”

“What d’you mean what did I do?”

“To Buffy. You must have done something to her to make her act this way, to be with you…a spell or…something.”

“I didn’ use any soddin’ spell, she chose to be with me on her own, you know I hate magic, can’ trust it.”

“Oh yeah, what about when you kidnapped me and Xander to use that love spell to get Dru back?”

“I didn’ go through with it after did I? I don’ like spells an’ I wouldn’ want her like that. I love her the way she is an’ I’d never change her.”

Willow stared at him, her eyes widening at the word love. Tara stepped forward and took her girlfriend’s arm. She understood how they felt about this and she never would have thought of Buffy and Spike becoming an item but Buffy was looking a little bewildered right now and she didn’t think they should be ganging up on her, besides which, Spike meant what he said and Buffy still hadn’t moved away from him. Would it really be so wrong for them to be together?

“You love her?”

“That’s impossible. You can’t love without a soul, not really.”

Spike ignored Xander and looked Willow straight in the eye.

“I do. Soul or no bloody soul,” he looked pointedly at Xander, “I love her.”

Xander started giggling crazily and threw his hands up in the air. He started pacing around in circles.

“Oh this is just great.”

Willow refused to believe Buffy would have just decided to start dating Spike all of a sudden, especially without confiding in her. Not of her own volition. She looked at the quiet blonde staring at the ground.

“Buffy. Why would you just…change your mind about him? Why would you hide it if you really wanted him, if you didn’t think it was wrong?”

“Red, I jus’ told you…”

“I…I didn’t want…with the Council here…”

Tears were starting to flow down her cheeks and she took a shaky breath before starting again.

“Spike didn’t do anything. It was my decision to be with him. I didn’t tell you because I knew how you’d react and I just wanted…”

“You wanted to keep it from us because you knew how sick it was? You knew what we’d say so you wanted to keep it your dirty little secret right? Well cat’s out of the bag so why don’t you explain it to us? Explain to me how you ended up with him.”

“Xander! That’s not what I meant! I wanted to get through this Council visit without this breakdown once you guys knew. I was going to tell you once they left.”

“Sure you were. Guess you don’t have to worry about that now right? You knew this was wrong or you wouldn’t have hidden it. The Council certainly won’t see it as part of being a good Vampire Slayer. Guess you should just drop the ‘S’ off that title. Two vamps Buff? Riley was right, I never thought you’d sink that low.”

Buffy gasped. She knew Xander had a prejudice against vamps but to say such hurtful things to her was something she‘d never anticipated. Spike had had enough. He punched Xander in the face and sent him sprawling on the pavement. Spike shouted and grabbed his head but shook it off and headed for Xander again. The others backed away with fear in their eyes.

“Spike no, don’t!”

“He has no right to talk to you like that.”

“Stop, don’t fight him, it won’t help. Spike please.”

She grabbed his arm and hauled him back, she had to struggle to restrain him, his eyes flashing yellow.

“Spike, vamping out will not help right now.”

Xander sat up, holding his bleeding nose and Anya dropped to her knees beside him helping him up.

“Why not? Ashamed to see the monster your sleeping with? Let the demon out Buff, show us your boyfriend’s true face if you really think it shouldn’t matter what he is.”

Spike struggled to break free of her hold again, going into full game face.

“God will you all just stop please! Stop fighting! I want to explain but you won’t give me a chance. I just…I can’t…I can’t do this…please…”

She burst into tears. How could she explain it to them when they refused to listen. The looks on their faces made it impossible to face them. The people she’d shared so much with were looking at her like she was some stranger, like she was wrong. All of them except Giles.

He doesn’t even want to look at me.

Spike saw her break down and instantly regretted his actions. The boy wasn’t worth this. He slipped back into his human features and put his arms around her, pulling the shaking girl to him but she wasn’t responding. She just kept her eyes squeezed shut with her hands over her face and cried.

“I can’t watch this.”

“Xander!” Willow called but he ignored her, walking off with Anya following in his wake, looking back over her shoulder apologetically.

“Buffy, pet? C’mon luv, look at me. I won’t fight them anymore all right? Xander left. Please Buffy, don’t cry kitten.”

Willow watched as Spike tried his best to comfort her friend. She couldn’t understand it. He wasn’t acting at all like the Spike she knew, but Buffy wasn’t acting like herself either. She was still hurt Buffy hadn’t told her but the way things were going so far she guessed she couldn’t blame her for not jumping in to tell them. The stuff Xander had said to her and even the way she had reacted was making her feel bad as she watched one of her best friends fall to pieces.

“Willow? I think, m..m..maybe we should go? I think everyone needs to c..c..calm down a bit and the Watchers are waiting for Buffy.”

Willow looked at her girlfriend’s concerned face and then back at Buffy and Spike. She didn’t want to leave things like this but Tara was probably right. Everyone needed to calm down and soon Travers would be looking for the Slayer. Maybe it was best if they just left. Fighting and standing there looking disappointed wouldn’t help anyone, especially Buffy. They could talk tomorrow.

“Okay. Buffy we’re leaving okay? We can talk tomorrow, please, I…I don’t want you to think I hate you or anything…I just, think it’s better we talk tomorrow alright?”

Buffy was too busy crying her eyes out into Spike’s shirt to answer. The vampire looked at Willow, stern but not threatening.

“Fine. It is prob’ly best you lot go home. Talk tomorrow but you better damn well give her a chance to talk, not that she needs to explain herself to all of you hypocrites.”

Willow wanted to ask just what he meant by that but Tara pulled her away.

“Leave it please? Tomorrow. We can sort it out tomorrow.”

“Okay. Bye Buffy.”

The wiccans left and Spike turned his attention back to the crying Slayer.

“Buffy? They’re gone now okay? Pet please talk to me.”

When her cries turned to sobs she raised her head up to meet concerned blue eyes. Her own were red-rimmed and her face was puffy, her throat hurt from crying ad her voice was croaky when she spoke.

“I n..n..never w..w..wanted them to f..f..find out like t..that. I knew it w..would be a p..p..problem but I n..never expected…”

Spike ached for her. She was tortured from the way her friends treated her and he couldn’t think what he could do to make it better.

“Let them sleep on it yeah? The whelp…he needs a right arse kicking but demon girl didn’ seem to mind, maybe she can straighten him out a bit, an’ Tara has Red considerin’ it. She was upset yeah, but she looks like she might change her mind. Everyone jus’ needs to calm down a bit an’ let it sink in is all.”

Buffy shook her head, struggling to hold back another wave of tears.

“No they won’t. They, c..can’t accept it. After Angel…they w..won’t understand Spike. You don’t have a soul.”

“An’ what does that mean exactly? To have a soul? What’s so bloody fantastic ‘bout havin’ one o’ those? Angel has a soul an’ he’s a broody, whiny useless excuse for an immortal. Your friends have souls but they certainly didn’ have a problem tearin’ into you because you did something’ they didn’ agree with. Soldier boy’s got a soul an’ he hunts down an’ kills harmless demons. Murderers, rapists, all the bloody criminals in the world got soddin’ souls an’ are they any bleedin’ better for it?”

Buffy gaped at him. He was pacing now and seemed really angry. She didn’t understand why he’d suddenly turned from trying to comfort her to looking like he wanted to strangle her.

“Spike…what…?”

“I’m tryin’ Buffy. I don’ have a soul but it doesn’ mean I can’t love. Yeah the chip’s been the only thing holdin’ me back an’ makin’ me work with you lot as long as I have but you know that changed when I fell in love with you. I wanna be good for you Buffy. I’ve been doin’ everythin’ I could think of an’ it never seemed like enough, not until you gave me a chance. That was the happiest moment of my life, an’ unlife, but I’m startin’ to wonder if you even meant it.”

“What? Spike how can you ask me that? Of course I meant it.”

“Did you? Cos gotta say luv, the way you keep yammerin’ on ‘bout my obvious lack of a soul’s not doin’ much for my self esteem. I know why you didn’ want your pals to find out while the Wankers were here but they did, couldn’ be helped, but I never thought you’d freeze up like that. You couldn’ even answer ‘em Buffy. If I hadn’ been here threatenin’ them would you have even bothered or jus’ sat there an’ taken it?”

“Spike why are you being like this? You know I don’t care that you don’t have a soul, if I did I wouldn’t have been with you all this time. You proved to me you changed and I accepted it. I just had a huge fight with my friends and you’re jumping down my throat because I wasn’t prepared enough for that onslaught?”

“You weren’ fightin’ Buffy. To do that you’d actually have to stand up for yourself. You let them overrule you like you always do. Their approval is all that matters an’ if you don’ get it then it’s all your fault. You’re the Slayer for cryin’ out loud. You don’ have to answer to anyone. The Watchers, your friends, you’re the one in charge, the Chosen One, the Slayer, but you never bloody act like it. Not until someone you love is in danger, otherwise you just sit there an’ do as you’re told and shoulder the blame when things don’ go the way you planned. Bloody hell Buffy jus’ be the woman you can be, the woman you are an’ stop lettin’ others control you.”

“How can you say that to me? I am doing the best I can. I chose to be with you. I care about you and you told me you love me but you’re turning on me just like them. You told Willow you never wanted to change me but you just said I should be different. You want the Slayer Spike, that’s all. You don’t want Buffy, the girl, she’s too sensitive for you. I can’t deal with the people I love hating me and you turn on me for it. All you want is the Warrior, the fighter, the girl who beat you down, your match. I’m more than that, I’m a girl too and I can’t help being vulnerable sometimes. God, why does this keep happening to me? I thought you were different. Angel and Riley, they wanted plain defenceless Buffy. You, you saw me, at least I thought you did, but I was wrong. You just saw the Slayer. Am I ever going to find anyone who wants me for both?”

“I do want you for both. They’re the same girl Buffy you just insist on seperatin’ ‘em.”

“I am the way I am Spike. I’m trying to live my fucked up life the best way I can. I’m sorry if that isn’t enough for you.”

Spike was getting more pissed off by the minute.

“Why won’ you listen to me? I’m tryin’ to prove somethin’ to you here an’ you jus’ insist on fightin’ me over it.”

Buffy felt anger flood through her. She held onto it for dear life just to keep the overwhelming urge to dissolve into tears at bay.

“Are you even listening to yourself right now? You just told me I don’t ever fight for myself but now I’m too busy fighting you to hear you out? Did you ever think the reason I’m so clearly screwed up is because no one around me can make their minds up?”

Spike growled in frustration. His anger was building and he cursed the chip for ever forcing him into a situation like this. He just wanted to beat sense into everyone around him sometimes and couldn’t.

“I’m the only one you ever seem to bloody want to fight with. You know what Buffy, or Slayer, since that’s all of you I can see, maybe they aren’ the only ones that need to take a break from this. Maybe it’s best we jus’ put some distance between us before you decide you’ve had enough an’ take that mountain of frustration out on me again like you always do. Forgive me if I don’ fancy a round of kick the Spike right now but I’ve heard about enough for one night. If you decide to get off that high horse of yours an’ see some bloody sense you know where I’ll be.”

With a final glare Spike whirled around and stalked off back in the direction of Restfield. Buffy was gob smacked.

He’s just going to walk away? Spike is leaving me here? After everything that just happened, he’s leaving?

“Spike! Spike you can’t just walk off like that. Damn it, Spike!”

He ignored her and continued walking. Buffy cursed and started to follow when an unusually calm voice called her name and she spun to see Travers looking at her from around the Magic Box’s door.

“Miss Summers if you’re quite through out here we do have the little matter of your evaluation to discuss. I’m sure you don’t want to keep Mr. Giles waiting any longer do you?”

Buffy wanted to pound his stuck up horrible face into the pavement when something he said struck a chord with her.

Giles. He’s in there, waiting for me. He could be…

Giving in, Buffy threw a last wistful look in Spike’s direction before heading in to face the music. She knew it wouldn’t be good. It would be a horrible end to a horrible night.

***

Inside all the Watchers were gathered around, surrounding her. Travers stood in the middle of the circle facing her. Lydia was behind him. Giles was standing against the wall to the left. Buffy tried to catch his eye but he purposefully avoided looking at her, staring instead at Travers, that same blank look on his face. Buffy felt the lump in her throat growing and switched her focus to Travers.

“Okay then,” she croaked, “let’s hear it.”

Travers smirked at her but she didn’t care. All the rage was gone out of her. She just felt…empty.

“Well let’s review shall we? First the interviews. Your mother and sister have had quite the time of it haven’t they? With a Slayer in the house they’ve had their lives in danger a lot and I believe they had a situation when you decided to run away once correct?”

Buffy didn’t answer. They had all the information they wanted. He continued.

“Your friends too have had their lives changed. The witches experimenting with magic, some if not most of which has gone wrong to my understanding. The foolishness of said friends and lack of respect for the dark arts and demon summonings has caused many disturbances in the past.”

Buffy just watched as he listed off every negative he could think of.

“The vampire,” he paused significantly, hoping for a reaction, Buffy just continued to stare at him, waiting for him to continue, “he’s an interesting creature certainly. Had many good things to say about you as a fighter, the only one he met that survived his attacks. He did, however, mention how much you rely on your friends and Mr. Giles for help. Seemed to think you could do it on your own and be a much better Slayer if you weren’t conditioned by the Council for so long to believe you had to do as you were told, follow orders. Said that you listened to other people too much to become the best, even if you have lasted this long.”

Buffy swallowed hard. Talk about rubbing salt in the wound. Spike said almost the exact same thing to her outside. He’d been backing her up but still he’d told the Watchers she was holding back from being a proper Slayer.

“Next your skills as a Slayer. You have been following none of the traditional techniques and as far as training goes are by far the worst I’ve ever tested. You do have your own unique style which, admittedly, seems to serve you quite well in the field. Of course you have the uncanny ability to let your enemies get much closer than should be necessary and it is my firm belief that had the vampire not turned up in that fight with the demon you would be dead by now.”

He paused and waited for her to meet his gaze for a few tense seconds before he continued slowly.

“Despite everything I’ve seen that proves to me you are incapable of performing your duties as a champion for the powers the fact remains that you are one of the longest living Slayers on record. Your friends and family seem to think that even though some situations get rather heated and it has been touch and go many times in your big battles you always pull through, and for a young girl who has died once to save the world you have faced many seemingly impossible situations at million to one odds and come out of them the victor. They each assured us that if anyone was capable of putting a stop to Glory it would be you, Buffy Summers.”

Buffy didn’t think she could take any more. He was taking everything that meant so much to her, that would have filled her with such hope previously, and shoving it back in her face. She glanced at Giles again but he remained stony faced. She wanted to scream at him, make him talk to her. Shout, lecture, anything. Anything but this constant silence and refusal to even acknowledge her.

“However, I cannot help but wonder if that is still the case. Do you suppose they would say the same thing now that they know you have become involved with another vampire, one who has tried to kill each of you several times and has only ceased his evil plans because the military put a leash on him? A Slayer and a vampire. You’ve been through this before have you not Miss Summers, although I seem to remember the last one at the very least possessing a soul. Somehow I doubt you have quite the fan club you had before tonight, wouldn’t you say Mr. Giles?”

Giles didn’t answer.

“I’m afraid I cannot allow the information I possess to fall into such incapable hands. I had initially intended to have you re-schooled as a Slayer but now I see that would be futile. You are too far removed from the ways of the Council and we cannot have anything further to do with a Slayer who throws in her lot with vampires, repeatedly. As such I am leaving with my team on the next available flight. Mr. Giles, you will be returning with us. I would like all of you including your fellow team members here tomorrow for a final meeting where I will have made my decision about who we’ll be sending to control the Hellmouth as your replacement. At the very least they should be here to bid your mentor farewell, if they have any respect for the man.”

With that Travers and his team began to file out of the shop, leaving Buffy shell-shocked. She couldn’t believe this was happening. Giles moved from his spot by the wall and headed towards the register.

“Giles. You can’t leave. We have to do something. Giles please, talk to me, look at me. Giles!”

He completely ignored her. Buffy ran over to him and grabbed his sleeve.

“Giles, please, say something to me! We have to talk about this!”

“There’s nothing to talk about. I’m being deported. I’ll see you at the meeting tomorrow.”

Buffy sobbed and watched as he shrugged his arm free from her.

“Giles!”

“Buffy! I have to close up the shop and prepare things for Anya before I have to leave. Please just go.”

He stared solidly at the counter. Buffy didn’t know what to do. He wouldn’t talk to her, wouldn’t look at her. She relented.

“Fine I’ll go. Please just…try talk to me tomorrow. I don’t want to leave things like this. Giles?”

He began looking through his books and Buffy gave up. She left the shop and walked home in a daze, everything that had happened tonight replaying in her mind, as if it had happened to someone else.

***

When she got home she walked through the door and closed it quietly behind her, then she just stood in the hallway unmoving. Joyce walked in and stopped when she saw her eldest daughter.

“Buffy? I thought I heard the door. Buffy, sweetie what is it? What happened?”

Buffy looked at her mother and fell apart. She ran into Joyce’s arms and broke down in tears. Joyce held her trembling body closely in shock. She’d never seen Buffy get this upset since she became the Slayer.

“Buffy, what is it?”

“Oh Mom. Everything’s gone so wrong.”

“Oh honey…”

Buffy fell to her knees and Joyce dropped down beside her, cradling her in her arms. Something was seriously wrong. Dawn walked in from the living room having heard her sister’s cries and stood dumbfounded as she watched their Mom try to soothe the nervous wreck that was her sister on the floor. Wordlessly she joined them and hugged her sister, sharing a look of concern with Joyce.

Chapter 18

Buffy woke up praying that last night was nothing more than a bad dream. Her sore throat and red eyes informed her that she had no such luck. She’d managed to cry herself to sleep a few hours ago after convincing her Mom and Dawn she would be okay and they should just get some rest. Thinking about last night and how she’d spilled her heart out to her Mom about everything that had happened was making her chest hurt so she decided to push those thoughts away and focus on the mundane everyday tasks of getting up and preparing for the day ahead. She could barely look at her reflection. She looked terrible, and even after tidying herself up she couldn’t erase that tired, almost ill looking appearance she was sporting. She didn’t really feel like caring right now anyway.

She could smell breakfast as she made her way downstairs and walked into the kitchen to find her Mom and Dawn sitting at the island, yawning over their orange juice.

“Hey,” she croaked, “sorry I kept you guys up so late last night. You both look exhausted.”

“That’s okay honey. I’m always ready to listen to my girls and I was needed last night. I can catch up on any missed sleep this afternoon since I won’t be doing anything else. It will do me some good to get away from daytime t.v. for a while too.”

“Yeah it’s okay for you, I have school to go to. On second thought I guess it gives me a reason to catch some z’s in class.”

Joyce gave her youngest a stern look of disapproval.

“I was kidding. Jeez. I’m not actually going to fall asleep in class…probably.”

“Go get your stuff. Janice and her Mom will be here to pick you up soon.”

“Yeah yeah. Um Buffy? Are you, y’know, okay?”

Buffy gave her sister a small smile. Dawn had steadfastly refused to leave her and their Mom alone last night, wanting to know exactly what could have caused Buffy to break down. Buffy told her Mom it was okay, Dawn could stay. Everyone else knew, why not her sister too? So she’d told the story after Joyce had explained that Buffy and Spike were a couple but had wanted to keep it secret until the Council were gone and Buffy could find a way to break the news to the others. Dawn’s eyes had popped at the news and grown even wider upon discovering that the only person Buffy had told had been their Mom, the one person she used to hide everything from. She had seemed almost ecstatic that Spike and her sister were dating but her excitement soon diminished when Buffy relayed the events of Riley’s sudden reappearance and the subsequent disaster with the Scoobies.

“I’m okay Dawn, really. I’m all cried out. I’m just going to spend the day resting and get ready for the big meeting tonight, or the big goodbye, that is, if anyone bothers to show up. Wow, check out my skills at depressing everyone first thing in the morning. Forget the last part, I’m fine. Go get ready for school, I’ll see you later okay?”

“Okay. It will be alright sis. I’m not sure how right now, but things usually work themselves out, and don’t worry about Spike. There’s no way he can stay mad at you forever and he definitely won’t keep his distance for too long.”

Buffy thought about the day he’d gone off her radar, before they were even dating, and how it had made her crazy with worry. She just prayed he wouldn’t do that again, especially since he was so mad at her. She didn’t think she could bare it if he didn’t show up soon.

“I sure hope not. Bye Dawn, have a good day.”

“Bye. Bye Mom. Love you.”

“Bye honey,” Joyce called as her teenage daughter left the house, leaving her with a very unhappy Buffy.

“She’s right you know. He won’t stay away long.”

“I just really didn’t expect that from him Mom. One minute he’s there for me, telling me it’s not so bad and the next he’s on my back about sticking up for myself. I was upset and unprepared and it wasn’t enough for him. I thought he really understood me. Understood that there’s two sides to me but I guess I was just so happy a guy accepted my Slayer side that I never realised he didn’t see the girl. It’s the same mistake I’ve always made but in reverse.”

Joyce frowned and reached a hand over the counter to grab Buffy’s, making her look up at her.

“Honey I’ve heard this twice now. Once last night and just now and I still don’t understand it. You’re twisting what he meant. You’re so confused by having your friends turn on you that you’re taking what he said the wrong way. It’s no wonder he stormed off like he did, or that he got so mad. If I’d have been there I would have backed him up, he was right.”

Buffy stared at her mother in shock. She was taking his side? What was going on?

Spike was right? She’d back him up? Has Mom turned on me too, what the hell?

“What do you mean he was right? You think I should have handled it better? Did I not just say what sort of horrible, hurtful things my friends threw in my face last night? How was I supposed to deal with that?”

“Honey, listen to me, I’m on your side and so was Spike, that’s my point. Yes, okay, he could have made his point better instead of getting angry and yelling at you but your friends got to him too. He wouldn’t show it of course but everything they said that would have hurt you, hurt him too, especially seeing how much it upset you. Spike is…different, we’re agreed on that, and yes, he was someone you found it hard to trust because of the…questionable things he’s done but he has tried and you gave him a chance which would have meant more to him than anything. He’s always been an outsider even though he’s done his best lately to fit in with the group. When you said he’d never be accepted because he didn’t have a soul, even though I know that doesn’t bother you and deep down he knows that too, it would have hurt because it would have reminded him of how he’ll always be the outsider, that maybe they won’t accept him and that will make you change your mind about being with him. So he did the exact same thing you did when you got into that fight and used anger to defend yourself because you were hurt. You both have a lot in common and in this case, you both got defensive and it escalated until neither one of you would listen to reason and he probably decided it was just better to leave before things got worse. I have to say I really didn’t expect him to be the sensible one in this relationship but there he goes with his surprises again.”

Buffy took all this in. She fought the urge to interrupt and defend herself and just hear her mother out instead. She realised Joyce was right. It was just like Spike to protect himself by getting mad, just like she did. The problem was she only did that with him. She was beginning to see where her Mom, and Spike, were coming from.

“So yes, he was mad and he was upset and hurt but he was still making sense. Sweetie he wasn’t just looking at you as the Slayer. He wanted you to defend yourself like he knows you could. You’re the one in charge around here but you’re miserable doing everything the Council wants because of some silly test. They aren’t going to be able to do anything about Glory without you, despite what you think and this punishment is a way to make you suffer so you’ll obey them from now on. Those rats just want to feel important and they’re annoyed because you’re the first Slayer who hasn’t sat back and done what she’s told.

Yup, her Mom was definitely making sense and Buffy was beginning to pay attention to everything Spike had told her last night, reconsidering what he meant until she realised he had made a lot of valid points. Her friends’ approval did mean a lot to her and she hadn’t ever been able to stand up to them before. Spike was the only one she could fight with and she was regretting not listening to him. Now he was out there somewhere angry with her and thinking she was mad at him and going to let her friends tell her what to do, which would mean breaking up with him.

And that is so not happening. Spike is the one good thing that’s happened to me lately besides Mom getting better and I’m not going to let him go because of their prejudice against vampires, which, justified? Yes, but not with him, not now. He’s different and they have to see that, or I guess they really aren’t the people I thought they were.

“You’re right. You both are. Oh God, Spike…I’ve really messed this up haven’t I?

Joyce gave her daughter’s hand a reassuring pat and smiled at her.

“Not yet you haven’t. You have plenty of time to bring them around, or at least try to, and Spike shouldn’t be too hard to find. He loves you Buffy, he’s not going to leave because you had a silly fight. You can still apologise and make it up to him and as for the Council, you have a meeting with them today right?”

“Yeah, one I was not looking forward to. Giles’ bon voyage party. But I can stop that. I need time to compose myself, get rid of this beaten down little girl look and get back to Slayer mode and find some way to sort this out, starting with getting everyone at that meeting tonight. If I’m going to stand up for myself I might as well start with everyone all at once.”

“That’s the strong young woman I raised. You’ve made more sacrifices than you ever should have had to, to save the world and protect the people around you. It’s about time you fought for what you want.”

“Thanks Mom. I don’t know what I’d do without you, and I still can’t get over the fact that you approve of Spike and defend him.”

“Well to be honest, I really wasn’t happy about it at first but you’ve been so much happier lately. I think I even heard you singing in the shower once. He’s good for you and even if I didn’t like him I don’t think I could argue with his reasoning. He makes a lot of sense. He really does see you for who you are. You deserve that.”

Buffy and her Mom chatted for a while over breakfast and then settled down in front of the television before Buffy felt up to showering and putting some effort into her appearance. When she’d made herself look reasonably like her normal, peppy self she braced herself for the hard part, convincing her friends to come to the meeting tonight. She knew Giles would be there, which was a relief because she was not ready to face him yet. Xander would be the most difficult and she had moved on to being pissed off about the things he’d said to her so she decided to wait awhile before paying him a visit and start with Willow instead. She had seemed the most likely to hear her out, especially if Tara was around and Buffy hoped their biggest problem was keeping a secret from her best friend which she could hopefully explain without too much trouble.

Okay. It’s now or never. Come on Buffy you can do this.

“Okay Mom, I’m going. I’ll see you at dinner.”

“Alright honey,” her Mom’s voice called, “good luck.”

I’ll definitely need it, Buffy thought as she made her way out the door.

***

Knocking lightly on the door of Willow’s dorm room Buffy replayed what she intended to say over and over in her head, praying she’d have the strength to get it out in the open and not back down this time. She was getting anxious when the door finally opened and Willow was standing in front of her.

“Buffy. Um, hi. I wasn’t expecting you. Um, you wanna…come in?”

“Yeah, thanks Will.”

Buffy stepped past her friend and spotted Tara sitting on the bed, glancing up with some surprise at her.

“Buffy. Hi, um, I should probably go, give you two time to talk and…”

“Oh no, that’s okay you can stay, really. I…have some things I wanna say and I have to ask you both something after. What I want to talk about…you should both hear it.”

“O..okay.”

“Um, yeah, sure. I think we do need to talk. You look…better, today.”

Not the snivelling mess when you guys left last night? Yeah, you wouldn’t believe the effort that’s taken.

“Yeah, I, uh, I had a lot of thinking to do and last night…well I was less prepared for that than you guys were and I was a mess but I’m ready to talk about it now.”

“Buffy…”

“No. No Will, both of you, just…please, hear me out first? You can say what you want when I’m done okay?”

Willow looked about ready to say something but Tara’s hand on her arm stopped her and she just nodded. Buffy gave Tara a grateful smile. She was really glad the shy girl was here to back her up. She started pacing up and down while the wiccans sat on the bed waiting for her to begin. She twisted her hands together and took a deep breath before facing them and saying what she came here to say.

“Okay, so, to start with something I should have told you before…Spike and I are a couple.”

She took in her friends faces. They just nodded and waited for her to continue.

“We only got together just before the Council came and since I was really only getting my head around it myself and dealing with the Watchers I decided to keep us a secret until after they left. Fact is, I knew you guys wouldn’t like it, heck I fought it at first too but I realised some things about him. He’s been changing. Since the chip he’s needed to do what we wanted because he was helpless but lately he’s done a lot of things that we didn’t even know about for good. He even turned down opportunities he’s had to kill us in favour of helping. Case in point, Giles being turned into a Fyarl demon, something Spike could kill. This stupid test of the Watchers…” Buffy let out a huge sigh, “I knew I’d instantly fail if they found out, not to mention the danger it would have put Spike in, yet another reason to keep it secret.”

Willow was about to interrupt before Buffy raised a hand to stop her.

“Just let me finish here. Bottom line is I have feelings for Spike. Strong, mushy, good feelings that I have no intention giving up. So what I’m saying is, whether you approve or not I’m going to keep seeing him. He’s my boyfriend and I just hope that you can learn to accept that. I know I hurt you by hiding it but I really didn’t think I had a choice. I was going to tell you though, please believe that. I want you to be okay with this, even though I know it’s gonna take time. Probably a lot of time. Okay, that’s it.”

Buffy spread her hands out and shrugged, waiting for them to say whatever they wanted to say. Tara smiled at her and patted Willow’s hand. The redhead drew in a deep breath and stood to face Buffy.

“I overreacted last night. Thing is, I did a lot of thinking after we got home and talked some stuff through with Tara and I get it now, why you couldn’t tell us. I was a little upset and shocked and hurt when it all came out but I realise we just sorta jumped down your throat without giving you a chance to defend yourself. Of course I can understand why you kept it secret even though I don’t like that you didn’t confide in me…but I get that too, after what Xander said…”

Willow trailed off and Buffy looked away. She really didn’t want to think about that.

“Spike said something last night that made me think.”

Buffy looked up worriedly. That couldn’t possibly be good, could it?

“He said you shouldn’t have to explain yourself to us hypocrites. I didn’t get what he meant at first but we would have just got into an argument if I asked. I thought about it and I think I understand it now, and he’s right. We are hypocrites.”

Buffy couldn’t even blink. So now Willow was saying Spike was right. She hadn’t slipped into some crazy alternate dimension had she?

“Huh?”

“Well, think about it. Not exactly the poster child for conventional relationships here. We’ve always been with unusual partners. I mean c’mon Buffy, Xander’s dating an ex-vengeance demon, he’d put emphasis on the ex of course but still, we all know Anya still has trouble with the moral stuff, and me? Dated a werewolf. Did the whole creature of the night thing and Oz didn’t have control of his demon like Spike does. Also me and Tara…” Willow turned to her girlfriend who stood and came over to stand beside her smiling, “I kept us a secret for a while too because I was scared of what you guys would think. I guess what I’m saying is I know what you’re going through. Admittedly I would never have thought you and Spike would…well it was a surprise and I’m still not quite sure I can understand it but we have plenty of time to talk about it now, right?”

Buffy couldn’t believe how well things were going. Will was still her friend, and she was willing to accept Spike, or at least talk about it.

“Of course we can talk about it. I’m so glad you understand Will, I was afraid we weren’t gonna work this out.”

The two friends hugged and grinned at each other, both relieved that they had at least started to work things out.

“Buffy? Didn’t you say you had something to ask us?”

Buffy glanced at Tara confused before she remembered the other reason she’d come to talk to them.

“Oh right. Yeah, see after the major drama last night Travers has concluded that I am unfit to receive their info and wants to have Giles deported. They’re arranging a meeting for tonight, stating their terms and letting us say goodbye. The Scoobies are all invited.”

“Oh no Buffy!”

“Relax Will. I am not letting them do that. I haven’t been thinking straight lately but Spike’s been big with the making sense. Of course the way things were going I ended up taking it personal and not listening so we got in a big fight and it took Mom’s reasoning to get me to reconsider and realise that he was, in fact, accurate. I’m supposed to be the big Chosen One but I’ve been running around trying to impress some stuffy bookworms who literally couldn’t fight to save their lives without an arsenal and an enemy who played by their rules. Tonight I’m putting a stop to that. I’m the Slayer, they need me. It’s about time I made that perfectly clear. So are you guys gonna be there?”

“Of course we will,” both wiccans nodded enthusiastically, “we’ll be there Buffy, and we’ll back you up too.”

“Thanks guys. Okay, next up Xander. Boy how I am not looking forward to that.”

“Well if it helps I can talk to him later too and make sure he comes tonight and Anya can try as well. It definitely won’t be easy though. Xander and vampires? So not mixy and this is Spike. I don’t think there’s a vamp he dislikes more, well maybe Angel, but that was before you and Spike started dating so…you know what, I’m shutting up now.”

“Believe me I know. Ugh I better get going, the sooner I do it the better and if I keep putting it off I’ll lose my nerve. Wish me luck.”

“Good luck,” Willow and Tara both said as Buffy turned to leave. Outside the door she let out a relieved sigh. That had gone much better than expected. Now for the really hard part.

***

She knocked on Xander’s door and waited. And waited. And waited. She knocked again. Inside she heard someone moving around. She knew he hadn’t gone to the construction site that morning, calling in sick, which meant he was really, really mad. Perfect. She banged on the door more forcefully but her only response was a few more muffled noises and grumbling. Losing her patience she banged her fist on the door so hard it shook. She was sorely tempted to just break it down but figured that wouldn’t be a good start. She persisted in her abuse on the door until she heard footsteps approaching and stepped back before it was flung open, revealing a very dishevelled and irritated Xander.

“Should have known it was you.”

“Yeah the door rattling on its hinges was your first major clue.”

He scowled at her and she kicked herself inwardly. Sass would not help, she had to keep her temper in check.

“Can I come in?”

“Dunno. If you’re a vampire in need of an invite then no.”

Count to ten Buffy, don’t lose your cool. You expected this.

“We need to talk Xander. Please let me in? I really don’t fancy having this out in the hallway.”

“Really? I don’t feel like having this out at all. Goodbye.”

He tried to shut the door but she slammed a hand against it and pushed back, forcing her way past him and into the room.

“Okay, I really just asked to be polite. We need to talk and whether you want to or not that’s what we’re gonna do.”

He slammed the door closed behind her and made his way over to the couch which he flopped down on and avoided her gaze.

“By which you mean you talk and I listen right?”

“Judging by the conversation so far? Yeah, looks like.”

“Fine, so talk. Can’t guarantee a rapt audience.”

Okay so a nice explanation like the one with Willow earlier was out. He was in no mood to discuss this. She’d just have to get the facts out and try to convince him to turn up at the Magic Box for the meeting later. Any understanding about Spike would have to wait.

“I don’t want to fight and you clearly don’t want to hear what I have to say so I’m just gonna fill you in on what’s happening outside this room. First off, I’m with Spike now,” she ignored the sneer he shot her, “I never said anything because of the Council and how you guys would take it.”

He scoffed and she ignored that too, continuing her speech before he said anything she’d have to force him to regret.

“I was going to tell you once they left and I know it’s gonna take time to adjust to, and yes, if you’re still my friend you will have to adjust. I am not breaking up with Spike.”

She levelled him with a steely gaze which he returned for a few seconds before looking away. The disdain was evident on his face but he was keeping quiet, for now.

“I am also not going to sit back and let people control my life anymore. When you feel like talking about this I’ll be waiting but I will not listen to any nasty comments or accusations like those of last night. I have discussed things with Willow and Tara and they at least are willing to listen and consider things before passing judgement. Lastly, after the fiasco with Riley, Travers has ordered that Giles be deported and has decided not to help with Glory.”

Xander looked up sharply at the news of Giles’ deportation, furious and about to say something she knew would be unpleasant. She cut him off quickly.

“Before you say anything let me be very clear that that is not going to happen. I am no longer going to sit back and let the Council make all the rules. Giles isn’t going anywhere, however he may feel about that now. He’s not going to be forced to leave anyway. They arranged a meeting for tonight and we are all invited, which yes, includes you. It’s a chance for everyone to say their goodbyes, which again, won’t be necessary because that won’t happen. Things need to be said and some ground rules need to be laid down. That’s happening tonight. I’d like you to be there. At least you’ll be in the loop. That’s all.”

She waited for a minute or two before it became clear he wasn’t going to say anything.

“Okay then. I’ll let myself out.”

She was at the door when he spoke.

“If I do go…”

She paused, waiting for him to finish without turning around.

“…it will be for Giles. If I go.”

She nodded and left. Not the best she could have hoped for, but definitely not the worst either. There was a chance he’d be there. That was important. She just hoped they would be able to talk about Spike, or at least break this huge wall of ice between them sometime soon. She wasn’t counting on it.

***

While Buffy was gathering the broken troops and attempting to put a plan of action together for her next face off with Travers, Spike was in the bad part of town getting nicely drunk. Halfway home after the fight with Buffy his feet decided to change direction and head toward Willy’s. One good thing about the demon bar was that it was always open. He had finally achieved that pleasant numbness that comes from downing several bottles of Jack, enough to overcome that vampire constitution of his. He was struggling to stay seated on the bar stool while Willy said something that he supposed would make sense if he were actually listening.

“Whassat?”

Willy rolled his eyes and leaned forward, speaking slowly.

“I said, do you think it’s a good idea for you to be here? Your last visit ended with a pretty bad beating if memory serves.”

“I told you the last bloody hundred times I don’ give a shit. ‘Sides, lasted this long haven’ I? No one’s tried to…to…to rip my head off yet have they?”

He swayed more precariously on his barstool and managed to knock a couple of his empty shot glasses off the bar and onto the floor where they made a loud smashing sound. Willy cursed under his breath.

“Wouldn’t be that difficult right now. I reckon the only reason you didn’t get trouble when you came in was because you looked about ready to kill someone, and now they just don’t think you’re worth it. Where’s the fun in beating up a tanked vamp? Look, Spike, man, I think you should head home okay? You’re breaking too many glasses even without a fight and you’re gonna polish off my whiskey the way you’re going. Why don’t you just head home and sleep it off. I don’t know what happened to set this drinking binge off and frankly, I don’t wanna know, but it can’t be that bad. Just go sleep it off and see how you feel after the massive hangover you’re in for okay?”

Spike growled and swiped at Willy, attempting to grab him by the collar. He missed without the other man even having to move and his momentum knocked him off balance sending him crashing to the floor. He lay there a bit stunned before he regained focus on the ceiling and groaned. Willy’s head popped over the bar and he shook his head at the blonde vamp struggling to sit up.

“What’d I tell ya? C’mon Spike, up you get, time to head home.”

Managing to haul himself shakily to his feet, Spike stumbled a bit then sniffed and ran a hand through his bleached hair, which upset his balance and made him stumble some more. He swung an arm out and clutched at the bar to steady himself.

“’S daylight out you git. You want me to burn to a bloody crisp?”

“Like sunlight ever stopped you before? Sewer’s that way pal,” he said, jerking a thumb towards the storeroom in the back.

“Bloody pillock. Don’ know why I bother comin’ here.”

“Neither do I man, neither do I,” Willy answered as he watched Spike stagger over to the back door.

He let out a sigh, relieved that the vamp was leaving. He was more trouble than he was worth, and dangerous when he was mad, but so long as he kept showing up in a foul mood, Willy would keep supplying the liquor. A drunk Spike was much easier to manage than an angry one. He just hoped that wouldn’t happen too often.

Chapter 19

“Okay, let’s see, Willow and Tara are definitely coming and so is Anya, Giles has to be there so that just leaves Xander.”

“I can’t believe he said those things to you.”

Buffy looked at her little sister Dawn again while she finished getting changed. She’d swung by the Magic shop after her talk with Xander to do some training while Giles was, predictably, out. Dinner was over and she was preparing for the big showdown at the meeting tonight. Dawn had come up and joined her after a while. Buffy was glad her sister was on her side in all this but she was confused as to why Dawn would be so happy that Spike and Buffy had gotten together.

“Yeah well, Dawnie, Xander isn’t exactly big on the vamp love, not that I blame him, and Spike was never one of his favourites, heck he wasn’t exactly on my list of favourites either.”

“No I guess Angel topped that, and, wait, who was second? Oh right you didn’t have one…unless of course Spike…”

Buffy shot her sister a look and Dawn grinned. Teasing Buffy was fun and Dawn was going to make the most of it while she could.

“Hey I’m just saying, besides, I get what you mean about Xander but I still can’t believe he could be such a jerk.”

Buffy smirked and decided to do some teasing of her own.

“So the crush is off then?”

Dawn’s eyes widened comically and she straightened from where she’d been leaning against the wall.

“I so was not crushing on him, and even if I was, I like Spike better anyway.”

It was Buffy’s turn to look surprised.

Wait, what now? Since when has Dawn ever liked Spike?

“Since when?”

Dawn rolled her eyes.

“Please. I may not spend that much time with the once evil bloodsucking fiend but a girl would have to be crazy not to notice, Spike is totally hot. I mean that whole bad boy thing, bleached hair, the leather, the smoking, all that sexy smirking cos he knows exactly how hot he is, not to mention the accent. If I didn’t think you’d murder me for it I would have been spending most of my free time at his crypt.”

“Excuse me?”

“Not doing anything, relax, sheesh, teenager here, just talking, hanging out. But alas, my chance is gone, he’s all about the Buffster now. Not that he’d have ever noticed me to begin with.”

“Hanging out with Spike? Oh yeah, you would have been in so much trouble for that missy. You’d seriously want to spend time at his crypt? What about all the times he tried to kill us?”

“Correction, tried to kill you. He was never anything but nice to me and Mom, and you are the Slayer after all, but, hey, I guess he didn’t really wanna kill you after all, he’s completely in love with you.”

Buffy tried to take all this in, still reeling from the fact that Dawn liked Spike. Correction, had a crush on him. She internally rolled her eyes.

Yet another member of the Spike fan club, it just keeps growing. How the hell does a so-called evil vampire get so many people to like him?

When she thought about it Dawn was right. A girl would have to be crazy not to notice the hot British bad boy with that alluring sense of danger. She’d felt it herself at the beginning but ruled it out because they were enemies and you did not have lusty thoughts about your enemies, especially not when you had a boyfriend…at least you weren’t supposed to.

“Let’s hope he’s still in love with me when I find him.”

“Well it’s only been a day and he can’t move around that easy with the big ball of fire in the sky. He’ll probably show up tonight.”

“I don’t know if that would be a good idea considering what happened but I’d definitely like to feel him around just so I know he’s okay. Stupid vamp making me worry.”

Dawn smirked which, Buffy noticed for the first time, was very reminiscent of the blonde Brit and stepped closer, placing a hand on Buffy’s shoulder and looked at her seriously.

“You, dear sister, have got it bad. Worrying about him when it’s not even been twenty-four hours? Talking about him to Mom and finally making a stand against the Tweed Patrol? He’s good for you. I bet he wouldn’t disappear off nearly so much if you told him how you really felt.”

“What? What do you mean, he knows I have feelings for him. Wait what are you implying?”

“Sure, feelings. Feelings with no further description. Like I said Buffy, you’ve got it bad. Think about it.”

Dawn moved back out of the room leaving Buffy’s mind whirling. She paused before fully leaving the doorway.

“Don’t forget, the meeting’s starting soon, wouldn’t want you to be late.”

With that said she skipped off down the hall smiling to herself.

What? But…I…huh?

Buffy considered the meaning behind Dawn’s words. Apparently her sister didn’t think she was being completely honest with her boyfriend about how she felt, but that couldn’t be true. Obviously she cared about him. He loved her, he would do anything for her and he was always trying his best to make her see the woman he saw, who she could be if she stopped hiding and trying to fit in with her idea of normal.

Wait a minute.

She backtracked. He was very clear about his feelings for her, he loved her, but Buffy had never defined what she felt about him. But that was because she wasn’t sure how she felt, wasn’t it? She had agreed to give him a chance and so far he’d proven that it was the right decision but she’d never really explored it further. It was too soon to think about, it had to be. She thought about all those times they’d been together and how she’d felt when she’d looked into those bluer than blue eyes and saw his heart right there in front of her and how it had been so calming and exciting at the same time, when she’d felt loved and protected and cherished, when she’d been falling…

Falling…

Dawn’s words echoed in her ears, “you’ve got it bad.” She plopped down on the bed and whimpered. The last thing she needed right now was another great big epiphany.

***

Travers was pacing back and forth in the magic shop, outwardly composed but with a slight spring in his step. The members of his team were gathered around, all clutching their clipboards and watching him. They could sense his satisfaction. Ever since she’d turned her back on the Council after surviving her Cruciamentum, Travers had been longing for a way to get back at the brazen little cheerleader and he finally had his moment, thanks to her inexplicable attraction to vampires. Lydia thought to herself that at least where William the Bloody was concerned, the attraction was understandable, but she would never admit that to her superior, not if she wanted to keep her job.

Giles leaned against one of the bookshelves, staring at the floor stoney-faced. He was keeping disturbingly quiet, not even saying a hello to the others when they arrived. The rest of the Scoobies were sitting upstairs, behind the railings, feet dangling over the edge, all casting looks at the older man. Anya had been working in the shop all day and so was the first one waiting for the meeting to start. Giles and the Watchers were next, early as usual, not wanting to miss the chance to position themselves imposingly around the shop. They needn’t have worried. They had plenty of time. Willow and Tara were next to arrive and together, they and Anya made their way upstairs to avoid the uncomfortable tension created by the Watchers. Travers wanted them in the background anyway. Xander had shown up, much to their relief but also making them anxious that he would say something stupid. He would have been late, which is probably what he’d intended if the one person who was expected to be there had turned up. Joining his friends without a word to the Watchers, barring a sidelong look at an oblivious Giles, he clearly was confused and irritated that Buffy wasn’t there yet.

“Where the heck is she?” he whispered to Willow.

The red-head shrugged nervously.

“I honestly don’t know. She’ll definitely be here, she probably just got delayed fighting some demons or something.”

Xander snorted.

“Well she better be here after invading my house telling me to show up. If she’s with that vamp…OW!”

The Watchers glanced up briefly, annoyed, and Xander rubbed his arm where Anya had rather painfully pinched him. He scowled at her and she glared back making him lean away scared. He tried to cover up his nervousness at his girlfriend’s displeasure by complaining.

“What was that for?”

“If I hear one more word about Buffy and Spike, Alexander Harris, I’ll rip that arm off and beat you with it,” she hissed menacingly.

Xander flinched and Willow and Tara turned wide eyes on the ex-vengeance demon. Xander opened his mouth to speak but a raised hand from Anya made him shut it quickly, afraid she’d hit him again. Instead she jabbed a finger into his chest, pushing him back as she punctuated every word she threatened in a voice barely above a whisper.

“No. No to whatever dumb comment, nasty insult or snide remark you want to make. No, no, no! Spike and Buffy are a couple, deal with it. She obviously likes him and he clearly gives her many pleasing orgasms and who she chooses as a partner has nothing to do with you, got it? She will be here. Now shut up and wait like the rest of us and get over this prejudice you have against demons before I reconsider why I’m dating you.”

With that said, Anya turned back to watch the front door, her face set in stern disapproval as Xander rubbed his sore chest. He had paled at the word orgasms and decided to keep his mouth shut as he shrank back from his fuming girlfriend and sulked, turning his attention to the door as well. Willow and Tara gaped, impressed. Anya always spoke her mind and sometimes, it seemed, it paid off, although the bit about pleasing orgasms was a bit much. Maybe her and Xander were right for each other if she could deal with him like that. Add to that her defence of Buffy, though the two never really seemed to get along, and their impression of the ex-demon changed. They had a whole new admiration for the feisty, straight-forward blonde.

***

Buffy had planned to be the last one to arrive. She knew Travers would jump down her throat for it but she wanted to make an entrance. Them waiting for her was an important statement if she was to prove they needed her and not the other way around, so she had waited outside, hidden, as she observed her friends entering. She had just about given up on Xander when he arrived, still with a sour expression on his face but his being here was a good sign that he was still willing to be a part of the group, even if it was just for Giles.

After a deep breath and taking a few minutes to steel herself for battle Buffy walked through the door, the bell announcing her arrival as something deceptively cheerful. Every eye in the place turned to face the Slayer and she fought an unexpected flutter of stage fright, continuing in to the room, appearing unconcerned as she took a place near the centre of the room. This was what she wanted. All eyes were on her ever since she was called, criticising and judging her. Now she would gain their attention because she commanded it, because her word was law and anything to do with her personal life was none of their business unless she said otherwise.

She stood as tall as she could and folded her arms, staring Travers straight in the eye, smiling expectantly. The Council head seemed slightly put off at her carefree behaviour, it was not what he expected from the girl whose life was about to change drastically under his orders. He brushed it off as false confidence, a facade to attempt to hide the distress she must truly be feeling. He raised his head so he could look down at her and clasped his hands behind his back.

“Miss Summers. You’re rather late aren’t you? I understand this must be a distressing time for you, bidding farewell to the man who has mentored you for so long but I thought you would have had more respect for the man to at least show up on time, not to mention the discourtesy you’ve shown your superiors.”

Buffy didn’t miss Xander’s slight nod as Travers berated her for being late, nor did she miss the less than subtle glare Anya shot in his direction that had him shift his gaze to the floor uncomfortably. She had plenty to say to Travers but wanted to wait and let him believe he had the upper hand here. After all, there was nothing like luring your enemy into a false sense of security, was there?

“Well I’m here now.”

Giles glanced up, surprise flashing across his eyes before he remembered he was being Mr. distant and moody and turned his attention back to the floor. It was the biggest reaction he’d had since the big reveal. He wasn’t the only one who was surprised. If she didn’t have everyone’s attention before now, that had soon changed at her short reply. It wasn’t at all what they had been expecting. An apology or annoyed remark, yes, a simple acknowledgement and expression suggesting he get on with it, no. Travers raised an eyebrow before deciding to just carry on. The girl was tough and putting on quite a show of bravado but it wouldn’t last, not with what he was about to say.

“Yes, well, Miss Summers, as you know Mr. Giles shall be returning to London with us. We’ve made reservations at the hotel for him to stay there until our flight and feel it’s best he have no further contact with you or your…team. Furthermore I think it has been well established that you continue to place civilian lives in danger because of your selfish desire to surround yourself with friends and family despite your calling. Because of this, we feel you should also travel to England where you will be retrained as you should have been from the start. In the meantime we can send a defence unit to the Hellmouth to maintain control. Understand that this is a second chance for you to prove yourself as a Slayer.”

Buffy raised an eyebrow at that but maintained her unconcerned demeanor. He wanted to take her to England huh? She hadn’t seen that coming, not that it mattered.

“After reconsideration I decided that although I was initially prepared to cut off connection with you, the fact remains that you are a champion for the powers and an asset if given the proper guidance. You understand this means doing as instructed and not consorting with the enemy any longer. Also, while you may be in the same country, this does not mean you will have any communication with Mr. Giles. Is this clear Miss Summers?”

“Crystal.”

Several voices upstairs gasped and shocked faces looked down at her. Giles once again broke his piece of the furniture impression to gape at her. He might be mad at her but her apparent willingness to comply with the Council had him stumped and must have hurt too. She couldn’t help the thought, good, that her behaviour was upsetting him. She was mad at the way he’d treated her too. The Watchers seemed unprepared for this new side of the Slayer and fidgeted nervously. Lydia kept casting glances from Buffy to Travers wondering where this might be leading. Travers himself seemed a bit put off and flustered by her behaviour but cleared his throat and prepared to continue which is what Buffy was waiting for before making her move.

“Now that we’ve established that I’ve heard you out loud and clear, I expect the same from you. You see I have a few words of my own to share tonight and I expect you to listen.”

The female Scoobies relaxed, this was what they had expected. Travers looked indignant and opened his mouth but Buffy raised a hand to silence him.

“Please hold all questions until the end, thank you.”

She began to pace slowly back and forth, keeping her arms folded with a relaxed expression as though she were completely at ease with everyone focused on her.

“Now that I have such a rapt audience it’s time we set the record straight. I am the Slayer. The one and only. Yes, Faith is a Slayer, but seeing as she’s locked up right now with some major issues to deal with you’re stuck with me. As the Slayer it’s my job to battle whatever evil hell-spawn is trying to end the world and so far I think I’ve done a pretty good job, considering I died once and all.”

Travers was not pleased and made a move to interrupt but she carried on, ignoring him.

“Now, despite what’s happened the last few days the fact is you need me Travers. The Council needs me, and you know it. I’ve been too blind to realise that I’m the one who should be calling the shots here, not you, and that’s going to change. You see, Quentin, withholding information on the latest Big Bad makes you responsible for the next apocalypse, one that actually will be the end of the world if you decide not to cooperate and haul me off to England instead. Now I’ve had enough of this charade, pretending you have a right to control me. It ends now.”

She stopped pacing and faced him, staring him dead in the eye, her expression suddenly serious. Everyone knew she meant business and they waited for her to finish. Even Xander was looking on with interest and for the first time since last night, Giles was fully focused on her.

“Here’s what’s going to happen. You give me all the info you have on Glory and the Key she’s after and I don’t take it from you by force, which, I shouldn’t have to warn you would be a painful and unpleasant experience for you and your…” she flicked her eyes over the other Watchers briefly, “…team. Giles stays here. There will be no deportation and as a matter of fact I believe he should be reinstated as my Watcher since he’s done a damn good job of mentoring one of the longest living Slayers on record and I’ve made it perfectly clear he’s the only one I’ll work with. In fact, his success and hard work should result in a nice fat pay check, which, since he has been acting as my Watcher all these years, should be paid retroactively understood?”

Giles’ mouth dropped open. The Scoobies let out little cheers, except Xander who was reluctant to show too much enthusiasm but had a smile on his face as he observed Giles. No matter what his argument with Buffy was, doing that for the gang’s father figure deserved respect and showed that the older man was appreciated. He would be happy that Giles could stay at least. The Watchers were either, stunned, confused or outraged as they muttered amongst themselves and darted looks at Travers and Buffy.

The head of the Council was going different shades of red in outrage. How dare she speak to him like that? This was not acceptable. He had to restore order and regain control of the situation.

“Miss Summers I shouldn’t need to remind you that you are in no position to make demands. We are your superiors and I think…”

“I don’t give a damn what you think!” Buffy slammed her hands down on the table, cold eyes trained on the older man.

Silence struck the room as the Slayer and Head of the Council stared each other down. Travers was stunned as he looked into the eyes of a warrior, the Slayer. He felt a tremble run through him at the force in the girl’s eyes and couldn’t believe she was the same woman he’d been ordering around the past few days.

“It’s become painfully obvious that you need me, not the other way around. All this ‘reconsideration’ and ‘giving me a second chance’ is just a cover for the fact that you would be nothing without me. The Council exists because of the Slayer, not the other way around, and without me your jobs are meaningless. Glory is coming and we don’t have time for games. You either give me the information and remain, in some form, my allies, or I see you as a threat, take what I want, and put an end to your organisation once and for all, and yes,” she stood and held out a hand to stop him interrupting, knowing exactly what he was about to say, “I do have the power to do that.”

“Y..y..you can’t…we..you…this an outrage!”

She quirked an eyebrow at him and smirked.

“I don’t doubt that but it’s the truth. Now to address the issues you have with me personally. I do things by my rules, that’s how I stay alive. My family and friends understand the danger they are in and they accept it even when I would prefer they not take the risks they remain by my side because they are more useful than any of you. The witches are more powerful than you could hope to be and they pay for their mistakes and correct them. I’d like to see you take such responsibility. All your training doesn’t come close to the field-time they’ve clocked and when I ran away that one time, they kept Sunnydale safe, something you could never do.”

Giles was still shell-shocked from her statement about him being reinstated as a Watcher with retroactive pay but looked up as she defended her friends before turning his attention to the Scoobies who each seemed affected by her words. Anya and Tara were grinning wildly and Willow was tearing up, a smile on her face, her bottom lip wobbling emotionally. Xander was watching the girl he had admired for so long with a new appreciation. Before him was a strong, powerful woman who had hidden away behind a cheery, normal girl persona. He was beginning to see there was more to Buffy than he initially thought. She was a leader, their leader.

“The vampire…”

She glanced up to notice than Xander’s face clouded briefly before he looked at the ground. She waited until he looked up and met his eye. After a beat he nodded and gave her a small smile. Giles had also found the floor interesting all of a sudden but felt Buffy’s eyes turn to him and looked up, drawing in breath he too gave a small nod. She could accept that, for now. She looked back at Travers.

“Spike has been an invaluable ally for a while now. You know how dangerous he is and the chip in his head only prevents him from hurting a human directly, there’s no reason he couldn’t turn to demons and minions to help. He fights by my side because he wants to and yes, we have since become a couple, but he is not the enemy. As far as I’m concerned the enemy is you. Spike’s proven himself to me, soul, or no soul,” Xander and Willow’s mouths twitched, remembering the blonde vamp’s words, “now it’s your turn, somehow I doubt you’ll manage as well as he did. Now,” she tossed her hair back over her shoulder and raised her head, a triumphant grin on her face, “about that info…”

Travers glared at her before taking a deep breath and staring at the table, when he looked up again she saw the resignation in his face.

Finally.

“Very well. It seems we underestimated you Miss Summers. You want the information and we’ll give it to you. Glory isn’t a demon,” he paused and she waited expectantly, “she’s a God.”

You could hear a pin drop. Buffy’s brain seemed to slow down as she absorbed his words.

“What?”

***

Joyce was washing up in the kitchen when she heard the back door open and shut behind her. She frowned. Dawn was up in her room and she wasn’t expecting Buffy back yet. Surely the meeting couldn’t be over yet? It wasn’t a good sign if that was the case. She turned off the tap and turned around, whoever she had been expecting it certainly wasn’t the person now standing in front of her.

“Spike?”

“’Lo Joyce.”

The dishevelled vamp wobbled a bit on his feet before plopping down at the counter. He was definitely looking worse for wear, his clothes wrinkled and his hair sticking out in places from its typically slicked back style. His eyes seemed rather unfocused and seeing him sitting there at her counter looking like he did gave Joyce a sense of Déjà vu.

“Not that you’re not welcome but what are you doing here? If you’re looking for Buffy she’s out.”

“Know that. If Buffy was here I wouldn’ be. Fancied a chat was all. You were the ‘nly person I knew who knew, least I s’pose you know, bout what happened, with the…fight, an’ all.”

He ran a hand through his hair, messing it up even more and Joyce felt sorry for him. He looked like he was going through hell. Of course he also looked drunk which she wasn’t too happy about but it was Spike and he had certain ways of dealing with things. Ways she hoped would change for the better.

“I’m well aware, yes. You were rather harsh on her you know. I agree with what you were trying to do but it probably could have waited until she was ready to hear you out, or at least until you had your temper under control.”

She gave him a disapproving look and he lowered his gaze shamefully.

“I know. I jus’…I got mad an’…Buffy an’ I seem to handle fightin’ better than talkin’ sometimes. I didn’ mean to upset her more but I wanted her to see…an’ when she started sayin’ I only loved the Slayer an’ not her it pissed me off. I’m sorry.”

Joyce felt her annoyance melting away at the sad sight and his obviously sincere apology. She stepped forward and leaned on the counter facing him.

“I’m not the one you should be apologising to. She knows that’s not what you meant. As a matter of fact she’s taken your advice. If everything goes according to plan she should be taking charge of her life as we speak at that meeting tonight.”

“Yeah? What meetin’ s that then?”

“The Council arranged for her and the others to meet tonight and discuss their terms for Giles’ deportation and Buffy’s punishment. She’s going to surprise them and make a stand.”

Spike’s eyes lit up for a minute before a thought seemed to cross his mind and he frowned.

“Easier said than done though innit? Scoobies weren’ too thrilled at the news, she’s not gonna have too many friends there.”

“I wouldn’t worry about that. Buffy spent the day visiting them to talk things out. Willow and Tara are on her side and they accept that she knows what she’s doing. They’re not as against you as you might think and Anya actually seemed enthusiastic according to Buffy.”

“And the whelp? Don’ expect he listened to reason?”

Joyce smiled sympathetically.

“Not exactly but she made him listen. His presence is unpredictable but he didn’t seem completely against going. I know you have a lot of problems facing you but you and Buffy need to work this out. You’ll be stronger together and I know Buffy wants you around. She was really upset after you walked off.”

Spike winced and looked up at Joyce, hurt showing in his blue eyes.

“I never wanted to hurt her but she needs to sort this out and I’m afraid we’ll jus’ end up fightin’ again. I can’t stay away from her but I want to give her space as long as I can so she can figure this out. I want to prove to her I want her, not the Slayer. I don’ want her to think I’m pushing her into stickin’ up for herself.”

Joyce reached across the counter and patted his hand affectionately. If she ever doubted Buffy’s decision to be with Spike she knew now it was the right one. He really loved her.

“After tonight that shouldn’t be a problem any more. No matter what the others think you have the support of the Summers women, including Dawn. Now,” she stood up straight and grinned at him, “how about some nice hot chocolate, with little marshmallows?”

“You know me too well luv.”

Chapter 20

Dawn thought she heard voices downstairs and was a little surprised. At first she was worried it was Buffy and that things had gone horribly wrong somehow. She was making her way downstairs when she realised the voice talking to her mother was male. She frowned in confusion.

Who could that be?

She was halfway downstairs when she identified the voice as British, and not stuffy Giles British either. Her eyes widened and she paused. He’d know she was there, being a vampire, so eavesdropping wouldn’t do any good, but, should she walk in or just go back upstairs? Her curiosity got the better of her as always and after checking that she was presentable and running her hands through her hair she continued into the kitchen where she saw a shabby, yet still sexy looking, Spike, cradling a mug of hot chocolate and chatting away with Joyce who was sitting next to him.

“Well this is definitely a surprise. So Spike, drop by because you were craving cocoa or were you looking for someone in particular?”

Spike turned to face her looking kind of embarrassed.

“Not here to see Buffy Niblet, jus’ felt like company is all. Big surprise you Summers women are the ‘nly people I can stand.”

Dawn blushed and inside, her hormone driven, teenage girl giggled.

He gave me a nickname. Keep it together Dawn, be cool. He’s your sister’s boyfriend remember.

She sighed a little at the thought.

Some girls have all the luck.

“So you aren’t rushing to make up with your girlfriend then? Colour me surprised, isn’t that what you normally do?”

“An’ look how well that’s worked out in the past. Look Bit I jus’ think Buffy needed the space, much as I’m payin’ for it at the moment. You know I won’ last long but I’m doin’ my best here.”

Dawn took a seat across from them and looked at her mother who shrugged.

“Did you ever consider that maybe she doesn’t want space right now? She was all worried before going to the meeting tonight that you’d pull a disappearing act and she wouldn’t get to work things out. She was afraid you’d still be mad at her.”

“Bloody got past mad after the first few drinks at Willy’s straight after. Moved right on to depression and regret.”

“You should talk to Buffy. She really wants to see you, even just sense you to know you’re okay. She has a lot she wants to say to you.”

Dawn hoped that was enough of a hint that he should see Buffy. She was sure their talk earlier had enlightened the Slayer about her feelings and that maybe she could reassure Spike that she wasn’t going to quit on him anytime soon.

“Don’ think so Niblet. She’s got a lot on her plate right now.”

Joyce rolled her eyes. Clearly this wasn’t working. Time to try a different approach. The disapproving Mom approach.

“Oh for heaven’s sake, Spike, stop wallowing in self-pity and get it through that head of yours that Buffy…cares about you,” she’d almost said the ‘l’ word and that had to come from Buffy first, “The past few days I’ve never seen her happier, with the exception of that fight and I changed my mind about you because, even though I already liked you, you were a vampire, but the point is you’re good for her, what she wants. You make her happy and I can’t sit back and watch two people who are important to me make themselves miserable because they’re stubborn and think too much about things.”

Spike blinked a couple of times and smirked.

“Reckon that’s the first time I’ve been accused of thinkin’ too much into anythin’ before.”

Joyce scowled at him and he dropped the smirk, suddenly serious. He almost forgot how scary the bird could be and an image of her with an axe came to mind.

“You’re right I guess. I’m a bleedin’ hopeless idiot anyway. I’ll talk to her, I will, I promise but,” he looked down at himself and then back at the two women watching him with identical expressions of amusement and expectancy on their faces, arms folded, “maybe after I’ve cleaned up a bit an’ look less like I was hauled out of a bar on my drunken ass.”

“That I agree with,” Joyce replied.

Dawn grinned widely, pleased that Buffy and Spike were going to make up. She’d get to see a lot more of the hot Brit now their relationship was out in the open and that could only be a good thing.

“You should drop by tomorrow. I have a check-up at the hospital and then we’ll be home. Buffy should have the rest of the day free whenever you want to stop by.”

Spike frowned when he heard the mention of the hospital but Joyce patted him on the shoulder, touched he’d show concern for her.

“It’s just a routine check-up to see how things are, I’m fine.”

“Better be. Right then, guess I should go before Buffy gets back. Less awkwardness the better an’ she’ll probably need to relax after the big confrontation. Thanks Joyce, Niblet.”

They smiled at him and Joyce rolled her eyes as Dawn blushed again.

Still, I can certainly see why. If I were younger…

She shook her head at the thought. Spike was more than a hundred years older than her anyway. Buffy would hardly be pleased to know her little sister and her mother found her boyfriend attractive, though she could hardly blame them.

***

Riley was furious. After word had gotten back to headquarters about the disastrous mission to eliminate hostile 17 he’d been called into an urgent meeting with his superiors where he was severely reprimanded for his behaviour. They had threatened him with a leave of absence to seek psychiatric help.

It’s that bitch and the vampire’s fault. I had him. He was right there. If she hadn’t shown up he’d be dust blowing in the wind right now.

Despite his protests they were convinced he was a risk to their operation and told him if he didn’t seek help they would have no choice but to order dishonourable discharge and ensure he was cut off from any further contact with them. As far as they were concerned he had endangered the lives of his men for a personal vendetta and he had to suffer the consequences. He was lucky he wasn’t being court-martialled.

Seek help. I’ll seek help alright.

He made his way towards the abandoned looking building purposefully. He had managed to sneak away without being noticed. They were looking into him now. It wouldn’t be hard to find out his secret, to discover his addiction. What was the point in going back now? He entered and didn’t even glance at the so-called bouncer. He was a regular. Several vamps downstairs watched as he walked by. He was pale, still suffering blood loss, another ‘accident’ waiting to happen. They’d seen people suffer the addiction badly before but this guy was demanding. He didn’t beg like so many of the others, he ordered it, often threatening them with a stake. They knew who he was, part of that organisation that had captured demons and run experiments on them. He would be no loss.

Upstairs he entered his usual room. A female vamp was in there, feeding on some scrawny guy. Riley pulled her away from the man, hauling him up by the shirt and tossing him out. The guy was too dizzy to realise what was happening. Riley turned to the snarling female and removed his jacket, rolling up the sleeve of his shirt.

“Do it.”

The female’s face softened and she approached him, eyeing him carefully. He grimaced when her fangs sunk into his wrist and exhaled as the familiar pleasure of his life force flowing into her took over. The feeling of being needed. He sank against the wall and slid to the floor while she followed, keeping her fangs embedded in his flesh. Her yellow-gold eyes watching him carefully. This one wasn’t coming back from it this time.

***

Buffy watched as the last of the Watchers left the Magic Box. The door closed behind him and silence reigned over the little group once more. Buffy wasn’t done yet. She’d taken care of the Council and what she’d found out had been more worrying than helpful. Glory was a Hell-God, kicked out of her dimension by the other two Hell-Gods that shared that world. Now she was trying to find her way home through a portal that would open every dimension and bring about the end of the world. To do that she needed the Key, Dawn. She had a lot to think about, but she needed the gang together if they were gonna work this out.

“So. Hell-God huh? That’s new.”

The others came downstairs. Tara and Willow took a seat at the table, Anya went to count her money again, a sure sign she was worried and Xander sat on the steps. No one said anything. What did you say when you found out you were up against a God? Surprisingly the one who eventually answered was the last person they expected to hear from.

“It will most certainly make me work for my pay check that’s for sure.”

Buffy looked at Giles, not daring to hope he’d come round just yet. She kept her face impassive, testing the waters. He seemed…normal enough, but that shouldn’t be right. He wasn’t just going to act like nothing had happened was he?

“Buffy,” he began and paused, reconsidering, he removed his glasses for a good polish, placed them back on his nose and faced the Slayer, “ Buffy I…I never expected…Good Lord this is difficult.”

She waited, swallowing hard, ready to face what he had to say. She couldn’t help the spark of hope flaring up that maybe, somehow, he was trying to make this right. That her mentor and friend hadn’t completely abandoned her.

“I’m not pleased. Understatement of the year actually, about, well, you know…”

She waited, gave him a small nod, noticing everyone watching him. Xander was looking on with interest, seemingly contemplating something before glancing at Anya who was keeping one eye on Giles and the other on her money.

“That you would fight to keep me here and deal such a massive blow to Travers and his ego…well clearly something has changed for the better. You stood up for yourself, against people who had no right treating you like…Buffy, I’m sorry.”

She had to try really hard to hold her composure. He’d apologised, but that wasn’t enough.

“I was harsh and cruel with no right to be, and I did not deserve what you just did for me. You are truly one of a kind and I can only pray that you can forgive me. I let my emotions run away with me and let my hatred for Spike overwhelm my trust in your judgement. I don’t like Spike and I probably never will, but if it’s him that has made you stronger then, I…I shall have to learn to tolerate him.”

To say they were gob-smacked was an understatement. None of them had expected that from him, not when he’d acted so coldly. Buffy needed to make certain things clear still. Giles had made a step in the right direction but they had a long way to go.

“I’m up against a God, I need my Watcher. You did your duty better than they could so you deserve to be paid for it. I accept your apology, but I need for you to be clear on this. I want Spike by my side and I won’t pretend that we aren’t a couple around you guys because you don’t like it. He’s been there for me and we’ve all treated him like dirt in the past no matter how hard he tried. He deserves better and I refuse to act like he’s just someone you reluctantly have to be in a team with. He shouldn’t be an outsider but that’s what we made him. That has to change. You may not like it but you’re going to have to try, and I know that’s going to be a struggle for some of you,” she looked at Giles and Xander, “but that’s the way it’s got to be. I want my family with me in this and that includes Spike now.”

Giles took a breath, lowered his head briefly before looking back up, acceptance on his face.

“I understand. I shall do my best. I accepted Angel, the least I can do is offer Spike the same chance.”

“Spike isn’t Angel Giles.”

“I know. And that should make him more worthy of the opportunity to be part of the group.”

Buffy smiled and Giles returned it. Xander raised his hand and they turned their attention to him.

“Everyone here knows I hate the bleached menace…” the women scowled at him and he held up both hands in a defensive motion, “…BUT, I hated dead boy senior too. Vamps aren’t my thing alright? Never mind, look, what I’m trying to say is that I agree with G man, he deserves a shot, and I’ll…try, really, really hard to…accept…him, but I can’t guarantee it will be easy. My brain tends not to function too well with my mouth and sometimes the whole name-calling and mean spirited comments…okay what I’m saying is I’ll give him a shot and I’m perfectly willing to accept the glares and punishments thrown my way for any stupid remarks I make.”

He looked over at Anya who had stopped counting her money and was watching him carefully.

“Not every demon is bad, and I need to learn that.”

Two in one day? This new take charge Buffy was a definite improvement if these were the results. Maybe Anya had a little (or a lot) of something to do with Xander’s change of heart and Giles seemed to be almost proud of the way she was fighting for herself and her boyfriend, even against him. She had no doubt Willow and Tara would be the most accepting. Willow even more so once Buffy had a chance to have some girly talks with her about why she’d decided to be with their old enemy.

Speaking of which I could really use a friend to talk to right now about him.

Any discussion about Spike would have to wait for a while though, at least until they’d worked something out over this Glory thing. Giles knew about Dawn being the Key, yet another secret she was keeping from her friends but a necessary one. They were safer not knowing, especially if Glory was sending out spies and they had knights with swords breathing down their necks.

“Thanks, Xand, I know that wasn’t easy for you to say.”

Xander ducked his head and Anya walked over to sit next to him, smiling. Buffy turned back to Giles.

“So, what exactly are we going to do about Glory?”

“I hate to say it but I don’t think there’s a lot we can do. We know she needs the Key for a ritual and why, but we have no specific details. Knowing she’s a God means I know where to look when researching but I’m not sure we know much more than what the Council has already given us.”

“Okay so we still got nothing to go on other than she’s going to be a bitch to kill. Right, I say we call it a night. Everyone go get some rest and we hit the books tomorrow or at least try come up with a strategy.”

They all agreed and prepared to leave. Giles approached her at the door and said again how sorry he was, offering her a ride home. She accepted his apology but refused the ride, saying she’d much rather walk. She had a lot going through her head and wanted to mull it over in the fresh night air. Xander was still acting awkward, ashamed of his behaviour earlier but also struggling to seem okay with the situation. Things were going to take a lot longer to settle down between him and Spike, they both hated each other. Buffy hoped they could get past that for her sake.

“Buffy, that went well huh? Way better than I thought it would, not that I thought you couldn’t kick Travers’ butt or anything but Xander and Giles? I mean, wow.”

“Hey Will. Yeah, believe me I was pretty blown away too. It looks good, but, I know better than to expect them to be okay with this yet. They’re trying but, I know it’s gonna take time and effort…lots and lots of effort.”

“Well, you have my support and Tara’s. Spike’s not so bad…when he’s not waving broken bottles in my face demanding spells, I shouldn’t just judge him for that. He’s changed, I get it now, I mean, I saw how he took care of you and forgot all about fighting Xander when you got upset and he tried comforting you. Not the Spike I knew.”

“He really has become a better person, and I was so blind to it for so long. I need to find him and fix things.”

Willow’s brow furrowed in confusion and Tara looked equally perplexed.

“Fix things?”

Buffy remembered her friends knew nothing about the fight after they’d left. Well she had mentioned it to them but they probably didn’t realise it had been so serious or ended with Spike walking off.

“Remember I mentioned how we both get really stubborn and defensive and end up fighting, not listening to reason?”

“Not in so many words but, yeah, I can see that happening, why? Is this because you ended up fighting when Spike told you to stand up for yourself to the Council, and, I guess, us? Didn’t you make up?”

“Sadly no. We’re both so hot tempered and Spike realised he wasn’t gonna get through to me so he walked off and I was going to follow him but Travers called me in for the big ‘you fail Giles gets deported’ speech and I haven’t seen, heard or felt him around since.”

“Oh Buffy that’s…I don’t know what to say, I had no idea you’d had such a big fight, I mean, you fight all the time, I guess, I really never thought…”

“It’s okay Willow, really, Mom and Dawn have been convincing me he’ll turn up. It’s Spike, he never stays gone long…unless he’s really mad at me, I did say some stuff without thinking that he took the wrong way…I have to find him and apologise.”

“What sort of stuff?”

Buffy felt her cheeks flush with embarassment and shame. She’d been convincing them to give Spike a chance for acceptance and now had to explain that she’d hurt his feelings reminding him he was an outcast.

“Well I didn’t mean it the way he thought I did but I said that you guys wouldn’t accept him, or get over this, because he didn’t have a soul. I said it like it was fact without even thinking how it would hurt him. I don’t care he doesn’t have a soul but I knew you guys would and if I’m really honest I did too at first, until he showed me he doesn’t need one. He got all mad, pointing out that a soul didn’t stop lots of people doing bad stuff and he was trying and I just basically told him he was going to stay an outcast when I said it.”

“Wow Buffy, that’s…you need to talk to him.”

“I know, but I’m afraid he’s avoiding me. I made a little detour by his crypt on my way over but he wasn’t there. I haven’t sensed him at all. That’s only happened once before and it was before we got together and even then I was freaked over it, what with Riley’s death threats…Oh no! Riley, what if…”

Willow grabbed Buffy’s arm pulling her attention to the red-head.

“Breathe, I’m sure he’s fine. He hasn’t been gone long and Spike doesn’t spend all day in his crypt, we know he has a habit for wandering around the neighbourhood. As for Riley, I don’t think he was in any condition to go after Spike again and you were big with the scary so if he hasn’t already left town, he soon will.”

Tara nodded her head to reassure the Slayer but she was doubtful Riley would have listened to the warning. He wasn’t acting at all like a sane person so rational thought was probably out. Having said that, she did agree it was unlikely he’d go after Spike again so soon after the beating Buffy’d given him and his men. Still the sooner, she found Spike the better.

“Willow’s right Buffy, you just need to relax and go find him. I’m sure he’s okay, probably just a little upset but you can fix that, just like you’ve been handling everything else.”

Buffy calmed down. They were right, but she’d feel better once she knew he was alright. She should go look for him now.

“Well I don’t know about you guys but I’m beat. We’ve been talking for hours. Better get home and rest. Hey don’t you need to bring your Mom to the hospital tomorrow? Want me to drop by?”

Crap, I almost forgot about Mom’s check-up.

“Yeah, I do. That’s okay Will, feel free to visit if you want but it’s just a routine check-up so it shouldn’t take too long. I was gonna go looking for Spike but I guess I should go home tonight instead. I’ll have to find him tomorrow. Maybe I’ll have better luck when the sun’s up anyway. Only so many places he could be right?”

“Sounds like a plan. Call me tomorrow and let me know how things go, okay, with everything.”

“Count on it.”

***

Buffy said goodbye to her friends and began the long trek home. She was walking much slower than usual, replaying the day’s events and searching for any tell-tale signals that her vampire was around, but there weren’t any. She hugged herself tightly and smiled a little.

I keep thinking of him as my vampire now. Possessive much? But that’s how I feel, I want him to be mine, and he told me he is. Now I just need to convince him that I’m his, I want to be his.

She really did. Buffy wanted to belong to someone, someone who could love her unconditionally, something she’d been afraid of for so long. Spike could give her that. She just had to learn to let go, to break down all those walls she’d built up after her disastrous relationship with Angel, walls he was already starting to crumble. Riley and her had a lot of problems, but she also knew she’d never given herself to him completely, never truly let him in, she couldn’t. She needed to let Spike in. For some reason he was always able to see through her, to understand her. That was why she’d accepted the comfort he’d offered her that night in the kitchen. She hadn’t wanted to admit it but Spike was always the one she could be open with, who she didn’t try to hide from because it wouldn’t work. She once told Willow she didn’t think you could have a relationship without passion and fire and pain. She certainly had that with Spike.

These thoughts continued to run through her mind well after she got home and prepared for bed. She lay there, wide awake wondering where he was and if he was okay. Then she felt it. That familiar tingle.

She shot out of bed and over to her window, leaning out in search of a white-blonde head in the moonlight. She looked up and down the street but couldn’t see him anywhere.

I’m not imagining it. I know I can feel him.

It was distant, he was farther away than usual but he was there. Clearly wherever he was hiding he didn’t want to talk. But he was letting her know he was okay. She breathed a sigh of relief and while she was anxious that he still didn’t appear ready to talk to her, had hope that it was a sign he would be soon and maybe tomorrow she could see him, maybe he wouldn’t hide anymore. She stood at her window a little while longer before going back to bed, letting his signature vamp tingles wash over her. She drifted off to sleep with his presence surrounding her senses.

***

Spike stayed there most of the night, tucked away in the shadows, further away than he’d like. He knew if he’d been any closer she would have rushed out to see him and he didn’t want to have a big long talk when she had to bring her mum to hospital in the morning. Plus he was still anxious about whether or not they could keep their cool and not fight again, even though part of him was sure that wouldn’t happen now, not if she’d overcome her problems with the Council and the Scoobies. He knew he had to see her tomorrow and apologise, try to make up. He was living in hell right now being apart from her, and the doses of alcohol to numb his emotions lately weren’t doing him much good. He also felt that if he didn’t do something soon, Joyce and the little Bit would be teaming up to give him a serious talking to.

When he felt the approaching sun he left. He was heading to his crypt to get some sleep but would make sure to drop by once he knew they were back from the hospital. He had to sober up and at least try to look decent for her no matter how terrible he felt.

Don’ give a bloody damn what her mates think, there’s no way in hell I can stay away from her. If they’re comin’ round, great, if not, sod it, I can’ keep this up anymore. God what has she done to me? I know I’m love’s bitch but I really feel like I’d die without her. My perfect woman, perfect Slayer, Buffy. Swore to myself if I had her I’d never let her go like all those other gits and it’s time I made good on that promise.

He was determined that nothing would pull him from her side again. She was going to have to dust him first. Once the whiskey had started to wear off he realised Dawn was right and Buffy didn’t need space right now, she needed him, or to talk to him at least. She’d been alone when her friends turned their backs on her and then he’d stormed off too. He could kick himself, and mentally did, for getting so defensive, taking things too personally and not considering that she was hurt and probably never meant to hurt him with what she’d said. He wouldn’t make that mistake again. He’d be there for her from now on, no matter what.

Chapter 21

What a day. Whew, that trip to the hospital took longer than I thought, but at least everything’s okay. I need to go find Spike now.

Buffy and the rest of the Summers clan had barely gotten home when she was pulling on her coat, preparing to go look for Spike. Joyce spotted her and tried to come up with some excuse to make her stay home a bit longer. She had told Spike to drop by and had no doubt Buffy was on her way to find him. She didn’t want them missing each other, which would very likely happen since Spike couldn’t take his usual route when it was still daylight. If that happened, Buffy would get more worried when he wasn’t at home and keeping him here to wait for her to return would be just as difficult as convincing Buffy to stay.

“Buffy honey, you’re going out?”

“Yeah Mom, I need to find Spike so we can talk things out.”

“Oh, well, I was hoping you could, umm, stay and keep me company for a while.”

“Oh well, I would but I really need to find Spike and, Dawn’s here.”

“Oh, yes but, em…”

“I have a project to do for school that I need to finish and I left it really late and I’ll fail if I don’t get it done on time,” Dawn intervened having heard her mother struggle for a reason to make Buffy stay.

Buffy looked at them both getting suspicious.

“Something’s going on here.”

“What, no, nothing.”

“Right, what would be going on Buffy, you’re crazy.”

“Uh huh, so you’re actually worried about getting your homework done and can’t possibly keep Mom company for a while?”

“Right,” they agreed, nervous smiles on their faces.

Buffy folded her arms and gave them both a stern look.

“What’s going on? Don’t even try to keep this up, you’re worse liars than I am and that’s saying something.”

They glanced at each other quickly before Joyce sighed, giving in.

“Okay, please don’t think we’re interfering but we told Spike he should stop by after we got home from my check-up and I’m afraid you’ll miss him if you leave.”

Okay that, Buffy was not expecting.

“And when exactly would you have told him this?”

Dawn looked at the floor and then back at Buffy.

“He might have stopped by when you were at the meeting yesterday.”

Buffy didn’t know what to say. So he’d avoided her but come round for a chat with her Mom and her sister.

“Honey, he was a bit of a mess and he didn’t want you to see him like that. He was also afraid you weren’t ready to talk yet and he didn’t want you to feel he was pushing you into anything. He was pretty depressed and wanted someone to talk to. Since I knew about you both…”

Joyce shrugged as she finished her explanation.

“No, I get it. He couldn’t talk to me so he went to you, it’s fine. And you told him to drop by, so he was planning on keeping his distance for a while huh?”

“Oh that’s not…sweetie, he wanted to talk to you I just told him we’d be out this morning but you’d be free to talk once we got back, that’s all.”

Buffy thought about it before relaxing and giving her Mom a smile.

“Okay, sorry, I’m just freaked and felt a bit hurt he didn’t want to see me but, the important thing is he’s coming over soon right?”

“Exactly. Why don’t we sit down, have something to eat and see what fantastic shows are on daytime T.V. today while you wait?”

“Okay, guess I don’t have much choice.”

***

Dawn rolled her eyes as she caught her sister glance over in the direction of the back door again. They’d been sitting in front of the T.V. for about an hour and Buffy was doing her best to resist the impulse to rush out the door and go looking for Spike. She wasn’t used to waiting, especially for Spike and her patience was being tested. Joyce kept her attention on the television, occasionally putting out a hand to stop Buffy tapping her foot.

“You know staring at it won’t make it open.”

Buffy opened her mouth to retort, probably denying her blatant anxiety when the sound of the door opening reached her ears and the three Summers women whipped their heads up to look in that direction. They heard a muffled curse as the door was slammed shut, some shuffling around and then footsteps toward the living room. Buffy shot to her feet and then froze, unsure of what to do. Spike entered the room and stopped, looking suddenly uncomfortable as three pairs of eyes stared at him. He raised a hand and rubbed the back of his neck nervously.

“Um, hey Joyce, Bit,” he looked up at Buffy, “Buffy.”

“Hi.”

Eloquent Buffy, really.

Joyce glanced back and forth between them, rubbed her knees and then stood up.

“Hello Spike, I’m glad you made it.”

“Yeah, how was the…”

“Fine. I’m doing great actually, thanks for asking.”

“Good.”

Silence descended on the little group once more, Buffy fidgeted awkwardly and Spike seemed unsure where to look. Joyce broke the silence again.

“Well, I had a long day. I think a nap’s in order. Dawn didn’t you say you had homework?”

Dawn stared at her mother who was clearly signalling her with her eyes and realised what she wanted. She rose from her spot in the chair.

“Right yeah, my, uh, project. Yeah I should really, get started on that. See you later Spike.”

“Oh uh yeah, Bye Niblet, Joyce.”

Joyce and Dawn made their way upstairs, leaving Buffy and Spike alone to talk. Eventually Buffy gestured at the couch and Spike walked over and sat down, she sat at the opposite end and turned to face him.

“So…”

“So.”

They avoided each others gaze and Buffy wondered why it seemed so much more difficult talking to him than her friends or Travers. She’d been about to rush out the door a second ago to find him. Now he was here and she didn’t know how to begin. They both ended up speaking at the same time.

“Spike I…”

“Buffy I…”

They stopped and grinned shyly at each other.

“Why is this so awkward all of a sudden?”

“Don’ know pet. Maybe cos we’re both on unknown ground here. Our fights don’ usually have much of an impact…emotionally speaking o’ course…physically they’re usually much more brutal.”

“Makes sense. I never wanted to hurt you, you know? I didn’t mean what I said, you know I don’t care about you not having a soul don’t you? Because I don’t, you proved to me you don’t need one, you’re actually better than a lot of people that do.”

“Buffy, luv, I know, really, I do. Fact is I knew how upset you were an’ I had no right to go off on you like that. My temper…I’m workin’ on it, but I acted like a right tosser an’ I’m sorry. I never wanted to hurt you either.”

“I know that, but, I wish you wouldn’t have avoided me.”

“I wasn’ avoidin’ you.”

She stared at him.

“I wasn’, not really. Look, I don’ deal with things like that well an’ I tend to rely on the bottle to get me through it. Last thing either of us needed was to get into it while I was pissed an’ I was a right mess. Didn’ want you to see me like that.”

“I think I’ve seen you look a lot worse Spike.”

He nodded and smiled.

“Prob’ly. But this was different, yeah?”

She felt the intenseness of his gaze again and swallowed. She’d missed him so much and she knew what he meant.

“Yeah, this is different.”

He reached out and took her hand, entwining their fingers and she shifted closer to him, enjoying the contact.

“This is us.”

She moved even closer to him and they lost themselves for a moment, looking into each others eyes, their hands joined.

“You deserve better than me Buffy.”

That simple sentence was all it took to shake Buffy out of her haze and remember what it was she wanted to say to him. She realised then how much they’d taken him for granted, so much, even he didn’t believe he was good enough. It made her angry, but not at him, at herself. She’d led him to think that.

That has to change.

“Don’t you dare.”

Spike was thrown by the stern look she was giving him and pulled back a bit, stopped by her hand squeezing his and he looked back at her face. She was completely serious and held his gaze with every word she spoke.

“Don’t you dare talk like that. If anything I don’t deserve you. You’ve had to put up with so much hate and abuse from us for so long. You were doing the best you could, better than so many others and we ignored it, I ignored it.”

“Buffy…” he was stunned.

She felt tears pricking her eyes but held them back. They were tears of regret and she wasn’t going to spill them now, not when she had to explain to him how lucky she felt to have him love her. How much he’d helped her.

“Yet you still tried. You kept trying, even though you got nothing in return, and you kept loving me. No matter what I said or did to you, you continued to love me.”

“Kinda hard not to.”

“But it is! It’s really hard. Just look at my track record Spike. Out of anyone that’s ever tried, you got the worst and you never stopped. Who needs a soul when you have a heart like yours Spike? You love unconditionally and you don’t just stop. I can never explain how thankful I am to have realised that, to have you love me. I don’t ever want to hear you put yourself down like that again understand? I won’t let anyone else do it unless they want a serious ass-kicking and that includes you.”

He lifted his other hand to brush her hair away from her face and cupped her cheek, swiping the droplets of tears away from the corner of her eye with his thumb.

“Well then I promise not to do it anymore. Wouldn’ want the Slayer after me for bad-mouthing her boyfriend. But you’re wrong you know.”

She frowned, opening her mouth to argue but he cut her off.

“About lovin’ you. It’s really, really easy. I do it all the time.”

Now she was tearing up for a completely different reason. It was probably really corny to anyone else but she didn’t care. It had the desired effect. She never wanted them to argue again, unless it was the good-natured banter they enjoyed so much. She wasn’t entirely sure she wanted to give that up.

I seem to be doing a lot of crying lately. At least it’s for the right reasons this time.

She threw herself at him for a hug and he pulled her close, wrapping his arms around her and burying his face in her hair. She nuzzled his neck and breathed him in. Leather, cigarettes and Spike. She let out a happy, contented sigh. This felt right.

“God I missed you pet. So bloody much.”

She nodded in complete agreement.

“Missed you too. Missed you a bloody lot.”

He laughed at her impression of him and she shivered at the pleasant vibrations rumbling through his chest at the sound.

“I don’ sound like that.”

She leaned back to look at him but remained in his arms, wrapping her own around his waist.

“Yes you do. Do you make it through a single day without saying bloody this or bloody that or bloody hell?”

“Point. But that has to be the worst bloody English accent I’ve heard yet.”

She swatted his chest and he laughed again. She loved that sound.

“Bet I could find a better use for that mouth than cursing.”

He cocked an eyebrow, smirk slipping into place and she felt butterflies in her stomach.

“That right. What use would that be then kitten?”

She leaned in, lowering her gaze to his lips and then back up to his eyes.

“This.”

She pressed her lips to his and felt a jolt of electricity run through her. Spike responded eagerly, tilting his head to deepen the kiss and she moaned as the familiar sensations began coursing through her body.

She slid her tongue along the seam of his mouth and he opened up to her, greeting it with his own. They reacquainted themselves with each others mouths while Buffy ran her hands up and down his leather clad back, Spike tangling his fingers in her hair. It was turning into a pretty heavy make-out session when breathing became an issue for Buffy and she was forced to pull back.

“God I missed you Spike.”

He began kissing her neck and she closed her eyes, giving in to the feeling.

“Buffy. Love you. Never stayin’ away from you again.”

She opened her eyes at his declaration. Yet again he was open about his feelings, telling her he loved her. Now was the time. Finally she could face up to her own feelings.

“Spike, I…”

“Buffy?”

She blinked and Spike drew back at the sound of her Mom’s voice coming from upstairs.

Jeez Mom, great timing.

“What? What is it?” she called back, confused.

“Honey, I’m sorry to interrupt but Giles is on the phone. I would have told him to call back but he said it was about Glory?”

Buffy groaned. Sadly this was a call she probably would have to take. She looked at Spike apologetically.

“Sorry, could be important.”

He sighed but released her and patted her knee.

“S’okay luv, take the call. Don’ want the world to end.”

Maybe I don’t care, she thought selfishly as she got up to answer the phone but knew it wasn’t true.

“Hello Giles? Hey, hang on a sec,” she shouted up to her mother, “okay Mom, I’ve got it. So what’s up Giles?”

Spike sat and watched Buffy as she paced back and forth, occasionally murmuring a response. Mostly she was listening so Rupes must have had some news. He waited until she hung up the phone and turned to him.

“They’ve been researching all morning and so far found zilch other than what we know.”

Spike raised a questioning eyebrow.

“And that was worth the interruption because…?”

“Well he said that as good as what he’s got in stock is, there are texts more difficult to come by, books that would be circulating in the demon community say, but none of us really have a contact other than Willy and well, doubt he knows much.”

“Right. So lemme guess, I’m the new demon contact?”

“Well, he just suggested I ask if you knew anyone who might have access to something more useful. I mean, you do have a knack for finding lost translations and artefacts. The whole blood of the sire ritual, the gem of amarra…”

“Yeah, all when I was still respected by the demon community, before I started killin’ ‘em all.”

“So that’s a no then?”

He released a breath and looked up at the ceiling for a minute thinking, then he stood and walked over to her.

“I might know a guy. Well not really a guy…but he’s into a lot o’ that ritual stuff an’ he has at least as many books as Giles from what I heard tell, might be able to help.”

“So you haven’t actually met him then?”

“No but his name’s come up a few times an’ I’ve heard stories. The ‘nly bloke I can think of local that might have somethin’.”

“Well then it’s worth a shot. I assume this guy only does business at night?”

“Mostly. Safer anyway, if it’s at night I can go with you.”

“Agreed. Don’t really want to run the risk of him using any tricks since he’s so into ritual. You want to swing by tonight? The sooner the better, we need everything we can get.”

“Count me in. So Council gave up the goods huh?”

Buffy decided to fill Spike in on the events since their fight and all the information they’d found out about Glory. His eyes widened when she revealed Glory was a Hell-God that apparently could not be killed.

“A Hell-God? Wow Summers you’re really movin’ up the ranks. Gonna have to up your game for this one. I can see why you need that info.”

“Yeah, but there’s more you should know…”

She made up her mind. She had to tell him about Dawn. She needed all the help she could get, now that the Knights of Byzantium were after the Key as well. She trusted him. She knew she had to tell her friends soon too, but she didn’t want to put them in danger or have them act differently around her sister. It had been weird enough around here when Buffy and her Mom had found out. Spike could hold his own against Glory’s minions, although the knights were a different matter thanks to the chip and she felt she could rely on him not to treat her sister differently.

“…about the Key…”

“Thing Glory’s after?”

“Right, well…”

“Sorry to interrupt again you two but I really need to get a start on dinner. Speaking of which, Spike are you staying?” Joyce asked as she ventured downstairs.

Buffy sighed. This really wasn’t the place to talk. They needed to find some privacy later. She realised it had gotten pretty late while they were talking.

“Don’ exactly need to eat Joyce.”

Buffy turned to him. He was unsure about staying. Dinner with her family was a situation he never thought he’d find himself in, not thinking her mother would have approved of him at all, never mind like him, but it was something a boyfriend did and it was another way of showing him acceptance.

“She knows that. You still eat though don’t you, c’mon stay, it’ll be nice, and I’m not sure I wanna say goodbye to you yet. Actually scratch that I am sure I don‘t wanna say goodbye yet.”

He looked from Buffy to Joyce who were both smiling encouragingly at him. He didn’t want to leave but this was uncharted territory for him. Deciding she hadn’t just asked to be polite from the sincerity in her voice he made his mind up.

“Uh yeah, okay then, dinner would be great. Thanks Joyce.”

“Don’t mention it.”

The sound of footsteps hopping down the stairs made them look up to see an eager Dawn grinning at them.

“Spike’s staying for dinner?”

Buffy rolled her eyes and Spike smirked. Seems like none of the Summers women could resist his charms. They were all eager to have him stay.

“Yes he is. Why don’t you go help Mom in the kitchen?”

Dawn pouted.

“But…”

Buffy gave her, her best stern older sister look.

“Ugh, fine, just cos you two want to make with the smoochies.”

Buffy let out a gasp of outrage while Dawn stalked off to the kitchen and Spike chuckled.

“She’s not wrong. Not in the mood for sharin’ pet?”

“We just made up. I’m supposed to have your undivided attention now. She can go all teenage girl with a crush later.”

Spike pulled her close for a hug.

“I can promise you, you have all my attention luv. Now I believe we were in the middle of making up before that interruption earlier.”

He was leaning in to kiss her and she tilted her head up when the phone rang again. Spike growled and Buffy giggled.

“I’d better get it.”

She answered the phone and Spike went to sit back down on the couch and sulk while he waited for her to finish talking. She eventually hung up and came over to sit beside him.

“So what was that ‘bout then?”

“Willow. She rang to see how things went with Mom and I told her we made up. She wants us to drop by the Bronze later, sort of a celebration of Mom’s health and us as a couple.”

“So now they want to celebrate us gettin’ together?”

“Spike. Willow’s okay with it, it was just…really unexpected, and I told you they’re willing to give this a try. I want you in the group and they’re learning to deal with it.”

“Jus’ think you really must have done a number on ‘em is all. You tell her we were workin’ tonight?”

“Yeah but I actually think we should go. We can drop by for a while and then head out to find this guy you were talking about. It will be a way to get us together as a group and a step to showing how things are gonna be from now on, and you and Xander get to show some restraint and prove you’re capable of putting your differences aside.”

“Think you’re hopin’ for a miracle there, but I’ll give it a go.”

“Great, we can head over after dinner. Now lets hope there’s no more phone calls interrupting us.”

“Actually that reminds me.”

Buffy watched, quizzically as he dug in his pockets and pulled out a piece of paper which he handed to her.

“What’s this?”

“My phone number.”

She looked up quickly and he was holding a cell phone in his hand.

“Remember you tellin’ me to get one so you could reach me. Thought it was a good idea.”

She grinned at him.

“Oh yeah. Definitely one of my genius ideas. Wow you have a phone, that’s going to make things much easier.”

Spike was about to answer when he glanced behind Buffy and grinned. Buffy turned around to see Dawn standing there.

“Spike has a phone?”

She rolled her eyes. Great, she’d probably never get through to him now anyway. Dawn was going to harass him. Maybe a phone wasn’t such a good idea.

Chapter 22

Buffy had that warm glowy feeling that had been so rare throughout her life. She had had an amazing evening that was only getting better as she walked hand in hand with Spike towards the Bronze. They were on their way to meet the gang before heading off to locate this not quite human ritual expert Spike had mentioned after a pleasant afternoon at her house with her family.

Dawn had of course irritated her, constantly asking Spike questions and blushing every time he smiled at her or called her Niblet but she refused to feel jealous. After all Dawn couldn’t help her teenage hormones going into overdrive at the hotness that was Spike and as long as she kept her mits off Buffy could put up with it. Dinner had been great, way more comfortable than she would have thought with her vampire boyfriend at the table but they’d had pleasant conversations and found themselves having a lot of fun together. This had inevitably led to Joyce inviting Spike to come to dinner more often which Buffy was delighted about as the unfamiliar domesticity of having her boyfriend sit and entertain her Mom and sister while throwing her loving smiles and holding her hand was something she was looking forward to repeating as often as possible.

“So how long we plannin’ on stayin’ pet?”

“Not long, just saying hi to everyone, test the waters. Anyone would think you didn’t wanna go,” she teased.

He squeezed her hand and sighed.

“Well after the last time I saw ‘em I think you can forgive me for not bein’ too keen to meet up with ‘em again. I know I know, be civil, try to be nice. I will but it’s not gonna be easy. ‘Sides,” he tilted his head to look at her, “can’t blame me for wantin’ to get this visit with demon guy over with so I can get you somewhere private an’ we can finish talkin’. Seem to remember you had somethin’ you wanted to say…an’ I definitely know a few ways we could be spendin’ our time together. Ways I could show how much I missed you.”

She felt her heart flutter and her breathing sped up at the knowing look he was giving her. She wanted them to have some alone time too. But meeting her friends was important, the first in many steps they had to take to build trust and get them working together as a unit again. She was already optimistic that Willow had been the first to suggest a get together that was typically a group thing involving Spike. She just wasn’t sure about Xander and tonight would indicate if he and Spike could at least reach a common ground with each other.

***

The Bronze was actually pretty busy even though it was still fairly early in the evening. They made their way through the crowd looking for her friends when she spotted Willow’s red hair at a table near the stairs. They headed over and she saw that Tara, Xander and Anya were all there. They looked up as the blonde duo approached and Willow waved. Buffy waved back and tugged on Spike’s hand to lead him over to the table, he was hesitant but allowed her to drag him over. There was no way he was getting out of this, he couldn’t avoid them forever.

Xander saw Spike had actually shown up. He had kind of hoped to avoid these sort of meetings for a while but knew if he was going to stay Buffy’s friend he had to learn to deal. He was still working on the whole acceptance thing though and couldn’t help the scowl that crossed his face as he looked down at the table.

“Great. Bleach boy’s here.”

He felt the icy glares the three women at the table threw him and shifted uncomfortably.

“I told you he was coming Xand. Remember the whole point of this is to celebrate the fact Buffy’s Mom’s okay and show we can give Spike the chance he deserves. Now try to be nice or at least cut the name-calling please?” Willow begged.

The witch knew this was a real test for her oldest friend. He had a lot of issues to work through but she really hoped he could get over his hatred for Spike. She didn’t want her best friends to drift apart because Xander was an ass.

“I got it, sorry. I promise to at least keep my mouth shut if I feel the urge to bad-mouth him come on okay?”

Willow had no time to answer as Buffy and Spike reached them so instead she turned a bright smile in their direction.

“Hey guys. Have a seat, I’m glad you made it.”

Spike snorted a little under his breath. Red was clearly tryin’ to make amends for what had happened when she first heard the news Spike was Buffy’s boyfriend. He still hadn’t forgotten how self-absorbed she’d been but she was doin’ her best so the least he could do was let her. Buffy wanted him to get along with ‘em after all. So he’d make his piece with Red, Tara and Anya he had no problem with, but a look at Xander told him all he needed to about where he stood with the git. The brunette was obviously struggling not to make some scathing remark about Spike’s presence and Spike had an overwhelming urge to provoke him, not forgetting what he’d said to Buffy, how he’d hurt her. Only the knowledge that doing so would hurt her more stopped him. If the whelp could try play nice then he could too. The tension between them couldn’t be helped though.

“Red. Thanks for the invite. Glinda, Anya,” he nodded at them each in turn and paused to look at Xander, who drew in breath before looking at him with a fraction less hostility than normal, “Xander.”

The others watched nervously at the interaction. Male testosterone was making itself painfully known and they waited with baited breath for Xander’s response. It was one of the rare, if ever, occasions Spike had used the young man’s name instead of an insulting nickname which was mildly promising.

“Spike.”

They held each other’s eyes for a minute and then looked away. Xander sipped his beer and Spike put an arm around Buffy looking back at the wiccans. Everyone released a sigh of relief. Buffy smiled at Spike gratefully and he rubbed his hand down her back in acknowledgement.

“Get you a drink pet?”

“Please.”

He bent down to drop a kiss on her head before heading off to the bar and Buffy took a seat between Willow and Anya. Willow leaned in to Buffy.

“I’m happy to see you two made up. So far so good right?”

“Yeah, they had me worried for a minute but they seem to be okay.”

Anya decided to join in on the conversation.

“Don’t worry. Xander’s under strict instructions not to give Spike a hard time tonight. If he knows what’s good for him he’ll do as he’s told.”

Buffy grinned, she was really starting to like Anya.

“Thanks, that goes ditto for Spike.”

The two women shared a giggle just as Spike got back with Buffy’s drink, a beer of his own in hand.

“What’s so funny?”

“Nothing,” they both answered innocently.

Spike threw them a curious glance as he sat next to Buffy, beside Anya. He glanced at Xander who shrugged but looked quizzically at the girls who suddenly seemed to be getting along so well. Tara and Willow smiled. Everyone had someone now and it seemed to be bringing certain members of the gang together even if the male portion of the group were a bit reluctant to be hanging out with each other.

After spending a little while discussing Joyce’s health and how things with Glory were going the girl’s decided a dance was in order. Spike declined and Buffy pouted.

“Come on, dance with me. We have to go work soon, we should have a little fun first.”

“Pet I’d love to dance with you, I’d just rather hold out for some good music yeah? Anyway I love watching you move, reminds me of the first time I saw you. I’ll just get a drink and sit this one out alright?”

Buffy frowned before glancing at her friends on the dance floor gesturing for her to join them.

“Fine, but you’d better dance with me when the next song comes on. We can’t stay much longer and for once, I’d like to take the opportunity to dance with you that involves actual, literal dancing.”

She bent to kiss his cheek before sashaying away to join her pals and Spike watched her go with a ridiculous grin on his face.

I could get used to this.

He went to fetch himself another beer before heading back to their table and settling in to watch Buffy dance. His mind wandered back to that first night in the Bronze when he’d gone in search of the Slayer. He’d been drawn to her instantly. He’d surprised himself when the typical driving thought of hunt, kill had left his mind as he watched her move seductively to the beat of the music. He’d desired her, and had never stopped, instead it had grown into love.

He didn’t notice Xander at first until a hand waved in front of his face and he blinked, noticing the young man had joined him at the table. His defences went up instantly. He would do his best to get along with the pillock for Buffy’s sake but there were no guarantees that would last if they were alone. Without the others around things could get out of hand and Spike waited, wondering what made the git approach him. He obviously had something he wanted to say.

“Thought you were dancing.”

“Yeah well I felt a bit outnumbered by the women, not that being surrounded by beautiful girls is something I’d normally turn down but I think we should talk.”

Spike bit back a comment about Xander seeming enough of a girl to fit in with the others and sat back giving him his full attention but narrowing his eyes as he thought about the kind of conversation Xander might have in mind.

“Yeah? What about?”

Xander seemed to consider what he wanted to say for a minute before looking Spike dead in the eye, his tone serious when he answered.

“I don’t like you.”

Spike snorted.

“Kinda picked up on that. Don’ worry, feelin’s mutual.”

“Figured. Look, I’m trying to be straight with you here. I don’t like you and I’m not sure I ever will but Buffy’s my friend and I want it to stay that way. Since she seems to want you for reasons that still baffle me I’m gonna do my best to deal, and I know you will too. I know you have a thing for her but I wasn’t sure…you really love her?”

Spike reigned in his temper and stared coldly at one of his least favourite people.

“We’ve been through this before. Yes. I love her. I love her and have no intention of ever not lovin’ her.”

“Just making sure.”

Xander sat back and took a gulp of his beer, picking at the label on the bottle while Spike continued to stare at him.

“If you hurt her I’ll stake you, you know that right?”

“If I ever hurt her I’d have dusted myself before you got the chance. Oh and if you ever hurt her again, I can guarantee the chip won’t bloody well stop me rippin’ you apart.”

Xander took this in seriously and nodded.

“So we understand each other then?”

“Yeah I guess we do.”

They sat in silence drinking and thinking what a strange situation they’d found themselves in for a while before Spike decided to turn his attention to something more pleasant, like his girl having fun. He searched the area in front of the stage for her and stiffened.

Buffy was separated from the others, her back to him, talking to a guy. Spike’s eyes narrowed as he took in the bloke’s appearance. Tall, broad, brunette with big puppy dog eyes. Spike’s nostrils flared and Xander looked up and watched with interest and a little fear when he noticed Spike’s reaction to seeing Buffy talking to another guy. He looked over and saw the guy lean in closer, smiling, to say something to Buffy over the noise of the music and she laughed. When he looked back across the table Spike was gone.

***

Buffy was having fun dancing and didn’t notice Xander leaving their group. She could feel Spike watching her and she made her movements more seductive as she put on a show for him. She vaguely noticed some guys nearby sneaking closer but ignored them. She was only interested in one guy. Hoping to discourage them she moved closer to the other girls signalling that this was a man-free zone. That’s when she remembered Xander and looking around saw he was gone. She turned to Anya and frowned mouthing ‘where’s Xander?’ Anya pointed to their table and Buffy looked over confused. Her eyes went wide when she saw Xander sitting down and engaging Spike in conversation.

“Oh well that can’t be good.”

Anya leaned in to Buffy.

“He said he had to talk to him. I hope they don’t hurt each other but they seem to just be talking.”

“Who knows how long that will last though.”

She moved as people blocked her view, trying to see around them and saw the guys stare each other down.

“I should really go over there before things get ugly.”

“Alright, I’ll help.”

They started to move forward when Buffy felt someone grab her arm. She turned around ready to face one of the guys from earlier and tell him she wasn’t interested when she recognised who it was.

“Buffy hey, how are you?”

“Ben! Wow I didn’t think I’d run into you here. I’m great how are you?”

“Trying to relieve some stress after a long shift at the hospital. How did your Mom’s check-up go?”

“Really well actually. They said she’s recovering just fine and if things keep going well she’ll be back at the Gallery in no time.”

“Glad to hear it.”

Anya watched the exchange and quickly got bored. After glancing over at the table to see that Spike and Xander weren’t about to rip each other to shreds she shrugged and walked back over to Willow and Tara. Buffy was so surprised to see Ben outside of the hospital and so caught up in conversation about her Mom to notice.

“Thank you by the way, for all your help. Coping with Mom and the doctors, and taking care of Mom. You were a real friend and I really appreciate your support.”

“Oh no, listen, your Mom’s great. I took a real liking to her and even if taking care of patients is a doctor’s job sometimes people forget the families. I don’t get why but it happens, I guess it’s what they deal with every day but I can’t help feeling someone should be there with the people in the waiting rooms too. You and your sister had lots of people who care about you but I could tell the whole situation was new and daunting for you. Having to answer some of those medical questions when your Mom’s sick is a lot to take in. I just did what I could to help.”

“Well I still really appreciate it. I know Mom and Dawn did too.”

“Dawn’s a sweet kid, sorry, teenager, I remember how much she hates being called a kid.”

Buffy laughed.

“Believe me I know. I hear about it every day.”

Ben grinned and was leaning in to say something else when he looked behind her and straightened up a bit. Buffy wondered what he was looking at and was about to turn round when a firm hand grasped her hip and another slipped around her waist, pulling her back against a hard body. She felt his cool breath on her neck and shivered though it had nothing to do with the cold.

“Who’s your friend luv?”

His voice was low and seductive and she tilted her head to look over her shoulder at him. He’d spoken into her ear and when she turned it brought their mouths close together and her brain forgot what he’d asked as she stared at that tantalizing full lower lip of his.

“Um…uh…”

She dragged her focus away from his lips to his eyes which were fixed icily on Ben. She remembered who she’d been talking to before Spike had come over and turned her attention back to the intern who was shifting uncomfortably under the glare the other man was giving him and was clearly awkward being in front of the obviously intimate couple.

“Oh, um Ben this is Spike, Spike, Ben, he’s an intern at the hospital. He helped me out with Mom and Dawn and the other doctors when she was sick.”

Ben held out his hand but quickly removed it when Spike ignored the gesture, preferring to keep his hands on Buffy.

“That right.”

He lowered his gaze to Buffy who stared back at him, her heart rate increasing as her eyes locked with his heavy-lidded blue ones, once again noticing how close their lips were.

“Why don’ we have that dance now sweet? Promised you the next one after all an’ then we can get outta here.”

Once again the English language failed her as her thoughts went straight to kissing those irresistible lips of his.

“Uh huh,” she nodded, as it was the only way she was capable of answering in her current state.

Ben lowered his head and scratched his neck as he stepped back away from them.

“Okay, well, it was nice seeing you Buffy. Nice meeting you Spike. I’ll just…go now.”

Spike flicked his gaze up at Ben and smirked at him, Buffy still in a trance in his arms, oblivious to Ben and everything else around them.

“Yeah you too mate,” he turned back to Buffy, noticing with pride that her attention was all on him, “C’mon luv, time for that dance.”

He led her back to a more private area of the dance floor where they had some room to move, away from the intern she’d been talking to. He spun her around so she was facing him and moved both hands down to her hips, pressing her against him, his head lowered so their foreheads were touching as she looked up at him. Buffy slid her arms up to circle his neck and brushed her fingers over the little curls in his hair there. They swayed to the music for a while before Buffy actually took in what had just happened. She smiled knowingly up at him.

“That wasn’t very nice you know.”

“What wasn’t?”

“Making Ben feel all awkward like that and refusing to shake his hand. There was no need to be jealous Spike, he’s just a friend.”

“Who said I was jealous? Anyway, would do him good to remind him you are jus’ friends. Wasn’ quite sure he got that message.”

“Well I’m sure he read it loud and clear that time then. Could you have been any more ‘possessive hands off’ guy if you tried?”

“Sure I could. Could have gone all cave man like an’ jus’ picked you up an’ carried you off.”

“You know I’m actually surprised you didn’t?”

“Well if it’s what you’d prefer pet I could always swoop you up an’ walk out of here right now.”

She laughed and he grinned back at her. This was nice. Dancing with each other. It was right. Buffy felt the urge to tell him how she felt. She became serious and he studied her.

“Spike…”

***

The Scoobies had been watching from their table as Spike and Buffy danced together. Willow and Tara were sitting close together holding hands and smiling as they watched the couple. Suddenly it didn’t seem so weird to see them together like that. Anya was resting her head on Xander’s shoulder. He still didn’t look too happy about it but he could see how much Buffy cared about the vamp and how protective he was of her. He still wasn’t sure about Spike being able to love but looking at them now, he had to concede that the guy looked pretty damn smitten. Whatever was between them was serious and he knew now more than ever he was going to have to learn to get used to Spike.

A phone started ringing and Anya sat up straight rooting through her bag.

“Who the heck could be calling me, you’re all here?”

The others watched interested as she answered the phone and struggled to hear whoever was on the other end. She looked up at them, a frown on her face.

“It’s Giles, he wants Buffy, it sounds urgent.”

***

Buffy looked up into Spike’s eyes, ready to lay her heart out in the open. He would deserve her love and return it. She didn’t have to hide from him.

“…I lo…”

“Buffy!”

They turned to Xander, Spike scowling and Buffy slumping defeated, wondering if she was ever going to get a chance to tell him.

“What is it Xander?”

“Giles is on the phone. He wants to talk to you. It sounds serious.”

They shared a look before rushing over to the table where Buffy took the phone from Anya.

“Giles what…?”

Spike watched while the Slayer listened to what the older man was saying. Her eyes went wide and she dropped the phone. She turned and grabbed Spike by the arm, clearly panicked.

“We have to go now!”

“Buffy what…?”

“Now!”

She dragged him out of the Bronze and he had no choice but to follow. Something was seriously wrong. The others jumped up concerned but the duo had forced their way through the crowd faster and were gone. Anya picked up the phone but Giles had hung up. They were really worried and wondered what could have had Buffy so panicked.

Chapter 23

Spike hurried to keep up with Buffy. She was running, clearly in a panic, and he hadn’t the slightest idea what the cause was.

“Buffy what is it? What happened?”

“Giles’ journal was stolen. All his notes were in there.”

“And what’s so important in the Watcher’s diary to get you so worked up? Where are we even going?”

“Home. We’re going home. I have to check on Dawn.”

“The Niblet? Buffy what…?”

“I don’t have time to explain right now Spike. I need to get to her, and, I have to know she’s all right. I just have to be there.”

“Okay, okay, just calm down I’m sure she’s fine.”
Buffy couldn’t calm down though. Someone had taken Giles’ journal, which meant someone knew the truth about Dawn. Her sister was in danger, and right now, Buffy’s priority was to protect her.

They eventually reached her house. Everything seemed quiet, but Buffy had to see for herself that everything was okay. She burst through the front door and started shouting for her sister. Joyce rushed out of the living room startled and nervous.

“Buffy, what is it, what’s wrong?”

“Dawn! Where is she?”

“She’s in her room, Buffy…”

“Dawn!”

Buffy headed for the stairs. Spike stood in the hall and looked at Joyce, shaking his head. He had no idea what was going on.

“What, what is it?” Dawn made her way downstairs as Buffy was about to race up them.

“Oh thank God. You’re okay.”

“Why wouldn’t I be? What’s going on?”
Buffy didn’t know how she could explain this to Dawn, but she was relieved just to see she was okay. Joyce didn’t look as comforted. She knew the truth about Dawn and for Buffy to have reacted like that something bad must have happened.

“Buffy, what happened?”
Buffy looked at the three faces staring back at her. Dawn was suspicious and confused. Her mother was frightened, and Spike was completely baffled. She turned to Dawn, but, she just couldn’t tell her the truth, that she didn’t exist. How could she?

“Dawn, go upstairs and stay in your room. Okay.”

“But what?”

“Please, Dawn.”

“No! Something’s going on here. Why were you so worried, and, what happened?”

“Giles called Anya at the Bronze to tell me about…a demon that was headed here. It attacked him and was coming after me…something Glory sent. I had to be sure you were all okay. Just go upstairs, okay? I have to…deal with this.”

“Dawn didn’t look as though she fully believed her sister, but after glancing at Joyce who nodded in agreement and casting one last suspicious glare at Buffy, she went back upstairs.”
Buffy turned back to her mother who was clearly waiting for answers.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to scare you like that.”

“Is there really a demon coming here?”

“No…maybe…I don’t know. Giles did call but he wasn’t attacked. His journal was stolen. It has stuff in it…about…”
Joyce’s eyes widened in realization.

“The Key.”

Buffy’s shoulders slumped, as she shared her Mom’s concern.

“Yeah, the Key.”

“Hang on.”

Both women turned to Spike who raised a hand to get their attention.

“So Rupes has some information about the Key written in this diary o’ his? I thought we didn’ know anythin’ ‘bout the Key? And what’s all this got to do with Dawn?”
Buffy had meant to tell him earlier, but hadn’t had the chance. She didn’t like doing it now with Dawn upstairs, but he had to know. Come to think of it, now someone else had the information it was probably better that her friends knew too. There was no point protecting them if it wasn’t much of a secret anymore was there?

“Can we all sit down first?”

They all moved into the living room, and Joyce and Buffy sat down. Spike, however, preferred to stand and leaned against the wall waiting.

“Well?”

“When I first met Glory, the Monk she was torturing told me about the Key before he died. I only told Giles because at the time he was the only one I trusted enough with the information, and I was scared of what Glory would do to anyone she thought was keeping secrets from her. Mom found out by circumstance because of…her illness. The Key was sent to me about six months ago for protection. They had to guarantee I’d protect it with my life. They altered everyone’s memories, so no one would notice the difference. A lot of what we think we remember isn’t real, or at least…it’s different.”
Spike took this in, but still looked confused. If anything, what she said just raised more questions.

“So everyone was affected? Even me?”

“You and anyone else that’s been directly involved with the Summers family I guess.”

“So what…you have the Key and everyone thinks it’s somethin’ you’ve had all along? Somethin’ you’d protect?”
He paused, and his eyes hazed over in thought as he took it all in. Buffy had the feeling he was figuring things out.

He is annoyingly perceptive after all.

She decided to spell things out just in case.

“They knew the one thing a Slayer would protect was a human, so they made the Key human. But just to be extra positive I’d do anything in my power to keep it safe, they made it out of me, made a sister. Dawn is the Key.”
A hush fell over the room as Spike absorbed her words, and Joyce glanced at the stairs, thinking of her youngest daughter, who somehow wasn’t real, even though she felt as though she had to be. She was her little girl just like Buffy was.

“Bit’s not real? But she…”

“I know. Trust me…I know, but it’s true.”
Spike looked at the floor, and Buffy contemplated their situation. Someone out there knew, which meant Dawn wasn’t safe.

“So, I’m guessin’ whoever took the Watcher’s notebook knows too, an’ we should prepare for a fight soon.”

“If it’s Glory I don’t…I don’t know how to stop her.”

“We’ll figure it out. We still have that demon bloke to check up on. He might have somethin’ we can use.”

“I can’t leave, not now. What if she’s attacked?”

“I know, but we can’t sit here waitin’ for ‘em either. You need to let the others know. Get the witches to do some protective spells or somethin’ to up your defenses.”

“Yeah, I’ll call them. The sooner they know the better. Maybe, we can figure out who took it.”

“When they get here I’m goin’ to check this lead out an’ see what I can dig up.”
Buffy’s head snapped up at that.

“By yourself?”

“I’m a big boy Slayer, an’ I can take care of myself. Besides, you need to stay here. I’m more use goin’ out to get info than sittin’ here with you. You’ll have the witches around for support.”

“But you’re strong. You can help me fight Glory. So far I‘ve been lucky, even both of us might not be enough, but we might at least stand a chance. I need you to protect Dawn. Protect her like you protect me.”
Spike came over and squatted in front of Buffy, raising a hand to brush the hair out of her eyes and cup her cheek. Joyce silently stood and went into the kitchen where she filled the kettle and put it on, leaving the Slayer and vampire alone.

“I swear to you I’ll protect her Buffy. Until the end of the world. All three of you Summers women. You’re my family and I intend to do everythin’ in my power to keep you safe. For now the best thing I can do is see Doc. I’ll be right here with you after. Okay?”
She leaned in to his hand and placed her own over it. She knew he meant every word. Why had she never seen this side of him before? For about the millionth time she wondered how she could have been so blind. He meant everything to her too now. He was family, her family. She reached out her own hand and stroked his cheek, feeling her heart flip at the gentle smile he gave her.

“I love you.”

It was strange how the words came so easy to her now. Before, she’d always found it so difficult to acknowledge the strength of her feelings and let others know how she felt. It didn’t feel like her, like the tough Slayer she had become to say such things. They were true though. She meant them, and it was fulfilling to say them, knowing it was mutual. She saw his love shining in his eyes every time he looked at her, and it just felt so easy to say it back.
Spike blinked. He opened his mouth, brow furrowing a little. Had he dreamed that?

Did she just…

“You…”

She smiled at him and leaned in to kiss him gently. She pulled back and stared straight into his blue gaze.

“I love you.”

It felt better every time she said it.

Spike looked so stunned. She had to resist a giggle. She’d floored him with those three little words. Words he never thought she’d say to him, no matter how hopeful he was.

“Buffy?”

She recognized the joy and uncertainty in his voice. She held his face in both her hands and tried to convey everything she felt though her eyes the way he did.

“I love you, Spike.”
He watched her for any sign of hesitation and found none. He looked into her green eyes and saw the warmth there.

The love…She loves me.

He pounced and she squealed in delighted surprise. She found herself lying back on the couch, Spike’s arms around her as he kissed every inch of her face.

“I love you Buffy. You really mean it don’ you? You love me. You love me.”
He dove for her mouth then and she felt dizzy from the sensations he was causing in her. He was putting everything he had into the kiss and she whimpered before giving everything she had in return. They broke away when she needed air and Spike continued to kiss her anywhere he could: her neck, her shoulder, her collar bone.

“I really mean it. I love you, Spike.”

“Never gonna get tired of hearin’ you say that, pet.”

“Never gonna get tired of saying it.”

He purred, and she grinned as she held onto him. She remembered what they’d been discussing and knew now wasn’t the time to celebrate no matter how much they might want to.

“Spike?”

“Hmm?”

“I really don’t want to stop this, but…I have to call Willow.”
He paused and slowly eased up to sit on the couch. She groaned at the loss of him against her, but sat up herself so they were side by side.

“Right. Almost forgot the slight problem of imminent danger we’re in. Sorry luv, you call Red, I’ll go check on your Mum, see if she needs a hand.”

“Okay. Thanks. God, I can’t wait until this is all over with so we can have some time to ourselves.”

“You an’ I both kitten.”
He chewed on his lower lip as he ran his hand through her hair again, and Buffy could see how happy he was. She smiled at him and reluctantly got up to make the call to who she knew would be an anxious and confused Willow after their sudden exit from the Bronze.

Spike watched her while she waited for Red to pick up, then glanced over at the kitchen where Joyce was moving around out of sight. He got up and went in to see her taking some mugs out of a cabinet.

“Need any help Joyce?”

“No thanks. I’ve got it. Would you like anything? Coffee, hot chocolate?”
She kept her back to him, her voice cheery but Spike could sense her distress. She was putting on a show, but he knew she was scared and worried for Dawn’s safety.

“Joyce.”

“I don’t think I have any marshmallows left, but I’ll check. Silly me, I should know better. Now you’re going to be making regular visits and all…”
Spike stepped around the island and grabbed her arm, turning her to him, and she avoided his gaze. He lowered his head, trying to get her to look up at him, which she did reluctantly.

“Joyce, I know you’re worried, but it’ll be okay. Buffy’s gonna get the witches to make this place nice an’ safe an’ I’m gonna find out what I can ‘bout this Glory bird, then we can put a plan into action to stop her. Buffy always comes out on top an’ this’ll be no exception.”

“But this is different. This is a hell god Spike. How do you stop something like that? And she’s after Dawn, my baby…both my girl’s are in danger and Dawn isn’t…I can’t believe…”
She hid her face in her hands as it all became too much. Her youngest daughter wasn’t real. They were all in danger from a god that Buffy couldn’t fight, and now, someone out there knew Dawn was the Key and would be coming after them.

“I know it’s pretty rough now Joyce, but I promise we’ll do everythin’ we can. They don’ look like much but those Scooby friends o’ Buffy’s are pretty tough an’ so is she. They’ll think o’ something’. An’ I’m speaking from experience here. Not to mention, Buffy’s got me on her side, an’ I won’ let anythin’ happen to any o’ you. Dawn’s the Key. It’s hard to believe, but this is the Hellmouth, an’ we have to learn to stop bein’ surprised by this stuff. Besides it doesn’ change that she is. She’s still your daughter right?”
Joyce nodded and hugged herself as she listened to him.

“An’ nothin’s gonna change that. Whatever she was before, whatever reality was doesn’ matter now. What matters is, she’s yours an’ you love her, an’ as far as she’s concerned you an’ Buffy are her family. That’s what’s important now, an’ that’s why we’re gonna do everythin’ we can to protect her.”
Joyce looked up at him with watery eyes and laid a hand on his arm. She smiled and he returned it.

“Thank you, Spike.”
Buffy walked in just then and took in the scene of her mother and Spike curiously.

“Everything okay?”

Spike turned to her and walked over to place an arm around her waist.

“Everythin’s fine pet. Red on her way?”

“Yeah, the whole gang actually. If something’s coming they want to be here to help. They’ll be here soon.”

“Good. I’m gonna have a quick smoke outside an’ check out the area, make sure nothin’s lurkin’ out there.”
He gave Joyce a wink, squeezed Buffy’s waist and left. Buffy turned back to her mother and raised an eyebrow inquisitively. Joyce smiled and stepped a bit closer to Buffy.

“Honey, whatever I said before about vampires, forget it. He’s a keeper. I assume you finally told him?”
Buffy blinked a couple of times wondering what that conversation had been about for her mother to be so pro-Spike. No matter how supportive she was before, vampire boyfriend’s were still not approved of, but now she seemed to be completely over the fact that Spike wasn’t the normal guy she’d always wanted her daughter to end up with.

“Uh, yeah, I told him I love him. You’re totally okay with this now?”

“Are you kidding? If I could find a guy like him I’d be the happiest woman in the world, even if he was a demon. Now come and help me get some snacks ready. If the whole gang is on their way they’ll need sustenance, particularly Xander.”
Buffy realized she wasn’t going to get any further explanation from her Mom and decided just to help out and wait for an opportunity to quiz Spike later. He came back inside when he’d finished his cigarette, with the Scooby’s in tow. Giles arrived soon after and Joyce went upstairs to keep Dawn company and make sure she was out of earshot, while the others gathered in the dining room for a meeting.The news that Dawn was the Key came as a huge shock to the Scooby

’s as was to be expected. Buffy felt a twinge of guilt when her friends looked upset that she’d hidden the truth from them, especially Willow after she’d promised her no more secrets. Giles defended her however, agreeing that at the time it had been the best course of action in keeping them safe and hiding the truth from Glory. They understood and Buffy went on to explain what had happened and the reason why she’d rushed out of the Bronze with Spike. They were all disheartened by the news, and Willow and Tara began working out what spells they could use to put up some powerful barriers around the Summers home. They’d brought some supplies after Buffy’d informed them she needed protection spells, strong ones.
When they were all up to speed, Spike moved from his spot against the wall to announce his departure.

“You’re leaving?” Xander asked.
Spike ignored the unpleasant tone in the boy’s voice as he answered.

“Gonna follow up on this lead we had. Now the rest of you are here it should be okay for me to go for awhile. We need what we can get since the Watcher’s books aren’ useful. I’ll be back as soon as I can.”
Buffy stood and walked him to the door. She stopped him before he opened it, laying a hand on his arm.

“Be careful.”

He tugged her toward him for a quick kiss and then pulled back, opening the door.

“I promise. See you soon luv.”

And then he was gone. Buffy stood staring at the closed door for a minute, wishing she could go after him, but knew she had to stay there. She went back to the others to continue making battle plans.

***

Spike knocked on the door warily. He could hear someone moving about on the other side before they finally approached, and the door swung open. Spike took in the harmless looking guy in front of him with his spectacles perched on his nose, smiling welcomingly. The bloke was short, shorter than Buffy even.

“Why hello there. Come in, come in, you have questions right?”

Spike studied the guy again before cautiously stepping inside.

“Uh yeah. Heard you were the bloke to ask ‘bout rituals an’ hell-gods.”
Doc smiled that unnerving cheery smile again and wandered around the small, cluttered room in his dressing gown, cocking his head from side to side as though looking for something.

“Right right, you want to know about Glorificus and the Key. Well there’s not much I can tell you I’m afraid. She’s searching to go home of course and needs the Key, which, could be anything. I did have a tome here somewhere that could fill you in on the details of how she was overthrown and banished if I can find the darn thing, but I don’t think you’re here for a history lesson, are you?”

“Not exactly. Was hopin’ you could fill in the details of that ritual she needs to do to get home?”
Doc turned to face Spike with an apologetic shrug.

“Sorry, I’m afraid I don’t have anything like that. It’s too well hidden, even for me. Of course, there are hundreds of rumours, but you can’t rely on them, and you’d need to be accurate if you wanted to prevent it. Say, don’t I know you from somewhere?”
Spike frowned and watched the guy. He was far too calm for Spike’s liking and dismissive, as though he knew exactly what Spike was after and was determined to stop him from getting it.

“Must be mistaken. I’ve never seen you before now.”

“You sure? I could swear you’re that guy that hangs out around the corner…No? I must be mistaken. You look just like him.”
Doc had moved all around the room while he talked and had settled in front of a desk that was as cluttered as the rest of the room. Spike glanced from the desk to Doc. That feeling he got in poker games was coming on again, the one he got right when he knew his opponent was bluffing.

“Well I really am sorry you wasted your time, but I can’t help you.”

“You’re lying. You know somethin‘…an’ I’m bettin’ whatever it is, is in that box you’re tryin’ to hide behind you right?”
Doc looked down at the box behind his back, then at Spike, removed his glasses and smiled. His reptilian tongue shot out of his mouth so fast it was little more than a blur and Spike had never been so happy to have vampire speed than at that moment. He narrowly avoided getting pushed backwards but received a stinging slash to his cheek. He growled and looked back at Doc tensing up for a fight. The smaller man’s eyes went black and he laughed before advancing, then his lethal tongue shot out again.

***

“Captain, are we ready?”

“Yes sir. The men are prepared for this battle. We surely have enough to overpower her this time.”

“Yes, now we know who to focus on. The girl must die. Gather the men for a final prayer before we attack. The Beast shall not succeed in destroying this world.”

In a small clearing in the woods a hundred Knights of Byzantium prepared to follow their General into battle. It was unthinkable that they would fail this time, not now when they had finally discovered the Key after keeping vigil so long over the Slayer’s followers. Even if they did die tonight and failed to destroy the Key, a thousand more would take their place. Nothing would stop them in their mission and nothing would get in their way. After a final prayer, they gathered their weapons and began marching towards their enemy.

Chapter 24

Joyce came downstairs to find Xander still stuffing his face with snacks even at this late hour, Anya sitting beside him watching T.V. and Willow and Tara walking in the door after finishing up a protection spell. Moving into the dining room she found Giles poring over some of his research books. He took off his glasses and rubbed his tired eyes as she entered the room.

“How’s it going?” Joyce looked at the stack of books Giles had laid out before him.

He jumped a little at the sound of her voice and smiled sheepishly.

“I’m afraid things aren’t really progressing at all. I’ve gone over the books dozens of times without any more information than we had already. I just hope Spike can find something of use before whoever stole my journal comes calling.”

“You and me both. Where’s Buffy?”

“Out back getting some air. Patience was never one of her strong points and this situation…I can tell she’s worried about him too. I know she would have preferred to have gone with him.”

Joyce nodded. She was worried as well, just like she was every time Buffy went out alone to patrol. Slayer or not, she was her daughter, and Joyce couldn’t help worrying. She would be happier to have Spike around to help Buffy, and now, she shared her daughter’s concerns for him.

“I’ll go talk to her.”

Joyce paused on her way out and looked over her shoulder at the Watcher.

“I’m glad you came to your senses and are willing to give him a chance. I know I never had the experience of having him as an enemy, but what matters now is who he is, not who he was. I trust him, and I hope you will too.”

She continued on out the back door, and Giles stared after her, considering her words. He had always dismissed much of what Joyce said regarding Buffy as the Slayer since she was always looking at things from a mother’s point of view, but she had some very good instincts, and he agreed with much of what she thought when it came to Buffy’s future. He was doing his best with this Spike situation, but Joyce’s opinion made him reconsider his view of the blond vamp. He decided to try even harder to see the good in him that Joyce and Buffy seemed to see. Tonight’s excursion would also be an example of the vampire’s willingness to help them with these apocalyptic threats.

Joyce found Buffy sitting on the back steps looking up at the cloudy sky. Wordlessly, she joined her daughter, and they sat there for a minute. Joyce knew she couldn’t ease Buffy’s fears, but she hoped she could at least give her comfort and support.

“It’s funny…”

Joyce looked over at Buffy who smiled as she spoke softly, as though unwilling to break the peaceful silence surrounding them.

“…last time, it was Spike out here comforting me, when you were going into the hospital. He came here ready for a fight, maybe even to try and kill me after…I said some really horrible things to him. I even told him to leave me alone when he got here, but he didn’t. He put aside all his anger at me and just sat here…comforted me. It was the first night I ever felt…ever realized the change, the man he could be. Now it’s you out here comforting me when I’m scared for him.”

Joyce leaned in and hugged Buffy, who raised an arm to cover her Mom’s.

“I know I shouldn’t be so worried. He can take care of himself. He’s lived a lot longer than I have, and been in a lot more danger. I’m just not used to feeling this way about him. I never cared before, and now, I can’t stand it when we’re apart. Add to that the thought something might be coming for us here, and you’ve got a Slayer who’s ready to climb the walls if something doesn’t happen soon. I don’t want us to get attacked but this waiting…”

“I know honey. You’re doing a good job though. I’ve never been more proud of you. You have to deal with so much more than anyone your age should, and I’m in awe of you. You protect me, Dawn, and your friends no matter what, and I’m happy you have someone who can protect you too. He’ll be fine. Spike’s a survivor.”

“Yeah.”

They sat for another minute or two before finally standing to head back inside. Buffy thought she saw movement out of the corner of her eye, and was just turning to look out at the backyard when there was a bright flash of light, and a siren began to wail at a deafening pitch. Both women covered their ears and ran inside, where the others had all jumped to their feet in alarm. Dawn thundered down the stairs, panic written all over her face.

“What is that? What’s going on?”

Tara rushed to comfort the frightened teen and explain.

“It’s a spell we set up. To alert us to danger. Something set it off. If anything comes here with the intent to attack the siren is triggered, and a barrier is raised. Only those attacking and the people inside the barrier can hear it.”

Buffy rushed to the window and looked out, quickly followed by Xander and Giles. They all felt a rising dread as they saw a swarm of knights picking themselves up off the ground and clutching their ears. They tested the barrier, beating it with their swords, and turned to a knight dressed in red garments, who seemed more official than the others.

“That must be the General,” Giles informed them.

They watched as he beckoned two men dressed in black robes with crosses around their necks forward. They raised their hands, and began chanting something as the siren died down. Buffy looked over at Willow questioningly.

“Once we’re alerted to danger the siren stops.”

“They did say they’d be back, and it looks like they’re organized. At least now we know who stole your journal. I don’t know whether to be relieved or not, that it isn’t Glory.”

“I’ll go with relieved considering we actually stand a chance against these guys,” Xander put in.

“Yeah I’m guessing you’re right. Will, how long will the barrier hold with those priests trying to bring it down?”

“I’m not sure, maybe an hour? It would hold longer normally, but, they look like they know what they’re doing.”

“We don’t have much time then. Think, is there anything we can do to stop them without a big battle? I know we can fight if we have to, but we’re outnumbered, and there’s no way we can take them all on at once like this.”

“Who are they, and why are they attacking us anyway? What was in Giles’ journal?” Dawn demanded.

Buffy ignored her, and Joyce tried to calm the youngest Summers down, but wouldn’t look at her.

“Well I might know a spell that could make them forget. It’s a little tricky, but I can pull it off with Tara’s help. It wouldn’t normally be used on so many at once, but it should erase their memories so they won’t attack us.”

“Sounds good, can you get working on it?”

“Yeah sure, let me just grab the ingredients, I know I have some here somewhere. I grabbed almost everything we had when you told us to come over just in case.”

“Wait, Willow!”

Willow stopped and looked at Tara who had grabbed her arm.

“What?”

“You can’t just do the spell verbatim like that. We don’t want to completely erase their memories of who they are, because it will make them all amnesiacs. We just want them to forget about what they know about the Key and fighting Buffy. If they forget about the Knight stuff, or even about Glory, that would be good too. We don’t want to completely erase them, we have to be specific.”

“You’re right. I know we can work it out though. Make some changes.”

Buffy turned to Tara.

“Could that work?”

Tara seemed to think it over a minute before nodding her head in agreement.

“Yeah, I think so.”

“All right. You two work on that. The rest of you pick your weapons and watch them. I want to be prepared if they break through. Mom, you and Dawn get upstairs and hide. Okay? Don’t let them see you.”

Joyce nodded and tried to pull Dawn towards the stairs, but the brunette refused to budge.

“Wait. Someone tell me what’s happening. They’re after the Key right? You said you didn’t have it, and you came in here earlier screaming my name, then said it was about some demon after you. Clearly you were lying. I want to know what’s happening.”

“Dawn, not now. We’re under siege here, in case you haven’t noticed.”

“But…!”

“Dawn! Just get upstairs.”

Buffy turned away and moved back to the window, cutting off any further conversation with her sister. Dawn looked around to all the other Scoobies who avoided her gaze, including Giles and her Mom. Tears pricking her eyes in frustration, she turned and fled up the stairs, slamming her door behind her. Joyce hesitated a moment before following.

“Buffy, shouldn’t we tell her?”

“Tell her what, Xand? That six months ago she didn’t exist? Just how do you suggest we do that?”

Xander stared at the floor with no answer. Buffy turned back to the window.

“Exactly. Now can we please keep an eye on these Knights?”

She struggled to keep her voice steady. Part of her agreed with him. It seemed inevitable she’d have to tell Dawn the truth. She just didn’t know how.

***

“You are doing well. I didn’t know vampires could be quite so agile. Well of course, I knew about their enhanced predatory abilities, but still, you’re fast to dodge me so quickly.”

“You don’ get outta my way you’ll see how quick I can be when I’m rippin’ your head off.”

“A sense of humour I see. You won’t last. You’re getting tired much faster than I am, and pulling my head off won’t be nearly as easy as you think. Not even with your vampire strength.”

Spike straightened and observed Doc. He hated to admit it, but the bloke was right. He couldn’t keep this up much longer, and it wasn’t getting him anywhere. He had to go on the offensive. He had to get that box. He judged the distance and pounced, aiming for the desk. Doc was faster, and with surprising accuracy, whirled and kicked out, sending Spike flying back into a cabinet to land behind a trunk, books and boxes falling down around him.

“Nice try vampire, but not good enough. I can see you’re going to be too much trouble to allow you to simply walk away, but I can get rid of what you and your friends are after, so I don’t have to worry about any more guests trying to stop Glorificus.”

Spike raised himself up to see Doc pick up the box and turn to the lit fireplace, pushing off the ground to stand up. His hand came in contact with something cold and sharp. Looking down, he saw a sword that must have been in the cabinet he’d just smashed into. Picking it up, he hurled himself at the demonic ritual expert and slashed out with the sword. The annoyingly fast bugger dodged however and sent his tongue flying out again to push Spike backwards. He spun, tossed the box into the fire, and turned back to his opponent grinning.

His delight was short-lived as Spike plunged the sword straight into his chest, giving it an extra twist just for the hell of it. Doc blinked back his demonic eyes, mouth dropping open in disbelief, and fell to the floor, blue-black blood oozing out of the gaping hole left by the sword. Spike rushed to the fire and plucked the smoldering box out, wincing as the flames licked his hands.

Sniffing and gripping the box steadily under one arm, he turned to face the door. Pausing, he glanced back at the prone figure lying amongst the scattered books and furniture. He walked over to the body, and kicked at it with a foot. Tilting his head in consideration, he studied the dead demon as it leaked an ugly mess onto the carpet.

“Sod it. Better safe than sorry.”

He raised the sword and brought it swinging down at the demon’s neck. Black eyes opened seconds before the sword cut through flesh and bone, decapitating it and cutting off the shriek that was rising in its throat. The head rolled away to the far side of the room, the body twitched and spasmed before going still once more.

“Knew he was bluffin’.”

Spike grinned, his thirst for violence satisfied, and headed out into the night back to his Slayer. Hopefully whatever he had would prove useful to them.

***

“How much longer guys?”

“We have it all worked out. We’re ready to do the spell. It will take a few minutes before it kicks in, but hopefully the barrier will hold that long.”

“Uh, guys? I don’t think that barrier’s as strong as you think.”

“What?”

Buffy moved past Anya to look outside, and saw with dismay that she was right. The priests were starting to bust a whole in the magical wall surrounding the house, and the Knights were eagerly clutching their weapons and stepping closer, anticipating the upcoming attack.

“Get that spell done now!”

Willow and Tara sat cross-legged facing each other, ingredients at the ready. They had a bowl containing some odd plants with pink flowers in the centre, and a clear crystal sitting next to them. They quietly chanted some words, a light breeze, magically conjured up around them, and blew through their hair as they uttered the spell, eyes closed. As they neared the end of the incantation, Tara lit a match and set fire to the plants in the bowl which burned green. Willow held the crystal towards the flame until it glowed as they finished the spell, hoisted themselves to their feet, and left the plants to burn away.

“That’s it?”

Willow pocketed the crystal and picked up a nearby sword, ready to help if they had to fight.

“Yup. Now we just have to wait for the crystal to turn black and the spell will take effect. As long as we make sure it doesn’t break, the Knights will completely forget about the Key, or having seen Giles’ journal. We decided having them remember about Glory would be better, since anyone fighting her would be welcome, and they’ll probably be safer if they know about her since I’m sure she knows about them.”

“Great. Any idea how long it will take to go into effect?”

“’Fraid not.”

“I’m guessing, not long enough.”

Buffy turned to Xander who was staring out the window. Buffy and the others pulled back the curtains, and saw that they’d finally managed to tear a hole in the barrier.

“Crap. Alright guys, get ready. Looks like we have a fight on our hands after all.”

They stepped back from the door, weapons raised, and waited. They didn’t have to wait long. As quick as they could rush through the barrier, the Knights attacked. The door was broken open, and they flooded into the house. Buffy rushed to meet them, a sword of her own in hand to fend them off.

“No mercy!” One of the Knights cried.

Buffy twirled and struck, her sword slashing across his back and causing him to arch backwards, screaming in pain.

“Okay then, if that’s the way you want it.”

The Scoobies were holding their own, having battled many monsters in the time they’d known the Slayer, but even the experience they’d gained over the years wasn’t enough to turn the tide on the sheer number of Knights attacking. Soon they were being pushed back into the house. Buffy spotted two Knights heading up the stairs.

“Oh no you don’t damn it.”

She fought her way over to them, raced up the steps, and hauled them back. One of the men tumbled awkwardly to the ground, blocking the way for any others. Buffy blocked the other’s attack and grabbed his arm, twisting it until she heard a satisfying snap, and he cried out, dropping his weapon. She kicked him through the banister and he landed on the ground with a thud.

“Buffy!”

Buffy looked up to see Dawn standing at the top of the stairs, Joyce grabbing her around the waist, trying to pull her back.

“Get back! Hide!”

“The Key!”

The three Summers women turned to the Knight who had spoken. He was staring up at Dawn and pointing at her with his sword. More Knights were turning their attention to the Slayer’s sister and fear gripped Buffy at the cold look in their eyes. She turned to her Mom and sister. Dawn was frozen in place with her eyes wide, staring back at the man.

“What?” she asked, her voice a breathy whisper.

“Destroy the Key!”

They sped towards her, and Buffy positioned herself firmly between them and her sister. Joyce dragged a stunned Dawn backwards into her bedroom and slammed the door shut. The Scoobies hurried to Buffy’s aide, trying to set up a barrier between the attacking Knights and the stairs, but were too late to stop a group who were making their way up the steps. The Slayer had the narrow stairway on her side, but was being pushed back by the force of her attackers. Things did not look good.

Xander let out a yelp as a sword slashed his leg and fell to the ground. Anya shouted his name, but was forced back by oncoming Knights. As a group of medieval men crowded around a fallen Xander, Willow and Tara shouted a spell to send them flying back while Giles went to help the young man. Buffy was being pushed further and further back towards her Mom’s bedroom where her sister and Joyce were trapped. One of the Knights lunged at her and Buffy stumbled backwards, falling to the floor. A sword was raised above her and she gasped as the Knight prepared to plunge it downwards.

Suddenly his eyes went blank and he fell to the floor. Buffy blinked and she and the others watched as each man fell to the ground where they had been standing, and the sounds of battle abruptly cut off, peace descending on Revello Drive once more. Slowly, she stood.

“What happened?” asked Xander.

Willow fumbled around in her pocket and pulled out the crystal. It had gone completely black.

“The spell finally kicked in. The force of it must have knocked them out.”

“So, when they wake up, they won’t remember anything about why they’re here, or who the Key is?” Buffy enquired.

“Pretty much, yeah.”

“Okay, in that case, I say we pile these guys up outside, and let them make their own way home. I could do without coming up with an explanation for why they’re all passed out in my house.”

After helping Xander to the couch, where Anya went about nursing his injured leg, the gang set about carrying each of the sleeping Knights of Byzantium outside. Soon there was an odd sight of sleeping men in medieval garb on the pavement of Revello Drive, and Buffy wondered how the neighbours would explain this one away to themselves. Living in Sunnydale meant its residents had a habit of ignoring what was right in front of their faces. It certainly made the Scoobies job of covering these incidents up much easier.

Giles and Buffy balanced the door precariously back in place, so it at least appeared closed from a distance. They had other things to worry about before fixing it. Xander winced as Anya cleaned the gash on his leg.

“How you doing Xand?”

“Oh, great you know, sword wound aside. Nothing I can’t handle.”

Buffy offered a small smile in response. That had been way too close. She could have lost a friend today. She observed her slightly damaged house and saw the broken stair rail lying on the floor. She could have lost a lot more than that.

***

Spike was halfway to Buffy’s house when he saw them. He stopped in disbelief and watched as Knights of Byzantium marched toward him. He briefly considered his options. He couldn’t fight them because of the chip. His best bet was to run for it. He reconsidered when he noticed the puzzled looks on their faces. They seemed to be rushing to get off the street, not liking being out in the open like this and a little lost as to what they were doing. Spike stood perfectly still and watched curiously as they walked passed him, avoiding eye contact.
What the bloody hell’s goin’ on now?

The smell of blood caught his attention. Many of the Knights were injured, but a particular scent had stood out momentarily. He closed his eyes and inhaled deeply, letting his vampire senses take over. His eyes popped open when he pin-pointed the source. Somewhere among the Knights was a sword with Xander’s blood on it.

Spike took off, racing the rest of the way to the Summers home. He wasn’t sure what had happened, but clearly there had been a battle between the Scoobies and the Knights, and Spike feared for his girlfriend and her family’s safety.

***

“Is it true?”

They all looked up as Dawn came downstairs, her face hard and eyes watery, betraying her emotion. Joyce followed her, looking at Buffy helplessly. Dawn stopped when she reached the bottom of the stairs, staring at her sister and slowly entered the living room to stand in front of her.

“Is. It. True?”

Buffy swallowed hard. She looked at Giles who was just as unsure and helpless as her Mom. The others gathered around, casting glances between Buffy and Dawn. Dawn stamped her foot to get Buffy’s attention.

“Don’t look at them, look at me! Answer me! Is it true? Am I the Key?”

“Dawnie…”

“Just tell me! I’m tired of you hiding things from me! Am I even real?”

“Of course you are, Dawn. You’re real…but…you’re also,” Buffy wiped away tears as she faced her crying sister. At least one of them had to be strong.

“You’re the Key too.”

Dawn’s bottom lip wobbled, and she stared at the floor. Joyce put a hand over her mouth, choking back sobs at her daughter’s distress. Buffy reached a hand out to Dawn, but she flinched away. When she spoke, her voice was full of venom.

“If I’m the Key then I’m not real. That’s what those guys said, that’s what Mom said. I’m just a thing, some mystical thing the monks hid from Glory. I’m not even related to you! I’m not related to anybody! I’m not…I’m not even human!”

Dawn dashed up the stairs, ignoring her Mom’s pleading for her to stop and listen. Buffy raced after her but the young teen had slammed and locked the door behind her, and Buffy’s knocking was only met with a scream for her to go away.

“Dawn! Dawn, please, open up, we have to talk about this. Dawn!”

There was no answer, but Buffy could hear her sister crying through the door. Joyce was sitting on the steps, her head in her hands as Giles did his best to comfort her. The Scoobies looked on anxiously. They were all startled when the door fell down on the floor again, revealing a concerned Spike. He stared at the door as he stepped around it, and then directed his gaze upward to where Buffy stood.

“Buffy, thank God, what happened? I jus’ saw a group o’ Knights marchin’ away from here in a daze with the whelp’s blood on one o’ their swords.”

“Hey!”

“Spike, you’re okay. The Knights took Giles’ journal. They came here to destroy the Key, and Willow did a spell to make them forget about Dawn. We had to fight until the spell took effect and Xander got hurt. But…oh, Spike, she knows.”

Buffy ran down to him and practically fell into his arms, relief at having him back mixing with her need for comfort.

“I’m a whelp? He’s still with the nicknames…Ow!”

Xander massaged the back of his head where Anya had slapped him, and glared as she made shushing motions. Everyone else ignored the display, their attention focused on the blond duo.

“She who, luv? Glory?”

“No, Dawn. She knows…she knows, she’s the Key.”

Spike rubbed her back and glanced at Joyce, noting her distraught look.

“Oh. I assume it wasn’t in a nice family chat, breakin’ it to her gently kind o’ way either, huh?”

Buffy just shook her head.

“Bugger.”

Chapter 25

“She won’t come down, Spike. She won’t open the door…she just won’t talk to me.” Buffy said, wringing her hands as she paced across the floor.

“Can’t exactly blame her luv. ‘S a lot to take in. Least she’s safe from the Knights now, yeah? Jus’ have to give her some time, let her calm down an’ try talkin’ to her. I know how you feel, but trust me, breakin’ her door down won’ help.”

“I know but, God, Spike, what must be going through her head…She doesn’t think she’s real.”

“Um, Spike?”

Spike looked up at the Watcher who was polishing his glasses and waited for him to perch them back on his nose, noticing the man had spied the box under his arm.

“Might that have come from your contact by any chance? You acquired something useful?”

Buffy stepped back out of his arms, noticing the box for the first time. She looked up at him with hope shining in her eyes, then frowned when she saw the red mark on his cheek. She brushed it with her hand gently.

“What happened?”

“Doc didn’ feel like helpin’. Turns out he was a follower o’ Glory. Had a little scrap o’ my own with him, an’ he tried burnin’ this. So yeah, I’m bettin’ it’s useful. Don’ worry ‘bout the cut luv, ‘s jus’ a scratch. Almost healed now anyway. Oh an’ Doc’s good an’ dead so we won’ be usin’ him as a contact in future, not that he would have helped anyway.”

“Well if he didn’t want you to have it, it’s highly likely that that box holds answers to stopping Glory or at least finding out about that ritual. May I?”

Spike handed Giles the box, and the man carried it to the coffee table, where they all crowded around. He was just about to open it when Spike stopped him.

“Hang on a sec.”

Giles was a little irritated, knowing important information was sitting right under his nose, but paused and glanced at the vampire who had his hand up to silence them. Buffy recognized the look of concentration on his face as he appeared to be listening for something.

“What is it? Another spy?”

“No. Buffy, I think we should check on your sis.”

“Why?”

Buffy was already headed for the stairs with Spike and the others following.

“Because I can’t hear a heartbeat comin’ from upstairs.”

“What?!” several voices exclaimed.

“No she’s not dead, jus’…”

Buffy broke through the door and they all stared at the empty room. The curtains were blowing gently inward by the open window.

“…gone,” Spike finished.

***

Dawn hugged herself tightly, ignoring the cold night air as she marched onwards, not really sure where she was going. She just had to get away. Away from them. Her family, her friends. She brushed angry tears away. Not her friends, not her family. She was nothing but a tool for that Hell-bitch to use to end the world. What sort of horrible, evil thing was she if she brought about an apocalypse? Why did they lie to her for so long?

Buffy should have just let them kill me. It would be better than whatever Glory’s got planned, and Buffy knows she can’t stop her.

She just kept walking, a million thoughts running through her head. Eventually she cooled off enough to take in her surroundings and realized she was headed for the rough part of town, so not a place she wanted to be, no matter how upset she was.

Just as she was trying to think of where she could go a figure jumped out in front of her. She screamed and jumped back but stopped at the sight of a knife. At first she thought it might be a vampire, but the knife clued her in that it was a mugger, a human, someone much more unpredictable.

“Please, don’t hurt me. I...I don’t have any money…I...I’m just a kid, please.”

“Shut up. You expect me to believe you’re out here alone at night without any cash? I’m sure you have something worth handing over.”

“I don’t, I swear!”

“Well, we’ll just have to see about that, won’t we?”

Dawn panicked. He was advancing on her. She didn’t know what to do, if she had any money she’d give it to him but she was telling the truth. Whatever happened to her could be much, much worse than losing some jewelry or a few dollars. Her flight instinct took over and she ran.

“Hey, get back here you little bitch!”

She could hear him chasing her. Luckily she had a lot of experience running away from scary things lately, but he was fast, he would catch her at this rate. She had to get somewhere safe, somewhere there were people.

She ran as fast as she could. She turned one corner and ran straight into the street. Bright lights hit her vision and she froze in place, momentarily blinded as a car horn blared. She shielded her eyes and was just in time to see the vehicle swerve, narrowly avoiding her and pulling to a stop on the curb. She watched as the owner of the car got out and stood to face her.

“Are you okay? That was close, what were you doing?”

“Ben?”

The man paused and looked at her closely.

“Dawn? What are you doing out here, at this time of night by yourself?”

Remembering her attacker, Dawn turned but no one was there. He must have backed off when he saw the car stop.

“I was…there was…this guy was chasing me, and he had a knife.”

“Are you hurt? What happened?”

Ben rushed over to her, taking her arm and leading her to his car.

“No, he didn’t hurt me. I ran away, but he was following me and…”

“Easy, come on, I think it’s time I took you home.”

“No! No, I can’t go back there. Please, I-I don’t want to go home yet.”

He stared at her worried. She looked back pleadingly. She couldn’t go home to them. She didn’t know how to face them. They’d lied to her, and they weren’t her family.

“Okay, but I think you’re in shock. You should come with me to the hospital and calm down. Then we’ll decide what to do about going home, all right?”

She nodded. Anything was better than going home or staying out here any longer. She let him lead her to the car, and they sat in silence on the way to the hospital. It crossed her mind to wonder why he’d been out so late, but figured he must have been called in for a late shift or something. She stared out the window the whole drive, wondering what she was supposed to do now.

***

“I swear I’m gonna kill her if Glory hasn’t already!”

The Slayer marched onward purposefully though she had no idea where she was supposed to be going. Upon discovering her missing sister, she’d gathered the group together to look for her. Joyce had been convinced to stay at home with Anya after a quick argument, where Buffy had firmly put her foot down against her Mom going out to search for the missing teen. Having Spike around came in handy once again as he followed Dawn’s scent, pointing Buffy in the right direction wherever Dawn had made a turn. Xander had made a comment about him being better than a bloodhound which they all ignored, even when he insisted it had been a compliment. So far they hadn’t closed the gap, and Buffy really wanted to know where her sister was.

“We’ll find her, Slayer. Shouldn’ take long to catch up, even if she does walk as quick as you when she’s mad.”

“Yeah Buff. She’ll get scared and lonely out here and before you know it your Mom will be calling to say she’s back.” Xander tried to reassure the Slayer.

“Then I can march straight home and murder her,” the Slayer said, in a voice that sounded almost like a growl.

“Um, Buffy, I get you’re mad and all, but Dawn just found out she’s not, technically, real. How would anyone deal with that?”

“I know that, Will. I do. God, I tried to come up with a way to tell her that wouldn’t result in---this, but there’s no way to explain that to a person without them freaking out. I’m worried that’s all, and she knows better than to run off, even if she is upset. She knows what’s out there. Not to mention we’re heading towards the bad part of town now.”

Spike half listened to the conversation, concentrating on tracking the Niblet’s scent. He paused as it crossed with someone else’s. Said someone then appeared to follow Dawn. He frowned, resisting the urge to growl, knowing it would worry Buffy more, but he didn’t like the new development.

“Spike what is it? Why did you stop?”

“Did you lose her?” Giles asked, from the back of the group where he had been trying to ignore Xander’s occasional prattling.

“No. She went that way, jus’ someone followed her.”

“What?”

Buffy didn’t like the sound of that. She set off quickly in the direction Spike had pointed out, practically jogging. He hurried to match her pace, and the others followed, almost having to run to keep up. Spike took the lead as Dawn’s trail began twisting and turning, almost as though she was running from something. Spike was really getting worried, the strange scent still following hers. This time he did growl.

Eventually they reached a road where Spike stopped again. Buffy watched as he paced back and forth for a minute before finally looking up at her.

“Well?”

“Trail ends here.”

“How could it end here? Where is she Spike?”

“Got into a car I think. Scent’s familiar somehow but I can’t…It isn’t the same as the one followin’ her. She met someone. Bloody hell, I know I know that scent.”

“Spike who did she go with? Who’s with my sister?”

They all watched as he closed his eyes and concentrated. He seemed to battle with himself for a minute, struggling to remember before his eyes popped open.

“Bloody hell!”

“What?” they all chorused.

“That pillock from the Bronze, one you were chattin’ to---what’s it, the intern bloke.”

“Ben?” Buffy asked in disbelief.

What had Ben been doing out here after the Bronze? Surely he’d have been home by now? Why would he have taken Dawn? Was she hurt?

“If it’s Ben, maybe he took her to the hospital with him,” Willow suggested.

“Let’s go. I hope she’s all right. Damn it Dawn.”

They set off at a brisk pace for the hospital. It was their only shot. Spike wondered how this Ben guy got the Bit to trust him so easily, and why he hadn’t just brought her home like any other supposedly responsible adult. He didn’t know why but there was something about that bloke’s scent he didn’t like. It was off, which was how he’d finally recognized it. There was just something he didn’t trust about it.

***

“Feeling better?”

Dawn sipped her drink, sitting opposite Ben in a quiet room in the hospital. He’d gotten her some food from the vending machine, and they ate in silence while he drank his coffee, casting curious glances her way every so often.

“So are you gonna tell me why you’re so against going home? I’m sure your Mom and your sister are worried sick.”

“Worried, yeah, I bet they are. I just can’t deal with them right now. Sometimes I hate having a sister.”

Who was she kidding? She didn’t have a sister. She was just a thing Buffy had to protect. All this time she’d been blaming her screwed up life on her sister being the Slayer, when really, she was the one screwing up her so-called sister’s life now.

“Yeah, I can sympathize with that.”

Dawn looked up at him, curious.

“You have a sister?”

“Yeah, believe it or not I’m a little brother. Sometimes it was as if everything revolved around her. Actually, not much has changed. She only cares about me doing what I’m told. I’m just an inconvenience to her.”

“I get that feeling. It’s like I’m just in the way. Buffy’s the one that matters.”

“It’s tough being the youngest. But Dawn, your sister seems to care a lot about you. She does notice you. I even saw her at the Bronze tonight, and she thanked me for spending time with you when she was busy with your Mom. She does think about you.”

“She just likes to make sure someone’s on Dawn duty. She hardly ever spends time with me. Has too much else on her plate. You were at the Bronze tonight?”

“Yeah. I drove some friends home and was on my way back home myself when I met you. Uh, Dawn, if you don’t mind me asking, the reason Buffy’s been busy, the reason you ran away, does it…have anything to do with…your sister’s boyfriend?”

Dawn blinked confused and looked at Ben who was waiting for her answer, concerned looking.

“What? Spike? Why would it have anything to do with him?”

Ben shifted a little uncomfortably.

“Nothing I guess. I just thought, maybe--he looks a little--rough.”

“Who, Spike? No way. I mean he looks like a punk, yeah, but he’s not. I mean he wouldn’t…”

Dawn smirked as she thought of how annoyed Spike would be to hear her say he wasn’t dangerous or rough as Ben had described him. She knew if Ben had met Buffy at the Bronze, they would have likely talked, and Spike probably pulled his alpha male card on the intern.

“Spike’s cool. He doesn’t treat me like a kid, just talks to me, even listens and takes my advice sometimes. Not many people do that.”

“Oh.”

Ben took another gulp of his coffee, a bit embarrassed. Dawn’s anger returned when she thought about how everyone would treat her now. She wasn’t even a kid.

“How can it hurt so much? These feelings? I don’t even exist.”

“Dawn, you exist. Whatever you think about your family, you…”

“No, you don’t get it! I don’t exist. That’s what they say. They can’t see me. I’m not real. I’m just some disguise to hide from Glory. I…”

Ben jumped back from the table and shot to his feet, spilling the remains of his coffee. Dawn jumped, startled by his reaction.

“No, you, you’re the Key.”

“How do you…?”

“Get out of here! Leave, you can’t be here! You shouldn’t have told me!”

Dawn backed away from him frightened. She didn’t understand how he knew about the Key. The way he was acting was freaking her out.

“I don’t understand. You know about the Key?”

“Dawn, please, it isn’t safe. You have to go!”

“Dawn!”

Dawn turned to see Buffy run into the room, followed by Spike, the rest of the Scoobies stumbling into the tiny room panting and struggling to catch their breath. Dawn flew to them, forgetting her vow not to go back to them as fear from Ben’s reaction took hold. Buffy wrapped an arm around her sister protectively and watched as Ben gripped his head and shouted at them to leave. The others looked on in fascination and confusion as he broke out in a sweat.

“Get out of here! She’s…she’s coming!”

Ben morphed into Glory who took in the shocked faces in front of her curiously. Just what had Ben been up to with the Slayer and her entourage?

“Glory!”

“How did? When did? Huh?” Xander queried, and the others had to agree, not knowing where the Hell-God had come from.

“Get back, everyone!”

Buffy pushed Dawn behind her and Giles moved in front of the frightened teen. Glory observed them in some amusement.

“Well well. If this isn’t a surprise. Now what could you all be doing here together? Are you going to hand over my Key?”

“Not a chance. You think for one minute I’m gonna let you end the world just because you’re homesick? You really are insane.”

“Now, now. That isn’t very nice. Oh that reminds me, I still owe you for killing my spy. I guess I’ll just have to make you talk myself using more creative means or maybe try out one of your vulnerable looking friends.”

Glory eyed the group gathered behind the Slayer and Buffy attacked. She flew at Glory, punching her with all her strength. The Hell-Bitch barely moved but frowned and raised a hand to her jaw. Buffy aimed another punch at her, but Glory grabbed her arm and backhanded her, sending her into a wall hard. Buffy kept her footing and dodged a punch from Glory, kicking her in the stomach and making her stumble backwards a few steps.

“Spike, help her!” Xander shouted at the vamp that’d been standing in a daze after Glory appeared.

What the bloody hell?

The whelp’s voice jarred Spike back to the present and he watched Buffy take another hit from Glory that had her sprawling into a filing cabinet. He used Glory’s momentary distraction to grab her from behind and squeeze hard enough to crush human bone. Glory, however just struggled to break free. Buffy was back on her feet and sending punch after punch Glory’s way while Spike held on.

“Enough!”

Glory threw herself backward hard enough to knock Spike off balance and kicked Buffy. She then broke free of Spike’s grip and swung around to punch him, before grabbing him by his coat and throwing him across the room where his head hit the wall with a loud crack and he slumped to the ground. Buffy tried to kick Glory while her back was turned, but she was too quick and the next thing Buffy knew, her foot was in Glory’s grasp. A second later she was sent flying into a wall of her own, knocking the various charts that had been hung on it to the ground as she fell.

“You just aren’t strong enough sweet cheeks. Even with your boyfriend you’re no match for me.”

She flipped her hair back over her shoulder and stalked towards the fallen Slayer.

“Now, should I try get something out of you, or should I work on one of your weak little friends?”

Buffy looked up, blood dripping down her face as Glory approached. She glanced over to the left and Glory followed her gaze only to have sparkling powder thrown into her face by Willow.

“Who are you calling weak?” Willow asked, before chanting a quick spell and flicking her hand towards the outraged hell-god, who vanished into thin air.

Buffy hauled herself up off the floor just as Willow started to collapse, feeling the effects of a particularly strong spell. Tara caught her and helped her balance. Buffy looked Dawn over and was relieved to find her unhurt.

“What were you thinking? I know you were mad and upset, but it’s dangerous out there. I wish you would have talked to us.”

“I couldn’t be around you. You should have let those Knights kill me. Glory’s too strong for you, and I know whatever she wants with me won’t be good.”

“Don’t talk like that. Dawn, you are my sister. You’re a part of me. All those memories are real to us. They’re the lives we’ve led. I don’t want to live in a world without my little sister in it. Glory won’t get you. We can stop her. We’re working on it, but you need to trust me. Please, Dawn, come home. Mom is worried sick, and I promise I’ll protect you.”

“Yeah, Dawnie, we all will,” Xander added.

“I guess, I just...I didn’t know how to talk to you about this. I’m sorry. I want to go home.”

“Good. I think we could all use a rest.”

Dawn looked at the floor, then back at Buffy, then over to the far corner.

“Um, Buffy?”

“What?”

Dawn gestured to the prone bleached blond on the floor and Buffy remembered with a gasp that Glory had knocked him out.

“Oh! Spike!”

She rushed over and shook him gently, calling his name. He groaned and slowly attempted to move. Buffy helped him up and balanced him when he wavered, clutching his head and moaning.

“Oh, babe, I’m sorry, are you okay?”

“Besides the cartoon birdies flyin’ ‘round my head, an’ the massive headache rivallin’ my best hangovers? Yeah, I’m, what’s it you say? Peachy, I’m just peachy.” He paused and glanced at her sideways, frowning, “Did you just call me babe?”

She smiled at him and used the hand she wasn’t supporting him with to stroke his injured head delicately.

“So what if I did? You got a problem with it?”

His expression softened, and he leaned into her touch, enjoying her soothing caresses.

“Not at all, pet. I could get used to it actually.”

“Uh…Willow? May I ask, uh, where was it you sent Glory?” The Watcher spoke up.

Willow looked at Giles and thought about it before shrugging her shoulders.

“Um, I’m not sure. It doesn’t pinpoint anywhere specific. I just wanted to get her gone. It was in our dimension unfortunately. A spell to really get rid of her like I did Olaf would take a lot longer with a lot more power behind it, and she’s a bit trickier than a troll, so it probably wouldn’t have worked. I just settled for the ‘poof, she’s gone!’ kind of spell.”

“Guys, where did Ben go? He was here before Glory then, I can’t remember. Did he get away?” Dawn asked, looking to each of them for an answer.

They all regarded Dawn for a moment and tried to remember what had happened. Ben had been there, but then Glory arrived, and Ben wasn’t here anymore.

“No-one saw him leave? I know he was here. Maybe he got away?” Buffy said.

Spike looked at Buffy curiously, then glanced around at all the Scooby’s and their blank faces.

“Oh come on! No one remembers?”

They all looked at him bewildered.

“Remembers what?”

Spike frowned at them.

“Ben is Glory.”

Chapter 26


“Ben is Glory.” Spike stared around at the blank faces looking back at him and sighed.

They were sitting in Buffy’s living room, having finally made it home, and he still couldn’t get them to believe that Glory and Ben were one and the same.

“Are you sure you’re feeling okay? You did hit your head pretty hard.”

Spike scowled at Xander and growled in frustration.

“Look, clearly this is some spell the bint has goin’ on so anyone who sees her little presto-change-o instantly forgets about it. Me bein’ other than human must make me immune. Point is Glory is Ben all right?”

Buffy pursed her lips and tried to let what he’d said sink in. Giles took off his glasses to give them a good polish, then putting on his best research face, regarded Spike thoughtfully.

“So what you’re saying is…Ben and Glory have a connection?”

Spike rolled his eyes and spoke very slowly.

“’S not that bleedin’ hard to understand. Ben-Glory-Glory-Ben.”

“So…Ben…is Glory?” Anya asked tentatively.

Spike raised his hands in thanks and gestured to Anya excitedly.

“Yes! And we have a winner!”

“Wonderful.” Giles beamed before turning to Spike. “Now, do we suspect that Glory and Ben are connected?”

All eyes turned to Spike as the Scoobies murmured in agreement. He gave up.

“Sod it. Never mind, jus’ get that box open, and let’s see what Doc got his head cut off for.”

He plopped down on the arm of the chair Buffy was sitting in, and she rubbed his back soothingly. She didn’t know what he was so frustrated about. Something to do with Ben and Glory, but she was anxious to know what he’d found.

They all leaned in when Giles opened the box. Inside were manuscripts, various papers, some charts, and a small book. Giles opened the book carefully and studied a few of the pages.

“Well, it will take some translating, but I believe this will be very helpful indeed. It does appear to describe a ritual of some sort---Yes, I think we might have something here.”

Buffy grinned at the news that they might finally have something useful. She took hold of Spike’s hand, giving it a squeeze, and he turned to face her, smiling shyly at the look she was giving him.

“Oh, h-hey, Dawn, is everything okay?” Tara spoke up.

Buffy looked over towards the hall where Dawn had just come downstairs. When they’d arrived home, Joyce had whisked her daughter into a firm hug before telling her how sorry she was, then proceeded to inform her of the almost heart-attack she’d given her by running off like that. When everything had calmed down, Dawn begged exhaustion, and Joyce and she had said goodnight. Joyce wanted to know about any info they got on Glory, but the evening had taken its toll on her and reassured that they probably wouldn’t know anything definite or be able to sort out a plan until morning, she’d headed off to bed.

“Yeah, it’s fine. Just wanted a drink,” Dawn answered, subdued.

“Oh, okay, sure. Night, Dawnie,” Buffy said, smiling.
Dawn took in the overly cheery smiles of the Scoobies, with the exception of Giles and Buffy, who acted normal. Spike just observed her silently and sighed. She headed off to the kitchen without another word. Spike waited a second, then excused himself before following Dawn into the kitchen. Curiously they watched him go, with the exception of Giles, who was too busy burying his nose in the book to notice anything.

“What’s that about?” Xander asked.

Buffy shook her head and glanced in the direction of the kitchen again before answering.

“I think he wants to talk to her about…stuff. This whole Key thing. Maybe, make her feel better.”

“Isn’t that your job?”

“Yeah, but I don’t think she’s ready to talk to me yet, and even if she doesn’t want to talk, Spike’s pretty perceptive. She might listen to what he has to say.”

“Why’s that?”

Buffy turned her attention back to the little group and joined Willow and Tara in picking up one of the manuscripts for inspection.

“She has a crush on him.”

Xander’s eyes bugged, and he nearly fell off the couch; he whipped his head up so fast. Buffy struggled to keep her eyes on the cryptic page in front of her and suppressed a giggle. Anya rolled her eyes and turned to look at the same page Tara was looking over.

“What? But no, I’m—me--she has a crush on me. I’m the adorable teenage crush. Funny-guy-Xander. When did I get replaced by Evil Dead Two?”

“Name-calling again, and apparently, she always found him kinda hot, which, hey, totally understandable. As for you being bumped down the crush chain? I think it happened after that huge fight when you acted like a jerk. Dawn has a long memory. She’s kinda like an elephant that way.”

Okay, so maybe that was a little harsh, but Buffy never really had gotten on Xander’s case about the stuff he’d said yet, and it was worth it for the look on his face. So the best way to give him a reality check appeared to be by removing his image as a crush-worthy idol for a young teen. Go figure.

“Is there like, some Spike loving gene inherent in all Summers women here? Because I’m sensing a trend. And don’t even try to deny the way your mom fusses over him, promising to keep marshmallows in stock for him and anything else he likes. Oh yeah, I noticed. Does he have some sort of Summers thrall?”

I’ve wondered that myself, Buffy smiled and kept her head down.

***

“You doin’ okay Nibblet?”

Dawn looked up at Spike, leaning against the doorframe as she picked up her glass of water. He had his head tilted to one side and one eyebrow quirked.

“I’m fine, really. A little overwhelmed maybe. It’s not every day you find out you’re some mystical, glowy, Key thingy---but I’ll deal.”

Spike jutted his jaw out and glanced at the floor, sliding his hands into his duster.

“Uh huh. You know, they don’t think of you differently. You’re still Dawn to them. Jus’ gonna take them a while to get over the news is all, like you said.”

Dawn stared into her glass of water. How did he always know what people were thinking?

“I just wish we could skip the getting used to it part. It’s not easy being looked at like I’m going to fall to pieces if they don’t pretend things are okay. It’s worse than when they treated me like a kid. They’re all so busy trying to make everything seem normal. They don’t realize they’re acting differently towards me.”

“Well they always were a little slow to catch on.”

Dawn grinned a little at that, and Spike smiled.

“Least you still have your mum and Buffy. They didn’t act different around you when they found out, did they?”

Dawn shook her head.

“And me. I couldn’t care less what you’re s’posed to be. You’re Nibblet, and it doesn’t change the good advice you’ve given me or the way you accept me. Oh, and I s’pose the Watcher, he acts pretty normal around you, even if he’s a git.”

Dawn closed the gap between them and hugged him. Spike was surprised by the move, but relaxed after a moment and hugged her back. She reluctantly pulled back and gave him a smile.

“Thanks, Spike.”

“Welcome, Bit.”

They walked into the hall together and said goodnight as Spike went to join Buffy, and Dawn turned to go upstairs. The sisters’ eyes met briefly, and Dawn exchanged a smile with Buffy, who smiled back before heading upstairs. She was halfway up when Xander’s voice stopped her.

“Hey Dawnie, you know anytime you want to talk or whatever, the Xan-man’s here for you.”

Dawn frowned in confusion, and Buffy rolled her eyes. Spike threw him an odd look before sitting down and deciding to just ignore him.

“Um, thanks…I guess.”

Xander sighed defeated as Dawn hurried up the last few steps.

“I guess we’re in for a long night of research then.” He scanned the pile of charts and papers on the coffee table in front of him, rubbed his hands together, and stood up. “Okay, so time I fixed that door.”

Spike watched amused as Xander walked by him, preparing to get his tools together for some manual labor. He turned to Buffy who was still flicking through manuscripts. She spoke quietly without looking at him.

“Thank you. Something tells me she needed that talk.”

He shrugged, thankful he couldn’t blush.

“Jus’ wanted to make sure she knew I don’ think any different of her. So luv, what do we do now?”

Buffy picked up a faded piece of paper and handed it to him. He glanced at it and raised a scarred eyebrow at her. Suppressing a grin, she looked him straight in the eye.

“Research. Welcome to the Scoobies.”

***

Now this, this was power. He had it so wrong before. You needed blood, but you didn’t need a person to provide it, you took it. You took everything you wanted.

So much strength. So warm…

The last of the girl’s whimpers were cut off as he drove his fangs further into her neck, pulling on the blood, drinking her life. When he’d drained her dry he pulled back savagely, tearing the flesh of her throat and letting her fall to the ground like a rag doll. He licked his lips and snarled triumphantly. With this power he felt unstoppable. For so long he’d fought creatures like the one he’d become, hoping to exterminate them, thinking them filth. Now it seemed so clear. Vampires weren’t filth. They were higher up the food chain, and humans were just fodder who thought themselves special because they could walk in the daylight. Soon though, all those he knew would be dead while he lived on, would live on, for centuries to come. The thought gave him pause.

Is there really anything here worth living on for? Feeding, hunting, surviving. For what? What use is it if we have to live in the shadows and watch as humans change the earth? Gradually destroying it with their arrogance. They are the filth, the vermin. They need to be put back in their place.

A sudden crash grabbed his attention, and he turned yellow eyes to the end of the alley where pieces of broken crates and tipped up garbage cans lay scattered. He saw a figure emerge, coughing and patting herself down with their hands. A woman, he realized. Blonde, wearing some odd looking clothes. He looked closer. They looked like men‘s clothes, too big for her small frame. He glanced up, wondering where she could have fallen from, but all that he could see was the dark night sky. He stayed in the shadows, observing the woman. He could bite her, but he had just fed, and her arrival in the alley was strange. He could also sense power. Faint, as he had yet to hone his senses, but he could still distinguish it, warning him to be wary.

“I hate that witch! Ugh, it’s gonna be a bitch getting these splinters out, not to mention that sand she threw at me. Damn stuff’s worse than glitter---At least it wasn’t any of my clothes that got ruined. Oh Ben sweety! You’ve really gone and done it this time. Just what were you doing with the Slayer and her friends?”

He watched as she looked skyward, flailing her arms around as she talked. She had to be crazy. Then again, this was a crazy town.

“Ben, get your butt out here and talk to me! I can feel you, you maggot!”

The vamp was about to move forward when her appearance shifted, and suddenly he was staring at a man. At a human man. His eyes widened and he began listening very intently. This was something you didn’t see every day. Even on the Hellmouth. He realized he knew the human. He was an intern at the hospital, which would explain the men’s clothing, but not why he was changing into this woman.

“I wasn’t plotting against you if that’s what you think. You think I want them to know I’m your vessel? I’d rather live thanks. It’s bad enough the enemies you’ve made over the years finding out and hunting me down. I just want to be left alone in peace!”

He shifted back to the blonde woman, who turned and began pacing as she spoke.

“Hate to break it to you honey, but you aren’t normal. And a peaceful life? So not in your cards. If you’d just help me, you could be so much more. I’d be very grateful. I have some hell-gods to punish when I get back. I’m sure there would be lots of benefits I could give you as a ruler once my dominion was established.”

She morphed into Ben again who continued pacing, never even braking stride.

“Wonderful. Really. I just can’t wait to be your little lapdog, bowing down to kiss the feet of the once great Glorificus! Come on Glory! You really think I’d let you destroy this world? I built a life here, helping people. The last thing I want is to be your slave!”

Glory! This woman…whatever, is Glory?

He watched as the woman reappeared. She did match the description he’d gotten about her, though he’d never seen her in person before. He was even more interested in the conversation now.

“Ben. Sweet, naïve, idiotic Ben. Do you really think you can stop me and live on? Who are you really helping here? If I don’t get to go home, which, I will, by the way, but if I don’t, I’m going to have to feed off a lot more human minds to stay grounded or we both lose it, understand? All those people you’re trying to help will fall under my need to stay sane in this…ridiculous excuse for existence! Face it. You want to survive. You don’t care what happens to anyone else. If you did, you’d have spilled our little secret to the Slayer. Not that I’d let you of course. Now think about it. Would you rather go on suffering here? Being hunted down? Or, would you prefer to rule at my side, or well, not exactly my side, but as close to it as anyone could ever really get, being what you are?”

Glory became Ben again, who paused. He considered her words. After a minute, he looked up.

“You’re right. Fine. If you keep up your end of the bargain. Even though…I don’t know if I can…” Ben stared at the ground and mumbled the last of the sentence, “hurt an innocent.”

He instantly became Glory who clapped in glee.

“An innocent? The Key’s human? See, you’re already helping. One little human won’t matter when you’re on top, now will it? So who is it? It’s one of the Slayer’s friends right? Which one? Ooh that witch, the one who doesn’t keep interfering in my plans, she’s new. Is it her?”

Ben was back, and he sighed, running his hand over his face. He steeled himself to give Glory what she wanted. To finally give in to her demands after spending so long fighting her. He had to. To survive, he had to.

“It’s not her. It’s…it’s Dawn.”

Glory frowned, thinking.

“Dawn. Dawn.”

She clicked her fingers, and her eyes lit up with recognition.

“The sister. The Slayer’s sister? She’s the Key? Oh wow. Oh wow, this is good! And it makes perfect sense. An innocent, someone the Slayer will protect with her life. Oh yes. This, I can work with. Ben, you won’t regret it. Now. First things first. I need to get back home and make sure the preparations are going as planned, inform Jinx, ugh, get changed into something more flattering, and get my Key. At last, I can get out of this miserable dimension! Oh, but there is one more thing to take care of.”

She suddenly spun and the next thing he knew, the vampire was dragged from his hiding spot, and pinned against the wall, dangling off the ground, Glory’s hand in a death grip on his throat. He had no doubt she would only have to squeeze for his head to come off and turn him to dust.

“I really don’t like eavesdroppers. Nasty little vampire. Don’t tell me you’re another one of the Slayer’s little pets? That is unusual.”

That got him pissed off, even at her mercy.

“I am not her pet! I am nothing like that…that thing! He isn’t a vampire! And he’s not a man! He’s nothing, and she’s a fool. A cold bitch who gets off on dead guys.”

“I’m sensing a history here. Something tells me you aren’t going to be helping the Slayer with anything you heard here today if I don’t kill you.”

“Are you kidding? That bitch gets everything she deserves. This world deserves to rot if she’s its excuse for a protector, a champion. I’d kill her myself if she didn’t always have so many people around backing her up. I know who you are Glory. I know what you want to do, and I want to help. Keep me alive, and I’ll get you your Key.”

She let him go, and he dropped to the ground, clutching his throat before straightening, his features shifting into his human mask.

“What makes you think you can get my Key?”

“Because you were right. We do have history. No matter how bad it is, I can get close. They don’t know I’m a vampire now. All I have to do is get near Dawn. Play the hopeless ex of Buffy’s who can’t let go, and then grab her.”

“So. You were the Slayer’s toy huh? And you got turned. I’m guessing it’s after she cut you loose for the pretty blond.”

He snarled, and she smirked, looking him up and down, noticing the camouflage outfit.

“Easy soldier boy. I don’t want to have to hurt you. I was going to get Ben to grab the girl, but something tells me you’ll be less squeamish about it. Then again, if the Slayer gets to you first, she’ll probably kill you.”

“I heard you before. Willow did something to transport you here didn’t she? And they were talking to Ben. How do you know they don’t already know your secret?”

“Because thanks to a little magical protection they instantly forget if they see me change.”

She paused as something crossed her mind. He waited. She let out an exasperated breath.

“But apparently that doesn’t work on vampires now, does it? He probably saw. Even if they don’t remember, he knows. Damn it. Guess I’ll have to rely on you. I could always go get her myself, but the witch could do one of those annoying transportation spells, and I have so much left to plan in time for the ritual.”

She winced suddenly and cried out. He watched, nervously as she pulled at her hair. Gradually she eased her grip and breathed heavily, regaining her composure.

“Need a brain. Need lots of brains. Can’t let the juice run low now, not now. Too close. So close. Can’t slip. What’s your name? Need your name to make calling you easier.”

He stood tall and stepped closer, more sure of himself now. He could help her. Surely she would reward him as well?

“Name’s Riley. And I know where you can get brains. Lots of them. Some smarter than others, but there’ll be plenty to go around.”

He grinned evilly, an ugly twist of his lips. Glory stared at him, eyes cold with her need to re-energize, to escape the madness threatening to overcome her.

“Show me.”

“I will. I’ll help you. I want one guarantee first.”

Her eyes narrowed dangerously, but he didn’t flinch.

“What?”

“The vampire dies.”

Slowly, she smiled. She walked up to him, circled his neck with her hands and caressed him gently, her nails scraping his skin.

“Riley, honey. If there’s one thing I can guarantee? It’s that when I get my Key, they all will.”

***

“How do you people do this every day?” Spike groaned as he pinched his nose, worn out from trying to make sense of the pages in front of him.

“Well it’s not every day. Didn’t you have to do research when you were evil and hunting for relics and other evil schemes?” Buffy replied.

“That’s why I had Dalton. Used to give him whatever needed translating or sussing out, and he’d have it in no time or risk a very painful incentive to work harder. ‘Nother difference between me an’ Angelus. My minions had a purpose, an’ smarts. Unlike his bunch o’ ingrates.”

Xander scoffed as he worked away on securing the final hinge to the front door.

“Guess that explains you then.”

“Oi! I am no bloody minion. Never was. ‘Sides, Dru sired me, not that ponce.”

“So it makes it better that the insane vampire sired you and not the psychotic, homicidal serial killer? Plus, I seem to remember you calling him your sire before, when he was offering you my neck and your Yoda, which was also strange.”

“Not that it’s any o’ your business, but what I meant was he taught me everythin’ he knew ‘bout bein’ a vampire. He was like my…teacher…or whatever, until I outgrew him.”

“Outgrew him?”

Spike growled and Buffy decided enough was enough.

“Guys, cut it out. You’re falling back into bad habits. Besides which, none of this is helping or has anything at all to do with finding a way to stop Glory. Having said that, our own personal Dalton hasn’t said much in a while. Giles? You with us still?”

The Watcher was staring at a page in the book, but it didn’t seem as though he were reading the words. Rather, it looked like he was lost in thought. Buffy called him a little louder, and Tara shook the man gently to get his attention.

“Hmm? I’m sorry what? Something about…” he frowned. “…Yoda?”

Buffy stared at her Watcher. He didn’t seem to be with them fully at all. Maybe this all night research stuff was finally taking its toll on him.

“Giles did you find something?”

The older man blinked, taking in the equally puzzled and eager faces of those around him. Xander finished his work on the door and joined them, also looking hopeful.

“Well. Yes. In a way, but it isn’t…I…” He took off his glasses and pinched his nose, then rubbed his bleary eyes and sighed.

“According to this book, Glory is on a time limit with this ritual. It has to be completed in two night’s time actually, which would explain why the pressure is on, and possibly why she was resorting to sending out spies. Also, it appears that while Glory cannot be killed due to her godly status, while she resides in this dimension she needs a human vessel. Unfortunately it doesn’t say who…”

He was cut off when Spike stood, his jaw clenching in an obvious effort to maintain patience. They all looked at him surprised, wondering if he was all right or about to start a blood-bath. He could still look scary, even with the chip.

“Oh for pete’s sake! We know who the soddin’ human vessel is. It’s Ben! For the hundredth bloody time, Ben is Glory!”

“Ben is Glory?” Buffy asked.

He let out a sound like a strangled sob of frustration, coupled with an insane giggle and clapped a hand over his face.

“Yes. Ben-Glory-Glory-Ben.”

“How do you know?” She asked, deciding to ignore his apparently crazy mental breakdown for now.

“Because we saw…wait what?” His head shot up from behind his hand.

“How do you know Ben is Glory?” She asked again.

Spike looked at her in amazement. He then noticed all the Scoobies glancing between him and the Slayer, obviously waiting for an answer, but unsettled by his behavior. They believed him?

“You actually believe me now? We saw Ben change into Glory at the hospital but some magic ability she has makes humans forget. I’ve been tryin’ to explain it to you all night an’ now you believe me?”

The Scoobies cast glances at each other as though it was news to them. Willow braved a response.

“I…don’t remember that. I don’t remember you saying anything about Ben being Glory.”

Spike just stared at her. Willow shrank back a little under his gaze.

“Sorry.”

Giles was chewing on the end of his glasses, and he raised them up a bit, tilting his head sideways before he spoke.

“Well, not that I remember either, but if you were trying to tell us this before, Spike, the answer might be that we now know for sure she has a human vessel, which would make your announcement that it’s Ben more plausible. That doesn’t mean we would recognize the change if we saw it ourselves though, even with this information. Then again, it could just be that her power is fading as the time for the ritual draws closer.”

Buffy considered that. Two night’s time. If she could just keep Dawn safe until then…

“Giles what does it say about the ritual? How do we stop it?” she asked, turning into serious Slayer mode.

“Um, well, that’s…” Giles lowered his head to the floor before meeting her gaze again.

“Buffy, the ritual involves Dawn’s blood. Glory will bleed Dawn, and for as long as her blood shall flow, the door to the other dimensions shall remain open. It won’t just open her home dimension. The power of the Key will cause every dimension to open and bleed together until her blood flows no more. Buffy, if the ritual starts, the only way to stop it is…”

“No.” Buffy stood up and shook her head. “No, we are not talking about killing my sister. It’s not happening. There’s another way, there has to be.”

“Buffy…”

“No, Giles. If that’s the only way to stop it then we just make sure it doesn’t start. Two nights. We keep Dawn safe, and we deal with Glory afterwards. I will not risk my sister. Anyone even considers hurting her they’ll have to go through me.”

Spike stood and wrapped his arm around the Slayer.

“And me. No one touches the Nibblet.”

“Okay guys. Calm down, no one’s going to hurt Dawn.” Willow began, not liking the building tension in the room. “Let’s just pack up and head home for the night. Everyone’s tired, and we can work this out tomorrow. The house is protected so you should be safe for now. We’ll decide what to do later.”

They all muttered their agreement. Buffy was lost in thought as they prepared to leave. She could not let Glory get near Dawn.

Chapter 27



“You know, you were right? Very few actual smarts around here, but plenty of minds just waiting to be drained.” Glory turned to Riley, who stood at her side, like he was her right hand man.

“What is the meaning of this? What are you doing here? Finn, what happened to you?” Riley’s former commander stepped forward.

They were currently standing outside one of the buildings of the military in Sunnydale. Glory had easily burst through their defenses, as Riley opened the door. The commandos were standing there, weapons raised, completely caught off guard by the appearance of an A.W.O.L. Riley and a blonde woman dressed in men’s clothes.

“Tell you what,” Glory said to Riley, ignoring the man in front of her. “Whoever I don’t drain, I’ll let you turn. You can have your own little troupe to command while you work for me.”

Riley grinned back at her.

“Sounds like a plan. Even the Slayer will have her hands full with an army of commando vamps.”

The men gripped their weapons tightly.

“Finn?” The commander questioned again.

Riley turned to the man. The contempt written clearly on his face as he stared him down.

“Sorry. Glory here needs some minds to feed off. I suggested you guys since you really aren’t needed here for anything else. Those of you lucky enough to escape such a fate get to serve under me again, and before you argue, no, you don’t have a choice.”

He shifted into his vampire features and bared his fangs, causing the men to step back a bit. The last thing they expected was to see him return, least of all as a vampire, even if they’d suspected the nature of his late night activities. One of the soldiers who had served under Riley, found his voice. He’d never cared for the man, and he’d been more than happy to see the back of him after the disastrous mission Riley sent them on for his own personal vendetta.

“What makes you think you can take on all of us? In case you’ve forgotten we hunt things like you down. It was a very stupid move to come here.”

Riley snarled and leveled the man with a golden-eyed stare.

“You seem to have forgotten your place. Just for that, I don’t think I’ll be turning you. Have fun losing your mind. As for taking you all on, I don’t need to do much of anything. You really should’ve learned by now. Things on the Hellmouth aren’t what they appear. You’re not up against some average demon here boys. You’re up against a god. And my money. Is on her.”

“Haven’t we had enough chit-chat already?” Glory sighed and stared at her fingernails. “Some of us have people to kill, dimensions to cross, minds to absorb. I have a schedule here people.”

Riley gave her a toothy grin, and stepped back a bit, extending his arm, offering the men to her.

“By all means. Take them. Let’s get this show on the road.”

She took two steps forward.

“Finally.”

The men opened fire on her. Riley had wisely stepped behind her. Bullets wouldn’t kill him, but they would hurt like a bitch. Glory continued forward, the bullets bouncing off her. Riley had a brief image of Superman repelling bullets the same way and chuckled. People wouldn’t need comics if they knew what really existed out there. Of course, the villains were the ones with the real power.

Seeing the guns were having little effect, they switched to the tasers. They did nothing but cause little blue sparks to flicker across her skin while she rolled her eyes.

“Honestly, this is all really annoying. You’re just lucky I’m not wearing my dress. Now, enough play. I think I’ll start with you.” She pointed her finger at the guy who had mothed off to Riley.

The vampire watched, as in mere seconds, she obliterated an army’s sanity. The few she left alone were huddled in a little group, defenseless, staring at the blank-eyed men, moaning and clawing at themselves in horror. She stretched and did a little twirl, a happy smile on her face.

“Mmm, they’re all yours. Not much goin’ on up there, but man, there was enough to get me buzzed! That should hold me until the ceremony is over, then I won’t need them anymore. I’ll be as sane as I ever was back home. Chop-chop, I don’t have all day.”

Riley stalked towards the men. They had lost their weapons as Glory pushed them back and were now cornered by the vampire. He grabbed the nearest one, and hoisted him off his feet so he could look directly into his eyes.

“Count yourself lucky, and welcome to the group.”

He sank his fangs into the guy’s neck, draining him quickly. When the heartbeat was just about to fade, he bit into his own wrist and shoved it against the man’s mouth. Too weak to resist, the soldier was dimly aware of the blood entering his mouth before his life faded away. Riley dropped him, licked his lips, and turned to the next man.Glory watched as the vamp drained them. A little army of vamps wouldn’t do her much good, but they might distract the Slayer long enough for the ritual to be completed or at least, for Riley to snag her Key. To think, she’d been so close to the girl so many times, and never even knew. She could have taken her easily. Now, the Slayer would be pulling out all the stops to protect her. She’d fail of course, but that didn’t mean she wouldn’t be a thorn in the hell-god’s side until then.

***

Buffy woke up in Spike’s arms. She paused for a second, thinking how strange that was. She’d woken up with him before, sadly only twice so far, but it had been to him gently waking her up or him wrapping an arm around her while she slept. Normally, Buffy tended to lean away from the person she slept with. It was just something she did subconsciously, needing her space. She wasn’t much of a cuddler and surprised to find that she’d turned towards Spike in the night, settling her head on his chest with one arm and one leg wrapped around him.

And I asked him if he could be anymore caveman possessive guy. Now, look at me.

They’d sat together on the couch for a while after everyone left until Buffy announced she really needed sleep and couldn’t think about this any longer. Spike had offered to stay up and keep watch downstairs while she slept. Buffy knew Willow and Tara’s spell would alert them to danger. Xander had fixed the door, so it was secure, and she thought it unlikely that Glory would strike so soon, if she even knew about Dawn. Willow’s transportation spell had to have taken something out of the hell-god. She had asked Spike to join her upstairs instead, since she knew she’d rest easier with him close by. He’d been surprised, but agreed.Nothing had happened. They were both worn out, and their minds were too full of Glory and Dawn. So after removing his duster they had lain down together, fully dressed, and just held each other until they fell asleep. It seemed that even in deep slumber they didn’t want to let go of each other. After admiring his peaceful, contented look for a minute as he slept, she slowly eased up and extricated herself from the vampire. She smiled a little as he frowned and shifted onto his side, closer to the spot she had vacated, but he didn’t wake, and after leaning down to quickly kiss his cheek, she went in search of her Mom and sister.

She found them downstairs watching T.V. Dawn was huddled up on the sofa next to Joyce, who was stroking the young girl’s hair softly, while they stared at whatever show they were watching.

“Hey,” Buffy said as she entered and sat down in one of the chairs.

“Morning Buffy or well, afternoon anyway. My, almost evening. You must have been up a long time last night. When did everyone leave?” Joyce asked, never ceasing stroking Dawn’s hair.

Dawn looked over at Buffy, and gave her a half-hearted smile.

“I don’t really know. Somewhere close to sun-up. Spike and I stayed up a little longer, just to make sure everything was safe here though.”

“Did he spend the night?”

Buffy quickly looked up at her mother. She hadn’t thought about what she was saying. Joyce knew well enough Buffy was no innocent, but she still never approved of boyfriend’s spending the night if she and Dawn were in the house.

“Well yeah, but just so we knew everyone was safe, and I felt better with him around—”

Joyce held up a hand to halt what was sure to turn into another Buffy babble with an amused smile.

“It’s okay honey, you don’t have to explain. I’m happy he stayed here. Two super-beings in the house would definitely help a person to sleep better. Besides, I can tell from your apparel nothing happened. Relax.”

Buffy glanced down at her wrinkled clothes. It was obvious she’d slept in them. She was relieved and a little surprised by Joyce’s reaction. She supposed she could expect anything when it came to her Mom’s reactions about Spike.

“Okay then. Um, I’m gonna go grab something to eat and take a shower, then call the gang over here, and we can work out a plan.” She got up, preparing to head to the kitchen.

“Did you find anything?” Dawn asked, sitting up a little straighter.

Buffy faced her sister and saw the nervous apprehension on her face. Dawn wanted to know what she was meant for, whether or not they could stop Glory, and she was afraid of what would happen if they failed. She wanted answers, and Buffy had learned that while it might hurt, these things were better out in the open. She couldn’t protect her sister from all the badness in the world if she tried to hide it from her.

“There’s a ritual, two nights from now that Glory has to do to return to her hell dimension. If she misses it, she won’t be able to get home. If we stop her getting to you until the ritual’s passed you’ll be safe. We’re working on a way to do that.”

“What does the ritual—? I mean, what do I do? What am I for?”

Joyce cast a quick glance at Buffy. She might be willing to give Dawn answers, but there were some things the Slayer really didn’t want her to know.

“It’s your blood. She needs blood to open a portal to all the other dimensions. She won’t be getting it. I promise you, Dawn. You won’t be used like that. I won’t let her hurt you.” Dawn nodded, her mood somber. Joyce hugged her more tightly, and they turned back to the TV, their minds on other things. Buffy headed into the kitchen, though she wasn’t feeling as hungry anymore.I swear I’ll keep that promise Dawn. No one is going to hurt you. Not even to try and save the world.

***

Spike woke up in Buffy’s bed. He took in his surroundings, and a slow smile crept across his face. Buffy’s room. He’d held Buffy all night or all morning at least, in her room, and it made him happier than he ever could have thought. He frowned when he realized he was alone. He got up and ran a hand through his hair. A few of his curls had come loose from the gel, and he grumbled in annoyance. He’d have to try slick them back a bit before the Scoobies got here. No way was he going to let them see him like that. Buffy may like it, but she was the only one who was going to see it. He patted it down as best he could, grabbed his duster, and headed downstairs.

He could hear the shower going in the bathroom and his senses let him know just who was in there. The thought of Buffy’s naked body, all wet and soapy on the other side of the door, flitted through his brain, and he groaned. While he would be more than happy to give in to his desire to join her, and offer to scrub her back for her, there was no way he was attempting it now with Joyce and the Bit downstairs and a hell-god gunning for them. Adjusting himself slightly, he wrapped his coat around him and continued downstairs, forcing thoughts of wet, naked Slayer out of his head.

“Morning, Spike. Well, you know…Sleep okay?” Joyce asked the minute he stepped off the stairs.

He moved over to the doorway of the living room and smiled sheepishly.

“Uh, yeah. You?”

“Fine. Took a while, but fine. So, you’re getting a plan together today for holding Glory back?”

“That’s the idea. Soon as the others get here anyway.”
“Well, that’s, um, good.”

Neither of them knew what to say anymore. It wasn’t easy to make small talk when you were in the middle of a crisis. Spike thought it was even more difficult to have a conversation with your girl’s mother, while trying to hide the effect images of said girl in the shower were having on you.

“Spike, when was the last time you ate?” Joyce tilted her head as she examined him.

“Uh….” Spike blinked, the question catching him off guard. “Well, last night I guess…”

“No.” Joyce lowered her eyes before looking back at him, concerned and a little awkward. “I mean properly ate. As in—blood.”

“Oh.” Spike was even more taken aback. “Well, two nights ago, I think.”

Joyce nodded. He was looking tired. Of course, they were all exhausted after all the panic last night, but it wouldn’t do for him not to eat. He needed his strength.
“Right. I’ll call Willow and ask her to pick you up some blood on her way over here.”

Spike’s eyes went wide. Joyce was even more accepting of him than he’d thought if she didn’t mind him drinking blood in her house. He barely had time to utter a “Thanks.” as she went to get the phone and make the call. Dawn smiled at the obviously pleased vampire.

“Shouldn’t you have gotten over the fact that we all like you by now?” she asked.

“Don’t think it’ll ever stop surprisin’ me, pet. Been a long time since anyone was nice to me. Can’t expect a bloke not to get all chipper with a group of women fussin’ over him.” Spike grinned.

“I thought I was the only one you needed fussing over you,” Buffy said, as she came downstairs.

Spike turned to look at her and noticed how much more refreshed she seemed compared to last night. The worry was still there, but she had made an effort to look just as peppy as always, like she was ready to take on the world. He smiled and held an arm out to her, feeling the warmth flood through him when she approached and snuggled into his side, allowing him to drape his arm over her shoulder.

“You are, but havin’ the whole family do it is a bonus.” He kissed the top of her head.

“So what’s the fussing about this time?” Buffy asked, giving him a quick squeeze before leading him over to the couch, so they could sit down next to Dawn.

“Your mum’s callin’ Red to get me some blood.”
“Oh, that’s right, you haven’t eaten.” Buffy frowned.

Like mother like daughter, Spike thought, recognizing the concern in her eyes, although she didn’t feel awkward at the topic, and that made him even happier.

“I’ll be fine, luv. Red’ll get here soon an’ I can tuck in. Not gonna collapse just yet.”

Joyce came back in the room and informed them that Willow and Tara would be there shortly with Spike’s blood, and the others were on their way. Giles arrived right after she’d told them and rushed in to spread his notes and translated texts from the box Spike had obtained, on the dining room table, setting it up as command central. Xander and Anya were next, closely followed by the two witches. Buffy took the blood from Willow, disappearing into the kitchen. She came back with a mug in hand that she placed in front of Spike. He picked it up and realized, with pleasant surprise, it was warm.

“You heated it for me?”

“98.6, or as close to that as I could work out on the microwave. The rest is in the fridge. Not near our food, because still, ew…” She smiled at his mock-annoyed head tilt. “But in a drawer of its own. I should convince Mom to give you some freezer space, and we can stock up. Don’t want you to go short again.”

“Thanks, pet.” He pulled her down beside him, and wrapped his arm around her while he drank his blood.

Xander shook his head, a little grossed out by the comfortable way Buffy was handing Spike blood as though it was coffee, but for once kept his mouth shut and turned back to their research. Anya gave him a pat on the back, pleased that his behavior was at last improving.

Hours later, they still hadn’t come up with a satisfactory plan. None of the information they had shed any light on how to kill Glory or fight her, and the only thing that resembled a plan was the idea that they should flee, and go into hiding somewhere until the ritual was over. That was no good either. Glory wasn’t going to let anything get in her way and with the ritual approaching, if they high-tailed it out of town, she’d be on them in an instant. They needed to fight her somehow.

“It keeps saying the same thing. A bazooka won’t even help stop her.” Xander laid his head on the table, fed up with the circles they’d been making all evening.

The others were just as disheartened, but didn’t want to face giving up just yet. Night was approaching, and Buffy was getting edgy, expecting another attack. To be honest, she hadn’t wanted to hope they’d have this much time before Glory came after them. The quiet was getting on her nerves. She was sure the hell-bitch was up to something.

“Maybe we’re looking at this the wrong way. Maybe something a little more basic—or not so much basic as old,” Anya piped up.

“Care to explain?” Giles asked taking his glasses off and rubbing his strained eyes.

“Well, instead of bazookas or other fancy weapons, maybe we should look at something that existed when people believed in these gods. I mean, she’s not from our dimension, but that doesn’t mean stuff that hurt the ancients in our world wouldn’t hurt her too.” Anya was practically bouncing in her seat thinking she had a good idea.

“What sort of old stuff?” Buffy asked, interestedly. It was the only lead they had at this point.

“Well, we have that Dagon Sphere that’s supposed to repel her, right? That was put here to be useful, maybe it can hold her off. Ooh, ooh, and the hammer! Olaf’s hammer! He was a sort of god. That should hurt. It hurt you after all.”

It most certainly did, Buffy thought, then again, she wasn’t a god, but it was plausible. Anya was making sense. It seemed to be becoming one of the ex-vengeance demon’s new habits.

“All right, so we may have found a way to hurt Glory, but none of this is guaranteed to kill her. Do you think you could hold her off long enough to stall the ritual?” Giles tried to reason.

“I don’t know, but I can try. Maybe if I hurt her enough she’ll turn back into Ben. A human shouldn’t be hard to deal with,” Buffy mused.

“What about Ben? I mean if Glory still hasn’t attacked maybe she’s still too weak. Why don’t we avoid her and go the safe route. Fight Ben? I mean, we could take out one human to save the world, right?” Xander asked, and paused soon after saying it.

An uncomfortable silence settled over the group, and they all cast glances around the room. Giles chewed on his glasses in thought, observing Buffy. She hugged herself tightly, thinking it over. She wanted to. It was smarter, but…she couldn’t do it. They didn’t hurt humans. She didn’t hurt humans. Xander lowered his head, knowing it was a bad suggestion. They couldn’t kill an innocent. Not even for this.

“You can’t and you won’t,” Spike said firmly, seeing the conflict waging within Buffy. “But I can.”

They all looked at him sharply. Giles lowered his glasses. The others got a little twitchy at the thought of him killing before they remembered the chip.

“The chip—” Buffy began but Spike cut her off, shaking his head.

“I could put up with the pain if I did it quick enough. Hell, if you beat Glory down enough to knock him out it would be easier. I’m not sayin’ it wouldn’ hurt like a bitch, but there are other, quicker means than biting. I’d do it Buffy. To protect Dawn, I’d do it.”

Silence settled over the group again. They watched as the Slayer and vampire stared at each other for a long moment. Buffy made her decision, and the Scoobies recognized her resolve. Giles lowered his head.

“No,” she said plainly.

“Buffy—” Spike started to argue, but she held up a hand to stop him.

“No, Spike. I know you could do it. I know to protect Dawn you’d be willing to…but I can’t let you. You changed. You’re trying to be a better person. I can’t let you throw that away, and I won’t. I won’t be responsible for a human’s death, and I won’t let you be either. Not anymore. We find another way, but you aren’t going to kill again. Not even to save the world. Understand?” She didn’t so much as blink as she stared at him.

Spike wasn’t sure it was the smartest decision, but he knew she meant it, and he could tell that it meant a lot to her and meant a lot for them. He understood why she couldn’t allow him to do that, and he was grateful she was trying to help him redeem himself. Spike didn’t believe in redemption the way his grandsire did. He knew the things he’d done outweighed any good he might do in the future, but he’d follow her lead. He wouldn’t kill again, not even if it seemed right. He’d earned her trust, and he was going to keep earning it.

“Okay then. No killing Ben. Understood, Slayer.” Spike nodded.

Buffy softened her gaze at him, telling him silently how thankful she was, and also how proud she was of him at that moment.

“So, I guess we make a trip to the Magic Box to pick up the mystical items we need then?” Willow asked.

“Yep. It means I’m going to have to leave here though. That hammer is too heavy for anyone else. Super-strength is required.” Buffy chewed on her lip.

“Well, we could stay here and make sure everything’s okay. I’m sure I could zap Glory away again if I had to, only I’d need some supplies. And Tara and I were thinking about this spell, a really strong one that we’re not sure will work, and will take a lot out of us if we can pull it off, but it might weaken Glory. We still aren’t sure, but we might be able to do it if you can distract her.” Willow was practically bouncing in her seat, thinking she could help fight the hell-god, if Buffy could weaken her first.

“What sort of spell?” Giles asked, curious.

“One that could help restore some of the minds she sucked dry. It would make her unstable, fuzzy. Her tie to reality would weaken,” Willow explained.

“Sounds good. Okay then, you guys go get your stuff, and get back here as soon as you can. Once you’re back I can head to the Magic Box and get the hammer and Dagon Sphere.” Buffy took charge of her little group. Pleased they had something to do at last.

Tara and Willow left almost immediately to fetch supplies. Joyce and Dawn came back downstairs. Dawn wanted to be at the meeting, but Joyce had decided it would be less of a worry for her to hear the battle plan, or lack thereof, until Buffy had worked out something concrete to tell them. Giles and the Slayer explained to the Summers clan what they were preparing to do, reassuring them that there was a high possibility they could come out of this on top. Spike watched with interest as his Slayer rallied her troupes, the fire back in her eyes, as she prepared for battle at last.

What they didn’t know was that the battle might have arrived sooner than they expected, as a number of shadowy figures approached the house on Revello Drive.

Chapter 28



Buffy was in the middle of working out Xander’s sudden addition to the battle strategy when she froze. Every one of her senses tuned in to what was approaching outside. She looked up and saw Spike similarly rigid, tensing up as he noticed it too. Their eyes locked, and Spike nodded, heading straight for the weapons chest, while Buffy looked through the windows in search of the threat.

“What’s going on?” Xander asked, bewildered.

“Vampires,” Buffy said, her lips forming a thin line as she scanned the driveway. “Lots of vampires.”

“Vampires?” Xander repeated in disbelief.

“They won’t be able to get in without an invite,” Spike commented.

“True, but they can keep us trapped and keep Willow and Tara from getting back. Not to mention, they could always—” Buffy was cut off by Giles, who was now looking out the window.

“Smoke us out?” The Watcher asked.

“What?”

They all headed for the windows, only to see two of the vamps carrying Molotov cocktails.

“Don’t they know fire and vamps don’t mix?” Buffy questioned, as she pulled an axe and several stakes out of her weapons chest, handing some to Spike.

“Where are you going?” Joyce asked, panicked.

“Out there,” Buffy replied. “I can’t let them burn down the house with us trapped inside, and there’s no way we can just make a break for it. Stay safe, and we’ll deal with this. Vamps we can handle, and Glory isn’t around.”

“Don’t you think this has trap written all over it?” Xander asked, none too keen on having them leave the house either.

“I know, but that doesn’t change the fact that we can’t just sit here waiting for them to burn the place to the ground. “Here,” She handed Giles a crossbow. “you guard our backs against the window, but be careful to avoid those fire bombs. Xander, if they break through, I want you to make sure Dawn and Mom are safe, got it?”

The young man nodded and watched as Buffy and Spike ventured out into the war zone. He heard smashing bottles just before the door closed. After making sure Anya, Joyce and Dawn were safely away from any windows or doors, he grabbed a second crossbow and joined Giles in covering his friend’s backs.

“Is it just me,” he asked, as he dusted a vamp preparing to chuck one of the lit bottles at Spike. “or is there something familiar about those vamps?”

“If you mean the clothes, then I would have to say yes,” Giles answered, picking off another vamp who tried to approach his Slayer from behind while she dealt with two others. “Army gear.”

“Commandos,” Xander said.

Both men shared a grim glance before turning their attention again to the fight outside.

***

Buffy quickly staked two vamps, but was having a harder time with a third. The commando clothes hadn’t gone unnoticed by her. The soldiers had been tough, but nothing she couldn’t handle without breaking a sweat. Now, they had an edge, and clearly, they hadn’t forgotten their training, so they were a little more difficult to deal with than normal vamps. She caught sight of Spike out of the corner of her eye, and had it not been for another vamp rushing her, she would have found it difficult to look away.

Spike was having the time of his un-life slaying the vamps. There was nothing like a fight to make his demon roar with excitement, and this was his chance to get revenge on the wankers who had made him vulnerable to humans and forced him to go against everything he was. That it had led him to Buffy was the only bright side, but he couldn’t spar with her or help her fight human attackers like those knights, so he was more than happy to dust them. He was in full vamp face, kicking, punching, and staking vamps as fast as they attacked. Not only was he getting his revenge, he was protecting his family which made him a vicious opponent.

Though they were handling the vamp army well, the duo was also being drawn further away from the house, despite their best efforts to stay between it and the vamps. Giles and Xander were doing their best to fend off any that came too close, but it wasn’t enough. A fire bomb smashed through a window and landed in the living room, instantly erupting in a huge blaze that spread to the furniture. Dawn and Joyce screamed and backed up into the kitchen with Anya. Giles rushed to try and put out the blaze, but it was no use. The fire was too hot to approach and spreading too quickly. Xander grabbed him and ushered him toward the kitchen.

“C’mon, we need to get them to safety!” He yelled.

Giles was torn between getting them all to safety and feared they would most likely be walking into a trap if they left. Another look at the roaring blaze in the room they had just vacated made his mind for him. After a quick scan of the backyard, he was relieved to find no sign of vamps or hell-gods, and he ushered them out.

Xander took the lead, Dawn close behind with Joyce and Anya on either side of her with Giles taking up the rear.

“Where are we going?” Joyce asked, keeping a firm hold on her daughter’s arm and looking around anxiously.

“The Magic Box. That’s where Buffy’s weapons are, and it has a similar protection spell to the one here. We might not be able to use a troll-god’s hammer, but at least we have the Dagon Sphere and an armory, not to mention a full stock of magic supplies,” Xander answered without hesitation.

They barely made it down the block before their path was blocked by someone they thought they’d never see again. They all halted in shock. Giles and Xander moved to shield Dawn, crossbows raised.

“Riley?” Xander asked, confusedly.

The tall man took a step closer, but paused when they adjusted their weapons, raising his hands in a defensive gesture. He had changed out of his army gear, not wanting to highlight the fact he was part of the group attacking the house.

“Hey, relax. I’m here to help.”

“Of course you are. Your entire unit showing up as vampires attacking the house obviously supports that notion,” Giles said coldly, never taking his eyes off the other man.

“Giles, come on. Do you honestly think I’d try to take you on by myself if I’d been turned, when there was a whole army of my men around? I would have made sure to block your escape, fence you in. I’m a tactical man, Giles. If I wanted to take you out, I wouldn’t have offered an easy escape route.”

“That’s just it, Riley. They’re your men. Care to explain how they got vamped and why we would ever trust you? Oh, and there’s the whole trying to kill Spike thing that I know you aren’t over.” Xander drew his old friend’s attention, for the first time disliking the soldier.

“I’m not one of them anymore. Fact is, that stunt over Spike got me dishonorably discharged for needlessly endangering my men. That mistake saved my life. I spotted one of them feeding, and when I checked on the place, I found them, most dead, others turned. The place was a bloodbath. I don’t know how, but I’m pretty sure Glory was behind it. I don’t see any other reason for them to attack you. I tracked them here. I want to help. I know you’re at war with her, and that bitch killed my friends, turned them into the things I hate most. I want to help take her out.” Riley lowered his hands, staying put, his eyes flickering from Xander to Giles. He could see the younger man wavering, and Giles had lowered his weapon a few inches.

“But you still tried to kill Spike. You just said you hate vamps the most. How do you expect us to trust you? You can’t fight alongside Spike, so how can you expect to help?” Dawn argued, angry and mistrustful of her sister’s ex.

Riley lowered his head to hide the faint smile crossing his face. When he looked up again, he was doing a good impression of remorseful and hurt.

“Dawn, I’m not forgiving when it comes to demons. I’m prejudiced. I admit it. I don’t see how they can be anything other than evil. Spike can’t hurt people because of the behavior modification chip. I don’t understand how he can be good just, because he’s been forced to be tame. I have no love for him. The guy pushed my buttons from day one, and when he took Buffy from me…” He paused and rubbed his head before looking back up. “But what matters is you all trust him. But can you honestly tell me you were that accepting when you found out? That you didn’t want to stake him yourselves?”

Xander and Giles took those words to heart. It was true they’d thought about killing Spike, but they’d learned to deal with it, and they’d never been as obsessed with killing him as Riley so obviously had been.

“Some things are bigger than vendettas. Glory will destroy the world if we don’t stop her. That’s what matters right now. Once we stop her, I’ll leave. Promise. There isn’t anything left here for me.” Riley waited, watching them.

He could see they were still unsure and edgy, but he also saw the crossbows were now pointing at the ground. He bit his tongue to keep from grinning.

***

Buffy kicked a vamp’s legs out from under him and staked another who had been standing behind him before dropping to the ground and turning the first to dust. She saw one vamp bypass her heading to the house and threw her stake, implanting it in his back, making him explode into dust, the stake dropping to the ground. Through the remaining dust particles she finally noticed the orange flames licking the house through the windows.

“No! Dawn!” She shouted, running for the house.

The few remaining vamps blocked her way, and she struggled with one while another went for her throat. A third turned to dust, and suddenly Spike was there. Yellow eyes flashing, he reached for the vamp who was trying to sink his fangs into Buffy, gripped him round the head with both hands, twisted, then pulled. The vamp’s head was torn right off, the gruesome sight lasting seconds before he too disintegrated. Buffy shrugged the other vamp away and caught the stake Spike tossed her, dusting him. They took off for the house, but the flames blocked their entrance.

“Dawn!”

Spike had to hold Buffy back. She was prepared to run straight into the house. Before their eyes the flames suddenly lowered before extinguishing altogether. A glance behind them revealed Willow and Tara, hands joined, obviously having used a spell to put out the flames. They finished the spell, their concentration shifting to worry and ran after Buffy and Spike who flew into the house. After confirming no one was in the house, Buffy ran to the back door and turned to Spike.

“Where are they?”

He sniffed the air, trying to track the group through the scent of ash and smoke.

“They headed that way,” he said nodding in the direction they had gone. “Prob’ly headin’ to the Magic Box. That was the next port of call and prob’ly the safest place.”

The four took off, hoping to catch up to their friends and praying they were okay.

***

“How can you help?” Xander asked.

“I have the jeep. We can get to the Magic Box a lot faster that way, safer too. What do you say? You want a ride, or would you rather risk walking out in the open like this?” Riley waited patiently.

The men shared a look. Anya was watching both of them anxiously, keeping one eye on Riley. He seemed genuine, but he really hated demons, which had always made her very nervous around him. Joyce and Dawn stepped a little closer to each other, still unsure about trusting the former soldier, but much preferring the thought of faster transport.

“Okay. But you lead the way, and if I suspect you have an ulterior motive…” Giles let his sentence drift off, but held the crossbow a bit higher.

Riley nodded and turned to lead them to where his jeep was parked. Once he rounded a corner he made a quick signal with his hands before the others following him could see. The jeep was just up ahead. The gang relaxed a little when they saw it. They were only a few feet away when the Slayer’s voice reached them, calling for her sister. Giles turned just in time to see a commando vamp grab him roughly by the shoulders and toss him across the street, where he hit the pavement with a thud.

“Giles!” Xander shouted, turning quickly, crossbow ready to shoot the vamp.

Another vampire was ready for him and snatched the weapon away, breaking it and punching Xander hard. Anya jumped on the vamp’s back before he could bite Xander, but it took mere seconds for him to fling her off and send her and the young man tumbling to the ground. Dawn squealed as Riley grabbed her from behind and tried to haul her to the jeep, his vamp face in place. Joyce’s eyes widened when she realized he was a vampire, but the sound of her youngest daughter’s screams shocked her into action, and she grabbed Dawn’s other arm, starting a tug of war with the furious vamp.

“Let go!” He roared at her, but Joyce clung even tighter, trying to kick him away.

Dawn was struggling too, making his grip on her weaken. Joyce could hear Buffy’s voice getting closer. If she could just hang on until they got here.

“Grab her!” Riley ordered the other vamps.

“Buffy!” Joyce shouted as the two vamps grabbed her arms and pulled her back.

“Mom!” Dawn cried, seeing Joyce flung to the ground as Riley hauled her backwards, opened the rear door of the jeep and flung her in, diving in behind her. One of the vamps got in on the other side, while the second ran to the driver’s seat.

Giles was up and running toward the jeep when the engine sprang to life. Xander and Anya joined him, racing forward. Joyce got to her feet in time to see Buffy and Spike fly past her towards the vehicle before it took off with a squeal of its tires. They chased it down for a while, but it was futile. The jeep picked up speed and got away. It turned a corner and vanished and only then did Buffy stop running.

“Dawn!” Buffy cried, sinking slowly to the ground.

Spike came to a halt behind her and just stared at the spot where the jeep had vanished. The others looked on. Dawn was gone. They’d failed. Joyce burst into tears and only Tara’s support kept her upright as shock and anguish flooded her.

***

“No, no, no. It’s all wrong! Jinx, I told you everything must be perfect. This robe is scratchy. I can’t do my big ceremony and have my grand return home ruined by a scratchy robe. Now, get those useless excuses for seamstresses in and fix it!” Glory tossed the offensive garment at her most loyal servant.

“As, you wish, oh great Glorificus. Nothing but the finest material shall touch your most delicate and beauteous skin,” Jinx gushed, handing the robe to a lower minion and shooing him away while managing to bow to his divine mistress.

Riley took in the sight and grinned at the pathetic demon, sucking up for all he was worth. He cleared his throat and the two turned to him. Glory scanned him up and down and tapped a foot, one hand on her hip.

“Well?”

He smiled, flashing his fangs and stepped aside, motioning for the two vamps holding Dawn to step forward. They dragged the frightened girl into the room to stand in front of Glory who placed both hands over her mouth and did a little excited hop. Riley bowed low, putting on a show for the vain hell-god.

“Your Key, oh magnificent one.” It was really difficult to keep the mocking tone out of his voice, and he caught Jinx’s glare.

“My Key. You got it. Oh, aren’t you precious? Such a naughty little thing, being that close to me and never telling me. But it’s all okay because you’re here now, and we can finally get this show on the road. “You” she stepped towards Dawn and ran a hand through her hair gently, ignoring the young girl as she flinched away, “are going to open the door, and let me go home. Now, don’t you feel special?”

Dawn pulled back and the vamps holding her tightened their grip, making her wince. Glory noticed and smacked one of them lightly on the head.

“Now, boys, don’t go damaging her before it’s time. She has a very important job to do tomorrow night. You hungry, Dawn? I can have my chef whip you up something if you’d like? Can’t have you feeling all weak and poorly. Need that blood of yours pumping away so we can open that door.”

Dawn kept her mouth shut, leaning as far away from Glory as she could possibly get.

“You know, it’s really rude not to answer when your generous host asks you a question little girl. You’re lucky I’m in a good mood right now. Okay, take her to her room, and keep her guarded. I don’t need to tell you what’ll happen if you don’t.” She sing-songed the last part and with a flick of her wrist, sent them away.

Dawn struggled uselessly as she was hauled away. Riley smirked at the death glare she shot him when she was pulled out of the room.

“My sister is so gonna stake your ass.”

“Not likely. Your sister’s not that good Dawn. If she was she could have stopped Glory a long time ago and saved you.” He watched as she was led away, then entered Glory’s room and sat down.

Jinx hurried over and tried to stare him down, clearly signaling the vamp to leave. Riley barely glanced at him before looking back to Glory.

“So, I trust I’ve pleased you? I delivered. I’m going to get a reward when this is over?”

Glory played with her hair before plopping down onto a couch and opening a box of chocolates, moaning as she bit into one.

“When everything goes smoothly and I go home, and if you survive the Slayer’s predictable last stand tomorrow, yes, you’ll get your reward.”

“Think she’ll still be up for a fight even after you have Dawn? She hasn’t been able to do much to you yet. You don’t think it’ll be too much for her?”

“Well, you’re the one who dated her, you tell me. She the kind of girl who gives up when the odds are stacked against her?” Glory took another bite of the chocolate, savoring it while she waited for his answer.

“No. Actually I’d say she fights even harder. She’ll be at her best.”

“Well then,” Glory ate another chocolate before tossing the box away, picking up her champagne and taking a sip, “it’s a good thing I’ll be on top of my game too. Not only will I be even more powerful, I’ll outnumber her little gang too. And with what I have set up, there’s no way she’ll be in time to save the girl. The Slayer’s about to realize her place in the world. Beneath me.”

***

The subdued group sat in the magic shop and waited for Buffy to come back in. She’d heard something in the alley out back and had gone to investigate. They looked up when they heard the door. Buffy walked in, arms folded and made her way to the little table they were gathered around.

“Something going on?” Xander asked.

“Vamps. The usual kind, out looking for an easy meal.” She shrugged.

Joyce was staring at the table. She hadn’t said a word since she stopped crying on their way to the shop. She didn’t answer when anyone spoke to her. It was like she wasn’t even there. Buffy looked her over, wanting nothing more than to comfort her, but the only way she could do that was to bring back Dawn. So that’s precisely what she was going to do.

“We know when this ritual takes place tomorrow night, which gives us a full day to prepare for battle.”

They all looked up at her. It was clear she was as determined as ever to fight this out. She had their full attention.

“Nothing’s changed. We’re still fighting Glory, only now it’s to take Dawn back. The plan goes ahead. We have the hammer, we have the sphere, and we have each other. Willow, locator spell. I want to know where this is going down.”

The redhead nodded and began setting up the spell.

“Xander, it’ll take you some time to set what we talked about up, so once we work out where this is happening, I want you start getting ready. Tara, you and Willow make sure you have enough energy for what you have planned. I don’t want you exhausted and hurting yourselves. I need Glory weakened. Giles, you and Spike need to find Dawn and get her to safety once I have Glory distracted.”

“Buffy, I have it,” Willow called.

“Where?” Buffy asked, making her way over to the map Willow had spread out on the table.

They all checked the location. Xander pointed at the spot excitedly.

“Say, that’s perfect. Buff, I may have something else up my sleeve than what we originally thought. You just get Glory in position. I need to go set this up. I’ll explain when I get back.” He grabbed his jacket and ran out the door.

They watched him go before Buffy went back to distributing orders.

“Riley was an unforeseen factor in all of this. He’s in our way, and it’s because of him that Glory has Dawn. He’s messed with the people I love for the last time. I want him eliminated. “Spike,” the blond locked eyes with the Slayer, “that chip of yours shouldn’t be a problem now. He’s yours.”

Spike’s eyes flashed yellow, his demon howling inside at the thought of fighting the newly vamped ex-soldier. He nodded, his face set in determination. Joyce shifted in her seat and they all turned to look at her. She turned hard eyes to Spike, her hands gripping the table as she spoke.

“Make him feel it, Spike. I want him to know when he’s about to become dust.”

The cold tone of her voice was like nothing they’d heard from her before, except for Spike. He had a flash back to her holding an axe over him, protecting her child. She was scary enough to make a master vamp turn tail and run, even though she was just a human.

“I can guarantee it,” Spike answered.

Joyce nodded and looked back at the table, relaxing her grip. Giles was unsettled by Joyce’s behavior, though he agreed with her, finding her tremendously scary at that moment and was in the middle of polishing his glasses when Buffy spoke to him.

“Giles, you’re definitely going to want to stay conscious for this battle.”

He frowned indignantly. As if he was planning on being knocked out when they were in the fight of their lives. It’s not like it was ever his fault. He didn’t have super-strength to just bounce back when he was hit over the head or thrown against a wall. He opened his mouth to say so when Buffy held up a hand.

“I was never good with keeping a diary of my Slaying activities, and as my Watcher I’m relying on you to document how this goes down. I know for a fact the Council will want a report, and it will definitely be useful for future generations. After all, I’m about to take down a god.”

The Watcher grinned as understanding dawned.

“I can assure you, nothing will keep me from witnessing this. I have complete faith in you, Buffy. Glory won’t know what hit her.”

The atmosphere in the shop brightened significantly with a battle strategy worked out. They prepared their weapons and waited for Xander’s return. They got what little rest they could, anxiously awaiting the right time to head out and face Glory. It was time for the final showdown.