Chapter One
Buffy let the girls wander a few paces ahead of her. Letting them put themselves in danger was always a risk, but they'd never learn to be good fighters if she was always protecting them and rescuing them. Her job was to just watch them unless things turned really ugly. Lily was so new that Buffy was reluctant to add her to the group, but the Council declared her ready. Rose had been in training for a year. Soon she'd be off to partner up with one of the active slayers. Deirdre? Well, Deirdre was probably grateful for a little distance. She had been Octavia's roommate and even since she'd gotten up the courage to go to Giles and Buffy about what was going on with Octavia and David, she had been shy around the senior slayer.
David. She gently placed a hand over her belly, over the spot where the baby wasn't.
It still hurt to think about it. It was probably for the best, or so she kept telling herself. Slayers didn't make great mothers, and since David had turned out to be a lying cheating pervert it wasn't like he would have been much of a father either. But she had to admit that amid all the worry and hand-wringing, there had been a more than a little thrill.
The moment she saw that plus sign on the test, after weeks of denying anything was up, she'd started thinking about decorating the second bedroom, baby names and Xander building a crib. Knowing that her career wasn't exactly conducive to a healthy pregnancy, she'd had an excited, whispered conversation with Giles about temporarily retiring.
Then one morning she woke up knowing something was wrong. The doctor tried to comfort her by telling her that sometimes these things happened and showing her the statistics and assuring her that she was young and could start trying again right away. Two months later she was still waking up feeling alone and empty. Training the girls usually kept her mind off it, but Deirdre's solemn looks were bringing it all back tonight.
"Buffy!"
She snapped her head up to see a pack of vamps converging on someone taking a shortcut through St. John's. "Go!" she shouted to the girls, quickly catching up with them.
The battle was short and the girls fought well. Lily tensed at bad time, but she was still learning. In fact, the only one injured was Buffy when one of the freshly risen vampires managed to smash her into a headstone. Compounding the throbbing in her skull was Rose, who after a year still hadn't learned to just tell the victims to go home.
"I'm Rosie!"
"Um. Jean. Hi. Oh, and thanks?"
"It's cool. It's what we do."
"Rose..." Buffy cautioned
"Yeah, well, you do it good. Thank you."
"It's really Buffy you should thank, oh and Spike. He's the best trainer but he's never around enough because he also works for this guy in LA, and--"
"Rose!"
"... I wish he was here more often."
Buffy sighed. "We all wish there was plenty of Spike to go around," she said quietly. Even though he barely spoke to her and was still mad about a bunch of stuff that she hadn't actually done, she missed him too. How long since he'd last been in town? Before she lost the baby, before she even knew about the baby? The pounding in her head was too distracting to think through. She pulled herself up and smiled wryly at the cemetery-wanderer. "Look, Jean, it's really better not to take shortcuts through graveyards at night."
"Done," the girl agreed.
"Buffy, are you okay?" Deirdre sidled up to her as they started heading back toward the council dorm. St. John's made four cemeteries, which was enough for one night.
"Oh my god! Your face is all purple!" Rose informed her.
Lily looked horrified. "It's my fault. You had to pull that guy off me, and he hurt you. I suck!"
"You don't suck," Buffy assured her, but man, her head hurt. "Everyone needs a rescue now and then."
It seemed like hours before she got back to her little townhouse. It was really way more house than she needed since Dawn only stayed with her on mandatory school breaks, but Giles insisted on getting her something nice when they made the move to Cleveland. Occasionally visiting watchers or slayers would bunk in her spare bedroom. Buffy kicked off her boots and dumped her weapons by the door. She found a bottle of Advil in the kitchen cabinet and washed it down with some apple juice. Climbing the stairs just seemed like too much work, so she pummeled one of the throw pillows into shape and curled up on the couch, hopefully to sleep until noon.
-------
No such luck.
It was the sound of the coffee maker sputtering to life that woke her. She was pretty sure she hadn't opened the drapes or remembered to set up coffee the night before. Also, there was the day's paper and a bag from the bakery around the corner on the kitchen island. No way was Dawn home from school in the middle of April, but what kind of demon broke in to make coffee and bring her pastries?
He was sitting on the bench out back with mug in hand, sunlight streaming down on his pale face, glinting off the unnaturally blond hair. She stared at him.
Apparently she had hit her head a lot harder than she'd realized.
"Spike!"
The apparition turned and smiled at her and rose from his seat. She wished he'd hurry getting out of the light. It was freaking her out.
"Good morning, pet." He frowned at her. "What happened to your face? And what the hell did you do to your hair?"
Buffy wasn't really paying attention, because he was real; his fingers were on her face. They were too warm and there was a simple gold band on one of them. His ears were edged with pink from the sun and she could feel blood pulsing in his fingertips.
"You're alive," she managed.
His frown deepened. "How hard did you hit your head, Buffy?"
She stepped out of his reach. Something was wrong. How did he get inside her house? "Who are you? What are you?"
Spike grabbed her arm and marched her inside. She let him. After all, he was only human and she could overpower him if she needed to. Unless this was all some sort of weird trick. Had he gotten split in half or something, like that time with Xander? But the wedding ring... Why was he at her house? He seemed a little surprised by her too. Had she slipped into another dimension in her sleep, like the world without shrimp or had someone done a spell, like Jonathan? She really wanted some of that coffee.
He pushed her to sit at the kitchen table. "Alright, you just sit and rest, love. God, I wish you'd said something last night if you were that hurt. I'll go check on Celia and call Willow."
Willow? Celia? What the hell was going on?
A moment latter he came roaring back down the stairs. "Where is she? All of her things are gone."
Buffy shook her head. "Look, Spike -- or whoever you are, the only Celia I know is my dead cousin."
"We named our daughter for her."
A little whimper escaped her. "We don't... we don't have a daughter."
The Spike-shaped stranger glared at her. "Who are you, and what have you done with my wife?" He seemed so genuine, like a man really panicked to find his world changed on him. She didn't think it was a trick. She'd seen this sort of thing before, like when Willow's evil twin had shown up. He was from somewhere else, apparently somewhere happier.
Buffy laughed. It was all she could do really. "Look, one of us is in the wrong place. And I'm guessing it's you because everything looks normal to me here. Except you. Did you walk through a dimensional portal recently or anything?"
He made a number of faces, but finally took a heavy seat across from her at the table. "We should call Willow."
Her face fell further. Another thing that was different in his magic universe. "Giles. Here we call Giles."
squawks
05/18/17 04:16 am
pj! I remember wishing one of your stories would be finished seriously about a decade ago. Amazing. I just tried an old password I used to use and amazingly got in too. Memories!
pj
03/20/17 01:20 am
10 yrs later, i finally rem my username and password. Pari, you rock. Hope you are well.
Rabbit_moon1
12/23/16 01:12 pm
I donate every month. Please donate to keep this site up!
AudryDaluz1
10/06/16 08:34 am
Great post.
Chrissel
08/31/16 03:45 pm
And anyone else who loves this site, it's worth mentioning there's a nifty little "Donate" option just below the shout box here! ;)
Chrissel
08/31/16 03:43 pm
Just wanted to take a moment to thank Pari and all the mods for maintaining such a great site!
05/18/17 04:16 am
pj! I remember wishing one of your stories would be finished seriously about a decade ago. Amazing. I just tried an old password I used to use and amazingly got in too. Memories!
pj
03/20/17 01:20 am
10 yrs later, i finally rem my username and password. Pari, you rock. Hope you are well.
Rabbit_moon1
12/23/16 01:12 pm
I donate every month. Please donate to keep this site up!
AudryDaluz1
10/06/16 08:34 am
Great post.
Chrissel
08/31/16 03:45 pm
And anyone else who loves this site, it's worth mentioning there's a nifty little "Donate" option just below the shout box here! ;)
Chrissel
08/31/16 03:43 pm
Just wanted to take a moment to thank Pari and all the mods for maintaining such a great site!