Summary: Silliness.
Explanation: Dare's obsession with U2 brought this on.!
Rating: PG
Once upon a time in Ireland, land of Leprechauns and Riverdance, there lived a very talented young man by the name of Paul Hewson. He knew he was destined for fame and stardom, so he decided to change his lame name into something fit for the stage, for conquering the world; yes, that's right, he decided to name himself after a hearing aid store! So alas, Bono Vox entered this world, and along with David "The Edge" Evans (who had the mentality to name his daughter 'Blue Angel'), Larry Mullen Jr, and everyone's second favorite loon with bad hair (the first being Kramer of course) Adam Clayton, formed the unforgettable band U2.
But this young, raw group was troubled, for though they could write tunes that captured the turmoil and trouble of an embittered youth in a country of civil unrest, their lyrics were somewhat lacking. For try as he might, the best young Bono could come up with was "I fell in a hole in the street/i was wearing sunglasses at night/used to have boy scout shorts/but I gave 'em away cos they were too tight" Among some of the other nuggets of unrefined writing talent was the following: I had a friend/snot turned him on/but he tried to snort Taster's Choice/ and now he is gone. Their biggest hit so far was "Don't Warn the Tadpoles."
Yes, pathetic it was. But don't fret, for the dark days were nearly over. One day, while walking down a street in Dublin, Bono was stuck by the immense beauty of what could only be a goddess. He crossed the steet to see her better, nearly getting his cute ass run over by some guy on a moped named Jean-Pierre and depriving the world of the greatest band ever. Shameless promotion of author's favorite band! He could tell she was American, and so he decided to use what his American Internet friend Julito had told him was the hottest pick-up line around.
"Hey baby!" he said "Who's your daddy?"
She looked at him like he was the most vile, disgusting pig around. She slapped him and walked away.
Bono, only more determined to pick her up because of this, pounced on her like a cat who is chasing a mouse and then catches it and eats it right in front of his owner, who is mortified and embarassed because it was right in the middle of her very important tea party that would get her a membership to Rolling Meadows, the most prestigious of country clubs. "Who's your daddy?" he tried again, thinking that she had heard him wrong the first time.
She kept walking. Bono's heart sank. A lone tear rolled down his cheek, and he became even more upset when he realised that he had left his violin at home. Luckily, a young man by the name of Angel was nearby and he whipped out *his* trusty instrument and struck up a maudlin tune. "I have a weakness for belly dancers," he mumbled.
The young woman stopped and turned back to him. "What did you say?" she asked.
"I said I have a weakness for belly dancers," Bono repeated.
"Cool io! I just happen to be schooled in the ancient Irish art of belly dancing!" she told him.
"My name's Bono. What's yours?"
"Dare."
And so they lived happily ever after together, and through his many orgasms Bono achieved artistic enlightenment and wrote the hit songs that U2 is known for today.
end
Tell Dare you love her just as much as Bono does