RATING PG
CONTENT It's for general reading.
SPOILER WARNINGS:season 4,and a specific reference to "Hush"
SUMMARY: Riley is exposed.Complete story.
DISCLAIMER I don't own these characters. Joss Whedon, the WB and Fox do.

Giles was trying to figure out what was bothering him ever since Buffy brought Riley over so they could all get to know each other better.

Sheesh.  And he thought Angel was dull and sleep-inducing.

Anyway,ever since the lovebirds left, Giles was agitated.  And then,he got a clue as to what was bothering him.  He went up to his bookshelf and started to look for the answers he was searching for.

* * * *
Buffy and Riley were in her dorm room making out.  It would have been enjoyable, except for the fact that each step they took, Riley always ruined the mood with a: "Buffy,is it alright that our courting has led up to this moment?"

And he kept asking it!  Each time!  At least when she made out with Angel, he only asked once and then got a clue.As he was asking the question for the millionth time, the phone rang.  Freedom!  Buffy stopped Riley and picked it up.

"Hello?" "Buffy?" "Giles?"

For some reason, Riley started to button up his shirt.  Buffy restrained the urge to roll her eyes.Did they not know that you can't see through the telephone in Iowa?

"I hope you don't mind that Buffy and I are expressing physical love sir!"  Riley yelled into the phone. Oh.My.God!!

"What was that?" Giles asked.

"Uh,nothing." Buffy covered.   Thank God for small favors.  "What is it Giles?"

"I need you to meet us all at my apartment . . . but don't take Riley with you.It's important."

"Giles, what is it?" Buffy asked, looking toward Riley with concern.  He just stared at her with no expression on his face.  Just like Angel . . .except that with Angel, for some reason it seemed cute and sincere and charming then.  Riley was like one of those Borg thingies.

"I'll tell you-just meet us-without Riley." With that, he hung up.

Buffy hung up and sat up.  "Riley, I gotta go.Giles need me to help him move some furniture."

Riley put a concerned hand on Buffy's shoulder.  "Buffy, I'm sorry, but that's no kind of work for a girl. Why don't I do it for you and Giles and I can have some good old fashioned fun like we did out in the Midwest.Why, we used to have barn-raising parties where we moved all the antique furniture-"

"Uh, no that's ok Riley-it's really small cat furniture." Buffy went to the closet and put on her coat. "You can just hang here 'till I get back.   It shouldn't take too long,k?"  She gave him a quick peck on the cheek.  "See ya."

"Goodbye.I shall be counting the minutes until we meet again." Riley purred.

Ugh.Buffy hoped Riley didn't see her shudder in the moonlight on her way out the door.

Buffy entered Giles's house to see Giles, Willow, Xander, and Anya waiting for her. "Ok,what's that what?Why couldn't Riley come along?" she demanded.

"I waited until we were all here so I would only have to say this once."  Giles explained.He put a hand on Buffy's shoulder. "Buffy-Riley is a demon."

Buffy's face looked like what Riley's often looked like-that is,blank."What?"

"He's a Replacement Lover." Giles told.

"I can't believe I didn't spot him as one!" Anya bemoaned."I'm losing my touch . . ." Xander gave her a small comforting hug.

"Is that bad?"  Willow asked, hoping for Buffy's sake that it wasn't.

"I'm afraid so."  Giles replied.  "Buffy, has Riley been . . .reminding you of anyone?"

Buffy shook her head."No . . . why??  Giles, what's a replacment lover??"

"Just like it sounds.  A demon who replaces a girl's ex-lover in personality or looks or both,and them slowly starts to suck all the personality and savvy and intelligence out of her.He need this to make himself look good, because without the girl, he is just a dull demon who no one will tolerate without the girl.  He latches on to the girl, sucks before said things out, then she becomes a mindless zombie and he moves on, because if he stays with her, then they would both be mindless zombies who no one would want to be around."

Buffy looked at Giles with eyes full of realization."Giles . . . are you saying I picked a guy with the same personality as Angel?"

"Angel had a personality?" Xander joked,half-serious.Then something dawned on him."And Riley doesn't either!!!"

"Giles, how did you figure this out?" Willow asked.

"After Buffy brought him over, something troubled me.  Then it dawned upon me: Riley.  Later on, I recognized his constant blathering of Iowa as a sign of a Replacement Lover.  Iowa is their codename for the dull dimension they come from."

Buffy took this all in,and then spoke up.  "Maybe he's from the U.S.A.,Iowa, Giles!  Geez!"

Giles shook his head.  "Buffy, he was too dull and robot-like not to be using it as a codename."

Xander and Willow exchanged a look.  "Buffy, I think Giles knows what he's talking about." Willow said.

Buffy realized it was true.Always known it was true."Yeah, I think so."  Buffy agreed.  Then, the spunk that Riley had started sucking away started to return."And now, I want my revenge." She grinned wickedly.

"Can we come?"Xander asked with excitement.

"I always enjoy the destruction of a man." Anya said, started to get excited herself.

"Of course." Buffy permitted."He should still be at our place."

"Do you think he touched any of my stuff?" Willow said with a worried face.

Riley was sitting on Buffy's bed, reading, when the Scooby Gang came in."Buffy! . . . and her friends." as he saw the rest come in behind her.

Buffy stood before him, reclaiming her personality."I know your secret, Riley."

"The Initiative?" Riley replied. "I know you know it Buffy.What's going on here?"

"Not that one pal." Xander answered for Buffy.

"This one!" Buffy said, punching Riley in the face."You may have my ex's personality,but you don't have his hotness, hon!" As she started pummeling him, she said in between rapid punches,"Giles, how do I kill him?!!"

"You have to say spunky, savvy, intelligent, funny things until he explodes!" Giles informed.

"Can do!"Buffy cheerfully complied.She stopped punching Riley, not wanting to waste energy.  Anya was a little disappointed when she did.
"Can not!!!" Riley said as he got up off the floor.  He put both his hands around her neck and lifted her off the floor. "I'll suck it all out!!!"

The gang started to beat up on him, but it was no use-they were physically not a match for him.  Riley laughed."You can't kill me like that!!"

"Yeah well . . . so your face!!!" Willow said, trying to help Buffy out.

"Only Buffy can kill him with personality." Giles told Willow.

"You may have nice arms," Buffy gasped, "but they . . .um . . suck!!"

"Shup up you ignorant female!!!" Riley ordered.

"Sorry sirNo-can-do."

"I said,shut up!"

"This- isn't your- lame named Initiative,-soldier"

"I said shut up before I smack you!" Riley yelled.  Buffy could feel his grip become looser.

"Don't even try."

"Don't speak to me like that!  Learn your place woman!  In Iowa,the women-"

"In Iowa??  Or Dull and Duller Dimension??"  Almost there . . .

"Would never speak out of turn!!!"

"Well, then, guess you must be a woman Riley, cause you never spoke out of turn at the Initiative." Buffy smiled. "Or maybe Professer Walsh was wearing the pants in the place!"

SPLAT!!Riley exploded in a Gentlemen-like way.  Buffy was back.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
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