Andrew: Think they'll let my aunt bring me my discman?
Jonathan: That's what you're worried about -- in-flight entertainment? We're in jail!
Andrew: We're in custody. We haven't been charged yet.
Jonathan: Thank you, Dragnet.

Jonathan: That guy's been looking at me. I think he wants to make me his butt-monkey.

Jonathan: I hear they like small ones, with little hands like their girlfriends.
Andrew: You have got to chill out. This isn't Oz. It's like Mayberry.

Andrew: I miss Ferris Matthew. Broadway Matthew... I find him cold.

Jonathan: He's a nice murderer. He keeps his word.

Warren: This isn't the evil laugh of victory, is it?
Vamp: More like the evil laugh of "You're a dead man."

Vamp: I was gonna eat you myself during the commercial, but now I think it'll be more fun to let the Slayer de-gut you.

Rack: You're new.
Warren: Yeah, but I come bearing dead presidents, so you think we can just skip the small talk?

Xander: You gotta stop doing this. this dying thing's funny once, maybe twice.

Xander: Will, would you cut that out? If you wanted to drive...

Buffy: I'm finding the whole getting shot very motivating.

Xander: I think Buffy gets the tie-breaker on this one. She was the one on the ouch end of the bullet.

Xander: And can I just ask, what's with the makeover of the damned?

Buffy: Are the police gone too?
Xander: Coming back tomorrow with more of their pretty yellow tape.

Clem: Suffering cats! Where did you come from?

Demon: You seek me, vampire?
Spike: You do the fingerpaintings? Nice work.

Demon: Look what she's reduced you to.
Spike: It's this bloody chip.
Demon: You were a legendary dark warrior and you let yourself be castrated.

Xander: Anya was saying she knows where Willow is.
Buffy: A spell?
Xander: Not exactly. Seems Anya got her vengeance on again.

Warren: It was an accident, you know.
Willow: Oh... you mean instead of killing my best friend, you killed my girlfriend?

Katrina: I should have strangled you in your sleep, back when we shared a bed. I should have done the world a favor.

Willow: You get off on it. that's why you had a mad-on for the Slayer. She was your big "O", wasn't she, Warren?
Warren: Are you done yet, or can we talk some more about our feelings?

Willow: Something, isn't it? One tiny piece of metal... destroys everything.

Willow: Bored now.