Chapter Fourteen ~ Ain’t Love a Kick in the Head ?
Summary: Let's get ready to ruuuummmbbble ...
“Like the fella once said – ain’t that a kick in the head?
My head keeps spinnin’, I go to sleep and keep grinnin’,
If this is just the beginnin’ my life is gonna be beautiful.
I’ve sunshine enough to spread. It’s just like the fella said;
Tell me quick , ain’t love a kick in the head? ”
~ Dean Martin
Buffy was coming at him with a stake in her hand, wearing a murderous
look on her face. But it was her eyes that were killing him now. There
was a fire in them Spike was hypnotized by. They burned into his,
brimming with passion and fury. Thank God she didn’t have an axe in her
hands, ‘cause she looked hell-bent on homicide. Why didn’t he care about
that exactly?
He only knew he felt alive right now and there was nowhere else he
wanted to be. Nothing existed outside the circle of her regard - however
deadly that regard might prove. Her face was flushed with rage, her
long, fair hair streamed out behind her. She looked like a warrior
goddess, like a Valkyrie in flight.
*Tell Valhalla I’m coming…*
He thought, unrepentant. She was on him in a moment – a blur of motion
as she attacked. He could have laughed with the joy of it. It was all so
right, just as it should be between them – as it had been from the very
beginning. How long was it since they’d truly fought? It felt like an
eternity. His only regret was that he could not give her the battle she
deserved. The chip would not allow it. He could block her, and as long
as he had no intention to harm her he was fine. But he missed the dance.
Their dance.
Spike would take what he could get right now though. And watching her as
she tried to beat him within an inch of his un-life was pretty damn
good. Her skin was glistening with a light sheen of sweat, her hair
mussed, lips moist and parted as she panted from exertion. She was the
most entrancing thing he had ever seen. He could hear the pounding of
her heart, feel the heat coming off her in waves – but best of all he
could smell her. There was a light tang of ginger-lily mixed in with the
scent of her excitement. It made his mouth water. She was more aroused
than she had ever been around him before and it thrilled him to no end.
He knew it was for him, all for him…
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Buffy was beating him down with everything she had. But he never stopped
smiling. He just ducked and weaved, blocking her when he could. She used
the stake like a set of brass knuckles, buttressing her punches. She
managed to smash him in the jaw, and watched his head snap back with
satisfaction. Bastard. She kicked him square in the chest and watched
him fly a dozen feet landing hard on his ass. It made her want to giggle
hysterically. She noticed how giddy she felt, how high. She was actually
enjoying herself. This didn’t surprise her too terribly much – she’d
always loved fighting him. No one else challenged her like Spike. Even
now, when he should be five minutes from a total K.O., he was still
holding his own.
As if to prove her point, he leapt up from the ground and came stalking
back, grin still firmly in place. Buffy whipped off her jacket and
tossed it on the grass. She placed herself in a fighting stance: body
cocked to one side, leading with her right fist. She was ready for him.
“ Feel better, Kitten? Release some of that nasty tension?”
His voice was oozing with insincerity. She shot him a brightly vicious
smile.
“ As a matter of fact, I feel great. But then again I always did enjoy
kicking your ass.”
“ Tell ya a secret, Pet…” He whispered conspiratorially “ So did I.”
He winked at her and pursed his lips in a mocking kiss.
It had the desired effect, inciting Buffy to lunge for him. He avoided
her neatly, but found himself staggering back from a solid boot to the
head a minute later. He laughed, ears ringing.
“ That’s right, Baby. Put it all on me.”
He shook his head to clear the bells and stood his ground, eyeing her
impudently.
“ You know it’s no good for you to be so bloody pent up, Slayer.”
He said with mock concern, dancing like a boxer in front of her. Ready
for Round 10.
Ooooo! He was so infuriating. What did it take to beat him down? His ego
was unbelievable! She’d used him as a human punching bag for the last
half hour. He couldn’t even hit her back for God’s sake! But there he
was, cocky as ever – smiling, laughing, taunting her. His mouth just
kept working overtime. What the hell was it gonna take??
Buffy looked her adversary up and down, sizing him up – taking him in.
As if he was a puzzle she could solve with careful study. His platinum
hair glowed in the darkness and the moonlight played on the sharp,
handsome planes of his face. The blood on his lip only accented the
finely cut sensuality of his full mouth, which was twisted up into an
insolent smirk at the moment. He looked dangerous and sexy and far too
pleased with himself.
She was reminded of a line from Peter Pan, and could practically hear
Spike crowing it now:
“ Oh the cleverness of me! ”
That struck a chord – there was only one thing that ever quieted the
Pan.
Finally Buffy seized upon the single thing in the world that would shut
Spike up.
She kissed him.
Chapter Fifteen ~ Ring of Fire
Summary: Time for the (extremely graphic) naughty bits... Cue the Barry White please.
“Love is a burning thing, and it makes a fiery ring.
Bound by wild desire, I fell into a ring fire.
I fell in to a burnin’ ring of fire.
I went down, down, down and the flames went higher.
And it burns, burns, burns, the ring of fire.
The ring of fire.”
~ Johnny Cash
Was this really happening? Was Buffy actually in his arms right now? One
minute she was beating the piss out of him, the next she’d launched
herself at his mouth. The feverish heat of her body seared him through
his clothes. Her mouth was so hot and wet and inviting – and her body,
thrumming with life – the musky animal tang of her blood and her flesh.
It was fiercely intoxicating. This was so much better than anything he
could have possibly imagined.
*If this is another dream I don’t ever want to wake up.*
Her hands wound themselves in his hair while she kissed him ravenously.
Now that she started this, she was lost in it. There was no thought
involved, just the final, overwhelming urge to join. Her body rejoiced
madly. ‘At last, at last it!’ it cried. The feel of him was incredible –
he was cool everywhere she was hot, soothing the aching fire that had
been burning her for days now.
Her legs wrapped around his waist of their own accord, seeking
closeness, seeking contact. Her arms snaked tight around his neck as she
clung to him. ‘More, more, more!’ her body howled. She felt like she was
starving for things she didn’t have names for, things only he possessed.
It was perfect, mindless connection – a feverish and deeply primal
thing. All questions, rationales and plans snuffed out of existence like
candle flames, leaving Spike the only light in that darkness.
He was waiting for spontaneous combustion to kick in. She was a live
flame in his arms, liquid sunshine that was about to burn him up from
the inside out. When she wrapped her legs around him he gasped from the
raw heat of her pressed up against him. He was barely containing
himself, his demon was screaming to get out – to take her right here,
right now. To fuck her and drink her till he’d had his fill. But Spike
wanted more than that, he wanted to lay her out and enjoy her, taste her
- love her. For more than just one night, more than a week, a month or a
year. Forever was on his mind, and at the moment it seemed like barely
enough time.
He pushed her up against the nearest convenient tree, grinding his rock
hard length into her sultry heat. His hands sought contact with her
naked flesh and wormed their way up under her clothes. He caressed her
exposed back with one hand, reveling in the silk of her skin – while the
other found her bare breast underneath the camisole. She moaned at his
touch and tightened her legs, writhing against him.
God, how he’d dreamt of this. So many nights longing for her – and now,
this moment – it was so much better than any fantasy he’d ever had. She
was blisteringly hot, and he could feel her arousal soaking through the
crotch of her jeans. The smell of it was driving him mad. He didn’t know
how much longer he could hang on before he literally ripped her clothes
off and simply took her. He wanted to taste her so much, to feel her
thighs wrapped around his neck. He wanted to make her come more than he
wanted blood right now. And to be inside her? He wanted that more than
he wanted to live.
Her nipple was a hard little pebble against his palm, and he pulled away
from her kiss to taste it. He gently set her on her feet while he moved
down her body to expose her breasts. They were unbelievably perfect –
small and firm, just the right size for his hand. He licked between them
and was gratified to watch a row of goosebumps pop up where his tongue
had been. Her flesh was delicious, tinged with the salt of her sweat –
her nipple like rough satin in his mouth. He swirled his tongue over it
enjoying the texture, while he rolled the other one between his thumb
and forefinger.
She was panting hotly and making little mewls of pleasure. He moved down
her stomach, kissing it and licking it slowly until he was on his knees
before her. The smell of her sweet, dripping cunt was like a drug for
him. He inhaled deeply, savouring it. He undid the button on her
low-rise jeans and carefully unzipped her. This was so much farther than
he’d ever hoped to go, it almost didn’t seem real. But here he was on
his knees, about to do what he had only dared dream.
She was wearing a pair of ivory lace panties sheer enough to see her
dark curls through. His mouth watered for a taste of her, and he wasn’t
about to deny himself the pleasure. He pulled her g-string down and her
jeans open as far as he could – not wanting to take them off quite yet.
He wanted to draw out every single moment of their pleasure. Using his
fingers he spread her lips open slightly and then slid his tongue in
between them. Buffy arched into his mouth with a strangled cry. He
snaked his tongue inside her as far as the limited position would allow
and was rewarded with a flood of her juices. She was so wet for him –
for him. The thought made his already hardened cock swell and throb
against his jeans.
*Soon, soon…*
He thought hungrily. He pistoned his tongue in and out of her ,
savouring such an intimate taste of his beloved. She panted and shivered
lacing her fingers through his hair – holding on while the world spun
dizzily around her. He pulled out to flutter over her clit with a series
of light, teasing strokes. When he wrapped his lips around it and sucked
it into his mouth Buffy cried out and her knees buckled. He rose up to
steady her, pinning her against the tree.
“There, there…” he soothed, “Daddy’s got you now.”
He kissed her soundly, sliding his tongue into her mouth and twining his
hand in the silky hairs at the nape of her neck. He worked his way to
her throat, scraping it lightly with his teeth and teasing it with
gentle flicks of his tongue. She whimpered helplessly, completely under
his thrall now. He took her hand and placed it over the solid bulge in
his pants.
“ See what you do to me… how much I want you.”
He said huskily. She moaned and grasped it through his jeans, making him
shudder. He sucked her lower lip and gently bit it, savouring the taste
of her and then proceeded to kiss her languorously. When his hand found
its way back inside her saturated panties she cried out against his
mouth while squeezing his cock firmly. The pleasure-pain of it made him
want to come right then and he struggled for control.
He caressed her clit with his middle finger for a moment then worked his
hand in between her legs to slip a slick digit within her. Buffy gasped
causing him to look at her. He was caught for a moment by her radiant
green eyes. They reflected the same powerful desire and hungry yearning
he felt for her. He slid another finger inside and watched her pupils
dilate with the pleasure of it. Staring into his eyes she moved her
hands to his jeans, unzipping him and freeing his erection.
He groaned as he felt her hot little hands wrap around him. So soft and
warm against his naked flesh. She caressed the head with the pad of her
thumb, swirling the pearl of moisture that had collected there over it
in a circular pattern. Now she had him panting. Eyes locked on his she
raised that thumb to her mouth and sucked it, humming with pleasure at
his salty taste. The gesture undid him.
With a ravenous growl he crushed his mouth to hers, hand clutched in her
hair, pulling her to him fiercely. He slid his fingers deeper within her
and added his thumb to her clit, circling it. Kissing him violently she
used his foreskin to manipulate his cock, sliding it up and down over
the length. It was so cool, so large – she wondered how it would feel
inside of her, if it would put out her blazing fire.
They devoured each other with kisses while their hands worked furiously.
She spread her legs wider for him as he slid his fingers further inside.
Spike braced himself against the tree with one hand as she industriously
stroked his cock. He could feel her orgasm coming on, her thighs
twitching and muscles just starting to contract. When her wandering
fingers found their way to his nipple and tweaked it he knew he wasn’t
far from his own either. He located her G-spot and then stroked over it
with both fingers in a ‘come hither’ movement. Buffy rewarded him with a
wail of pleasure, then doubled her efforts. He didn’t want it to end yet
though, Spike wanted to take her somewhere and make it last all night –
maybe all week.
“ Baby, Buffy – please. Want you so much…let me...let’s...”
He murmured into her ear, resting his forehead against hers.
“ Yeah, Spike…so good. Close…close now…”
God, she’d said his name. Told him how good it was. He could die happy –
almost.
“ Love, let’s go somewhere…lemme take you somewhere…”
What? What was he saying? Go? Where was there to go? There was only
here, and how he was making her feel right this second – like the entire
Universe was about to explode. She felt his fingers driving deep while
his thumb ground down on her sensitive clit. God, it was so fucking
good, like nothing she’d ever felt before.
“ So close…Oh God...” She whimpered in his ear.
Ah, Christ - she was so wet, and he wanted to be inside her so much.
Wanted to feel that slick intoxicating heat closing all around him.
“ Baby, let’s go now…wanna take you to my crypt … to my bed. Let me take
you…do you proper…” He panted.
If he could just get her home… God, he wanted to strip those clothes
off, wanted to have her in his bed with room to move and time to explore
every bit of her. He’d keep her there for the next month…
“What?”
She asked, startled. What did he say? Her hands stopped moving.
“ I said; let me take you home, Pet. Do you proper.”
He managed to gasp, hand still working it’s magic.
“ That’s not what you said.”
She stilled that hand, pulling away.
Oh God, he said crypt... He wants to take me to his CRYPT! What am I
doing? What have I done?
“ It is. Just want to get you into my bed, Love – you know pillows, room
to maneuver?” He kissed her shoulder. “Clean sheets instead of the
ground…”
“ You said CRYPT Spike.”
He stared at her, completely bewildered.
*What’s she going on about?*
“ You said crypt. And I can’t do this.”
“What?”
“ I forgot for a minute. But now I remember. And I. Can’t. Do. This.”
“ What? Wait. WHAT??”
She was pulling away from him, zipping up, tucking away all that
delightful flesh. He could see her almost visibly retreat inside
herself.
“ You said crypt, Spike.” She repeated as if to a singularly stupid
child. “ You said CRYPT - you want to whisk me away to your crypt like
it’s the ‘No Tell Motel’ and what?! You can’t even love me, you have no
soul, you’re a fucking vampire and I don’t have any fucking idea what
I’m doing anymore!!”
“ Angel was a vampire.”
He said quietly, carefully putting away his now painfully throbbing
erection.
“ Angel had a soul.”
Her voice was flat, as if this were a well-established fact they had
discussed a thousand times.
“ Ah, but not all the time, yeah? And therein lies the rub.”
Spike adjusted himself carefully, vainly seeking a comfortable position.
“ What the hell are you talking about? Speak English.”
She smoothed her clothes and found her jacket on the ground. Brushing it
off she studiously avoided his eyes. His voice was soothing, seeking to
calm her.
“ I was, Pet. But no matter. My point is that Angel had a soul, ’cept
when he didn’t and that’s what you’re afraid of.”
Buffy threw up her hands in frustration and started pacing.
“ What I’m afraid of is the agonizing oblivion that lies at the end of
this road. Been there, done that. Got the t-shirt that says: ‘My
boyfriend was a homicidal vampire and all I got was this lousy guilt
complex.’ ”
She said in her best sarcastic tone. She tried to make him understand;
“ I know this story, I know how it ends. With death and pain and
destruction. I won’t put the people I love through that again. Hell, I
won’t put MYSELF through that again.”
“ You do NOT know the end of this story, ‘cause you don’t know me! I’m
not bloody Angel!”
He shouted, losing patience. She eyed him coldly, sizing him up and
finding him wanting.
“ You’re right – you’re not Angel. You’re not half the man he is.”
He was stunned, he felt as if she’d slapped him. To be compared
unfavorably with the Poof, that manipulative buggering fuck! It made him
feel ill.
“ And don’t I know you, Spike?” she continued with cruel precision. “My
perfect enemy? My nemesis? William the Bloody – Killer of killers?
Slayer of Slayers? The scourge of Europe…blah, blah, blah…”
She dismissed him and all his titles with a haughty flip of her hand.
“ That’s not me anymore.”
His voice held a quiet conviction.
“ Why? Because you have that chip in your head? That’s not a substitute
for a soul, Spike.”
“ Never said it was, but it doesn’t mean that I can’t love you, Buffy.
Because believe me I -”
She held up her hand – stop in the name of love.
“ Don’t say it! Just don’t…”
He pleaded with her;
“ But I’ve changed! And not just because of the chip! Because of you,
I’ve changed because of you. You make me want to be a better man, Buffy
– and I can be.
I can be a good man, for YOU.”
Her voice rose to an almost hysterical pitch;
“ But you’re not a man! And it wouldn’t matter even if you did have a
soul – you’d still be a vampire. And I’m not going there anymore. I just
can’t.” She shook her head, adamant – then continued, “ Don’t you get
it? I want normal, I need normal! I need Riley, he’s strong and stable
and reliable…”
Spike sighed and lit up a cigarette.
“ Sounds like a bleedin’ draft horse, not a boyfriend.”
He took a long, steadying drag and began pacing out his frustration.
“Haven’t you figured out yet that there is no normal? Normal’s just the
status quo. Look around you – your best friend’s a gay witch, vampires
are real and you live on a Hellmouth. Guess what, Princess – this is
about as ‘normal’ as you’re likely to get!”
She rolled her eyes at his stubborn lack of comprehension.
“You know what I mean Spike. I want average-normal, sitcom-normal. I
want a nice boyfriend; I want to go to college. I wanna have a good life
with my friends and family and a little happiness. And most of all I
don’t want to have to kill any of them!”
Spike stopped pacing and looked at her squarely. Gently, patiently he
tried to explain;
“ Well, I’m sorry, Love. But that’s just not the lot you drew. You’re
the Slayer, like it or no. And that means you have to kill things. Maybe
even someone you love someday. But doesn’t that mean you should reach
for your happiness with both hands now, while you can? Doesn’t that make
it all the more precious?”
Frustrated at the brick wall she was throwing up, he growled;
“ And what’s so soddin’ fascinating about normal anyway? Normal is bland
– normal is boring. And that’s the last thing you are, Pet. I’d wager
it’s the last thing you need too…”
“ You DON'T know what I need! And you DON'T KNOW ME!” She shouted.
He matched her in tone and volume;
“ YES I BLOODY WELL DO! I know you better than you know yourself, and
that’s what scares the piss out of you. This just might be the real
thing, and you can’t handle that. Too scared to love because you might
be hurt. Too scared to love me because of what that might say about you.
Angel you could justify, rationalize. He had a soul and all that shite.
But what if that had nothing to do with it? What if you just wanted him
- his demon, his darkness. What if that’s part of why you want me?”
Buffy just gaped at him, speechless.
“ You say I’m a monster, deficient without a soul. But at least I
recognize love when it comes knockin’, and I’m not so much of a coward
as to run from it. What’s your excuse?”
He paused, waiting for an answer. When none was forthcoming he
continued,
“ You’re never gonna be happy, Love – not as long as you keep running
from yourself. Darkness is part of what you are. Accept it. Deal with
it. Then maybe you can move on and stop lying to yourself for a change.”
She said nothing, just stared at him – completely stunned. It was
obvious she wasn’t prepared to deal with any of this yet. Spike sighed
and ground out his smoke. He suddenly felt utterly fed up with the whole
buggered affair. She didn’t wanna deal? Fine. He’d had enough.
“ Let me know when you do. Until then I have better things to do with my
time.”
He had a gratifying moment of triumph before he walked away from her.
*Guess I’m not Love’s bitch after all.*
He thought with a smirk.
But it was only a moment, and it was gone all too soon.
**A/N ~ Awww, c'mon now - you didn't think it was gonna be that easy did
ya? I know you wanna kill me, but it's gonna be so worth it in the end,
I promise. Stay tuned true believers... Next Chapter by Wednesday...
xoxoxox Rosie **
Chapter Sixteen ~ Tainted Love
Summary: The sad aftermath of Buffy's stubborness... And Eros calls in the calvary
“ Sometimes I feel I’ve got to run away, I’ve got to get away –
From the pain you drive into the heart of me.
The love we share seems to go nowhere.
And I’ve lost my light – I toss and turn, I can’t sleep at night.
Once I ran to you, now I run from you –
This tainted love you’re giving – I give you all a boy could give you,
Take my tears and that’s not nearly all – tainted love.
Don’t touch me please; I cannot stand the way you tease…
Oh, tainted love…”
~ Soft Cell
Spike managed to make it out of her eye line before the tears started.
The frustration, the tension, the months of unrequited adoration built
up until they broke him. He stumbled home in a daze, not quite believing
what had happened. How had he gone from being on the verge of making
love with her to breaking it off before it ever got started? In the
gloom of his crypt he nursed a bottle of Jack and let them fall where
they may. He intended to spend the next week inside a bottle, possibly
longer.
Oblivion was the only thing that’d keep him from staking himself right
now. He’d just lost the one thing he still cared about – the only thing
that was keeping him going. And if he was honest with himself, he loved
her more than he had ever loved anyone or anything ever - in life or
unlife.
Just why he couldn’t say. There was simply something about the girl.
There always had been. He’d come to town to kill her, but her light –
oh, her light. It was so very bright. It blinded him and drew him in
until it was too late. Now he was a burning carcass falling to his doom.
Never realizing she was a blazing candle and not the moon…
*Now I’m waxing poetic about sodding moths.*
“Ya sad bastard.”
He toasted himself with the bottle of Jack in his lap, taking a deep
draught. No wonder Angel was such a great brooding pillock. She did have
that effect, didn’t she? But Angel had left her, had willingly left her.
He deserved what he got. Though… what was it that he just did? Didn’t he
just walk out on her as well?
“ Oh, Bloody Hell!”
He laid his head in his hands. What in buggering fuck just happened? How
did it…? Why?
“ Sweet fucking Christ. What a miserable cunt I turned out to be.”
He could have laughed at this ugly little quirk of fate. Things had gone
completely arse over tit in a matter of moments. Somehow, in the midst
of everything – he had managed to turn into fucking Angel…
He ground his palms into his eyes and prayed;
“Please God, Stake me now…”
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Buffy stood there for a full minute, completely stunned. Her jaw
practically unhinged itself it was hanging so far open.
*What just happened?*
Did Spike just leave her? Did he really walk away from her? Wait a
minute…
*Did Spike just tell me to get my shit together?*
What alternative Universe was she in anyway? Was this Bizarro World
where up was down and black was white and… Buffy felt dizzy. She bent
over gulping huge lungfulls of air. Her thighs were twitching from all
the unreleased energy and her body felt electrified. What had he done to
her?
*Oh, you mean aside from almost giving you the best orgasm of your
life?*
Bad Buffy Brain was back, and in a foul temper apparently. But she
hadn’t done anything wrong!
*(Other than kissing him in the first place, and we’re just glossing
right over that, right?) * She’d told him no. She stopped the badness.
She stayed true to Riley, her boyfriend.
*(Mostly)*
So then why did her brain go into attack mode? And why did she feel just
exactly like shit right now? She did the right thing. And if Spike
walked away that was for the good. He should know it’s over, and nothing
like that could ever, ever happen again. And if that meant that she
never saw him again, that was for the best.
“Yes, definitely.”
She nodded to herself – assuring, agreeing. She was right. This was the
end, it was better this way, really.
So much better, in fact – that she began to cry.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Eros had had enough. This girl, this Slayer was the most obstinate
creature he’d encountered in a good century. What could possibly be the
problem? Here was Love, in it’s truest earthly form presented on a
silver platter. What more did she want?! Yet still she ran, even in the
face of her obviously overwhelming desire for the boy - though she cried
even now at his loss. And they had been so close to consummating their
love! It was a gorgeous and extremely arousing display. He’d rarely seen
such unfettered passion among mortals – or immortals for that matter.
For a moment there, he actually thought his work here was finished.
He sighed, deeply aggravated and ran a hand roughly through his wavy
hair, sending the golden strands into chaotic disarray. It was
definitely time to bring in the big guns…
“ Don’t do that, Darling. It makes you look like one of those ragamuffin
surf-bums.”
Eros whirled, heart in his throat. Before him stood the glowing Goddess
of Love herself. At nearly 3,000 she didn’t look a day over 30. Her
long, fair hair cascaded down her shoulders, tiny flower blossoms weaved
in among the strands and her ivory skin seemed to be alight with it’s
own glow. As always he was completely awestruck by her beauty.
“ Mother! You startled me, I was just about to call on you.”
Aphrodite smiled indulgently at her wayward child, her rosebud mouth
curling at the corner.
“ Yes My Dove, I know. I felt your frustration all the way in the other
realm.”
He smiled back sheepishly.
“ That bad, eh?”
She patted his arm affectionately and winked.
“ A mother always knows, Poppet.”
He smiled at the radiant goddess and embraced her warmly. Her soft pink
robes smelled like heavenly roses and fresh honeysuckle. He was
instantly calmed by her presence, and sighed with contentment.
“ Over two thousand years old and I still find I need you.”
He laughed ruefully and shook his head.
“ Heavens forefend you should ever stop, Cherub.”
She cupped his face with her lily-white hand fondly. Smoothing his silky
hair back into place she looked at him with eyes the exact color of the
Aegean Sea.
“ Now what’s all this nonsense about the Slayer?”
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Buffy made her way home in tears. She thought she’d cried it all out of
her system on the walk back to her house, but she found them creeping up
on her repeatedly. In the kitchen getting dinner, in the shower washing
her hair and now brushing her teeth. It was getting ridiculous. She was
just glad Mom and Dawn weren’t up to question her about it.
The last thing she wanted to do was talk about this right now.
She finished brushing and swiped angrily at her eyes with a tissue. She
felt absolutely wretched. She had a headache from crying, her stomach
was in knots, and to make things just that much more ultra-fun: she was
irrationally horny. You’d think all the crying and misery would be
enough to nip that right in the bud.
*And what is a bud exactly anyway?*
She thought nonsensically. But nooooo. Her body seemed to care less what
was going on in her head. It only knew that it had been rudely
interrupted, and it wasn’t finished yet. She’d found her hands lingering
in naughty places all on their own during her shower. She’d felt too
upset to do anything about it then. But now, as she lay down to sleep –
feeling like she’d just downed a double-shot of espresso – she thought
she might actually have to do something about it now. Or face yet
another sleepless night.
Buffy sighed irritably and flipped over, fluffing her pillow with
unnecessary force. She thought about calling Riley for a second, but an
immediate flash of guilt cancelled out that idea. Not to mention that he
might not (ahem) get the job done. She shoved her face into her pillow
wanting to scream.
Why, oh why, did Spike have to be so good at that? I mean she had her
suspicions before, but now – now she KNEW. And it was one thing to
suspect and a whole ‘nother thing to know, ya know?
*Oh Yeah. Definitely.*
‘Cause now she knew how his voice got low and rough when he was aroused,
and that his eyes turned so dark they seemed black. Now she knew what
his mouth felt like on her skin. How his tongue felt as it teased her
neck, licked her nipples and sank itself deep inside her. She felt
herself getting wet just from the memory of it. His tongue was so cool
on her hottest place. She longed for him to make her come that way, to
feel his whole mouth on her, devouring her.
*Bad brain!*
She scolded. But Bad Buffy Brain didn’t seem to care. It had places to
go, things to do – and they all involved Spike.
*Just call me Amtrak.*
She thought wryly. Oh, God – Riley! How was she ever going to face him
again? After everything that happened tonight. After all she did with
Spike. Jesus, she still couldn’t believe it herself. Tonight, IN
REALITY, she’d practically fucked Spike in a cemetery. She groaned into
her pillow. Shady Glen was just never going to be the same...
The bad part was that it was good. Scratch that, it was incredible – the
best ever. Or would’ve been if she’d actually let herself come. She
pulled another pillow over her head, hoping to smother somehow. What’s
worse was that more than she regretted cheating on Riley right now…
*(and let’s be honest that was so cheating.)*
She regretted not finishing things with Spike. And not just for her –
for both of them. Alone in her bed she could admit that – a part of her
desperately wanted to see the look on his face when she made him come,
wanted to give him that pleasure. The thought of that look gave her a
deep, tingling twinge. And she liked the feel of his cock in her hands,
she could admit that too. It was so large and cool and so very hard. It
made her want to get on her knees and take it in her mouth right there,
right then – and she had never felt that way before. (Not even about
Angel.) Then after that she wanted to throw him on the ground and slide
it inside of her. Wanted to feel it filling her up, pushing against her
womb, making her come and come... Like she knew he could, like he gladly
WOULD if she’d only let him. Buffy groaned into her bedding, imagining
it all too vividly.
*And why aren’t we letting him again?*
Bad Buffy Brain asked innocently.
At the moment she was honestly stumped.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Aphrodite listened intently to her son’s story. A tragic tale of
frustrated love between a vampire and a Slayer – certainly one of the
more unique tales she’d ever heard. And that was saying something. There
was the time that Zeus turned himself into a swan and… her son’s voice
interrupted this train of thought, fortunately.
“…So you can see my problem, Mother. Nothing seems to have worked yet.
I’ve done all but shoot the both of them where it would do the most
good.”
Eros frowned petulantly reminding her at once of the mischievous child
he’d been not so long ago. She almost expected him to stomp his sandaled
feet and howl like a banshee – a trick he’d picked up from Pan. It used
to scare the Hades out of the local shepards, giving him no end of
satisfaction. She smiled adoringly at him.
“ Now, now, My Lamb. Don’t work yourself into a Pan-ic.”
That drew a sideways grin from the boy.
“ I’d forgotten about that. Not that the denizens of Sunnydale would
notice. Have you seen the amount of supernatural activity around here?”
He dismissed the thought and began pacing, troubled.
“ I just feel so wretchedly out of practice! I’ve done little but play
lackey for the Gods and the Powers these many years. I’ve forgotten the
way of things, Mother. I’ve forgotten Love.”
He placed his head in his hands, filled with regret. Aphrodite rose and
put her arms around him, shushing and comforting. She raised his head
from her shoulder gently and looked deeply into his clear azure eyes.
“ My Darling Boy – you have forgotten nothing. You were made from Love!
You have only strayed from your path; as we all are want to do from time
to time. Even we Gods.”
She wrapped her arm around him and continued their walk through the
stillness of the cemetery.
“Has it never occurred to you that the Powers brought about this
situation not only for these lovers, but for you as well?”
He shook his head wonderingly, and asked;
“ But why?”
*Ah, the ignorance of youth.*
She thought fondly, cupping his cheek.
“ So that you would be reminded of your calling, Eros! So you would
return to your true path, inspired by Love once more.”
The boy goggled at the notion, stopping in his tracks. Revelation just
dawning. A singularly beautiful smile crossed his face, lighting him up
like a blaze of heavenly sunlight. Had any mortal seen it, it would have
meant their doom…
A lifetime of unrequited worship at the feet of the God of Love.
**Just got word that our little fic has been nominated for "Most
Origonal Storyline" and
"Best Fluff" at the Love Bite Awards!
http://www.lovebite-network.info/awards/nominees.html
I send big semi-naughty snuggles to whoever nominated me... xoxoxoxoxox
Rosie **
Chapter Seventeen ~ Painted on My Heart
Summary: Buffy gets a clue, Spike gets off...
“ I’ve tried everything that I can to get my heart to forget you,
but it just can’t seem to.
I guess it’s just no use – in every part of me, there’s still a part of
you.
I’ve still got your face painted on my heart, drawn upon my soul,
etched upon my memory, Baby. And I got your kiss still burning on my
lips,
the touch of your fingertips are still so deep inside of me, Baby.
…Something in your eyes keeps haunting me.
I’m trying to escape you, but I know there ain’t no way to chase you
from my mind…”
~ The Cult
There was no sleep to be had this night. All he could think about was
her. And how seriously he had cocked it all up in the space of a single
evening.
*A hundred and twenty odd years and I still know sweet fuck all about
women.*
Spike shook his head and drank from bottle number two for the night. The
unfortunate thing was that he was seriously drunk – but not drunk
enough. He was beginning to wonder if it was possible for him to EVER
get drunk enough to forget Buffy – even temporarily. He had his doubts.
Possibly maybe, if he made it to the black out stage. He was more than
willing to give it a go.
The problem was; everything they’d done that night was burned into his
brain, and no amount of alcohol seemed to erase it. Whenever he closed
his eyes he was set upon by vivid flashbacks. The way she’d first kissed
him, like she was starving for him. How she’d wrapped her legs around
him, scorching him with her heat. How he’d tasted her breasts, her
flesh, the sweet wetness of her quim. Her hot little hands wrapped
around his cock. Spike banged his head against the back of the battered
easy chair, wishing for something harder – like cement maybe.
*All too soon, Mate –You’ll find yourself on the floor and have your
wish.*
He tipped the bottle back for a deep draught. Not soon enough though.
One after another – scenes of the night replayed in his head over and
over and over - in screamingly torturous detail. Fuck, he could
practically taste her right now.
*Sweet as a sun-ripe peach she was... *
He growled in frustration, grinding his fists into his eyes. But this
only assisted him with picturing her naked breasts and the damp chestnut
curls of her sex. His erection throbbed painfully.
“ And YOU!” he addressed it, eyeing it menacingly. “I’ve had it up to
here with you. Look wha’ kinda trouble you get me into! Can’ think
prop’ly when you’re around, y’ bastard.”
His penis paid him no mind, bobbing along jauntily – hard as ever. He
took a series of long pulls from the bottle of Jim Beam then set it back
in his lap, carefully avoiding his unbearably stiff prick. He scowled at
it with disapproval.
“ Why don’t ya just slag off, ya waster!”
*Damn vampire constitution.*
Normally the alcohol would have done it in by now, at least softened it
up a little. But not tonight. Christ, he could cut diamonds with the
thing! He was damn sick of looking at it, to tell the truth. Not to
mention how bleedin’ uncomfortable it was. Only one thing for it then.
“ Right.”
Probably shoulda done it hours ago. Spike stood up unsteadily, bottle in
hand. Then carefully made his way down to the lower level of his crypt.
Time for a good long wank.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Buffy tossed and turned for the next hour, her mind filled with images
of Spike. What they’d done together, what they could do – what she
WANTED to do. Something about him made her feel free, like she could ask
for anything – do anything and it was all good. She could be anything
she wanted to be in his presence. She’d already done things with him
that very night that were WAY outside her realm of experience.
Buffy – made out like the world was ending in a graveyard with a vamp.
She’d gotten pretty much naked in a public place and let him lick her
and touch her and taste her – everywhere. And she didn’t give a damn.
She didn’t care about anything in that moment but him, and how they made
each other feel. It was as if the entire world ceased to exist outside
the little erotic lust-bubble they occupied. And that was a dangerous
thing – he was dangerous. Why was that so damn exciting?
Why did she get wet just thinking about him? It was so frustrating! He
was the wrong guy! Couldn’t her body see that? Couldn’t her mind tell
the difference between good guy and bad guy? She had a vivid flash of
Spike on his knees in front of her. It made her shiver all over.
*Apparently not.*
This was torturous. Why couldn’t it be Riley she felt this way about? He
was a good guy.
Although, in all their many patrols he had never tried to do anything
more than kiss her.
Not once. Riley liked his Love American-style – at home in bed, in the
missionary position with the lights safely off. Buffy yawned
unconsciously. Okay, so he wasn’t the most exciting guy in the world.
But the sex was pretty good. Or at least she thought so until Spike came
along…
“Errrg!”
She growled into the quiet night. Why did he have to come along anyway?
Why didn’t she just stake his ass years ago? Then she’d be a happy
little camper. Miss Normal 2000 with her college sweetie.
*Yeah, good. Cause ignorance is bliss right?*
Bad Buffy Brain snarked sarcastically. She was really beginning to
resent this little rebellion her mind seemed to be having.
“ I can always have you lobotomized you know.”
*Great, now I’m talking to my own brain. What’s next? Wearing my
underwear outside my clothes?*
She flipped on to her belly moodily and promptly buried her head under
her pillow.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Spike stood in the cement shower stall of his crypt, cock in hand for
what had to be the third time that day. He let the hot water beat down
on him as his mind filled with images of Buffy. Only this time he didn’t
have to make them up, he didn’t have to try to imagine what her body
looked like. He had the real thing emblazoned on his brain. This was
both a blessing and a curse. A blessing in that it made the wanking all
the better, his mind could now provide him with a Technicolor, 3-D
fantasy Buffy in vivid Scent-O-Rama. But a curse because he knew he
would never forget it, never forget HER – not ever. Probably not even
after he was long dust and a permanent resident of Hell.
“Fuck ME ...”
He spluttered, realizing he would never be rid of her. That might have
been said with more irony if he’d registered the fact that was exactly
what he was about to do. But you’ll have to forgive him, he is quite
horribly drunk...
He braced himself against the wall of his shower with one hand,
preparing to go to town. There was no help for his mind; she already had
a permanent hold of it. But he could do something for his body at least.
The pathetic bit was that there was only one thing that would get him
off right now – Buffy. Spike sighed and leaned his whiskey-heavy head
against his outstretched arm.
*I surrender.*
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Buffy flounced over on to her side irritably. Why did things have to be
so complicated? She absolutely did NOT want to be having these feelings
for him. For SPIKE, of all people! But God, the things he did! The way
he touched her. No one had ever made her feel that way before, like she
was lit up from the inside. She felt so…good …when she was around him
lately.
All alive and juicy and desirable.
Riley never made her feel like that… No one did. Just Spike. And if she
were really honest about it – he always kinda had. He’d gotten her going
since the first night she met him. The way he talked to her, his
cock-sure swagger. He’d sauntered into town like he owned the place and
told her straight to her face he planned on killing her. It’d been one
long bout of foreplay ever since. Only it took her till just now to
realize it.
*It’s not like you never fantasized about him before.*
This was true, she admitted reluctantly. Sometimes, in bed with Riley –
thinking about fighting Spike was the only thing that could get her off.
And lately…well, lately she wasn’t just thinking about fighting him now
was she? Her skin felt very warm suddenly. When she looked at it that
way, thinking all the way back to the beginning – Buffy could see that
this had been building for a while. Years even.
*Damn.*
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Spike stroked steadily, eyes closed – remembering… The musky tang of her
sex pressed up against his nose as his tongue was buried inside her… The
searing heat of her hands wrapped around his cock, pumping it hard –
squeezing it tight right at the head. Bloody perfect. He groaned her
name huskily;
“Buffy…God, Buffy…”
Then his mind turned to everything he’d wanted to do to her – what he
would have done this very night…if only. He would lay her out naked on
his bed – licking, sucking and savouring every inch of her golden body.
He would spread her legs and spend an hour between her thighs, exploring
every satiny fold of her succulent quim. Making her come over and over
until she couldn’t take it a moment longer.
“ Mmm – yeah…”
And then - what she would do to him. She would kneel before him and take
his full length in her mouth. Sucking it from the base to the head, then
swirling her tongue around the tip as she pulled it from between her
shiny candy-apple lips. He knew she would do him right – do him so very
well.
“Ah, Love…yeah…”
And finally, what he wanted most – to spread her thighs wide for him and
slide his cock right where it longed to be; buried to the hilt within
her. Spike remembered the way her tight little pussy had clenched his
fingers – so fiery hot and slick with her juices. It didn’t take much to
imagine it sheathed around him now. He knew exactly how it would be,
slamming home inside her, feeling her muscles starting to contract as
her orgasm built. Knowing it was him bringing her this pleasure. Only
him.
A moment: the look in her eyes when he slid another finger inside,
watching her pupils dilate at the sensation.
His mouth full of the taste of her; richer and sweeter than even blood.
Her voice telling him; “ Yeah, Spike…so good. Close…close now…”
“Christ, Buffy – Fuuuuck!”
He roared out his climax, knowing there was no one around to hear it.
Thick milky rivulets hit the back wall of the shower and flowed away
with the water.
“ Oh…fuck…yeah…”
He rasped, starting to come down now. He was still braced against the
wall with one arm, and he leaned into it gasping. God, that was good.
Best wank ever – and no wonder. Anymore UST and a bloke could explode.
Plus he had all that really choice fantasy material now.
*Yeah. Too bad that’s all it’ll ever be, eh?*
He pushed the thought from his mind. He didn’t want to think about that
now. Just wanted to finish his shower and seek the solace of his bed and
the oblivion of sleep.
He prayed he wouldn’t dream tonight. And if he did – that he wouldn’t
remember.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Buffy lay there for a moment, stunned. She tried to let this information
sink in. Just how long had this been going on exactly? Had they been
attracted to each other from the beginning? Just dancing around this
issue the whole time?
* “ You think we’re dancing?”
“ It’s all we’ve ever done.” *
His words came back to her.
“No.”
But it was said quietly and without conviction. She flipped through her
mental catalogue of memories – scenes flashing in her mind. The night
she first met him. Their first fight at the school. Spike at her house –
making a deal with the devil to stop Acathala. Willow’s wedding spell.
*Oh God.*
They’d kissed and groped and made out like they were extras in “ The
Real Cancun”. And when the spell had ended, it wasn’t the horror of
kissing Spike that made her pull away; it was the knowledge that she
didn’t want to stop. How quickly she had stamped that down, burying it
in the deepest part of her subconscious.
*Well so much for THAT, huh?*
Swaggery Spike. Snarkey Spike. Ultra-Violent Spike. They were all there
in her memories, soon to be followed by: Helpless Spike. Romantic Spike.
And always and forever;
Mouthy Spike.
*Don’t forget Sexy Spike and Oh-My-God-Take-Me-Now Spike.*
Bad Buffy Brain piped up. Okay, fine – them too. And a few months ago,
when Riley was sick – Bad Ass Spike showed up for a minute, doing his
level best to get that chip out of his head. And wasn’t that
exhilarating though? Seeing the old Spike for just a moment? God, she’d
been pissed at him. Her sense of betrayal was so great…
*Why was that again?*
It’s not like he didn’t act exactly according to character.
*True.*
She just never expected him to hurt her like that. He went behind her
back; he lied to her and double-crossed her when he was supposed to be
helping her – and in cahoots with Harmony, no less.
*And which one of those things hurt more?*
Oh, but the fight – too sweet and over too soon. When he’d leapt at her,
the shock of his body on top of hers. And the sense memory that took
over when she knew the bite was coming. She shivered involuntarily. When
Angel bit her it gave her the best orgasm of her life.
*Second Best.*
Her mind corrected. Yes, now second to the dream she’d had the other
night.
*Would be third best if only…*
Buffy pushed that thought away quickly. So if Spike had bitten her… she
gulped. It woulda been one HELLUVA way to go out. And she knew he hadn’t
been unaware of that – of what a vampire bite could do…sexually. When he
was on top of her then, she’d felt his erection grinding into her as he
went for the kill. The arousal she’d felt had been so sharp and
immediate that it threw her off her guard, stunning her for a moment.
And that wasn’t the first time was it? How many times had she fought or
argued with him and noticed his hard-on threatening to pop out the
buttons on his 501’s?
*God, did the man ever wear underwear?*
Probably Dozens. Though she’d dismissed it or consciously chosen to
ignore it.
*Damn, Buffy – repressed much?*
So it wasn’t just her.
It was BOTH of them.
Wanting each other.
All this time…
“Fuck.”
** Thanks for the amazing reviews, guys! I'm all a-glow... I*heart* our fandom :D Special thanks to Peta/Megan for the recommendation to BSV and the inspiration to add some bitey goodness to this story (look for it later, o impatient ones). Hope everyone has a stellar Independance day, I'll be thinking of you while I'm lounging idly on the beach...Though how I'll make it for 6 whole days with no Spuffy I have no idea...**
Chapter Eighteen ~ Witchcraft
Summary: Mighty Aphrodite puts the whammy on our heroin...
“ Those fingers in my hair, that sly, come hither stare –
strips my conscious bare – it’s witchcraft.
And I’ve got no defense for it.
That heat is too intense for it.
What good would common sense for it do?
It’s witchcraft. Plain old wicked witchcraft.
And although I know it’s strictly taboo.
When you arouse the need in me, my heart says ‘yes, indeed’ in me –
Proceed with what you’re leading me too.
It’s such an ancient pitch, but one I’d never switch –
Cause there ain’t no nicer witch than you.”
~ Frank Sinatra
Buffy’s mind hurt from so much circular thinking. Even Bad Buffy Brain
had been stunned into silence. Her head ached, her eyes burned and her
stomach was a tangle of anxiety. There was nothing left for her to do
but sleep it off, and hope the morning light would bring some clarity.
She reached over and flicked on her small bedside lamp. Digging in her
nightstand she found the small bottle of Tylenol PM and gratefully
downed 2 tablets with a gulp of bottled water. Hopefully now she could
get a decent night’s rest.
Things always look better in the morning.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The Goddess of Love stood at the foot of Buffy’s bed in all her
enchanted glory. Her son stood by, watching her with awe as she worked
her magic on the fabric of reality itself.
*Sometimes it just pays to bring in an outside contractor.*
He thought with amusement. After all these years he was still learning
from her. It’d barely taken her an hour to come up with a devastating
new plan of action. Aphrodite had taken the time to sit with the girl
and tap into her desires, conscious and unconscious. Very quickly she’d
hit upon the snag that was keeping the lovers apart.
“ She believes she wants a so-called ‘normal life’.”
She announced materializing on the roof of the Summer’s house alongside
Eros. She smoothed her silken robes and patted her flowing hair back
into perfect order. …As if she needed it.
“ I was able to confirm with the Akashik Records. The girl thinks of her
Slayerhood as a burden. She was never trained properly, you see. She
should have been raised with the knowledge of what she was, but she
slipped under the radar of the Watcher’s Council somehow. She didn’t
find out until the age of 16! It came as quite a shock as you can
imagine.”
Eros nodded sympathetically, trying to envision such a destiny suddenly
thrust upon an unsuspecting teenage girl.
“Her Watcher must have had his work cut out for him.”
“ Oh yes, indeed. The upshot of all this is that she wants back the life
she had, thinking it will bring her happiness. That is why she refuses
her vampire suitor and clings to a mortal lover.”
“ She has another lover?” He asked, shocked.
“ Didn’t you do any sort of research? Impetuous child… No matter, you
may have overlooked him anyway. She has little connection with him
beyond her fantasy of a quote ‘normal boyfriend’. And you should have
seen that girl’s heart – such a mess! No wonder the poor dear is
confused. She’s so thoroughly committed to this misguided ideal that
she’s throwing away a chance at real happiness.”
She shook her head sympathetically, a frown upon her rosy lips.
“ And on a side note, our vampire is non-other than the infamous William
the Bloody. Which isn’t helping matters one little bit. However much he
tries to change, she doesn’t trust him, always believing he has ulterior
motives.”
She stood up and began pacing the length of the roof, her flaxen curls
glowing platinum in the moonlight. She turned to him, her perfect brows
drawn together in thought.
“ This is serious business, Eros. Destiny is at work here – their souls
and karma are deeply intertwined. The Powers want them together. They
need each other you see, without their Love for each other they are
lost.”
“ I had no idea what I was getting into, did I?”
Aphrodite smiled indulgently at her errant child.
“ You never do, Cherub.”
“ What will happen if we fail?”
“ We must not. It is Buffy’s Love that drives Spike towards positive
change. At her side he will become a great warrior and serve the White,
ultimately redeeming his own soul. And it is Spike’s Love that will make
Buffy’s life worth living, it will give her something to cherish and
fight for, it will make her the strongest Slayer in all the line.”
“ My Goddess…” Eros exclaimed in awe. And he had thought this a simple
Love Match. Aphrodite nodded at him and then continued;
“ But without Buffy, Spike will fall back into his old ways - and at
best drink himself into a stupor until he is foolishly killed – and at
worst he could give even Angelus a run for his money.”
Eros hissed in shock.
“ It cannot be so – have you not seen his heartfire? It blazes like the
sun, it is what called me here!”
Aphrodite rubbed his arm soothingly and said gently;
“ But it is just that tender heart that makes him vulnerable. It’s what
drew him to an unlife in the first place.” She frowned thoughtfully,
turning away from him to continue her pacing.
“ And as for Buffy, she would remain a strong, capable Slayer – but with
an unfilled heart and an empty life. It would be her undoing. She won’t
last long without the boy.”
“What must we do?”
“ I’ve come up with a plan, Poppet. You’ve heard the expression ‘Careful
what
you wish for?’ …”
He raised an inquisitive eyebrow at her.
“Yes?”
“ The Slayer desires ‘normal’?” Aphrodite’s blue eyes twinkled wickedly.
“Then normal she shall have…”
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The morning light stirred her from a deep and restful sleep. She turned
over into her pillow displacing the heavy masculine arm that was draped
over her protectively. That felt sooo nice, she snuggled happily into
the bare chest in front of her.
*Mmmm, Spike…*
Her sleep-fuddled brain manufactured. She sighed with contentment. All
was right with the world.
*Wait.*
She peeled open one eye carefully.
*Spike?*
Not Spike. Large + Warm = Riley.
*Oh.*
She tried not to feel too disappointed, and looked up to see him smiling
sleepily at her.
“ Good morning, Beautiful.”
She smiled back at him, warming slightly to his sudden appearance.
“ Morning. When did you get here? I didn’t even hear you come in.”
*Must have been the Tylenol PM. Wow, that’s some good stuff.*
“ What are you talking about, Buffy? I was here when we went to bed.
Together.”
“ Oh.”
Buffy was feeling very perplexed at the moment. She pulled back the
blankets and struggled into an upright position. That’s when she noticed
she wasn’t in her own bedroom anymore…
*What the hell?*
She scanned the room quickly, relieved to find she was somewhere
familiar at least.
“ Are you okay, Sweetie?”
Riley asked over his shoulder as he slipped out of bed and began
rummaging around in the drawers of his dresser. He found a pair of green
sweats and slipped them on over his boxers, along with a simple gray
athletic shirt.
“ Yeah, I just thought…”
“ Good.” He said brightly, not noticing he was cutting her off. “ ‘Cause
we don’t want to be late for class.”
“ Oh. Okay.”
She got out of bed and began picking her clothes up off the floor.
“ I’m gonna grab a quick shower then. Meet you at lunch?”
He smiled cheerfully at her and grabbed his towel off the hook on the
closet door.
“ Yeah. Sounds good.”
Buffy finished dressing quickly – in clothes she didn’t remember wearing
last night.
*Cute though.*
At least she could count on her own taste. Riley opened the door, then
turned around and came back to her.
“ I can’t believe I almost forgot – ”
He scooped her up into his arms and kissed her soundly, leaving her
breathless.
“ I never want to leave you without doing that.” He said putting her
feet gently back on the ground, smiling sweetly. “ I always want you to
know how much I love you.”
Her heart melted just a little.
“ How could I not? ”
She said, touched. He grinned boyishly at her and shouldered his towel.
“ I can’t wait for this summer, Buffy.”
“ Me either.”
She replied, trying not to sound as puzzled as she felt. She smiled
brightly at him as he walked towards the door.
“ And, Honey – don’t forget your ring on the night stand again. I just
hate to see you without it.”
He winked then turned down the hall, seeking his morning shower.
*What the hell is going on? Why do I have no idea what he’s talking
about?*
Curiosity piqued, Buffy walked over to the oak night table on her side
of the bed.
There glittering brightly in the early morning sunlight was a gorgeous
diamond solitaire.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
*Holy Crap.*
Buffy could not have been more shocked. This was hers? When did that
happen?
“ Okay. Something seriously screwy is going on.”
She pocketed the ring and headed over to the dorms, hoping to catch
Willow before class.
Ten minutes later she was knocking on the door to Tara and Willow’s
room, anxiously going over the morning’s events in her mind. Tara
answered the door smiling kindly at Buffy.
“ Hi Tara – I was just looking for Willow. I had something I needed to
talk to her about before class.”
She looked politely puzzled.
“ I’m sorry, she isn’t here Buffy. She didn’t come by this morning.”
“ Come by?”
Buffy’s brow wrinkled with confusion.
“ No. I wasn’t expecting to see her till lunch.”
Buffy was crestfallen. She worried at her lower lip, thinking.
“ Oh. Okay. Well, do you know where I might find her?”
Tara looked even more perplexed.
“ Um, your room maybe?”
“ My room?”
*You mean the one I moved out of two months ago…*
“ Are you okay, Buffy?”
She looked genuinely concerned.
*Uh oh, better cover.*
Buffy plastered on a smile and tried to pass it off as a blonde moment.
“ I’m sorry - I spent the night at Riley’s and I didn’t get much sleep…”
Tara pinked slightly at this admission. “ I mean I didn’t sleep well. I
guess I just assumed she would be with you.”
Tara beamed brightly at her, feeling complimented.
“ That’s okay. It’s nice that you would assume that – I guess that makes
us an official couple then.”
Buffy smiled with false cheer, her brain on overload.
“ Yeah. Absolutely it does. I guess I’ll just run over to our room, and
then I think it’s time for some serious coffee.”
The other girl smiled sweetly back at her.
“ Okay, I’ll see you guys at lunch then.”
“ Great. Bye.”
“ Bye, Buffy.”
Tara closed the door gently on a very confused Slayer.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Buffy dashed over to Stevenson Hall as quickly as she could, her mind a
whirl of confusion. Was she dreaming? But everything seemed so real.
Then maybe last night was the dream – that somehow seemed more likely…
Her and Spike, making out? Half naked in the graveyard? That couldn’t be
REAL, right? But then why was it so easy to remember the feel of his
mouth on hers? Or the touch of his hands, cool and commanding on her
body? Buffy felt fractures beginning to develop in her sanity…
*I need to talk to Willow, NOW.*
She knocked lightly on the door to her room, praying feverishly.
*Please, PLEASE be here…*
Willow answered the door, looking surprised to find Buffy on the other
side.
*Thank God!*
“ Buffy? Why’d you knock?”
“ Um, I forgot my key? I’m having a really weird morning, Wil.”
Willow’s face was all concern as she looked at her friend. Buffy was
obviously very upset.
“ What’s going on? Is everything okay?”
Buffy walked into the room she’d moved out of two months ago to find her
belongings magically returned, just as if she’d never left. Somehow she
didn’t think dorm gnomes were responsible. She looked around nervously,
chewing her thumbnail.
“ Yeah, I guess – I don’t know. Do you have time to talk now? I kinda
need you.”
Willow sat down on her own bed across from her, brow furrowed with
alarm.
“ I’ll make time. You look really freaked, Buffy. What’s up? ”
Buffy sat down heavily on her bed, worrying at her nail anxiously.
“ Could you um, tell me about my life? ‘Cause I seem to have completely
forgotten it.”
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
“ What? What’s going on? What do you mean…”
“ I mean I woke up at Riley’s this morning. But I went to bed at MY
house. I have an engagement ring I don’t ever remember getting. I
thought I moved back home two months ago…And I won’t even begin to
describe the events of the last couple of days to you – ‘cause you
wouldn’t believe me. Hell, I don’t even believe me.”
Willow looked dumbfounded. But she immediately rallied like a trooper
for a possible explanation.
“ Do you think it’s some kind of spell? …Or maybe you’re just working
too hard lately?”
Buffy shrugged and threw up her hands in exasperation.
“ I dunno, Wil. But my memories of how things were, like pre-dawn today
– are as vivid and real as sitting here with you right now. I don’t know
WHAT to think! Could a spell do all this?”
“ Mess with your mind? Oh heck yeah. Magic can make you believe anything
– at least for a little while. And you should know, right? Cause of my
whole wacky ‘do my will’ spell. Making you think you were in love with
Spike…”
Willow flicked her wrist in a dismissive gesture, chuckling.
“ Yeah, ridiculous…”
Buffy laughed weakly, a series of images flashing through her mind from
last night – all extremely graphic and painfully real.
*If you only knew…*
“ It might be nothing, Buffy – I mean why would anybody wanna do this to
you anyway?
It doesn’t make any sense.”
“ Maybe just to mess with the Slayer? I dunno…”
Willow looked confused.
“ But how would this affect Faith?”
It was Buffy’s turn to look confused.
“ Huh?!”
Willow’s voice was puzzled.
“ How would you being all wonky in the head affect the Slayer?”
Buffy’s eyebrows met her hairline as she made a sudden mental
connection.
“ Faith’s THE SLAYER?!”
*** Mwahahahahaha - can you believe I left it there? I'm so evil.
*grins* But I promise a nice, juicy udate as soon as I get back (by
Tuesday). Meanwhile, if you're feeling bored over the weekend allow me
to shamelessly plug my other story " Learning Curve" (which you can find
here). It's a short bit of smutty Spuffy fun. I also recommend " And
Here We Go Round Again" by Peta, " Just a Little Spell" by Patti, " One
Perfect Night" by Spikeslovebite, "Roomies" by Brat and if you haven't
read Lizrrrbeathan yet - ya really oughta -
http://www.lizerrrbeathan.com/LizerrrbeathanFanfic.html " Life After
Wartime" will make you laugh AND cry, it's just wonderful. There, that
should get you through the weekend. And if I didn't list your story,
please don't be offended, these are the ones I'm reading currently. It
doesn't mean I don't love ya fer chrissakes! Snuggles to all, Rosie
xoxoxox***
Chapter Nineteen ~ Where Are You Now ?
Summary: Willow has some answers for Buffy...
“ Are you in another place?
Or behind another face?
Where are you now?
Are you just a mental case?
Or did you just slip in to an empty space?
Where are you now? ”
~ Brandy
Buffy’s jaw hung slackly open for a full minute, prompting Willow to
lean over and gently close it.
“ I take it that’s one of those things you don’t remember.”
Buffy got up, pacing anxiously.
“ Uh, yeah. This can’t be a good thing, Wil. I don’t understand anything
that’s going on… Not a year ago Faith stole my body, tried to steal my
life not to mention fucking my boyfriend! And now she’s the Slayer! And
what exactly does that make ME?!”
Her voice rose to a hysterical pitch.
“ Um while I don’t feel at all qualified to address that first part, I
can tell you what it makes you…”
“ In the middle of a psychotic break?”
“Uh, no – not exactly.”
“ On gianormous amounts of LSD?”
Willow rolled her eyes good-naturedly.
“ No, Silly - it makes you retired.”
Buffy thunked down heavily on her bed.
“ What?!”
Willow moved next to her and put a comforting arm around her shoulders.
“ Oh, Sweetie – I don’t know what’s going on, but I promise you we’ll
figure this out.”
Buffy patted her arm gratefully and then rose from the bed again,
pacing.
“ Just tell me how – when?”
Willow looked thoughtful.
“ Well, you started planning it senior year. I remember there was lots
of discussion about everything. I mean it was such a big deal for there
to be two of you in the first place. When you got your SAT scores back,
they were so good – and then you got accepted to Northwestern. Your mom
lobbied really hard of course, and Giles always wants the best for you…”
Buffy nodded absentmindedly remembering how excited her mom had been
about her high SAT scores. She turned to Willow raising an enquiring
eyebrow.
“ And Faith?”
She shrugged offhandedly.
“ She said she didn’t mind, ‘cause she loved the job and you didn’t –
and she was never gonna go to college. She figured being a Slayer was
all she was good for. She was super sweet about the whole thing
actually.”
Buffy crossed her arms, looking deeply skeptical.
“ Really.”
“ Yeah. I kinda think she was happy to be the only Slayer. She really
stepped up to the plate – started training really hard with Giles and -
”
“ Giles is her WATCHER?!”
Her mouth fell open in horror.
“ Well yeah, it only made sense – he had so much experience already. And
that Wesley guy couldn’t really handle her. He kinda pooped out after we
raided the mayor’s office and Faith…hey, do you remember that at all?”
She studied Buffy intently.
“ I remember the mayor’s ascension thingy – big snake and explodey-demon
bits all over the place…”
Her friend cut her off;
“ Oh. Well, that never actually happened …” Willow’s brows drew together
in a contemplative frown. “At least not here…”
She rested her head in her hand, lost in thought.
“ What? What are you thinking?”
Her frowned deepened.
“ I don’t know…it sounds impossible, even for here…but then again…”
Buffy was deeply unnerved.
“ What Willow?!?”
“ It’s just …I’ve been reading something lately.” She crossed the room
to her bed and began shuffling in the drawer of her nightstand. Turning
to Buffy she handed her a book. The title didn’t register mentally at
all ; "Alternate Worlds; Theories in Quantum Physics ”.
“ Is this for your physics class?”
Willow shrugged and gave her a little half-smile.
“ Just a little light bedtime reading.”
“Whoa.”
Buffy was seriously impressed.
“Hey, a girl’s gotta have her hobbies.” She smiled enigmatically before
going on. “ Anyway – this book is all about how there are alternate
Universes that exist right beside our own. Some so close that they’re
almost like a mirror to ours – others so far that we would hardly
recognize them.”
Buffy’s brain strained to absorb this new information.
“ So there’s not just other dimensions, there are alternate UNIVERSES
now?”
“ Yup. Apparently reality is a pretty complex place.” She nodded. “ The
thing is these AU’s - that’s what the book calls ‘em – aren’t separated
by much. According to the author decisions we make can send us into a
different place. But this is the weird part – there aren’t just
alternate Universes, Buffy. There’s alternate US - es.”
Buffy just goggled at the implications.
“ Yeah, I know. It kinda gave me the heebies at first too. Remember
Vampire Willow? Yech.” She shuddered. “ This guy says that on some
level, our souls live out every choice we make. Like it’s part of our
spiritual growth process. All our major life choices create our path,
and with every big life choice our path splits – and a part of us goes
one way, and another part goes the other way. He says you can create
Heaven or Hell on earth depending on your own choices. Makes it pretty
important to stay conscientious huh?”
Buffy frowned.
“ So what are you thinking, Wil?”
“ I’m thinking – and I realize how wacko this sounds – but Hellmouth
right?”
“ Riiight…”
She encouraged.
“ I’m thinking you’re in an alternate Universe. The things you said,
about not remembering getting engaged – and I mean you would NEVER
forget that! And about Faith being bad, and the mayor’s ascension. It
just rang a bell for me and I thought maybe, just maybe it could be
possible.”
They stood in astonished silence together, letting the implications of
this sink in.
“ Buffy – maybe you’re getting a chance to live out a different choice.
That seems like the only way you would remember things being different.
‘Cause according to the book we turn corners into different Universes
every day without ever being aware of it.”
Buffy sat down next to Willow on the bed, stunned.
“ I don’t even know what to say…”
“ I know. Mind-blowing right? Just wait until you get into String
Theory. I’ll lend you ‘The Elegant Universe’ – it’ll fry your synapses.”
“ No thanks, my brain already hurts as it is.”
Willow patted the top of her friend’s head gently.
“ Aw, poor Buffy’s Brain.”
She smiled at the silly gesture and then asked;
“ Could this really be possible, Wil?”
“ Well, Buff – look where we are. I think just about anything is
possible.”
She made a wide arm sweep to indicate Sunnydale, the Hellmouth and
Everything…
Buffy shook her head, trying to make the jumble inside make sense.
Alternate Universes… engagement… retirement…
*Wow.*
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Eros stood awestruck, observing the wonderment Aphrodite had performed.
“ Mother, what have you done?”
She clapped her hands, delighted with her triumph.
“ Oh, Only a small feat…I simply moved her over to the second Universe
to the left. It was nothing really.”
She said, her voice full of artificial modesty. Eros smiled at her
attempt at humility. She never was very good at it.
“ What shall we do now?”
He asked. She smiled brilliantly at him and gave him a wink.
“ Why nothing, Dear Boy – simply sit back and enjoy the show.”
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Buffy sat in brooding silence for several minutes. There was so much to
digest. And she wasn’t sure she entirely believed it…but Hellmouth. That
always made a convincing argument for any kind of weirdness to pop up in
Sunnydale. And the weirdness had been plentiful as of late... She made
up her mind to go with it, and see what they could find out at least.
Stranger things had certainly happened. She smiled gamely at Willow.
“ So Faith huh?”
Willow nodded casually.
“ Yeah.”
“ Crazy Faith?”
That got a smile.
“ Uh huh.”
“ Psycho-killer Faith?”
Willow grinned wider.
“ Well she does go a little nutso on the vamps, but I wouldn’t
necessarily call her a psycho-killer.”
Buffy raised an eyebrow, her tone incredulous.
“ So Faith is good now?”
Willow shrugged noncommittally.
“ Um, as far as I know she was never really bad, Buff. Not here. Faith
is the one that stopped the mayor’s plans before they got too far. With
your help of course…”
She added lamely, seeing the look on her friend’s face. Buffy’s frown
deepened.
“ It’s just that – in my memory – or maybe my world – Faith went really
psycho. She didn’t stop the mayor - she helped him. Right after she
murdered the deputy mayor. Then she poisoned Angel and tried to kill me
and…”
“ God, Buffy – oh no! No wonder you’re so freaked!”
“ Yeah. And it gets worse, Wil. Because of all that, and more…I had to
fight her and I…well I put her in a coma for a really long time.”
Willow breathed in a hiss of shock.
“ Oh my Goddess...”
“ I know. But last year she came out of it, reaaallly pissed off and out
for revenge. She had some kind of device – a magic device, that allowed
her to switch bodies with me.”
Her friend’s eyes went wide.
“ She stole your body, like REALLY stole it? So you weren’t exaggerating
when you said that.”
“ No, I wasn’t. She went nuts. Did all kinds of crazy stuff. She slept
with Riley – in my body. He didn’t know of course. But it hurt so much!
And it took me forever to get over it. Riley and I just got back to
normal not that long ago.”
Willow looked stunned.
“ I don’t even know what to say. I’m kinda amazed you didn’t kill her.”
“ Oh, I wanted to. Believe me. But she ran off – like she does. All the
way to Angel, who protected her – of course.”
“ I can’t believe that! After what she did?”
“ Yeah – he didn’t know at the time and – God, it’s such a long
story...”
Willow’s face reflected her concern, and she asked quietly;
“ Can you tell me what happened? How did it end up?”
“ She turned herself in actually. She did the right thing, and now she’s
doing time there. I don’t know when she gets out – if ever.”
“ Wow.”
“Yeah. Wow.”
“ Well, at least she did the right thing at the end. I know it doesn’t
make up for anything she did to you…”
“It doesn’t, but maybe it will…eventually.” She smiled gently at her,
thoughtful. “ You know, it’s funny. But the Wil I know hates Faith with
a fiery passion, second only to mine.”
Willow smiled back.
“ I didn’t like her much, at first. I felt like she was taking my
friends away. But then she turned out to be so good for you, and then
she kinda just turned out to be good. She’s a great Slayer, Buffy. Not
as good as you, of course.”
She added, patting Buffy’s knee reassuringly.
“ Yeah. Of course.”
She said not really believing it.
“ But she’s done a lot of good in the world. Averted 3 apocalypses –
apocali?” Willow pondered. “ Giles says she’s really coming along.”
“That’s great I guess.” Buffy said half-heartedly, and then asked, “
She’s a good Slayer?”
“ Yeah.”
“ And she’s a good…person now?”
“ Uh huh.”
“Wow.”
Buffy got off the bed, pacing again. She felt dizzy from trying to keep
up with the changes. Everything was so different. And the possibility
that she was in an alternate Universe? She didn’t even know what to do
with that information. A thought occurred to her and she stopped,
turning to where her friend sat on the bed.
“ Am I happy, Wil? I mean here, in general?”
She smiled brightly in response.
“ You really are, Buffy. You said it was what you always wanted – to go
to school and have a normal life. Be a regular girl. And you’re doing
really good here. Your grades are great, and you’re so happy with
Riley…”
“ Yeah, what about that? When did we get engaged? I mean we are right?”
“ Oh yeah! It was so sweet! He made such a big deal out of the proposal
– I got to help plan.” She said grinning conspiratorially. “ He took you
on this little tour of all the places that were special to you guys –
you know like the lecture hall that he was your TA in, the quad that you
had your first picnic on – ending in the school bookstore, where you
first met. He told you that he had never been so happy to have a
concussion in his life – cause that’s how he met you.”
“ The whole dropping books on his head thing.”
Willow nodded, beaming.
“ Yeah. Then he broke out roses and champagne and popped the question.”
“ Did I say yes right away?”
“Yup – that minute – or so ya told me.”
“ Wow.”
“ Plus he made this big deal about planning the wedding for the summer
so he could take you on a big long honeymoon. You’ll be gone for like 2
months.”
“Wow.” She repeated, her mind starting to short-circuit. She sat down
again, rubbing her forehead, trying to fend off an impending headache.
Something important came to mind.
“ Have I met his parents yet?”
“ Yep. Nice, down to earth types.”
She worried her bottom lip nervously.
“ Do they like me?”
Willow nodded, reassuring;
“ They love you, Buffy. They already refer to you as their daughter and
everything.”
“I’m running out of ‘Wows’ here…”
Willow put her arm around Buffy for reassurance.
“ I know it’s gotta be a shock. I can’t even imagine it myself. But
we’ll get the gang on it and we’ll figure it out. You know we will.”
Buffy smiled weakly.
“ Yeah. I guess so. We always do.”
“ Let’s call Giles right now, okay?”
“ Okay. I’m sure I’ll feel better just hearing him say something Giles-ish.”
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
“Dear Lord, Buffy – an Alternate Universe, are you sure?”
“ Kinda?”
“ Oh Dear.”
Buffy and Willow exchanged a smile.
“See I told ya.”
She whispered to her friend, cupping her hand over the receiver.
“ What’s that?”
“ Nothing, just talking to Willow.”
“ Well, you two should come in straight away. I’ll call Xander and Faith
and have them meet you here.”
“ Of course, Giles. And thank you.”
She said, sincerely grateful. He seemed momentarily stunned. When had
Buffy ever said thank you for anything?
“ You’re welcome. Of course.”
He said kindly. Buffy smiled with relief. Giles was on it - they would
figure it out. They always did.
“ We’ll be there as soon as we can.”
She hung up the phone.
“ Looks like it’s Scooby time again.”
Willow raised an eyebrow and put on a stuffy English-accent for Buffy’s
benefit;
“Indeed.”
It was the first real smile she’d seen from her friend all day.
** Was it good for you? More to come this week. My beta is working on
the new chapters as we speak... Missed you too by the way. I was in
massive Spuffy withdrawls all weekend. *Must. Aquire. Laptop.* Have a
great week - expect more Thursday-ish xoxoxox Rosie**
** Since you've been oh-so-patient and have flattered me with all those
yummy reviews, here's a brand new chappie...**
Chapter Twenty ~ Across the Universe
“ Sounds of laughter, shades of life are ringing
through my open ears inciting and inviting me.
Limitless undying love which shines around me
like a million suns and calls me on and on
across the universe…
Nothing’s gonna change my world… ”
~ the Beatles
Buffy wasn’t sure what to expect at the Magic Box now. Alternate
Universes?
* Alternate Xanders?!*
That gave her brain a spin. She was deeply relieved to find the same old
bright blue building standing exactly where she’d left it 24 hours ago.
She followed Willow through the front door and was greeted by the
familiar scents of herbs and incense.
*So far, so good.*
There was Xander, looking…Xanderish, talking to Anya at the counter.
They turned to smile at her as she came in. Nice and normal. Giles
seemed his usual tweedy self, mulling over the day’s receipts and
drinking tea. She patted Xander’s back affectionately as she walked by.
The mushy love-vibe between him and Anya was almost palpable. She felt a
momentary pang; her and Riley didn’t seem to share much of that these
days.
*No, just you and -*
She cut the thought off abruptly, focusing on settling herself in at the
large round table designated for research. It was piled high with books
and manuscripts already. This seemed to be heading in the direction of
an all-nighter… Oh, well – at least she could look forward to coffee and
doughnuts later. Plus lots of mid-researchy chitchat. She smiled happily
to herself and rummaged for a pen and notebook in her bag. The ringing
of the small brass bell over the door startled her. Who could that be?
Everyone was here already…
*Oh yeah. Faith. Act natural - keep stake handy.*
“ What’s up all?”
She sauntered in casually, tight jeans and a white tank top showing off
her well-sculpted body. Buffy felt self-consciously thin and frail by
comparison.
*Just remember you can kick her ass.*
She reassured herself, giving her a faux smile. She wasn’t sure if she
should be comforted that Faith still looked the same or not. Faith
pulled out a chair from the table, straddling it and resting her arms
along the back.
“ So what’s the 411, people? Giles didn’t say much on the phone.”
Just then the doorbell sounded again, and everyone turned to look. Dawn
straggled in, gasping. She grinned insolently at Faith between pants.
“ Told ya you couldn’t ditch me.”
Buffy had never been so glad to see her sister in her life. It felt like
weeks since she’d last laid eyes on her. She got out of her seat to
greet her and pulled her into a tight hug.
“ Dawnie! I’m so happy to see you.”
Dawn hugged her back looking puzzled.
“ But I just saw you last - ”
“I know, I know – I’ll explain later.”
Was it her imagination or did Dawn’s hair look browner somehow. More
chocolatey. She tucked a smooth strand behind her sister’s ear gently.
“ What’d you do to your hair, Dawnie? It looks darker…”
Dawn touched her long hair self-consciously.
“ What? Nothing. I got it cut…” She eyed Buffy warily. “ Are you okay?
Cause you seem kinda weird today.’
“ Yeah, I guess. It’s been a weird kinda day.”
They walked back to the table together to sit down. Dawn situated
herself between Buffy and Faith, dropping her backpack with a noisy
thud. This drew a glare from both Slayers. Dawn balked at the double
stare-down thrown her way.
“ Okay, okay. Sorry! Jeeze.”
Faith seemed to relent a little and leaned forward to talk to the
younger girl.
“ So how’d yer day go, Squirt?”
“Ah, it was okay. Same stuff as usual.”
“ Long as you went. More than I did when I was your age.”
“ Yeah, yeah, yeah. Can I please get another
Faith-as-juvenile-delinquent story to keep me on the straight and
narrow?”
Buffy was surprised that Faith would bother with her sister. She’d never
noticed her taking an interest before. Maybe AU Faith really was
good…maybe.
“ Hey, don’t be such a smart-ass. I just want ya to learn from my
mistakes is all.”
Buffy smiled approvingly, warming ever so slightly to this new Faith and
her seemingly un-evil intentions.
“ Yeah, Dawnie – you should listen to her. I think it’s nice that Faith
wants to be a good influence on you. Lord knows you won’t let me be
one.”
Dawn shot her a curious look.
“ Yeah, Kiddo. Listen up, I’m chock full a wisdom.”
Faith ruffled Dawn’s perfect hair playfully. The girl batted her hand
away and patted it back into place irritably.
“ Hey! I did not spend an hour with a flat iron just for you to mess it
up again.”
Faith shrugged amiably, smiling.
“ Dunno why you don’t like it curly anyway. Look at mine – it looks
hot.”
There was something oddly familiar about this conversation.
“ Ever occur to you I don’t wanna look like you, Doof?”
*That’s funny they sound just like me and -*
“ Hey now, total babe over here. You oughta be happy we share any genes
at all, Kid.”
All the color drained out of Buffy’s face.
Dawn rolled her eyes insolently.
“ Oh whatever. You are so full of yourself.”
But she grinned when she said it. Just like she always did when she
mouthed off to her sister.
“ You know I’m right though.” Faith said poking at her playfully. “ You
know you can’t wait to grow up so you can be just like your big sis.”
It felt like a mule-kick in the gut. Buffy felt all the air drain out of
her lungs.
Dawn squealed and giggled at the tickling she was getting.
“ Oh right. As if!”
A dreadful sick feeling crept in.
“ Be nice, Kiddo – or I’ll tell everyone about how you used ta strip off
all your clothes and run stark freakin’ naked all over the
neighborhood.”
Dawn’s voice went up an octave in her outrage;
“ Hey, I was two then!”
“ See that just proves my point ‘bout your genes – ya come by it
honestly.”
Faith shot her sister a bawdy wink. Dawn giggled and poked her back,
smiling.
“ Well, you might have a point there. But at least I didn’t get your
skanky taste in clothes.”
Her older sister’s eyebrows shot up at the jab.
“ Whoa! Harsh words from the gromit. I’m so gettin’ you for that one
later.”
Dawn dismissed her with a wave of her hand.
“ I know, I know. When I least expect it… can we get on with the
research already?”
Faith ruffled her hair again for good measure and turned to look at
Giles who was watching the scene with amusement.
“ So anyone gonna tell me what’s goin’ on? Or do I have to wait for the
apocalypse ta actually go down?”
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Buffy took the first available opportunity to pull Willow into the
training room alone.
“ Oh my God, Wil! Dawn is Faith’s sister? FAITH'S ?!!!”
Her voice was tinged with hysteria. Willow looked completely nonplussed.
“ What? Whaddaya mean? Of course Faith is …” Willow’s eyes grew wide
when comprehension hit. “ Because you never retired in the other
Universe…you were the only one. And the monks choose the Slayer to be
her protector.” She gasped. “ My God, Buffy… Dawn is YOUR sister there.”
Buffy nodded, holding back the tears threatening to spill.
“ Those monks made her out of me, Wil. And I’ve been loving her and
protecting her from Glory and…”
She broke down, finally. The stress of it all was too much. She felt
like straight-up crazy was right around the corner. Tears streamed down
her face as she thought about her sister. So many memories, manufactured
or not, they felt real. Dawn was like a part of her. There was no one
she was closer to. And if she wasn’t her sister anymore… Buffy couldn’t
finish the thought, she could only cry harder.
Willow wrapped her arms comfortingly around her friend, her mind
boggling at all the implications. Every time she thought she understood
the way the Universe worked, things just got weirder. She patted Buffy’s
shoulders soothingly, making little shushing sounds.
“ Oh, Sweetie – I’m so sorry. It didn’t even occur to me that this could
happen. I mean this concept is still kinda new to me. I still don’t know
if Vampire Willow is an AU me, or just a by-product of Anya’s magick
or... I mean I couldn’t’ve made choices THAT bad, right?”
Buffy was too lost in her own misery to hear, she continued snuffling
into her friend’s shoulder.
“ But focusing! The good news is that this almost proves my theory,
Buffy. You have to come from an alternate Universe…things just don’t add
up otherwise. So now we know, right?”
She rubbed her arms reassuringly trying to cheer her friend up a little.
“I guess so.” Buffy said sniffling. “I just wanna go back, Wil. Words
cannot express the extreme wrongness of this place for me.”
Willow nodded sympathetically.
“ Of course you do. And we will figure this out. I promise…” She
frowned, worrying – then she added softly;
“ I just don’t know how yet.”
** OMG! Can you believe I just did that? But wait, there's more...Mwahahahaha.
It's only gonna get crazier from here, Kids. *rubs hands together
evilly* Stay tuned true believers - more to come by Monday xoxoxoxox
Rosie the Riveter (get it? 'cause I'm so *riveting* lol - I crack myself
up...)
**Thanks for being patient, in reward here's a brand spankin' new
chapter just for you...enjoy!**
Chapter Twenty One ~ No Such Thing
“ I wanna run through the halls of my high school.
I wanna scream at the top of my lungs.
I just found out there’s no such thing as the real world, Just a lie
you’ve got to rise above.”
~ John Mayer
After she cried herself out, she calmed down a little. She felt horrible
– confused, angry and desperate. How could this place be real? How could
such things be happening? She needed information, she needed action.
Sitting and waiting had never been her thing. She had to do something,
anything. Buffy got up from the gym mat she’d been hunkered on and began
pacing.
“ You have to tell me everything, Wil! I can’t take another surprise
like that. I need to know about EVERYONE now.” Willow nodded, her eyes
following Buffy back and forth across the training room.
“Okay, of course. What do you want to know?”
She stopped and looked at her, face a mask of fear.
“ What about my mom – is she… sick here? Oh my god is she DEAD?”
Her eyes went round and wide like a panicky horse. Willow rushed to her
side.
“ No, Buffy – no! She’s fine.” She soothed. “ She was sick - a tumor.
That’s why you didn’t end up at Northwestern. You wanted to be here for
her. But she’s getting better now, Buffy. She’s okay. Everything’s
okay.”
“ Is it?” She said doubtfully. “ ‘Cause I’m almost afraid to ask about
Angel…”
Was he permanently Angelus here? Was he dead? Or worse yet, would she
have to kill him again? The thought made her already tense stomach
tighten into a clenched fist.
Willow chewed her bottom lip considering, wondering what she could say
that wouldn’t upset her further.
“ Well… you broke up at the end of senior year. He wanted you to have a
normal life…”
Buffy interrupted her;
“ That happened in my world too.” She frowned thoughtfully. “Maybe it
was just destiny…”
“ Maybe it was then.” Willow said gently. “You took it really hard, but
you finally got through it. Angel went off to L.A. to fight the good
fight. I hear Wesley – that other Watcher guy, joined his team. There
were times I thought you were gonna get back together… But it never
happened. Then you met Riley. You could tell it hurt him, but Angel was
happy for you – he wanted you to have a normal life so much.”
Buffy‘s smile was bittersweet.
“ Yeah, he did.”
*Too bad it doesn’t seem to be working out that way…like at all.*
“Tell me something else…Like; were there any other guys here?”
She pushed on, wanting to change the subject to something less painful.
Willow thought for a moment.
“Oh! You almost hooked up with this complete Mr. Wrong in disguise. But
you managed to stop it before it went too far. We found out later he was
a total womanizing man-whore.”
*Uh oh. I know this one…*
“ Parker Abrams?”
Buffy asked sheepishly.
“Yeah, exactly. Did that happen there too?”
She turned towards the window unable to meet her friend’s eyes.
“ Well, sort of. Only I didn’t stop it before it was too late…”
Willow looked horrified and stood to face her.
“ Oh, Buffy – oh no! Did you? Did he? I mean did you guys…?”
Buffy blushed uncomfortably.
“ Um. Yeah. Soon to be followed by the inevitable guilt and
repercussions of sleeping with a total womanizing-man whore.”
Willow rubbed her shoulder sympathetically.
“ Aw, Sweetie. I’m sorry. You seem okay though. Are you okay?”
Buffy shrugged.
“ Pretty much. I mean I met Riley afterwards and he was great. Is great,
I mean.”
She covered quickly.
Riley was a touchy subject right now. Here they were engaged, but there?
Lately it felt like they were drifting further and further apart
everyday. And that was before Spike jumped into her (pants) problems.
“ Yeah, he really is.”
Willow smiled brightly.
*Time for another change of conversation here…*
“ Maybe we should go back in now? Try to figure this whole thing out?”
She moved toward the door. Willow nodded agreeably.
“ Yeah – if anyone will have some insight, it’s Giles.”
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
“ I’m sorry, Buffy – I don’t have any insight into this at the moment.
I’ve heard of alternate dimensions, alternate realities – some very well
documented. But an alternate Universe falls into the realm of physics
I’m afraid – and therefore outside my area of expertise.”
He ran his fingers through his hair, sighing in frustration.
“ Actually, Giles – it sorta falls into the area of meta-physics which
kinda brings it back into ours. Here, I brought some books with me…”
Willow rummaged through her backpack and handed Giles several books. He
shuffled through them, looking exceedingly skeptical.
“ Are we even certain that this is what’s happened here? ” He turned to
Buffy “ You didn’t bump your head or...”
He trailed off when Buffy shot him a look of supreme annoyance.
“ No Giles. This is not ‘All My Children’. I don’t have amnesia - or an
illegitimate love child with my former stepbrother. Sorry to
disappoint.”
Xander smirked at that, but kept his peace while Willow ran
interference. All the in-fighting made her anxious.
“ I know it’s not amnesia, Giles. She doesn’t exhibit any of the signs.
She remembers things fine, she just remembers them differently. That’s
what got me thinking about alternate Universes.”
Faith raised a curious eyebrow.
“ Like what kinda differences, B?”
Buffy and Willow exchanged a furtive glance. Certain things would upset
Faith. A lot.
“ Well, like I’m not engaged to Riley there. Oh – plus I moved out of
the dorms almost two months ago and back home.”
Dawn looked at her, slightly stunned.
“ Crazy. No wonder you were actin’ freaky earlier.”
She said sympathetically. Buffy felt an enormous pang just looking at
her.
*She still feels like my sister.*
“ So what’re we supposed ta do about it?”
Faith asked flippantly.
“ Well, the first step will be research of course - ”
Giles started. She cut him off, rising from the table.
“ That’s all I needed to hear. I’m out. Lemme know when you got
somethin’ for me ta kill. Best thing I can do right now is patrol.”
Dawn gathered her things, looking apologetic.
“ Sorry, Buffy. Let me know if there’s anything I can do.”
She hugged her warmly before following dutifully behind her sister.
“ Later, B. Bye all. Gimme a call if you get any info.”
Buffy’s eyes followed Faith enviously out the door. She itched to join
her, to REPLACE her. To lose herself in the immediacy of an all out
fight, finding the answers she sought in fists and blood. But she was
stripped of her right to it here - how she hated that. It made her feel
soft and weak and powerless. Just another helpless human waiting to
become a victim. Not a feeling she wanted to get used to. She took a
deep breath to steady herself. She only had to do this for a few days,
tops. …Right?
“ Goodnight, Faith.”
Giles said quietly.
The door closed with a jingle of the small brass bell.
Xander looked up from his comfortable sprawl at the research table.
“ Good to know you can count on Faith when the chips are down.”
Willow scowled at him.
“ Xander, you know she’s never been good at the research stuff.”
He moved his feet off the table and leaned forward.
“ Yeah, well she doesn’t even try, Wil. It’s like she thinks she’s above
it all or something.”
“ Above US, you mean.”
Anya threw in her two cents and sat down next to her fiancé.
“ Exactly.”
He nodded patting her thigh. Willow frowned at them.
“ She’s doing a good job. We should cut her a break. Not everyone can be
Buffy ya know.”
Xander looked across the table at the girl in question, considering her
thoughtfully.
“ No. They really can’t.”
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Hours later the doughnuts were gone and the coffee reservoirs depleted –
but they’d learned little more than they started with. Willow sighed
with frustration and closed her book.
“ This isn’t going anywhere, Giles. I think I need to get on the
Internet and research.”
Giles removed his glasses and rubbed the bridge of his nose wearily.
“ Certainly. Perhaps we should call it a night then. Let me know what
you find out tomorrow.”
Willow and Buffy began packing up their things. Buffy felt a surge of
affectionate gratitude for her little homemade family.
*Thank god I have them here.*
“ Thanks, guys. I know this isn’t end-of-the-world stuff exactly.”
“ Of course, Buffster. What else would I do with my Friday night?”
Xander patted her arm affectionately, and then steered Anya out the door
quickly before she could say anything HE might regret.
“ Call me when ya need me.”
He called over his shoulder on the way out the door. Buffy and Willow
exchanged amused smiles. Willow shouldered her backpack and headed for
the door.
“ Walkin’ home with me, Buff?”
“ Yeah. Just a sec, ‘ kay?”
There was something she had to do first. She found Giles behind the
counter with a copy of Gryffindor’s Compendium flipping through the
section on trans-dimensional journeys. He sighed tiredly and sipped at
the tea in his favorite green porcelain mug.
“ Still nothing, I’m afraid. But we will keep trying.”
His voice was reassuring to Buffy’s ears.
“ It’s okay, Giles. I know we’ll figure it out.”
He smiled kindly at her, exhaustion written clearly in the deep lines of
his face.
“ Giles…I…”
Buffy twisted her fingers together anxiously; this kind of thing didn’t
come naturally to her. But with all that had happened, she didn’t want
to miss out on another opportunity. If anything, this whole experience
was showing her what she really had – and how easily it could all
disappear.
“…I just wanted to say – thanks. Thank you for doing this for me. I know
I’m not a Slayer here anymore - ”
“ Nonsense. You’ll always be a Slayer, Buffy. It’s who you are.”
She beamed at him, taking his compliment deeply to heart - then kissed
his cheek sweetly.
“ I just want you to know that I appreciate it. You’re always so good to
me.”
“ It’s my pleasure, really. It’s been wonderful to see you. Your absence
has been… well; I’d say it’s been deeply felt. By all of us.”
“ I’ll just have to come around more often then.”
He smiled warmly at her, touched. He’d forgotten how dear she could be.
“ Goodnight, Giles.”
“ Goodnight.”
She grabbed her bag from the table and followed Willow out of the Magic
Box, locking the door behind her.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Willow and Buffy walked back to the campus in companionable silence,
their brains working overtime trying to process all the events of the
day. Willow’s mind whirred away at light-speed running calculations and
cross-referencing them with teleportation spells and quantum theory.
*I wonder if I should try to get a hold of D. Adams’ “ Theories on
Pan-Universal Travel”?*
And her brain was off and running again.
Buffy mulled over the events of the last 24 hours. She’d gained and lost
an entire life literally overnight. Here she was in a different Universe
now (!???) with a new life, no sister, no job, a new fiancé, but the
same parents, the same friends and ________ her synapses blew. She just
couldn’t comprehend it all. It was too much. She’d dealt with strange
stuff before; giant demons, vampires, cults, and lately an actual Hell
god, but nothing like this. Traveling to a different Universe? What the
fuck?!
*Next thing you know they’ll be bringing me back from the dead.*
She thought irritably. Why were the Powers screwing with her? She did
her job, she did it well. What else did they want with her? She’d
already given up a normal life to be the Slayer. She’d lost Angel; her
mother was sick, now they’d taken Dawn from her. All she had left were
Giles, her friends and Spike.
*Whoa! Spike? How’d he make that list?*
And more importantly why didn’t Riley?
*It was just off the top of my head. It didn’t mean anything.*
I mean she was engaged wasn’t she? …Except she wasn’t. In her world
Riley was nowhere near proposing. In fact, things weren’t going that
great lately.
*Not since Spike started hanging around so much.*
She thought crossly. And there he was again. In her thoughts, in her
life, in her dreams…
*I’m afflicted with Bubonic Spike.*
That made her smile. He was a pesty little plague wasn’t he? Always at
her door, wanting to patrol, at Scooby meetings wanting to help.
Everywhere she went, you would find him. He was kinda
*Stalkerish?*
No… dedicated. And last night left no doubt as to the reason why. He was
in love with her.
*Spike is in love with me.*
She waited for the inevitable feeling of horror to set in.
…
…..
……… *Hey, where’s the horror? *
It wasn’t there. She only felt strangely comforted. Spike was out there
somewhere loving her. And if he could, he would help her, or die trying.
She knew that instinctively.
*Maybe I should try to find him here….?*
Not for anything funny – no sex. No sir. Just so he could help.
Absolutely. She didn’t miss him or anything. She didn’t need him. He
could be useful is all. Besides the chances that AU Spike loved her were
*Pretty good actually.*
All things being equal in Spike Land… Not that it mattered. Not that she
cared one way or another. Nope. She just needed all the help she could
get right now. Maybe she’d just go look him up later. Maybe tonight… She
interrupted Willow’s musings.
“So how about Spike? Is he still around somewhere?”
She tried to sound casual. She was just politely curious of course. No
harm in asking, right?
*Right!*
Her mind agreed all too eagerly.
“ Well yeah. Of course. Or not of course, I guess. Cause you don’t have
Faith there so…Hmmm… Is he still with Harmony, Oo! Or Drusilla?”
Willow puzzled. Buffy frowned, curious at where this was heading.
“ Um, no – neither. He was with Harmony awhile back but he ditched her a
little while ago for…nobody.”
Buffy cut her slip of the tongue off lamely. But Willow didn’t seem to
notice.
“Huh. That’s interesting. Is your Spike good now? Or mostly good?”
Buffy shrugged, smiling.
“ Kinda, mostly. Yeah. The Initiative put a chip in his head and now- ”
Willow cut her off;
“He doesn’t hunt or kill anything except demons.”
Buffy nodded, not entirely surprised to find Spike the same in this
world.
“ Right. Exactly.”
*I wonder if we ever got together here…*
She thought idly – her mind turning inexorably towards their last night
together.
“ Only it wasn’t the chip that really changed him here.”
Willow continued.
“No?”
Buffy asked only mildly curious, her mind preoccupied with images of
Spike as he knelt before her. Spike as he slid his fingers inside her.
Spike when she held his hardened cock in her hands. She felt a hot flush
creep up the back of her neck and spread to her face and chest.
Willow shook her head, smiling wonderingly. As if she still couldn’t
believe it herself.
“ Uh-uh. It was Faith.”
** Thank you for the many wonderful reviews you left. You guys rock!
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** Yer not gonna like it...**
Chapter Twenty Two ~ How Long Has This Been Goin’ On?
“ I could cry salty tears –
Where have I been all these years?
Little wow, tell me now –
How long has this been goin’ on? ”
~ Peggy Lee
Buffy’s heart skipped a beat.
*And the cataclysmic shocks just keep on coming…*
“ Faith as in Crazy Faith? Faith changed him?”
*Hold on, that doesn’t mean they’re together…*
“ Well… yeah, at least from what I can tell. It’s not like Spike’s Mr.
Forthcoming, all makin’ with the info. I just kinda figured it out for
myself. At first, we didn’t know what his dealy was. He just started
pitching in, helping out. He went on patrol with you guys a bunch. Then
just with Faith after you retired. He kept getting better and better.
Doing more good. And then I started noticin’ the sparks flyin’- ”
“There were sparks?”
Buffy asked weakly. Willow nodded, smiling.
“ Yeah, big crazy ones. And before ya knew it they made the hook up.”
Unfortunately she could picture just exactly what kind of hook up all
too well. That ill feeling started creeping back into her stomach again.
“ Wasn’t Xander mad? He hates Spike.”
She asked anxiously, picturing the worrying damage Xander would no doubt
try to inflict.
“ He was kinda. At first. But then he said if anyone could handle Spike
it was Faith.”
Willow shook her head, smiling. “ They just sorta made sense together.
So now they patrol every night and they’ve been dating for months now.
Which has got to be some kinda record for Faith.”
Her nausea grew exponentially.
“ Is… is Spike happy do you think?”
She asked tentatively, afraid of what the answer might be.
“ I dunno – is Spike ever happy? He’s less evil…”
Willow shrugged non-comittally.
“Oh. Well that’s good I guess.”
Willow failed to notice the crestfallen look on her friend’s face.
“ Yeah – I think they help keep each other out of trouble in a way.
Gives ‘em a vent for all that excess energy.”
Buffy got an instant and seriously unwanted visual of Faith and Spike
doing exactly that.
*Is that what we’re calling it now?*
“ You okay, Buff? You look kinda green around the gills there.”
“ Sure. I’m fine. It’s just hard trying to keep up with the changes
here.”
She covered, with an artificial smile.
“ Oh. Well sure. Funny, even the little differences huh?” Willow shook
her head wonderingly. “ Like I know you’re Buffy. You feel like Buffy to
me, you know?”
“ Yeah. I do.”
Buffy smiled back at her, genuinely this time.
“ But you’re not. You don’t belong here – it hurts you to be here. And
my Buffy is… I don’t know where. The older I get, the less it seems like
I know.”
It was good to be reminded that this was not her world, not her life
(not her Spike!). And if she had her way, it never would be…
“ The Universe just keeps on with the wacky, huh?”
“ Yeah.”
They walked along quietly for a while, amazed at the circumstances that
would bring their two worlds together. Buffy thought of her mother ill
at home. Would she get well too? Did she need her there now? And what
about Dawn - vulnerable to attack without her to protect her? And
finally her own Spike alone in his crypt back home. Was he lonely? Would
he miss her? Would he understand if she didn’t come back? Or would other
Buffy be there to comfort him?
*And why doesn’t that make me feel better? Like at all…*
But other Buffy was engaged so she’d probably seek out Riley first.
*Oh shit – Riley!*
Somehow she’d managed to forget him - again. What was wrong with her?
She had this great boyfriend who loved her and wanted to make her happy,
but somehow he kept slipping her mind. It was just the circumstances –
all the weird stuff she was dealing with. That had to be it. It made
perfect sense really. Except for one little thing – she’d never managed
to forget Spike. Not for a second, not for a moment. In fact hadn’t her
very waking thought been
*Spike.*
She’d mistaken Riley for him for just an instant. She’d thought it was
his arms she was waking up in. And she’d been pretty damn happy about
it. Buffy felt a deep surge of guilt. She was hands down the world’s A
#1 WORSTgirlfriend. Not to mention what happened in the cemetery the
other night… She blushed at the thought.
*And again I ask myself ; “What the hell is wrong with you?”*
She’d been neglecting him all day too. Missed their lunch date and never
even called.
*Bad, bad Buffy …*
She scolded herself. She probably should go see him, try to make it up
to him. Smooth things over, if only for other Buffy’s sake. She didn’t
want to be the one to ruin her engagement. After all she hoped to return
to her own world soon.
*Please God.*
She prayed fervently. Every moment she was here seemed to bring a new
and awful revelation. She was almost afraid of what she might see next.
Buffy desperately needed some time alone to think things through. Life
was confusing even before she made her sudden departure. As if it wasn’t
bad enough to be having weird feelings for Spike – not to mention one
seriously naughty encounter. It was hard to disentangle that from her
already strained relationship with Riley. Add on the problems and
implications of traveling to an alternate Universe and you had some
severe brain-fry. Buffy really needed a time out.
“ Hey, Wil? I don’t want you to feel like I’m ditching you or anything
but I really need some time to clear my head.”
Willow looked at her kindly.
“ Of course, Sweetie. Who can blame ya?”
“ I think I’m gonna take a walk then. Try to locate a little Zen. After
that I should probably go see Riley. I ditched him for lunch already
today and it’s giving me a bad case of the guilts. Even if he’s not my
Riley, I still feel for him, ya know?”
Willow nodded sympathetically.
“ I understand. Are you gonna tell him about all this?”
“ I don’t know, Wil. I can hardly handle it myself. And Riley’s not that
good with stuff like this. He likes his Universe nice and orderly. I
think it might just hurt him. He’d have all kinds of questions. He might
wonder why we aren’t engaged over there – and have doubts and…I think it
would just mess things up.”
“ I can see how it could. Totally. Maybe you better not then - at least
for now. With any luck we’ll have you back in your own place in just a
few days and Riley will never even have to know.”
She smiled winningly at Buffy who crossed her fingers and replied;
“ Here’s hoping.”
“ Call me if you need anything, ‘ kay? I’ll be at Tara’s or in the
library makin’ with the research. ”
“ Thanks, Wil.”
She smiled at Willow and hugged her warmly, feeling supremely blessed to
have her as a best friend. If anything, this whole experience was
showing Buffy how lucky she was. She never realized how much she had to
be grateful for. She had a loving mother, a wonderful sister and amazing
friends. Everywhere she turned in her life there was love. And yet she’d
spent the better part of the last four years bitching and complaining
about – well, everything.
*Guess I’m a glass half-empty kinda gal.*
She thought walking off towards Riley’s. Buffy couldn’t begin to count
the number of times she’d wished to not be the Slayer - she’d hoped,
she’d cried, she’d prayed. She’d spent so much time hating her life and
wanting something different that she’d never bothered to notice what she
got in return. If she’d never been the Slayer she never would have met
Willow, Xander or Giles. She would never have loved Angel, or had those
sweet memories of their relationship. And in spite of the pain she’d
experienced, she wouldn’t trade it in. She smiled warmly thinking of
him. This last year he’d really become a good friend to her and she was
thankful for that.
The love they once shared seemed to transform itself into a solid
friendship. She was glad that they could both move on with their lives
now. A part of her would probably always love him; he was her first real
love, first sex, first heartbreak. How could she ever forget that? But
now she was content to let it melt into a warm glow of nostalgia, think
of him fondly and wish him well. It would be nice to think he might find
someone too and be… well – as happy as he could be.
Just as she intended to be. It was becoming pretty clear that life is
brutally short - you have to grab happiness with both hands while you
can.(And where have I heard that before?) She was realizing how quickly
everything could be taken away from her. Buffy was so tired of being
miserable and mopey. The life she’d spent so much time complaining about
had been yanked right out from under her and now she felt like she’d do
anything to get it back.
She could hardly believe she’d lost Dawn like that. Her mind was nowhere
near accepting that she was Faith’s sister now. There was yet another
gift being Chosen had brought her. It was hard to adjust at first, Dawn
seemed like such a total pain in her ass. Always underfoot and in the
way - kinda like a brand new puppy. But now, she was a part of her and
Buffy felt her love growing for her sister every day. She had never felt
so fiercely protective of another person before.
What was she thinking when she retired? How could she just walk away
like that? Buffy knew she didn’t have the whole picture yet – but she
definitely got the sense that other Buffy didn’t see the gang that much
anymore. Giles had even said how much they all missed her. Thank God she
still had Willow, but how could she let everyone else just drift? How
could she not see Giles?! He was like a father to her, more so than her
own dad had ever been. And Xander was her best male friend, and
practically a brother.
She walked along, deep in thought - pondering the mysteries of AU
Buffy’s decisions. Here she was smack in the middle of the life of her
supposed dreams. Just your everyday college girl with a nice-guy fiancé
and no more worries than her GPA and where to have her wedding. Normal
as normal could be.
Had she really wanted this?
She’d been retired less than a day and was already hating it. It made
her feel all useless and stripped of power. She didn’t know how other
Buffy could stand it. And letting Faith take over – of all people. She
shook her head in disbelief. What a crazy existence it was that such
things could happen. Events could line up just so to make her life turn
out completely different. What was that saying? The one her mom always
used…Oh yeah;
"Careful what you wish for – you just might get it."
And that could not be truer in this case could it? Her whole life had
become unrecognizable to her. And this so could’ve been her - really
her. She clearly remembered the scenario Willow had described. There had
been talk about Faith taking over and her retiring to get an education.
It almost happened. Almost. Before Faith decide to take a spin on the
dark side that is.
*Guess I don’t have to ask “what if” anymore, huh?*
And she was freakin’ engaged! To Riley! I mean it was all well and good
to date him, he was a wonderful boyfriend (mostly). He was good and
sweet and kind to her - and Buffy really appreciated the sense of
stability and normalcy he’d brought to her life. But MARRIAGE?! As in
FOREVER? Whoa. There was no way she was ready for that. Especially with
him. She was starting to realize that they’d been having some serious
problems for awhile now. He always seemed worried and fearful and would
never tell her what was wrong unless she dragged it out of him. Then
there was the whole lack of sex issue lately – and hello, nineteen here!
Not quite in need of Viagra yet.
*At least I’m not.*
She thought irritably. And what was his problem anyway? He hardly seemed
to want to anymore. And when they did – well, let’s just say waking the
neighbors was never an issue. She was kinda bored actually… But maybe
she was being unfair, maybe she wasn’t giving him a real chance. Things
were kinda crazy lately. Even before this whole alternative Universe
mess. Mom was sick and Glory was after Dawn. Maybe if she paid a little
more attention to him and their relationship things would be alright.
*Hey, it could happen.*
Her shoulders sagged under the weight of it all. There was so much to
deal with at the moment and she felt downright exhausted. What she
really needed was a decent night’s sleep. Maybe Willow would have some
news for her tomorrow. Then she could get out of this crazy place and
get down to the business of straightening up the mess her actual life
was in.
*Let other Buffy deal with her own problems!*
All she had to do was try not to mess anything up here until she made it
back home.
Buffy thought she’d never be so happy to see her own little Hellmouth
and screwed up version of Sunnydale again.
*God yes! Just give me back my life again!*
Just one little thing left to do. Gotta smooth things out with Riley.
She sighed wearily and squared her shoulders preparing to do her
girlfriendly duty.
** Okay, okay - calm down already. It's just a plot device! If there was
no bad guy and no obstacles it wouldn't be much of a story now would it?
Take a deep breathe and relax. I promised you a happy ending, didn't I?
*smooch* xoxoxoxox Rosie**
** You'll be happy to know this chapter is completely Spaith free. (But
I make no apologies for the Biley) Relax, it's relatively minor. Now,
let the Riley bashing begin ...**
Chapter Twenty Three ~ Good Morning, Heartache
“ Good Morning, Heartache, you old gloomy sight.
Good Morning, Heartache.
Thought we said goodbye last night.
I turned and tossed until it seemed you had gone – but here you are with
the dawn.
Wish I’d forget you – but you’re here to stay.
It seems I met you when my love went away.
Now every day I start by saying to you :
Good Morning, Heartache – what’s new?”
~ Billie Holiday
Riley looked up at her from his place on the bed. Various books and
papers scattered around him as he studied. He smiled at her adoringly.
“ Hey, Beautiful. I missed you at lunch today.”
“ Yeah. Sorry about that - I had some stuff I had to take care of.
School stuff.”
She covered ineptly. He didn’t seem to notice.
“ That’s alright, Honey. Glad you got some good things done. Besides,
after this summer we’ll have our whole lives to spend together. I think
I can spare you for a lunch or two.”
Buffy tried very hard to smile sincerely. Since when had smiling at her
boyfriend become an issue? He was so kind and well meaning and…she just
didn’t have the heart for it right now. She felt like life had given her
the big smack down – like WWF style. She was totally drained emotionally
and physically. Even dealing with an alternate Riley seemed like too
much to bear at the moment.
She was relieved when he didn’t try to talk to her about anything. Or
touch her beyond a soft kiss on the cheek. He seemed happy to just be in
her presence. It made her feel wretchedly guilty. When did he get this
far away from her? It seemed like not that long ago they were so close.
Couldn’t wait to see each other, to be together. But lately they rarely
spent time with each other. And when was the last time they had sex? Two
weeks ago? Three?
She felt like it was all her fault. She’d been neglecting him lately,
she knew it. Just pile on another whopping dose of guilt, thank you very
much. And then there was the added pressure to not screw up other
Buffy’s life. If AU Buffy was ready to get married who was she to ruin
it for her? So when Riley offered to take her to dinner, she just
couldn’t bring herself to say no.
She owed them both it seemed.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
An hour later they sat across from each other at a small table at
Pannevino, the nicest Italian restaurant in Sunnydale. It was situated
on a hillside overlooking the city, giving a lovely view of the
twinkling lights below. Buffy wished she could appreciate it more, but
the sumptuous surroundings just seemed ostentatious instead of elegant.
That reaction was reinforced when she looked at the prices on the menu.
You could easily spend $100 here on wine and appetizers alone.
“Um, Riley? Are you sure we can afford this?”
She asked cautiously.
“ Of course. Nothing’s too good for my girl.” He dismissed jovially. “
Besides I got a huge severance package from the Initiative.”
“ What do you mean?”
“ Well after we stopped Adam, they shifted the operation over to simply
seek and destroy. Didn’t I tell you about this already?”
“Remind me.”
Riley shrugged.
“ They wanted to make me head of the entire unit. But with you retiring,
I just couldn’t see continuing with that lifestyle.” He seemed to
shudder visibly. “ And have I told you lately how glad I am that you’re
done with all that?”
He took her hand and kissed it gently.
“ You deserve so much more than that, Buffy. You deserve an amazing life
– and that’s exactly what I’m going to give you.”
Buffy plastered on a smile for his benefit, feeling the walls closing in
around her. She tried to catch her breath while Riley ordered their
dinner. Fifty dollars worth of pasta – soup and salad not included. She
was deeply unimpressed. Buffy would’ve much rather gone to a little
local place with great atmosphere and wonderful food – at half the
price. Some over-priced chain with locations in Las Vegas, San Diego and
LA had nothing on Paesano’s around the corner as far as she was
concerned. But try telling Riley that. Try telling Riley anything for
that matter. He did nothing but talk all night.
He told her all about their future – how they were moving to Iowa and in
with his parents to save money after graduation. Then Riley would join
his grandfather in the family business in Iowa City. They’d be happy and
buy a house. Buffy would never have to work of course. She’d stay home
and raise the kids and “make a nice home” for them. He ran on and on
about every detail of their lives practically up to retirement. Buffy
wondered if her alternate self was really and truly happy with this.
‘Cause she had only been doing it for all of one night and already she
wanted to brain him with the empty wine bottle. Nothing permanent – just
get him to shut up for five minutes.
Would dinner never end?!
Finally the check came. She gladly skipped the tempting looking
cheesecake in favor of a quick exit. She made an excuse about homework
to avoid spending the night and left him in his car with a quick peck on
the lips. She’d never been so relieved to see the backend of a date in
her life. The whole night felt like long, slow suffocation - and Riley
was the pillow over her face. Damn could the man talk! And talk and talk
and talk. She’d hardly gotten a dozen words in the entire evening.
Though in a way, that was a relief. At least she hadn’t been forced to
lie about anything. She’d just smiled and nodded her way through dinner.
She was really beginning to feel sorry for other Buffy. Did the girl
have any idea the life of stultifying boredom she was in for?
And what about her? Was this who her Riley really was? Had she been
blind all this time? Never noticing how controlling he was? How wrapped
up in himself and his own ideas about everything? Is this the life she
was in for if she stayed on this path? The thought made her shudder. But
how could she tell? AU Buffy made decisions she thought she wouldn’t
make…
Buffy shook her head as she unlocked her door. Thank God this wasn’t her
real life, she wasn’t the one stuck here. …Or was she? It had been a
whole day already and she showed no signs of exiting this crazy place so
far. Giles and Willow had vague ideas but no solutions. She couldn’t
help wondering if this was going to be a permanent placement. Buffy
sighed heavily and flopped down on her bed. Kicking off her strappy high
heels she lay back pondering.
She was absolutely exhausted, quickly becoming too tired to think
anymore. Didn’t look like she’d need any Tylenol PM tonight.
*Thank God - look what happened last time!*
Although, it would be nice if she woke up back in her own world
tomorrow… But that would be just too easy wouldn’t it? And these things
never had easy solutions. Sometimes it seemed like she spent the entire
school year fighting evil beasties and thwarting apocali. The only time
things ever seemed to slow down was during the summer.
*Ugh! Enough thinking. Sleep now.*
She was almost past the point of coherent thought. Buffy had just enough
energy left to locate her yummy sushi pajamas and brush her teeth before
bed. She did a quick run through of her evening beauty rituals and
crawled into the comfort of her bed with profound gratitude.
All she wanted now was eight full hours of lovely, dreamless sleep.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Eros and Aphrodite stood solemnly at the foot of Buffy’s bed. What a day
it had been – the things he’d seen! They had followed the Slayer from
morning till night. He was amazed at his mother’s abilities – he’d
learned much today at her side.
“ What next, Mother?”
The goddess looked thoughtfully at the sleeping girl in front of her.
“ She’s vulnerable right now, open to suggestion. This is a fine time
for dream work, I’d say.”
“ Another dream? But I sent her one already – a glimpse.” He hung his
head sadly. “ It failed.”
“ Not a glimpse of what could be – but a look into her future is what’s
warranted. Let her see where this path will take her. ” Aphrodite
frowned, thunder gathering on her clear brow. “ Let her see where her
damnable stubbornness leads.”
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Buffy moaned low in her throat and rolled over in her sleep. A series of
images ran through her brain; there was Tara with half her mind gone,
Glory torturing Spike, Giles oozing blood from an awful wound, Dawn
kidnapped…and all their running in vain.
“ No!…”
She called out futilely – but the images didn’t stop.
A tower teetered in the distance, a rickety skeleton of found materials
that reached bleakly into the sky. Her sense of dread and fear was
overpowering – but she could do nothing. It played out like a horror
movie in front of her, one she couldn’t walk out on.
The battle waged, she fought and bled – struggling with Glory up and
down the unsteady structure only to end it on the ground. She beat the
god down into submission, punishing her with a deadly war hammer.
Triumph! She was defeated at long last! It would all be alright…it was
alright. Tears of relief slipped down her sleeping cheeks. Glory was
beaten, the war was over – it was over and Dawn was…
*No!*
A man was with her, a sinister figure in black with a knife in his hand.
*Spike! Thank God, Spike…*
It would be okay, Spike was with her and he promised - he promised ‘til
the end of the world’…
But it wasn’t okay. Spike was losing this fight. She watched him plummet
through the black night, duster flapping in the wind as he fell to the
deadly cement beneath them.
She cried her terror into her pillow. Was he dead? Shattered and ruined
on the ground below? Was this the final thing that ended him? It
couldn’t be, she couldn’t lose him, not now… But he wasn’t moving, and
she couldn’t see – couldn’t will her dream self closer to look in on
him. She was stuck on the tower with Dawn and the man in black.
Muffled sobs filled the night in her otherwise silent dorm room.
The shining blade was raised and poised with care at her sister’s
abdomen. With artistry he began to carve into the girl in front of him.
“ Shallow cuts…” he said quietly. “ Shallow cuts… let the blood flow
free.”
And then she was there, her physical self. Dawn cried out to her;
“ Buffy!”
It could still turn out right – all might yet be well. The man in black
followed Spike to the ground, screaming. Buffy took the briefest second
to enjoy the deep sense of satisfaction his death brought her. It was
alright, Dawn was safe – they made it. She helped the bleeding girl away
from the precarious edge she’d been bound to. It was all going to be
fine… She had Dawn and Spike just had to be okay. She couldn’t lose him
now. She WOULDN'T.
She sighed and turned over, tugging her blanket with her.
The night crackled with blue-white energy and blinding light behind
them. The world screamed as the walls between dimensions came crashing
down. Lightning cut the night as the earth trembled and split. A deadly,
medieval looking dragon winged through the air from a fissure in the
shattered sky above them.
It was too late. The ritual had begun.
She watched helplessly as the Universe literally unraveled around her.
Buffy moaned in her sleep and twisted fretfully in her nest of blankets.
She saw, but could not stop the coming apocalypse. She felt her twin
self’s resolve – saw her kiss Dawn goodbye. She turned to face the
rising sun with a look of determined grace. Buffy screamed in horror as
she watched herself dive into the chaotic mass of ultra-violet energy in
the sky.
Her body became a lightning rod, absorbing the thunderbolts that once
attacked the fabric of reality. She trembled and shook with the force of
it, spasmed as if in the midst of electroshock – then at last was still.
The dimensional gates closed, shrinking in on themselves to nothing as
her lifeless body fell to the ground.
Buffy wept in her sleep, helpless to do more.
The sun rose fully in the sky, gently lighting her dead form. She saw
the tears on her friend’s faces, on her sister’s. And at last she saw
Spike, crouching near her and somehow more broken from her death than
his own fall from impossible heights. Sobs wracked his body as he broke
down and cried out the loss of her. She heard him weeping her name…
“ Buffy…Buffy…God, no…”
The scene changed to full daylight – a pretty, grassy place full of
flowers. A lovely weeping willow tree hung over a rock maybe? What was
that? In the dappled shade she could almost see… the branches parted to
show her a speckled gray slab of marble. She recognized the shape of a
headstone immediately. The inscription at last became clear;
Buffy Anne Summers
1981 to 2001
Beloved Sister
Devoted Friend
She saved the world a lot.
She sat bolt upright in her bed heart lodged in her throat with her
strangled scream, tears running unchecked down her face. That was the
worst nightmare she’d ever had. But it was more than a nightmare – she
felt the weight of foresight settle on her shoulders.
“ No.”
But she could not deny the reality of the images that filled her mind.
They were too visceral, too painful.
*Prophecy.*
She buried her face in her hands and cried.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Buffy waited until the sun peeped through the blinds to call Giles.
She’d spent the rest of the night wide-eyed with misery caught somewhere
between tears and terror. Was this really what was going to happen? Was
this unavoidably her destiny? She thought back to the prophetic dreams
she’d had of the Master. She’d dreamed her death then too, and look how
THAT turned out.
She put on a brave front for Giles, but even over the phone he could
sense her distress. Thank God he was an early riser – he was already
drinking his morning tea when her call came. Buffy hadn’t wanted him to
go to so much trouble but he insisted on coming to get her. In
retrospect she was glad, the last thing she wanted in the world was to
be alone right now. Giles’ fatherly presence would bring her comfort and
some much-needed stability. But she found herself thinking of someone
else she wanted more. Some one she could be herself with, someone who
would see through all of her defenses to the weepy chicken within. He
might tease her a little, but just so she’d smile. He had that funny way
of disarming her and putting her at ease at the same time.
*God, Spike where are you?*
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
She had just enough time for a quick shower and fresh clothes before
Giles came knocking. Buffy felt slightly calmer, but the vivid images
from her dream haunted her. Pain, chaos, destruction, death… Spike in
broken pieces on the ground. Dawn’s blood running in gory rivulets down
her body. The dreary gray finality of her own gravestone. Buffy
shuddered involuntarily, feeling suddenly sick and shivery. Her
Watcher’s brow furrowed with concern.
“ Buffy, are you quite alright?”
“No.”
She replied miserably.
“ Tell me what I can do for you.”
He sat on the bed beside her and gently stroked her back, soothing her.
She’d given him a brief sketch of her dream on the phone. But what was
worrying him now was the pale cast of her complexion and the sick fear
that showed plainly in her eyes. He frowned with worry. The poor girl
had been through so much already.
*Far too much for one so young.*
Buffy shook her head in the negative.
“ I don’t know, Giles. I don’t know what anyone can do…” She paused and
chewed her thumbnail fretfully. “ What if there’s nothing to be done and
I…” she swallowed.
And this time it would be the real deal, a permanent time out in the
pine penalty box. Game over and no extra plays. She’d seen her own
headstone fer chrissakes! Buffy shivered again and pulled her soft pink
cardigan more tightly around her shoulders. Giles patted her soothingly.
“ We mustn’t jump to conclusions, Buffy. We don’t know what your dream
meant. It -”
She cut him off.
“ I do. I know exactly what it meant.”
She rose from the bed to stare out the window desolately.
“ It means I’m going to die.”
** Oooo! Was that angst-a-licious or what? More to come by Friday ...
I'd like to promise it sooner, but I'm still in recovery from the SD
Comic Con last weekend. My mind's all a-whirl... Joss says Hi by the
way...xoxoxox Rosie **
** This is how much I love you; I drag myself from my sick bed just
to update for you. And I'm feeling spectacularly crapturous today.
(which is like craptastic, only more so). So here's a brand spankin' new
chappie just for you. Are you feelin' the love yet? *Snuffly smooches*
Rosie xoxoxox
PS - Beware the Spaithness. It's particularly vile this chapter. (Now
you can't say I didn't warn ya) ;p **
Chapter Twenty Four ~ Ruler of My Heart
“ Ruler of my heart, father of my soul – where can you be?
I wait patiently. My heart cries out, pain inside.
Where can you be? I wait patiently.
When you’re alone, the goin’ gets rough.
Come back, come back, come back – I’ve had enough.
Make me a queen, happy again. Hear my cry, please, my king.”
~ Lisa Fischer
It was a solemn group that gathered at the Magic Box that morning. So
very different from the laughing friends that sat at that same table the
day before. Xander took one look at her drawn face and gathered her into
his arms. He hugged her tight and rested his cheek on the glossy crown
of her hair, protective as any brother could ever be.
“ It’ll be alright, Buff. I promise.”
He kissed her softly on the top of her head before letting her go.
Willow took her hand and sat next to her at the overloaded table.
“ We’ll fix this, Buffy. You know we will. We won’t let anything happen
to you.”
She said it with all the comforting reassurance she could muster. Buffy
tried hard to smile back at her friend. But deep inside she felt the
cold fingers of death already reaching for her. Is this what she came
here for? To die? She squeezed Willow’s hand briefly before letting it
go, but couldn’t meet her eyes. Buffy found herself longing for her
mother, just to hear her voice… But talk about complications. There was
no way she could see her mom in this state, not without spilling her
guts like the scared little girl she felt like inside. Bringing this
Joyce a whole boat load of worry and fear she didn’t need during her
recovery. Taking a deep breath she willed herself to stay calm. There
was work to do.
*And a Slayer’s job is never done. Not until SHE is anyway.*
She thought morosely. Pushing the bad thoughts away from her, she looked
up at Giles expectantly.
“ So where do we start?”
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
This was one of the most exhausting afternoons ever. Buffy felt totally
drained of all energy and motivation. All she wanted now was to climb
into her narrow dorm bed and cry herself to sleep. But there was still
so much to do. Between her prophecy dream and forays into alternate
Universes the research seemed endless. Willow had theories, Giles had
probabilities – but no one seemed to have any answers. At 5 o’clock she
couldn’t take it anymore, she just needed out of here for a while. She
excused herself for a coffee run and nobody asked any questions.
It was so good to be outside, to feel free for a little while. She
closed her eyes and breathed in the crisp scent of the evening air,
beginning to relax just the tiniest bit. Buffy strolled downtown taking
in the seemingly familiar sites. It was getting harder and harder to
believe that this wasn’t really her home, her world. She was already
starting to forget the little differences. Like was the coffee place
always the Espresso Station? Wasn’t it something else? She honestly
couldn’t remember. She pulled the gang’s drink order from her pocket,
looking it over.
*Latte for Will. Red Eye for Anya. Hot Chocolate for Xander.*
She couldn’t help smiling a little at that one.
*Same Old Xand.*
Maybe she should pick up something besides doughnuts while she was out.
She rounded a corner past the theater lost in thought and almost ran
into someone.
“Spike!”
She said, startled.
*Shit!*
She was so not prepared for this. I mean she knew he was around, had
been kinda wanting to seek him out actually. But now that he’d
materialized in front of her she was lost. What would he say to her?
What would she say to HIM?!
“ Buffy.”
He said, perfectly indifferent. Not Slayer, she noted – just Buffy.
“ W-What are you doing here?”
She managed to stammer out. He looked her over coolly, the very picture
of nonchalance.
“Just waiting for the Slayer to show up.”
It was truly stunning how much that upset her.
*The Slayer?!?*
“ Why?” She snarked, covering her hurt. “ Got a hot date?”
He quirked an eyebrow at her, his jaw tightening imperceptibly.
“As a matter of fact. Yeah.”
He turned and smiled with pleasure, but not at her. Faith sauntered up
casually, a lurid picture in black leather. She was wearing tight
leather pants, a slinky red shirt that looked painted on, a studded belt
and high-heeled biker boots. The girl looked like a walking felony.
*Just what Spike would go for.*
She thought irritably.
“ Hey, Baby.”
Faith purred, shooting Spike a saucy smile and launching herself into
his arms. He grinned wolfishly.
“ There’s my girl.”
He wrapped his arms around the Slayer and kissed her deeply. Buffy could
only stand and gawk as her brain completely flat lined. When they
finally came up for air, Faith turned to smile at her.
“ Oh, Hey B. How ya doin’?”
Buffy searched for the appropriate answer among her frozen synapses.
“ Fine.”
Faith nodded agreeably, seemingly unaware of her predicament.
“ Cool. Any breakthroughs on that whole AU sitch?”
Buffy shook her head numbly.
“ No, not yet.”
“ That’s too bad.”
Faith leaned back into Spike comfortably.
“ Yeah.”
Buffy could only stare in horrified fascination at the scene before her,
almost frozen with shock. It was one thing to hear about something
terrible, but another thing all together to actually WITNESS it. It was
like a car crash - she couldn’t look away.
“ So, how’s your boy?”
Faith asked casually. Spike looked bored and studied his nails, one arm
still wrapped protectively around her waist. Buffy wanted to slap his
hand away, but shoved her own hands deeply into her pockets instead.
*Not my Spike.*
She reminded herself, trying to stay steady.
“ He’s fine.”
Faith wrapped her arm around Spike’s neck, nuzzling.
“ Sweet. We should hang out soon. Go dancin’ or somethin’ - talk about
the old times.”
*Oh, and wouldn’t THAT just be a hoot?*
“Yeah.”
Spike’s boredom seemed to have reached a breaking point.
“ I hate to bust up the party, Pet – but we really should be goin’.”
He untangled himself from her arms and moved to walk away, patting her
rump affectionately.
“ Yeah, we should. Sorry, B. Can’t keep the vamps waitin’. ”
Spike reached back for Faith’s hand without looking, as if he simply
expected it to be there.
Somehow this was one of the most devastating things Buffy had seen in
the past two days.
“ Sure.”
She said limply.
“ Catch ya later though?”
Faith grabbed Spike’s hand which he took hold of instantly,
possessively. It made her stomach hurt.
“ Yeah.”
Faith waved as they walked away, holding hands like the lovers they
were.
“ Great, B. Take it easy. Call me if ya get any info.”
Spike never turned around once. And she realized that this was the least
amount of words they had exchanged. Ever. He hardly seemed to register
her presence at all in fact.
“ Sure. Bye.”
She said quietly, feeling sick.
And she stood there watching as what used to be her life walked away.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Buffy stared after them until they had long faded from her view.
Standing alone in the spotlight of a streetlamp she felt the tears
overflow and simply surrendered. There was no way she could hope to
contain them at this point. There was too much hurt - too much fear and
confusion to hold back. Her chin started to wobble and she turned from
the light to find some semblance of privacy. If she was going to have a
breakdown she didn’t want to do it in the street.
Ducking into the alleyway beside the Espresso Station she turned her
face to the rough stone wall and cried. She wept out her confusion at
being cast into this crazy world where NOTHING was right. She sobbed
over the loss of her sister and of Spike – who knows if she’d ever get
them back? And she needed them both so much. She’d been rocked by the
unexpected loss of her sister. And she’d never felt more bereft in her
life than the moment Spike walked away with Faith.
She felt so alone right now, so terribly alone. She knew she still had
the Scoobies, her Mom and Giles, but the people that she felt the
closest to were out of her reach - maybe forever. And that was only the
beginning of this nightmare. As if it weren’t enough to be cast away
into Bizarro World - DEATH was breathing down her neck now. The real
kind you didn’t come back from. She was staring down the barrel of the
big dirt nap - and that scared her more than she could even put into
words.
Spike once told her that she was just a little bit in love with death,
that it was part of being a Slayer. Maybe that was true, sometimes she
felt drawn to a darkness that seemed to call her name. And at times the
burdens of her work felt like too much to bear. But now that she was
faced with it, it was the LAST thing in the world she wanted. There was
still so much life ahead of her! She didn’t want to miss a moment of it
– she wanted to spend more time with Mom, help her get well again. She
wanted to see Dawn grow up, to find out what genius career Willow ended
up in, and play Auntie to Anya and Xander’s kids… God, how could she
miss all that? Her breath hitched as her tears began to dry up little by
little.
And then there was Spike. HER Spike was waiting for her, and there was
definitely something between them. He’d been irritatingly right again.
That thought made her smile. He was an annoyingly perceptive little
bastard, wasn’t he? She never realized how much she relied on him until
recently – how much she needed him. Now that he was effectively gone she
couldn’t deny it. What she wouldn’t give to just talk to him… He had a
way of making everything alright. He always reassured her with out
making her feel weak, and if he were here right now he’d be doing
everything in his power to help her. She found that comforting. Maybe
her Spike was in their world doing just that. If he knew she was missing
he’d do whatever he had to to bring her back. Buffy smiled again, a
little steadier this time. He loved her. Her smile widened. And
she…well, she somethinged him. Maybe not love…
*Not yet at least.*
But something.
** Now that wasn't so bad was it? It's all part of my sinister plan, my
evil has a purpose, you know. Have a little...trust. ;) You're going to
luuuuvv the next chapter. Out next week. I'm going to crawl back in my
bed and die till then. *hack* *weeze**cough* **
**C'mon get happy, people - It's the end of the angst! (Or at least a
reprieve...) Here's a bright, cheery little chapter just for you. Snappy
dialogue and delightful Riley bashing coming your way...enjoy!**
Chapter Twenty Five ~ A Fine Romance
“ A fine romance with no kisses. A fine romance, my friend this is.
We should be like a couple of hot tomatoes.
But you’re as cold as yesterday’s mashed potatoes.
A fine romance, you won’t nestle.
A fine romance, you won’t wrestle.
I might as well play bridge with my old maiden aunts.
I haven’t got a chance, this is a fine romance.”
~ Ella Fitzgerald
Buffy dried her eyes on the sleeve of her jacket and smoothed out her
hair, calming down now. She snuffled away the last of her tears and
straightened her clothes - preparing to fill their orders and get back
to the Magic Box. There was still work to do, and she wasn’t about to
give up. Not when she had so much to lose. Dawn and Spike belonged to
her and she was damn well going to fight for them. There had to be a way
to get her back home and defeat Glory that didn’t end in her death.
Feeling better and freshly determined she stepped from the shadow of the
alley and into the warmth of the small café. It was bright and cheery
inside bolstering her mood even more. It only took a minute to place
their drink order and she filled her wait time with a thorough
examination of the glass pastry case. Buffy had just added on some
turtle brownies, lemon bars and biscotti when she was startled by a
heavy tap on the shoulder.
She spun around to see the lunk towering over her.
“Riley!”
“ Hi, Honey.” He smiled brightly at her, obviously pleased to see her.
She wished she could say the same. Pulling her in for a hug he said, “
It’s great to see you.”
*And my night just keeps getting better and better.*
She plastered on a fake smile for his benefit.
“ You too.”
“ What’re you doing here? I thought you were busy tonight.”
He asked, looking puzzled.
“ Oh, I am. Just gettin’ some coffee, taking a little break.”
She replied quickly.
“ Big study session?”
“ Yeah-huh. The biggest.”
Buffy nodded vigorously. The clerk called out for a pick-up of her order
and Riley eyed the multiple coffee drinks and large bag of goodies
suspiciously.
“ That can’t be for just you and Willow…”
Buffy looked down at the drink carrier and paper sack in her hands and
laughed nervously.
“ Oh no, of course not. It’s for…for…” her brain refused to work for a
moment – then aha!
“ For our study group. For History class. We’ve got a project due you
know.” Could she improvise or what?
“ Oh, well – of course.” He smiled with apparent relief. And somehow she
just knew what he was thinking – he was afraid she was doing late night
research with the gang. And he didn’t want his sweet little fiancée
involved with that anymore did he? An angry spurt of resentment surged
into her belly. “ Glad you’re being so studious and taking your grades
seriously this semester.” He added.
Had he always sounded this condescending? How had she missed that
exactly? Buffy stifled the urge to shove a biscotti where it would do
the most good and smiled winningly at him instead.
“ Thanks for your support, Sweetie. But I really have to be getting back
now. Looks like an all-nighter.”
She tried to look apologetic. Riley appeared somewhat stunned by her
dazzling display of teeth. Well, she had given him her famous1000
kilowatt no-boy-can-resist-it smile.
*I am so good.*
Buffy thought smugly. She planted a quick peck on his cheek and headed
towards the door.
“ I’ll call you later though,’kay?”
“ O-okay, Buffy. Goodnight then.”
“ “Night!”
She called over her shoulder waving cheerily. And she rounded the corner
and headed back to the shop as quickly as she could, considering the
whole thing a VERY near miss. She settled out of her brisk trot into a
steady walk and began to breathe normally again. It was getting harder
and harder to talk to Riley these days. She wanted to blame it on this
whole alternate Universe mess but she knew it started long before that.
They’d been having problems for months now. The worst thing was that
they never talked about it. He wouldn’t open up to her unless she broke
him down with relentless questioning. She had to drag anything she
wanted to know out of him kicking and screaming. It was becoming obvious
that he didn’t trust her, and never had. Thinking back she could see how
he questioned her and her motives over and over. It was also becoming
clear how seriously insecure he was – he doubted her love and commitment
from almost the beginning.
Look at how he’d responded to her relationship with Angel – and to Angel
himself for that matter. (Not that Angel had handled that whole mess any
better.) And then there was how he reacted to Spike – could he possibly
be more aggressive? Jeeze! She could chalk it up to some subconscious
sense of their mutual (ahem) attraction, but she really thought it was
more than that. She rooted around in the bag for a cookie and then
munched on it thoughtfully as she walked.
The truth was that Riley lived in a black and white world. Spike was a
demon, Angel was a demon and demons = evil in Riley Land. End of
discussion. (And how many times had she heard that little expression?!)
Buffy rolled her eyes with annoyance. Riley’d said that to her at least
a hundred times – anytime he didn’t want to talk anymore. So pretty much
every time they talked about anything real or important. He said it so
much you’d think it was the latest catch phrase sweeping the nation. She
sighed with frustration and crunched down on her chocolate chip
biscotti.
He was annoyingly narrow-minded. And it wasn’t just about demons.
Everything seemed to fit into his black and white worldview. And talk
about controlling! He had her entire life planned out here – and her own
Riley was no better. How many times had he told her what to do, or what
she needed? How many times had he preached to her about right and wrong?
Ethics? Manners?
“Arg!”
The truth was staring her right in the face. He really was Captain
America. (Thanks, Spike). And she was damn sick of it. It was like he
was born into the wrong era. He shoulda been a G-Man in the 50’s. Hell,
he was thisclose to McCarthy era politics anyway. Before you know it
he’ll be spoutin’ off about commies and building a bomb shelter. That
made her giggle.
*Hey, I actually learned something in History class! Go, Buffy!*
Wouldn’t Willow be proud? Buffy smiled brightly, feeling pleased with
herself. But then she remembered the train of thought that led her here.
*Bleah. Riley.*
Where was she again? Oh yes, sick to death of his crap. His
narrow-minded, preachy, condescending, self-righteous, shutdown,
insecure CRAP. He’d finally worn her down, she’d had enough.
Honestly, if this is normal?
Who needs it?!!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
She walked back into the Magic Box in a much better mood than she’d left
it.
“ Who has a sweet tooth?” she called cheerily “ I come bearing
chocolatey goodness.”
She set her haul down on the research table smiling. Xander dove into
the large paper sack greedily.
“ Ooo, chocolate chip cookie-things.”
He dug one out of the bag and began munching away.
“ They’re biscotti, you heathen.”
Buffy said, raising an eyebrow at him.
“ All I know is they make my mouth happy.”
He smiled back at her beatifically. Willow snagged a rich looking
brownie dripping with caramel.
“ You got brownies?!” she exclaimed with glee. “I vote we send Buffy on
ALL the snack runs.”
Xander looked offended.
“ Hey! I am the Snack Master here, there shall be no other.”
Buffy patted his shoulder in consolation.
“ Don’t worry, Xand. I wasn’t gonna quit my day job to become ‘Buffy the
Munchie Slayer’.”
He ducked his head in a dignified manner.
“Good. As long as we’re clear.”
Buffy pulled up a chair next to Willow and pulled her mochaccino out of
the carrier.
“ So, any new developments?”
She asked, barely daring to hope.
“ Actually there was something…” Willow looked down at her notes briefly
then back up at Buffy.“ Did you say that Faith never appeared in your
dream?”
The Slayer nodded.
“ That’s right.”
Willow frowned, contemplating the paper in front of her.
“ And Dawnie did?”
That faint hope was growing now in Buffy’s chest.
“ Yes.”
Willow nodded and flipped through the pages of the yellow legal pad she
was holding.
“ Did you get any sense of her actually being your sister? Like did you
notice her hair? You said her hair was different here…”
Buffy’s eyes went wide as understanding struck her.
“ Oh my God – I was back there...” she gasped covering her mouth with
her hand.
“ In my dream – I was home.”
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
“ That’s what we’re thinking, yeah. I went over my notes a few times and
it’s the only thing that makes sense – based on the information you gave
us.”
Willow chewed thoughtfully on her pencil and began flipping through the
pages of her legal pad again, scowling. Buffy felt like jumping for joy.
*Finally a freakin’ break!*
“ Why aren’t you more excited about this? Guys, come on!” She was
practically bouncing in her chair. Oh, to be home again! To see Mom, to
hug Dawn and to… something Spike. She grinned at the thought. Nothing
would make her happier right now.
“ Well, I’d like to be – but we still have no idea how you get there.
Heck, we don’t even know how ya got HERE. And I’ve just about exhausted
the resources I have, there’s still no answers and it’s not like Giles
is being any help…” Willow frowned petulantly.
“ I heard that. I am right in the room you know.” Giles looked up at her
from his spot by the register. Willow shot him an apologetic smile.
“ I’m sorry, Giles, I’m just frustrated. This is the craziest thing
we’ve ever come up against.”
“ And that’s saying something.” Xander interjected.
“Indeed.” Giles began polishing his glasses as if on cue, stepping out
from behind the counter. “ And I’m afraid my books aren’t of any use in
this case. Everything I have references inter-dimensional travel at
most.”
“ So we can send you into a wacky Hell dimension.” Xander smiled at
Buffy winningly, aiming for good humor.
“ Or the world without shrimp.” Anya piped up.
“ But not home.” Willow said quietly. “ I’m sorry, Buffy. We just don’t
know anything yet.” She gave her friend a regretful look then began
flipping through the books in front of her once more. “ Magic maybe? Or
the going to the Watcher’s Council?” Seeing Buffy’s horrified expression
she backtracked. “ Or not. No Watcher’s Council. Bad, bad idea. I just
don’t want you to be stuck here – and we’re running out of options…
Erg!” She ran an aggravated hand through her already-tousled strawberry
locks. “ We’re spoiled, that’s what it is. We’re just so used to finding
the answers we need here. A problem comes up and we go runnin’ to the
books. Then wham-bam-thank-you-ma’am,” She slapped her hand on the table
for emphasis. “ There it is all solutiony.”
“ You’re right, Wil. We need to think outside the box.” Xander made a
wide box-shaped gesture.
“ Yeah, but how?” Buffy rose from the table and began pacing. “I mean,
when there’s a new Big Bad in town I’m the go-to girl. Gimme danger. But
I don’t have the first clue about inter-diwhatsinal traveling, Universe
hopping or…or any of it!”
She stopped and threw up her hands in exasperation. Xander patted her
shoulder in a conciliatory way.
“ Don’t be so hard on yourself, Buffster. You research with the best of
‘em.”
“ I give it the old college try at least.” Buffy shot him a sideways
smile. “But this is making me insane-o girl!” She turned to her Watcher.
“ Giles, I need something I can slay here. Or at least, I need to slay
SOMETHING." She looked at him pleadingly. “ Maybe I could get some info.
out on patrol…”
“ We’ve already discussed this, Buffy. There are things it would be best
for Faith not to know. Particularly if she is as potentially dangerous
as you say. And if she were to see you… I’m sorry, but I do think it’s
important we maintain normal conditions here.” He smiled at her
apologetically. “Well, as normal as possible at any rate.”
Buffy sighed with frustration and pent-up energy. If she didn’t kill
something soon…
“ Okay. I get it. I don’t like it, but I get it.”
She’d slipped unconsciously into her best pouty face. Giles took it as a
warning that tempers were wearing thin.
“ Perhaps we should call it a night then. Resume our strategizing in the
morning?”
“ Who knows, maybe we’ll have a breakthrough by then.” Xander was ever
hopeful.
“ Maybe.” Buffy smiled at him distractedly.
“ You okay, Buff?” He asked, concerned.
“ Yeah, just a little restless. You know I’m all proactive gal.”
“ A little less conversation, a little more action?” Xander quoted, with
just a touch of Elvis.
Buffy gave him a real smile this time.
“ Exactly.”
“ Think of it as a mini-vacation.” He draped a casual arm around her
shoulders.
“ All slay and no play makes Buffy a dull girl?” she quipped. It was his
turn to smile now.
“ Exactly.” He gave her a playful squeeze. “ You could use this time to
spend with Riley. I mean I know he’s not exactly your Riley, but you do
still love the guy, right?”
*SO skirting this issue.*
“ Right.” She gave him a bright faux smile.
*If only the right guy were available for a play date…*
She thought, remembering a certain set of cool, strong hands, his sweet,
wet mouth and rock solid-
“ Buffy?” Willow called.
“ Yeah huh?” She felt a bit flushed. “ Sorry, just spaced out for a
minute. Guess I actually do need some sleep.”
“ I shouldn’t wonder, after last night.” Giles looked concerned.
“ I was just asking if you wanted me to walk home with you. I’m planning
on going to Tara’s, but it’s right on the way.” Willow also looked
worried.
Buffy gave them a reassuring smile.
“ No, really – I’m fine guys. A little alone time will do me some good.
Got a lot to think about right now.”
“ Of course.” Giles smiled back at her kindly. “ Do be careful though.
Glory and her minions are still about, not to mention the various other
vampires and demons Sunnydale has to offer.”
“ I know, don’t worry. I’ll give the bad guys a wide berth tonight.”
She did her best to sound sincere.
“ I promise.”
** Nahnahnahnah, hey hey hey, goodbye...say so long to Riley (and the
Biley portion of our story.) I know you hated it - but at least I didn't
subject you to the wretched, drawn out 'love' scenes like Joss did in
the show. *shudder* And while we're on the subject why couldn't he have
done the same for Spike and Buffy? But no, we get 60 second shots to
enjoy the sweet Spuffy lovin' and have to settle for freeze framing the
DVD's just to get a good look at Spike's drool-worthy...nevermind. I
don't do that. No sir. Uh uh, not me. (Ahem) Anyway, more goodies to
come. We're just getting to the good part, Folks. You're really gonna
love the next few chapters. :D More to come tuesday or wednesday at the
latest. xoxoxoxox Rosie
PS- Thanks for all your wonderful reviews and well-wishes. You guys rock
- I *heart* you all deeply. *snuggles of affection to all* ~ R.**
** More angst-free goodness coming your way. Gauranteed to give you a
happy. enjoy :) **
Chapter Twenty Six ~ I’m Beginning to See the Light
“ I used to ramble through the park, shadow boxing in the dark –
Then you came and lit the spark that’s a four-alarm fire now.
I never cared much for moonlit skies; I never winked back at fireflies.
But now that the stars are in your eyes, I’m beginning to see the light.
I never made love by lantern shine; I never saw rainbows in my wine.
But now that your lips are burnin’ mine, I’m beginning to see the
light.”
~ Bobby Darin
Buffy left the Magic Box feeling wound up and restless – ready for
action, with none to be had.
“ No patrolling tonight?” She grumbled kicking at a loose bit of gravel
in her path. “And just HOW am I supposed to sleep exactly?”
Maybe she’d get lucky and get attacked on the way home.
“ Yeah!”
She grinned happily thinking about it, picturing an entire pack of
demons descending on her.
*Ooo! Or maybe a vampire gang?*
Her hands just itched for a stake. This was the longest she’d gone
without a fight in four years, and she was feeling seriously deprived.
She found it wasn’t a sensation she enjoyed. She hated not being the
Slayer anymore. It made her feel stripped of her power and pushed aside.
In a way she supposed she was. No matter that it was her own choice that
got her here.
*Or A Buffy’s choice anyway.*
How the woman put up with it, she’d never know. Now here she was, having
to fulfill that role, play the good girl. And she never was very good at
making with the obedience. Being told not to do something only made her
want to do it more.
*Ya think Giles would’ve figured that out by now.*
She chuckled to herself at that. Who was he kidding? She was ALWAYS
gonna patrol tonight. You can’t keep a good Slayer down – and Faith or
no Faith she had work to do. Vamps to kill, demons to slay…frustrations
to work out. (Ahem) And she was developing a serious hate-on for Faith
again. Not like it was a stretch. Even if this Faith hadn’t done all of
those things, Buffy had no doubt that she was capable – of all that and
more. She knew it was only a matter of time for this one to snap too.
*You can take the girl outta the psycho, but never the psycho outta the
girl.*
It didn’t help her case any watching Faith hanging all over HER Spike.
Buffy let out an unconscious little growl at that. She knew she was in
another place, not her own – but nothing could stop the territorial
feelings she had where her people were concerned.
She knew exactly what she wanted, and once she made up her mind about
something; stand the hell back. Nothing was gonna get in her way. Not
Riley, not Faith - not even a skanky Hell god with permanent brain fry.
And no way some freaky magickal glitch was gonna steal her life from her
either. “Retired” or not, she was still the fucking Slayer and she was
gonna fight for what was hers.
And that included Dawn AND Spike, dammit. Seeing him with Faith like
that was just about more than she could take. And it finally drove home
the truth she’d been denying all this time.
*Years even.*
She wanted Spike. Buffy said it aloud, trying it on for size;
“ I want Spike.”
There, that wasn’t so bad. It felt kinda good actually. Try it again:
“ I want Spike. I do. I. Want. Spike.”
Plain as day. Here was the truth from her own mouth. And she’d spent all
that time fighting this why? ‘Cause now that she said it, it felt good,
right – freeing.
*Huh. So there really is something to that whole truth-will-set-you-free
thing. Who knew?*
Buffy felt more relaxed than she had in years. Was it the thought of
finally being with Spike? Or just the fact that she wasn’t being
repress-o girl anymore? All that holding back required an awful lot of
energy she’d discovered. She was almost giddy with relief. The ten-ton
weight she’d been carrying around her neck was gone.
She was through lying to herself. No more trying to squeeze into a mold
someone else made for her, no more whining, no more crying and best of
all:
*No more Riley.*
Oh yeah. They were going to have a loooong talk when she got back. (if
she got back?) And then it was bye bye, birdie. Nothing but sweet Spikey
goodness from now on. Buffy headed towards Stevenson Hall, smiling.
It was still odd to be back in the dorms, but she was getting used to it
again. At least here she knew AU Joyce was getting better and didn’t
need her. It gave her hope that her own mother would recover as well.
She unlocked the door to her room with a quiet click and looked around
at the mess in front of her.
*This place is a disaster – no wonder I’m feelin’ all comfy.*
There had been no time to tidy up in the past two days (God, had it only
been TWO?). They’d all been in full research mode since she got to this
crazy place. Buffy stared at the debris strewn around her side of the
room and sighed. She was so not in the mood to clean. (But when was she
ever?) Mom never let her slack at home, but when left to her own devices
chaos reigned. She settled for gathering all her dirty clothes into a
laundry basket and hiding it in her closet and shoving the huge heap of
schoolbooks under the bed.
*There all better.*
She smiled at her clever cleaning solution and flopped down on the
now-uncluttered bed, feeling tense and twitchy. She needed to get out on
rounds soon. If anyone asked she was just out walking and thinking
things through. No one would doubt that after tonight’s meeting
hopefully. God, when was the last time she’d had to cover up her
patrolling? Junior year? She couldn’t believe she was back here again.
Buffy sighed and got up to change her clothes. Her mind was buzzing with
images of Faith and Spike together along with thoughts of Riley and his
manly smothering. Then there were flashbacks from her nightmare just for
extra fun. It was truly heinous.
“ Well, nothing like a little bloodshed to cure what ails you.”
She smiled with sinister humor and pocketed several stakes, grinning in
anticipation as she headed out into the night
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Spike woke with a start, his breath catching in his throat. He gulped
unnecessary air, feeling suddenly suffocated.
*Another bloody dream.*
About the Slay… about Buffy. Dammit why was it always BUFFY? For years
now she’d haunted him. Seemed like everywhere he turned there she was –
still! And she wasn’t even the actual Slayer anymore – but try getting
his mouth to say that. He’d almost slipped up today, seeing her. And it
was a damn good thing Faith liked being called ‘Slayer’ in bed – or he’d
probably be dust by now. She didn’t like to share her toys – a mere hit
of a ‘ Bu - ’ and he’d fit neatly into an ashtray.
Jealous little thing she was – and jealous of Buffy most of all.
Privately Spike thought that havin’ the position as the one and only
Slayer was the lone thing keepin’ her from goin’ ‘round the bend.
*Do not pass go. Do not collect two hundred dollars.*
That and the Bit. Dawn helped keep her grounded, gave her something to
live for, to fight for. Gave him something to keep going for too. She
was one of the few people on this earth Spike had ever loved. Her and
Buffy – and long ago his own family. But he never loved Faith. He picked
up a smoke from the pack on the nightstand and lit it, thinking. At
first he’d found her right attractive. Put him in mind of Dru in a way,
‘cept she had all that excellent rage and strength. Faith was so fierce,
so wild; she was a white hat with a bad girl streak a mile wide. How
could he resist? He thought he’d found his perfect match at last – as if
Buffy was just a phase he was going through, a mad schoolboy crush he’d
be soon to forget. Spike snorted taking a long, slow drag. How naive
he’d been.
They’d cut a brutal swath through the demon population of Sunnydale in
the beginning – bashing and shagging for all they were worth. It was a
beautiful thing, the closest he’d felt to his old self since that
buggering chip was implanted. And he was content for a while. He had his
kills; he had a wild warrior woman in his bed. It seemed like enough at
the time… But all too soon a sense of dreadful emptiness crept in, a
sense of something missing. But what? He just couldn’t figure it out.
And then the dreams started. Vivid tableaus of he and Buffy fighting,
fucking, loving each other. He hadn’t seen their like since he first
realized he was in love with her. In bits and pieces they told him
everything he did not want to know. That Faith was vacant, that this is
all she was and all she could offer. An empty lay in an empty crypt.
They showed him all the ways she wasn’t Buffy, and never would be. In
the end Faith had only served to demonstrate to him what he really
wanted, but could never have. What a priceless cosmic joke.
He sighed and ground out his cigarette fiercely. And there was Buffy
still, a golden goddess dancing just out of his reach. Always enticing,
always enchanting but never near enough to touch. And now she was happy,
living the life she deserved. Away from all this bloodshed, from him and
his kind – in the light where she belonged. Maybe Peaches’d known what
he was on about for once. She met a normal guy, went to college – was
about to get married, the whole nine. Even if it was to Finn.
*The useless cunt.*
He spat. And don’t think that little announcement didn’t give him a
nasty turn. She was getting married. Then she’d graduate and leave, move
to Nebraska or Idaho or somewhere, have fine fat babies and grow old.
With someone else. It broke his heart into dry, jagged little pieces.
He’d gone on a week-long bender. Faith never asked him why. He suspected
on some level she already knew, but didn’t want to end their little
charade. As long as he kept up the pretense… And sad bastard that he
was, he did. ‘Cause Faith was better than nothing, right? Better than
pining over Buffy full-time and tossing off in the exile of his
loneliness.
*Ya waster.*
So here he was, stuck with a girl he didn’t love. Loving a girl he
couldn’t have. Some days he just prayed for death. Couldn’t go on like
this much longer. Seeing Buffy again like that made it plain. He’d felt
his heart leap into his throat. It was all he could do not to grab her
and kiss her the way he longed to, not to fall to his knees and beg her
to run away with him. He’d willed his mouth shut, saying as little as
possible. And then he’d practically used Faith as a human shield,
keeping her between him and Buffy at all times. He could hardly stand to
look at her. The sight of her hurt his heart. He was just grateful she
didn’t come ‘round much anymore. She stayed away from the cemeteries
these days. Had better things to do.
*Unlike me.*
“God enough! Enough!”
He’d had it with his own pathetic shite. Sitting here in the dark
obsessing over Buffy. Again.
*Better watch it, Mate. You’re this far from becoming a bleedin’
bunny-boiler.*
His little catnap had done nothing to soothe his nerves. For some
reason, the past two days the dreams had been worse than ever. He needed
to get his undead arse out of this hellhole and get in a few good kills.
That’d fix him right up. Nothing like a spot of violence to clear a
man’s head. Spike got out of bed and pulled on clothes from the
discarded pile on the floor. It was time he got out on his own anyway.
He’d patrolled with Faith every night this week. If he spent any more
time with the girl they’d be living together. He shuddered visibly at
the thought.
Maybe it was time to cool it off a bit, put a little distance between
them. Hell, maybe it was time to get out of Sunnydale for that matter.
Take a nice long road trip – or go back to London, clear his head. He
couldn’t hunt like he used to, but he’d make his way. He always did.
This was sounding better and better. Get the hell outta Dodge, ease up
with the little woman, get some space from Buffy.
“ Yeah. Bloody brilliant.”
Spike smiled genuinely for the first time all day. He headed up to the
upper level of his crypt and out into the night, whistling.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Buffy walked alone through the midnight silence of Shady Glen cemetery,
her brain on over-drive, trying to process the events of the past week.
*I mean, could things be any weirder?*
Hardly. She was trapped in an alternate Universe where her sister wasn’t
her sister, her boyfriend was her fiancé and Faith seemed to be living
what was rightfully Buffy’s life. There she was out on patrol
*(Or screwing Spike into the ground!!!)*
(Growl) Doing all the things she wanted to do. With the people she
wanted to be doing them with. She knew he wasn’t her Spike, but that
green eyed little monster was still there. It was probably better if she
avoided contact with Faith while she was here. Wouldn’t want any
unforeseen "accidents" to happen… Buffy grinned evilly at that.
She knew she should feel bad about Riley, but she just couldn’t bring
herself to. It was over and she knew it, and all she could feel about
that was profound relief. Other Buffy might want to marry the guy – Lord
knows why. She only knew that this Buffy didn’t want that. Riley was a
good man in his own way – but something was just plain missing. She
didn’t know what it was exactly; it was just something she felt
intuitively. What they had was good for awhile – but it wasn’t enough.
She needed…
*What?*
Passion maybe. Somebody that made her feel alive. Someone that lit her
up from the inside that she couldn’t wait to see. Someone that would
know everything about her and love her, the very worst parts of her -
not in spite of that, but because of it. Someone who could love her
Slayerness – the light and dark of her. Who could celebrate it, revel in
it with her. Because she was finally getting that. She had discovered
recently that she loved her calling and loved that part of herself.
Feeling strong and powerful, and being able to wield that power - well,
it felt damn good. Spike was right (which was happening annoyingly often
lately.) She loved it, and now she wanted someone who would love it too.
*And I have a good idea who that someone might be…*
Riley was not that someone. Never had that been illustrated more clearly
than at dinner the other night. He was so, so glad that she was retired.
He had every aspect of their quite little life planned down to the last
detail. And none of it included slaying, or vampires; she could even see
how he planned her friends right out of her life. He really didn’t want
her to have anything to do with the supernatural world in any way. She
couldn’t believe he would retire from the Initiative like that. But he
was bound and determined she would have everything she deserved. And
apparently he was the ONLY one who knew what that was.
It made her feel so suffocated. She didn’t know how other Buffy could
stand it. She was just glad she was getting out of here soon.(Hopefully
maybe?) Other Buffy would have to figure it out on her own. She was just
going to keep her head down and try not to do anything crazy like -
“ Spike.”
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Damn. Why was she here? Why now? Just when he was startin’ to get his
head on straight.
*Fuck.*
Alright, alright calm down. Act casual. Just try to get through this
without doing anything stupid like…
“ Buffy.”
Yes, exactly like that. Appealing as that idea seemed at the moment.
God, she looked gorgeous in the moonlight. Her hair became the palest
gold and her skin…
*Bloody berk. Get hold of yourself!*
“ What’re you doin’ about this late? Thought you gave it all up for lent
or some such.”
He gestured broadly to include the cemetery, himself and the night in
general. Buffy shrugged non-comittally.
“ Yeah. Well – I just needed to think. Had a lot on my mind.”
God, he looked good. If James Dean and Sid Vicious had a love child he
would look exactly like Spike. She wasn’t at all prepared for the effect
his physical presence had on her. She caught herself staring at his
wide, expressive mouth…remembering.
*Get a grip, Summers! This is not your Spike.*
But he looked like her Spike…she moved unconsciously closer. Did he
smell like him too? Would he taste the same…feel the same? She drew
nearer.
The Slayer was giving him a very interesting look right now. If he
didn’t know better he’d think… But that was bloody looney. She was well
ensconced in her happy little life. Practically a newlywed for fuck’s
sake. Probably just wishful thinking on his part.
*Yeah, right…wishful.*
Buffy stalked slowly closer. Thinking about her Spike, forgetting just
when it was that he’d become that. Missing him more than ever now that
his replica was standing here – right within her reach. Her hands ached
to touch him. Her lips to taste him. She thought of what it was she’d
wanted to do to him that night. To take him in her mouth right then and
there. She licked her suddenly dry lips.
Spike’s eyes widened at the sight of her little pink tongue skating
across lustrous cherry lips. Damn. He was getting the vibe off this girl
- hard. The stare down she was giving him - all hunger, all desire. He’d
been around long enough to recognize "The Look " when he saw it. But for
the unlife of him he couldn’t figure why. Why was Buffy, the future Mrs.
Riley Finn, makin’ with the bedroom eyes all the sudden? She was getting
him hard with that look. He swallowed reflexively. If she came on any
stronger he would quickly cease to CARE why…
“ Buffy – what…?”
He found himself backing away from the intensity of her hungry gaze.
Somewhere deep in his cerebral cortex a battle was being waged. Two
primal instincts were colliding. One identified himself as prey for the
deadly predator currently stalking him. The urge for flight was strong.
The other told him MATE is here, now. The urge to stay was stronger…
She was so close now. He could feel the heat of her skin from here. He
wanted to warm himself against the blaze of it. Her heartbeat sounded
fast and hard, as if she’d been running. But what was she running to? It
pulsed steadily in his ears, seeming to drown out all else. He was
losing himself, drowning in the visceral reality of her. He was about to
lose control, with no earthly idea how things had gotten to this point.
If she touched him, it was all over.
“ A-Are you okay, Love?”
He gave it one last try. He wasn’t sure whether he should be relieved or
disappointed when she stopped advancing on him, seeming to snap out of
the trance she was in. She looked like she’d forgotten where she was for
a moment.
“ Oh, Spike…yeah. I’m okay.”
Buffy blushed. What the hell was she doing? Stalking Spike like some
kind of crazed sex-maniac! Poor guy, no wonder he looked freaked. What
was the matter with her? He had a girlfriend here – and it wasn’t her.
*Faith.*
She thought sickly. And he was obviously in love with her. Buffy backed
off a few steps, feeling self-conscious and ill.
“I-I’m sorry about that. I was just…thinking about someone. You reminded
me of him and, I guess I just got lost in thought for a moment. I
must’ve looked pretty zoned out, huh?”
She stammered, hoping he wouldn’t guess just what she’d been thinking
about. That it hadn’t been totally obvious she was two seconds away from
devouring him whole like a cocktail olive.
“ Uh yeah. Right. No worries.”
He rubbed the back of his neck fretfully. Thinking of someone? Who? That
reminded her of him? Someone that made her …like that. Bloody hell.
“ Lucky bastard…”
He muttered under his breath, starting to pace. He felt entirely pent
up. Lit up and let down. The energy was buzzing through his veins. He
really needed a kill now.
“ What was that?”
Buffy asked, irritation flaring into her tone. Her desire for him
automatically sublimating itself. Old habits die hard.
“ Nothing.”
He continued to pace, ready to go on the hunt himself now.
“ It didn’t sound like nothing, Spike.”
She put her hand on her hip and raised an eyebrow at him expectantly. He
sighed.
*Bloody bint never could let things go.*
“ It’s just that, you didn’t seem lost in thought exactly.”
His tone was careful. Hers was not.
“ Oh? And what did I seem like then?”
She wanted to pursue this? Fine. He faced her squarely.
“ You seemed like you were on the bloody prowl, Slayer.”
Her mouth formed an incredulous O.
“ Whatever, Spike. What would you know about it?”
She was starting to piss him off now.
“ What would I know? A hundred twenty years is what I know. I’ve seen
every look there is – trust me. And I know the look you were just giving
me.”
She scoffed openly.
“ Yeah? And what look is that?”
He circled her, leaning in intimately. Giving her back a taste of
predatory stalking.
“ You looked at me like you wanted to devour my soul. Like you wanted to
shag me into the sodding ground.”
His voice was a low rumble in her ear, making her shiver. She tried to
sound convincing when she dismissed him this time.
“ You’re dreaming.”
He stood back, his arms crossed righteously.
“ Not this bloody time I’m not.”
He seemed so self-assured…wait - did he just admit to dreaming about
her?
“ W-what does that mean?”
She stammered out, momentarily confused. Spike realized his slip and
covered by interrogating her.
“ And who’s this fella you were thinkin’ about? The one that turns you
into a bleedin’ cat in heat?”
He accused.
“ Not that it’s any of your business, but I was thinking of Riley.”
She tried to sound breezy and confident.
“ Finn? You were thinking of soldier boy?”
He laughed out loud.
“ What? I was!”
Buffy looked indignant. This only made him laugh harder.
“ You’re telling me I remind you of Captain Cardboard now?”
Damn. She’d forgotten that part.
“ Oh - that is … I mean. No.”
She chewed her thumbnail anxiously. Dead give away - he had her now. And
he had a sneaking little suspicion about something…or was it just the
tiniest bit of hope?
“ So which is it then, Princess? That you were thinking of Riley? Or you
were thinking of someone else?” He leaned in close to whisper
seductively in her ear;“ Or is it really that you were thinking of me?’
She was working up a really excellent retort when Spike abruptly fell to
the ground.
Under the attack of an enormous vampire.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The thing was huge – had to be six foot six if it was an inch. Buffy
just stood and goggled for a minute, taken completely off guard. Very
un-Slayer like.
*Nice moves, Slick.*
She chastised herself, reaching at last for the stake tucked into her
waistband. She moved to strike, but Spike was on top of it, vamped out
and beating it down with all he was worth. A feral growl issued from his
throat.
*Is it wrong to think that is WAY hot?*
He looked gorgeous right now, primal – full of power. It made her girly
parts throb and tingle just watching him fight. She always did
appreciate a man with skills. Spike was in full kill mode - giving an
extremely dismayed vamp the thrashing of its unlife. It clearly thought
they were easy targets, a nice quick meal.
*Moron.*
She thought, amused. Any vamp who didn’t have the presence of mind to
recognize a master vampire and a Slayer deserves whatever it gets.
*Observe, Darwinism at work.*
She tossed Spike the stake at an opportune moment and watched him dust
it with casual grace. She almost wanted to applaud, it was so artfully
done. But she managed to contain herself. Spike got up from the kneeling
position he was in, slapping the vamp dust from his hands.
He stood there grinning. The joy of the kill written all over his face.
It was a look she recognized - a look she loved. She couldn’t help but
smile back. He turned to her, all cock-sure swagger and
self-satisfaction saying;
“ Now, Love – where were we?”
That’s when she kissed him.
** I cannot tell you the supreme delight I have taken in leading you all
astray this whole time. For the record, not once did I actually SAY that
Spike was in love with Faith. Go on, go check - I'll wait...See? Willow
makes an assumption and you just went with it. I led you down the
primrose path with sleight-of-hand and misdirection. I know, so very
evil. *GRIN* You went right along so willingly too... Mwahahahahaha! All
part of my sinister plot to give you a twisty and satisfying read. I
must be stopped. Or at least spanked. ;p More sweet spuffy lovin' to
come ( and some deeply graphic smut - oh, don't act like you don't love
it.) Stay tuned true believers... xoxoxox Rosie**
** No smut this chapter - sorry guys. Just sweet, sweet Spuffness. Enjoy
:) **
Chapter Twenty Seven ~ Knock Me a Kiss
“ I like cake, and no mistake. But, Baby, if you insist I’ll cut out
cake, just for your sake.
Baby, come on – knock me a kiss. I like pie, I hope to die - just get a
load of this.
When you get high, doggone the pie. Baby, come on - knock me a kiss.
When you press your lips to mine, t’was then I understood;
They taste like candy, brandy and wine, peaches, bananas and everything
good.
I like jam, and no flim-flam, scratch that off my list. This ain’t no
jam, the jam can scram.
Baby, come on – knock me a kiss.”
~ Louis Jordan
Spike staggered back under the assault, arms and mouth suddenly full of
warm, sweet Buffy.
No time to think, only react. His body took over and did what came
naturally - he kissed her back with everything he had. Months of
dreaming, longing and frustration poured out of him and into that kiss.
He felt her response building to match his until they were practically
eating each other alive.
*So good, so good.*
She knew it was wrong. Wrong time, wrong place, wrong man. Not her man.
But she just couldn’t help it, couldn’t stop the runaway train that
carried her forward. It was like she was magnetized to his side. Didn’t
matter, none of it mattered. He was here, now - he was everything she
wanted. Faced with him she could no longer deny that she loved him,
needed him, wanted him. All questions, warnings and consequences faded
out like background noise until they stood inside a perfect silence.
“ Need you…”
She murmured.
“God, Buffy you have no idea.”
She smiled seductively.
“ Show me.”
He kissed her fiercely, possessively. His need for her a roaring empty
ache inside him. The feel of her made him high. No drug he’d ever had
compared to the slick sweetness of her mouth or the smoldering silk of
her skin. He pulled her tight to him, craving contact. She burned him
with her body heat, even through both sets of clothes. What he wouldn’t
do to have nothing between them at this moment. His hands mindlessly
sought her flesh. He wanted in, he wanted under – whatever it took.
He gasped when he felt her hands seeking him. And when they slid up
under the free edge of his shirt he groaned, the skin-to-skin contact
was almost too much. He pulled back to look at her, to confirm that she
was real. That this was really happening. She smiled at him sweetly and
touched his face, as if she knew what he was thinking. “ I’m here.” her
eyes seemed to say. He wanted desperately to take her home. The two of
them in private, with all the time in the world…
“ Buffy, could we…?”
He caught his breath, afraid of her answer.
“ Let’s go.” she said simply.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
She took his hand firmly in her own, and his eyebrows rose up to meet
his hairline.
Surprise # 599 for the night. Who WAS this girl? And what happened in
the last 24 hours to give her such a change of heart toward him? He was
stunned, but afraid to question his good fortune overmuch. They walked
quietly back to his crypt, comfortably hand in hand. It was such a
small, tender gesture – but it made him want to weep all the same. There
were so many things he wanted to say right now. His head filled with a
thousand questions, but he was terrified to speak lest he break whatever
spell was at work here. He settled on silence.
*For the moment.*
Buffy felt high on his presence, the solid reassuring feel of his hand
in hers. She hadn’t realized just how deprived she’d felt until tonight.
It had only been a matter of a few days since she’d seen him – her
Spike. But God, how everything had changed. Funny how everything you
thought you knew could turn out to be so wrong. As wrong as wrong could
be. And life – it could transform with dizzying speed.
This thing with Spike had been building for awhile. She’d just started
to recognize that the night she “left”. Sooner or later she might have
come around, realized what was right in front of her. Realized how she
really felt, deep down inside… But more likely she would’ve clung
stubbornly to Riley and all her stupid ideals. She knew how she could be
when she got stuck on something. She decided it was so, and nothing but
a giant catastrophe could change her mind. She shook her head, sighing
at her own willfulness.
*Hey, it only took sending me to a whole ‘nother Universe to get it this
time.*
Everything that happened since she got here had opened her eyes a little
more. Each event stripping away the blindness and lies she wrapped
herself in. Losing Dawn like that, knowing she might be stuck here and
never get her back? It split her heart in two. Pile on having her status
as Slayer stripped away, feeling useless and disempowered. She hated
that feeling, it made her feel so vulnerable, so naked. And the final
blow – actually seeing Faith with Spike. Ugh, it made her sick. Add a
dash of overbearing Riley-ness and here she was, wide-awake in
dreamland.
You couldn’t blame her for jumping on Spike really. Now that she knew,
REALLY knew how she felt - she couldn’t hold it back. And she might
never get back to her own world. She could be here forever, never having
Dawn back. Never being a Slayer again. She needed the comfort only Spike
could give her now. He was the only one she could lay her heart out to,
knowing he would listen and not judge. Just like he always had. She
shook her head again in disbelief. How had she missed that? All the ways
he’d been there for her all this time.
*Duh, Buffy. Just duh!*
She clutched his hand tighter and rested her head on his shoulder as
they walked. If she had to be here, at least she had this, had him. He
was a find in any world, a treasure. Too bad it took her so long to see
that. But all she could do now is make up for lost time. She looked up
at him walking silently beside her. He looked overwhelmed, and no
wonder. She was pretty whelmed herself. He looked back down at her and
smiled gently, wonderingly at her. As if she were an angel newly
materialized before his eyes – a miracle. In a way, she supposed she
was.
Buffy realized she was going to have to tell him. She didn’t want to
start anything they might have off with lies. Not to him. He had a right
to know everything that was going on. And a right to make his own
decision… She swallowed her fear down forcibly. What if he didn’t want
her then? Knowing that she might only be a visitor here, that she might
disappear on him. And if other Buffy came back she might not feel the
same. God, this was complicated. She knew she’d have to tell Riley soon
too. She just couldn’t stand another moment of being smothered by him.
Just being around him felt suffocating lately. She dreaded that
conversation, knew how hurt he would be.
But what else could she do? She had to be honest, and just deal with the
repercussions.
She was stuck here, for who knows how long - maybe even forever. She
just had to go with it. Fortunately, she was a flexible girl. Being a
Slayer really taught you how to roll with the punches. And Buffy wasn’t
about to get her ass kicked here.
Lost in her own thoughts, she was surprised how quickly they arrived at
his door. The exact same crypt he was housed at in her world. Funny how
so many little things were exactly the same. Like the look in his eyes
right now, so eloquently telling her everything that was in his heart.
Somehow she’d overlooked that too.
*More like blocked it out, stubborn bitch that I am.*
When he took her in his arms and kissed her she could not think for the
life of her why. How had she denied herself this love? This passion? How
had she denied herself him? From where she was standing now, it seemed
like straight up insanity. She was so safe right now, so loved. There
was nowhere else in any Universe she would rather be at this moment.
Spike kissed her gently, tenderly – the way he’d always wanted to. She
was a sweet, solid weight in his arms. He felt complete and at ease for
the first time ever. That hollow hungry feeling that had taken up
residence under his breastbone these many years was suddenly gone. It
was so right, so good – there just had to be a catch. Whatever it was, a
spell, a hallucination, he was going to make the most of it for as long
as he bloody could.
*Make hay while the sun shines an’ all that rot.*
He broke the kiss to pull her inside and up into his arms. He twirled
her briefly and then kissed her again soundly. She laughed giddily,
making him grin like an idiot. Luckily her own smile was just as goofy.
Could it really be she felt the same? His eyes searched hers for an
answer. She smiled down at him from her place in his arms and kissed him
so tenderly, so sweetly – he thought his heart would turn to dust inside
his chest.
That’s when she uttered the four most dreaded words for any man to hear;
“ We have to talk.”
*Uh oh.*
He set her down carefully.
*This can’t be good.*
** I know, I'm so mean - another cliffie. But at least I updated quickly
this time. And who delivers the good ol' Spuff huh? More to come soon,
Happy Campers :) *snuggles* Rosie xoxoxoxox **
** A brand new chappie in honor of my b-day. Reviews are always a
fantabulous gift incidentally. (Ahem) A little light smut, minor angst
and lots of lovely Spuff. Enjoy :) **
Chapter Twenty Eight ~ But I Do Love You
“I don’t like to turn the radio on just to find I missed my favorite
song.
And I don’t like to be the last with the news –
But I do love you, but I do love you.
I don’t like to be alone in the night.
And I don’t like to hear I’m wrong when I’m right.
And I don’t like to be the one with the blues –
But I do love you, but I do love you.”
~ Leanne Rimes
Buffy watched the look of fear transform his face and rushed to soothe
it away.
“ Baby, no – don’t worry. I’m not leaving you.”
His face relaxed into relief.
“ At least I don’t think I am…”
And promptly crumpled into confusion.
“ Buffy what…? What’s goin’ on?”
*Did the Slayer just call me baby?*
His brain goggled at the thought. Buffy took his hands and sat him down
on the battered plaid sofa in his living area. It was patched with duct
tape, and very much worse for wear. It looked like AU Spike didn’t take
as much pride in his home as hers did. Interesting… those little
differences. She wondered momentarily what other discrepancies she might
find…
“ Spike, I have a lot to tell you. Some of it you’re really not gonna
like. But I don’t want to lie to you…”
He withdrew his hands from hers, scowling. She could see the defenses
going up already.
“ Baby, please don’t be like that. You need to know this stuff. Besides
I have good stuff to tell you too.”
She coaxed, rubbing his arm.
*She DID call me baby!*
He suppressed his smile, and gave her a dubious eyebrow instead.
“ Oh yeah? Like what?”
He was so cute when he pouted, she couldn’t help but smile at his
childishness. She leaned in to kiss his pouty lip.
“ How ‘bout like: I’m in love with you?”
His face almost split open from the enormous grin this brought on. He
pulled her onto his lap and kissed her breathless.
“ Do you know…” he panted in between kisses “ how long… I’ve waited to
hear you say that ?!”
He squeezed her in a bear hug and kissed her neck and ears until she was
giggling helplessly.
“ Um… a week?”
She teased when she regained her composure somewhat.
“No.”
He shot back, with a warning raise of his eyebrow.
She smiled slyly at him.
“ A month?”
He growled low into her ear, making her shiver.
“ Try again, Pet.”
“ Two months?”
She asked, all innocence.
He threw her onto her back with a roar, nuzzling her neck and nipping at
her earlobe. Buffy shrieked and giggled, having the time of her life. He
kissed her thoroughly, until she was quite chastened and said;
“ Try all my bloody life and more.”
And then kissed her again. Taking his time with it now – enjoying the
soft fullness of her lips and the velvet slide of her tongue against
his. She kissed him with such fire, it made him instantly hard. It was
all he could do not to grind himself into her ferociously and tear her
clothes off. But that wasn’t how he wanted their first time to be.
Buffy felt him hardening on her hip and was stirred to do something
about it. She adjusted her body to fit neatly into his and wrapped her
legs around him. He groaned into her shoulder and slid his hands along
her outer thighs. She felt herself getting wet for him already. It took
so damn little to make her want him.
Spike moved his hands to cup her luscious bum, wishing fervently for
summer weather and short skirts. Then there would be nothing between
them but a zipper and a pair of her tiny little panties. The thought
made his cock throb.
*God, if only…*
Her eyes widened as she felt him pulse against her. He was so incredibly
hard right now, and he wanted her so much. She tightened her legs around
him and pressed herself up into his erection with a small hum of
pleasure. He could smell her arousal and feel her damp heat against him.
Her response to him carried him right over the edge of his precarious
control. He grasped her perfect little ass and pulled her tight as he
ground into her with purpose, angling for the sweet spot. He felt her
shudder and whimper beneath him and it spurred him on. They kissed
hungrily as they writhed together on the couch like a couple of
teenagers out past curfew on a Saturday night. It was bloody marvelous.
He pulled back to unbutton her shirt, leaving her sheer shimmery bra
exposed. He caught his breath at the most perfect breasts in creation.
He moved to taste a dusky rose-colored nipple through the fabric and she
cried out breathlessly.
*That’s it. Naked time. NOW.*
He sat back to pull off the duster and his black paisley shirt. When he
got to his tight black t-shirt she stilled his hand.
“ Wait.”
He groaned inwardly.
*No, no, no. PLEASE no.*
He thought feverishly. Don’t let her stop now. He couldn’t take it if
she turned him away. He was almost afraid to look in her eyes. Afraid
he’d see the spell had suddenly ended. Then he’d be left alone without
her again. He couldn’t bear it.
“ Baby, please – don’t think for one second that I don’t want to.”
She leaned forward and cupped his chin forcing him to meet her eyes.
“ I want you so much.”
The confession would have taken his breath, had he needed any. He looked
into her eyes questioningly.
“It’s just that I need to tell you this stuff. Before we…go any
farther.” She continued, curling up protectively on her end of the
battered sofa. “ And after… You might not want to.”
She finished quietly. It was her turn to look away.
And he thought he was as shocked as he could possibly get already.
“ What on earth do ya think you could say that would possibly make me
stop wanting you?!” He sat forward and held her shoulders gently in his
hands. “ Buffy, you could be covered in the bloody pox and I’d still
want you.”
She looked at him longingly, wanting to believe. He pulled her into his
arms.
“ Hell, I’ll probably still be wanting you when you’re 102.”
That made her giggle a little and she snuggled into his chest. A wicked
thought occurred to her.
“ What if I told you I switched bodies and I’m really Xander?”
He pulled back giving her a look of horror.
“ Ah! Don’t say such things, Love. You’ll put me off my breakfast.”
That made her laugh out loud. God, it was good to talk to him like this.
Flinging around the casual banter, making each other laugh, teasing like
they always had. She’d never realized until now what blatant flirtation
that was. Well, now that she knew she was going to enjoy it to the
fullest. She eyed him slyly.
“ Oh, C’mon you know you’ve always had a secret crush on Xander. That’s
why you torment him so much. Typical boy maneuver.”
She taunted mercilessly. Spike gawked at her all wounded indignance.
“ Gah! No – never – more like the other way ‘round. That boy’s been
givin’ me the eye since day one. And! - And he started it.”
Buffy chuckled giddily. She just loved riling him up. She grinned evilly
and dug in his belly for a tickle.
“ Hey! Oi! Slayer…quit…”
He laughed helplessly, squirming. She was enjoying herself thoroughly
and went for the kill swirling her finger in his navel. Spike let out a
surprised squeak and broke down giggling.
*So it does work. How ‘bout that?*
It made her wonder if her dream really had been prophetic.
*Oooo – massages, yum! And oily, naked sex!*
Now that was the kind of prophecy a girl could get into. Buffy smiled
happily, thinking of things to come. She stopped her tickle assault and
settled down to lounge comfortably against his chest, content for the
moment. He stroked her hair soothingly then asked her;
“ Hey, how’d you know about my secret spot? No one knows about that.”
“ Call it woman’s intuition.”
She smiled enigmatically.
“ So you are a woman then? I haven’t been snogging madly with Harris all
night?”
He questioned teasingly.
“ No, Dork.” She snorted. “ It’s me - as if you wouldn’t know.”
“ I’d know you anywhere, Pet.”
He agreed, kissing the top of her head. He sighed, might as well get to
it.
“ So - Are you ready to spill all your horrifyin’ secrets then?”
She looked up at him tentatively, questioningly.
“ You’re not worried now?”
He put on his best brave face.
“ What could be worse than makin’ out with Harris?”
He chuckled, smiling.
So she told him.
**Oh no! I did it again... Bad, bad Rosie. I am evil and wrong and must
be punished (Please?) He he he... Before you all rebel on me, this is
the last cliffie. Really. I mean it. You believe me right? Cause I would
never, ever mislead you... But seriously, I promise to make them
actually talk next chapter. Honestly. Trust me.... ;p *slightly
innappropriate PDA to all* xoxoxox Rosie**
** A little angst, a lot of sweet Spuff - and a complete, non-cliffie
chappie just for you :) **
Chapter Twenty Nine ~ Never Tear Us Apart
“Don’t ask me what you know is true.
Don’t have to tell you I love your precious heart.
I was standing. You were there. Two worlds collided.
And they could never tear us apart.
We could live for a thousand years,
But if I hurt you I’d make wine from your tears.
I told you that we could fly, ’cause we all have wings
But some of us don’t know why.
I was standing. You were there. Two worlds collided.
And they could never, ever tear us apart.”
~ INXS
It took Buffy over an hour to enlighten him to the whole sordid mess.
Starting with the night her and other Spike had nearly made love in the
graveyard ending with dinner with Riley and seeing him with Faith. She
told him about her dreams, and all the things she’d thought about in
between – how she realized they’d been working up to this all along. And
most of all how she just couldn’t deny that she was in love with him one
moment longer. But the complications – oh, the complications…
Spike’s face was blank with shock. Whatever story he’d been expecting to
hear, it wasn’t this. He could never’ve dreamed this one up in a million
years. Alternate Universes? An alternate him? And this wasn’t his
Buffy…not technically speaking? And his Buffy was where?
“ Sweet bleedin’ Christ.”
He whispered, voice soft with awe. He had no idea what to do. Here in
front of him, was the very thing he’d wanted most in all his days. Buffy
was here, now - telling him she loved him; she wanted him - wanted to be
with him. But the hows and whys of it were staggering. It seemed
impossible; he’d seen some truly strange shite in his time - and hello,
vampire – but THIS…
“ You sure you didn’t just get a knock on the head?”
He eyed her skeptically.
“ No! Why does everyone keep asking me that?”
She scowled with annoyance.
“ Sorry, Love. Guess that’s just the easiest explanation.” He shook his
head wonderingly.
“ Lot easier to grasp than this…”
Buffy was curled on the far end of the sofa, arms wrapped around herself
protectively.
“ I just needed you to know. In case…”
She looked down, unable to finish.
“ In case you go back you mean.”
His voice betrayed none of his inner turmoil.
“ Yes.”
She looked up at him tentatively; so afraid of what she might see.
“ Is that what you want…? ”
How could he be asking her if she wanted to leave him? But he had to
know. He clenched his jaw, bracing himself inwardly for her answer.
“ I don’t know right now. You’re here in front of me and I don’t want to
let go. But I don’t know if I belong here. And I miss Dawn…” Her voice
caught and trembled. “ And what if she needs help? I don’t know if … if
your Buffy is there with her, or where she is. Dawn might have no one to
protect her from Glory now.” She paused, terrified for what her sister
might be facing without her. “ And don’t I owe your Buffy something too?
I mean this is her life I’m messing with.” She placed her hands on the
back of her neck anxiously, tangling them in her hair. “ God, Spike it’s
all so complicated and strange. I may be here forever, and if I am - I
know what I want now. I know the life I want to have.”
She looked at him meaningfully. He took her hand and kissed it. The
tears slipped from the corners of her eyes, finally overflowing and he
moved to hold her, gathering her into his lap.
“ It’s alright, Love. It’ll be alright.” He stroked her back,
comforting. “All we ever have is now. You know that, you’re a bloody
Slayer! So we take what time we have together and make the most of it.”
He said firmly, as if that were the obvious answer.
She broke down sobbing into his shoulder, clinging to him.
“ But what if I leave you here? I can’t do that to you! If she comes
back she might not feel like this…and then…and then you’ll be alone
again.”
She finished quietly, stifling her sobs. He held her away from him
looking at her intently.
“ Buffy, I’d rather have you now, while I can, than never have you at
all.” His own tears stood out in eyes. “ And as terrified as I am of
losing you again, I’m not so cowardly as to miss the one chance I may
ever have to be with you.”
His tears slid down his face and into her hair as he held on to her
tightly, as if she might disappear from his very grasp.
“ At least I’ll have this, now. I’ll have it to get me through if - ”
He choked, unable to continue. He couldn’t believe the madness of this
life. How could he be offered all he’d dreamed of in one breath and in
another have it all taken away from him? What kind of monsters were
these gods, these Powers That Be to play with lives like this? He
couldn’t begin to fathom what their plans were. He felt a surge of
profound resentment.
*You can’t have her!!*
He thought fiercely.
*I WON'T let you take her from me.*
Her tears fell unchecked pattering dark blots onto his black shirt. She
felt so helpless right now, so out of control of her own life. She hated
it so much.
“ But I might not have a choice, Spike.” She sniffled. “I mean I didn’t
put myself here, I just woke up in bed with Riley.”
He growled unconsciously at that.
“ I could be yanked back at anytime. Sometimes I think I might only be
dreaming…but it’s so real…”
She trailed off wonderingly.
“ So even if you decide to stay…you can’t be sure you will.”
His voice was flat and dead with the pain of it.
“ Yes. I HATE that, Spike. I hate it!”
She pulled back from him, wanting him to know, to understand.
“ I know, Love. I know. I hate it too.” He soothed, pulling her close
again. “ But you say the Scoobies are workin’ on it – and old Rupes?
We’ll figure it out then. You lot always do.” His voice was full of
confidence, easing her fears. “ Certainly put an end to enough of my
evil schemes.”
She chuckled along with him this time.
“ True.”
She burrowed into the security of his arms. Somehow feeling safe. It was
hard to imagine anything hurting her here. But she knew deep down, there
was always something out there in the darkness, gunning for her.
*If they really ARE after you is it still paranoia?*
She wondered tiredly, the exhaustion of the last few days dragging her
down.
“ See, Love? It’ll be alright. I’ll MAKE it so.”
He said firmly - with the kind of conviction that could only belong
To a man in love.
** See, I really can write a non-cliffie chapter...Once in awhile ;p
Next time pornaliciousness and a nice long update. And fret not
children, all questions will be answered and all conflicts resolved by
the end. I guarantee happy endings for everyone (I'm sappy that way).
*warm fuzzies to all* Rosie xoxoxoxox**
** I don't think yer ready for this jelly - this chapters too
pornalicious for ya, baby... Time to slip into something comfy and enjoy
the sweet, juicy Spuffy lovin' -- Mmmmhmmm. Go on, you know you want it,
you know I want you to ...
PS ~ This is the best Schlock Rock song EVER so I just had ta use it -
and what better chapter? ;p **
Chapter Thirty ~ Lady
“ Lady, when you’re with me I’m smiling, give me all of your love.
Your hands build me up when I’m sinking; just touch me and my troubles
all fade.
You’re my lady of the morning, love shines in your eyes. Sparkling,
clear and lovely. You’re my Lady.
Lady, turn me on when I’m lonely, show me all of your charms. Evenings
when you lay down beside me, just take me gently into your arms. You’re
my lady of the morning. Love shines in your eyes, Sparkling, clear and
lovely – you’re my lady.”
~ Styx
She awoke the next afternoon in Spike’s bed -disappointingly fully
dressed. The only things missing were her socks and boots.
“Hey.” she said sleepily. “ What happened?”
He smiled down at her adoringly.
“ You fell asleep in my arms, so I carried you down here. Hope you don’t
mind.”
She smiled at him sweetly.
“ No. But what am I wearing all these clothes for?”
He snorted.
“ Don’t think I wasn’t tempted, Pet. Just didn’t think I could control
myself otherwise.”
She grinned.
“ I wouldn’t have minded.”
“ Oh, now you tell me.”
He kissed the tip of her nose and rolled her onto his chest for a
cuddle.
She chuckled at that, snuggling into his embrace.
“ And you – with the t-shirt.” She lifted up the blankets suspiciously,
rising up on one elbow. “ And the boxers. I always pictured you as a
sleeping naked kinda guy.”
He raised his eyebrow at her, smirking.
*Picturing me naked was she?*
“ Normally I am. Again with the admirable self-control.”
She shot him a coquettish pout.
“ I don’t know if I like this new self-control having. I like my Spikes
self-control free.”
He grinned wickedly, admiring the delicious temptation of her protruding
lower lip.
“ Oh you don’t know what you’re in for, missy…”
He pounced on her, making her shriek with delight and captured the
offending lip between his teeth gently. He sucked it into his mouth and
then released it for a languorous kiss, enjoying the feel of her
sleep-warmed body against his. If he had his way they would wake up like
this every bloody day.
“ Mmmm.” She hummed. “Yum. Morning Spike…” She kissed him back and
wrapped her legs around him, skating her feet down the backs of his legs
sensually. “ I like Morning Spike.” She said between kisses. “ Speaking
of which…” she giggled, admiring his growing erection.
“ What’d you expect? I got you in my bed draped all over me. I’m not
bleedin’ dead
y’know.”
“ Well, actually…”
“ Ah ah – that’s un dead, Princess. As you can clearly see.”
He gripped the solid mass through his boxers proudly, a cocky grin on
his face.
“ I really didn’t get that good of a look at it…”
She said coyly, lifting up the covers for a peek.
*My, my - is it really as big as it seems?*
He raised an inquiring eyebrow at her. She just smiled at him
enigmatically.
*Kitty wants to play, eh?*
He flipped open the covers and lay back comfortably with his hands
behind his head.
“ By all means, Love. What’s mine is yours.”
He dared her with an insolent smirk and a cock of his eyebrow.
*Well, you can’t blame a girl for being curious…*
She smiled tentatively and reached out a shy hand to feel him through
the black striped cotton. He gasped when he felt the warmth of her
through the thin fabric.
*Shite, what have I gotten myself into?*
He didn’t know how much ‘playing’ he could withstand at this point. She
smiled with more conviction now, encouraged by his reaction. Boldly she
worked her hand inside his waistband to hold the erection itself, flesh
to flesh.
He clenched his jaw fighting for self-control. He was not gonna come in
his shorts like some nancy schoolboy. But her soft little hand was on
him. BUFFY'S hand. Exploring his body with such naive curiosity. It was
almost more than he could bear.
She pushed his boxers down a bit and sat beside him Indian-style. She’d
felt it before of course, that night in the graveyard. But it was dark
and they were…rushed. She’d never seen it all up close and personal. In
fact she’d hardly seen any, in the flesh – so to speak. She’d only been
with Angel the one time, and it had been in the giddy charge of teenage
emotions. Parker: a one night stand in the dark. And Riley. Well, let’s
just say foreplay wasn’t his thing. Neither were lights. Or
experimentation of any kind. She wondered briefly for a moment how other
Buffy could possibly be marrying him.
*So not my problem. Thank God.*
She thought, happily turning her attention to this new pretty thing in
her hands. And it was pretty. She never thought a penis could be such a
thing. But Spike’s was beautifully made. A long and elegant shaft,
alabaster white with a marble of blue veins here and there, tinged
faintly with pink just around the head. And thick too, her small hand
barely fit around it.
*So it IS as big as it looks.*
She grinned wickedly, anticipating fun to come. Spike caught her smile
and swallowed reflexively. He had a feeling he was in for more trouble
than he bargained for. (And wasn’t he always when it came to Buffy?)
When she began to move her hand she proved him right.
Buffy caressed him teasingly, enjoying herself. She’d never had one to
really play with before. And Spike made her feel so comfortable, like
she could do whatever she wanted and it was A-okay. Running her nails
lightly over the length to the head, she felt him quiver. Then she
grasped it firmly in one hand and stroked it, using the foreskin to
manipulate him dexterously. She listened to his strangled gasp with
satisfaction.
*Boy parts are fun!*
She thought giddily. She continued stroking him gently with one hand and
moved the other up under his shirt to play with the flat planes of his
stomach and chest. When she flicked her nail over his nipple she felt
his cock jump in her hand. He groaned out loud.
*Oooo! Looky what I found: a magic button!*
She was having entirely too much fun he decided – ready to pin her to
the bed and have some fun of his own. He was just picturing the look on
her face as he ripped her pants off with his teeth when her voice broke
thorough his thoughts.
“ You know there are entirely too many clothes in this bed.”
She declared, pushing up the hem of his shirt. He raised his eyebrow at
her.
“ You want it off then?”
She nodded confidently, smiling.
“ All of it?”
He let the question hang seductively in the air.
“ Oh yeah.”
She grinned wider. When he moved to take his shirt off she started
unbuttoning her own.
“ Buffy…”
He stumbled, getting an eyeful of her delectable tits.
“Yesss?”
She purred, shedding her blouse. He gulped audibly.
“ If you…” he cleared his throat, rallying. “ If you take off your
clothes I will not be able to keep myself from ravishing you.
THOROUGHLY.”
Damn William and his gentlemanly notions! They popped up at the most
inconvienient times.
*I am NOTa gentleman!*
Spike thought sourly. But alas, he was – when it came to love. William
remained a part of him, however hard he tried to smother the ponce.
“Oh.”
Buffy flushed prettily, taking his meaning. She wasn’t quite ready for
unrestrained Spike yet. She just wanted to play right now, enjoying each
other without any pressure. But boys were always in such a hurry… She
sighed, thinking.
“ Well, give me your shirt then.”
He looked at her blankly.
“ Give me your shirt.” She repeated slowly. “I wanna be comfortable, and
my clothes are all…bindy. You take your clothes off, I keep some on.
See? Perfect compromise. I get to play, you get to enjoy – and nobody
gets 'ravished'.”
“ But what if I want to ravish you?”
He pouted, clearly unconvinced. She shook her head in the negative.
“ Too bad, Mister man. You’re just gonna have to wait your turn.”
He grumbled at this, but took his shirt off and handed it to her. He was
just reaching for his boxers when she unzipped her jeans and began
sliding them off. Well, she didn’t expect him not to watch did she? He
wasn’t insane… For a moment there she was all but naked in nothing but a
matching set of sheer glimmery underwear. He could see her nipples
perfectly and the dark curls of her sex. Unclothed the scent of her
arousal filled the air like perfume. His cock throbbed painfully against
his belly.
She had no idea what she was askin’ of him right now. Restrain himself?
With her? Christ! The chit expected bloody miracles. He growled low in
his throat in protest, but sat back on the bed in surrender all the
same. Buffy pulled his black tee over her head and flipped her silky
blonde hair out of the neck. God, she was perfection. She made his plain
t-shirt look like the sexiest lingerie he’d ever seen. He sighed
lustfully and pulled off his boxers, her slave once more.
She crawled onto the bed and sat next to him, cross-legged. With
practiced ease she did the infamous girly bra trick and pulled it out
one sleeve, tossing it over her shoulder.
“ Ta da.”
She said, grinning mischievously.
“ Oh, that is SO unfair. You in my shirt, no bra and those tiny little
knickers? And you expect me to control m’self… Whaddya think I am, woman
- made of steel?”
She eyed him archly.
“ Do I have to tie you up?”
“ Don’t say things like that, Pet.” He chuckled ruefully. “ You’re not
helping matters. Though I do have a pair of shackles about, if you’re
really interested.”
She seemed to pause and consider this.
“ Maybe later - If you’re a good boy. Now lie back and close your eyes.”
“ I should’ve known you were a top. Bloody control freak…”
But he smiled when he said it and lay down obediently.
The first lick caught him off guard. Her tongue was warm and lusciously
wet as it traced his neck up to his ear. She scraped his earlobe with
her teeth and flicked it with the tip of her tongue. He stifled a groan.
*She is in SERIOUS trouble after this.*
Buffy found the curve where his shoulder and neck met and gave him a
sharp sucking bite there. He shuddered and moved to pull her down to
him, wanting to capture her mouth. His eyes flew open in surprise when
she pinned his hands to the bed roughly.
“ No touching.”
She commanded. He growled back at her willfully.
“ Do you want me to stop?”
She arched a perfect brow at him.
“ No.”
He finally admitted.
“ Well then. No touching.”
He grumbled a bit, but put his hands down at his sides, clenching his
fists in frustration.
“ You’re gonna pay for this later, Pet.”
He threatened, closing his eyes again. She smirked.
“ We’ll see.”
She was thoroughly enjoying being in control for a change. Her life had
been full of men that decided they knew what was best for her. Her
father, Giles, the Council, Angel, and more recently; Riley. She was
damn tired of it. Giles she trusted, and lately they seemed to have
formed more of a partnership, working side by side. But the rest of them
could go straight to Hell. She was taking control of herself and her own
life, right now. From the looks of things she found the perfect partner
to do that with. Finally a man that was willing to let her be in charge
for once. And she did SO love getting him to submit.
She grinned wickedly and bent back to her work - tracing the hollow of
his collarbone with her tongue and then moving lower to capture a pale
pink nipple in her mouth. He rewarded her with a small moan, and she
sucked harder rolling the other one in between her fingers - just as he
had once done to her. It was a very effective technique; she should
thank him for that later. She leaned over him switching sides, using her
teeth to nip and scrape over them roughly. He was panting raggedly now
and she could feel his erection pulsing against her stomach.
God, she was killing him. Working his nipples like that – how did she
know? And he could feel the unfettered fullness of her breasts brushing
him every time she moved. It was driving him mad not to be able to reach
under the loose fabric of her shirt and take them in his hands. He was
burning permanent crescent marks into his palms he was clenching his
fists so tightly. Spike didn’t know how much longer he could last. But
he really, really did not want her to stop.
When she licked down to his belly and paused briefly to dip her tongue
into his navel he almost lost control. He couldn’t remember ever being
this aroused before. The combination of her sweet inexperience and
uninhibited playfulness was a heady cocktail. Oh, the things he could
show her. All the things he dreamed about were on the verge of
happening. He couldn’t wait to make her come… He cut off that train of
thought before it got him into trouble. He was about to lose it as it
was, he didn’t need any naughty thinking spurring him along.
Buffy bypassed his cock in favor of his tasty looking hipbones, tracing
the outline of each carefully. Then positioned herself between his legs
to trace the inside of each thigh. She stopped over his femoral artery
to give him a long tingling hickey. She could feel him trembling to
contain himself, to hold back. It made her giddy with excitement.
*Well whaddaya know - I’m actually good at this.*
Finally someone gave her a chance to see what she could do. And she was
loving every minute of it. She situated herself comfortably in front of
him and waited for him to open his eyes, which he did after a minute –
looking at her curiously. She really wanted him to see this…
*What’s she up to?*
“Christ! Buffy!”
He cried out when she took him into her mouth. She sucked him from the
mid-point of the shaft to the head then swirled her tongue around the
tip as she pulled back. Taking it out of her mouth she flicked her
tongue along the sides and then up again. Sucking in just the head, then
out to lick the shaft. She repeated a pattern of leisurely sucks and
licks until his cock was glossy with her saliva and he was panting
raggedly. He was completely at her mercy now and it made her feel
powerful - like a goddess. His reaction to her turned her on terribly.
Her panties were wet through, and she was beginning to long for her own
release. It felt delicious to delay it, to draw everything out until the
last uncontrollable minute. And it was all at her whim.
*Let’s show him what a benevolent goddess I can be.*
And she licked him from his balls to the head of his cock then took him
into her mouth as far as she could. His body arched toward her and he
roared out in pleasure. It was a gorgeous animal howl that sent tingling
shocks to her nipples and a rush of fluid into her panties. Made all the
more gratifying by the knowledge that she was responsible. She was
making him feel like this, could do this to a man. It almost made up for
not being a Slayer anymore.
She was about to go in for the kill when she felt his hands on her
drawing her upwards.
“ Please, Baby…need to touch you. Can’t take it anymore…”
She loved the husky pleading tone in his voice. And she was hungry for
his touch. She crawled up Spike’s body and sat astride him, planting
herself firmly on top of his raging erection. He groaned loudly.
“You wanna touch me?”
She asked seductively. Spike nodded, unable to speak for longing. Buffy
stripped off her shirt and leaned forward to kiss him.
“ Then touch me.”
She whispered against his mouth. He growled and wrapped his hands in her
hair kissing her ravenously. He could feel her everywhere. The hot silk
of her naked body pressed against him from neck to groin. Nothing
between them but a tiny scrap of diaphanous fabric. He pushed up into
her and ground his hard cock into the saturated cloth. She moaned and
sat up to slide suggestively against him, rubbing her wetness along his
full length.
“ Tryin’ ta kill me, Slayer…”
He ground out roughly. Then he pulled her down to him and flipped her
onto her back in one fluid motion.
“ My turn.”
He rasped, burying his face in her neck. He licked over the scars that
others had left, growling possessively. Nipping her playfully but not
drawing blood. There’d be time enough for that when she asked him for
it. Somehow he knew that she would…sooner or later. He licked up her
neck to behind her ear, when he found a small sensitive spot in the
hollow she moaned and shivered, breaking out in little goosebumps.
*Memorizing that one for later.*
He thought, licking a path from her neck to her cleavage. The little
goosebumps followed him all the way down. It was tremendously
gratifying. He secured a nipple in his mouth and flicked it with his
tongue, when he captured the other one between his fingers and rolled it
slowly she gasped and arched into his mouth.
“Like that, Kitten? Just wait…”
He chuckled sinisterly and continued his attentions to her breasts.
Before she had time to think his hand snaked its way over her belly and
into her panties. He slid his middle finger over her slick lips and
parted them to find the hidden rosebud of her clit. With one nipple
still in his mouth he pressed down in gentle circles on her sweet spot,
while stars began to appear in her field of vision. She whimpered
helplessly. The man went right for the money, no messing around.
*That’ll teach her.*
He thought with satisfaction as Buffy panted beneath his hands.
*Who’s in control now, eh?*
He switched to the other nipple and slid his finger deftly within her.
She was the tightest, hottest thing he’d ever felt. And she was so wet
for him, so ready. He ached to be inside of her. But not yet… He had
plans.
*Gonna make her come at least twice before I have my wicked way.*
Spike was grinning from ear to ear, having the time of his life. This
had to be the best day of his entire existence – alive or dead. Here was
Buffy, his golden goddess – spread out before him, panting hotly and
soon to be calling his name. It didn’t get much better. He could
honestly say he had never been happier; with the possible exception of
the moment she told him she loved him.
*Oh yeah. At LEAST twice.*
When he slid another finger in she let out a throaty cry of pleasure and
thrust her hips to meet his hand. He moved down her body to taste her,
the sharp scent of her arousal calling to him. Peeling off her little
panties he set his mouth to work. He spread her lips apart with his
thumbs and buried himself in her saturated sex. It was sheer fucking
Heaven, the taste and smell of her surrounded him. He could almost come
right now without even touching himself.
She slid her legs over his shoulders, her thighs pressed against his
ears as her hands tangled themselves in his hair. How many nights had he
dreamt of this very thing, stroking himself alone in the dark? And this
was even better, so much better, than all his lurid imaginings. He could
never have conjured up the taste of her, both sweet and tart at the same
time, or the musky perfume of her scent. It made him hungrier than ever
for her. He wanted to eat her alive, swallow her whole. He felt ravenous
for the very essence of her self.
He licked her gently exploring every satiny inch of flesh, taking
pleasure in the taste of her. Spreading her wide he bared her clit and
attacked it with his tongue. In only a few minutes Spike felt her thighs
starting to twitch in the tell tale sign of impending orgasm. He smiled
with a deep sense of satisfaction. Wetting his fingers with her slick
juices he slid two inside of her, angling for her g-spot. She shrieked
her pleasure when he found it and clenched her thighs around him.
Fortunately he had no need for air. He flicked her clit with hummingbird
speed and felt her orgasm build until it broke over him like a wave. She
screamed his name as she came, her inner muscles wringing his fingers
with each contraction. He savored the rush of fluid that came with her
climax, drinking her in. It was almost better than blood.
On his knees before her he used his fingers to their best advantage,
drawing out her orgasm into waves of multiples. She rewarded him with a
sharp cry of gratification and wailed again as another climax hit her.
He moved above her to capture her cries of pleasure in his mouth, as if
drinking them in. She kissed him violently and bucked up to meet the
thrusts of his hand. He knew she would be like this, just knew it. She
was as untamed and ferally passionate as he ever hoped for.
She took him by surprise when she grasped his erection and began
stroking him fiercely.
He gasped and moaned her name into her mouth.
“ God, Buffy…”
“ Want you to come, Baby. Want you to feel so good…the way you make me
feel.”
She rasped, panting. Her hand was warm and insistent on his neglected
prick. He couldn’t bring himself to stop her. Didn’t want to. He
responded by pressing his fingers into her g-spot again, caressing it
from the inside. She came again immediately, sobbing with the intensity
of it. She squeezed him with each contraction but never stopped stroking
him.
Buffy pulled away from him suddenly and angled herself down his body to
capture his hard length in her mouth. She wasn’t about to let him go
wanting, not when he’d just given her the most intense pleasure of her
life. She’d never experienced anything remotely close to this. It was
incredible.
She sucked Spike’s beautiful cock all the way into her mouth, enjoying
the taste of him and the satiny texture of his skin. She wanted him to
feel all the pleasure he’d given her and more. Buffy was determined to
give him the orgasm of his unlife. It was the least she could do…
He couldn’t believe the cock sucking he was getting from her. The girl
had natural talent. Her hot wet mouth worked him over feverishly. And
the way she was moaning right now, like she loved it – not like it was
her turn, or she was just trying to get him off as quickly as possible.
She acted like there was nothing else in the world she’d rather be
doing. It was driving him crazy. He wanted to be inside of her so much,
but felt helpless against the onslaught of her wicked mouth and tongue.
There was only one thing that would make this better.
Spike pulled Buffy’s lower body up to him and dropped her artfully onto
his mouth. She gasped as her sensitized flesh came into contact with his
cool wet tongue, but she didn’t stop.
*There. Bloody perfect.*
He captured her clit in his mouth and sucked it gently for a moment
before sliding his whole tongue inside of her. Buffy thought she would
die from the pleasure of it and let out a strangled cry around his cock.
*C’mon, Princess – just one more time for Daddy.*
He lashed her mercilessly, arm wrapped around her waist holding her
tight. Buffy felt her Universe start to spin like a tilt-a-whirl and
doubled her efforts, adding her hand beneath her mouth.
“ Fuck, Buffy don’t stop!”
She devoured him ravenously anticipating his pleasure, wanting it.
Wanting all of him. Needing to taste him and satisfy him in a way that
was almost primal. She took him deeply into her throat and used her
tongue to swirl around the shaft focusing on the head on the up stroke.
She felt his whole body stiffen as his orgasm came on and she clamped
down sucking for all she was worth. Spike shouted out her name and came
in her mouth with an unearthly howl. It was the sexiest thing she’d ever
heard. She expected him to stop pleasuring her then, but he didn’t. He
covered her sensitive clit with his mouth and licked it gently until she
joined him in that blissful chaos, moaning his name as she drank in the
last of him.
Finally they rolled apart, covered in each other’s sweat and fluids and
very deeply satisfied.
For the moment.
** Wow. Was it good for you too? *Smokes cigarette* You must admit I do
deliver - a nice, long, hard...chapter, and no cliffies. Now that you
love me again, won't you please go vote for my fic at the Lovebite
awards? *Bats eyes* It's up for Best Fluff and Most Original Storyline.
Go to: http://www.lovebite-network.info/awards/
Winning would make me ever so happy - I would write faster and more and
be bound to create really happy endings and lots more smut.
*Bribe,bribe*
Pretty please with whip cream and naked Spike on top?
*Licks and Spanks to All* Rosie xoxoxoxox**
**Sorry 'bout the wait, Guys. My new job is eating my life. I'll be
updating once a week normally. Meanwhile - here's some fluff, some
Spuff, a little light comedy and just a dash of angst. Mmmm, tasty!
Enjoy :) **
Chapter Thirty One ~ Wicked Game
“World is on fire, no one can save me but you.
Strange word desire, makes foolish people do.
I never dreamed that I’d love somebody like you.
No I never dreamed that I’d lose somebody like you.
And I don’t wanna fall in love.
No, I don’t wanna fall in love – with you.
What a wicked game to play to make me feel this way.
What a wicked thing to do to make me dream of you…”
~ Chris Isaac
They lay back panting and recovering as the afterglow set in. He pulled
her from her spot at the foot of the bed and tucked her neatly beside
him.
“ That was…” Buffy trailed off, unable to find the words.
“ …fucking amazing.” Spike finished grinning at her. “ I knew it’d be
that way with you, Pet.”
She smiled shyly at him.
“ You did?”
“ Bloody right I did. Just didn’t know how amazing.”
She answered his giant grin with one of her own.
“ It was pretty 'how'.”
She turned towards him nestling herself into his side comfortably.
“ Yeah. An’ we didn’t even get to the main course yet.”
He kissed the top of her head and played idly with the silky strands of
her hair.
“ We didn’t?”
“ Nah. That was just the hors d'oeuvres. WET the appetite – so to
speak.”
He waggled a roguish eyebrow her way, making her giggle.
“ And the dessert?”
She asked coyly. He smirked leaning over her.
“ You are the dessert, Love. And I’ve got half a mind to get right to
it…”
“ Really now?”
Her tone was a saucy challenge he accepted with a kiss.
“ Definitely.”
He went from ear to neck to thigh in a fluid string of kisses and licks.
Before she could blink he was between her legs smiling in anticipation.
“ Dessert looks yummy, I must say.”
“ Really? You …like the way it looks?”
She was shy and hesitant; no one had ever really looked at her there
before.
“ It’s beautiful, like every part of you.” He said sincerely then
smiled. “ And tasty too.” And he bent his head to his work, grinning.
Somewhere upon her third multiple orgasm she grabbed him by his ears and
dragged him up to her.
“ C’mere you.” She growled, kissing him ravenously.
She could taste herself on his lips and found she didn’t care. It was
somehow erotic and blended in with the million other sensory experiences
she was having at the moment. Buffy wrapped her legs around her lover
and ground her wet delicious heat against him. Spike shuddered at the
sensation of her slick sex sliding against his erection. He pinned her
to the bed with his hips, maneuvering his body until his head was poised
against her opening.
“ This what you want, Pet?”
“ God…” she gasped, more than ready. “Want you, Spike. Want you so
much…”
The sound of his name, said in her voice so husky with desire, was
almost more than he could take. He bent down to kiss her thoroughly,
then raised himself up enough to grasp his cock to slide it home. Such a
perfect moment, all he had ever wanted was happening right now. He had a
second to thank whoever had arranged it before
Someone started knocking on his door.
Loudly.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
“ Balls!” He cursed angrily under his breath. “ Just ignore it, Love.
They’ll go away.”
Buffy nodded, wide eyed - anticipating his next motion. Cock still in
hand he moved to enter her again.
This time the knocking was a pounding that became a crash as the crypt
door was kicked open.
“ Sweet bleeding CHRIST!” he roared, rolling off of his love. He grabbed
for his pants tangled on the floor, furious at this interruption. “ Of
all POSSIBLE fucking moments…” Whoever it was, was about to die a swift
and bloody death. “ Stay here,Pet. I’ll be right back.”
She nodded and pulled the covers up around her demurely. He just hated
to see her cover up. Spike looked at her longingly, holding back a
whimper of frustration. Someone was REALLY going to pay for that. He
pulled his t-shirt off the floor and made for the ladder. God, his shirt
still smelled of her – it was intoxicating. His erection throbbed in
response to her scent. He growled and reached for the first rung
thinking;
*Blood. Death. Dismemberment.*
Just then from the upper level they heard;
“ Spike?”
He exchanged a look of wide-eyed fear with Buffy, along with a
simultaneous thought:
*Faith.*
Somehow they’d both managed to completely forget she existed.
“ Shite!” He cursed quietly, crossing the room to her side. “ Get
dressed. Hide in the tunnel. I’ll get rid of her…”
Buffy gathered her clothes with lightning speed as Spike rushed for the
ladder.
“ Yo! Dead Boy.” Faith’s voice was closer.
They had time to share a single look of regret before Buffy made a dash
for the tunnels.
“ I’m coming, Woman. Don’t get yer knickers in a twist.”
He entered the upper level nonchalantly, stretching as if having just
awoken. Faith cocked an eyebrow at him.
“ And good mornin’ to you, Prince Charming.”
Spike sauntered over to the couch and sat down casually, digging in the
pockets of his discarded coat for his cigarettes and lighter.
“ Whaddaya expect, Faith? Vampire remember?” he lit a smoke and sat back
comfortably, taking a drag. “ It’s the middle of the bleedin’ night for
me.”
“ Well you’d still be sleepin’ all comfy if you woulda come over last
night.” She flopped down on the opposite end of the couch, looking
pouty.
Shite. He’d completely forgotten. He was supposed to meet her after Dawn
went to sleep.
“ Sorry, Babe. Took a nap, turned into sort of an all-nighter.” He
covered coolly.
She smiled and scooted up next to him.
“ That’s okay, Baby…” she purred, “You can make it up to me.” She kissed
his neck and slid a seductive hand up his thigh. “Right now.”
Spike had just enough time to appreciate the true horror of that idea.
Him shaggin’ Faith after a marathon foreplay session with Buffy - all
with Buffy hiding in the tunnels just close enough to hear the whole
thing. Bloody hell. His formerly evil self would’ve appreciated it
immensely.
He placed a hand on top of hers to stop her roving.
“ C’mon, Pet…”
He patted it in a conciliatory way and held it in his own.
“ What’s the big?” She asked leaning in to lick his neck in just the
right way.
Damn but that girl knew all his buttons. He released her hand, big
mistake he found out as it began wandering again.
“ Pet…” He warned.
“ I know you want to…” she bit his earlobe sharply, making him gasp. “ I
can FEEL it.” And she grabbed the erection that rightfully belonged to
Buffy firmly in her hand. He squeaked in a very unmanful way and pulled
her hand away.
“ Sorry, Babe – just a bit knackered.” He covered lamely.
“ Still?” Faith raised her eyebrow at him.
“ Just a bit…probably from sleepin’ too much. I’ll be fine after a
shower an a nice cuppa.”
“ You sure? Might wake ya up a little.” She smiled saucily at him.
“ Rain check?” he did his best to smile sincerely.
“ Alright but yer missin’ out.” She shrugged.
“ Don’t I know it.” He agreed, nodding just a little too vigorously.
“ Make it up to me later?” She shot him her sexiest smile.
“ 'Course I will.”
“ Guess I’ll leave ya to it then.” She rose and started for the door.
“ Thanks, Babe.” He smiled at her gratefully.
“ Sure. See you after sundown.”
“ Right.” And he closed the door behind her thankful for the reprieve.
Outside the crypt she paused, thinking.
Funny, but not once in there did he call her “Love”.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Spike laid his head against the smooth oak of the door with a profound
sigh of relief.
*Shite, that was close.*
His emotions were in a confused tangle at the moment – on the one hand
he was over the moon about Buffy. She loved him, she’d said the ACTUAL
words! And he was highly aroused by her sheer presence, not to mention
the hours of delight they’d whiled away this very morning. He found he
wanted her more than ever, in point of fact.
But then there were the insane complications that went along with this
whole package. She could be wrenched away from him at any time by God
knows what powers or magicks. Or she could actually choose to leave for
Dawn’s sake, or her poor sick Mum’s - if anyone could ever figure out
how to get her home that is. That thought sent a bolt of pain through
his unbeating heart. He didn’t know how on earth he could possibly do
without her now - he was so terribly,agonizingly in love with her.
Somehow, before - he’d managed to keep it in check. It was easier when
he believed he could never, ever have her. It never went away, but it
was manageable. But now that he’d had her in his arms – in his very bed
– he couldn’t even begin to imagine how he’d ever let her go. And if all
that weren’t enough to send a fella’s head spinnin’ – there was Faith.
He was experiencing a feeling he wasn’t at all accustomed to. It took
him a bit to figure out what it was. Guilt. Spike actually felt guilty
about something.
*Weird that.*
He didn’t want to hurt her. After all her only crime was not being
Buffy. There was simply nothing to be done about it – she couldn’t help
that she wasn’t "The One". And she couldn’t be held responsible for his
inability to love anyone else. He'd simply have to break it off, as
gently as he could. And all without letting her know that Buffy was
involved in any way. He didn’t even want to think about what she'd do if
she found out.
*Blood, death, dismemberment…*
But the upside of it all was that he would have Buffy then, free and
clear.
*At least for a while...*
He pushed the thought away, frowning. Can’t think like that. Can’t let
anything get in the way of this happiness. So it would be fleeting –
wasn’t it always? Wasn’t that all the more reason to enjoy its full
measure now? Spike was determined not to waste a moment of it.
*Speaking of which…*
Someone was waiting to share that happiness, and all the pleasures it
entailed. He smiled happily and made for the lower level ladder.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
He found Buffy waiting just inside the tunnel entrance beside his
bedroom, distressingly fully clothed.
*Well, we’ll just have to remedy that won’t we?*
He smiled lasciviously at her, mind full of all the things he planned on
doing to her the rest of the day. It was her worried frown that shook
him from his thoughts.
“ That was too close, Spike.”
He smiled at her slyly and wrapped his arms around her.
“ Yeah, but ya gotta admit the sneakin’ around bit’s exciting.”
She gave him an amused smile of her own.
“ Maybe…a little.”
He kissed her then and pulled her easily up into his arms. Her legs
wrapped around his waist quite naturally, as if they had done this very
thing a thousand times. How well they fit together was lost on neither
of them. Without breaking their kiss Spike carried her back to his bed,
right where she belonged. Wanting to make up for the time he’d lost this
morning he quickly began undressing her.
“ Spike…Sweetie…Do you have important things to do today?”
She asked between kisses, concerned.
“ Yep.” He nodded vigorously. “ And they all involve you and this bed.
And possibly the couch.” He kissed her. “The floor.” He kissed her
again. “A crypt or two and the shower.” He kissed her a third time for
good measure and smiled with great satisfaction.
“ Ooooo, a shower.” She paused and looked at him quizzically. “Wait. You
have a shower?”
“ Yeah. How d’ya think I stay this good looking and well groomed? It
takes work ya know.” He huffed indignantly.
“ I guess I never really thought about it. But a shower sounds nice.”
She kissed him back and settled her half-clothed body comfortably
against his. He grinned down at her and kissed the top of her head with
affection.
“ Oh, it will be with you in it. I could while away a happy hour just
soaping you up, Love.” He waggled his eyebrows at her suggestively
“Wanna take one now?”
Buffy caught the look and wrinkled her nose at him in mock reproach.
“ Not if you’re just gonna make me all dirty again. I believe someone
mentioned the floor? Although if you have a bathtub in there…”
His brain filled instantly with images of her naked, soapy body sliding
through his hands and gliding against his as they frolicked in a large
claw foot tub.
*My kingdom for a bathtub…*
“ No, damn it all. But I’ll take you to the nicest hotel in town this
very minute and spend the rest of the day washing your hair and feeding
you room service.”
“ Oooo, spoilage. Me likey.”
She sighed happily and snuggled against his chest.
“ Whatever my girl desires she shall have.”
He stroked the smooth silk of her hair lovingly.
“ You’re gonna ruin me for all other men you know.”
She said matter-of-factly, pulling back to look at him.
“ That’s the plan, Princess. That’s the plan.” He leaned down and kissed
her deeply “Wait – WHAT other men?”
Buffy giggled at him and slid from his grasp.
“ Wouldn’t you like to know?”
She teased moving just out of his reach.
“ Oh, yer in for it now, Kitten.”
“ Am I?” She asked coquettishly.
“Bloody right you are.” And he lunged for her across the bed.
Buffy shrieked happily and ran in the other direction, but Spike caught
her as she rounded the far corner of the mahogany footboard. Pulling her
down to him with a growl he pinned her on the mattress and attacked her
neck with nibbling kisses.
“ Let’s see who’s ticklish now, eh?”
And he proceeded to dig his fingers into her sides and belly until she
broke down in a fit of hysterical giggles. As a final touch he finished
unbuttoning her shirt and zerberted her belly button with unrestrained
glee. Buffy laughed with delight at this silly, tender gesture and
pulled him up to lie next to her. He snuggled in with a sigh of
contentment and realized that he had never been so happy in all his
existence. Ever.
In his mind’s eye endless days stretched out before them, all like this.
Filled with laughing kisses, constant lovemaking and a happiness so
acute it was almost painful. It made him want to cry…. Because it seemed
to be almost within his reach. Almost. He had it now in the palm of his
hand.
But for how long?
** Angst,angst,angst... It'll lighten up a bit (and get WAY smuttier)
next chapter. I know, I know - I'm such a dirty girl. Blame my muse -
he's terribly naughty, and I just can't seem to control him. Like right
now - he's all shirtless and pale and pretty...*drools* Gotta go - the
muse calls :D
*snuggles of luv* Rosie xoxoxox**
** I must preface this with a disclaimer: I do not, in any way, speak
French. (Except for an extremely naughty phrase or two I picked up from
my highschool boyfriend...but I digress) I do however, love this fucking
song, and felt compelled to include it (read the chappie and you'll know
why.) I did my level best to find accurate spellings for the words and a
decent English translation for the lyric - which you'll find at the end.
In conclusion if you are French, or merely a snotty intellectual type -
DO NOT write me letters. I don't care. I tried, and am satisfied. That
is all.
PS - If you've never heard this song before (you heathen) go forth and
download it now - I command you... Seriously, you'll be glad ya did. It
is muy caliente... **
Chapter Thirty Two ~ Hungry For You ( j'aurais toujours faim de toi)
“ Rien de dormier cette nuit
Je veux de toi
Jusque'a` ce que je sois sec
Mais nos corps sont tout mouille's
Comple'tement couvert de sueur
Nous nous noyons dans la mare'e
Je n'ai aucun de'sir
Tu as ravage' mon coeur
Et mois j'ai bu ton sang
No matter what I do
I’m still hungry for you.
No matter what I do
I’m still hungry for you…”
~ The Police*
Aphrodite smiled with deep satisfaction at the freshly mated pair as
Eros goggled in awe at her side.
It was precisely how she said it would be. Once faced with the true
reality of a “normal life” the Slayer had gone running from it - right
into the arms of her intended. This only proved his theory that the
Slayer and vampire were meant to be - in any Universe. Eros might just
make it a point to see that it was so… It certainly seemed to please the
Powers That Be, who were practically humming with approval.
His only question was how this muddle was going to work itself out. Was
the Slayer to be forever trapped here – and what of the other, the one
that actually belonged here? And the Key? Was it to go unprotected? He
sighed, head swimming. His mother had set machinations in motion so
complex that it tied his brain in knots trying to make sense of it all.
He was far outclassed by the goddess who now stood at his side, quietly
gloating.
*Big guns indeed.*
And so much for a simple love match - when he’d been drawn to the
vampire’s brightly burning heartlight he had no idea it was at the
behest of the Powers. Manipulating bastards that they were… Though he
supposed it was all for the best possible cause. Aphrodite had given him
a brief glimpse of the battle to come: a legion of primordial vampires,
Sunnydale a ruined crater in the earth, and The First’s true face. He
shuddered at the memory.
His final vision had been the death of the vampire. Burnt to ash for the
chance to be a true champion, to be worthy at last of her love - yet not
even accepting it in his final moments, her whispered “I love you” met
with denial. He could not help his tears then. Such a waste of Love!
Such a waste of a sparkling soul – the initial glimmers of which drew
him to this earthly plane in the beginning.
Eros was more determined than ever to see this through.
However long it took – the vampire and Slayer would be as one…
He would make sure of it.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Buffy and Spike lay side by side in dozy contentment, happy to simply be
together for the moment. It had been a long journey to get to this place
and it was such a new and fragile thing between them yet. They both knew
it could be over in the blink of an eye – Buffy whisked away to her own
world, with neither of them able to have a say in the matter. Privately
Spike thought the PTB had a bloody helluva lot to answer for.
*Wankers. If only I could get my hands on one or two of ‘em…*
He smiled sinisterly to himself at the thought.
*They better pray I never make it up there.*
Buffy caught his evil smirk and raised a questioning eyebrow his way.
“ I know that look. That’s your “Up to No Good’ look.”
“ Who? Me?” He played innocent. “I’m just lyin’ here mindin’ my own
business.”
She rose up on one elbow, resting her head in her hand.
“ Uh huh. Tell me another one, Spikey.”
He looked taken aback.
“ Hey, don’t go callin’ me that now. Harm used ta -”
“ Would you prefer Blondie Bear?”
She batted her eyelashes at him ingenuously.
He gave her a low growl.
“ Oh you are just ASKIN' for trouble, Princess.”
She sat up and put her hands on her knees.
“ Ya think so?” she asked in a mock-serious tone.
He nodded, a dangerous glint in his eye.
“ Why is that…Peaches?”
He sat up, indignant.
“Oi! Now that one was below the belt.”
She nodded agreeably, slipping quickly from the bed.
“Wasn’t it just?”
“ That’s it. Time to pay the piper.”
He leapt across the bed and grabbed her, but she managed to wiggle her
way out of his grasp. With enhanced Slayer speed she made a dash for the
ladder, but he was too quick for her. He threw her over his shoulder and
carried her back to the large four-poster.
“ Someone needs to be taught her manners.”
And he dumped her unceremoniously onto the mattress. Spike settled
himself down on the edge of the bed comfortably and hauled her up over
his knee before she could get away again.
“ What’re you up to?”
She asked suspiciously.
“ Teaching you not to play with fire.”
Buffy smiled at him winningly.
“ But I like fire. Fire pretty.”
He cocked his eyebrow at her.
The first swat caught her off guard.
“ Hey, Spike – not funny!”
“ Maybe not for you…”
He smacked her again on the other cheek.
“ Ow!”
“ What’s a matter, Slayer? Can’t take it?”
“ Oh, you are so gonna get it when-”
Smack!
“ HEY!”
He was grinning from ear to ear.
“ Spike …” her voice held a warning tone he cheerfully ignored,
delivering yet another well placed slap to her lovely bum. Buffy began
squirming madly in his grasp, but he wasn’t about to let her get away -
he was having entirely too much fun. “ You’d…better…let me…go.”
She threatened him between wriggles.
“ Now what kind of man would I be ignorin’ your education like that?”
Whap!
Buffy was flushed and panting now as she struggled vainly to free
herself from his iron grip. Spike thought she’d never looked lovelier.
Her hair was mussed, her chest was heaving and she was covered in a
light sheen of perspiration – no wonder he was hard. Her eyes widened
when she felt his erection poking her in the belly.
“ You gianormous perv ! You’re getting off on this!”
He chuckled lasciviously at that and slid his hand in a seductive caress
over her upturned ass.
“ How could I not be?”
His hands continued to wander over her vulnerable self, one making its
way into her open shirt. He palmed a perfect peach breast and skated his
thumb over her already hardened nipple. Buffy bit down on her lower lip
to contain her groan.
“ ‘Sides – ‘M not the only one now am I?”
She closed her mouth with an obstinate snap.
*So not giving him the satisfaction.*
Spike chuckled to himself. He adored that stubborn streak – made it so
much fun to tame her. His questing hand found its way inside her bra
cupping her sweet breast, flesh to flesh.
Buffy inhaled sharply through her nose; mouth intractably sealed against
her whimper of enjoyment. He rolled her nipple between thumb and
forefinger while his other hand made its way back to her pert behind;
forced into the air by the position she was in. He circled each cheek in
turn with a slow teasing stroke and just as she was relaxing into his
touch –
Spank!
“Ow! What-”
And he gave her nipple a sharp tweak, this time she couldn’t contain the
breathless moan that escaped her.
Back to slow caresses, alternating with fondling her breasts and nipples
and just when she was lost to his seduction - a sharp, tingling smack.
He did it again and again, until she was dizzy with sensation.
Buffy was on fire, her body a confused tangle of feelings, pain and
pleasure blurring into each other until she couldn’t tell the difference
and didn’t care. When he slid his hand between her damp thighs she
couldn’t keep herself from arching into it..
“Oh God…”
Was all she could manage at the moment.
“ Like that, Kitten?” He rubbed her forcefully through her jeans until
she cried out. “ Knew you did.” His voice was a low growl in her ear,
making her shudder. He pulled back for a stinging slap and she cried out
again.
Christ, she was wet. He could feel her arousal soaking through her jeans
and the scent of it hung in the air like the world’s most intoxicating
perfume. He wanted nothing more than to tear her clothes from her body
and bury himself to the hilt inside her. But he was determined to break
her yet. The only question was whether he would snap before she did. He
never could control himself when it came to Buffy.
“You like it don’t you, Baby?” She bit her lip, not quite ready to give
in yet. Spike couldn’t help but smile at her obstinacy. He went back to
working her breasts over, enjoying the weight of them filling his hand.
He took each nipple one at a time, alternating teasing caresses and
sharp tweaks until she was whimpering behind her gritted teeth. And just
when he felt she’d had all she could take, he aimed a solid smack low on
her ass, just up against her sensitized sex. She rewarded him with a
throaty moan of pleasure that made his dick throb inside his jeans.
She was almost there.
Spike grinned wolfishly, knowing he was close to her sweet surrender. It
was going to be so very delicious when she did. He couldn’t say he
wasn’t enjoying having the upper hand with Buffy for a change. So rarely
did he have this kind of power over her. It seemed he was always the one
on his knees…
*Not for long.*
He slipped his hands in between her thighs again and stroked along the
center seam of her jeans. He used the material to its best advantage
pressing it into her cleft and rubbing it against her clit.
“ Know you like it, Kitten.”
His voice was a seductive purr.
“ Know you want it.”
He increased the pressure and ground down in concentric circles.
“ Just give in. Tell Daddy what you like…”
He added fingers to her nipples
“… What you want.”
Buffy shuddered helplessly under his hands, the combination of his
hypnotic voice and talented hands driving her to the brink of orgasm,
even through her clothes.
*What has he done to me?*
“ Then I’ll make it all better.”
He felt her body tense, she was building up to a climax already. He
upped his pace.
“Give you just what you need.”
He felt her tremble on the precipice – the right touch from him would
send her over. So he pulled his hand from between her damp and shivering
thighs to give her one last spank.
Smack!
Right between her spread legs. He added a few more for effect across her
sweetly upturned ass. (How could he resist?) Listening with delight to
the animal grunts and groans each strike produced. She was a whimpering
mass of need by the time he was done with her. She had no thought but to
end her torment and gain relief. Her nerves were buzzing with pent up
arousal. She pushed back into his hand to try to gain some friction. So
when he asked her again;
“You like it don’t you, Buffy? Like it just as much as I do…”
She almost sobbed from the overwhelming sensations flooding her.
“ Yes…” Was a strangled whisper, her acquiescence barely audible.
But Spike heard her all the same.
With a hungry growl of satisfaction he pulled her upright and onto his
lap in one swift movement. Flush to his chest, she was facing away from
him, her breasts and sex easily accessible to his roving hands. Under
her open shirt he effortlessly unhooked her bra. Taking her breasts in
both hands he ground himself up into her sultry heat.
“ This what you want, Pet?”
She could do little more than whimper.
His hands found their way to the clasp of her low cut jeans and
unbuttoned her with a casual flick. She gasped as his cool fingers came
into contact with her hot, sensitive flesh.
“ So wet for me, Baby.”
He murmured into her ear. He leaned her forward, forcing her legs wide
and slid his hand down into her jeans, fingers entering her before she
could catch her breath. And if this wasn’t enough to put her senses on
overload, his other hand came up to play with her already tender
nipples.
“ No, Spike…can’t…” She wavered, overwhelmed.
“ Shhh, Baby. Gonna make it so good for you.”
He thumbed her clit then, playing her like his favorite musical
instrument. Knowing just what string to pluck to get the note he wanted.
*Too much, too much!*
She couldn’t take it. She was so revved up from the spanking and
touching and now his hands seemed to be everywhere at once. She’d lost
all control over herself and the situation and now she was far too gone
to regain it. Spike spun her to face him then, settling her on his lap
again before he renewed his assault. He slid three fingers inside her,
filling her, stretching her – while he studied her face with hungry
intent, devouring her look of abandoned pleasure.
Fuck. She was gonna come. Two minutes with just his hands and she was
going to come. Was that even physically possible? Apparently it was – as
his thumb ground down on her again she felt her body let go like a roman
candle on a hot July night.
“ God! Spike… Coming…”
And she rode her orgasm out, his fingers thrusting deep to find that
sweet spot inside that sent her off again… and again. He pulled her
tight to him and kissed her as she spasmed around his hand.
She was a total wreck. Sweating, clothes askew, bra dangling from one
arm – traces of mascara under her eyes and panting like a dog.
He had never wanted her more.
Spike drove his fingers into her one last time as he kissed her
greedily. He wanted every ounce of her pleasure, every drop – all for
himself. He leaned in to capture a rosy nipple in his mouth. Buffy gave
a guttural cry and arched her back, fingers digging painfully into his
shoulders as she bucked against him. She was coming again – and he was
this close to joining her. The way she was riding him right now, the
primal look of gratification on her face – knowing it was him making her
feel that way. She wouldn’t even have to touch him – if she just said
his name like that one more time …
Buffy pushed his hand away, unable to take even one second more of his
attentions. She surprised him by shoving him back onto the bed with a
low, animal growl - his shirt was rucked up around his neck and half way
off before he could think what was happening. When it caught on one arm
she simply tore it free and threw it to the floor. She pinned his wrists
to the bed and kissed him fiercely, biting his lip and nipping his jaw
as she made her way down his torso. He felt the scrape of her teeth
against his neck and struggled for control of his over-stimulated body.
And then she bit him,
REALLY bit him.
Thank God it was only his shoulder, or it would’ve been all over. As it
was, he couldn’t contain the roar that escaped him or keep himself from
grinding into her roughly. He was only just containing his demon at the
moment. It wanted out and it wanted Buffy – right the fuck now. Spike
clamped down internally, keeping the bastard barely in check. At least
it gave him a distraction from wanting to come in his pants.
Buffy gave a sharp bite to his pectoral muscle and covered his nipple
with her mouth. He moved to pull her up to him tangling his hand in her
hair, but she pushed it down on to the bed, pinning him there.
Fuck, but she was turning him on.
He never knew she could be like this – hoped maybe, but he’d never had
occasion to see it. Now he was getting the floorshow, and loving every
minute. Buffy nipped at his other nipple and gave it a thorough
tonguing. She sucked it into her mouth and then licked her way down his
stomach while he groaned. She paused to dip her tongue into his navel
making his hips jump involuntarily. Spike was thisfar from begging her
to do…well, anything really. Touch him just a little, lick him, suck him
– anything, everything. Just do it soon. She stopped at the fly of his
black jeans, nuzzling his stomach.
“ You like it, don’t you, Baby?”
*Shit.*
He was in serious trouble.
*"Although you have had enough tonight
I want you until I am satisfied
Our bodies are all wet
Completely covered with sweat
We are drowning in its pool
I still desire you
You ravish my heart
I drink your blood
No matter what I do
I'm still hungry for you…"
English Translation by Bashir at Stingetc.com
** Okay, is it me or is this story just getting pornier and pornier? I
like the smut what can I say? ;p And apparently some of you like it too
'cause I'm up for 3 (count 'em) more awards.
One (or several) of you lovely people have nominated me for Tabula
Rasa/Best AU, Becoming/Best WIP and Something Blue/Funniest,Best Fluff
at the Breathless Awards.
I thank you sincerely and deeply (and possibly with tongue). I'm tickled
pink to be so well thought of by my esteemed readers and fellow writers.
If you'd like to help me win (and we all know what winning does for my
writing he he) please go vote/nominate me at:
http://www.geocities.com/breathlessones/BreathlessAwardsHome.html
Deeply feelin' the love tonight, my darlings...
*SMOOCH!* Rosie xoxoxox **
** Here ya go, Kiddies - a nice, long, juicy chapter just for you.
Sorry about the wait, but I actually had to do some research for this
one. Special thanks to the Buffy Trivia Guide site for the names of the
monks and knights. And Templar History.com for information on the
Knights of Templar. Go forth and enjoy the fruits of my labor..**
Chapter Thirty Three ~ Bedroom Dancing
“ I said if you wanna do the tango then we’re gonna need a ballroom.
So she took me by the hand and led me to her bedroom.
And then she did it, stripped me half naked, and told me that her body
was sacred.
She said I could take it, if I danced with her – but somehow I knew that
she was an Indian giver.
I said what about tomorrow? She said what about tonight? She said trust
me, Baby it’ll be alright.
And so we danced and danced and danced and danced all night…”
~ Day One
He opened his eyes to see her smiling at him sinisterly.
*Payback’s a bitch.*
He thought, with no small measure of amusement. He should’ve known she
wasn’t gonna let him just GET AWAY with his earlier performance - Buffy
never let anything go. She was definitely going to make him suffer. Many
hours of potential torment awaited him. Spike wasn’t sure if he should
laugh or cry - she might just kill him this time. Either his prick would
explode or he would simply expire from sheer frustration.
She unbuttoned his jeans, leaving the zipper up and then casually licked
the flesh she’d just exposed, carefully avoiding the half inch of cock
sticking out of his waistband.
Yup. She was definitely going to kill him.
He’d already worked himself into an agonized state of arousal over the
course of the morning. Between being interrupted earlier and the little
S&M session he’d just had with her he was more than ready for release.
Didn’t look like she had any intention of letting him have it though.
Not any time soon anyway – too busy tormenting him with her tongue at
the moment.
Buffy occupied herself with the flat plane of his stomach, taking her
time with leisurely licks and nibbles. She stopped at his navel once
more for a taste and then made her way to his hipbones. She licked each
curve of muscle in the hollow that lead to his groin making him groan
pitifully. She ignored him of course and kept right on with what she was
doing, eventually making her way back to his chest. She settled on his
left nipple, gently taking it in her mouth and sucking it.
Spike was wholly unprepared for the sharp bite that followed. He snarled
in frustrated pleasure, eyes flashing yellow. One more like that and all
his vows of waiting til SHE asked to be bitten would be bloody out the
window. He gave her a low growl of warning and she grinned back at him
mischievously.
“ What’s a matter, Big Bad? Can’t take it?”
“ Oh, you ARE playing with fire, Kitten.”
“ I told you, I like fire.”
She straddled him then, grinding against his erection with intent.
“ Fire pretty.”
And she kissed him slowly and deeply until his head was swimming and he
was drowning in her once again.
Gently she parted from him to sit upright, straddling his hips – the
sultry heat of her burning him through his jeans. With agonizing care
she removed her shirt and tossed it and her dangling bra to the floor,
leaving her smooth golden torso naked to his gaze. She was still wearing
her jeans, though they were unbuttoned and partially unzipped - barely
showing the top of her neatly trimmed chestnut curls. He found the
effect incredibly devastating.
She lowered herself to him again, warm meeting cool, flesh to flesh. Her
perfect breasts flush against his chest as she nuzzled his neck, licked
his collar bone and nibbled his earlobe.
Surely he would die soon.
This torment couldn’t go on forever…
Buffy rose up to kiss him, sucking his lower lip into her mouth and
finally biting it. He couldn’t suppress the small moan that escaped him,
making her smile wickedly. With infinite slowness she slid down his
body, dragging her hard nipples down his chest and stomach, scalding him
with her body heat. When she got to his groin she paused and breathed
with purpose over the solid bulge in his pants.
“ God, Buffy…yer killin’ me, Love.”
She just smirked at him and moved to unzip his jeans.
He was so hard right now that it hurt. Every nerve was alive and
sensitized, eager for her slightest touch. When she finally unzipped him
his cock sprang free with a small bounce, as if it resented being
confined. Spike was practically shaking with pent up desire. She
wouldn’t have to ask him to beg if she waited much longer…
Buffy settled herself comfortably between his legs, grinning with evil
intent. A line from a favorite movie occurred to him then;
*I see you shiver with anticipation…*
When she clutched him in her hot little hand it was almost enough to
make him come right there.
*Bloody Ponce.*
He held on by the barest thread, knowing her next move could be his
undoing.
Resting casually on her elbows she played with him. Toyed with his cock
like she didn’t have a care in the world - as if he weren’t about to
shred the sheets in frustration. She’d give it a few strokes then stop
and swirl her thumb over the head. Then she’d squeeze him firmly until
he groaned and then move on to something else, never staying in one
place too long.
Spike was quite certain he was in Hell.
As good as her attentions felt they did nothing to relieve the tension
that had now grown to Vesuvian proportions inside him. His balls were
going to detonate any minute now, he was sure of it.
When he felt her tongue on him at last he almost jumped out of his skin.
Buffy gifted him with a series of torturous licks, circling the head and
up and down the shaft. Using the lightest of strokes she tormented him
with her little pink tongue until he thought he would go mad on the
spot.
*Can’t take it…*
“Buffy, Baby…please…”
She smiled at him like the cat that ate the cream, pleased with herself.
At the moment he couldn’t care less, just as long as she touched him…
Finally, finally she took his painfully throbbing erection into her
mouth. He nearly lost it then, it took every ounce of self-control he
possessed to keep himself in check. He tried picturing unsexy things.
Chaos demons dripping with goo. Fyarl snot. The weeping sores of a
Balrog. It wasn’t doing much good…
*Xander in a tutu.*
There, all better. If that didn’t distract him, nothing would. Best not
to think about it too much though. If he went completely soft, Buffy
might get the wrong idea. Though when she sucked him all the way to the
back of her throat he figured there wasn’t much danger in that.
She pulled him out of her mouth slowly, skating her tongue along the
underside the whole way. When she got to the head she scraped it
purposefully with her teeth. The pleasure-pain of it did nothing to
placate his demon, which had been screaming at him for the past hour.
But that wasn’t the worst thing. That wasn’t the thing that was driving
him slowly out of his mind at the moment. Oh no.
It was the look on her face.
She looked sexy and disheveled and fully in charge of herself – not to
mention him. She looked like there was nothing on earth she’d rather be
doing than sucking his cock. Like it was the best thing she’d ever
tasted and she would gladly spend all night between his legs. He knew
exactly how she felt.
And it was killing him.
She loved him and she wanted him – as deeply and ravenously as he wanted
her. The knowledge burned him almost as much as the feel of her hot, wet
mouth devouring him. She didn’t have to break him, he was already her
willing slave. And if she wanted him to beg, he would without pride or
pain. He would give her anything and everything she wanted.
Because he just couldn’t help himself.
He had been hers body and soul from the moment he realized he was in
love with her. It was simply his nature; to give all to the woman he
loved. He didn’t know how to hold back or to half-ass it - Spike was an
all-or-nothing kinda guy. And William would settle for nothing less than
full devotion.
*Doomed from the start you were.*
He thought ruefully, reaching out to stroke the glossy crown of her
head.
Still, he wouldn’t trade it for anything, not a moment. Even if it meant
he might lose her someday soon. The little bit he’d experienced with her
was the best he’d ever had. She was worth every moment of pain and
suffering he might have to endure - she’d far surpassed his dreams
already …
Buffy was as beautiful close up as she was from afar, she radiated
light. She made him laugh, she made him weep – and she could kick his
ass, or at least give him a good run for his money. And if all that
weren’t enough she was wildly passionate in ways he never dared hope.
She met him stroke for stroke
*No pun intended.*
Everywhere he wanted to go, everything he wanted to do – she was
willing. This gorgeous, deadly girl was the most amazing sexual
experience of his life. And they hadn’t even actually had sex yet. And
God, if they ever got ‘round to it … he’d probably burst into flames.
*To be inside all that heat…*
He cut the thought off hastily. He couldn’t afford any naughty thinking
right now.
It was difficult enough trying to distract himself from her feverish
mouth…
She sucked him hard then, cheeks hollowing on the way up. All thought
left his brain abruptly. Buffy locked eyes with him, hypnotic smoky jade
holding his gaze while she worked him over. He was captivated. She added
her hand, twisting slightly on the up stroke and he moaned helplessly,
completely under her power now.
Spike was losing the battle for mastery over his body; she was simply
too much for him. He couldn’t fight the deadly onslaught of her wicked
mouth. All too soon he felt his climax building to the breaking point.
Always the gentleman, he warned her between pants;
“ Can’t…hold back… much longer, Pet…”
He thought she might stop then, pull back or perhaps use only her hand,
but there was no hesitance in her movements. If anything she became more
vigorous, using her hand and mouth in perfect unison. He could no more
resist their motion than the tides could resist the moon. Before he knew
it he was sucked into the undertow and drowning with the force of the
orgasm that broke over him.
Spike came with a primordial howl, his demon released at last – eyes
glinting yellow, deadly fangs extended. Buffy shivered in reaction,
inexplicably aroused by the display. It stirred something deep inside
her she was barely aware of; her Slayer nature responding to the call of
its true mate.
The demon that lay at the heart of her being rejoiced in finding her
counterpart at last. All this time she had been waiting for him,
discarding the worthless suitors that had tried to claim her. Their
weakness and fear revolted her – but not this one. He had no fear; he
would claim what was his. She tasted his rightness on her tongue,
smelled it on his skin – and was most pleased.
Buffy finished him off with a swirling lick, thoroughly enjoying the
taste of him. She never thought she would like that, but something about
Spike… Every bit of him was just plain delectable.
He lay back in dazed contentment, hardly able to comprehend that the
angelic beauty before him had just given him the blowjob of a lifetime.
She kissed his belly affectionately and crawled up the bed to snuggle in
beside him.
He sighed happily and pulled her close, feeling like the luckiest bloke
in the world. And it was only the beginning – so much lay ahead of them.
There were so many things he wanted to show her, to teach her. She’d
never even been off continent! A whirlwind trip to Europe unfolded in
his mind, Rome, London, Paris…he’d give her the world wrapped up in a
neat little bow - a fitting gift for his princess. He was picturing
moonlight strolls along the Seine and mad shags at the top of the Eiffel
Tower when Buffy’s voice broke in on his planning;
“ Whatcha thinkin’ bout?”
He smiled at her adoringly and tucked a golden strand of hair behind her
ear.
“ You.”
“ Again?” She teased.
“Always.”
And he rolled her to him for a sweet, lingering kiss.
Buffy’s cell phone chose this inopportune moment to go off on the night
table.
“ Ignore it, Love.” He pulled her closer, molding her body to his.
“ Oh, I plan to.” She said, moving in to devour his succulent mouth.
The little phone stopped ringing as it transferred into her voice mail.
*Plenty of time to get that later.*
She thought busying herself with the sweet fullness of his lower lip.
*Spike flesh...Yum…*
Her phone began ringing again a moment later.
“Dammit!” she cursed, rolling sideways off his lap to check the caller
ID, it was Willow. “This better be important.” She growled picking up
the phone.
“ What’s up, Wil?”
“ I think we found something. Can you come to the shop?”
“ When?” She stared longingly at Spike who was laid out before her like
a Calvin Klein ad; all sexy and shirtless with just the top button of
his form-fitting jeans undone, showing off the commando state of affairs
below.
“ Well, now actually. It’s important, Buffy.”
Buffy let out a small whimper of frustration.
“ Alright, alright. I’ll be there soon.”
“ Great. Bye.”
Buffy clicked her phone shut with an aggravated snap. She looked at him
regretfully.
“Baby, I have to go.”
“ Damn. Scooby business? Somethin’ bout you?”
“ Yeah.” She said listlessly. “Willow said it was important.”
“ If it was for any other reason…”
“ I know.” She sighed, feeling annoyed. The last thing she wanted to do
right now was leave him.
He snuggled up behind her and nuzzled her neck affectionately.
“ S’all right, Love. There’s always tonight. I could take you out…” He
nibbled her ear, “ Or keep you in…”
Buffy nuzzled back, cuddling closer.
“ Mmmm. Quality Spike time. Sounds perfect.”
He wrapped his arms around her tightly.
“ Lemme spoil you, Kitten. I’ll take care of you all night.”
She smiled brightly at the thought.
“ It’s a definite date.”
She kissed him sweetly then, loathe to leave the comfort of his arms.
But if she waited much longer she wouldn’t go… She’d get sucked back
into the velvet warmth of their bed and that’d be it for the rest of the
day. Buffy disengaged herself gently.
“ Guess I’d better shower.” There was a marked lack of enthusiasm in her
tone. “You gonna show me where the hose is?”
Spike looked deeply offended.
“ Hey now! I’m not an animal – it’s a proper shower.”
She tilted her head and looked at him skeptically.
“ Really? Cause I’m picturing something you MacGuyvered together with
duct tape and a rain gutter.”
“ Underestimatin’ me as usual.” He snorted derisively, shaking his head.
“ It just so happens I know a demon contractor who owed me a favor or
three. Had a shower and sink installed, plus a few other necessities.”
“ Like a toilet?”
She asked, not relishing the thought of another precarious squat in the
tunnel.
“ Like a towel rack and medicine cabinet. Don’t need a toilet.”
“ Oh. I just thought with Faith staying here maybe -”
He cut her off;
“ She never stayed here.”
Buffy looked doubtful.
“ No?”
“Not really, no.”
“ How come?”
Spike shrugged non-commitally.
“ Didn’t want her here. This is my space - my…place. Didn’t wanna share
it with anyone.”
“ But you let me stay…”
She said, fishing a little. He faced her, resting his hands on her
shoulders.
“ Cause you’re the exception, Pet – to every rule.” He smiled. “ Now
about that shower…”
Spike took her hand in his and gave her the grand tour of the
facilities, taking up exactly 5 minutes including the interludes for
kissing.
“I could join you, ya know…help you with those hard to reach areas.”
He waggled his eyebrows suggestively.
“ Spike...”
She warned, feeling her already jello-y resolve wavering.
“ Come on, Baby…”
He gave her an adorable pout, doing his best to be irresistible – not
like it was a stretch. She shook her head at him, smiling.
“ But Buuufffy-”
She cut him off with a raise of her hand.
“ Nothing you’re about to say leads to me getting clean.”
“ True.” He grinned wickedly.
“ Don’t make this any harder…”
She pouted back at him.
“ Harder, eh?”
Buffy smacked his arm with a laugh.
“ Stop it, you big perv.”
He smiled genuinely at her, enjoying their easy rapport.
“ Alright, alright. I’ll stop. But can I at least watch? Always been a
dream a mine to watch you shower…”
Spike sighed lustfully.
“ Only if you promise not to do anything pervy.”
He grinned triumphantly.
“ Done.”
Somehow she just didn’t believe him.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Buffy found Willow and Giles at the Magic Box an hour later. Willow
looked ready to pop from excitement. She bounced eagerly in place
grinning.
“ What is it, Wil? Better tell me before you explode.”
“ It’s just that we found something -”
Giles came forth with an open book in his hands, interrupting her.
Willow shot him her ‘Glare of Death’. SHE wanted to be the one to tell…
“ In our research we discovered a passage in the Book of Tarnis about
the monks you encountered.”
Buffy glanced down at the pages in front of her frowning.
“ The ones who made Dawn?”
“ Precisely.” He began flipping through the book. “ Their order was
initially Franciscan but split into their own sect after the discovery
of the Key - sometime in 1289. Once they realized how powerful, and
potentially dangerous, it was they created a covert sect to protect it.”
Willow broke in;
“ Ooo, and those Renaissance Festival-type guys that’ve been chasing
you?”
“ Yeah?”
“ They were originally part of the Knights of Templar.”
She said triumphantly, giddy with so much barely-contained knowledge.
“ Which means what?”
Buffy looked at her expectantly.
“ Nothin’. I just thought it was cool.”
Giles seemed to find the page he was looking for.
“ Yes, the son of the last Grand Master of the Knights Templar, Etienne
de Molay began the sect after his father was burned at the stake for
heresy in 1314.” He scanned the pages in front of him, reciting
information. “ King Philip of France began persecuting the knights in
1307… He wanted their vast wealth to fight a war with Edward I, it’s
purported he was also threatened by their power and immunity within the
Church.” He stabbed a finger into the book. “ Here it is - Jacque de
Molay was wrongfully executed by Pope Clement and his son vowed to
continue his father’s work. That’s when the Knights of Byzantium were
founded.”
Buffy was unmoved by this show of intellectual prowess.
“ Fascinating. And this has to do with me how?”
“ Er - yes. I do apologize. Ahem. We discovered some information
regarding the Order of Dagon – the monks you met up with. It seems one
of their most recent members – Brother Ibrahim, kept a journal. An
account of all that has transpired in the order over the past 25 years,
including the spell that transformed the Key into, well … Dawn. The
council only recently acquired it, after Brother Ibrahim died at the
hands of Glory and her minions several months ago.”
*Finally! Something I can work with.*
Buffy jumped into pro-active mode.
“ So how do we get our hands on this thing?”
Willow grinned at her.
“ We already have, Buffy. Giles has the hook-up.”
Giles raised his eyebrows at that.
“ Indeed. I had to call in a rather large favor from an old associate
still connected to the Council – but we did obtain it. Not entirely
legally…”
Buffy put a hand to her chest in mock dismay.
“ Giles! You did something naughty? And possibly illegal?”
He looked nonplussed.
“ Well, ah…yes, actually.”
She patted his arm affectionately.
“ I’m so proud.”
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
For what had to be the tenth time that week Buffy found herself settled
at the research table, a pile of large and rather musty old books in
front of her. If she spent any more time here she’d have to start paying
rent – Anya would insist on it.
Giles and Willow had spent the last fifteen minutes catching her up on
the history of the Knights of Byzantium, Glory and the Order of Dagon.
Her head was swimming with so much new information. It wasn’t getting
her home again – although at this point she didn’t know if that was
really what she wanted. She was so happy with Spike right now, and he
was happy with her. It’d been forever since she felt this good…
But then again what if Dawn needed her? Or her Mom? She sighed in
frustration. Why did things have to be so complicated? At least she was
relieved from having to make any decisions at the moment - no one had a
clue how to send her home yet.
*Maybe they never would…*
Willow was vying for her attention, so she pushed the bad thoughts away
and focused.
“ There’s something else, Buffy.”
Giles added;
“ Yes, we’ve uncovered quite a significant detail – and it pertains
directly to you.”
She and Giles exchanged an inscrutable look and then Willow sat down
next to her, studying her closely.
“ Buffy – the monk’s intention was for the key to be as protected as
possible. They called on the essence of the Slayer to create her human
form, so she would be physically bound to her guardian.”
Buffy nodded and said carefully;
“ Yeeaah. Hence with the sisterly thing.”
Willow continued;
“ Yes, but when they did it they tapped into every Slayer that was
active at that time.”
Buffy was confused.
“ What?”
*But that means…*
“ They created Dawn from Faith – because she was the Slayer on duty at
the time. But Buffy, you were in self-induced retirement – no one
‘deactivated’ you.”
Giles interrupted;
“ If that’s even possible to do. As far as we know death is the only
thing that…” He cleared his throat. “Well, you see what I mean.” After
tactfully cleaning his glasses Giles continued;
“She is made from your essence, from both of you. In this reality she is
tied to you and to Faith.”
Buffy’s mouth hung open in shock.
“It was always intended for the two of you to be her protectors.”
Willow took over for Giles;
“ They just didn’t get to finish the spell because of Glory’s
interruption. So Buffy here never received her piece of the fabricated
memories.”
Giles continued;
“ Nor did anyone else, so Dawn has been Faith’s sister alone. If it
weren’t for your sudden appearance, none of us would be the wiser.”
Willow smiled at her gently.
“But really Dawn is sister to both of you.
** OMG! Can you believe I did it to you AGAIN? Yet another evil cliffie
- and a whole new twist in the plot. Blame the plot bunnies - they haunt
me and make me do bad things. I told ya there was a reason she was still
in the AU...and this is just the beginning...Mwahahahahahaha ;p
Let me also give much praise and thanks for the brand spankin' new
nominations I recieved this past week;
"Best General We Missed the Bed Again Award" at the Spuffy Awards:
http://www.flesh-for-fantasy.com/SpuffyAwards/index2.php?x=vote.html
Best WIP, Most Humorous, Best Written (!) and Best Author (!!) at the
Lost in Spike Awards:
/www.bringonthebloodshed.com/lsa/form.htm
And finally:
Best WIP,Best Comedy and Best Romance (nice) at the Love's Last Glimpse
awards:
http://www.loveslastglimpse.com/awards/index.html
I'm overwhelmed - I hardly know what to say. Thank you for all the love,
Guys. You rock me. *heartfelt snuggles of love* Rosie xoxoxox**
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