"Good, you're awake. I was getting tired of carrying you," Kralik said blandly.

Buffy stared blankly at the vampire. What had happened? She couldn't really remember. Giles had poisoned her, she remembered that clearly enough. Something about the Cruciamentum. Her mother had been kidnapped. Buffy rescued her, pushing her through a basement window of the Sunnydale Arms but as she went to follow, Kralik had dragged her back inside ...

He'd ... *oh gods* ... he bit her ... and ... and ...

Buffy's hand instinctively flew to her neck, where she felt the rent flesh beneath the pads of her fingers. This couldn't be happening. She began shaking uncontrollably in horror.

"Well, this should be interesting," Kralik observed. "You don't have any idea what's going on do you? Guess it's true that a turned Slayer keeps her soul. Your loss. Get up."

Buffy remained sprawled on the wet grass, unmoving. Turned Slayer? Turned Slayer! Oh gods, Kralik had made her into a vampire. Buffy panicked, starting to hyperventilate.

Her reaction disgusted Kralik to no end, given that she no longer needed breath. No childe of his was going to cling to such appallingly human responses. She was a vampire, something she was going to have to come to terms with *very* quickly.

"Stop that," Kralik snarled reaching for Buffy.

"Don't touch me!" she screamed, scrambling away from the irritated vampires. Quickly rising to her feet, she assumed a fighting stance.

"Little girl, I'll touch you if I want. I'm your *Sire*," Kralik leered, closing on the trembling girl. "It's a good thing I made you weak."

The predatory gleam in his eyes would have stopped Buffy's heart if it still beat. His intentions were unmistakable, and Buffy reacted without thinking, years of Slayer training dictating her motions. Grabbing one of the stakes from the oversized pocket of her denim overalls, she plunged it into Kralik's chest as he moved to grab her. For one sickening moment, he stared at her, open mouthed before exploding in a cloud of dust.

Buffy stumbled, drained from the amount of force it had taken to ram the stake through his heart. She was still so weak. The former Slayer watched bewildered as her Sire's ashes settled to the ground. Dropping to her knees, she shook and sobbed uncontrollably.

She was a monster. She'd been one before, the time Billy Palmer made everyone's worst fears come true. Then it had been an illusion. This was real. Feeling her neck, she found no pulse. She should have been freezing in the cold January night, but she felt no chill.

Happy birthday Buffy, she thought, welcome to Hell.

Angel barely made it back to the mansion before the rising sun crested the horizon, but he paid little notice. His anger was all consuming. He wanted to rend and tear and destroy. He was also terrified beyond belief. Buffy was missing. So was the vampire Kralik.

Giles had come to the mansion a little before ten the previous evening. As he told his tale, all of the overwhelming guilt Angel felt towards the Watcher dissipated in the face of his rising temper. He'd wanted to gut Giles. He'd wanted to get a chainsaw and make good on the threats Angelus had made in that very room.

Giles betrayed Buffy. He poisoned her and sent her into combat with a psychotic vampire, all for the sake of some antiquated "test" designed by the Watcher's Council. The fact that Giles then betrayed the Council by telling both Buffy and himself about the test made no difference to Angel.

Giles had barely managed to keep up with Angel as he made his way to the Sunnydale Arms. The Slayer and Kralik were both gone when they arrived. They found Joyce a short while later, but she had no idea where Buffy had gone. Angel spent the entire night tracking them, but to no avail, they had simply disappeared.

Angel sunk down into the couch with his head cradled in his hands. If anything happened to Buffy ...

Angel sensed it. A vampire, in *his* lair. Normally such a trespass would have angered him, but at this point his rage was blinding. He stood, full game face and turned towards the darkened corner where the vampire crouched. Angel's growl was a sound cold enough to freeze Hell itself.

From the corner the shivering vampire lifted its head and looked at him.

All of Angel's anger fled in one terrifying moment.

"Buffy?" Angel asked in horror.

She was filthy, her face stained with dirt, her tear tracks clearly evident. Her large eyes pooled with tears she had yet to shed. She wasn't in game face, but Angel could still sense her vampirism, the scent of death clinging to her closely.

"I didn't know where else to go," she said in a near whisper.

Angel was immediately at her side, pulling her tiny frame into his own. Roughly kissing her cheeks, he ran his hands over her body, checking for wounds. He found none, save the healing bite on her throat. He held her tightly against himself, rocking her gently, calming her sobs.

"It'll be okay, Buffy," he said trying to soothe her.

Buffy stopped sobbing and looked at him, her expression one of abject misery. "I'm a monster," she said quietly.

Angel looked at her sadly. It was true. Buffy was a vampire, but not a vampire in the traditional sense, hell not even a vampire like himself. She had kept her soul when turned. It was rumored in vampire lore that turned Slayers kept their souls. Angel had never before seen one. He'd never even heard of one. Most vampires were in no position to try and turn a Slayer and if they ever found themselves in one, it was easier to go for the kill.

Rising from his position still cradling Buffy, Angel carried her into his bedroom. He laid her gently on the bed and climbed in next to her, holding her close to him.

"You're not a monster," Angel explained quietly.

"I'm a vampire, Angel!," Buffy wailed in exasperation.

"You are a vampire with a soul," he clarified.

Buffy calmed and regarded Angel carefully. "Like you?" she asked.

Angel slowly shook his head. "No," he said with deliberate slowness, "not like me."

In utter confusion, Buffy stared at him. He took a deep breath.

"Buffy I was a vampire, like any other," he explained. "My body died. My soul was released. A demon took over and rampaged through half the known world for a hundred and fifty years coating my hands in blood. Then my soul was returned, but the demon is still inside me, constantly testing my soul for control."

He looked at Buffy again and continued, "Your soul never left your body. You have a demon, but because of your soul, it will never mature like Angelus. It will be an undercurrent, guiding baser instincts such as feeding. But it will *never* be an entity in its own right. You won't have to live with the guilt of atrocities committed by your own hand. You won't be tormented by the memories of a killer."

"Oh," was the only response Buffy could come up with.

"Buffy," he continued softly, trying to steel himself against her answers. "I need you to tell me *everything* that happened with Kralik, even if you think it's embarrassing. It is extremely important."

Looking at him, Buffy started speaking, her voice hoarse from her earlier crying. "It all happened so fast. When I got to the boarding house, Kralik had my mom. He said he didn't want to kill her yet. He wanted to make me a vampire just like him and mom would be my first meal." Buffy shuddered, "I pushed my mom out the window and then Kralik grabbed me from behind. He pinned my arms and bit me," she pointed to the mark on the left side of her neck.

"I was already so weak. I don't think he really took that much but everything was going fuzzy. He cut his wrist and held it to my mouth. I didn't want to drink. I didn't. But I was so weak. I couldn't fight him. I swallowed some ... then I don't remember anything until I woke up. He was carrying me through the park near the college campus. I started trying to get away and he dropped me."

Buffy took a deep breath, trying to remember everything Kralik had said, "He said something about me being confused. That Slayers kept their souls. He said he made me weak. What did he mean, Angel? How did he make me weak?"

Angel looked at Buffy solemnly, "I need to hear the rest first, then I'll explain everything, I promise."

"Okay," Buffy consented. "He said he made me weak and then I freaked out, I panicked. He got mad and told me to stop. He said he was my Sire and I had to do what he said. He came after me and I staked him without thinking."

Angel sighed inwardly. "Are you certain that is everything that happened Buffy? You're not leaving anything out?"

"I don't think so. That's as much as I can remember," Buffy answered, worried she was omitting some important detail.

Studying her closely, Angel inhaled deeply. She was upset, but she hadn't been abused. Kralik's scent was on her but it wasn't the scent of sex or of the amount of exchanged blood that should have been present. Buffy's own scent was one of fear.

Thank gods Kralik had been so inept.

Giles had explained what he knew about Kralik to Angel when they were searching for Buffy the previous evening. He had related how the vampire had been a murderous demented human with a particular taste for killing women. After being imprisoned in a mental institution, Kralik was turned by the Council. He was a petrie dish vampire, created under carefully controlled lab conditions. It was entirely possible that Kralik, demon or no, was ignorant to the intricacies of vampiric society and the different types of vampires.

Angel bit his lower lip and studied their intertwined fingers for a long while. Eventually his gaze met Buffy's. He leaned forward and kissed her lips tenderly.

"Buffy," he said cautiously, "I don't think Kralik knew what he was doing when he made you."

The former Slayer stared at him, expressionless, before whispering, "He did it wrong? Oh gods, what else is going to happen to me?"

"Buffy, calm down," Angel said soothing her. "Kralik's mistake is a good thing ... or as close to good as we're going to get."

Buffy calmed, relaxing into his loose embrace.

Angel continued, "I don't think Kralik knew much about vampires. I think everything beyond demon instincts was completely unknown to him. He probably had vague recollections about his own turning and used them on you. He must have surmised, correctly, that by taking less blood from you and giving you less of his that he would make you a weak vampire. Theoretically easier to control, although by staking him I think you proved that theory wrong."

Angel smiled at her. "I told you that you could never be helpless, Buffy."

Buffy's spirits seemed to rise a bit with the complement but she looked a long way from happy.

"So I'm a weakling now?" she asked.

Angel nodded, "For the moment, yes."

"What do you mean ‘for the moment'?"

Angel closed his eyes. This was a subject he would have never broached with a mortal Buffy, but there was no turning back now. Time was of the essence.

"You have a choice, Buffy, but you have to make it now. Kralik turned you like a weak minion would be turned. That is almost never done, weak minions are useless to their masters, except as entertainment. Kralik got it wrong. He wanted you as a childe but he didn't know how to turn you properly," Angel explained.

Buffy looked at him, understanding there was a lot more he was alluding to.

"What exactly is the difference between a minion and a childe?"

"The difference between having a slave and having a family member," Angel explained. "Minions are expendable and easy to make. They don't require an over abundance of their Sire's blood to turn and no training is wasted on them. They either survive or they don't, and if they die they can be easily replaced."

Angel swallowed, reticent, even now, to tell her the full truth. "A childe, on the other hand, is *not* created lightly. Most vampires, even the oldest and most powerful have no more than three or four. They take years of training and molding. Turning and guiding a childe is a very intense, long term process."

"Why are you telling me this?"

"Because you have a choice. The first 24 hours of a newborn vampire's life are crucial, nothing is set for you yet. However, after the sun sets tonight, whatever you are will be locked in stone for eternity. No going back," Angel said quietly.

"Meaning what? I can undo this?" Buffy asked hopefully.

"No," Angel said sternly. "You are a vampire, that cannot be undone but you can change the kind of vampire you are."

"How?"

"Right now you are a weak minion who murdered her Sire, who was nothing more than some anonymous minion himself. You will be fair game for any stronger vampire. That means just about any vamp but you. You have no rights in vampiric society, a Slayer turned against her will. You will be an outcast to both humans and vampires," Angel said quietly, his sorrow evident.

Buffy sighed heavily, turning away from Angel as she contemplated her fate. Where would she belong? She wasn't human, nor was she truly a vampire. She wasn't even the same kind of hybrid that Angel was. She was nothing.

"And my other option?" she asked, without turning back to face him.

"Be my childe," Angel said, finding it much easier to say the words without looking at her. "I choose not to live in vampiric society, Buffy, but I still have power there. I am a master vampire, far older than most. I am the eldest member of the Aurelian order of vampires. That is one of the most powerful vampiric families in the world. I am a direct descendant of the Master. Simply by being the childe of a vampire of my age and pedigree you would be extremely powerful. You would not be at the mercy of anyone."

Buffy turned back to face her lover, and said, "There's more you're not telling me."

Angel dropped his gaze once again.

He did not look at her as he began speaking, "The training of a childe is a very intense physical process. There is a lot of blood exchanged. And a lot of sex. It is a very sordid affair and not all of it is pleasant. The Sire/childe relationship is affectionate and can be gentle, but it is also about domination and submission, order."

"Oh."

Angel looked her in the eyes and said, "I would never hurt you if there was any way to avoid it."

"I know," Buffy said honestly.

"If you need to talk to Giles about this," Angel started.

"No!" Buffy interrupted. "Giles poisoned me and gave me to that animal. He put me in this situation. This is my decision. It's my life."

Angel knew she was angry, but some part of him wished she would seek her Watcher's counsel in the matter. Buffy was rather prone to rash behavior. "And what is your decision?" he asked quietly.

"Yes, I want to be your childe."

Angel swallowed heavily, holding her gaze for several intense moments.

"Buffy, do you realize all of the implications of what you're saying?" Angel asked, his voice surprisingly even.

"No," she answered honestly, "but I also know I don't have a choice. I won't spend my life as a weakling."

"Understandable," Angel said seriously.

Not meeting Angel's gaze, she asked, "So what do I do now?"

"Shower," Angel replied evenly.

Buffy's eyes showed hurt, as if he were rejecting her and he immediately qualified his statement with, "I can smell Kralik all over you."

Slightly shocked, Buffy looked at him. Angel had always tried so hard to hide his animal nature from her, to pretend they were both normal people. Apparently that was one of the things that would change between them. She shivered despite the warmth of the room.

Moving off the bed to stand, Angel extended a hand to Buffy. She took it and he led them to the adjoined bathroom. Nervously shifting her weight from foot to foot, Buffy watched Angel start the water in the shower. When the water was hot, he opened up a cabinet and handed her a large towel.

"I'll be waiting when you're done," Angel promised quietly, then leaned forward to place a gentle kiss on her forehead.

Buffy didn't say anything, but nodded her assent. Angel closed the door behind himself as he left the room. Buffy stripped quickly and stepped into the shower, reveling at the feeling of heat. She hadn't even noticed how cold her body had become.

As she showered, Buffy contemplated her future. Angel had said it wouldn't all be pleasant, she wondered what exactly he meant. He had always been her lover, her partner, her equal. She knew enough about vampires to understand that in their new relationship he would be dominant and she would have to be submissive.

It wasn't an easy pill to swallow.

Buffy didn't like taking orders from anyone, but what was the alternative? Spending the rest of her life as a cripple? She couldn't seriously contemplate that sort of existence. It would be worse than death. She just hoped the new aspect to their relationship wouldn't herald its demise. Angel had always loved and supported her, trying to squeeze himself into her life when he clearly didn't belong. Now? There wouldn't be any question of whether he belonged or not. Buffy would be his to do with as he pleased. Power like that could corrupt even the most noble soul.

Buffy shook off the thoughts. This was Angel. He wouldn't hurt her, he loved her. Buffy had to trust in that. She didn't have a choice.

As the water began to cool, Buffy turned off the water. She toweled her hair gently and then dried her body. There wouldn't be much point in hiding now. She hung the towel over a rack, stepping over her discarded clothes as she slowly opened the door.

Angel was lying on the bed on his stomach, nude, waiting for her when she stepped into the room. She swallowed convulsively, her unneeded breaths coming harshly. She'd been intimate with him before, but at the moment, that seemed like a long, long time ago. Despite the degree to which their intimacy had progressed, she'd never seen him completely naked before. It was a sobering sight. He'd removed the covers so that the only the blood red flat sheet and pillows remained. He extended a hand towards her and Buffy walked to the bed to take it.

When she reached the bed, Angel pulled her down onto it on her back. Propping himself on his side next to her, he ran his cool hands over her still warm flesh. Bending his head to nuzzle her neck, an appreciative rumbling growl began deep in his chest. Buffy pressed her thighs together involuntarily to try and still the ache growing within.

"Buffy," he whispered softly.

She moaned in response.

"We're going to do this," he explained in a low purr. "When I'm inside you, I'll drink from you and then you'll drink from me. We'll do this all day, until anything Kralik might have done to you doesn't matter anymore."

Buffy stared at him, a bit scared. Angel understood her fear, and was ashamed by the way it excited him. He didn't want her to fear him, ever, but the prospect of taking a new childe, of making Buffy his childe, was overwhelming. His hand was trembling as he reached forward to tuck a strand of hair behind her ear.

"I know you're scared, but it can't be helped. I'll try to be gentle, try not to hurt you, but it's an intense process." He took a deep breath, looking into her eyes and said, "It won't be like your birthday last year, Buffy."

She suddenly had a rare glimpse of insight into his earlier behavior. "This is why you were so angry earlier, isn't it? You thought Kralik had done that to me."

"Yes," he admitted, unashamed of his possessive behavior. "And I was going to hunt him down and rip out his spine for it."

Buffy smiled and with a fierce kiss, Angel silenced any further questions from his mate. His tongue demanded entrance into her mouth and she acquiesced joyfully. It had been so long since he had touched her like this, she hungered for it deep within. Their tongues mated in an almost brutal dance as they mauled each other's mouths.

With one hand, Angel urged her thighs apart and slipped his body between them. She whimpered as he slid his cock up and down her slick channel, teasing her mercilessly. Just when Buffy thought she was going to expire from frustration, Angel plunged into her forcefully. She moaned loudly at the intrusion, her near virginal tissue stretched in a deliciously painful pleasure. Shifting into game face, he groaned her name.

Angel stilled, panting hard against her throat. It was very apparent from the quaking muscles around his cock that their solitary night together was the only time she had ever been penetrated. She was so tight, clasping him inside of her. He kissed the side of her neck, purring in intense pleasure both from the feel of her body grasping his hard flesh and from the knowledge that she had only ever lain with him.

Beneath him, Buffy began to whimper again. The initial pain had faded almost instantly, replaced by an overpowering lust. She needed him to move within her, needed the glorious friction his hard cock could provide. She dug her nails into his back to encourage him.

Angel released a sharp growl of warning, clamping his teeth firmly around the column of her neck. He wasn't feeding from her. He applied just enough pressure to remind her who was in control. The response had been instinctual, automatic, paying no heed to the tender feelings his heart felt towards the woman beneath him. She whimpered, relaxing her grip on his back and pulling her knees up higher and farther apart, allowing him to do as he would.

Angel growled again, this time in satisfaction, the beast within him easily overpowering the man. As he released his control hold, he bit deeply into her neck, punctuating it with a thrust of his hips. Buffy met his thrusts with animalistic enthusiasm, pushing her hips up to meet his pounding rhythm. She mewled as he drove relentlessly into her near virginal passage.

Abruptly, Angel pulled free from her neck and threw his head back, roaring loudly through his blood covered fangs as he came violently inside her. As his climax subsided he leaned over her body again, turning his head to the side to allow her to drink. Acting solely on instinct, Buffy lunged forward against his neck, joining him in release as his powerful blood poured down her throat. This isn't what it had been like with Kralik. She could feel the power in the viscous liquid she was drinking infusing her entire being.

Gently stopping her before she took too much, Angel cradled Buffy's head. Still joined, he tenderly cleaned the excess blood from her mouth with his tongue as she slowly came back to reality. When she was finally in control of all of her faculties, Buffy smiled up at his concerned expression.

"I love you," she said softly.

"I love you too," he replied hoarsely.

The entire day was spent in similar fashion. They coupled fiercely, clawing and biting each other's flesh, gorging on their mates' blood, drifting in and out of sleep. As the sun sank over the horizon, there was no doubt that Buffy was now Angel's childe.

The End

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