As we walk through the front door, I take his jacket from him, laying it over the banister. I ask him if he wants anything to drink, but he declines, instead he leans close to me, kissing my lips gently. I reach for his hand, squeezing it lightly before leading him up the stairs. He seems a little hesitant, at first, looking back toward the door as if he's wondering if there is somewhere else he should be, but he shakes his head softly, before ascending after me.

I can feel his eyes on me, watching every move, memorizing everything I do, as if it could be our last time together, as if this were to end tomorrow. My room is dark as I enter ahead of Riley, the only illumination cast by the moon through the open shades. I reach for the light, but he grabs my hand, stopping me. "I want you just like this, you're so beautiful in the moonlight, Buffy."

I feel a smile grace my lips, as tear's sting my eyes, the honesty in his words touching my heart, warming it, as though it had been cold from lack of use. Riley stands there, just staring at me, his eyes wandering over my body, and for a moment I'm embarrassed by his perusal. "So beautiful." He whispers, his voice full of emotion.

My body aches to be in his arms, but I find myself compelled to stand still, feeling somehow that he needs to take the lead. After what feels like an eternity, he reaches for me, his fingertips brushing softly over my cheek before continuing their journey into my hair. He steps closer and his scent assaults my senses. He smells so good, like sunshine, spice, and in the background I think I smell gunpowder.

He is so close to me now, I can feel his warmth and my lips beg for his. As if he read my mind, he leans down, his breath so hot against my face. I close my eyes in anticipation, tilting my head back to give him better access. I feel his lips graze softly against my lips before he pulls back a little. Opening my eyes, I see that he is looking at my hair. I can feel his fingers begin to gently tug at the clips that are holding it up and soon, I find that it is cascading down my back.

He runs his fingers gently through it, smoothing the tangles. "This is how I remember it." He's voice barely above a whisper. And I'm thrown and confused but pay it no mind as Riley dips his head down again. His lips capture mine in a knee-weakening kiss.

His arms gather me to him and I feel myself quiver as I feel him pressed against me. He deepens the kiss, his tongue gently stoking my own, teasing the roof of my mouth and I'm lost to the moment. Riley leaves my mouth, eliciting a groan of want from deep within me. A slight smile plays on his face as he releases me from his embrace, his hands cupping my cheeks. He places a gentle kiss on the tip of my nose before placing one on my chin. His lips wander lower, paying special attention to my throat, all the while backing me toward the bed. My knees hit the mattress as his hand massages my neck, lowering me onto my back.

He's watching me again, his eyes searching my own and I see a sign of sadness in them. He shifts to my side, his hand resting on my belly, his other hand trapped beneath my back. His head lowers once again and I can feel his tongue slide so gently against the hollow of my throat. His hand moves north from its resting place, finding the button at the top of my shirt, he skillfully slips it through the hole. His mouth is quick to replace the cloth, tasting me just above my right breast, as his fingers continue their assault on my shirt.

Riley slips the garment from my shoulders, lifting me so that he can remove it from my body. My body is on fire, wanting nothing more than to have him touch me all over, wanting this to be faster, harder, but something in his eye tells me to be patient, that nothing but slow and gentle would be enough. His fingers stroke the lace of my bra, exciting me with a reverent caress. His lips feather my collarbone, leaving a moist trail in their wake. When he encounters the strap of my bra, he pauses. Sliding the strap from my shoulder, he continues his quest, his lips gently sucking on my shoulder.

My legs open, begging him to lie between them, my body wanting to feel him above me. Riley understands my silent request as he shifts, his body covering mine. My hands find the bottom of his pullover and urge it up. He leaves me for a moment to remove the shirt himself before coming back to his place between my legs. I stroke his chest softly, loving the silky feel of his skin beneath my fingers.

I touch the jagged scar on his left pectoral, my eyes brimming with tears as I remembered what he did in order to save my life. He is so courageous and selfless and I know I don't deserve him. His hand covers my own over that scar, lifting it gently to his lips, he places a kiss on my palm before releasing it. I allow myself to caress his cheek before trailing my fingers through his hair, and down the back of his neck.

He caresses my body so slowly as he leans in for another kiss. I scratch his back lightly, loving the moan it elicits from him. He pulls me closer to him, rubbing gently against my aroused body. He groans into my ear before using his tongue to tease my earlobe.

Above his groans, I heard a distant sound, like the rat-tat-tat of a machine gun. A man is yelling "Captain Finn, your orders, sir?" It’s so soft, that I'm praying he didn't hear it. But as I feel his body stiffen above me, I know. He cocks his head to the side, listening to the darkness. Though I hear nothing but my own panting, I can see it written across his face. He turns back to me, regret and sadness etched across his handsome countenance. "I'm sorry, baby. I have to go."

"Please, Riley..." my voice laced with the want I'm feeling. "Please don't go. I miss you so much." My eyes have filled with tears and I don't even try to hide them.

He looks down at me, his face a mask of determination. "They need me, sweetheart. I need to go."

I grab onto him, holding him tight to me, not willing to relinquish my hold yet. I plead with him to stay, to make love to me, to hold me just a little longer. As I mumble into his shoulder, I feel the dream fade slowly, reality setting in. The pillow, clutched tightly to my chest, is wet with tears. I sit up quickly, hoping to grasp some of the dream, to keep Riley here just a little longer.

But it's over and I'm wide away, my body flushed from the amorous dream, begging for a release that will never come. I glance over at the clock. The red neon numbers read 3:34 AM, declaring it officially Valentine's Day. Riley has been gone for a little over two months and the aching loneliness I feel has not faltered since that helicopter left my sight.

I lay back down, shifting to my side, so that I'm facing *his* side of the bed. I can't bring myself to sleep there, wanting to leave it open for him, if and when he decides to return to me. My palm glides over the cool sheets, long since vacant, wishing he was there to touch. Pulling down the pillow, I sling my leg over it, wrapping my arm tightly around it. Closing my eyes, I can almost imagine its Riley there. Almost.

As I begin to let sleep overwhelm me once more, I mumble softly to my imaginary Riley "Happy Valentine's Day, baby, wherever you are.

The End