The coast was beautiful, even with the images diffused by the tinted window. A sliver of sunlight shone on Buffy's face where she'd opened the window on her side for a little fresh air. Hopefully it would diminish her car sickness. They'd stopped for lunch, of which despite the nausea, Buffy ate a whopping amount. There was plenty of food packed to last them for weeks, but it still concerned Spike how much of an appetite Buffy had now, and if suddenly having food became an issue again it might prove difficult to provide. He'd have to cross that bridge when they came to it. He had skipped lunch himself, human food wasn't sitting with him too well lately. He could go into the forest for a bit of a hunt, find some poor creature and drink its blood, but that thought wasn't overly appealing either. Furthermore, leaving Buffy alone was not an option anymore.

Back on the road Spike watched the world go by, the breathtaking, wild, unpopulated world. Sometimes he preferred this, just the three, or rather four of them, their cosm, their family. However the notion of Buffy giving birth without drugs, a hospital or doctors to help should anything go wrong terrified him beyond imagination. Of course the thought of him trying to deliver the baby himself was another thing that nightmares were made of. He rarely had dreams that brought him fond memories come morning, always nightmares, especially about the past two years. He didn't sleep much anymore, he was afraid every time he closed his eyes that when he'd wake, she'd be gone.

"Spike!!" Buffy's voice cried out. He snapped back to attention, taking control of the steering wheel and righting the direction of the Hummer before it nearly veered off the road and down a ravine. He slammed on the breaks and put the vehicle's emergency break on and buried his face in his hands, trying to breathe steadily in and out in an effort to regain his composure. He was sure his heart would have been racing like a jack rabbit if it wasn't dead.

"Mom?? Are we there yet?" Andrew asked as he woke from his own sleep, but held his voice when he saw something was wrong. Buffy cast the boy a sympathetic look, asking with her eyes to just wait a moment. She tentatively touched Spike's arm and he jerked it away. Buffy unlatched her seatbelt and maneuvered until she was kneeling beside him. Gingerly, she began to stroke his hair.

"What happened?" she whispered.

"Just bloody near killed you!" he growled.

"Spike, get a grip, come on. Talk to me, sweetheart. I woke up and you were all dazy looking, are you sick?"

"I'm not sick the baby will have fangs?" Andrew suddenly asked. Buffy's jaw dropped at the audacity of the question, but knowing Andrew as she did also knew he'd meant no offense.

"No, mouse," Spike answered as he brought them their dinner. He had for each of them a hot bowl of Kraft dinner with broccoli as well as canned peaches for Buffy. He'd tossed a blanket on the lawn in front of the Hummer. And oil lamp burned for light, while a heating element simmered down after having cooked the pasta.

Buffy awkwardly made her way down to the picnic and as she relaxed Spike was behind her stacking pillows for her back. She went to thank him, but he disappeared again, returning with bottles of water. They ate in silence for some time.

She knew there wasn't a right time to broach the subject with him, but if she waited too long, they both might regret it. She offered him a spoonful of peaches,"Here, eat a little," she coaxed, trying to keep her tone from seeming desperate. He waved her off and went back to watching the ocean. Andrew turned away from them.

"No thanks, pet, food hasn't been sitting well with me lately. I come over a bit queasy afterwards."

"Maybe it's because your body's craving blood, not macaroni and cheese." He huffed out a breath, instantly going on the defensive.

"Don't start, Buffy."

"Already started it."

"I'm fine."

"You had some animal something in the forest a week ago? Nothing since, don't you dare tell me you're fine. Normal people can't go a week without eating."

"Vampires can."

"Skinny people in dusty countries? Living skeletons! That's what you said, you're on the fast track to becoming one."

"Oh sod off, it's hardly that bad! Bloody hell!!" That dismissal made her angry, he could be so stubborn sometimes. She had to get through to him and yelling wasn't going to it. She didn't want to manipulate him, but she couldn't see another way at hand. She labored to her feet, Spike reacting instinctively and standing to help her. She pushed his hands away and started walking away down the beach."Buffy? Where are you going, love?" She ignored him and kept walking, increasing her pace. He let her go another twenty paces, then ran after her,"Wait up!"

He caught up with her, coming around in front of her, blocking way,"Please move."

"Buffy, don't be like this."

"You told me to sod off! So, that's what I'm doing. Move."

"Like hell! That's not what I meant, I just wanted..."

"Me to drop the subject, I know, that's why I had to get away from you. I don't think you're even aware of what's happening here!" A stream of tears suddenly flowed down her cheeks,"How can you take such good care of me, watch out for me and not expect me to do the same for you? Spike, a vampire needs blood, there was a time when you used to drink a person or three every night! Even with the pig's blood you still ate everyday. Now look at you, you're skinnier than I've ever seen you!" She poked his hip to punctuate her point,"You're all bone!"

"So I'm not a hulking caveman like some of your others, I'm good enough."

"Spike, dammit, this is about your health and not my stupid boyfriends, in case you hadn't noticed, I'm carrying your baby here! You're a hell of a lot more than good enough. But you're getting sick, I can see it. You almost fell asleep at the wheel earlier. You're tired, you don't look well, Spike...I'm scared for you." He was perplexed, she seemed truly upset. He hadn't thought much of it himself. Certainly he was aware that his lack of blood intake was showing signs, but not as bad as she was making it out to be. Though now her behavior was giving him doubts.

"Took on the bloke last night alright." She nodded, sniffled, then her hand was on his chest.

"But you're angry at something, you don't call me Slayer unless you're emotional."

"Emotional? Great, a bloody wanker now am I?" He sat up, his face marred with so many emotions Buffy couldn't pin point a single one to tackle first.

"You've been up for hours, we can stop for a rest..." He put the car back on the road and started driving them again,"Spike..." He ignored her. Buffy wasn't going to stand for this sort of attitude.

"Pull over, please." He kept on driving, jaw clenched so tightly that his cheeks sunk in. Buffy sighed heavily,"The baby's pressing on my bladder and it's uncomfortable, please stop the damn car, Spike." He hesitated, then did as she asked. She grabbed a box of tissues and hopped down, then slammed the door shut with all her Slayer strength, damn near wrenching the thing off its hinges. She was mad at him and it stung no matter how deserved it might have been. It hadn't been her fault and her first reaction had been to try and comfort him and he'd acted like a beast to her. Apologizing would likely earn him a punch in the nose. When she got back in the Hummer she sat leaning against the passenger side door, staring out the window and out of his reach.

Spike choked on his hurt and the vehicle started moving again. The sounds of Andrew playing with his new hand held video game system were the only disruption to the icy silence between the pair in the front seat. The drive was excruciating from then on out. Spike watched the road, kept his mind sharp, kept his eyes hard and open. He wanted to touch her, to apologize for taking his anger at himself for nearly dozing off out on her. Andrew played his game with focus and intensity, because if he let them see how upset the distance between them made him, he'd probably cry himself.

After an hour, Buffy made the first move. It wasn't anything she said, she didn't move too far from her spot, but in her own way she made things alright between them. She rummaged through the Wal-Mart bag chock full of CDs and chose one. She unwrapped the cellophane and slid it into the car's stereo. She kept the volume low and easy, selecting the song she wanted before curling back up against the window.

Spike knew this one, loved the humbleness and the sensuality to it. Bruce Springsteen's Fire. He felt the warmth returning between them. Loving and fighting, it was just their way.

"Cannon Beach is about four hours off," Spike said.

"Okay," was Buffy's reply. By the end of the song, Buffy was a few inches closer to him. Andrew let out a sigh of relief. He didn't like it when his parents fought.

Chapter 12

Cannon Beach, at least to Spike's memory, had not changed. Along the shore stood megalithic stones scattered along to the ocean's lip like so many monstrous teeth. Douglas firs and cedars were gathered in lush clumps upon the rocks, standing sentry before the forest that divided this sanctuary from the mainland. The sun was hovering on the horizon and the shapes were cut apart from the azure tinged sky of twilight as black silhouettes. The night's rain had already come and gone. Buffy and Andrew descended from the vehicle and made their way to the beach for watch the sunset, while Spike hid out the final minutes of daylight behind the Hummer, unpacking the camping gear and preparing dinner for the humans.

Buffy felt a bit of chill rush through her, the wind off the water decidedly cool and very unlike that what was found back in Southern California. There was still some residual tension between her and Spike, but she wished he'd come and wrap his arms around her. In a day all the strife would have dissipated, but those hours in which emotions ran hot there was a distance in bodies that made for a distance in hearts.

"Do you thin

"Why won't you take my blood?" She said it in such away that he felt ashamed for ever having refused it,"Is it me?" She took her hand away and wrapped her arms around herself, looking down at the sand.

"Since when are you this insecure?"

"That one time, in that woman's house, where you'd buried all those people the First made you kill. You licked the blood off my arm. Is there something wrong with my blood?"

"What!? Buffy, god no. You're the Slayer for bloody sakes, your blood is ambrosia to vamps, a holy liquor - a man could drown in it. You're forgetting that before the baby, I had your blood all the time."

"That was sex, I'm talking about drinking my blood, from my neck."

"I can't do that."

"Why not?" She was trembling and coupled with her tears and sad voice, the vampire was rendered helpless. He pulled her close, his hands on her lower back, pressing her pronounced stomach against him and he rest his forehead down on hers.

"Taking your blood will weaken you, that'll weaken the baby and here and now, in this world where you aren't even guaranteed a decent meal once a day, taking a risk like that is more than I'm willing to wager."

"Half a pint isn't going to make me miscarry, you know. It's not going to do anything to me that I won't be back 100% from in half an hour. Spike, please listen to reason."

"I won't do it." She gripped his biceps and choked on a sob.

"Baby, please." She was practically begging and he wanted so much to give in, he knew if he did he would feel guilty and disgusted with himself,"Please, William, I love you, I want this." She pulled back and held his face in the palms of her hands,"Change for me." He kept his eyes down and did as she bade. She caressed the distorted ridges of his face and smiled,"Don't ever think I don't love this face just as much as your human one." She kissed his mouth, running her tongue gently along his fangs. She took his hand and placed it over her heart, then guided him to her throat. He pulled her closer, his arm all the way around her waist and kissed the pulse point carefully so not to graze her with his fangs. She rubbed his back soothingly as well as the back of his neck, encouraging him onwards. He sunk into her flesh, into her vein and drank. He started to pull away almost instantly, the hot rush of liquid ecstasy that was her blood overwhelming him, but Buffy held him down forcefully until he relented.

He took long, slow gulps until Buffy let him know it was time to stop. He drew back from her, not a spec of her blood on his face, just a little on his bottom lip. He pressed his thumb to each puncture, to take up the drops of blood that escaped before her Slayer healing took instant effect. He bent back down and licked away the smudges, she shivered with a little thrill. Her hands found their way to his thin waist, hooking her thumbs inside his jeans."You feel better, don't you?" she asked. He didn't reply, the look on his face was stern, yet sad also."We're going to do this every couple of days, okay?"

"Buffy..."

"William."

"Don't say my name like I'm a child you're scolding!"

"Then stop acting like one! For heaven's sakes!" She grabbed his lapels suddenly and yanked him to her for a fierce, passionate kiss,"By the way, I'm not really being a martyr here. The bitey thing? Better than sex!" She got a little grin out of him and she finally felt at ease.

Chapter 13

Half way back to camp Buffy was suddenly seized by Spike, wrapped completely in his arms and being thoroughly kissed so deeply she thought she was having an out of body experience. He sucked on her tongue and groped her body with ferocity that had her blood singing. This was a wild passion between them that was so overwhelming she nearly swooned.

When he finally let her come up for air, she found herself embraced close to his body, held tightly with his face buried at her neck breathing in and out deeply. She was uncertain for a moment, but then turned her face to his and then burrowed against his throat, her arms slipping under the duster and around his back."Love you, Buffy," he mumbled.

"Love you too, Spike. We gotta take care of each other."

"I know, we will. I'm sorry."

"I'm sorry too, baby. Let's go back, poor Andrew's probably in a fit and I want snuggles, all night snuggles."

"Be very happy to oblige, pet, get us all nice and warm...you'll let me come inside, make your body sing for me."

"Yes, I need you. Make love with me, all night...I'd be so lost without you. I couldn't bare to be alone out here." He wrapped the folds of the duster around her, sealing them in a cocoon.

"How's the baby tonight?"

"Quiet, just little touches here and there, feels bigger."

"Won't be long now."

"I can't wait to hold them, look in their eyes."

"I want to watch you nursing. I imagine it all the time. Watch their little cheeks sucking and face getting all pink. Those little fingers clutching to your breast. I want to see the life I had no business creating."

"You will, sweetheart and don't give me any of that I'm the evil undead nonsense.I believe in destiny and it was your destiny to be a daddy, so there."

"Yes dearest."

"Thank you, now about those snuggles please, need my nekkid Spike."

"How's about you have your naked Spike after we do something first?" She drew back, a little perplexed, but willing to play.

"Okay, I'll bite...but I like it better when you bite." He gave her a pointed look and she wrinkled her nose at him and kissed the air to him.

"You're quite precious, you know that?"

"Yep, because you tell me and I believe everything you tell me. Now what are we doing before I get me some?"

"We, my lovely love, my beautiful, effervescent, sex pot..."

"Get on with it, vampy."

"Marry me, here tonight on the beach. Bugger the priest...okay, poor choice of words there, I meant forget that there's no priest, or holy bloke or judge or legalities..."

"There's Andrew."

"No church or white gown for my bride..."

"Knocked up here, white gown not so appropriate."

"Champions of Goodness, carrying miracle children in their wombs can wear white."

"I still don't have a dress."

"I like what you're wearing now."

"We don't have rings."

"That I can help us with..." He kept their cocoon secure, but managed to reach into the inside pocket and produced the ring box. The look on her face, the instant tears of joy, when she saw the matching bands was enough to make his soul burn."Takin' that as a yes?" She squealed and it gave him a jolt, then she kissed him.

"Andrew's celibate, he'll make a good priest."

Chapter 14

"Is that the Bible?" Buffy asked, trying to peer over the large volume their would be presidor for the impromptu wedding ceremony held aloft in his hands.

"Uh....no...it's um, The Lord of the Rings," Andrew replied with a nervous laugh."I thought i'd be okay cause of the Berren and Luthien thing, but with Spike as Luthien because he gave up the ways of his people for his mortal love and stuff. Buffy, did Spike ever sing and dance in a moonlit meadow wearing a gown of deepest purple?" Spike gave the mouse a stern glare,"Perhaps not, but I think you'd look nice in purple, it would bring out your eyes."

"Get on with it mouse, or I'll show you what the Ents really did to the orcs at Isengard, and I'm talking about branches where branches don't belong." Andrew's eyes widened in horror and Spike smirked.

"I have no idea what you guys are talking about, but it's creepy and all nerdy, so cut it out," Buffy huffed. Andrew cleared his throat and held his head high.

"Dearly beloved, we are gathered here today, under the um....um...the uh, the....well, um..."

"What, mouse?" Spike asked.

"God, Allah, Shiva, Ahuramazda, or....."

"Willow always said Gaia," Buffy provided,"And the Goddess is all around us now, I think. And Ahurawhat?"

"Zoroastrian uber deity."

"Riiiiight....please continue."

"We are gathered here today in the house. Well, no so much house as great big outdoors, of Gaia, to join Spike and Buffy in holy matrimony."

"Bloody hell, you're making it sound like we're being sentenced to life of hard labor!" Spike groaned. Buffy whapped him across the stomach,"Sorry, mouse, you're doing splendid, carry on." Andrew bravely stuck his tongue out at Spike and Buffy giggled.

"Do you William, take Buffy..."

"Often..." Buffy cocked her fist back and Spike just smiled.

"To be your lawfully, even though there's no civilization to support said law, wedded wife to have and to hold, for better or worse, in sickness and in health, for richer or poorer, especially 'cause there's no more money in the world, as long as you both shall live? Or, unlive..." Despite the jangled version of wedding vows Andrew had presented, there was calm and assurity that had come over Spike as he turned and looked into the hazel and emerald eyes of his intended bride. Buffy saw this, saw his soul projecting out to her the love that had endured and grown over years and her emotions welled up inside her all at once and came forth in tears.

"I do," he said simply, taking both her hands in his and holding them to his chest.

"Buffy....or is it Elizabeth, 'cause Buffy is just the pet favorite abbreviation of Elizabeth, it was popular in the late 18th century England..."

"It's Buffy," she stated.

"Buffy Anne, actually," Spike added.

"That's sweet," said Andrew,"Do you Buffy Anne, take William as your lawfully in a world without law husband to have and to hold, for better or worse, in sickness and in health, for richer or poorer in a world where money no longer exists, as long as you both shall live? Or, unlive..." Buffy closed the gap between her and Spike, until their stomachs were touching and the baby was happily nestled between them.

"I do, and always will." A single tear escaped down Spike's cheek and she watched it run down his neck and wet his shirt,"I love you William..." She took a cleansing breath,"I love you with all my heart, so much so I think's it's full up and then you go and do something that makes me love you more. Our lives have been messed together for almost nine years - can you believe that? We used to despise each other, I guess it was just the passion...and it's always there, whether we're fighting or making love, or just doing nothing. You're inside me, you're in my blood, in my soul...you surround me, take care of me and you've given me a peace inside and a love that is worth dying for, worth fighting for and worth living for....I just love you, Spike." Andrew passed her a ring and she slipped it on Spike's held out and trembling hand.

"Buffy...oh god..." Spike's voice cracked as he tried to echo her words with his own,"My Slayer, my salvation....my redemption. It's all you, all because of you. This demon, in me..." He pounded his fist to his heart for emphasis,"He's fierce and vicious and he loves you like any loves their mate, I will kill for you, die for you, be good for you and be a man for you. I love you better than anyone that's ever been, love you more than I ever did anyone when I was man and as I do now as a vampire. For the longest time you were my soul, Buffy, my guiding light, showing me the way back to myself, back to the boy whose mother loved him, back to the man who wanted a wife and child of his own to love and protect. You saved me, every night you've saved me." Spike fit the ring to Buffy's finger and kissed it. Andrew began to sob and snivel as he clutched the book to himself.

"That's SO BEAUTIFUL!!!" the boy cried.

"Oh, bloody hell, mouse, pull yourself together...honestly...really...terrible..." Spike said this as he wiped his own deluge of tears from his face harshly with the back of his hand.

"There's one last bit there, Andrew," Buffy said softly.

"Oh yeah," Andrew laughed nervously,"Sorry. Uh, by the power vested in me by no one whatsoever, I now pronounce you man and wife, or vampire demon and claimed female human concubine type thing."

"Good enough."

"You may now kiss, or bite your bride."

"Capital plan," Spike mused as he took hold of his bride and kissed her. As the pair of lovers embraced, Andrew all too happily found himself pulled into their arms."Thanks, mouse."

"Welcome, guys."

"That was perfect, Andrew," said Buffy, kissing the boy's cheek,"Now get back in the Hummer, I want to have sex with my husband."

"Pet, you just channeled Anyanka!" Spike exclaimed.

"I did, didn't I? Anya's a nice name for a girl, isn't it?"

"It's lovely, pet. Good name, from a funny, bright girl."

"What about the first dance?" Andrew asked, the married couple looked at him, surprised, he tried to explain,"We have twinkies, they can be the wedding cake and lots of music, so you guys can have a dance...like, like a really real wedding."

"Oh Andrew!" Buffy cried, elated,"That's so thoughtful!" Andrew gave them a dopey smile and dashed off to the Hummer. He opened the windows and slipped a CD into the player, the sudden sounds of a love song playing along with the thrum of the ocean.

"Bloody hell..." Spike mumbled.

"What is it honey?"

"The Bee Gees. Does the boy know anything about me? Honestly, it's been bleedin' years?! How Deep is Your Love? Torture."

"It's sweet, corny, but sweet. He's happy, let him be." Spike grumbled a little, but smiled, when Buffy's fingertip dipped under his chin and lifted his head up,"You going to dance with me or sulk all night?" He gave a little snarl and pulled her into his arms, the pair of them swaying in the cool ocean air, Andrew back by the Hummer stuffing his face with snack cakes.

Chapter 15

Now that they were suddenly alone, trying to repeat more words like those just said in their wedding vows seemed impossible. Part of Buffy thought it was ludicrous that Spike was setting up the bed again, just like they'd had in the store the other night, but on the other hand there wasn't anything more romantic to her mind than making love on the beach under the moon. When he came to her, the first touch of his hand on her body had her suddenly so overwhelmed with desire she let out her breath with a slight cry of urgency that sounded like pain. He was shaking himself, already fully aroused and aching to be with her. The duster dropped off his shoulders and fell to the grass, he kicked off his boots, then grabbed her shoulders and crushed his mouth to hers. This kiss was poured into her with all his love, his soul, every passion of the demon and hope of the man. Buffy fell into him and let him hold her up, let him fill her up.

The efforts to get their clothing removed were hampered by their unwillingness to part their lips and when they got their shirts bunched up around their necks, the laughter started."Look at us, like a bloody pair of teenagers swimming in hormones and premature eja..."

"Don't you dare!"

"Buffy! I wouldn't. I'm the five hour man, remember?" He made a lewd gesture with his tongue, to which Buffy snapped open her bra and stripped it off as well as her shirt. Spike pulled his own shirt off his back and over his head, then tossed it to the wind."Look at you..." She made a face, letting her arms flap to her thighs.

"Chubby, all quasi-bodied Buffy...." The cool wind air had her nipples stiffly erect, her skin covered in goosepimples. Spike chuckled warmly, a deep sound rumbling in his chest, and bent his head down to on of those ample mounds of flesh. Taking one nipple in his mouth he suckled fervently as she draped her arms over his back. He tugged down her jeans and panties while she helped shimmy them down her legs. Her nipple, tingling from the attention he'd paid it, popped free from his lips as he descended to his knees. He helped her off with the boots and the rest of her clothes, all the while nuzzling the soft curls on her mound, untrimmed in years and just how he loved them. She was the perfect embodiment of woman. His lips pressed wet, open mouth kisses to her swollen stomach, her scents and heat radiating to all his senses. She was still exposed to the elements, and before she could catch cold, he was on his feet and taking her to bed.

Once inside the heavy layers of quilts and blankets and Spike naked finally, Buffy decided it was her turn to be worshipful of his body. They could only see each other's faces, given the little chrysalis of quilts they were under, but they could feel. Spike opened his mouth, felt his eyes roll back and moaned, when her two hands closed around his erection. One moved steadily up and down the shaft, the other massaged his sac. Her touch rendered him speechless, helpless and submissive. Her hands eventually left him, moving up over the plain of his abdomen, over his chest, then settling on his shoulder for support as she moved over top him.

Straddling his waist, the blankets still around her shoulders, Buffy slowly let him part her soft folds, then bit by bit, become enveloped in her snug heat. Settling comfortably down upon him, she bit her bottom lip and smiled, adjusting to the familiar sensations. His hands ran along her thighs while he pushed up with his hips and was gifted with little mmmms of pleasure from his wife. She wanted to ride him like she used to, slam their bodies together in a wild frenzy, but those days are gone, replaced with a carnal lust born of the deepest love on Earth. This doesn't mean of course that it wasn't still phenomenal.

With calculated movement, Buffy angled her hips back and forth, flexing and tensing her inner muscles around his cock, the pair of them sinking low down into the pleasures of it. She flipped her hair to one side, the long tresses falling over his arm and shoulder. Buffy rocked a little faster, a little harder, rubbing her clit down on his pubic bone while his hand roamed over her back and bottom. She arched her back, presenting her full breasts to him and Spike raised himself up and flicked his tongue over the nipples. Buffy's little sighs of delight pleased him and he thrust up with a little more purpose, always mindful to be careful. After a moment she pushed him back down against the mattress.

She was slow and easy as she began to slide herself up and down on him. As she rose, she tightened herself around him, making him groan loudly, going back down was for her own pleasure, letting his length hit the sweet spot. The looks between them were beyond lust, into a love that transcended the act. The carried on guided by the ebb and flow of the ocean, until the breaking point came and they cried out with their climaxes. They would have gone on all night, but there was a serenity to this place that lulled them to sleep quicker than usual. It seemed somehow that this was the first time in two years, that they could rest.

Chapter 16

The sunlight of late morning coupled with the salty ocean air and fragrant trees lining the beach were the elements that made this the perfect morning to wake up to. The night before had been to her recollection the absolute happiest of her entire young life. It definitely hadn't been the wedding of her teenage fantasies, but in truth the only part of those fantasies that mattered were that she was with a man she loved. The silly dream of a white dress and a church with Angel frankly made her a little disgusted with herself. It had been the aspirations of a little girl, now the reality of husband and child was so much sweeter, no matter the conditions. She opened her eyes and blinked quickly as the light assaulted her senses and just like with children, the sudden brightness made her sneeze.

It took her a few moments to realize that Spike wasn't by her side, which wasn't surprising given the time of day, but where would he be otherwise? She looked over to the grass, where his duster, clothes and boots form the night before still lay. Panic seized her and she tossed back the covers, searching for his dust,"Oh god!!" she gasped, there wasn't even dust.

"Right here, precious," he said solemnly from his position sitting at the end of the bed, his naked back fully exposed to the sun's rays. He had his knees drawn up to his chest, arms around them and chin resting there. He'd been staring at the ocean since dawn, since he'd woken to find his exposed leg not being burned by first light. Buffy scrambled over to him frantically, having to touch him and make certain he was real. He quickly pulled her on to his lap and wrapped his arms around her, hiding his face between her breasts and sudden sobs wracked his body,"What's happened to me?!" She held him tight, rubbing his back and kissing the back of his neck.

"Are you still a vampire?" He nodded, raising his face to show her the demon. She smiled at his other face and pressed her lips to the ridged brow,"Are you somehow alive too?"

"No...m'heart's not beating. Just...just not burning anymore. Buffy, why am I not dust?"

"Why am I pregnant? I don't have the answers. Maybe it's because of how the world's changed. Hey, it could be radiation poisoning that's changed you - made you all mutant vamp?"

"Which would make the little'un one too? Not doing a terrific job of cheering your husband up there, pet." She batted the back of his head and gave a pout.

"Or Gaia's changed the world in such a way that you've naturally evolved, making you fertile and non-conbustable?"

"That's better. I didn't get any sunglasses at Wal-Mart."

"You'll live."

"Yeah."

"How does it feel? Being out in the sun after well over a century?" He peered up at the blue sky and shivered slightly, prompting Buffy to encircle his shoulders with her arms,"Hmmm?"

"Scary, very bloody fucking scary!"

"I wonder if you'll freckle?" He rolled his eyes at her, intimately pleased that she knew him well enough to crack a joke. He dropped his head to her shoulder and sighed.

"Sweetheart, I'm so glad you're here."

"I'll never be anywhere else. You can play in the sunshine with the baby."

"Yeah, guess I can now, I'll enjoy that. Sometimes I see us with a little girl, and she's chasing a butterfly, picking flowers....I know, terribly poofy of me."

"Not at all, just the kind of thing I love to hear you talk about."

"Or teaching my son how to play footy."

"Soccer?"

"Football, pet. Speakin' of footballs..." He hand patted her round tummy,"Definitely bigger, you're into your last trimester."

"I think so. I hope Seattle's everything we're expecting it to be, that we can deliver the baby safely there."

"It will be, I trust your dream. I trust the Slayer."

"The Slayer doesn't always know what's best, we learned that lesson the hard way." She looked at him and smiled, thought it was full of woe,"I couldn't lose you, I couldn't let you sacrifice yourself. It was wrong and it was selfish and it's because of me that the world ended."

"World's not ended, love, it's beautiful, you see it for yourself. I would have done it too, I was ready to die...but hearing your words of love, your tears, you begging me to stay....so sod the bloody world, Buffy needs me...I was weak, I should've done it."

"We're together, we're blessed....but it cost so much...."

"Guilty because we're happy, I know, I feel it too, but the bitty one doesn't deserve that, so we go on, we live. We make our child's life worth it, they died so our baby could live. Some would say that's wrong, but if we think like that we might as well give up now."

"Seattle's the answer, I know it is."

"And I believe that too, so Isuppose we should get to it then, shouldn't we?"

"Or we could...uh..." She nibbled on her bottom lip and trailed her finger down his chest,"You're so beautiful in the sunlight." Drawn into the kiss, Spike held her to him with his hand resting on her swollen stomach, smooth ripples of movement under the surface. The intimate moment lasted only a few seconds when Spike suddenly tackled away from Buffy and being smothered by a heavy quilt.

"Andrew! Let him up!" Buffy ordered. Andrew turned his head and yelped at the sight of a completely naked, yet very commanding Slayer. Spike used the distraction to toss Andrew off him and get to his feet.

"Bloody hell mouse! What'd you do that for?!" Spike demanded. Andrew turned to see Spike and his own sculpted nude body, the boy's eyes growing wide and focusing in one place."Hey! Eyes on the trees!" Spike grabbed the quilt and covered the source of his modesty, then noticed that Buffy was just as starkers as he was,"Slayer, cover yourself!" Buffy rolled her eyes and grabbed a sheet from the bed and wrapped it around her body.

"You're not on fire!" Andrew exclaimed.

"Oh, right...that. Funny thing that, er, no longer flammable."

"Cool." Andrew smiled, Spike had a very nice chest. Spike cleared his throat, the situation at a bit of a stalemate. When Buffy's wandering hands gave his bottom a pinch, the vampire reacted.

"I need my pants!"

Chapter 17

They were back on the road in a short time, Andrew taking shotgun while Buffy reclined in the back with a discman listening to something boyband-ish, Spike was certain of that. Spike had the window rolled down, the sun shining on his arm and face. At his request they were heading inland towards Portland. He wanted to visit the city, specifically a bookstore, hoping the place was still there. Powells was the largest in North America and ought to have everything under the sun. Spike wouldn't let either Andrew or Buffy say no since they had the time and he had the inclination.

Andrew certainly didn't seem to mind, the thought of free range of the sci-fi section was super. Buffy was open to it too, but only because of Spike's strange enthusiasm for the idea. She relaxed in the back, leaving the two males to converse for the next couple of hours. There was a reprieve of enjoying a sing along to Creedence Clearwater revival, but given the phenomenal string of miracles he'd been gifted with, Spike's conscience was telling him that perhaps it was time to reach out. The disc ended and Andrew went to change it, but Spike stopped the boys' hand and instead turned the volume silent."Hold up a mo', mouse," Spike began, his voice lower and more intimidating than usual.

"K'..." Andrew was always nervous when Spike addressed him directly.

"Been meaning to talk to you 'bout something. Was wondering how you're getting on."

"Really? I'm great, yep."

"Uh-hun. You sure about that? I also wanted to say thank you for earlier, I know you meant to protect me, thought you were saving me." Andrew looked down at the floor and shifted uncomfortably,"I did want to ask though, if you fancied me a bit?" Andrew was suddenly beet red and visibly agitated.

"Wha...what??"

"Simmer down, mouse, we are adults here....well, me not so much according to Buffy. I know there've been times when you watched Buffy and I...er...together, you know, makin' love. Or maybe it was Buffy you were watching."

"I...I...it won't ever happen again!"

"Mouse, take it easy, I'm not angry with you. I want to help you. You're a young man and you're alone out here, even though you're with me n' the Slayer, you're still alone. Guess you could say I'm curious too, thought you could use another man to talk to about it - whether you fancy blokes or lovelies like Buffy. I won't be judging you."

"I don't know..." Andrew whispered, his embarrassment showing itself with tears in his eyes.

"Well, would you rather have a kiss from me or from Buffy?" Andrew thought about it for a moment, then sniffed.

"B...Buffy. But you're nice too."

"Alright. Now's that because she's a hot little number, or because she reminds you of your mum?" Andrew didn't answer.

"Thought as much. I've been with blokes before you know?"

"Really?"

"Long ago, not too long after I was turned. Can't say as I had much choice in the matter, I was the low one on the proverbial totem pole and when Angelus tells you to do something..." His voice trailed off and Spike took a steadying breath.

"You mean he??"

"Not something I'm too keen on rehashing if it's all the same. Been over a century anyways, right? Later on though, sometimes Dru made requests.....who was I to refuse her...anyways, I'm just trying to say that it's alright for you to like who you like, alright? Buffy and I, we...uh...you're a member of our family. Okay?"

"Okay."

"Good, that's uh....settled?" Andrew nodded,"Good." Spike reached over and gave the boy's shoulder a squeeze."You're a good fella, mouse."

"My mom and dad...." Andrew didn't think there'd be another time when someone would want to hear about the stuff he'd never been able to tell anyone about.

"Go on, I'm listening."

"They fought all the time, mostly about my brother Tucker. He liked to do bad things, he summoned these demon dogs once to kill everyone at Buffy's prom. But it started way sooner, when we were little."

"What about you during all this?"

"In my room, I used to hide in the closet...or on the roof. It was quiet out there, the yelling wasn't so loud."

"Your dad ever hurt you guys? Was he mean bastard?"

"He used to drink, it was only like that when he drank....mom wouldn't let him hurt us...but she...she got hurt...."

"M'sorry 'bout that, damn sorry. Too bad you n' Harris never got to trade war stories. I remember when I was stayin' with him how his folks always got into a terrible row. I barely remember my own father, he died when I was a boy. I remember that he was kind, and that he read a lot....and I loved him and he loved me. Just impressions are all I have left, really. I hope my child knows me well, knows that I love them."

"I miss my mom."

"Yeah, I miss mine too. We got Buffy, though, right? She's a wonderful mum, you can see that already. A Slayer deals in death, but not our girl, not anymore. This one's all about creation, and love. She'll take care of us."

"You take care of us too."

"Yeah, suppose I do."

"You're a good dad."

"Thanks, mouse. You feel a bit better? We good?"

"We're good, Spike."

Chapter 18

Portland was like most of the cities in North America, in utter ruin. Surprisingly however the older buildings still had a foothold. The city had no skyscrapers, so the expanse did not look as severe as some places. It seemed more of a ghost town in actuality.

The bookstore was mostly there, part of the top floor was missing, but both Spike and Andrew seemed eager and enthusiastic about doing some exploring. Buffy admitted she was curious enough to venture in for baby books. Never too late to start learning. She found it odd that Spike went to the trouble of securing and locking the Hummer, but she said nothing. It was just as well in hindsight, there could still be demons lurking out there. By now there weren't any bodies to be seen, perhaps a skeleton or two, but the city looked like it had long been deserted even before the end had come.

Once through the doors Andrew bolted off in search of the Sci-Fi/Fantasy section,"Oi! Mouse! Be careful out there!" Spike warned,"Never know what's lurking!"

"I will!" he called back. Buffy enjoyed seeing Spike's concern over Andrew's well being showing more. His paternal instincts towards the baby had carried over to the boy. Together, the couple ventured into the endless shelves of books.

"So?" Buffy began,"Why the bookstore - I'm not mentally stimulating enough for you?"

"What? No! Sweetheart you n' I have the best talks, I can tell you anything."

"I'm just teasing, honey."

"Oh. Right. Sorry, a lot's been weighing on my mind lately, the sun walking n' all that rot."

"I understand, it's still kinda wiggy for me too."

"There's a reason for coming here though. I don't want to come over all heavy, but if there's a chance that Seattle's not what we need - I'm going to be the one delivering our baby. So we're here for books on how, not to mention everything else they've got about child health and care."

"Wow, that's so...thank you."

"Just taking care of mine."

"And I love you so much for it, all the more. I know you'll take the very best care of us."

"I'm also gonna go check out the sexuality section for dirty pictures!"

"God, you really are such a pig."

"Oink, oink Slay girl." He made a lewd gesture with his tongue and fingers. Buffy's jaw dropped."Mind you, come to think of it, you're looking awfully pink and round."

"Hey!"

"Better run, little Buffy, before the Big Bad catches you!"

"Or you'll huff and you'll puff..."

"And blow you!" Buffy was very much liking this game. Spike advanced on her, morphing into game face. Buffy started to run away and the vampire gave chase. Buffy squealed when he finally got her, pushing her back up against the wall, yellow demon's eyes gleaming at her with a flash of white fang from his mouth. She was so hot for him she could barely stand it.

"You've caught me you big bad evil vampire you!" Buffy toyed, meanwhile undoing the buttons on her blouse until her new bra was revealed, very lacy and very black. Spike liked it.

"That I have, love. Whatever are you going to do?" His fingers gently tugged on a concealed nipple, making Buffy's skin flush with desire.

"I could scream!" Her hand shot out and cupped the heavy bulge straining against his denim. He pushed himself into her hand.

"Then I shall quiet it with my deadly kiss." He quirked his face at her apologetically for having just uttered something so horribly clichéd.

"You better put me under your hypnotic thrall, thus making me your helpless slave."

"Make you do all sorts of wanton, shameful things, dirty, wicked, sexual things."

"Yes please, master vampire."

"Master? Oh I like, pet."

"Thought you would, pig."

"Whatever. Tell me more about my thrall."

"It's so powerful....and so big!"

"Powerful is it? Big you say?"

"Yes, I get this tingly feeling down there..."

"Down where?"

"...and it makes my skin all hot."

"Perhaps you should take off all your clothes then?"

"Why don't you help me?"

"With pleasure, and....evil." He went inside her shirt, but she slapped his hand away.

"Un-huh, just the fangs."

"Oh someone's a kinky little thing, aren't they?"

"Shut up and bite me!" With a lustful snarl his demon emerged and lunged for her throat. Buffy gave a sharp but ecstatic sigh when his fangs sunk through her skin and into the vein. He drank her slowly, reveling in the rush of delicious hot blood sliding down his throat. Buffy's hands massaged the muscles in the small of his back while the pair of them moaned at the divine sexual connection this was. However just as Spike released her and was laving over the wounds with his tongue, Buffy forcefully pushed him away. Before he could get a word of protest out he witnessed a stake plunging down towards Buffy's chest, right where he would have been.

"BUFFY!!" he shouted, but his Slayer had her wits about her. In a move that combined knocking the stake from the attacker's hand as well as kicking their midsection, Buffy sent them flying. The aggressor slammed back into a shelf of books, then fell forward to the floor. They wasted not a second and came back on the offensive. Luckily Spike was too. He snuck in with a right hook into their ribs, slipped up their arm, took hold of the wrist then twisted himself under the arm. This trapped it behind their back. His other arm pinned the free one of his opponent to their side, his firm around their waist. He growled, fangs poised at their neck.

It was then that the girl screamed."Well bite size," Spike laughed,"That's what you get for biting off more than you can chew!"

"Spike, honey, you already kicked her ass, no need to make with the bad puns," Buffy scolded.

"What? You're the only one who gets to be quippy? Buttons, pet." Buffy ignored his statement, but listening to his advice and buttoned her shirt back up. Then she looked over the girl. She was close to Dawn's age, or at least the age she'd been when she'd died. This girl however was nothing like Buffy's sister. She was no taller than Buffy herself, but had short spiky hair dyed fire engine red with black roots showing. Her face was clean and pale, but her eyes were dark and smudged with mascara. She wore a leather motorcycle jacket, black t-shirt, dark green cargo pants and combat boots. The look was completed with a dog chain around her neck.

"What's your name?"

"Not telling you a thing, vamp whore!" With that remark, Spike gave the girl's arm a hard twist and she cried out.

"You'll show my wife respect," the vampire ordered.

"Wife?! You're married to a vampire?!"

"Spike's a lot more than a vampire, a hell of a lot more. For one, he has a soul," explained Buffy. That got the girl's attention,"He also happens to be able to walk in the sun and..." She patted her pregnant belly,"Father children."

"How's that possible?"

"We dunno 'bout the last two...soul's another story," Spike provided, slipping back into his regular human face. His captive visibly relaxed at that,"But I reckon it comes from the same magic that's made you a Slayer."

"A what?"

"Figured as much. I'm gonna let you go now, but there'll be no staking of me, understand? Otherwise the missus might take offense and beat you into next Tuesday." Spike twisted away from the teenager and gave her a push, allowing himself enough time to get to Buffy's side in case the young Slayer attacked again.

"When did it happen?" Buffy asked,"Your strength, the instincts, knowing how to kill vampires?" The girl looked at Buffy, somehow recognizing that this small pregnant lady in front of her was unlike anyone she'd ever met in all her life. Then there was the vampire, dressed in clothes she rather liked, but with his hands on his wife's shoulders gently kneading her muscles. There was a tenderness in him that no vampire she'd ever encountered had ever possessed. He looked down on the woman he called his wife with such admiration and love, that it almost made her forget what he was."You're what's know as a Slayer, one girl in her generation, chosen to fight alone against the vampires and demons..."

"And who are you?"

"Well, see, that's where things kinda get...."

"Divergent," Spike said matter of fact,"She's a Slayer too. Actually, she's the original one for these times, but she was dead..."

"Just for a little....twice."

"Because of that Kendra was called. Kendra was killed, then came Faith....she was our friend and she died."

"In April," the girl gasped.

"That's right. So now you're the Chosen One. Except you're not alone. Do we get your name?"

"Why should I trust either of you?." The girl was back on the defensive, body taut and ready for action.

"Because my fangs could've been in your neck and I'd have bagged my forth Slayer." Buffy elbowed him in the ribs for that one, then approached the girl.

"What's your name? I'm Buffy, he's Spike."

"Boon."

"That's a name?" Spike chortled before catching another evil stare from Buffy.

"It's a better name than Spike."

"She's right honey," Buffy smiled.

"It's better than Buffy too, lovemuffin," Spike retorted.

"Shut up, honey." Spike gave a ticked off sort of look, but it curled immediately into a dear smile for his girl.

"It's Brenda Moony okay? That sucks rocks, so I made it weird and cool. We're you born Spike and Buffy or did you just take alot of drugs?"

"I like this one, love," Spike offered,"Bit o' the bad in her."

"Boon...have you had any dreams?" Buffy asked, growing serious,"About..." She saw the knowledge in Buffy's eyes.

"Seattle...yeah, I have....god, you guys aren't lying are you?"

Chapter 19

"Why don't we find somewhere comfortable to sit and we can explain," Buffy suggested.

"No, not here....listen, you should go," Boon advised,"It's not safe here."

"Why's that?"

"Downstairs...there's some vampires. I'm here to kill them. I've been...been watching them come and go for a while."

"A nest?" Spike inquired,"Could go for a spot a violence, you don't mind do you, precious?" Buffy sighed and gave his back a little rub.

"Go have your fun, I'm gonna go hang out in fiction." Spike pulled her to the side a bit to speak with her.

"I'd feel a bit better if you'd go find Andrew, I don't want you alone."

"Spike, I am the Slayer, remember?"

"I know, I know. Just......nevermind, I'll stay here."

"Don't be silly, you know you wanna see this girl in action. We're the only ones in the world who can help her, teach her. Why don't I come with?"

"No bloody way!"

"I'll hang back, watch you be all feral and stealthy. Come on, lemme watch my Big Bad vamp be all noble good guy and sexy.You know you wanna play."

"I've got an idea." They turned back to the girl,"Up for a bit of a lark, girl?"

"Huh?" the younger Slayer questioned.

"That's old British guy speak asking if you want to humiliate the vampires horribly before you dust them?" Buffy supplied.

"What the hell."

Down in the lowest part of the building, which housed the children's books, old magazine archives and washrooms, a group of six vampires had hoarded around a pile of loot - nothing that was of an value or use anymore in the new world, but simpleton fledgling demons weren't able to appreciate that little irony. From the moment William awoke after his turning he saw the richness of the world before him as few vampire do, the Order of Aurelius bred a special kind of demon.

Boon had a pack of cigarettes and for this little foil, Buffy didn't mind him partaking, truth being that she kinda liked the subtle scent lingering on him, and would allow it just this once. Of course he still had the zippo and the flame flickered to life after a commanding din of metal on metal. The perfect circle of burning ash that stood in the darkened stairwell immediately commanded the attention of the half dozen vampires.

"You lot from 'round 'ere?" Spike asked, leaning back against the wall, inhaling and letting out a white billow of smoke. The ones that weren't perennially in game face changed into demons without volition, showing themselves to be the dogs they were. Spike rolled his eyes.

"We gonna argue 'bout who's got the bigger lumpies? 'Cause I'm telling you here and now that the champ of that contest always turns out to be me."

"Who are you?" one of the snarled.

"Name's Spike, might've heard a me?"

"Just one, from Sunnydale." Spike groaned.

"Do I sound like a bloody southern Californian? Hail from Merry Olde, but yeah, I'm coming by way of the land a sunshine..."

"Weren't you the Slayer's lap dog?" one of the others asked. Spike chuckled to himself.

"The lap part a that being the operative word. Sure, she kept me in blood n' beers for a while, I didn't get staked, she got serviced. Little tart liked thinkin' she had herself a pet vampire, but I always knew how to take her down." Spike heard Buffy gasp from around the corner where she was hiding. He cringed inwardly, knowing he'd pay for that little comment later,"But that chapter's over...funny, chapter - bookstore.....heh...." No one ever got his humor, Spike carried on,"On the trail of a new girl now, 'eard there's a fresh baby Slayer in these parts. Seen 'er 'bout?" Only one of the vamps was a woman. She was dressed simply in jeans and a flannel coat, long hair, small.

"I've seen her, I know all about her," she seethed.

"That right, tell us, pet, does she come 'round 'ere much, trying to suss out what you lot want? There's not many fresh meals left to this town."

"The Slayer's here."

"Which is why I'm here, if you've heard of Spike then you know that Slayers are a specialty o' mine."

"We know, every vampire knows about you," the first vamp said,"William the Bloody, the Slayer of Slayers." Buffy rolled her eyes, that had probably puffed her husband's chest up like the Incredible Hulk's.

"Good on you, now pony up, where's the little bint at this time of day?"

"Don't know...she's out on the street every night, never comes in here though, she's chicken."

"Oh so she knows about this little family of yours? Funny that, a Slayer being afraid of a bunch a limp fanged wankers!" It took a few for the vampires to clue into the fact that they'd just been insulted, but when they did they all turned to Spike with fangs gleaming and ready for a fight."You know what's even funnier? That she's standing right behind you." Like lemmings over a cliff, the vamps all turned to see Boon standing on top of a low bookshelf, stake in hand, smirk on her face. Spike used the distraction to jump into action. He took the rest of the steps in one leap, slid the stake out from his belt and stuck it into the heart of the closest vamp.

Boon was a little slower to the take, but sharpened up in time to kick a one of them in the face when he came for her. She jumped clear over him and landed behind, thrusting the stake into his back and rendering him to dust. She'd never taken on more than one random vamp at a time, once there was two and she'd barely managed. This situation would have had her scared witless if it weren't for the fact that Spike was laughing and Buffy looked somewhat amused from her position of watching in the doorway. They were having fun with this. Spike was rambling on about Manchester United and how it was a real shame Beckham didn't survive the apocalypse.

The young Slayer's attention was captivated by another vampire when he struck her hard across the face, sending her staggering back into a bookcase. She struggled with him until he was suddenly pulled off her. Spike staked him good and proper."No worries, Slayer. We'll get you trained," he said before going back to the two remaining vamps. Spike was fighting them both off at once, more like playing with them. Good old fashioned slaying had him adrenalized. Boon locked eyes with the one female in the group, a cold angry stare and the Slayer felt compelled to take this one on herself. The vamp showed fear at seeing that steel predatory glint that only came from the source of a Slayer's power. The vampire decided now was not the day to die and took off up the stairs.

Buffy luckily watched the exchange and was ready, but unfortunately didn't expect the vampire to not try and pass her, instead she went on the attack. Buffy deflected the vampire's punch and returned it immediately. The vampiress slammed into the arch of the door and was after Buffy again in seconds. Buffy's motility was as sharp as ever, but she caught her heal on a stray book on the floor and slid a little, this giving the vamp a open window of attack. The vampire's foot landed square in Buffy's chest, knocking the wind out of her and straight into another shelf.

Buffy struggled for breath and deftly heard the sound of a vampire exploding into dust before Spike was rushing over her in a manic state,"Love!? Love? Buffy??!" he cried, falling to her and searching for injuries on her body.

"What the hell was up with that accent?" she wheezed,"Could you be any more cockney trash? It's like your IQ dropped fifty points every time you dropped a consonant!" She touched his face and smiled, trying to put him at ease by making jokes.

"How badly are you hurt?"

"Not at all, I'm tougher than that bitch. Get me up." He reluctantly complied and once he had her on her feet he crumbled, shaking as she hugged him.

"Told you to stay back."

"I did, she came after me. I'm okay, okay?"

"Okay...just...I get scared you know?" She kissed him and rubbed his back.

"How'd your new Slayer do?"

"Pretty good, she needs training, needs a Watcher."

"Well she's go two now." Buffy looked down into the basement where Boon stood kicking about some of the vampires' possessions, looking very sullen.

"I think her pride's a lil' hurt, she did get knocked about."

"I think she'll be good, she's got good instincts and reflexes, she just needs our help to make her into a real Slayer."

"I don't know about you, but I could use a little bit of rest after this latest adrenaline infusion. You scared me half to death, pet. More to death, rather."

"Why don't we have lunch then, you go find Andrew and get the stuff, I'm gonna go find a bathroom. Baby, foot, bladder, you know the drill."

"Alright, pet, be back in a jiff." Buffy went down to Boon's level, but winced and had to pause, there was a sting in her abdomen, but it passed quickly. She came over to the young Slayer, but was shocked to find tears in her eyes.

"Are you okay?" Buffy asked.

"Huh? Oh, fine, fine...just a little...I've never really been in a fight like that before."

"It's okay, you did great, even got a vamp. I totally missed the first time I even tried to stake one. You'll get a lot better, I promise. Spike and I will help train you, teach you."

"Really?"

"Of course. Where have you been living, we can go with you and get your stuff."

"Around...I don't have much stuff, I had to abandon my pack one night - I think it's here with with all this other junk. Buffy?" Buffy had closed her eyes and her lips were pressed tight,"You okay?" Buffy exhaled the breath she'd been holding in and gave the girl a smile.

"I'm fine...just need a washroom."

"Um...I think it's over there." Buffy nodded and headed to where the girl pointed, quickly.

"Where's my lovely wife gotten to then?" Spike asked when he returned some ten or so minutes later, setting down a couple of boxes with food and the stuff to prepare it with. Boon was alone, sitting on the bottom step, Andrew walked down and gave the girl a little wave.

"She went to the bathroom," the young girl replied.

"Right, poor lamb, the little tyke's getting bigger each day it seems. Boon, this is Andrew, friend of ours."

"Hi," Andrew said.

"Hey," Boon replied.

"Buffy been gone long?" Spike inquired.

"Yeah actually, since you left." Feeling decidedly uncomfortable by this bit of news, Spike immediately followed after his mate. Buffy knew it was him before he even opened the door. She quickly finished cleaning herself up and exited the stall. The tears that were still streaming down her cheeks spoke a grave story.

"Sweetheart?" he asked quietly,"What's the matter?" She showed him her hands before she went to the sink to wash away the stains of blood,"Oh no..."

"I'm sorry...I thought I was fine...but then I had a couple of cramps...I came to check just...just...in case.....and......and...." She started to sob, hanging over the sink and barely able to draw in breath. He went to go to her but she held him at bay, too afraid to take the comfort he had to offer. There was something that had to be done first. "I'm sorry...but, I, Spike could you please....heartbeat? Listen to hear if there's still a heartbeat?"

Chapter 20

An intense wave of nausea followed her words, the very thought of him putting his ear to her belly to hear if the baby had died made her sick. She'd have done anything to save him the anguish of having to do it, to go down on his knees before her and perhaps find that their miracle was no more.

"Isn't it moving?" His voice cracked and it was a dagger to her heart. His bottom lip trembled violently and tears already spilled from his eyes. His hand hovered over her stomach, unable to take that last inch and feel what might be a lost child, dead inside Buffy.

"I don't know...not for...for a while now...I don't know, I can't tell. Could you please just hurry!!" He gave her a sharp, pained look, sharing her panic and horror, but unable to do anything but spiral down into the same abyss of despair and fear. He fell to his knees as if his legs had suddenly been sliced off. Angrily he pushed her shirt up, without the inherent gentleness he'd always treated her with, put his ear to it. He was quiet for a few moments, the only sound in the room was Buffy's hard breathing through her mouth. Spike let out a wounded sounding cry and Buffy shattered,"No...no...."

"Strong as ever...little heart's going a mile a minute!" He gave her roundness a full, open mouth kiss, arms flying around her thighs, a litany's of thanks yous to god flowing from his mouth with his sobs of pure joy and relief. Buffy held on to his shoulders just to keep herself upright, her own tears coming hard and fast. The fear had gripped them for only the expanse of a few minutes, but in that time every hell they'd seen in the last two years seemed like a circus by way of comparison."Don't you dare leave us! You hear me in there? Never scare mummy and daddy like this again!" His demand was affirmed by a sudden kick from inside right against his cheek.

"Spike, don't yell at your child." She was caressing the back of his head and holding him firmly, her voice soothing but still a little shaky.

"I don't mean to, pet, m'sorry. Still, something's not right if there's been blood. It's to bed with you until we're certain you're fine, let whatever's wrong heal. No arguments."

"I'm not going to argue...just hold me, please." He rose to his feet and encircled her with his arms, rocking them gently as their tears took time to recede. Afterwards he carried her back out to the basement and told Andrew to set up camp . An hour later they had their own private space, separated by several shelves of books from Boon and Andrew. Settling her down on her back, he propped several pillows under her feet to alleviate any strain on her abdomen, then piled several layers of blankets over her. He sat down cross legged on the floor in front of her, resting his chin near her shoulder, his hand stroking the top of her head. He'd given her the baby blanket he'd gotten for her and it laid over her chest and stomach under the covers, just the corner peaking out. He was singing Greensleeves to her in an effort to lull her to sleep. Buffy tried, but her mind was still too overwrought, so she turned her head and watched his eyes and listened to his voice until he finished the song and he joined her in bed.

His head came to rest on a corner of her pillow, lips just touching her shoulder. Under the sheets they'd linked hands and Spike's thumb stroked the back of her hand,"I'm scared, Spike," she whispered.

"So am I, pet."

"But we're together, so we can do this, right?"

"Keep faith, precious."

"I'm trying, I've never been so scared in all my life."

"Me neither...how's he...she....how are they?"

"There's a hand, I think, pushing up top, like they're testing how much room they've got, it kinda hurts a little, but it's nice. Hold us, k'? I don't think I can sleep." Spike moved cautiously so not to jostle her much until he was on his side and his body was pressed against hers. He slipped his arm underneath her neck, so her head could rest back against his chest, while his other hand laid splayed over her middle, the gentle movement of tiny bones tapping against his palm. She was crying and trying very hard to hide it from him, but he knew.

"What do you think of the name Anne?"

"It's my middle name."

"Yes, I know dear. Do you like it?"

"I guess, yeah...I think mom gave it to me because she felt the need to give me something plain after the debacle that is Buffy."

"I think your name is lovely. Anne was my mother's name."

"Oh! You never said before. You told me all about her turning...but you never said her name."

"Just a thought."

"Good thoughts, tell me more good thoughts. What was your dad's name?"

"Nothing too exciting, it was William also."

"I think that's been my choice since the beginning. I'd like the baby to have a family name."

"Joyce then?"

"Maybe....that would be nice, mom would like that."

"Tara, Willow, Anya and Dawn...all beautiful names."

"We'll have to have lots and lots of babies to fit all those names."

"There's Rupert and Xander to think of too."

"Suddenly we have a soc...football team?"

"Yeah, half a dozen little Spikes to terrorize mum? Sounds good to me."

"Of course it does, you just have to sit back and be the proud papa. I have to do all the work."

"Not bloody likely! You know I'll be right in the thick of it, teachin' 'em, keeping them well fed and warm, making sure they're protected and loved."

"I know you will, you're going to be an amazing father and you'll never leave, like mine did."

"No, I won't. I couldn't bare to be separated from my child, not for a second."

"I know that too. You're unique, Spike, I think, in all the world - that's why we could make our baby, that's why you can walk in the sun. Because you've earned these gifts."

"You shouldn't put such praise upon me, pet, I'm not deserving."

"I believe you are."

"Then I'll let it be, because you're the only one I believe."

"Then believe that I love you and that we deserve to have our baby."

"I do."

"Good, because if you really do, then I can too, then I can fall asleep safe in your arms and not worry that we'll lose them." He saw now what this little conversation was about, if he exuded the same blind confidence he always did, if he was strong, then she could find it in herself to be that way also.

"We'll not lose our family, I promise." She nodded and clung to him and let herself slowly come to sleep in her mate's embrace.