Buttercup

Written by: Jodyorjen
Author's Website




 

Summary: Two of Buffy's ex-lover's return to Sunnydale. Season 7 possible spoilers.
Distribution: Please ask my permission first, just so I know where it's headed.
Disclaimer: All hail Joss Whedon, UPN, the WB, FOX, Mutant Enemy and 20th Century Fox Film Corporation. GO team! Theirs, not mine.
Dedication: For Mint Witch, who redecorated the crypt, too. Great minds think alike, really.
Author's Note: Everyone's writing Season 7. Just call me Bandwagon Girl. Lyrics are from "All Out of Love" by Air Supply.
Feedback: Think it sucks? Want me to bag the whole thing, or do you wanna know what happens next? Drop a line to jodyorjen@yahoo.com


 
 


"Are you sure this is what you really want, Will?" I asked her as she slammed down the trunk of her shiny new Beetle with her elbow.

She juggled the boxes in her arms and I took the top one, balancing it on top of the one that I held. We walked through the parking lot behind her dorm at UC Sunnydale, swerving around hordes of parents
and students moving in for the fall semester.

"It's better for me here on campus. I'll be able to concentrate on academics," Willow explained. A tall blonde girl held the door as we entered the dorm. I followed Will down the hall and into her room, setting down my boxes on the floor.

Xander was setting the time on the VCR, sipping on a Diet Coke. Dawn hung up clothes in the closet and gestured to a tube of posters. "I have the sticky tape to hang these up if you just want to tell me
where to put them," she told Willow.

I looked at my watch. "I should go pick up the books for my classes."

"I'll look after the womenfolk and drop off Dawn at home when we're done," offered Xander. "Are we still on tonight for scary videos and patrolling?"

I smiled and picked up my backpack. "Yep. See you at seven." I said goodbye to the girls and headed out of the dorm, walking through the quad on my way to the bookstore.

There was a line stretching down the hall outside the door, so I pulled my schedule out of my pocket and looked it over. I'd budgeted two hundred dollars for textbooks, and hopefully that would be enough. "Buffy?" said a familiar voice.

"Riley!" I smiled brightly. "What are you doing here?"

"I blew out my knee, and I was discharged from duty. I'm teaching here now," he said. "I'm an assistant professor. Are you taking classes?"

"Yeah, I'm taking evening classes." I handed him my schedule.

"I'm teaching this section of Elder Issues," he said. "That TBA there is actually me. I'm the last minute hire."

I looked him over as his attention was focused on my schedule. He looked great all prepped out in a golf shirt and Dockers. "So how is Sam?" I asked.

"Sam?" He looked at me, puzzled. "Who is Sam?"

I laughed. "Yeah, right."

Riley looked serious. "Really, Buffy, who is Sam?"

"Your wife, remember? The demon hunter?" I held up my hand, gesturing several inches over my head. "Brunette, busty, annoyingly perfect in every way?"

He looked at me sideways. "You always did have a kind of weird sense of humor, Buffy." He patted my shoulder. "Anyway, it's been good to see you. I guess I'll see you Tuesday, in my class." He smiled and
walked away.

I looked after him, confused. I realized something odd. The scar on his face- it wasn't there.


*~*~*~*~*~*



"So, what is he, a robot Riley? Or a pod person?" asked Willow as she served herself a slice of pizza.

"Maybe he's a hologram," suggested Dawn. "Like the doctor on that stupid sci- fi show Xander likes."

"It's not stupid," he retorted. "Voyager is cool."

"I like Enterprise better," said Dawn. "Scott Bakula is hot."

Willow nodded. "Mm hmm."

Xander looked at us in confusion. "Okay, well, hotness aside, here are the movies. Do we feel like 'Reanimator' first or 'A Fish Called Wanda'?"

"I vote for 'Reanimator'," I said. "Hopefully I'll nod off before 'A Fish Called Wanda' starts and you and Willow start reciting all the lines."

"It's K-K-Ken, c-c-coming to k-k-kill me," they said in unison.


*~*~*~*~*~*



His hands held tightly to my wrists as he pinned me to the floor. I could feel the fabric of my robe ripping underneath me as we struggled, Spike desperate to take me and me desperate to prevent it.  He gazed deeply into my eyes as he bared his fangs. "You should have believed in me," he said. "You could have had love, instead of hate."

I woke gasping and sweating, my heartbeat hammering within my chest.  I'd had the same nightmare, every night since he went away. I looked around the room, disoriented, and realized that I was lying on the
couch. Xander was lying at on the floor, crashed out on a sleeping bag. Willow had laid a blanket next to him, fast asleep. Quietly, I crept upstairs to my bedroom and changed into a nightgown, slipping into bed.

I watched the shadows play on the wall as I thought of him. I wondered where he was, what he was doing. Did he ever think of mr, and would he ever come back home? My eyes grew tired, but my body refused to yield to sleep. I gave up and quickly dressed, slipping into the night

I patrolled the cemetery closest to my house, then went to the one where Spike's crypt was. I stood outside and saw the faint blue light of a television, heard the dim sound of Clem's laughter within. I
felt so weak for coming here, but I couldn't stay away. The not knowing was what bothered me most. I'd never been able to stand being the one who was on the outside looking in. Every impulse in my body
drove me to find Spike, to track him down and talk it all out, once and for all. Ironic, that now that I wanted to talk he was nowhere about to listen.


*~*~*~*~*~*



I dropped off Dawn at Anya's apartment for her summer job and drove to the Sunnydale Employment Commission. After checking in with the receptionist at the desk, I waited for my appointment with the
employment counselor. I leafed through my copy of "What Color is Your Parachute?" to kill time.

"Miss Summers?" said the clerk. "Mr. Owens will see you now."

The fresh faced counselor smiled at me as I walked into the office and sat down in the chair. "Hi Buffy. I've got some stellar news for you today," he said cheerily.

"You've found the perfect job for my varied skill set?" I asked sardonically.

"Well, I know we've had some hits and misses, but I think this is right up your alley," he said seriously. "It really does play to your strengths." He pulled a sheet out of the folder on his desk and
handed it to me.

"Assistant Guidance Counselor, Sunnydale High School," I read. "You've got to be kidding."

"It's no joke," he said seriously. "Your summer semester at UC Sunnydale ends this week, and you still expect to get a B average with your course load?"

"Yes," I replied. "The B is in Chemistry, the other three classes should be A's."

"Well, if you carry a full load of evening classes, you're on the right path for graduation at the end of this year," said Mr. Owens. "With your coursework in psychology nearly complete, this is a great opportunity. I spoke to Professor Witham at the university, and Mr. Giles at the high school. This is the perfect chance to earn a full time salary while you receive college credit for an internship."

I looked at the paper in my hand, scanning over the information. "Is this the correct salary?" I asked.

He nodded. "I know it's low for an administrative position, but it is three times more hourly than you are making at your food industry position. Also, there are full benefits for you and your dependent. I know that's been a great source of anxiety for you."

"Mr. Owens," I said. "I just don't know how to thank you."

He smiled. "Well, if we weren't meeting in a professional capacity, I'd ask you out to dinner."

I looked him over, a tall, good-looking man in his late twenties. I knew how kind he was, after all the help he'd given me. "Yes, that's too bad," I replied, as I shook his hand and walked out the door.


*~*~*~*~*~*



"I think I'd rather eat fisherman's nuggets from the DP for the rest of my life," said Dawn, as we patrolled through the cemetery.

"It won't be that bad having Buff at your school," Xander told her. "You'll never even know she's there."

"Every kid in my grade whose last name starts with A-K will be talking to her about all their personal stuff," complained my sister. "They'll all think I'm a loser, or a dork. A lork. High school is going to seriously suck."

"We survived," Willow said cheerfully.

"Yeah, and you're all so well adjusted," murmured Dawn. A vampire lunged out at her from behind a tombstone, and Dawn dispatched it with a kick to the throat followed by a stake in the chest. Dust fluttered all around as the vamp disintegrated.

"You're getting good," I told her. "I think I'll just take the rest of the night off and leave you to patrol."

"Really?" she said eagerly.

"No," I said flatly.

"Overprotective grumpy pants," complained Dawn.

"I'm bored of patrolling," said Xander. "I think all the bad guys are out of the way." He turned to Dawn. "You guys want to come over to my place and play Pictionary?"

"Why don't you all go and I'll meet up later," I said. "I just need to finish this round and I'll be done." They all agreed and set off, their chatter wafting back in the breeze. I took out a few more vamps and a Torloo demon, and headed over to Eternal Rest.

I was rounding a curve between two large mausoleums when I heard a low growling. A pair of yellow eyes glowed in the darkness a few feet in front of me. "Nice doggie," I said in a low voice, taking a step back. He growled louder and stepped towards me, and I saw that he carried a large rabbit in its mouth, freshly killed. The dog stepped near. He was huge, probably weighing as much as I did. Some kind of wolfhound, or maybe it was a wolf, I was never really into dogs.

"Hup," said a commanding voice. The dog turned tail and ran into the darkness. The sound of the voice sent a bolt of adrenaline through my body.

"Spike!" I called out. "Spike!" I ran in the direction the voice had come from, but there was nothing, the empty silence taunting me.


*~*~*~*~*~*



As soon as I dropped off Dawn the next morning, I went back to the cemetery. I knocked on the door of Spike's crypt and walked inside. The interior was furnished in Clem's insane 70's kitsch, complete
with orange shag carpet and a disco ball on the ceiling. I rang the bell that he had placed at the top of the stairs to the lower level.

"Come on down, Buff," he said cheerily.

I climbed down the stairs. The lower level was cleaned and furnished, the walls freshly whitewashed and the floors covered with rugs. It was much the same as it had been before I'd blown it up, carefully
redecorated by Clem and I from castoffs and garage sales, for when Spike came home. But now he was home, and he wasn't here.

I walked past the bedroom area into the new kitchenette. A diner booth from a torn down roadside restaurant had been fitted to the wall by Clem, and he had installed a counter and cabinet on the wall,
complete with a microwave and a sink. "Drink some coffee," he offered as he handed me a mug adorned with smiley faces. "Freshly ground Sumatra."

We sat down at the table and he pushed over a box of donuts. "He's back, isn't he?" I asked without preamble.

"Since the night before last," he said seriously, his large eyes  somber.

"Why didn't you tell me?" I asked him.

"He asked me not to," said Clem. "He was very adamant about it."

"How could you keep that kind of secret from me?" I asked, hurt. "You know how much I missed him. You're the only one I could even talk to about him."

He shook his head. "I'm sorry, Buffy, but I'm his friend, and I need to respect what he wants."

"You're my friend too, Clem," I reminded him.

"You have other friends," he said. "I'm all he has."

"He has me," I said. "I need to tell him that."

"Just leave him alone, Buffy," said Clem. "The kindest thing that you could do for him is to leave him alone." He broke off and looked away. "He's- changed. You really fucked with his head, and I know he
hurt you. Maybe the best thing is for you to just let it go."


*~*~*~*~*~*



Dawn and I walked up the steps of Sunnydale High. "Be home by six," I told her. "I'm trying out Mom's lasagna recipe, and Xander's joining us."

She rolled her eyes. "Is that a promise or a threat?" She gave me a smile. "Good luck on your first day, Buffy."

I watched her walk away and headed to the main office. I introduced myself to the attractive African American woman behind the desk. "I'm Buffy Summers," I said. "I'm here for my first day as the new
guidance counselor?"

She smiled at me and extended her hand. "I'm Marion Kern, the principal here."

"It's nice to meet you," I replied, and we shook hands.

She came around the desk. "A record number of students are in our freshman class this year, so we're so pleased to have you join us." She led me down the hall and stood in front of an open door. "Here is your office. If you have any questions or concerns, please feel free to come and see me. I look forward to working with you, Buffy." She smiled warmly and walked away.

"Miss Summers," announced the nameplate on the door. I walked inside and sat down behind the desk. A calendar hung on the wall. "Staff Conference," "Safe Sex Conference," Anti Drug Conference," "Safety Conference," were some of the appointments listed in small, tidy handwriting. A knock came at the door, and I turned to see an elderly lady, her hair pulled into a soft white bun.

"You must be Miss Summers," she said warmly. "I'm Midge, your
secretary."

"Pleasure to meet you," I said.

"I hope you don't mind that I marked your calendar," she said. "I also typed up your schedule for today and placed it on your desk, and your student folders are arranged alphabetically in your drawer. If
you need anything, just give me a ring." She turned to step away. "Oh, and Mr. Smeck, your supervisor, is at a seminar today, so your meeting with him will take place tomorrow. I'll bring you a cup of coffee before your Staff Orientation meeting. Cream and sugar?" she asked.

"Just cream, thanks," I replied.

"Please let me know if you need anything," she said.

I looked over my files, calendar, and schedule, and turned on my computer. Welcome back to Sunnydale High! scrolled across my screen.


*~*~*~*~*~*



"So you don't do anything?" Xander said incredulously. I handed him a wet dish and he dried it with the towel.

"I just went to meetings all day," I explained. "I watched slides, and filmstrips, and took notes when people talked. People handed me forms, and I gave them to Midge to do. I didn't talk to a single student all day."

"Sounds a lot better than ordering around a bunch of big, sweaty men," he replied with a smile.

We put away the dishes and went into the living room. Xander and I sat on the couch and turned on the TV. I pulled an afghan over my legs and settled back into the pillows as he channel surfed.

Dawn came back downstairs, bearing a clipboard and a stack of catalogues. She took the remote away from Xander and slid between us, plopping her feet on his lap as she leaned against my shoulder. "Got some homework, Dawnie?" asked Xander.

Dawn shook her head. "Anya wants me to look through these catalogues and select some inventory for the grand reopening on Halloween." She smiled. "I get to pick out decorations, candles, stuff like that for
the shop."

"I think it's great that she's entrusting you with a responsibility like that, Dawn," I told her. "You've proven yourself to her this summer, and I'm really proud. Helping her through the insurance claims and the construction was a huge help. I think you've really made things easier for her."

She smiled at me and flipped to the Powerpuff Girls. "Chicks fighting evil," Xander commented. "How lame."
He squealed like a girl when Dawn smacked him with the remote.


*~*~*~*~*~*



My sister danced with a demon, her smile wide as they moved to the beat of the music. I finished off my virgin daiquiri and took out the small paper umbrella, twirling it in my fingers. The rap music ended and the band began a slow love song, and Dawn and Clem came off the dance floor.

The noise of the crowd at the Bronze was really loud, with Totally 80's night in full swing. Dawn finished off her drink, tipping back the pineapple that held it as far as it could go. Clem leaned forward and said something to me, but I couldn't understand him. "What?" I shouted, leaning forward. He smiled at me and gestured with his fingers, mimicking two pairs of legs dancing and pointing at me. Xander and Willow came back to the table and sat down, and I went to the dance floor with Clem.

The band was playing their hearts out, managing to belt out the words to a cheesy Air Supply song without laughing. I moved into Clem's arms and rested my head on his shoulder, his hand resting gently on my hip. He'd managed to dig up a red leather jacket decorated with zippers and studs, and I moved my cheek to avoid poking myself in the eye with one. "I'm all out of love, I'm so lost without you," sang the guitarist. I closed my eyes and inhaled the scent of leather, enjoying the feel of strong arms around me. I was overwhelmed with a wave of longing for Spike, so intense my chest felt tight. "I can't be too late to say that I was so wrong," the song continued.

Clem and I danced together slowly, his presence soothing and welcome as I let myself relax. The room was dark, the music was loud, and no one was paying any attention to me. It was freeing, to be anonymous, but not alone. It was nice to have someone to lean on, even if he wasn't the one that I wanted.

The bouncy strains of Oingo Boingo began to play and Clem and I broke apart. Clem did an impression of a pogo stick, staying in one place and bouncing to the music. He started laughing and held my hands, pulling me so that we were doing the same thing. Couples around us noticed and followed suit, until the entire dance floor was filled with laughing people, jumping up and down and singing along with the song.

I looked across the room and there, underneath the stairway, was Spike. Time seemed to slow down, the noise of the crowd fading. He turned away, pushing his way through the crowd to the exit. I shoved through the crowd, finally reaching him in the doorway of the club.

"Spike," I said loudly, knowing that he could hear me underneath the background noise of the crowd.

"Slayer," he said as he turned to face me, his lips curling into a
sardonic grin.

"Where were you? Where did you go?" I closed my hand around his, my body heating at his touch. I missed you so much. I was worried about you.

"I went to get a gift for a lady," he said, his tone impossible for
read.

"For me?" I said in disbelief. He wouldn't meet my eyes, just looked out past my head, watching the crowd. "For – Anya?" He rolled his eyes and turned away, taking his hand from mine.

A scream pealed out in the alley. "That's your cue," said Spike. "See you around, pet." He slipped away into the darkness. I ran out into the alley after him, and the scream rang out again behind me. I pivoted and crashed a stake into the back of a vamp. His body dusted, revealing a scared looking girl.

"Janice?" I said in disbelief. "You're really slow on the uptake. Vampires. Are. Bad."

"Don't tell my mom," she begged.

"Oh, you are so busted," I informed her, as I took her arm and led her back inside.


*~*~*~*~*~*



I walked through the cemetery, trying to find Spike. I'd been searching since I left the Bronze, after taking Dawn and Janice safely home. I'd walked for over an hour now, fruitlessly. I knew he had to be here somewhere close; the hairs on the back of my neck stood up, my body tingling. I walked up the steps to a crypt and sat down, rubbing my eyes.

"Good thing I'm not in the mood for a snack," Spike said wryly. I looked up and he was standing in front of me, his dog sitting at his heels. "I'd been a real big bad, you'd be a midnight snack."

"I've been looking for you," I told him. "We need to settle things
between us."

"What's done is done," he said. "We've both made choices, done things that can't be swept under the rug." I stood up and the dog echoed my movement, a low growl in his throat. "No point, really, in singing a duet of the same old song."

"I've already been waiting months for the chance to tell you how I feel," I said impatiently.

"I know that you hate me." He pulled a pack of cigarettes from his pocket and lit one. "Evil. Disgusting. Got it."

"I don't hate you," I explained. "What you did to me, it wasn't right, but I understand what drove you to it. The way I treated you was wrong."

"I thought that I could make it up to you," he explained. "I thought if I could prove myself, do the right thing by you, maybe you'd be able to let me in. To trust me, and then love me." He inhaled hard on his cigarette, his cheekbones prominent. "But it all went wrong." He tossed the cigarette into the bushes.

"What went wrong?" I asked.

"Doesn't matter now," he said. "I came back to Sunnydale to get help from someone, and she's gone. Should have known this whole thing was cursed from the start. Time to cut my losses and move on."

"You're leaving Sunnydale?" I exclsimed, stunned. "But you just got
back!"

Spike looked down at me, but his eyes didn't meet mine. I put my hand on his cheek, and turned his head. His eyes were as beautiful as ever, a soft, lush blue. I could feel the tension in his body at my touch, and my heart raced as my face neared his. He sighed quietly, and then his mouth was covering mine.

I'd forgotten how he tasted- clove cigarettes and a subtle undertone of something spicy. His hand tightened on my shoulder and I put my arm around his waist. The feel of his body was as familiar as my own, and I wanted to claim it, to make it mine.

Abruptly, he pushed me away, and I stumbled backwards. "This isn't what I came for, Buffy," he said, his voice strained. "I didn't come back here for another round of shag the Slayer in the cemetery."

"I don't want things to be the way they were before," I said, my voice coming out higher and shriller than I wanted. "I want things to be different. I love-"

"Don't," he said, holding up his hand. "Christ, please don't make it any worse."

"How could it be worse?" I asked him. "We've been through the worst, and the only way to go from here is up. I need you at my side. I need you as my lover, as my friend, watching my back-"

He laughed a harsh painful sound. "Nice timing, love."

"I do," I assured him. "Spike, I need you."

"You need what I was," he said, his eyes looking past me. "Not what's left of me now." Sorrow clouded his features and he turned away.

"This is ridiculous, Spike!" I told him as I stepped around him, blocking his path.

His dog stared up at me, amber eyes glinting in the darkness. I looked up at Spike, but he still wasn't meeting my eyes, instead gazing over my head. Suddenly, my heart began to pound. Slowly, I moved my hand and waved it in front of his face. He didn't flinch, didn't track my movements.

Spike was blind.




TBC...




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