Crushed



Written by: Desire
Author's Website






Summary: Set in season 5. Ever wondered what it would be like if Buffy was the one to realize she had feelings for Spike instead of the other way around? No, okay…just me then ;D. This product of my diluted mind answers that question and in a lot of ways is a re-w
Disclaimer: The show Buffy the Vampire Slayer and all of it's characters belong to Joss, Mutant Enemy, & Fox Prod.
Feedback: evildesire182@hotmail.com






Chapter One
 


For a split second, she thought about stealing a few tongue depressors.

There they were all piled in that jar along the counter. Did they really need so many? What the hell were they for anyway, it’s not like she ever heard a doctor race down the corridors screaming ‘Nurse we need more tongue depressors stat!’. They were virtually useless in her opinion, thus making them ripe for nicking…

Hey, with her mom not feeling so well she was on Dawn duty practically twenty-four seven and who knows, Dawn could come down with some germy school related illness only kids her age seem to get, and she might need a tongue depressor. Whatever the hell they were used for.

Buffy’s hand deftly reached out for the jar, her fingers gripping the top of the paper covered wood.

“And here he is!”

Startled, she quickly dropped the offending object back in the jar, turning around to face the nurse who was very carefully helping Riley out of the wheelchair and onto the edge of the bed. Buffy smiled, putting on her best ‘I’m not a klepto’ face.

“He sure was asking about you,” the woman smiled at her. “You’ve got a good one here.”

The Slayer chuckled, making her way over to her boyfriend, telling the nurse ‘thanks’ with a friendly smile as she made her way out of the room.

Admittedly she was nervous. She had never seen him so sick, he could have died and that fact combined with the sterile air of the hospital sent another chill down her spine.

She slowly moved in between his legs, placing a gentle hand over his heart.

“All better?”

“Good as new.”

Riley smiled, placing his hand over hers. For a moment, a flash of anger overwhelmed her. They wouldn’t be here in this hospital, surrounded by death and sickness—and needles if he didn’t feel as if he had to play Superman. She didn’t want a Superman. Couldn’t he understand that?

Buffy pushed away the desire to yell and scream and kick Riley’s ass until it was a brand new shape, and decided instead on giving him a loving kiss on the forehead.

“Yeah, no thanks to Spike,” she sighed heavily, just the mere mention of his name causing a scowl to form on her face.

“Buffy, we’re not gonna start this again are we?”

“You could have died because of him!”

“I’m fine,” Riley said wrapping his arms around her. “Buffy, I’m fine…”

“Lately his bleached, bony ass has been there every time I turn around! Wanting money, or blood, or one of those stupid blooming onion things! Every where I look there’s Spike lighting up a cigarette, willingly giving every breathing being cancer, and that stupid accent with those annoying pet names…”

Riley merely smiled, letting her rant. It did bother him a little that Spike seemed to come up one way or another, well it was always in the form of various complaints, but he was sick here, you’d think his girlfriend would talk about anything else besides another guy.

“Plus, who the hell would date Harmony?! Okay, so she is an improvement over Drusilla with the whole not being crazy thing, but Harmony? I mean, even when Xander decided to date someone cheap and vapid, he didn’t go for Harmony!”

**************************************

Big hair, it was always big hair.

He couldn’t understand why these bints found this sort of thing attractive, teased hair, big boobs, it made them look fake. Then again porn really wasn’t about the realism.

He sighed loudly, taking a swig from the bottle of Jack Daniels in his left hand. Maybe he shouldn’t have kicked Harm out for the night after all, he grumbled a little, shifting as the video began to have the desired affect on him.

It seemed like the second his fingers made it to his zipper, the crypt door swung open, clanging loudly against the side of the wall. Shit! It never failed, the minute he was about to get any type of pleasure and enjoyment out of his un-life there was the Slayer waiting to bust up the party.

He knew it was her without even turning around to give her a look. He could smell her, the confidence, power, self righteousness, and vanilla body wash. She’d finally come to do him in; he expected it after Soldier Boy almost met his end today…

Ah, what the hell did he care, it’s not like he had anything to live for. Sodding chip, sodding Harmony…if he was going to die tonight, at least he’d go with the memory of seeing Wonder Bread collapsing to his knees in pain. Now that one was going to send him laughing all the way to hell…

“Should of known you’d show up,” he sighed, putting the bottle down as he climbed to his feet. Buffy glared at him, stake firmly in hand, making her way towards him.

Spike laughed mockingly, placing his hand over his heart. “Do your worst, Slayer,” He grabbed his shirt, yanking it over his head, letting it fall to the ground with a soft plop. He inched closer towards her in a predatory sort of way, despite the fact he was the one being hunted.

“There,” Spike grinned. “I’ve made it easy for you.”

“You son of a bitch. Riley could have died!”

“My heart bleeds. Really, where would you be without our dear commando to give you five minutes of the missionary position night after night.”

“I should have killed you years ago,” Buffy growled, the wood threatening to break under her grip.

He sneered, stretching his arms out wide in an almost comedic grand gesture. “Go ahead, luv! No one’s stopping you!”

She lunged, getting ready to finally put a stake through his annoying heart, but was quickly stopped by his hand. Spike overpowered her, managing to loosen her grip on the weapon, letting it fall to the ground. Buffy struggled in his arms, still trying to fight him tooth and nail as his lips crushed down on hers.

In a matter of seconds she forgot who she was and why this was wrong. The only thing that mattered was the feeling coursing through her as his tongue slipped past her lips, as his hands roved her body…

Spike tore his lips away from hers, immediately placing them on the soft golden skin of her neck. “God, I want you.” He rasped in between kisses and nips at her flesh.

“I want you too…” she whispered, “I love you, Spike. God I love you…”

****************************

Buffy gasped loudly as she jerked awake, startling Riley beside her. He smiled warmly at her, sliding a hand across the seat to capture her own.

“Bad dream?”

She nodded, her mouth slightly agape. God, if she didn’t close her mouth a puddle of drool would start forming at her feet…

“You alright back there, Buff?” Xander called, turning around briefly to glance in the backseat.

“Yeah,” she mumbled, “just peachy.”

Oh god, please no…






Chapter Two


“Did you ever stop to consider my feelings?! Hmmm? No, no I didn’t think so, cause you see Monky, I’m like a fish out of water. I’m thrust into this world where you’ve got a bunch of humans running around like disease-bags with flesh, with their double quarter pounders, and Jerry Springer. It’s a hell hole!”

She stopped her pacing, considering the trembling man tied to the chair before her. A smile crossed her face as she leaned towards him, stroking his cheek.

“All I want is to go home, and I can’t get in the front door, if I don’t have my key, you know what I’m saying?”

He screamed in pain as she forcefully ripped the duct tape off of his mouth.

“Now, where’s my key.”

*************************

Stupid dream.

That’s all it was, a stupid meaningless dream. One of those late-night tricks the mind plays on you when you’re both physically and emotionally exhausted. Plus, though she hated admitting it, she did have Spike on the brain in that ‘I’m so gonna kill you’ sort of fashion, yeah, maybe that’s why she dreamt all of that up.

A loud grunt escaped her lips as she flew directly into the ‘No Trespassing’ sign. Okay, so maybe now was a good time to concentrate on not getting killed.

“I’ve always wanted to kill a Slayer.”

Buffy rolled her eyes at the scraggly haired vamp before her. Jeez, you’d think these guys would come up with something original every now and again. If she had a nickel for every time some mealy-mouthed vampire told her ‘I’ve always wanted to kill a Slayer’, then she’d have---a lot of nickels, not much time to do the math bit she decided as she kicked the vamp away, sending him sprawling hard on the concrete.

“And I’ve always wanted a pony…”

She quickly drove the stake through its heart, stepping back as it exploded into dust before her.

“Funny how we don’t always get what we want,” she grinned, dusting off fang-breaths particles from her brand new outfit. One of these days she would stop patrolling in newly acquired clothes, vampire dust was just damn hard to get out of them.

“Hey!”

Startled, Buffy quickly turned around, wincing as the bright flashlight shone in her eyes. A balding security guard was fast approaching, his trusty nightstick in hand.

“Can’t you read?! It says ‘No Trespassing’,” he tapped the sign for effectiveness.

“Sorry,” she grinned sheepishly. “I was just passing through and…”

“Yeah, well head on back,” he cut her off in a clipped, weary voice. “I don’t get paid nearly enough to keep you kids from coming around here.”

“Right,” Buffy mumbled, secretly wishing she had left that vamp here to take a chunk out of rent-a-cops fat ass.

“Hey, kid!” he called back, running up to her. “Don’t forget your…glow thing,” he handed her a glowing orb, looking at her strangely. “Is that some kind of rave thing? If there’s drugs in there I’m gonna have to call the cops…”

“No! No, drugs. Just the latest in glow-stick technology.”

What the hell was this thing?!

***************************

Buffy stared at the glowy orb thing sitting on her dresser, as she climbed into bed. Great, as if she didn’t have enough on her plate already with classes, her mom, Riley, the one woman wrecking crew also known as Dawn, her slayer duties, and not to mention her latest severely disturbing dream, she’s now got deal with the mystery that is the glowing orb…thing.

She sighed loudly, settling down into bed. Well, it’s just one more thing for Giles to ‘ooh and uh-huh’ over, she’d worry about it in the morning.

I want you too…I love you, Spike, god I love you.

Buffy’s eyes flew open as she bolted upright.

Hell, she didn’t need sleep, she wasn’t that tired. She quickly threw the covers back, scrambling out of bed.

A jumpstart on the day sounds nice. Yep, she would make lots and lots of coffee and never go back to sleep again.

****************************

“Are you okay, Buffy?”

Riley stared rather intently at his girlfriend as they made their way through the cemetery. She had seemed so tired all day, lacking focus. Add in the fact that she had barely spoken two words to him, and he was more than a little worried.

“Huh?” Buffy asked, shaking away yet another thought Spike related. This has got to stop, this has got to stop…

“I asked if you were okay? You seem a little distracted.”

“I’m good. I’m just—should you be here? I mean, you’re not up to your full strength…”

“You need the help,” he stated simply, offering her a smile. “I’ll go patrol the other side of the cemetery, are you good alone?”

“Yeah,” she chuckled, “go kill something lurky for me.”

She watched as Riley’s form disappeared among the headstones and monuments before turning herself in the other direction. With a heavy sigh she was on her way, hating herself more and more with every step. She knew where she was heading and for the life of her couldn’t stop her feet from taking her there.

****************************

“Bloody hell…”

Spike lit up his cigarette grumbling louder with each step. The last thing he wanted after coming home from a night of drinking and watching all the people he wish he could bite, was to see the fucking Slayer loitering about his home.

“Don’t you have cousins of mine to kill? Puppies and old ladies to save?”

He scowled at her, purposely blowing smoke in her face. Buffy coughed lightly, giving him a scowl of her own. Suddenly, she was reminded just why she disliked him so very much, but on the other hand found it incredibly hard to stop staring at the outline of his muscles underneath the tight, black shirt he wore.

“Hello to you too,” she rolled her eyes, crossing her arms over her chest.

“What do you want, Slayer?”

“Want?! I don’t want anything, especially from you! I’m, I’m doing my job here…” she stuttered, furiously racking her brain for a lie to tell him. “I can stand anywhere I want in this cemetery and just because I happened to choose to stand in front your crypt doesn’t mean I want anything from you or was waiting to see you…it’s a free country. And I never really liked you anyway, and you really need to stop dying your hair, cause that look is so 80’s.”

Buffy turned, swiftly stalking off in the other direction. Her legs couldn’t get her away fast enough. That’s it, she’d gone insane. Completely insane! Like she would ever stand outside of Spike’s crypt hoping to catch a glimpse of him like some groupie…

But she was standing outside his crypt hoping to catch a glimpse of him like some groupie.

A heavy sigh escaped her lips as she spotted Riley heading towards her. God, this can’t be happening. It was a stupid dream that meant absolutely nothing!

Spike is vile, disgusting, annoying, evil, sexy as all hell with a body to die for…

Okay, so maybe it wasn’t just a stupid dream after all.







Chapter Three


Buffy’s eyes fluttered open briefly, the harsh lights forcing them to quickly close again. She could hear the rustling of her many faceless classmates around her, great, she had snored her way through class again for the third time this week.

She hadn’t had a decent night’s sleep since that night at the hospital. It seemed like every time she closed her eyes there he was with a cigarette and a smirk. They were always engaged in some battle of the ages, each fight violent and passionate always took a sharp turn, the results leaving her with the overwhelming need for a cold shower or moaning in the middle of a lecture as she so embarrassingly did on Monday.

Buffy yawned widely, finally gathering up the strength to open her eyes. She flashed a friendly smile at the girl next to her, preparing to ask if she could borrow her notes again.

“Maybe you should try actually staying awake for once,” she said haughtily, thrusting the papers in Buffy’s hand.

She could feel a scowl forming on her face, and Buffy pushed down the overwhelming need to call her something really nasty. Of course the insults might help if she could actually remember the girl’s name…

“Thanks,” Buffy called back lamely, climbing to her feet.

Bitch.

Nothing like a silent, universal insult…

******************************

“Why do I have to leave?! This is my house and just cause mom’s not here…”

Buffy sighed heavily, sidestepping her screaming little sister in the hall, heading down the stairs. Dawn had been effectively making her ears bleed ever since she’d gotten home. First it was over the disappearance of the last Pop-Tart, next came the threats of bodily harm over a few ‘missing’ CDs of the boy-band variety from her collection. Lastly, once Buffy told her she would need the house to herself for some very important slaying related business; Dawn went off again, wailing like a mad woman.

“Xander’s taking you out,” she said quickly, hoping that would be enough to shut Dawn up.

The youngest Summers stopped dead in her tracks, a smile forming on her lips. “Oh, well…yeah, that’s cool,” she stammered, a sudden look of dread sweeping over her features. “Oh god, I’ve got to find something to wear!”

Buffy chuckled softly as she watched Dawn practically fly up the stairs, the bedroom door slamming loudly in her wake.

When all else fails with Dawn, exploit the hell out of the Xander crush.

She could feel every muscle in her body tense all at once as the front door eased open. She was the one who had asked him to come over to help her out, yet she had dreaded it more than she would like to admit. Riley loved her, they had a good thing going and she wasn’t about to ruin that because of a few fantasies starring none other than Spike…

He smiled, setting down the bag of supplies, sweeping her up into his arms. “Hey you.”

“Hey yourself,” Buffy said, smiling back forcefully. Suddenly, craning her neck just to give him a kiss had become most irritating.

“I knew it!” Dawn shouted, glaring down at the couple from the top of the stairs. “You just wanted to get rid of me so you guys could have sex!”

Buffy rolled her eyes, slipping out of Riley’s arms. “Dawn!”

“I am so telling mom.”

Riley placed a loving had on Buffy’s shoulder, giving her a warm smile as he picked up the brown paper bag. “I’ll go take this upstairs.”

Dawn rolled her eyes at him as she passed by, god she hated it when he called her ‘Squirt’. Her frown quickly vanished once Xander appeared in the doorway, in all of his sexy Hawaiian-shirt glory.

“Hey, Buff. Ready to go, Dawnie?”

Dawn smiled dreamily, rocking back on the balls of her feet. “Uh-huh.”

Eh, there’s plenty of time to be mad at Buffy later…

***********************************

“So what’s this spell again?” Riley asked, sitting down on the bed. Buffy emptied the bag, dumping the incense, powders, and other magical talismans on the carpet.

“Tirer la couture,” She said, taking a seat on the floor.

“ ‘Pull the curtain back’.”

She gave him a sidelong glance, shaking her head. “Am I the only one who thought it meant ‘rotate many foodstuffs’,” she sighed. “It’s a spell to see spells, Anya says. Hopefully it’ll tell me what kind of mojo’s been worked on my mom.”

Riley chuckled softly, “So, Galinda, what do I do?”

“Well…” Buffy began, kicking herself mentally for asking him to do this in the first place. She felt so uncomfortable around him, especially with her earlier dream still playing vividly in her mind’s eye. “There’s incense that needs to be lighted…oh, and the sand, someone’s got to pour the sand. It’s gotta be poured around me in a circle, counter clockwise…”

“So you need me to light incense and pour sand?”

“Magic incense….and spooky sand…” she stumbled, feeling slightly embarrassed and ashamed at the look on Riley’s face.

“It’s okay, Buffy,” he sighed loudly, climbing to his feet. “You don’t have to make me feel needed one hundred percent of the time. I know there’s some things you can handle on your own,” Riley bent down, placing a soft kiss on her forehead. “As long as you’re not planning on getting rid of me.”

“No! No, I’m not, getting rid of you!” she practically shouted, scrambling to her feet. “Riley, how could you think that?!”

He gave her a look, putting both hands on her shoulders in reassurance. “Buffy, I was only kidding. Why don’t we do the spell tomorrow, together.”

“Just don’t think that, okay,” she said softly, wrapping her arms around him. “You’re the only one I want to be with.”

************************************

Buffy cried out as her back slammed against the door, her scream a mixture of pleasure and pain. His lips were on hers almost instantly. She moaned into the kiss as she felt his smooth hand glide underneath her skirt, his nimble fingers inches away from their destination…

Spike broke the kiss, giving her a knowing smile. “Is this for me, Slayer,” The words barely above a heady whisper, sent tingles down her spine and another jolt of arousal to her core.

“Of course,” She smiled, playfully kissing him. “You’re the only one I want to be with.”


Buffy’s eyes fluttered opened as she felt his arm tighten around her waist, and she snuggled up to him, deciding it was best to play the doting girlfriend and forget her dreams from the thousandth time.

“The only one I want to be with…” she said with a heavy sigh, finally allowing herself to go back to sleep.



Continued...


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