Buffy stared at the beautiful blond vampire sleeping on her couch.  If someone had told her at this time yesterday that she would be letting Spike stay in her home with both her and Dawn on an indefinite basis, Buffy would have laughed her ass off.  But here she was about to do just that.

“Spike!  It’s 4:30!  Look alive!”

Spike growled and mumbled something about the sun not being down yet.  Buffy dipped her finger into the mug of warm blood she’d prepared for him and smeared a drop of it on his lips.  Spike smiled and licked the blood off.

Opening his eyes, he saw the Slayer’s crimson stained finger hovering above his mouth.  He raised his head and slowly took her entire finger into his cool mouth.  As he sucked her finger clean, Buffy shuddered at the feel of his tongue on her fingertip.

*  OK, I really shouldn’t think that this is in anyway erotic.  *

Spike let her finger go and then grasped her wrist, placing a soft kiss into the palm of her hand.

*  OK, never mind, I should definitely think this fits into the erotic category.  *

“Lovely appetizer Ms. Summers.  Are you planning on giving me all that blood in the mug one drop at a time?”

“Uh, no.  I think it would be easier if you just drank it.”

Buffy handed him the yellow “Kiss the Librarian” mug.  Spike looked at it with a smirk on his face.  “You want me to drink this in the bathtub too?”

Buffy rolled her eyes at him.  “No.”

“’Cause if you want to chain me to the plumbing again, I’d be happy to oblige.”

“Just drink your supper and meet me in my room when you’re done, all right?”

“Oh my, now that sounds interesting.”

“Don’t get all excited!  Just come up when you’re done.  And don’t forget to rinse out the mug.”  Buffy walked away from him and up the stairs.

“Yes, ma’am.”  Spike drained the mug in just seconds and followed her quickly.

When he reached the Slayer’s room he found it to be virtually empty.  Spike looked at Buffy standing on a chair hanging black curtains.  “What are you doin’, luv?”

“I’m hanging curtains.”

“I can see that.  But why?  And why is your room practically empty?”

“I’ve moved all my clothes and other stuff into Mom’s old room.  This room is the only one in the house that doesn’t catch the morning sun.  So I figured, some black curtains, maybe a Sex Pistols poster on the door and you can call it home.”

“This is for me?  You’re giving me my own room?”

“Well, it’s no dingy, dusty, clammy crypt, but . . .”

“Thank you.”

Buffy jumped down from the chair. “You’re welcome.”

She walked towards the door to leave him alone in his new room, but Spike grasped her arm gently and pulled her to him.  He delighted in the warmth of her small body against his.

Her arms wrapped around his waist and she looked up into his face.  He was searching those hazel eyes of hers for some sort of sign that it might be all right for him to pull her into that bed and show her just how thankful he was for her gift.  Just as he leaned in to kiss her mouth, she pulled away.

“Um . . .  I have to go meet Dawn at the magic shop.”  She turned to leave him behind.

“Slayer, when are we going to talk about this?”

Buffy stopped in her tracks and without looking back at him shook her head.  “I just can’t talk about it right now.”

Spike’s anger rose up in his throat.  “Why the Hell not?  Now is as good a time as any.  Or do you want to wait until another shape shifting demon comes along as an ice breaker between us?”

Buffy spun around and put her body into her typical Slayer defense mode.  *  Nothing ever changes with him!  He just pushes and pushes!  *

Spike cocked his head to the side and crossed his arms in front of him mirroring her body language.  “I didn’t ask you before because I thought it was embarrassing enough for you, but I just have to know about last night.”

Buffy covered her face with her hands.  “Oh God!  Don’t start!”

Spike laughed at her.  “What did he say, pet?  What did he do to you that made you . . .”

Buffy held up her hand to silence him.  “Stop it!  I don’t know!  He caught me in a moment of weakness!”

“Damn it, Slayer!  That’s my bleedin’ job description!  I’m supposed to be there for your moments of weakness, it’s what I do!  Buffy’s weak?  I’m there!”

“Yeah, you’re real good at that.”  Buffy hissed back at him.

“Well, I guess we’re both guilty of dabbling around with a doppelganger now, aren’t we?”

Buffy raised her finger accusingly at the cocky vampire.

“Do not bring up the robot!  I’ll have nightmares – again.”

“But it’s the same thing.”

“No it is not!  I didn’t create him.”

“Didn’t you?”

Buffy’s expression quickly melted from anger to defeat.  She walked to the bed and sat down listlessly.  “You know, for de-fanged vampire you sure still know how to make it hurt, don’t you?”

Spike felt his cold heart start to ache with guilt for making her so upset – again.  *  I’m such a bleedin’ idiot!  *

Buffy sighed heavily.  “Sometimes I wish you didn’t have that chip in your head anymore.  That way you could just hit me.  In fact, I think I would prefer that kind of pain instead of this.”

Spike slowly moved towards the bed and knelt in front of her.  “Buffy, I’m, I’m sorry.  I just can’t help it, I’m so used to being very confrontational with you.  And I shouldn’t be.  I mean, what the Hell do I have to complain about anyway?  I got the invite and this lovely corner suite to boot.”

“Spike, we will talk about this soon.  I promise.  I just need to go get dinner and pick up Dawn right now.”

“Get dinner?  But you’ve got a ton of food downstairs.”

“I don’t feel like cooking.”

“Well, don’t waste money.  Just go and get Dawn.  We’ll worry about dinner when the two of you get back.”

“But if I don’t feed her the minute we get home she get all cranky.  It’s very annoying.”

“Never mind the Nibblet.  I’ll whip her into shape.”

Buffy scowled at him questioningly.

“Well, I didn’t mean whip her literally.”

Buffy reached out and grabbed his hand, giving it a squeeze.  Spike looked at her face and was pleased at the smile that was forming on her pouty lips.  “All right, Slayer, go.”

Spike picked up her hand and gave it a quick kiss.

“I should be back in a couple hours.”  Spike nodded and moved out of the Slayer’s way.  Buffy exited the room quickly and headed downstairs.

Spike flopped himself down on his new bed.  The Slayer’s old bed, the one where she used to sleep every night.  The same bed he’d seen her sleeping in the night he came to rat out Soldier Boy.  And she’d been naked.  Spike rolled over on his stomach and buried his face into the pillow.  The scent of Buffy was surrounding his senses.  It didn’t matter how many times you washed the sheets, he could still smell her shampoo, her body lotion, her sweat, even her blood.  Spike could feel his jeans grow tighter at the thought of Buffy naked in this bed with him.  He wrapped his arms around the pillows and hugged them tightly.

“I’m drowning in you Summers, I’m drowning in you.”

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Xander Harris banged away at the Summers’ residence’s doorframe.  He didn’t see Spike descend the stairs with a very grumpy look on his face.

“Hey Mate!  You’re making enough noise down here to wake the dead, literally.”

Xander shuddered at the sound of the vampire’s voice.  “What are you doing here?”

“Taking a nap.  Buffy said I could stay, I was invited.”  Spike gave the young man his best evil grin.

Xander shook his head and looked back at his work.  “What is it with you vampires and structural damage?  This is the second time I’ve had to fix something your body went crashing through.”

“Yeah well, you would’ve went crashing through too if you’d seen what I’d seen last night.”

“Oh yeah, Riley making out with Buffy.  Like you’ve never seen that before.”

“Not Riley, you imbecile, a demon who looked like Riley.  Get it straight!  He was going comprise the Slayer’s virtue, poor thing.  Like she needs another disappointment in the romance department.”

“Oh and you’re the one to help her out with that are you?”

“Just fix the bloody door before I . . .”

Xander jumped at the opening.  “Before you what?  Smack me and fall on the floor writhing in pain?  Go ahead.”

Spike had about a dozen or so insults he could throw back at the carpenter, but he decided it was time to put this barely tolerant relationship he had with this boy to the test.  “What time is it, Mate?”

Xander looked at his watch.  “I’m not your mate and it’s six thirty.  Why?”

Spike smiled and turned on his heel.  “It’s Happy hour.”

Spike left Xander and disappeared into the kitchen.  When he returned he was carrying two bottles of Killian’s Red.  Spike stayed at arms length from Xander to avoid the blazing sunset coming through the open door and held out a bottle of cold beer to him.

Xander looked at him warily and took the bottle from him.  “Thanks.”

“You’re welcome.”  Spike sat on the stairs away from the direct sunlight and took a sip of his beer while Xander tried unsuccessfully to open his beer.

“Got a bottle opener?  This one’s not a twist off.”

Spike took the bottle from Xander and vamped out.

Xander scowled at the sight of Spike’s face and stepped farther away from him.

Spike used his fangs to bite the top off of the beer bottle.  The moment the cap was free Spike’s face returned to its human form and he spit the bottle cap directly into a wastebasket over ten feet away.

Xander took his beer back from Spike.  “That’s quite a skill you’ve got there, you ought to put that on your resume.”

“Yeah, I can put it in the special skills category right under slashing and bashing.”

“I cannot believe Buffy is letting you stay here.”

“Neither can I.”

Xander ignored Spike and went back to finishing the work on the door.  “Hand me those screws over there will ya?”

Spike cocked his head at the young man and raised his eyebrow.

Xander sighed with annoyance. “Please?”

Spike reached down and handed Xander the screws.  “Thank you.”

“You’re welcome.”

“I still hate you.”

“I know.”

“Don’t try anything funny while you’re here or I will see to it that you die a slow, painful and dusty death.”

“I try anything funny and Buffy will see to that – so don’t worry your precious little head about it, Mate.”

“Just so we’re clear.”

“Crystal clear.”

Spike got up from the stairs and headed off to the kitchen again.

“Where are you going?”

“To make dinner.  Dawn will be home soon and she’ll be hungry.  She’s as ravenous as a fledging when she hasn’t eaten.”

“Since when do you ‘cook’?”

“Since someone needed me to.”

Buffy and Spike were patrolling/strolling through the park.  Buffy watched Spike out of the corner of her eye.  She was still amazed that this “evil creature of the night” had just cooked the first decent hot meal she’d had in weeks, even if the steak was a little too rare.

          “Spike?  I just have to ask, where the Hell did you learn how to cook?”

          Spike laughed at his slayer’s question about his domestic skills.  “I watch a lot of late night television.  Hell, I watch a lot of daytime television as well.”

          “Uh huh, and that still doesn’t tell me where you learned how to cook.”

          “Well, when I get really bored I watch just about anything including cooking shows.”

“And soap operas.”

Spike rolled his eyes at her and decided not to begin to defend why he loved “Passions”.

“I started watching them way back when Julia Child was the only one doing it.  Now there’s an entire cable network devoted to the genre.  Did you ever see The Iron Chef?”

          “No, what’s that?”

          “Oh it’s bloody hilarious!  You have to see it.  They make the most disgusting food you’ve ever seen.  And then a panel of Japanese celebrities rates the food.  It’s brilliant really.”

          “And you just learned from watching?”

“Well, remember I’ve been watching television for over fifty years, Slayer.  That’s a lot of cooking shows.  Besides, I’ve always been really good at carving up flesh with a knife.”

“Eew!  That’s not a very appetizing thought.”

“Oh please!  I made steak.  I didn’t even kill the cow myself!  Give a vampire a break, luv!”

“So what else can you cook?”

“Lots of things, but I don’t do Italian though.”

“Why not?”

“Too much bloody garlic.”

“Oh, yeah.”

Spike spotted an empty bench by the fountain in the center of the deserted park.  He strode over and plopped himself down onto it, motioning Buffy to sit with him.

“So um, Slayer, is this a decent enough time for you and I to talk?”

Buffy sat next to him and fidgeted a bit.  “Um, sure.  How about you start?”

Spike took a deep unneeded breath to give himself a little courage to ask what he so wanted to know.

“OK then, I guess I just want to know, I mean you know full well how I feel and I just wanted to know if you, well, if you . . .”

Just then, two female voices shrieked in terror by the entrance to the park not fifty feet away.

Spike shook his head in disgust.  “Bloody Hell!  Always when I’m in the middle of something!”

Buffy recognized the voices.  “Oh my God!  Tara!  Willow!”

Willow screamed at the top of her lungs.  “Buffy!”

She and Tara were running at break neck speed towards them.

Buffy grabbed her axe in readiness.  “Will!  What’s wrong?”  Just as the words left her mouth, Buffy heard a loud growl and saw a large green dragon type creature stomping close behind the two witches.

Spike sprang up from the bench.  “Holy shit!  What’s that?”

Willow was dragging Tara behind her in an effort to reach Buffy and Spike.  Breathlessly she panted  “Spell!  Went bad!  Really, really bad!”

Tara was in hysterics and stuttering uncontrollably.  “We, we tr-tried, but we can-can’t seem to stop it.  Can you help us?”

Buffy and Spike lifted their axes and looked at one another.

Buffy frowned at him.  “This ought to be fun, don’t you think?”

Spike turned his attention towards the demon.  “Yeah, and afterwards we’ll get some cotton candy and ride the merry go round.”

Buffy and Spike charged the beast.

+++++++++++++++++++++++++

Sunnydale Memorial Hospital – 2 hours later

Dawn ran ahead of Xander down the hall to the emergency ward.  She caught a glimpse of Willow with her arm in a sling.  “Willow!  Where’s Buffy?”

Willow bit her lip and searched for the words.

Dawn’s face crinkled up and she began to sob hysterically.  “Where is she?  Oh God!  Not again!  No! No! No!”

Willow did her best to comfort the teenager.  “Dawn, please, calm down.  They’re treating her right now.  She’s alive.  She’s alive.”

“What happened?”

Spike’s voice came from behind Dawn, startling her for a moment.  “Demon.  Big Green Lizardy thing.”

Dawn turned to see Spike with a big blistering burn on his forehead.  “Nasty claws, poisonous venom.”  He pointed to his face.

Willow took a breath and attempted to explain.  “It spit into her eyes.  She was blinded and . . .”

Dawn gasped at the realization.  “Blinded?  Forever?”

Tara spoke as gently as she could to Dawn.  “They’re cleaning the poison out of her eyes right now and we have to wait and see what the doctors say.”

Dawn turned all of her hurt and anger on Spike.  “Why didn’t you protect her?  That’s what you’re supposed to do!  Why did you let it hurt her?”  She hit the vampire viciously.  Spike just took the blows not moving one inch from her assault.  Her fists didn’t hurt him.  It was her tears and anger that hurt him.

Willow put her hand on Dawn’s shoulder and shouted a little too loudly.  “Dawn! Dawnie!  Stop it!”

Xander reached out his arms and pulled Dawn away from Spike.

Willow regained her composure and softened her tone.  “Dawn, he saved her.”  Dawn stopped her struggling in Xander’s arms and she looked at Spike.

Spike sat down in one of the waiting room chairs and put his head in his hands.

Willow continued her story.  “He saved me and Tara, too.  After that thing spit in her face, Buffy couldn’t see.  It knocked Tara and me down and was going to eat both of us.  Spike hacked it to pieces and took us all here.”

Dawn burst into tears and sobbed.  “I’m sorry.  I was just so…”

Willow put her good arm around Dawn.  “It’s OK, everything is going to be OK.”

Just then the doctor arrived, carrying Buffy’s chart.  Spike rose to attention.  “How is she Doc?”

The doctor sighed.  “She was burned pretty badly, but we were able to get most of the poison out.  She’s on some very strong antibiotics right now and will have to stay overnight for observation.  But if we keep her free from infections, her sight could be back in 1 or 2 months.  Her blindness will not be permanent.

Dawn sighed in relief.  “Thank God!”

The doctor looked at Spike’s face.  “Sir, I really think you should have me check that out for you.”

“No thanks I’ll be fine.”

The doctor attempted to touch Spike’s face.  “But you really should . . .”

Spike flinched away from him.  “Hey!  Believe me, I’m not the one to worry about here.”

Dawn stepped forward.  “Can I see my sister now?”

The doctor shook his head.  “We have her sedated.  It’s best that she gets a good night’s rest.  You can all come back in the morning to see her.  She should be able to be released tomorrow afternoon.”

Spike shook the doctor’s hand.  “Thanks, Doc.”  The doctor stared at the cold hand now gripping his and he gave Spike a sideways look.  Spike smirked at the doctor, knowing exactly what he was thinking.  The doctor released Spike’s hand and backed away.  He turned to the rest of the group and quickly said, “Goodnight and take care.”  Spike laughed softly as the doctor scurried off down the hallway.

Xander pulled Dawn into his arms and hugged her tightly.  “Do you want me to take you home with me.  Anya can make up a bed for you and we can come back for Buffy in the morning.”

Dawn hugged Xander back and was just about to say yes when she caught a glimpse of Spike’s face.  He was so beat up again.  She didn’t want him to be alone tonight.  “No, I want to go home.  Spike?  Let’s go home.”

Xander was amazed.  “Did I miss something here?  Dawn?  You can’t stay home alone with him.”

Dawn put her little hand into Spike’s.  “Why not?  If anything evil and nasty comes to the door, something evil and nasty will be there to kick its ass. Right, Spike?”

Spike smiled down at the spunky little teenager. “Right, Nibblet.”

“See?  Don’t worry Xander.”

Spike grabs his car keys “Red, Tara, do you two need a ride home?”

Just as Tara started to answer, Xander interrupted.  “I’ll take them home.  You just make sure Dawn is up and ready to go by 8:30 tomorrow morning, in one piece.”  Xander turned and stalked down the hallway to the exit.  Willow and Tara waved to them as they quickly followed behind him.

Spike whispered to Dawn.  “Oh, I think I’m starting to grow on him, what do you think?”

Dawn grimaced.  “Like fungus maybe.”

Spike laughed and led the Slayer’s little sister out the hospital’s doors.

Dawn opened the door for Spike and watched as he limped into the house.

“OK, Little Bit, off to bed!  Xander might stake me if you’re not bright eyed and bushy tailed in the morning.”

Dawn observed Spike closely.  He was bruised and burnt and his face was contorted with pain.  It amazed her what torture he was willing to withstand just to make sure that she and her sister were all right.  This was the fourth time she’d seen him put his un-life on the line for them.  First time being the fight he’d had with the Gora demon over its eggs for the resurrection spell Dawn wanted to perform for her mother.  Then there were the hours of torture Glory had inflicted on him to get the identity of the key, to no avail.  Next, his ill fated encounter with Doc on the scaffold that had broken almost every bone in his body.  And now he was hacking up giant lizard demons to save Buffy’s life.

*  He must really love Buffy, a lot.  *

“Spike?”

“Yeah, luv?”

“Are you OK?”

“I’ll live.  Or survive at least.”

Spike took off his leather duster and hung it on the coat rack.  Dawn turned to walk up the stairs when she decided she needed to thank him for all he’d done for her.

“Spike?”

Spike turned and Dawn wrapped her arms around his waist and squeezed him.  “Thank you, so much!”

Spike groaned in pain, but still managed to softly say, “You’re welcome.”

Dawn pulled away from him and felt the wetness on her hands.  She looked at them in shock.  She was covered with blood.  “Oh my God, Spike!”

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

  Spike sat on a stool in the kitchen with a bottle of whiskey and a lit cigarette while Dawn attempted to patch up the bite marks on his back.

Dawn cringed at the site of all his blood running like a river down his back.  “I cannot believe you didn’t say anything about this!  I mean - how stupid are you?”

“You know your bedside manner is about as good as your sister’s.”  He inhaled deeply on his cigarette and took a long swallow of whiskey.  “Where’d you learn how to do this?”  He asked, blowing the smoke out of his dead lungs.

“Riley actually.”

“Remind me to thank Captain America next time I see him.”

“Well, combat first aid comes in real handy when your sister comes home with gashes and bruises all the time.  She never wanted Mom to see and get worried so she’d ask me to help her hide them until they healed.  I can cover up almost anything with make up, even bite marks.”

“She get bitten a lot?”

“Sometimes, but mostly just bruises, a lot of bruises.”

Dawn finished up with her last bandage and handed Spike a clean white tee shirt with a yellow smiley face that read, “Have a Nice Day”.

“Thanks, Nibblet, but I cannot wear that.  I might have to stake myself if anyone saw me.”

“No one is going to see you!  It’s just me.”

“Nope!  Can’t do it.”

“You are impossible!  Your black tee shirt is ruined and you can’t lay around the house oozing blood all over the furniture.”

“Got a couple magic markers?”

“Yeah?  Why?”

“Go get ‘em.”

Dawn went to the utility drawer and pulled out a packet of markers and handed them to Spike.  Spike picked out the black marker and drew fangs and angry eyebrows on the smiley face.  He crossed out the word “day” and wrote “night” underneath it.  He then grabbed the red marker and drew blood dripping from the fanged smile.  “There!  Now I can wear it.”

Dawn laughed as he happily put the tee shirt on.  “Buffy’s gonna kill you when she sees what you did to her shirt!”  Then Dawn’s expression changed from gleeful to concerned, “Unless she can’t see at all.”

“Hey Platelet, I’m sorry about tonight.  You were right.  I should’ve done more to help her.  But she’s so damned stubborn.  The whole ‘I can do it myself, I’m the Slayer’ attitude.”

“It’s OK Spike.  I’m sorry I got so upset with you.  I just thought she was gone again.  I can’t deal with that, not so soon after we just got her back.”

Spike patted the girl on her shoulder.  “She’ll be fine, Dawn.  She’s very strong, she’ll pull through just fine.”

“Don’t tell Buffy this, but I’m sorta glad she’s hurt.”

Spike shook his head in disbelief.  “You don’t mean that.”

“I do.  This way she’ll be reminded that she’s a human being and she’ll have to stay home and let other people take care of her for a change.  I’m looking forward to spending more time with her like we used to when we were little.  Like when we had the chicken pox.”

“When was that?”

Dawn smiled at the memory.  “She was 13 and I was 7.  We had to stay home for two whole weeks.  We had so much fun even though we were so sick and itchy.”

Spike grabbed a packet of O positive out of the freezer and popped it in the microwave.  “I don’t remember being sick as being anything short of terrifying.”

“That’s probably because you haven’t been sick in a really long time.  How old are you anyway?”

“I’ll be 128 this April.”  Spike watched the blood as it twirled round and round on the turntable inside the microwave.  *  Ah!  Technology!  *

“You’re older than dirt!  My great grandmother lived until she was 96 and she used to tell stories about when there were no TV or microwaves.”

The microwave dinged.  “Yeah well when I was your age, there was no TV or microwaves or cars or toilets or penicillin, which is why getting sick, was so frightening.  You get a sniffle or a cough and the next thing you know you’re in a box in a church.”

“Didn’t they have doctors?”

Spike pulled his yellow Kiss the Librarian mug and drained the warm blood into it.  “Only rich people could afford doctors and even then they didn’t really know how to cure half of what people died from.”

“Were you rich or poor?”

“Can you guess?”

“Poor?”

Spike sipped his blood slowly.  “Nope, I was a rich boy.  Made my money the old fashioned way.”

“Stealing?”

“No!  I inherited it.  My father got a ‘sniffle’ when I was ten and died when I was eleven.  When I turned eighteen I was made master of the estate.”

“Were you like a duke or lord or baron or whatever?”

“A marquis.”

“What’s that?”

Spike poured a shot of whiskey into his mug.  “It’s like a duke or baron or whatever.  Just a stupid title really didn’t mean much except we got to have tea with the queen once or twice.”  He sipped the mixed drink and sighed with pleasure.

“Queen Elizabeth?”

“No darling, Victoria.”  Spike chuckled.  “Even Angelus is too young to ever have had tea with Elizabeth I.”

“So, how old were you when you died?”

“Twenty-Nine.”

“Were you married?  Did you have kids?”

“No.  Do you think I would have ended up like this had I had those reasons to live?”  Dawn shook her head.  “But I did have my mother and one sister living when I left.”

“Do you miss them?”

“I really don’t think about them very much anymore.  Being a demon makes you forget a lot of your humanity.  I mean look at how Anya still can’t get it right.”

Dawn smiled at the thought of Xander’s ex-demon fiancée.  “You got a point there.  So what were you?  What did you do for a living?”

“I didn’t have to work really, so I went to school and studied a lot.”

“Where?”

“Oxford.”  Spike shuddered at having to think about who he had been.  “Why all the questions?”

“I was just curious.  I wonder what you were like before . . .”

Spike cut her off abruptly.  “I was a snobby mediocre marquis with too much money and no sense.  I was a waste of space.  I never was any good at anything I tried.  Then I became a vampire and I got real good at being bad.”

Dawn saw through the vampire’s defense mechanism of self-hatred.  “I’m sorry.”

“What for?  I’m not.”

“I’m just sorry that your life was so sad that you had to become evil to like yourself.”

“I wasn’t - wasn’t sad.”

“You were alone, weren’t you?”

“Still am, Bite Size, that didn’t change.”

“Maybe you just need to do what you were supposed to do when you were alive and then you won’t have to be alone anymore.”

“I think it’s time for all the good little human girls to get tucked away in their beddy by’s, don’t you?”

“Where nothing can eat me?”

“Right!  Off you go.”  Dawn leaned over and kissed Spike’s cheek.  “Goodnight, Spike.”

“Sleep tight, don’t let the vampires bite.”

“Ha, ha!  You’re so funny!”

Willow unlocked the door to Buffy’s house and motioned for Xander to lead Buffy inside.  Buffy’s eyes were bandaged up with white gauze and she had a very miffed expression on her face.

Xander was holding onto her hands and leading her up the steps.  “OK Buffy, watch your step here.”

Buffy sighed in frustration.  “I can’t watch anything Xander.  But I’ve got it just fine.”  She pulled her hands out of his quickly.  “I’m fine.”

Buffy walked up the steps and through her front door, tripping slightly on the threshold.  Dawn walked past Willow and Xander into the house and muttered.  “Yeah, she’s fine.  Sure, whatever.”

Willow attempted to offer her help again to her best friend.  “Buffy, I really think one of us should stay here and help out with things around the house.”

Xander nodded in agreement.  “Yeah, Buff.  Like me or Anya can come by every other day and Willow or Tara can come by the other days and . . .”

Buffy shook her head.  “It’s OK, guys really.  Dawn will help me.  Right Dawn?”

“Yeah.  I’m not a child.  I’m perfectly capable of picking up the slack and it’s not like she’s a total invalid or something.  The only thing we’ll need help with is getting her to doctor’s appointments.”

But, what about patrols?  And what if some baddies get the 411 that the slayer is blind - temporarily?”  Xander asked.

  Spike emerged from the living room wearing a new black tee shirt Dawn had picked up for him that morning.  “Then I’ll chop their heads off and leave ‘em for the garbage men to haul away in the morning.”  Spike smiled at Dawn, but on the inside he was very concerned at the sight of his wounded Slayer.  “Hey Slayer.  How are the peepers?”

Buffy crossed her arms in front of her body uncomfortably.  “They’ve been better, but other than that, I’m really fine.”

“But what about your prescriptions and groceries?” Willow nervously interjected.

Spike snorted.  He was really beginning to wonder if they thought he and Dawn were idiots.  “Oh, like everything isn’t open 24 hours a day.  I’ll go and fetch anything they need as soon as the sun goes down.  Can you ladies wait two hours and thirty-six minutes?”

Dawn nodded to Spike and put her hand on her sister’s shoulder.  “We’ll be fine.”

Buffy smiled at her little sister.  “I’m thirsty, I’m gonna go and . . .”    Xander, Dawn, Willow and Spike all snapped to attention and simultaneously said.  “I’ll get it!”

Buffy laughed at them.  “I’ll get it.”  Buffy began to feel her way down the hall towards the kitchen and to the refrigerator.  Xander followed her a few steps behind.  She fumbled inside the refrigerator until she found the bottle of orange juice.  She popped the top and sniffed it just to make sure it was orange juice and not sour milk or blood.

Xander grabbed a glass out of the cabinet and handed it to Buffy.  “Buffy, I really don’t like leaving you alone here with . . .”

Buffy cut his speech short.  “With who?  Dawn and Spike?  Please Xander!  Gimme some credit!  I may be blind, but I’m not helpless!”

  “But what if he ya know does something creepy and you don’t know it ‘cause you can’t see him.”

Buffy giggled at her friend.  “Don’t worry, I know where he is at all times.  Watch this.”  Buffy walked back down into the living room.  She stood still for just a second and then went straight up to Spike and grabbed him by his ear and yanked.

Spike yelped in pain.  “Hey!”

“See, Xander.  I know where the demon of the house is. He can’t sneak up or spy on me without me knowing.  So chill out!”

  Dawn laughed as Spike rubbed his ear.  She knew things were going to be all right.  “So, Buffy?  Are you hungry?  We can order pizza and watch videos - or just listen to them.”

Buffy pulled her little sister into her arms.  “As long as it’s not NSYNC, sure.”

Willow and Xander looked at their friend’s smile and silently decided to leave her.

Xander tapped Buffy on the shoulder.  “Me and Willow are gonna go, but if you need anything.  I mean anything at all, please just call.

Buffy hugged her friend.  “Xander, you have nothing to worry about.  I’ll call you guys tomorrow, I promise.”

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

It had been seven days since Buffy had come home from the hospital.  Her doctors were amazed at how fast she was recovering from her injuries. A pair of dark sunglasses now replaced the white gauze that had been wrapped over her eyes in order to protect them from the light.  She had gone from completely blind to minimal vision.  Her depth perception was now off quite a bit and everything she was able to see was very blurry.

That evening she and Dawn sat on the couch in the living room.  Dawn was braiding Buffy’s hair into two pigtails as MTV played in the background.

  Dawn rambled on about her teenage love life to her big sister.  “So, Cheryl says that Kevin just took off after the soccer game last Saturday and he hasn’t even bothered to call me.  I mean, I thought he liked me.  Am I some sort of freak or something?  Do I have ‘un-datable’ tattooed on my forehead?”

“No Dawnie!  Guys are just idiots. Especially teenaged guys.”

Dawn cringed.  “Do they ever get any better?”

“No, I can’t say they do.  I mean my first real boyfriend was like over two centuries old and he was still romantically retarded.  Dawn looked at her sister in shocked silence at her admission about Angel. “Don’t ever tell anyone I said that.”

Dawn smirked.  “I won’t.”  *  I might let it slip to Spike though.  *

Spike stood at the top of the stairs listening and smiling.  “The poof retarded?  I could have told her that years ago.” He muttered to himself as he bounded down the stairs and grabbed his leather duster off the coat rack.  “Well, Ladies, I’m goin’ out.  I’ll do a quick sweep, protect the innocent, kill some beers and be back before the sun rises.”

“Buffy?  You can’t keep letting him go alone.  He should go with some backup or something.”

“Dawn, he’s a big boy, you don’t have to worry about Spike.  He’s like a cockroach, just when you think you’ve squashed him with a rock he comes crawling out from under it.”

“Lovely insect analogy, pet.”

“But what if he gets hurt or staked.”  Dawn whispered to her sister.

“Nibblet, I’ve lasted this long, no worries all right?  I mean it’s not like I have to worry about the Slayer comin’ after me or anything.”

Buffy shook her finger at the annoying vampire.  “Hey!  Knock it off!”

Dawn got up and hugged Spike.  “Just don’t come home in a dust buster ok?”

“I promise.  Bon soir, ma chere petite fille.”  Spike kissed the top of her head.

“A bientot, Guillaume.”

“Huh?  English people!  English!  You can practice the conversational French when I’m out of the house.”

“Good night Slayer.”  Spike opened the door to leave when Buffy called out to him.  “Um Spike?”

“Yes, luv?”

“Could you do me a favor?”

“Sure.”

“Ho Ho’s?”

“What?”

“Can you pick up some Ho Ho’s on your way back?”

“Yeah sure.”  Spike went to the door again when Dawn asked, “Oh and some BBQ Pringles?”

Spike sighed heavily.  “For bloody . . .do you want me to make a grocery list?  I’m going to patrol for crying out loud!”

The two sisters both pouted at him.  “Anything else, Ladies?”

Buffy smiled.  “Just some milk.  1 % Low Fat, not whole milk and not skim.”

Spike grabbed a pen off of the coffee table and began to write the list on the back of his hand.  “Ho, Ho’s, BBQ Pringles, and Milk 1 %, not skim.”

“Not whole milk either.”  Buffy added.

“Got it.  That it or do you need me to pick up some ridiculous feminine hygiene products while I’m out there as well?”

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Three hours later Spike stood in the express lane at the grocery store although there didn’t seem to be anything “express” about it.  He placed his items on the conveyor belt.  Milk - 1% low fat, BBQ Pringles, a 6-pack of Guinness, 2 packs of Marlboros, a brown paper bag with a meat department stamp on it and of course the Ho Ho’s.  He was casually flipping through the People magazine and reading about the latest news on the Tom Cruise/Nicole Kidman divorce when he heard a familiar voice behind him.

“Hey, aren’t you supposed to be patrolling?”

“Hey aren’t you supposed to be at home shagging your vengeance demon?”

Xander put his items on the conveyor belt behind Spike’s.  Spike looked at the four items - Midol, chocolate ice cream, a hot water bottle and the largest box of super absorbency tampons know to mankind.

Spike chuckled.  “Ooh!  Looks like she’s really gone back to being her old self now doesn’t it?”

“Shut up!  Just you wait. You stay in that house long enough and you’ll meet the demon that lives inside all women of child bearing age.”

“My God!  You’re even starting to talk like your girlfriend.”

“She’s not my girlfriend.  She’s my fiancée.”

“Oh yes, felicitations are in order, aren’t they?”

“Huh?”

“Con-grat-u-lations, Xan-der.  I’ll buy you a thesaurus for a wedding present because you could obviously use one.”

Spike handed his money to the cashier for his purchase. 

“Well, see you later, Harris.”

“Yeah, whatever, Evil Dead.”

Spike winked and smiled at him as he picked up his plastic groceries bags and exited the store.  Xander stared at Spike as he left.

“That will be $24.83, sir.”  Xander paid the clerk and left for home.  As he drove home to Anya he couldn’t help but worry about how Buffy was doing with Spike living in the house with her and Dawn.  There was just something so surreal about the whole situation.  This was Spike for Christ’s sake!  The guy was evil and dead and a bloodsucker.  Chip or no chip Xander just did not trust him as far as he could throw him.  Why was Buffy even tolerating him, let alone letting him stay there?  Xander decided it was time to talk about this issue with the rest of the gang.  They needed to get this out in the open and decide what was to be done about this “Spike situation.”

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

It was past midnight when Spike quietly opened the front door.  He found that Dawn was fast asleep in Buffy’s lap.  Buffy looked up at the sound of Spike entering the room.

She whispered to him.  “Hey, did you do a sweep?”

“Yeah, got two vamps and scared the hell out of a couple of teenagers who had the brilliant idea to “get it on” in the cemetery.  Bloody idiots!”

Dawn woke up at the sound of Spike’s voice.  She looked at Spike’s bags.  “Um, did you get the Pringles?”

“Yes, luv.”  Spike emptied the contents of the bags onto the coffee table.

Dawn’s stomach growled.  “Yum!  Buffy do you want a Ho Ho?”

“Yes and a glass of milk please?”  Dawn got up to get her sister a glass.

Spike popped open a Guinness and took a long swallow.  Dawn returned with a glass for Buffy and poured her some milk.

Dawn looked at the food and other “groceries” on the table.  “Who’s the Midol for?”

Spike chuckled at the realization.  “It was for Anya, but I guess Xander didn’t watch his groceries very well now did he?”

Buffy looked at Spike in amazement.  “You stole Anya’s Midol?”

“I didn’t steal it!  Xander was standing behind me in line at the store.  It must have gotten mixed in with my things.”

Buffy laughed.  “Anya’s gonna kill him if he comes home without it.”

Dawn joined her sister in giggling.  “Oh, yeah.  Remember when he came home with regular tampons instead of super?”

Buffy sipped her milk.  “Oh yeah!  That was ugly!”

Spike watched his girls as they munched on their snacks and traded Xander/Anya stories. 

“So, Buffy.  Mindy’s party tomorrow, I can go right?”  Dawn asked.

Buffy paused and thought a moment.  “Well, yeah I guess so as long as you’re home by sundown.”

“But, we were going to go the Bronze after the beach.  Kevin’s gonna be there.  I think . . .”  Dawn whined annoyingly at her sister.

“Dawn, if I was up to par on the visual front I’d say fine.  But I don’t want you out at night while the Slayer that is me can’t be out slaying.”

Spike interrupted and sat himself down next to Dawn.  “Oh, Slayer, come on!  Let her go.  I’d be happy to tag along and spend the evening with Dawn and her little friends.  I can sit right in between her and Kevin.  Get to know the chap real well.  Tell me, does he play billiards?”  Spike hugged the teenager as she continued to whine.

“Eew!  No way!  I’d rather come home early.”

Spike nodded in agreement.  “OK, then problem solved.”

Dawn sighed and got up.  “I’m going to bed.”

Buffy reached out to her sister.  “Dawnie, I’m sorry.  Please understand why I can’t let you out of my blurry sight, OK?”

Dawn became resigned to the fact that she wasn’t going to the Bronze tomorrow night.  “I know.  I understand.  I don’t like it, but I understand it.”

Dawn kissed her sister and then patted Spike on the head.  “Good night! Oh annoying evil one.”  She then quickly ran up the stairs.

Spike called after her.  “What?  No kiss?  I feel very unappreciated!”

From the second floor Spike could hear her reply.  “Sucks to be you, Spike!”

Spike sipped silently on his beer and watched Buffy as she drank some more of her milk and absently flipped through the channels.  She began to eat her chocolate cream filled snack cake.  She bit into it and then began to absently lick the cream center.  Just watching her eat was arousing Spike.  She finished the treat and then washed it down with the rest of her milk.  A tiny droplet of milk dribbled off of her lip and onto her chin.  Spike shifted uncomfortably in his seat and bit his lip as he watched her little pink tongue dart out of her mouth in search of that last bit of liquid.  She brought her finger to her chin and wiped it clean.

*  Bloody Hell!  *  Spike needed to find any excuse to touch her and fast.  “Did you put your eye drops in today?”

“Um, yeah.”

“Five times?  Because I only saw Dawn help you do it twice.”

Buffy thought for a moment.  “Oh damn!  We only did it four times.  Can you go and get them?”

“Sure, pet.  Lay down.”

Spike went to the bathroom and fetched the eye drops out of the medicine cabinet and grabbed a handful of tissues.  Spike returned to find Buffy laying on her back on the couch her pajama top was open slightly exposing her cleavage.  Spike sat next to her.  “Scoot over a little, pet.”

Buffy obeyed and Spike gently took off her sunglasses and she winced at the light coming from the lamp on the end table.  Spike turned off the light and opened up the bottle of medicine.  “Can you see to do this?”

“Of course, luv.  I’ve got some nifty night vision you know.”

He quickly dropped one drop in each eye as she hissed in pain and Spike’s chip activated sending a jolt through his head.  Simultaneously they both yelped.  “Ow!”

Spike held his head in his hand.  “Damn it!  I don’t understand it!  I didn’t intend to hurt you.  This bloody chip needs to learn the difference between want to and had to!”

Spike wiped away Buffy’s tears and helped her put her glasses back on.  “Well at least you share my pain.  Those drops are like you dropping holy water into your eyes, plus the light just drives me insane.”

Spike looked at how messy her braids had gotten and he tugged on them lightly.  “You want me to take these out? Might be more comfortable.”

“Sure.”  Spike began to work the elastic out and listened as Buffy continued to vent.  “I’m so sick of this!  It’s only been like a week and I’m ready to scream from boredom!  What am I gonna do all day tomorrow while Dawn is out sunning and funning it on the beach with her friends?”

“Well why not stay up all night with me and get good and tired.  Then you can sleep all day.”

“Oh sure.  And why don’t I just grow some fangs and get paler than I already am?”

Spike rolled his eyes at her self-pitying talk.  “Oh stop it Slayer!  You’ll be right as rain in no time.  The doctors are amazed that you can see anything at all this early into your recovery.  At this rate you’ll be perfect again within the next two weeks.”

“Sorry I’m being so whiny.  I just feel so, so. . .”

“Impotent?”

Buffy poked Spike in the ribs.  “Hey!”

“Flaccid?  Or should I say frigid?”

“Again, hey!  Watch it!”

Spike chuckled at his Slayer.  “Oh I better watch it cause you can’t watch a bloody thing!”

Buffy pushed him off the couch and pounced on him, pinning him to the carpet.  “You are cruisin’ for it, fang man!”

Dawn’s annoyed voice yelled down the stairs.  “Hey!  Some people who have lives are trying to sleep up here!”

Spike and Buffy yelled up to her.  “Sorry!”

Spike lifted his head and whispered in her ear.  “Are you going to let me up or what?”

She smirked at him.  “Why should I?”

“Cause you look ridiculous with one braid in and one braid out.”

“Fine.  Finish what you were doing. And no more comments from you about my sight or lack thereof.”

“Truce, slayer, truce.”

“Uh-huh, I’ve heard that from you before.”

Spike led her back to the couch and sat her between his legs with her back to him.  He loosened the other braid, grabbed the hairbrush from the end table and began to slowly smooth out her hair.

Buffy sighed in contentment as she felt Spike’s cool fingers run through her hair.  She felt so relaxed when he was around lately.  He was becoming more and more a comfort to her rather than a nuisance.  Their little arguments were fun and playful rather than hurtful.  She closed her tired eyes and rested her head on his shoulder.

She could get used to this kind of treatment.  She was relieved that he was there to pick up the slack.  He was so helpful.  He did all of the cooking and made sure that Dawn kept up with the cleaning.  He was the one who made all of her doctor’s appointments and scheduled either Giles or Xander to drive her there.  He was also making Dawn keep up with her studies.  They were currently working on French, Latin and the works of Shakespeare.  Buffy had been so surprised that he actually remembered any of that school stuff, but he had been around a long time.  It wasn’t like he lost his brain when he lost his soul - or his heart.  How was it that he could be soulless, but still have that heart and all the capacity to love?  It was all becoming to hard for Buffy to contemplate as she let herself forget that she was in the arms of a demon and fell into a peaceful sleep while Spike held her close.

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Willow, Tara, Anya, Xander and Giles all gathered at the reading table in the Magic Box the next morning.  The topic of discussion, as always, was slayer related. 

Giles cleared his throat and cleaned his glasses.  “Xander, I’m sure you must be mistaken.  You cannot mean that Buffy has asked him to move in with them on a permanent basis.  He may be staying there temporarily, but . . .”

Xander threw down the comic book he’d been reading and stood up defensively.  “Well, he’s been there since the incubus incident.”

Giles motioned for Xander to retake his seat.  “Dawn is very fond of him.  Perhaps Buffy doesn’t wish to upset her by kicking him out?”

“She’s moved him into her old room.”  Willow stated flatly.

Giles’ eyes widened.  “Excuse me?”

Willow repeated herself.  “Buffy moved all of her things into Joyce’s old room and gave Spike her room.”

“With black out curtains and everything.”  Tara added.

Giles sighed heavily.  “Oh my.”

Xander slumped in his seat.  “Exactly.  We need to get him out of there.  Maybe we wait until he goes to sleep . . .”

Willow cried out in disbelief.  “Xander!  We’re not going to kill him!  Not after everything he’s done to help us.  We just need to help Buffy see that keeping a vampire as a roommate is not the best idea.”

Anya interjected with her thoughts.  “Are you sure that’s all he is?  I mean maybe he’s more than just a roommate.  Maybe he’s . . .”

Xander shook his head and covered his ears.  “Don’t say it!  I’m having Buffy sex-bot flashbacks!”

Willow tried to make sense of the situation, trying her best to see it from Buffy and Dawn’s point of view.  “Well, he has kind of given himself a make over.  I mean he’s still, Spike - all ‘Grrr’  and sarcastic, but he’s all ‘Grrr’  to the bad guys now.”

Tara added to her girlfriend’s train of thought.  “You should’ve seen him the night she got hurt.  He went completely berserk on that lizard demon.”

Willow continued.  “And maybe Buffy appreciates all he’s done and is just letting him stay there instead of paying him like she used to.”

Anya got up and started to straighten out the incense display.  “Or maybe she’s playing house.”

Giles and Xander gasped in unison.  “What?”

Anya continued her work.  “You know, Buffy’s the Mommy, Dawn’s the Baby and Spike’s the Daddy.”

Xander reacted with revulsion at the thought.  “Daddy?  Spike’s nobody’s Daddy!”

Giles tried his best to keep his composure and think about Anya’s statement objectively.  “Well, that would make a strange sort of sense.  After all they’ve been through, that they all might be trying to create a sense of normality by forming a warped version of a nuclear family.”

Tara nodded in agreement.  “Buffy and Dawn lost their mother and then each other.  Since she came back it’s been hard to adjust to everything again.  Buffy and Dawn need the help getting back to normal and maybe Spike is filling that void by playing guard dog or Daddy or whatever.”

Xander continued to be revolted.  “Ugh!  I’m not hearing this!  Spike is not the one that should be filling any voids.  Ick!”

Giles silenced Xander with a wave of his hand.  “All right!  Buffy is ill, but she is recovering quickly.  I do not think that barging into her home and evicting Spike is the best idea at the moment.”

Willow spoke up again.  “I agree.  We just need to pick up patrols and stay away from spells that go horribly, horribly wrong and hurt Buffy.”

Tara put her hand on Willow’s.  “Honey, it’s OK.  We all make mistakes.”

Anya rolled her eyes at the witches.  “Some more than others.”

Xander turned to Giles.  “OK, so that’s a no on the intervention then?  We’re just going to sit back and let William the Bloody waltz in and become man of the house?”

Giles took a breath and nodded.  “Right.  No intervention just careful observation.  We’ll drop in for unannounced visits and check in on them.  And help as much as we can.  We’ll keep a close eye on them.  If anything gets out of control, we will act on it.”

“Like the Department of Social Services?”  Tara asked.

“I suppose so, yes.  We just need to make sure that Buffy is safe.  But we have no right to tell her how to live her life.  It is after all, her life.”

By the way, I want to mention how much I appreciate everyone’s reviews on this series.  It really means a lot to mean that you are enjoying it.

And a super big thanks to my best friend, Delirium whose story comments and bi-coastal phone calls really help me keep it flowing.  (Can’t wait to see you in July, Girlie Girl!)

It was 8:30 in the morning when Dawn woke Buffy up by rummaging through her closet in search of a pair of sandals to wear to the beach.  Buffy sat up in her bed and questioned her little sister’s “borrowing” habit.

“Why can’t you just wear your own?”

“I hate mine, they’re lame.”  Dawn replied as she pulled out the pair of pretty black sandals with the clear blue beads on the ankle strap.”

“They weren’t lame when I bought them for you last month.”

“Oh come on, Buffy, please?  These will go perfect with my outfit.”

“Oh all right!  I don’t need them right now anyway.”  Buffy pouted and fluffed her pillow viciously.

Dawn observed her sister’s behavior.  Buffy was beginning to really get antsy about not being able to go out and enjoy herself.  Even the little things were bugging her more than usual.  “Um, Buffy?  Do you want me to stick around while you take a shower?”

“Nah, I really haven’t needed any help with that since the gauze came off.  I’ll be fine.”

“Are you sure?”

“I’m sure.”

Dawn finished putting on the sandals then stood in front of the full-length mirror.  Frowning at what she saw she whined to her sister.

“When am I actually going to get some curves on this body?”

“Hey, just be happy you’re not short like me.  You got lucky and got the tall gene.”

“I know, but I’m all legs and no breasts!”

Buffy laughed at the teenager’s eternal lament.  They never like their bodies.  The fat ones want to be skinny, the skinny ones want to gain weight, the flat chested want boobs and the over endowed girls want a breast reduction.

“Stop it!  You have boobs, and besides there’s always the Wonder bra.”

Dawn checked her chest out from the side view and sighed in disappointment.  “Do you think I’m too young for implants?”

“Oh my God!  Dawnie, you’re beautiful.  You don’t need to change anything.”

Dawn rolled her eyes and clicked her tongue.  “So says my blind sister.”

“You are.  And if Kevin or any guy can’t see it then, they’re just stupid!  Now stop obsessing and go to the beach with your friends.”

“Yes, ma’am!  Bye!”  Dawn kissed Buffy quickly goodbye.

Buffy called after her.  “And be home on time!”

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Buffy had decided to take a shower around noontime.  Dawn was gone for the day and Spike was still asleep in his room and she had all the hot water to herself.  As she let the steaming hot water stream down her back she couldn’t help but think about the vampire dead asleep two doors down.  She feared that she was getting more and more attached to him, so much so that she was beginning to have trouble imagining life in this house without him.

She worried about what her friends thought about this arrangement she, Dawn and Spike had. She worried about how she felt about this arrangement.  She knew Spike wanted her, in every way possible he wanted her, but he hadn’t pushed the subject since she’d gotten hurt.  She wondered if he maybe didn’t find a wounded slayer a little less attractive or maybe even boring.  But he didn’t really treat her any differently than before she got hurt.  He was still Spike, only a more considerate Spike, a more domesticated Spike, a sexier Spike.

The water began to run cooler and she decided that she was pruned enough.  As Buffy began to get out of the shower she misjudged her step.  She felt her body begin to fall and attempted to correct herself, but the bathtub was too slippery.  She went down hard, smacking her forehead on the sink on the way down.  Buffy’s world went dark.

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Spike woke up with a start at the noise of a body hitting the floor.  Not bothering to put on his tee shirt, he got up out of his bed and rushed towards Buffy’s room.  Opening the door he found that all was quiet except the sound of a heart beating in the bathroom.

He saw Buffy lying on the floor in a heap.  *  Oh my God!  What was she thinking?  *  Spike was afraid to move her, but he needed to examine her.  She had a big bruise on her forehead, she was unconscious, dripping wet and nude.  But she was breathing and her heart was beating steady and strong.  Spike picked her up from the floor and carried her over to the bed.

Wrapping her in a big fluffy towel he attempted to wake her.  “Slayer!  Buffy!  Come on luv!  Wake up!  Don’t make me call 911 or worse, don’t make me call Xander!”

Buffy’s eyes fluttered open at the sound of his voice.  “Huh?  Spike?”  She whispered.

“Good morning, Sunshine.  Welcome back.”

Buffy blinked in an effort to focus a little bit, but to no avail.  Then she remembered.  *  Oh yeah.  I can’t see anyway.  *  Buffy rubbed the bruise on her head.  “I fell.”

“I see.  Do you want me to get you some ice for that bruise you managed to get yourself?”

“I’ll get it.”  Buffy tried to get up.

“No!  Just stay there, I’ll get it.”

Spike dashed downstairs to the freezer and grabbed the ice pack that Buffy kept around for those particularly rough nights on patrol.  When he returned to her bedroom Buffy was attempting to get up again.  “No!  What did I just say, Slayer?  Just relax for a minute, will you?” 

“Well, I can’t just lie naked and wet in a towel all day!” 

Spike smiled.  “Why not?”

Buffy punched him in the arm.

“Ow!  How can you even see me to hit me?”

“You’re a black and white blob.”

Spike gently placed the ice pack on her forehead.  “You can only see in black and white?”

“No.  Your skin is white and so is your hair.”  Buffy reached up and ran her fingers through his soft white blond locks.  “And your jeans are black.”  Then she let her hand rest on his thigh.

“But you can tell that I’m nearby without even looking, right?”

She nodded at him.

“How do you know?”  Spike asked.

“Come on Spike, can’t you tell when I’m close by?”

His voice caught in his throat for a moment at the thought.  Of course he could feel her when she was nearby.  “Y-Yes.”  He stammered.

“Well, how do you do it?”

“I can feel it.  Can’t really explain.  It’s a combination of everything.  Your heartbeat, your scent, it makes me all Grr!”

Buffy’s face crinkled up.  “Grr?  So it’s a bad feeling?”

“No!  God no!  It makes me very agitated is all.  Like, I have to be on my toes.  It’s the anticipation of something exciting.”

“You feel like that all the time?”

“When I’m around you, yeah.  But you already know that.”

“No, not really.  You think I’m exciting?”

Spike snorted at the beautiful barely covered woman on the bed before him.  “Oh, please!  You really have to ask me that?”

“Well, I’ve been less than exciting lately.  I’m more or less a boring slayer who can’t even take a shower by herself.”

“Yes, but you are all naked under that towel.  And that’s very exciting.”

“Hey!  I don’t remember putting this on.  When you found me was I naked?”

“Yes, you were.”

“And you saw…”

Smiling wickedly Spike cut her off.  “Everything.”

Buffy rolled her eyes.  “You’re smiling right now aren’t you?”

“Oh yes, but gimme a little credit, Buffy.  You were bloody unconscious and . . . Wait a second, didn’t you say that would be the only time I would ever have a chance with you?”

Buffy sighed.  “Shut up, Spike.”

Spike decided not to push her.  “Are you hungry, pet?  Maybe you should eat or take a nap or . . .”

Buffy sat up before Spike could stop her.  She put her hand on his mouth and silenced him.

“I get very agitated when you’re around too.  But I can’t hear your heartbeat or smell your scent.  But I can feel your presence.  But it’s not like when I’m hunting other vampires or demons.  It used to be, but it’s different now, it’s been different for a while.  I feel it here.”  Buffy placed Spike’s hand on her lower abdomen and held it there a moment.  Quietly she said, “It aches.”

Spike let his hand stay put.  “It hurts you?  Well no wonder you’ve always hated me.  I’m a walking talking cramp!”

Buffy smiled up at him.  “No, Spike.  It doesn’t ache like that.  It feels . . .  it feels like you’re the only one who can make it go away.”

Spike slowly let his fingers slip inside of the towel and he gently stroked her belly where she had placed his hand.  He put his free hand into her hair.  While running his fingers through her blond locks he brushed his cool lips upon hers.

She sucked in a sharp breath as his hand left her hair and his thumb gently coaxed her mouth open.  As soon as her lips parted he replaced his thumb with his tongue.  His tongue explored her mouth and his other hand dropped from her stomach and rested between her legs.  He lazily stroked the soft moist hair there while Buffy moaned into his mouth.  She parted her legs wider to give him more access to her body.  He pulled the towel away and revealed her entire body to his blue eyes.

As the chill hit her body, warning bells sounded in Buffy’s brain.  *  What if Dawn comes home early?  What if Willow and Tara come over for lunch?  What would my friends think?  What would Mom have said?  I should stop this.  *  “Um, maybe we shouldn’t do this.”

Spike continued kissing Buffy’s mouth.  “Why?  We’re alone.  Dawn won’t be home for hours.  Your friends are all at work or school.  No one needs to know.  It’s not their business.  This is ours.  We can keep it just between us.”

He lowered his mouth to her neck and lightly licked and sucked at her tender flesh, begging her to say yes to him.  “Please Buffy.  Let me take that ache of yours away.”

Buffy pulled away from his advance and tried her best to see his expression.  She needed this, she needed him, but she didn’t need everyone to find out that she had let him do this to her.  “Just between you and me?”

“Just us, luv.  Just us.”

Buffy laid herself back down on the bed silently giving him her permission to continue.

Spike smiled.  “Close your eyes.”

“Why? What’s the point?  I can barely see you anyway.”

“I want you to let your eyes rest.  Just relax and enjoy me for a change.”

This was crazy, but for some reason not being able to see herself in the mirror for the last week had made her lose some of her inhibitions, at least where Spike was concerned.  Oh, who was she kidding?  Just a little over a week ago she was going to let a shape shifting sex demon who looked and acted just like Spike do exactly this to her.  Except this time it was real.  That really was his mouth suckling on her breast.  Those really were his hands massaging her as she sighed beneath him.  She felt his bare chest cool against her stomach as her temperature began to rise with every kiss he placed on her warm moist flesh.

With her eyes closed she tried to picture what he looked like.  Did he look animalistic?  Ravenous?  Enraptured?  Was he smiling as his mouth traveled lower on her body?  Did he look as beautiful as she thought he would between her thighs?  Spike’s fingers parted her folds and she felt his now warm tongue begin to tease her clit.  She gasped and wondered if he liked the way she tasted.  What did she taste like?

Heaven!  She tasted like heaven.  And this was as close as he was ever going to get to that place.  With every move he made on her body she responded exquisitely – moaning, stiffening her body, arching against him.  Wordlessly she begged him to continue.  She was so warm and wet and sweet in his mouth he could get a stake right through his heart at this very moment and die a happy man or demon or whatever.  An eternity in Hell was worth these few beautiful moments with her. 

He couldn’t help but wonder how she would treat him after this interlude was over.  Would she pretend nothing happened?  Would she kick him out?  Or would she want more?

She was already so wet from his ministrations that he easily slid two fingers inside of her, stretching her opening wider.  He inner muscles contracted and squeezed his fingers.  As she keened and whimpered with pleasure he began to stroke her slowly placing his tongue onto her clit and licking in time with his strokes.

Buffy bunched the bed sheets in her fists and braced herself against him.  This was perfect.  She would be falling over the edge of her climax very soon and he would be there to catch her fall.  She was his.  Even if it was just for this moment, he finally had his beautiful slayer.  His love.

Buffy gasped as Spike’s mouth began to suck on her clit.  All the while he never stopped moving his fingers in and out of her.  This was unreal.  How could she be so close so soon?  Well, it had been a while since she’d last felt a man’s touch and she’d never had one make her actually have an orgasm while doing this.

Maybe it was because this was so bad.  She was definitely walking on the dark side with him.  She remembered the argument she’d had with Spike the night he confessed his love for her.  “Spike!  You’re a vampire!”  “Angel was a vampire.”  “Angel was good!”  “I can be good too.”  And Spike was good.  Good at torturing her mercilessly with his fingers and his mouth.  Good at making her body quiver.  She felt like she was burning up as she bucked against his hand.  Buffy broke into a million pieces as she came panting and squealing with pleasure on the bed that used to be her mother’s.  Breathlessly she begged the vampire kneeling between her legs.  “Spike?  Um, please . . . um . . .”

She was begging him.  Oh this was too much.  He couldn’t help it; he had to play with her just a little.

“What’s that, pet?”

He undid the zipper on his jeans as loudly and slowly as he could then he stood and removed the remainder of his clothing.  Buffy sat up and opened her eyes.  She could only make out a blurry white figure in front of her.  “Spike?”

“Yes, luv?”

She held out her arms to him.  “Please come here.”

He moved closer and she grasped him around the neck and pulled him down to her.  She touched his face with her tiny hands in an attempt to clearly see his expression.  When her fingers rested on his lips he smiled and kissed her fingertips.  She could feel his erection nudging into her belly.  She let her hand drop between his legs.  She felt for his cock, taking it into her hand while he moaned at her touch.  As Buffy “saw it” for the first time, she thought, *  Oh my God!  He’s really big.  * 

She let out a soft laugh and Spike cringed in fear that he wasn’t “measuring up”.  “Oh God!  What’s so funny, Buffy?”  Spike asked not really wanting to hear the answer.

“I was just thinking is this the real reason they call you ‘Spike?’”

Spike shook his head and laughed in relief.  “Oh were that the truth, luv!”

He gathered her into his arms cradling her nakedness against his own.  Buffy giggled as he lay with her shaking with uncontrollable laughter.

Buffy began to think that this wasn’t scary or frightening.  It didn’t feel bad or evil.  She felt comfortable and surprisingly normal all of a sudden.  Like they’d been doing this for years.  Like they had never been sworn enemies.  This was completely natural and unnatural at the same time.  She flipped Spike over onto his back and strattled him.

Smiling down at him with a wicked smirk Buffy put her head between his legs her blond hair making a puddle of gold on his stomach.  “Maybe I should take a closer look.”

She lowered her mouth to his hard cock and kissed the tip.  She sucked at it gently and stroked him gently with her hand.  Spike knew where this was heading and if he didn’t stop her right now this experience was going to be over before it even started.

  Putting his hands in her hair he tenderly lifted her head up and whispered to her.  “Come on, luv.  Come with me.”  He led her off the bed towards the little love seat in the corner of the bedroom.  Spike sat himself down on the little couch.  He wanted her to face him while they made love the first time, even if she couldn’t see him clearly.

He pulled her to him.  “Come sit on my lap.”

Buffy positioned herself over his cock and slowly slid herself down his length.  Both vampire and slayer gasped as her heat enveloped his cool hard shaft.

As she began to raise herself up again and he stopped her.  “Wait!”  He cupped her face and kissed her softly.

He didn’t say why he had stopped her, but she knew.  He wanted to tell her he loved her that he always had.  He wanted to let her know that this was more than just sex, that this meant more to him than anything since he had been a human being.  His whole life had led him to her.  She was a piece of heaven for a lowly demon like him.  But he said nothing.  He didn’t have to say anything, she already knew.

She also knew hearing those words again from him would scare her.  The words would have frightened her but his kisses didn’t, his hard cock inside of her didn’t nor did his hands on her breasts or the way he was rocking her against him right now.  She loved this.  In the depths of her heart she could feel it, she didn’t just love doing this with him.  She loved him.  Somewhere inside she was finally admitting to herself how she felt about this creature.  All those years of making each other’s lives a living Hell had led them to this moment of pleasure instead of pain.

Buffy’s brain had finally made the connection with her heart.  She did love him, but at the same time she knew she could never tell him.  If she told him it would make him disappear like it had with every other man in her short life.

She grinded herself against him and he thrust himself up inside of her, hard and fast.  She braced herself on his shoulders digging her nails into him.  He was panting needlessly; he was too excited not to.  Buffy was unable to see his features, but she supposed he had his eyes closed.  She had left hers open.  She could only see his tell tale white blond hair, but she needed to see it to remind her that it was Spike.  *  Spike, Spike, Spike, Spike.  Spike inside me.  Spike fucking me.  Spike kissing me.  Spike loving me.  Spike drowning in me.

Spike stared directly into her blinded eyes.  He could tell that she was trying so hard to see him.  Her hands reached up into his hair.   *  It must be the only thing she can recognize. *  Spike tilted his head back and he pushed into her harder, grasping her behind and digging his fingers in.  He could feel her walls tighten around him.  She placed a kiss on his forehead and wrapped her arms around his neck.  She was mewling and sighing on him.  He never wanted this to end, but he could feel his climax was coming on very soon.

Again, the fear that she would reject him surfaced.  She could use him for this brief moment then dismiss it as being a “moment of weakness”.  She could chalk it up to loneliness or insanity and banish him from her.  He’d be shut out and he might not ever be able to touch her again.

If he were human she’d keep him and wouldn’t turn away from him.  For just a moment an absurd fantasy ran through his mind.  *  If I were human, she could be my wife, I could walk with her in the sun, I could give her a child, and we could create life instead of death.  *

With a final thrust into her searing heat he reached his breaking point.  Buffy’s voice was in his ear as she held onto him.  She was panting his name over and over.  “Spike, Spike, Spike.”

She tightened around him again and cried out as she came.  He held onto her tightly and poured his cold seed into her.  “Buffy!”  He hissed in pleasure.

As they both relaxed in one another’s embrace, Spike could feel her heartbeat against his chest begin to slow.  He imagined for a moment that he was the man in his fantasy.  Human, husband, father, everything he had wanted to be when he was William over a century before.  He ignored the tears falling from his eyes, as he cried for his former self.

Buffy listened to his needless panting as his hands gripped her body desperately.  She wished she could see him clearly.  She reached up and touched his face.  It was wet.  *  Why was his face wet?  Vamps don’t sweat.  *  She stroked his face, concerned.  She felt his eyes blink and a single tear spilled into her hand.  *  He was crying!  Vampires don’t cry.  William the Bloody never cried.  *  But he was crying.  She heard him sniff and she kissed his cheeks, tasting the salt of his tears.  She kissed his mouth passionately and began to rock him back and forth in her arms.  Just then he seemed so vulnerable, so human.  He wasn’t the monster she’d known for so many years.  He was just a man.

Buffy got up from Spike’s lap and led him back to the bed.  They both crawled in underneath the covers and he pulled her close to him, spooning her.  As Spike hugged her tightly, Buffy remembered the sleepy conversation he’d had with Dawn.  “Tell her you’re not a vampire anymore.”  “But I am . . .I am.”  “Not on the inside, just tell her.”

“Buffy?”

“Mmm?”

“Do you want me to go?  I should really let you rest.”

“No, Spike.  I want you to stay.  I need you to stay.”

It was only a few minutes before both of them were sleeping contentedly in one another’s arms, at peace for the first time.