Buffy's eyes absently moved across the same page for the thirtieth time, as she pretended to read.

Her mind was on other things though.

It had been three weeks.

Three weeks since everything she'd though she knew for certain had been pronounced bullshit and had fucked up her life.

Four weeks ago, she'd believed that vampires were just an after effect of a demon gone wrong.

Four weeks ago she believed she was human.

Two weeks ago she'd found out different.

Three weeks ago her world had been turned upside down when her unwilling-vampire-partner had randomly turned into her unwilling-human-partner.

No one was quite sure how.......but everyone was placing the big bucks on prophecy.

A week later, he was attacked.

Two weeks ago she'd found out she was more supernatural then she'd previously thought.

She was a "vampire/demon/human hybrid".

An aberration.

A mistake.

A savior.

Two weeks ago she'd found out she could turn humans.

Two weeks ago, she'd become Spike's second sire, and Spike had changed from her unwilling-human-partner to her unwilling-male-version-of-slayer-although-seemingly-sans-soul-partner.

Everything was-

"Switch off the fucking light pet, and go to sleep."  Spike's annoyed voice rang out through the plush hotel room.  He reached over to switch it off himself, but his hand was knocked away. 

It was bad enough he had to be in the same bed as the slayer and not be able to touch her but not being allowed to sleep was just plain mean.

"No, Spike.  I want to read."

They were finally on 'holiday' - two weeks in Acapulco. 

In the middle of summer.

Everything paid for by the Watcher's Council.  Everything organized for them.  Including one room, with one bed.

Not that they hadn't slept in the same room before.  Back home they shared Buffy's room.  But there was two beds.

Buffy hated to admit it but the only reason she wanted to read was so that she could take her mind off the sexy specimen lying next to her. 

She still wasn't sure if it was a Godsend or a curse....

He didn't remember anything about his 'human-time'.

But she did...

She remembered the way silly little things that William had done to endear her to him even more.

And little chivalrous things that she noticed that even 'her' vampire Spike had done.

The more she'd gotten to know him, William, the more her 'you can't love him, he has no soul' defenses had been broken down.....now the fortress she'd built around her heart was just rubble.

William was in Spike.  There was no doubt about it.

And though she knew she shouldn't love him...She did.  He was like a custom made mate for her. 

Perfect. 

Ideal. 

But there was one problem.

He was no different towards her then vampire-Spike.

Time and time again she would replay what William had said just before she'd changed him.

<<

"I love you and he did too."

"He?"

"Spike."

>>

Was there any truth in it?

Why would he lie to her?

Maybe she should just ask.

"Spike?"

"What?"

He rolled onto his side as she did.  Both facing each other.  So close.

"Nothing." *Fuck.  You're such a wuss, Summers.*

She started to turn but he caught her waist, turning her back around.

"No, what did want to ask me?"

His hand was still on her waist and all her nerves seemed to end at that point.

"Nothing." She responded, meeting his eyes briefly before rolling again, slayer strength knocking his arm off her with the movement and switching off the light.

***

Buffy woke up in a very comfortable position.  She moaned quietly and opened her eyes, getting quite a shock when she did.

She was on Spike's side of the bed, wrapped in his arms.  The leg that wasn't thrown over his waist was tangled up with his and a sheet that they were both under. 

Her arms were hanging over his shoulders and neck while his hands were under her top, dangerously half over her bra-less breasts.

"Oh shit."  Buffy murmured, desperately trying to think of a way of getting out of this position...WITHOUT waking the blonde vampire.

She tried moving the leg that was under the covers but as she did the vampire rolled slightly so that she was straddling his waist. 

She tried to sit up since she was currently nose-to-nose with him but his arms wrapped tighter around her and he whispered in his sleep, "Stay still, pet."

Without opening his eyes he kissed her gently on the mouth thinking he was still dreaming (especially considering their position) and rolled them on to their sides.

Buffy closed her eyes, her lips thrumming from the soft kiss.  She was starting to wonder if she was still asleep - this was too surreal. 

*Why is he reacting to me like this?* 

Suddenly realization hit her like a sledgehammer and she bit back the desire to cry.  He thought she was Dru.  Or worse - Harmony.  And it killed her inside. 

In spite of her resolution, a single tear slipped down her cheek. 

It dropped on to Spike's face, dampening his own cheek.

As he felt wetness on his cheek he opened his eyes, frowning at his dream-girl.  He thought he was still asleep.  He loved having dreams about her but why was she crying? 

One of his hands came up to touch her face, his thumb rubbing the tear's trail into her skin.

"What's wrong, love?"

He gently kissed her before pulling back to stare into her shocked eyes.

"Kitten?"

His hand moved to brush back some of her hair that had fallen onto her face.

Buffy swallowed, *He can't be in his right mind...* She thought as his lips came down on hers. *Oh God!*

His tongue slipped into her mouth and her arms tightened around his shoulders unconsciously.  As she felt his erection poking into her bottom one rational thought entered her mind. 

*This isn't fair - he doesn't know who you are. What's happening...anything, so stop it!*

"Spike..." He began kissing down her neck.  "Stop..."

"Why?" He growled near her ear.

"I think maybe..." She shivered as his hand moved to her breasts, sliding under her top. "You don't want to do this.  You might want to stop."

She felt him chuckle against her skin, "Why would I want to do that, love?"

"I'm...mmm...thinking you were hit on the head, 'cause you wouldn't be doing this if...ooh...you knew who..."

"Slayer, what are you babbling about?"  Spike smiled though he continued to kiss and nip and lick her soft skin.  Pulling her top down out of the way his mouth covered her nipple.

"You know?  Why are you...ooh, god Spike."

He smiled again as he heard her moan and he raised his head to meet her eyes.  "I love you, Buffy."

Buffy's eyes bugged, "You what?"  She squeaked.

"I love you." He rolled her on to her back as he began to kiss back down her throat. "So much."

"Spike...damn-it, get off!"  Buffy was pissed; this wasn't fair.  He can't say something like that and then not be in his right mind when he says it.

Spike moved off her, carefully disentangling their legs and sat at the other end of the bed.  He watched as she pulled down her top and walked into the bathroom. 

He sighed and lay back against the pillows, closing his eyes.  *This is my dream - things should be going better.*  He thought before slipping asleep.

Five seconds later Buffy walked in with a glass of ice cold water and threw it over Spike.

"What the fuck?"  He came up spluttering to glare at Buffy who stood next to the bed.

"Good, now you're awake we can go back to sleep."

She climbed over Spike who was still lying shocked and wet. 

"Slayer?"  He growled when she simply lay down next to him.

"What?"

"What?  Why the fuck did you pour a bloody glass of water over me?"

"Oh."

"Oh?"

"Well...you see...you were talking and stuff in your sleep and it was wiggy."  Buffy said, blushing furiously.

Spike opened and closed his mouth a couple of times.  He was talking in his sleep.  He remembered his dream - what the fuck did he say?

"Like what?"

"You said...you just...stuff, okay?"

Spike took a deep breath.  Did he say what he thought he said.

"Buffy?  What did I say?"

"Spike, just drop it alright."

"Slayer..."

"Spike, please, I'm tired..."  She begged.

When he heard the tears threatening to escape in her voice he stopped, not wanting to see her cry because of him.  "Yeah, sure...sorry." 

***

Spike got out of bed when he heard the slayer's breathing begin to slow, indicating sleep.  Removing his clothes he crossed to the shower, using only cold water.  He'd woken up with a raging hard-on and was now attempting to dull it with the icy spray.

Moving from the shower, less than satisfied he slipped on a clean pair of boxers and crossed to the bed.  He got in, lying on his back.  He crossed his arms behind his head, leaning his head against them and sighed.

He was just thinking how unfair unlife or life or whatever the fuck he had was when the slayer slid across the bed, moving up to him.

Buffy was dreaming. 

One of her happier dreams. 

One of 'those' dreams.

The ones she couldn't even tell Willow about.....despite their frequency.

Spike had just gotten into bed, it was the morning and daylight was bathing the two of them in its warm glow.  She sighed and moved up to him, laying her head on his chest.

Spike tensed as she slid her hand across his stomach, her fingers resting just under the hem of his boxer shorts on his left hipbone. One of her legs slipped in-between his legs and she lay half over him.

"Bloody Hell, baby..."  Spike murmured, his right arm wrapping itself around the slayers small form, holding her to him.

Buffy peppered kisses across his shoulder and up his neck, pushing her body up with the movement.  She opened her heavy-lidded eyes and gazed down at the man she loved.

"You took too long."  She whispered, before pressing her lips to his.

Shocked, Spike's hand moved from behind his head to tangle in her hair as she slowly deepened the kiss.  *What the fuck is happening?  What is she doing?*

Buffy felt her dream-guy harden underneath her as she climbed on top of him and she rubbed her hips down into his.  She smiled inwardly as she heard him groan, deep inside his chest.

*Oh shit!*  Spike took a moment to figure out what was going on when he realized she was probably half-asleep and not aware of what she was doing.  As she rubbed against him again, Spike was VERY aware of what she was doing.  Reigning in the last bit of control he had, he moved them so that they were sitting up, Buffy still straddling his waist.

He broke off the kiss and watched as she filled her lungs with deep breaths, her eyes closed.  He could see she was falling back asleep and he gently shook her, calling her name.  "Buffy, love, wake up!"

Buffy flinched at the loud voice as she slowly regained consciousness.  Her eyes flickered open to stare into Spike's aroused gaze.  She took a sharp breath when she found herself to be sitting on something quite hard.

"Spike?"  She whispered.

"You were dreaming, pet."  Spike kind of explained, after sighing.

"Oh."  Buffy said, wondering why she hadn't moved yet.

"Yeah."  Spike replied, also wondering why she hadn't moved yet.

Buffy had an idea, "So, you're awake now?"  She asked.

"Yeah."

"Good."  Buffy pressed her lips back to his, pushing him back down to the bed with her body.  *There couldn't have been a better opportunity.*  She convinced herself.

Spike's arms went around her waist, his fingers playing with the hem of her vest top.  *This works better...*  Spike thought just as Buffy broke away from his lips.  He watched under heavy lids as she sat up.  She pulled off her top and Spike's eyes bugged as her breasts spilled free.

"God, I love you."  He breathed as his gaze washed over her.  Buffy smiled tenderly, pulling his lips back to hers. 

"That’s all I wanted to hear."  She murmured against his mouth.

***

Buffy sighed contentedly as she rested her cheek on her lovers chest, gazing out into the dark nights sky.

A warm breeze blew gently through the window, tickling her bare skin.

Her head rose with every breath her vampire-turned-human-turned-male-slayer took.

Buffy smiled as she remembered something from one of her old English Classes.

"This is stuff of dreams..."