"Are you gonna live your life standing in the back looking around?
Are you gonna waste your time?
Gotta make a move or you'll miss out.
Someone's gonna ask you what it's all about.
Stick around nostalgia won't let you down.
Someone's gonna ask you what it's all about.
Whatcha gonna have to say for yourself?
I'm on my feet, I'm on the floor, I'm good to go.
Now all I need is just to hear a song I know.
I wanna always feel like part of this was mine.
I wanna fall in love tonight."

Buffy stood in the middle of the Bronze dancing to the beat of the music, her friends surrounding her, barely paying any thought to the melody playing around her. Suddenly she snapped into attention and she really heard the words for the first time. It was a song she had listened to with Willow a dozen times before, this was the first time she actually heard the words and understood their meaning. All of a sudden she knew what she had to do. She knew where she belonged.

She pulled Willow aside, "Will, I have to be somewhere. Can you take care of Dawn?"

Willow looked concerned, "Buffy we've only been here an hour. Are you all right?"

"Yeah, Will, I'm fine. I just realized there's somewhere I need to be right now."

"Where do you need to go?" Willow asked, the worried expression on her face showing plainly. Buffy hadn't been the same since she came back and her recent changes made Willow more apprehensive about her leaving than ever. She had recently been spending so much time alone making Willow worried about what was actually going on.

"Will, I can't talk about it right now, but I promise that tomorrow you and I will have a long talk about what's been going on lately. I know that I haven't been myself, or at least that I haven't been my old self. I swear I'll explain everything tomorrow" an urgency showing in her voice. Buffy needed to get out of The Bronze while she still had the courage to sort out what needed to be done.

It seemed to Willow that Buffy was constantly promising about tomorrow. She also knew the determined look on Buffy's face meant she was going to leave whether Willow was happy about it or not.

"Alright Buffy, but I'm going to hold you to that promise, even if I have to chain you to the wall and beat it out of you." she said with a smirk and a wink.

Buffy let out a sigh of relief and, after hugging Willow, made her way out the door. Xander made his way over to Willow, followed closely by Tara and Anya.

"Where's the Buff-ster off to? We just got here." he said, slightly annoyed.

"She had somewhere she needed to be, and it appeared to be important so off she went." said Willow, trying to contain some of the worry from her voice. Tara smiled but knew that tone, she knew that Willow was hiding something but also knew enough to wait until they were alone to address it. She took Willow's hand and squeezed to let her know that she kneve to. I will never forget those things, Spike, and I regret being so blind and stupid about accepting your love." The smile that spread to his face was so bright it lit the dank, dark crypt and caused Buffy's heart to swell even larger.

"Does anyone else know about this?"

"I wanted to tell you first, so that you would know as soon as possible how I felt. I'm telling Willow, Tara, and Dawn tomorrow. Xander and Anya will have to come later." She could feel the electricity in the room as he tried to contain his excitement and stay seated. His foot tapping on the floor made her smile so she placed her hand on his knee to calm him. He looked at her hand moving slowly up to her face and for a long, silent moment just gazed at her.

"I never saw blue like that before
Across the sky
Around the world.
You're giving me all you have and more
And no one else has ever shown me how
To see the world the way I see it now
Oh I, I never saw blue like that before.
And it feels like now,
And it feels always,
And it feels like coming home."

An instant moved by with complete comfort and she moved forward and with her lips a breath away from his she said yet again "I love you, Spike." and closed the space trying to put all her love and longing into one short kiss.

She began to back away and he stopped her by placing his hand on her cheek saying "I love you too, Buffy." and beginning to kiss her with all the love he had been containing since he first discovered it. The kiss grew in intensity and they both stood placing their arms around each other. They stood so close their bodies nearly intertwined. Never breaking the kiss, Spike lifted his hands to the buttons on her blouse and slowly smoothed it from her shoulders, down her arms, landing soundlessly on the floor. Buffy broke the kiss and, panting, she stared into his eyes and began unbuttoning Spike's shirt, realizing she wanted to touch him skin to skin. She kissed his jaw and moved down his neck as they both edged back towards the bed. Buffy pushed him gently against the bed, laying him down, and crawled up his body, beginning anew her task of freeing him from his shirt. She slowly released each button placing a kiss on his chest behind every one, and little by little spreading it wide, running her hands across his shoulders and down his arms until he sat up allowing her to take it off.

"I can't believe this is actually happening. Are you sure this isn't a dream? Are you sure this is what you want?" he stammered, short of breath, hungry to touch her but wanting to make sure that he wasn't just fooling himself.

"I've never been more sure of anything in my life, Spike. This is not a dream, and I know it is YOU that I want." She laughed smacking him upside the head playfully to assure him of the reality of the situation. He growled at her in mock anger and pulled her forcefully on top of him abandoning any doubts he still had and brought his lips to hers with a passion and a ferocity she had never before experienced. She roughly pushed him back to the bed and got up and away from him so fast that he couldn't pull her back down. She stood before him saying "I want to make love to you. We both have way too many clothes on right now." Spike literally tore his remaining clothes off and started to move towards Buffy but she put her hand up to stop him and in an almost painfully slow manner began to skim her skirt down her hips until it slid down and lay in a pool at her feet. Her bra and panties followed until she stood naked before him. He stood out of the bed and came up behind her, lifting her hair and kissing the back of her neck while encircling her with his arms from behind. Buffy stood there all the while just feeling her body being worshiped. Spike slid his hands up from her waist to stroke her breasts, bringing her nipples to tiny points. Buffy let out a moan and turned her head to kiss him. Sw Willow was under a strain. Willow looked into her eyes and knew that she could feel the stress on her shoulders.

"Why don't we get back to the dance floor? My boogie shoes are still on." Tara said trying to take some of the pressure off the conversation.

"Yes, they are playing good music and this conversation is old." retorted Anya, who up to this point had just been silently annoyed with the chatter.

"What do you say Will? Grace us with a dance?" Tara put forth holding her hand out to try and bring her girlfriend back to the fun at hand. Willow's face lightened and she took Tara's hand and was led out to the dance floor. She danced like nothing was wrong, but Buffy's abrupt departure was praying on her mind.

"Hey, don't write yourself off yet.
It's only in your head you feel left out or looked down on.
Just try your best, try everything you can.
And don't you worry what they tell themselves when you're away.
It just takes some time, little girl you're in the middle, of the ride.
Everything everything will be just fine,
Everything everything will be all right."

Buffy walked out of The Bronze with a deep sense of purpose and as she came closer to her destination it became all the more apparent how her next decision was going to completely change her life for better or for worse. Her steps slowed as she came to the door and the breath caught in her chest making it difficult to move. As if a psychic connection existed between them, the door in front of her opened abruptly, and a face appeared before her.

"What are you doing here Slayer?" Spike said with a half serious tone. He looked at her as if expecting an absolutely normal explanation to his question. He received anything but.

"Iloveyou." Buffy hurried the words as if she was afraid they wouldn't come out unless they tumbled from her lips at great speed.

"Excuse me? What did you say?" in all honesty not hearing a word she said, he stood confused by Buffy's rapid heartbeat and nervous shifting from one foot to the other.

Buffy took at deep breath, gathered her courage and slowly repeated "I. Love. You."

Spike stood in a stunned silence, never in his unlife thinking he would hear those words from her mouth unless in a dream.

"Well aren't you going to say something?" Buffy blurted out, again shifting her weight back and forth in an attempt to keep from running away now that she had made her declaration.

Spike just tilted his head and stared at her, still trying to determine if she was real or if this was one of his many dreams where Buffy loved him as much as he loved her. He wasn't quite ready to ruin his delusion, if that's what it was. He finally took a deep unneeded breath and managed to get out "When did you figure that out?" in such a small voice that Buffy almost didn't hear him.

Buffy smiled and ran her fingers along his cheek and softly said "I think I've known it all along, I just wouldn't let it be true." She slid her hand down to his chest then pulled it back to gain her composure and finally continued "I was at The Bronze tonight and a song came on and all I could think of was you. The lyrics seemed to be reading my mind and I knew that it was time to allow myself these feelings." She took his hand in hers and placed the lightest of kisses on the inside of his palm.

He looked into her eyes, searching for any deception. All he found there was truth. He grasped her hand, pulled her into his crypt, sat her down on the couch, and sat next to her. "Are you sure?" a hope lighting his eyes in such a way that made Buffy nearly cry and she regretted she hadn't told him sooner.

"Spike I wouldn't play with you when it comes to this. I can't even count the times you've shown your love for me in one way or another: in telling me, the protection of my family and friends, and by remaining here in Sunnydale when you didn't hahe turned around to face him letting her hands move up his chest until they met intertwined behind his neck. They moved back to the bed without breaking the embrace and introduced their bodies to the other. Spike laid Buffy below him and kissed her lips, her cheeks, her eyelids, and nibbled down her jaw to her neck leaving heated flesh wherever he went.

"I want you inside me, Spike. I want you in me now." Buffy said, voice saturated with lust and love.

"All in good time, my love." Spike said with a grin as he moved down from her neck to her breasts. He placed kisses on each nipple, encircled it with his tongue, and sucked it into his mouth sending a bolt through Buffy. She whimpered, her hands on his shoulders moving to graze through his platinum hair to keep him pressed to her. Spike made a trail of kisses down her chest and stomach and stopped at the dark curls surrounding her womanhood. He looked up at Buffy who was slick with sweat and breathless. He looked straight into her eyes as he delved into her, running his tongue along her clit, making her spasm from head to toe. He licked every inch of her womanhood as she pressed his head down keeping him there lest he dared change his mind. Spike was happy to oblige, loving the scent of her, trying to bring Buffy the pleasure she so desired. He licked again at her clit inciting jumbled cries from Buffy who was thrashing about the bed. He thrust two fingers inside her while still keeping up his ministrations on her clit. Buffy arched off the bed and grabbed a pillow and held it to her face as she cried out.

"Oh my God, Spike." she cried as her orgasm began to surface. "Please, please, I need you inside me NOW!" she screamed as her orgasm roared through her like a runaway train. Spike kissed his way back up to her mouth and as he brought his lips to hers he began to enter her ever so slowly. Buffy's frustrated whimpers finally made him fill her to the brim in one sharp thrust. She moaned in his mouth and then quickly rolled them over so she straddled over top of him, filled with his penis, stretching the walls of her pussy. She kissed him with growing intensity as she rode him at a fevered pace. Spike held his hands on her hips driving her on his cock all the while exploring her mouth. He reached between them to rub his fingers over her clit causing her to break their kiss to cry out in the throes of her second orgasm. He followed right behind her emptying his seed in her tight channel. She gave a final yell and collapsed on top of him, his penis still filling her.

"I love you." Spike sighed as he traced patterns on her back with the tips of his fingers. Buffy just laid her head on his chest and smiled as she drifted off to sleep.

" 'Cause when there's you, I feel whole
And there's no better feeling in the world
But without you I'm alone
And I'd rather be in love with you."

The next morning Buffy woke up to find Spike looking into her eyes. She was overjoyed to find him laying there with her, his hands easing up and down her arms with complete gentleness. Buffy's blue-green eyes gazed into Spike's in surprise; she laid her cheek on her arm and looked back into his eyes.

"Good Morning, luv." he said with a smile.

"Did you sleep at all?" she asked still half asleep herself.

"Nope, didn't want to wake up to find this all a dream." he said while beaming at her. She reached forward and guided his lips to hers.

"Everyone should wake up this way... I do love you, ya know? That part wasn't a dream. Last night was even better than the dreams I had about this."

"You had dreams about me?" he smirked with the confidence returning to his voice. He drew his fingers across her abdomen causing Buffy to suck in her breath in passionate surprise. Spike guided his fingers around her waist and pulled her to him in an adoring embrace. Buffy allowed herself to be pulled into him and kissed him back with equal force. Their lips were on fire and they broke apart breathless. "Is it going always going to be this way? Am I never going to get enough of you?"

"That's my current plan." Buffy answered with a grin on her face, placing a short kiss on his nose. Buffy moved away from him and began to dress.

"Are you going somewhere?" the nervousness rising in his voice. Buffy, half dressed, moved back onto the bed and smoothed his tousled hair away from his face and put her palm to his jaw while running her thumb across his cheek.

"I'm not leaving you Spike, I'm not going to pretend like this didn't happen. I can see the hurt in your face. I just need to go back home and talk to Dawn, Willow, and Tara about this. I want them to hear it from me. I don't want there to be anymore secrets between all of us." This answer seemed to calm Spike's fears, finally knowing that she did love him and that their love was going to be one that could be shown to the light of day, so to speak.

"I love you so much Buffy." He brought her down for a kiss and stood, wrapped in a sheet to walk her to the door. "Good luck with the Niblet. I think she'll be the coolest with it."

"I think you're right. She's always liked you, especially after this summer. I really do have to go. I love you and I'll see you tonight. Try to get some sleep." Buffy smiled and kissed him one last time, pausing to allow him to back up before opening the door to his crypt and stepping into the sun light. She walked home determined to make her friends and family understand her feelings. She knew that it would harder for some of them to understand than others, but she knew that she couldn't keep this from them. It would make her love for Spike seem like it was something that had to be hidden and Buffy didn't want it to look that way. She finally was able to admit her feelings for him had been with her for some time. She came up to her door, put her key in the lock, turned the handle, and walked inside. She knew that no one would be up yet, so she quietly went into the kitchen to fix herself something to eat. She sat at the counter and smiled, realizing that the world was going to change. That being with Spike was going to make everything so different. She knew that he would make her cry sometimes but that he would also make her laugh, that he would understand her like no one else in the world. She knew that with Spike, the world would be new.

"All I have to do
Is close my eyes and think of you
And the world is new."