Buffy wandered around town until dark, lost in her thoughts. Then she quickly, but thoroughly patrolled all the cemeteries and alleys in town. After realizing that once again, there were no demons to slay, she went to the Magic Box, her worries still crowding her mind.

She had left them to do whatever it is they had to do, and did she really want to know? She knew that blood, sex, and violence, comprised the vast majority of vampiric lives. She knew that Spike had asked for Anya to stay to spare Xander something he may or may not want to happen. But what was it exactly he was trying to spare him from? ‘Do I really want to know?’ She was filled with conflicting emotions; if Anya were there, she’d ask her. But Anya was there, and would Spike really be faithful? Not that there was anything for him to be faithful to, but they’d talked about it and were dating now. But were they really? They’d yet to go on a date, or to have any time alone, since they’d no she’dreached the decision.

‘Now that really wasn’t true, we have had time alone, but we spent it patrolling and rescuing Xander.’

When she opened the door to the Magic Box, she noticed Giles was in Anya’s usual place behind the register. Fortunately, he wasn’t lovingly fingering the cash. Tara and Dawn were huddled on the sofa together, and Willow was searching through the book stacks. Noticeably absent were the new Slayer and her Watcher, as well as Morgaine.

“Where’s the England group?” She directed her question at Giles, who had come around to the other side of the counter.

“Oh, well Buffy, they’re taking a bit of a holiday at the moment. They’ve gone to LA for the rest of the week. Left this morning. Except, of course, Morgaine. I’ve no idea where she is.” Buffy thought she caught a hint of worry in her Watcher’s voice, but didn’t say anything.

“OK. Giles, do we have any books or scrolls or something that would give us a clue as to what Xander’s going to go through when he wakes up?” She still had a million questions, but none of them she particularly wanted to ask Giles.

“Willow’s gathering them together as we speak. I thought it might help us, give us an idea…Actually, no one has ever studied this type of thing in person. The Council has collected a lot of lore, rumors, innuendo, and a few interviews at stake point, but I was rather hoping Spike would explain.”

“I asked him to and he wouldn’t. He told me to go look it up, so here I am.”

“Ah, well, I suppose he…” Off came the glasses, and Giles trailed off as he cleaned them studiously.

“He was trying to spare me, and Xander. That’s why he had Anya stay.” Buffy struggled to suppress the twinge she felt inside when she remembered how she left the three of them that afternoon.

“I assumed as much.” Giles apparently wasn’t in much of a rush to discuss the particulars of the situation, either.

“Buffy, do you want to call Angel and have him explain?” Dawn innocently asked.

“NO!” Buffy practically screamed and then cringed at the sound of her own voice; she hadn’t meant to be so sharp. “It’s just, I really don’t want to bring him into all of this. He’s got his own prophecy to deal with, and well, Xander really hates him. More than Spike.”

“I get that.” Dawn replied, “Hey, you’re not going to make me leave and not find out what’s going on, are you?” Buffy thought about that for a long minute. A few minutes, actually, before she replied.

“Dawnie, what’s going on over there isn’t going to be what’s in those books. Xander’s got his soul, and Spike didn’t even really know what was going to happen.” Dawn turned on the puppy dog eyes at this point. “I-- I think it’s different for every vampire. Kind of personal and, yes you can stay, but if anything gets too squicky, I’m covering your ears.” Buffy really, really hoped it didn’t get that squicky.

Dawn squealed and ran over to hug Buffy, “I promise I’ll be good, and if it is squicky, I swear I won’t pick on Xander or Spike.”

“So Wills, what have you found?” Buffy plopped herself down at the table and looked over at the redhead, who had her nose buried in a reference text.

**

At that exact moment the demonic transformation occurred in Xander. The familiar crunching sounds of bone shifting woke Spike. He opened his eyes and stared into a pair of amber eyes glaring right at him. Spike growled; Xander answered with a growl, and Anya woke up.

“Kitten, be a dear, and make sure that blood in the tub is 98.6, and then bring about six bags.” Spike met Xander’s amber eyes with his own, never once taking his gaze off of his childe as he sent Anya off to the bathroom.

**

“Well, I’ve pulled the Vampire Chronicles, Customs and Traditions of Human-Hybrid Demons, Vampyre, Clans: Vampiric Families. I’ve also marked the chapters we need to read.” Willow came over to the table to join Buffy, plopping the books in question in front of her with a loud “thud.” Buffy winced at the stack of books.

“Yes, yes, very good Willow. I believe the most salient information will be in Clans: Vampiric Families.” Giles indicated a maroon volume in the middle of the stack.

“Let me see that.” Buffy said and Willow passed her the book she had been perusing. She quickly turned to the marked chapters. “Whew, that’s a lot of reading.”

“Oh, I know, let’s take turns reading out loud.” Willow suggested enthusiastically. “Buffy since you’ve got the book you can start.”

**

The demon inhabiting Xander began to pounce as Anya came back into the bedroom. Only a ferocious roar from his sire, kept him in crouching position.

**

The turning of a human into a vampire can take anywhere from six to seventy-two hours, depending upon the strength of the sire and the amount of blood transfused. Minions, vampires of lowest standing, are created with the least amount of blood. These creatures are not to be confused with Masters or fledglings. Masters are cunning creatures capable of intelligent thought, reasoning, and logic. Minions are usually no more than zombie-like creatures. Minions are created to be slaves. They hunt for their Masters, follow orders given, and can be used by any and all members of a clan for sexual purposes. They are considered expendable and are not valued in any way.

The difference between minions and fledglings is striking. Fledglings are superior in every way. Their strength, control, and ability to blend in with humans are remarkable. Most are turned after a significant amount of contact between the human and the vampire. Fledglings, or childer, are turned using copious amounts of blood and are usually created for a reason. While not exactly ‘mates,’ fledglings are expected to remain with their sire indefinitely. Sires do not share their fledglings with other vampires, unless forced to by their own sire, or Master of their line. If they exist long enough, many fledglings become Master vampires in their own right.

It appears as though all vampires become stronger with age. If a minion were to live long enough, it is probable they would eventually learn to control their demon and be able to pass for human. Fledglings are often capable of that within days, or sometimes hours, of the transformation.

The Council has captured many minions but has never been able to interview one successfully. Fortunately, a fledgling came into our custody. The vampire called himself Marc. He claims to have been sired by Darla, Order of Aurelius, in 1743. She kept him in her control and under watchful eye for about a decade. Marc believed himself to have been cast aside for her newest childe, Liam.

“Oh my god! He’s like Angel’s brother or something!” Dawn exclaimed. Buffy ignored her comment and handed Willow the book.

The Council captured him in 1918 and managed to persuade him to tell us about the beginnings of his existence as a vampire:

Before I even opened my eyes I was aware of a terrible hunger. But I did not know what for. I opened my eyes and it was as though before that very moment I had been blind. I can’t begin to describe the differences in what a vampire can see compared to a human. Everything is sharper, more in focus. The colors were all brighter and so much more beautiful than I had ever noticed.

And the things I could hear! I could hear the rats scurrying around in the under ground cavern I was in. I could hear their heartbeats. But there was a louder heartbeat much nearer to me than any of the rats. I could hear the blood rushing through the human before me and suddenly I knew what I was hungry for and what I was. Blood. Vampire. I leapt on the pitiful chambermaid left in the room for me. I didn’t care that she had already been bitten many times.

When I finished I became aware of something else. A scent, it called to me, stronger than the blood of the dead woman in my grasp. I dropped her and began searching for the source of the scent. It was intoxicating, more so than any whiskey or ale could ever be. The source of the scent was a beautiful blonde woman, who called herself my sire. I tried to grab her and pull her to me so I could hold and be as close as possible to the source of that aroma, but she growled at me.

When she growled it was like I lost all ability to think or act for myself. I found myself cowering down in front of her, desperate to please her in anyway. I knew immediately, I was to be submissive to her in all ways. She circled around me, inspecting me, growling softly all the while. I needed something from this woman, but I did not understand what, or how to let her know I needed it. The sounds coming from me were pathetic. Whines, purrs, soft growls, anything to please this woman who called herself my sire. And the hunger, the hunger I had woken with, was still there, almost overshadowing my need to please this woman.

She stripped me and chained me up. Then she beat me with whips, chains, paddles, and belts. I loved it. Then she started sprinkling water on me, it burned and ate holes through my skin, but it pleased my sire. So I endured it. Silently. If I made any noise at all she would be displeased with me and punish me horribly. It was very, very easy to make her unhappy. I still don’t know what I did, but at one point she poured the entire bottle of holy water on my cock.

I screamed and howled in pain, which seemed to please her because she began to kiss and lick all the places on my body where she had so mercilessly tortured me before. The pain and the pleasure mingled together until I couldn’t separate them.

Then a man entered the room. He smelled remarkably like the woman who called herself my sire, but somehow it wasn’t as appealing as her scent. She told me the man was the Master and her sire. That he could and would use me in anyway he saw fit, as would she. The Master wasted no time, before I even knew he was behind me, he was fucking me. My sire, my beautiful sire, laughed and laughed. She taunted me, asking me had I ever been with a man before. I hadn’t, nor had I been with a woman, but by the end of that night I knew all the agony and ecstasy men and women could do to each other.

They had their pleasure with me over and over again. The Master taught me how to fuck my sire, by fucking me. With his cock in my ass, and mine in her pussy they simultaneously stripped my virginity. When they finished with me that night, they left me chained high enough so that my feet didn’t touch the floor. As dawn approached I mercifully passed out.

The next night they didn’t even allow me to feed before it started again. My shoulders were dislocated from hanging in the chains, and still they had their way with me. The Master was fucking me again and Darla was sucking me. Then I did the unforgivable, I came without permission, in Darla’s mouth. She forced me to eat a holy wafer. Just before the sun rose, they allowed me to feed. This time the human was fresh; no one else had fed from it. But still something was missing. I needed something from her and I still didn’t know what.

**

Anya lay gasping beneath Xander, he’d taken her four times now, without ever going limp, or stopping for breath. She knew he didn’t care about her satisfaction, but god, she couldn’t even count the number of times she’d come. She gazed at the vampire that was now her husband. She had her legs wrapped around his waist. Xander was supporting his weight on his hands. He was still thrusting into her, but his attention was elsewhere.

He was locked with Spike. They were feeding from each other, right above her head. Erotic, she thought as she came again, watching them. Spike was caressing his childe’s brow ridges. Like a kitten leaning into its mother’s tongue, Xander slowly turned his head from side to side, begging for more contact with his sire. Both men were purring.

“You’re my childe.” Spike roared as he let go of Xander’s neck and pushed him away, “Order of Aurelius, Sole Chide of Spike, Favorite Child of Angelus, Childe of Drusilla also Childe of Angelus, Favorite childe of Darla, Daughter of the Master of our Line!”

“Your girlfriend was your mother and your sister? Dude, that’s sick!” Xander came through the demon for just a second, and then he roared in ascent. The demon took control of him again.

**

Giles continued to read.

They kept me chained up for at least a week, repeating the acts of that first night. When I came to again, I had been unchained, my arms and shoulders repaired and my body had been bathed. Darla was lying naked in bed beside me. She asked if I was ready to be bound to her, to belong to her and only her for eternity. All I knew was the scent coming from her was irresistible, I agreed. She warned me not to come without permission and then she took me. She fucked me, sucked me, and sodomized me. She whispered suddenly in my ear, you may come now, and when she did she sank her fangs into me and sucked my blood, I came harder than I ever had in my life. I desperately wanted to drink from her, but couldn’t. I wasn’t allowed. When I had finished coming she growled her permission to drink from her. At the first taste of her rich blood I was coming again, and I knew I would be hers for eternity, what I had needed was her blood. “My childe” she growled out and took me again.

At some point in time, others, men and women, my siblings, aunts and uncles, joined us. We had an orgy: blood, sex, and pain. Biting, fucking, sucking, scratching, ripping flesh, for days it seemed it went on. Occasionally someone would bring a few humans and we would drink from them en masse.

**

“My childe, mine!” Spike whispered, still in game face. He lapped the newest bite on Xander’s body and gently stroked the ridged brows of his forehead, calming his childe. It wasn’t finished though, and all three of them knew it. The demon controlling Xander was demanding he satisfy his sire. The way the woman had satisfied him. Each time his sire resisted his advances his desperation grew.

**

Tara continued to read.

I don’t know how long I lived like that. It could have been days, it could have been weeks. All I knew was I had to please my sire. Eventually, I felt a change and realized my fangs had ascended and the brow ridges were gone. I was then given clothes and Darla took me to hunt. I knew my senses were heightened in the cavern we were staying in, but I hadn’t realized how much until I stepped into the night.

I could smell the town below us and hear the carriage wheels. We walked for miles. Before we even reached the lights of the town I could hear the heartbeats of the humans around us. With a growl, Darla gave me permission to hunt. I fed from probably four people that night, before she took me back to the cavern for another orgy of sire blood and sex.

That was the pattern of my life. Hunt, feed, fuck for years. I obeyed Darla’s every whim and command and then one day she made a new childe, Liam. Whom she soon renamed Angelus. She immediately forgot about me. Apparently he enjoyed pain and torture I couldn’t even imagine. I wasn’t ‘demon’ enough nor man enough for her anymore. I slipped away from her one night, and she never even looked for me.

The sense of abandonment was overwhelming. Darla created me. My only existence was to please her. Without her I was nothing.

Everyone was silent until Giles said, “Good heavens, look at the time, it’s almost sunrise. I suggest we retire. Buffy, if you could take over the shop around 1:00? I don’t believe Anya will make it to work until Xander is himself.”

“Um, yeah Giles sure.” Buffy had plenty of thoughts that she was more than happy to leave with. Every section of the book was now being played out in her head in Technicolor.

The four girls walked along in silence until Dawn finally spoke up, “Do you think it was like that for Spike?”

“Spike had to contend with Drusilla, Angelus, and Darla, I’m sure it was much worse for him than Marc.” Buffy answered without thinking.

“Does that mean he’s gay?” Buffy almost tripped over her own feet, stunned at her sister’s question. She didn’t know how to answer; the thought had never even occurred to her. It was disturbing how many vampiric customs had become facts of life to her.

Mercifully, Tara answered, “Dawnie, it’s not the person that craves those things. It’s the demon.”

“Do you think he tortured Xander?” Dawn’s voice was barely a whisper as she asked her last question.

“I don’t think Anya would let him.” Willow carefully answered. They didn’t speak anymore, each lost in their own thoughts, wondering what if anything was going on in the apartment across town.

**

As the sun came up over Sunnydale in the apartment across town, three naked bodies lay sleeping, entwined on the tangled sheets, with Xander in the middle, human face intact.

As ordered, Buffy relieved Giles at the Magic Box at 1:00. She noticed for the first time how much Giles had aged since they had first met. His eyes were red rimmed and bloodshot. His usually perfect posture was slumped and defeated. The lines she had once thought of as laugh lines were now deeply etched wrinkles scoring his handsome face.

"Buffy, you're here." He looked up from the display he was rearranging and managed a small smile.

"As ordered, all present and accounted for. Why don't you go home and get some sleep?" She tried her best not to sound overly concerned or patronizing.

"Yes, Buffy, I think I shall." Giles retrieved his keys from under the counter and with great relief made his way home.

Buffy sat down on the stool behind the counter, not looking forward to the long afternoon. Sighing she rested her elbows on the counter, and propped her chin on her fists and waited.

An hour later the bell tinkled at the door. Looking up, she smiled as her best friend entered the store.

"Any word yet?" The red-haired witch questioned.

"Not a peep." Buffy shook her head for emphasis.

"That's a good thing, right?"

"I don't know." Buffy admitted, not knowing what else to say.

"Is Dawn here?" Willow sensed Buffy’s discomfort and changed the subject for the time being.

Buffy shook her head.

"Morgaine called and wanted to start our training this afternoon." Willow offered to change the conversation.

The bell over the shop door rang again. Both girls looked up expecting Dawn. A couple of girls Willow recognized from the psuedo-wicca group came in and started browsing. Willow rolled her eyes. "They won't buy anything, except maybe candles. Wouldn't know a real witch if they met one."

The best friends looked at each other, exchanging more with their eyes than they could with words. They were both terrified for Xander. If he survived the transformation soul intact, he would be what he'd loathed for so many years. If he didn't he'd be dead. Neither option was appealing. Dead Xander was just that, dead and gone. A surviving Xander would have emotional scarring and be different on a basic fundamental level. There was no way either of them could help him through it either.

The college students finally left, each holding a bag with an earthy-scented candle in it, just as Dawn came in.

"Heard anything?" Dawn looked from her sister to Willow hopefully.

Buffy and Willow both shook their heads, and a troubled quiet settled over the three.

After a few minutes Dawn spoke again, "I wonder what Xander will be like, and what he's going through."

The three girls looked at each other for several long minutes before Buffy finally broke the silence. "Spike told me a long time ago that 'becoming a vampire is a profound and powerful experience.' I guess he'll be different, but he'll still be Xander."

"On the bright side, Dawnie, it's time to start training. Ready?" Willow gathered her books and materials and gestured towards the door.

"Yeah. Call us if you hear anything." Dawn gave her sister an impulsive peck on the cheek; she looked so lost and helpless, standing there with nothing to slay and no way to help.

"You got it." Buffy forced a smile for Dawn’s sake.

The two witches left the shop leaving Buffy to watch over the store. She returned to the stool, resumed her previous posture and waited some more.

**
Spike awoke hungry. He gently extricated himself from the tangle of limbs and, heedless as ever of his nudity, went in search of the blood that remained from the previous night. He found it still in the tub, only a few packs remaining. He grabbed one and quickly drank it down, not bothering to heat it. He found a phone and called the Magic Box, hoping Buffy was there.

"Magic Box, may I help you?" God, he could hear the worry in her voice leeching through the phone lines.

"'S me luv." He tossed the empty blood packet in the garbage and started looking for a light.

"Spike! Oh my god. What's going on over there? Did Xander wake up?" Once Buffy's initial relief was out of the way, she couldn't stop the questions from tumbling forth.

"He woke last night, but 'Xander' never overpowered the demon. We need some more blood, pet. Can you bring some when you close up?" Spike cocked an ear towards the bedroom as he spoke, carefully listening for any indication of his childe waking.

"More blood? Spike, I brought more blood last night than you eat in a week! How can you be out already?"

"Not out yet, luv, but we will be shortly after he wakes up again. Fledglings need more blood than masters. Got to be human too. Can you get it, or should I send Anya to Willy's?"

"I'll get it. Can I see him?"

"Not yet. Just knock when you get here and leave it outside." Spike lit up a cigarette and took a deep drag.

"Is he gonna be alright?" So many questions that Spike didn't have the answers to. He doubted the others knew it, but he felt just as powerless as everybody else. Maybe more so.

"Won't know 'til 'Xander' takes control. We got ‘im in time. The change hadn't started. He's truly mine. I gave him all the blood he would take when I transferred the bond. When he woke, I let him have all of mine he wanted, and most of the human you brought over. Usually sires are selfish with their blood, to keep their fledges dependent on them as long as possible. I want ‘im independent from me at his own rate. Don't wanna stifle him by withholding what ‘e needs. Physically he's a strong, powerful vampire. He's stronger than any fledgling I've ever seen. Already he's as strong as I was when I killed my first Slayer. Don't know about the rest yet." Spike crushed out his cigarette and blew out the last of the smoke in his dead lungs.

"How's Anya?" Buffy tried to keep the so-called jealousy out of her voice.

"Sleeping. They both are; I just woke up. Gonna go back to sleep though. He's gonna be a handful when he finally comes through."

A roar came from the bedroom; Xander was awake and ready to feed. Spike ran to the bedroom just in time to see his childe sink his fangs into Anya. One short snarl from Spike and Xander was cowering in a corner, shoulders slumped, head down, begging for blood. "No time to talk luv, bye."

"Uh, ok. I'll drop the blood by. Tell him we love him and when he's ready we want to see him." Vaguely she realized he'd hung up on her before she even spoke.

Anya was awake and holding her hand on the wounds on her neck. "Did he drink?" Spike asked.

"No, you stopped him in time." She fumbled for a tissue from the nightstand to blot at the minor wound on her neck.

"Go heat up all the blood we've got left. It'll have to do until Buffy gets here with more."

Spike surveyed the scene as Anya quickly got out of bed, not bothering with a robe, following Spike's orders without question. Xander had almost killed her and she knew it. At the core she was a demon. It gave her additional strength and allowed her to heal from injury sooner, but if he drained her, she'd still die.

The naked vampire on the bed was shaking from hunger and fear. Growling softly Spike let Xander know he was angry, as he'd not given permission to feed. Xander's posture became even more submissive, a soft whine escaping his throat. Spike knelt in front of Xander, possessively caressing his ridges.

When Anya entered the bedroom, the sight in front of her flooded her with arousal. Both vampires were in game face. Spike was sitting up, propped against the headboard. Xander was straddling Spike facing him, greedily feeding from his sire's neck, their erections rubbing together. Both of their eyes were closed, expressions of ecstasy on their faces. She felt the wetness of her desire flowing down her naked thighs. Two pair of golden eyes peered at her, fully conscious of her arousal.

Timidly she crawled onto the bed beside the two vampires. Spike growled softly at Xander and he reluctantly stopped feeding from his sire. Looking at his sire for permission he grabbed a bag of blood from Anya and quickly drank it down. At another nod from Spike, Xander devoured the remaining bags of blood. While he fed, Anya crept closer. Spike draped his arms on the back of the headboard and Anya snuggled into his side. Tentatively she reached toward Xander. With a feather light touch she caressed his brow ridges, while he fed. Immediately Xander began to purr. Encouraged by his response she continued her exploration of his new features.

When he'd finished the last of the blood in the apartment, Xander turned his amber eyes to Anya. He happily turned his head from side to side under Anya's gentle touch. ‘Vampires’, she mused, ‘weren't much different from lions, panthers, or any of the great felines.’ They hunted and killed brutally. They took their physical pleasure whenever, wherever, and with whomever they wanted. They purred, licked, bit, nuzzled, and loved being stroked. Dreamily she recalled bits and pieces of the night before. Xander lapping at her pussy, deep rumbling purrs tickling her better than any vibrator ever had while Spike rammed into him at the same time. The memory turned her on even more.

The scent of her arousal was driving Xander insane. Somewhere deep within he knew this female was his and his alone. His sire had proved that by not touching her in any sexual way, reaffirming the instinctual knowledge she was his. His sire had vexed him by not forcing his submission earlier. He'd begged, pleaded, and wept before his sire had taken him and asserted his dominion over him.

Remembering the ecstasy of fucking the female while his sire had fucked him, combined with the tang of her arousal, made his already already-erect cock twitch in anticipation. A questioning rumble emitted from his throat. In response Spike pushed Xander's head between Anya's thighs. Without hesitation Xander fastened his mouth on her dripping slit and began to eat her out.

"Xander, oh Xander, god, feel so good," she moaned and spread her legs farther to allow him better access. One of her legs went in between Spike's. His erection pressed against her thigh, heightening her arousal. Anya desperately wanted to be taken by both vampires. She'd not had two male lovers at once since her previous demon days. She knew it was only Spike's love of Buffy and surprising consideration of Xander that held him back. He'd told her as much after Xander had gone to sleep between them. She squirmed under Xander's tongue, unconsciously rubbing Spike's cock with her thigh. Still resting in the crook of Spike's arm, fingers entwined in Xander's hair she began to shake. The leg that wasn't on Spike she wrapped around Xander's shoulder, pulling him closer to her center.

Anya was panting heavily, her heart rate increasing quickly. The pheromones she was pumping out were driving both men insane with need. Just when she thought she would die without release Xander plunged three fingers into her sopping hole and sank one fang into her clit. She screamed, her eyes rolled back in her head; she almost passed out from the pleasure. Xander continued to pump his fingers inside her to draw out her orgasm. Minutes later when her quaking had stopped, he removed his fingers and plunged his tongue inside her, sucking out all of her juices, while he wriggled one finger in her ass; she came again.

Feeling the heat of Anya's body as she writhed against him and watching his childe greedily swallow down her come was severely testing Spike's limits. He desperately wished Buffy were here as only she could truly satisfy his need. He wondered how long it would be before he could have her again, if ever. His cock was rapidly turning red from his own need. Spike lightly brushed his fingertips up and down Anya's arm, wishing he could take both her and his childe. With his other hand he began slowly sliding his closed fist up and down the length of his erection, swiping the head with his thumb on each up stroke.

Fully aware of his sire's needs, Xander slammed into Anya. He grabbed her by the shoulders and pulled her body out of Spike's embrace. When her head was level with Spike's hips, Xander began to slowly fuck her. Taking full advantage of his new position, he shifted his upper body away from Anya and took his sire's cock in his mouth.

Spike hissed as his childe began to deep throat him, a one skill among many, he had learned the previous night. Grabbing the hair at the back of Xander's head Spike pulled him away. "You don't have to do that." His voice was deep and gravely with desire.

Like the night before he gave his childe a chance to overcome the demon, knowing full well 'Xander' would be repulsed by the demon's actions when he took control. The demon snarled at him and took him in his mouth again. Spike remained propped against the headboard and watched while Xander fucked Anya, and simultaneously gave him head.

Spike knew Anya had received more pleasure from Xander in the past 24 hours than she had the entire time they'd been together. Vampires were not necessarily better lovers than humans, but their heightened predatory senses gave them a distinct advantage. Vampires are always in tune with their environment. If that environment happened to be between someone's legs, bully for them. The sounds, tremors, aromas, heart rate, and breathing enticed the demon to wring out any and all responses from their sexual partner until complete satiation was reached. Wryly he wondered if Anya would still brag about their sex life, especially now that she had something to brag about.

Anya screamed her release yet again, Xander followed immediately behind her. Turning his complete attention to his sire, Xander, sucked, nibbled, and licked his sire's cock until he happily swallowed the cool come. Spent for the moment, the three demons drifted off to sleep again.

**
Buffy warily approached the apartment. She desperately wanted to go inside and see what was going on. She pressed her ear against the door. Hearing nothing, she shrugged, rapped the door a few times, put the cooler full of blood on the floor, and went home to wait some more.

**
Spike sensed Buffy the moment she stepped off the elevator. He smiled as she hesitated and wondered if she would burst through the door and find out why exactly curiosity killed the cat. When she actually followed his directions and left he was stunned. On the other side of Xander Anya woke again. "Blood's outside the door, kitten. Why don't you bring it in and warm it up?"
At the sound of his sire's voice, Xander woke. He watched his female leave the bedroom and pressed his body against Spike. Hungrily he ran his hands down the plane of cool, hard muscles of his sire's chest and abdomen. Fascinated he watched the muscles twitch under his hands. Spike couldn't resist any longer, he had to taste his childe. He'd never known the bliss of a childe's blood before last night. He pulled Xander to him, sank his fangs into his neck and drank greedily. There was nothing in the world like it. The taste, the texture, the scent of his own blood mixed with Xander's was intoxicating. He finally knew why Angelus had drunk from him so often.

Angelus however, had been a bastard of a sire, only allowing Spike to drink from him on rare occasion. Severe injury or a rare and fleeting moment of tenderness for his childe was were the only times he allowed it. Spike had no intentions of treating his only childe in the same manner. Fledglings needed their sire's blood as much as human blood to gain strength and control. With a soft rumble, he granted permission for Xander to drink from him.

Anya found the two vampires feeding hungrily from each other, bodies writhing in ecstasy. She desperately wanted Xander to take her as his mate and bind him to her with her own blood, but she knew it wasn't time. 'Xander' had yet to come through and, until he did, she couldn't risk it. Until he controlled the demon, he wouldn't be able to stop feeding until she was dead.

She sat on the bed with 10 heated bags of human blood and waited for them to notice her. She knew that every time they drank from each other the sire-childe bond was strengthened. She sent a quick prayer to D'Hoffryn that Xander could somehow deal with the bond he would now have forever with Spike. In many ways the sire-childe bond was stronger than the mating bond. As much as Xander hated Spike, it was likely he would stake himself or try to kill his sire when he finally came through.

Spike roughly extracted his fangs from his childe and forcefully pushed him away. Xander protested. The demon residing in him desperately needed contact with his sire. At the sight of the bagged blood on the bed he understood the loss. He needed human blood as well. Receiving permission he fed. Spike quickly drained three bags himself and wondered if the hunger in his childe would finally abate long enough for the soul to emerge. When Xander finished the last bag and growled for more, Spike began to wonder exactly how strong the demon inside Xander was. With a warning not to feed from Anya, Spike went to heat up more blood for his childe.

When Spike left the room the remaining vampire turned to Anya and spoke his first English words in game face. "Are you my mate?"

"When we were human, we were married." A feeling of relief coursed through him. This woman was his, and when he was given permission he would take her as his mate again. He roughly drew her into his arms and began scenting her head to toe, memorizing her smell so he would always recognize her as his.

He felt his sire return to the room and was relieved to find more blood. Spike dropped a cooler full of blood on the floor, all heated to 98.6, "Feed, it's all yours." Xander crawled to the cooler and knelt at his sire's feet head bowed in gratitude. Spike ran a hand through Xander's hair. He found his jeans and pulled them on while Xander fed.

Spike lit a cigarette and studied the changes that had taken place in Xander's body. His skin had lightened, but he was young enough to still maintain a human like quality. He noted with satisfaction that the demon's metabolism had drained some of the weight Xander had put on as a human. Spike knew that when Xander started to train with him and Buffy, the boy would quickly regain the physique he'd had in high school. Spike had never understood why Xander had let his body go to fat since his engagement to Anya. Demons and humans alike who didn't take care of their bodies disgusted him on a level he couldn't begin to describe. Perhaps it was because as a human he'd been so weak.

When he was first turned, Angelus had forced him to train with weapons, hand-to-hand fighting, and weights. Drusilla's compliments about his new muscles had driven him to develop them faster. He'd begun to do sit ups, push-ups, among other exercises to make himself more physically appealing to his family. The results had been well worth it, he mused, as he ran his hand over his eight-pack abs. Women and men, vampire, demon, and human alike had desired and pursued him for over a century. Before he realized he was in love with Buffy, he'd reveled in his various lovers. The celibacy he'd experienced after proclaiming his love for Buffy went against every vampiric instinct he had.

Whether or not Buffy loved him, he knew she loved his body. These days he was leaner, more defined and stronger than he had ever been. Part of that was from training with Buffy. She challenged him to be stronger, faster, better, because she WAS stronger, faster and better than he was. He chuckled to himself as he recalled increasing his 100 sit ups and push ups a day to 500 so he could keep up with her. The results though had been worth it. Buffy did worship his body. Crushing out his cigarette, he tossed Anya her robe and they both sat at the end of the bed and watched Xander feed
.
With each bag of blood he drank, his skin became perceptibly lighter. As the empty bags started to outnumber the full Spike worried even more. Where was Xander? Was the demon within him so strong that even his magickally reinforced soul couldn't come through?

Mid-bag, Spike and Anya heard the familiar bone crunching sounds indicating the demon withdrew. A look of pure horror crossed Xander's face as he realized he was drinking blood. Why was he naked? What was Spike doing here? Suddenly the sound of Anya's beating heart pierced his consciousness and he knew.

'I'm a vampire, Spike's my sire, and I, he, we, the three of us, oh God! Oh God Oh God Oh God Oh God Oh God...' Tears streamed down his face and he sobbed brokenly. He remembered every sordid, disgusting detail from the night before. How he had begged for Spike's touch, his blood. With growing horror he remembered trying to feed from Anya, his wife! He'd almost killed her, would have if Spike hadn't stopped him. He was shaking uncontrollably from his tears, his horror, revulsion at himself, and fear. He didn't notice Anya's warm arms holding him, or the cool muscular body of his sire holding both of them. He was lost in despair and self-loathing.

Anya met Spike's eyes over Xander's head. She noticed Spike's rumbling purr designed to comfort his childe and started murmuring soothingly to him herself. She held Xander to her breast and comforted him as best she could. She was grateful to lean into Spike's embrace as he held them both. After what felt like hours Xander's sobs started to subside. "W-wh-what h- h-h-happened?"

After a nod from Spike, Anya relayed the events to Xander. He was taken, turned, recovered. He hadn't killed anyone, he had his soul, the 'power returned' in the prophecy was him becoming a vampire. Everyone still loved him and wanted to see him. It wasn't his fault and she loved him more than life itself and would stay with him forever.

With her affirmation that she still loved him and wanted to be with him forever, Xander started crying again. He was dead. He would never see the sun again. He and Anya could never have children. He would never have his own construction company if he couldn't go out in the sun. Everything he had lost was racing through his mind; he was overcome with grief and wallowing in self-pity.

Eventually his crying slowed down again and he realized he was in Spike's arms. His human persona ignored the demon screaming inside of him that this was his sire and he loved him. With Anya still in his arms, he jumped out of the embrace and screamed at Spike, "Get the fuck away from us, you perverted, depraved, filthy beast. Don't ever touch me or my wife again."

"Xander, stop it!" Anya yelled at him, pushing him away from her, infuriated Xander would treat Spike that way after everything he had done for both of them.

" 'S'allright, kitten, let him get it out." Spike said without a single hint of the pain he felt at the words. Although Xander's hatred of him was not unexpected, he was still his sire, and surprisingly enough he found that he loved his childe. More than he had ever loved another vampire, including his own sires Angelus and Drusilla. ‘Must be the bond,’ he mused. Confidently he lit a cigarette and took a deep drag. "Let him have his say."

Xander found a pair of pants on the bedroom floor and quickly pulled them on. In the back of his mind he registered the once too tight jeans now fit loosely. "You did this to me, you made me like you because you hate me. You, You, You, raped me! You forced me to, to, I can't even say it! How dare you touch my wife? Did you fuck her while I was asleep? I’m going to killyou!" Looking around frantically for a weapon and not finding any he broke off the leg of a nearby chair, and leapt at Spike, ready to stake him.

Smirking around his cigarette, Spike growled and his eyes flashed yellow. Xander's body reacted without his control. His body twisted mid leap like a cat falling out of a tree. He landed on his feet, crouching submissively at Spike's feet. A low whine escaped his throat before he could stop it. He was appalled at his reaction to Spike and didn't understand it. Another growl from Spike and Xander flung the stake across the room. Disobeying every instinct in his new body he looked Spike right in the eye. "What in the fucking hell did you to me?"

Spike crushed out his cigarette and lit a new one. He casually stood up and stretched, flexing every muscle in his perfect body. With sadistic delight he watched Xander's reaction. The boy was definitely fighting the demon inside him. A mixture of hatred and painful desire was coming off the boy.

"What in the fucking hell did you do to me?" Xander yelled again. He couldn't get his body to move no matter how hard he tried.

"Well, boy, I'm controlling you. Didn't want to do it like this but you're forcing me to."

Xander whimpered helplessly at his feet as Spike slowly circled him. Roughly Spike grabbed him by his hair and forced Xander to look at him. With less than a quarter inch between their faces Spike began to speak.

"I did NOT do this to you." Xander started to protest but a rumble from Spike effectively shut him up. "The Master's right hand kidnapped you and turned you. Name was Maverick if you're interested. I challenged him for you and killed him. You don't ever have to worry about ‘im again. The Wiccas re-souled you, and I transferred the sire-childe bond to myself on order from Buffy, Giles, and hell everybody. I did not rape you, you bloody buggerin' ass. I didnot touch your wife. In fact I kept you from killing her, you fucking imbecile.

"I tried like hell to stop any sexual relations between us because I knew how you would react. Unfortunately the demon inside you had other ideas. If you would use what little brain you had in your thick fucking skull, you would remember that." Spike's voice softened slightly and a far away look entered his eyes. "I don't want to be forced to control you, Xander. I don't want to treat you the way Angelus treated me, but if you disrespect and disobey me I'll make your unlife bleedin' hell. You'll find out first hand why the Order of Aurelius is feared throughout the world. Torture is what we do best." Instinctively Spike knew a part of Xander's reaction was a form of homophobia and he tried to placate him as well as he could.

"The demon inside you needs blood from me as well as physical intimacy. It doesn't have anything to do with being human or being gay and everything to do with being a vampire. No one but us knows what happened here last night or today and no one ever will. I swear that to you. I asked Anya to stay hoping that sex with your wife would satisfy your demon and you wouldn't need me. Your demon is strong, Harris, and it would still be in control right now if I had taken you the way you begged me to." When Spike finished he released his hold on Xander and stepped away from him, waiting for his words to penetrate the boys fogged brain.

Xander listened intently to everything Spike was saying even though he was trying like hell to ignore him. He searched inside himself and knew everything he was hearing was true. The demon inside him forced itself forward again, his true face emerging. "I'm sorry, sire." The voice was Xander's but it was deepened by the demon within. Suddenly the demon withdrew, leaving a shaken Xander crying at Spike's feet.

"Stand up, Xander." Xander stood and wiped at the tears coursing down his face. "Be your own man, vampire, whatever. But you will obey me. Until I am sure you can control the demon in you, you're not leaving my sight. I've got a lot to teach you. Now if you would like to call the Scoobies and let them know you're all right you can. BUT," Spike pointed a finger at Xander. "Until I give permission you can NOT see them."

"Why the hell not?" Xander defiantly asked.

Spike chuckled at the boy's disobedience; it reminded him of himself. "You would go insane with the need to feed with that many heartbeats surrounding you. Can you hear Anya's heart thundering?" Xander almost imperceptibly nodded.

"Imagine all the Scoobies here and what that would sound like. And don't forget the Slayer. The scent of her alone will bring the demon out of you. I don't want to control you and bend you to my will in front of your mates, or at all, really. Can you get that through your thick bloody skull?"

Again a slight nod from Xander was all the confirmation he received. "When you leave the comfort of your home, your senses are going to assault you. I want you in complete control before we ‘ave any contact with anyone at all other than Anya. There's a reason her presence innit distracting you more than it already is."

Confused, Xander looked at Anya and realized she was wearing her pendant and the implications. "When?"

"Our wedding night. Morgaine told me what was going to happen to you." She shrugged, "I knew I needed my powers back if we were going to be together. Don't worry, though, I'm not really a Vengeance Demon again. I only got back some of my powers. No wish granting here." Anya cheerfully smiled at him and embraced him. "You'd break me during sex if I hadn't gotten some of my strength back. Your strength is amazing. You're almost as strong as Spike now."

A smile of pride flitted across Spike's face. "'S'true. I've never encountered a fledgling as strong as you before. I need to teach you how to control and use your new strength and powers, do you think you can bloody well listen to me?"


"I'm the strongest fledgling you've ever seen?" This time the prideful smile stayed on Spike's face as he nodded. Xander sighed deeply. This was his life now. He needed to make the most of it and god knew he'd rather have Spike as his sire than Angel. "I'll obey, I'll listen, and I'll learn, but respect will come slowly." He acquiesced. Surprising himself, his wife and his sire, he stuck his hand out to Spike.


Spike gripped his hand in return and pulled Xander into an embrace. "You do all that, my childe, and I swear I'll never let Angel fuck you." Spike smirked when he felt Xander tense in his arms, realizing Angel was his sire's sire and could do whatever he wanted to with him. "I'll keep you safe forever, I swear." Spike nuzzled into Xander's neck, and with a short growl the two vampires fed from each other again.

"Spike, when can I bind Xander to me? I don't like him drinking blood that's not yours or mine." Anya held a strange combination of worry and arousal in her face as she looked at the two males locked together every bit as intimately as if they were having sex.

Releasing Xander, Spike looked back and forth between his childe and Anya. "Sooner than I thought, Anya, sooner than I thought. Go call your mates, Xander. They're worried about you. If you really need to see them Willow and Giles can come, but no one else."

Relief coursed through Xander. He desperately needed Willow. If anyone, Willow would be the one who could help him more than Anya and Spike. He knew he wasn't ready to face anyone else and he shakily dialed the phone. It was picked up on the first ring.

"Hello?" The sound of Willow's voice was music to his ears.

“Wills? It's Xander, can you come over by yourself?"

"Xander! Oh Goddess, I've been so worried, are you ok?" Relief started to wash over her like a giant tidal wave.

"Wills! I'm fine, or as fine as I can be. Spike said I could see you, but not anyone else. Will you come here?" It was evident from Xander’s tone that he had missed Willow every bit as much as she had missed him.

"Why can't you see anyone else?" Willow asked curiously.

"Something about heartbeats, slayer scent, and the need to feed. I don't really know but I need you. And can you pick up some more human blood?"

"I'm on my way, Xander. I'll bring as much blood as I can find. I don't know if Willy's got anymore or not." Willow was so excited that she hung up the phone before she finished her sentence.

"Thanks, Wills." Xander hung up the phone and decided to go take a shower. He didn't want to smell like sex when Willow got there.

Chapter 11 - Scent of Willow

In his lair, the Master roared in rage. In his fury he dusted a dozen of the vampires closest to him. His eyes searched the unholy mass gathered before him. “Maverick has failed me and the boy was taken.” Peering at the vampiric faces in front of him, his eyes settled on Trinity. “Come here Grandchilde, Childe of Darla, my most delightful wicked progeny. You will be my right hand.”

Trinity bowed before him. “Your wish is my command, Master.”

“There are humans who believe themselves responsible for my resurrection. They think that I will follow their orders. Destroy them.” He snarled.

“Who are they, Master? Where are they? Tell me so I can annihilate them.” A feral smile spread across her face in anticipation of slaughter and mayhem.

“Barristers; in Los Angeles you will find them here.” With a wave of his hand, an image of a sky scraper in downtown LA was shone to the room. “Go!”

*

Willow dropped the phone and turned around to face her friends. The smile on her face let everyone know Xander was ok.

“Let’s go, let’s go, let’s go, we’ve got to see Xander.” Dawn squealed bouncing up and down in her excitement.

“I’ll go get some more blood.” Buffy offered and strode towards the door.

“NO!” Willow yelled, then clearing her throat started again quieter, “I mean, no, you guys can’t come with me.”

“What?” Tara, Buffy, Dawn, and Giles said in synchronicity.

“Why not?” Buffy demanded hands on her hips.

“Spike said I’m the only one who can come right now.” The redhead stared at the floor, unwilling to meet all the questioning gazes being directed at her.

“I’m going to kill that peroxide pest. Who the hell does he think he is? Xander needs to see all of us.” Buffy’s temper was flaring and she didn’t bother to hide it as she headed towards the door.

In an uncharacteristically bold move, Tara grabbed Buffy by the arm to stop her from leaving. “He’s Xander’s sire, Buffy. If Spike says only Willow, then it’s only going to be Willow. Yy-y-you’ve got to t-trust him.”

“Xander didn’t really understand either. He said it had to do with heart beats, feeding, and Slayer scent.” Willow offered helpfully.

Giles was nodding his head in understanding. “It really does. Xander probably came through just this minute, and Spike’s testing his control slowly. I imagine our combined presence would overwhelm Xander and bring his demon to the fore, particularly, um, Slayer scent. With Willow being his oldest friend, it would stand to reason she’d be the first he’d want to see.” Giles couldn’t quite hide his disappointment from the others. They grumbled but finally accepted his reasoning.

“Didn’t you already drop some blood off today?” Dawn asked Buffy.

“Yeah, I can’t believe they’re finished with it already.” Buffy tried to remember how many packets had been in the cooler she’d left.

“Fledglings need more blood than masters.” Giles offered and watched enviously as Willow left. The remaining Scoobies could do nothing else but wait. Again.

*

“Shower’s free,” Xander yelled from the bedroom.

“Go ahead kitten; I need to talk to Xander some more ‘fore Red gets here.” Spike motioned Anya toward the vacated bathroom.

She padded into the bedroom and watched as Xander pulled a white sleeveless undershirt on. She was stunned at the changes in his body. He was leaner, his muscles slightly more defined, and his skin was much paler than it had been only hours before. She pulled him into an embrace and was shocked again at the coolness of his body. Xander nuzzled into her throat and drank her scent in. “Spike wants to talk to you some more before Willow gets here, so I’m gonna shower, ok?” Xander nodded and went to face Spike.

He found him smoking on the balcony. As soon as Xander stepped into the night air he felt alive. His awareness spread infinitely into the night. He could smell the McDonald’s more than four miles away and hear the heartbeats of the people walking in the parking lot. He realized that with his new vision it seemed almost light as day. Suddenly he felt a wrenching pull tugging at his awareness, beckoning him, calling him. Without realizing it he slipped into game face. Immediately his awareness spread even farther into the endless night and the pull grew stronger than before. A low growl escaped his throat as he tried to regain control over the demon within him. “Why do I feel like this?”

“Like what?” Spike knew exactly what Xander was referring to, but he wanted his childe to suss it out on his own.

“There’s something out there. It’s like it’s calling to me but I don’t know what it is.” Xander’s eyes briefly flashed yellow, completely unbidden by him.

“It’s the Master. Master of our line, commanding us and any vampire within the range of the call to come to him.” Spike took a long drag from his cigarette, letting the smoke curl slowly up from his lips as Xander processed the information.

“It’s awful. Does it ever stop?”

“Hasn’t stopped since he returned. Bloody damn near impossible to refuse, even for me.” Spike admitted affecting a casual shrug. “I almost went the moment it started.”

“What stopped you?” The young brunette looked at his sire inquisitively.

“Dawn screamed. Nibblet’s more important than anythin’; she’s mine to protect for as long as she lives.” Spike studied a ragged hangnail on his thumb while speaking.

“Can you block it out?”

Spike shook his head and flicked his cigarette over the balcony. Xander watched, entranced, at as the trail of light until it landed on the ground. “No way to block it, no way to stop it. You just ‘ave to fight it, Harris. Binding you to your wife will eliminate most of it, but until he’s destroyed its gonna be there.”

“What is this binding the two of you keep talking about?” Xander’s head was swimming with all the new information he was trying to process.

“Look inside. The demon in you knows the answer.”

Xander filed that away for later. “You wanted to talk to me before Willow came?”

Spike nodded and lit yet another cigarette. “Can you feel the bloodlust?”

“Not really, not like I did earlier.” Xander trailed off, the memory of sinking his fangs into Anya’s neck was painful but erotic; he couldn’t quite figure that out.

“As soon as you feel the slightest inkling of it, feed immediately. If you put it off too long--”

Xander finished the statement. “Vamp out, no control, got it.”

“And the more you drink, the sooner you gain control.” Spike stood smoking in silence for a few seconds. “When Red gets here, be careful when you touch her, super strong now, don’t forget that.” Xander unconsciously moved closer to Spike until they were leaning on the balcony rail with their shoulders brushing. Upon physical contact with Spike, something inside him relaxed. “Why do I feel like this with you? Why do I need to touch you? The closer we are to each other the more relaxed I feel, why?”

“Sire-childe bond. The demon in you was born from the demon in me. Not much different from a new born and ‘is mum. The demons need each other. Family or clan is critical to survival. You physically need my blood, and will for a long time. Kind of like mother’s milk, helps you get strong. But each drink you ‘ave strengthens the bond between us.”

“Doesn’t that kind of defeat the purpose of becoming independent?”

A sneer crossed Spike’s face, “That it does. It’s a double-edged sword Xander. If you want the strength and power of my blood you have to submit to me to receive it.”

“What if I don’t drink from you again?” Xander was still a bit queasy over the idea of ingesting blood even though the demon in him clamored for it.

“Demon’ll demand physical satisfaction. Blood and sex are virtually inseparable in vampires. If you don’t get my blood you’ll need my body. Angelus was a right bastard, almost never gave me the blood.”

“God damn it! I hate this, there’s absolutely nothing I can do is there?” Xander pounded his fists into the railing, bending it. Frustration was rolling off him in waves.

Remembering his dependence on Angelus and Drusilla, Spike empathized with his childe. “Time is all there is. A few years down the road--”

“YEARS?” Xander squeaked like a girl.

“Years. Immortal now, remember? In time your dependence on me will lessen, as will my compulsion control and dominate you. Mostly it’s unconscious, like teen-age rebellion and growing into adult hood, lettin’ you leave the nest an’ all that rot. Takes about the same amount of time too.”

Both vampires heard the water quit running in the apartment and knew Anya had finished showering. “I’m gonna go clean up, if Willow gets here before I’m finished, I want you to come into the bedroom and wait for me before you see her.” Spike pitched the second cigarette over the balcony.

“I’m not gonna feed from Willow.” Xander protested vehemently, unconsciously bending the railing even more.

“Dinnit say you would.” Spike very pointedly stared at Xander’s hands. He didn’t mean to bend the railing either, but he was. Xander of course, was oblivious to the gibe.

“So why can’t I.”

“Damn it you gonna obey or not? I told you I dinnit want to control you, but I will. Its way too soon for you to have human contact unsupervised. YOU don’t want to feed from Red, I know that and so does everyone else. That demon inside you may ‘ave different ideas, and neither of the girls is gonna stake you to defend themselves.” Spike yelled, wanting to thrash Xander into submission, holding himself in check by a thread. It went against every instinct he had not to beat his childe for his insolence and take him to reassert his dominance.

“But…”

Xander didn’t even get a warning growl; Spike bitch slapped him. “That’s it; you’re not leaving my sight again until I give you permission.” Grabbing him by the back of the neck Spike pulled him inside and dragged him into the bathroom, ignoring Anya. Xander watched uncomprehendingly as Spike quickly stripped off his jeans and started the shower. “Strip.”

“What? I just took a shower.” Spike stood there naked, head tilted to the left, waiting for Xander.

“I told you, you’re not leaving my sight without permission. Strip and get in the shower.”

“No, this is ridiculous…” Spike slid into game face and snarled at him. Before Xander knew it he was naked, standing in the shower waiting for his sire. He tried with all his might to get out of the bathroom but his body refused to obey his brain. Quickly Spike stepped in the shower stall ahead of him and closed the sliding glass door behind him.

“Spike I’m not--” Another growl and Xander was cowering at his feet again, whimpering.

Spike found the shampoo and started washing his hair. When he rinsed, he spoke again. “I told you I don’t want it to be this way and neither do you. Stop forcing me.” He turned his back to Xander and found the conditioner. He squirted a small amount into his palm and nearly jumped out of his skin when he felt a lathered bath puff rubbing his back. He ran the conditioner through his short bleach blonde locks and turned around to rinse again.

Xander was kneeling in front of him, sponge in hand, demon to the fore, body quaking. Cautiously he started to wash Spike’s feet; when he wasn’t rebuffed he continued up his legs. He cautiously ran the sponge over Spike’s groin and gasped when he felt himself harden. The sponge slowly moved over Spike’s abdomen, chest, and then he trailed it down each of his arms. Spike turned around slowly and let the water sluice over his skin until the lather washed away, as Xander washed the back of his legs, buttocks, and back again. Turning once more to face Xander Spike gruffly growled and grabbed Xander by the hair. He pulled him up into a savage kiss. His tongue caressed the inside of his childe’s mouth and he quickly cut his tongue on the boy’s fangs. Xander abandoned the kiss and desperately sucked the blood seeping from his sire’s tongue.

Spike pushed Xander away and turned him around, pulling him to his wet chest. He ground his pelvis against Xander’s ass and felt the boy shake in his arms. Spike squirted a handful of shower gel into his hand and grabbed Xander’s cock. Xander hissed at the contact and sensuously rubbed against Spike. He gasped when he felt his sire harden beneath him. Spike set a deliberately slow pace designed to torment his childe. Using both hands, he stroked Xander and gathered some of the slick lather into his other hand. He stroked himself with the same rhythm he was using on the vampire trembling against him. Without warning he plunged into Xander. Matching his thrusts with his hand, he worked Xander into a frenzy. Then Spike stopped all motion; his cock was buried to the hilt in Xander’s tight passage and his fist gripped the base of the boy’s cock. “Fuck me,” Spike whispered into Xander’s ear and nipped at his earlobe.

That was all the encouragement Xander needed. He pulled himself forward until just the tip of Spike was remained in him, then with a roll of hips he impaled himself. His movement controlled the fist that was gripping his cock, finding a rhythm he liked he bucked, writhed, and rolled his hips, stimulating his prostate and his cock. He felt his balls tighten and knew it wouldn’t be long before this ecstasy ended. He realized that as soon as it did he’d be disgusted with himself and angry at Spike again. Deliberately he stopped moving, to prolong the moment as long he could.

*

“Hi Willow.” Anya greeted Willow with a chipper smile. “Come in, oh, you brought more blood, thanks.”

“So, where’s Xander?” Willow asked, eyes searching the apartment for him.

“He’s with Spike, they should be out soon.” Anya sunk down onto the couch, then gestured for Willow to join her.

“Oh, how is he?”

“He’s fine. A little shaken up. If he’d quit fighting Spike so much it’d go easier for him.” Anya said knowingly. Willow really didn’t know what to say in response, so she sat down and waited for Xander and Spike to come out.

*

“What’s the matter?” Spike asked and began tracing his fangs in an intricate pattern of Xander’s jugular.

“Right now, being here with you is all I want or need in the world.” Xander’s head lolled to the side and rested on Spike’s shoulder giving his sire better access. “But a minute after it’s over…I know I’ll hate you all over again. Part of me relishes this control you have and the rest of me wants to kill you.”

“ ‘S’normal.” Spike ran his hand over Xander smooth, slippery back, trying to soothe him.

“Really?”

“Yeah, s’easier if your sire is one of the opposite sex. You don’t get as much conflict with your old value system.” Suddenly Spike shoved Xander against the shower wall and brutally took control again. He could tell Xander was close to the edge, just like he was. He held his wrist against Xander’s mouth and sank his fangs into the boy’s throat. When he felt Xander tear into his wrist both demons climaxed with a roar.

In the living room, Willow jumped at the noise; she looked curiously at Anya, but when no explanation --or for that matter, any reaction at all-- was forthcoming, she sighed and sank further into the couch.

Spike felt Willow’s presence in the apartment and quickly dried off and dressed. Xander followed suit, tears streaming down his face. “What happened in there?” He quietly asked Spike.

“You were fighting me even though the demon inside you wanted to obey. It took control of you, to supplicate itself to me.” Spike sighed and grasped Xander by his shoulders. “If you would quit fighting with me, that wouldn’t keep happening. You’d be happy with only my blood.”

“OK, no fighting with my sire if I don’t want it up the ass, lesson learned.” Suddenly Xander’s head cocked to the side, his eyelids drooped sensually as he took a long, slow, deep breath. “What is that smell?”

“Willow. You ready?” Spike grinned cruelly at Xander’s audible gulp. ‘Teach ‘im to listen to me if it kills me.’

“I, I, I think I need to feed. Can you…” He looked nervous and unsure, almost an imitation of how he’d been before he met Buffy and his life changed.

Spike nodded, “Be right back, STAY in here.” Spike shut the door behind him and walked to the kitchen, ignoring the girls.

“Not a problem.” ‘Not a problem,’ Xander chanted to himself. His hearing was picking up two heartbeats and he struggled with all his might not to vamp out. By the time Spike returned to the bedroom Xander was curled up in fetal position on the bed whispering “not a problem” like a mantra.

He snatched the blood out of Spike’s hands and quickly devoured the three bags. “I don’t feel any better.” He looked helplessly at Spike. Spike laid a hand on Xander’s arm. With the physical contact Xander visibly relaxed.

“Do you now?” Spike asked.

“Yeah, um, don’t let go of me, ok?” Xander asked shame etched on his face, eyes glistening with unshed tears.

“I told you I’d keep you safe forever. That includes keeping your loved ones safe from you until you can control yourself.” He pulled Xander into an embrace and sucked his mark on his childe’s neck, trying to calm the demon. “If you’re not ready…”

“No, I’m ready. Just…control me if it looks like I’m slipping.” Xander looked at the door to the living room with both hope and fear.

“Promise.” Both vampires stood, Spike wrapped one arm around Xander’s shoulders and they went to see Willow.

When the door to the bedroom opened, Willow jumped up and ran towards Xander. The last thing she expected was to see him cower closer to Spike. The reaction stopped her in her tracks. “Xander?”

Xander was trembling, “Kitten, heat some more blood. We’re gonna need it.” Xander could hear Willow’s heart pounding. Her fear, and anxiety, tinged the air. He could sense her magickal essence. The sounds, and scents, her essence was overwhelming him. His trembling increased. He whimpered suddenly and shrank against Spike. At the sound of his sire’s almost but not quite subsonic purr he calmed down a little, tried to push the demon back. It wasn’t working.

“Red, you need to calm down. Xander’s in control but barely. Relax.” The microwave dinged and Xander headed straight for the kitchen, pulling Spike with him. He desperately grabbed for the blood and drank it down. He leaned into Spike’s embrace and fed until the demon retreated on its own. Willow’s heartbeat and scent were still crowding his mind, but it was easier now. “Just don’t let go and I’ll be fine.” Spike nodded wordlessly and led Xander back to the living room, proprietarily keeping an arm on his shoulder.

Xander looked at Willow and slowly opened his arms. She flew across the room and flung herself into his embrace. She burrowed herself into his embrace and started crying. Xander leaned into Spike’s strong arms and sighed in relief as Spike ran his fingers through his hair. Xander nestled his nose in her hair and drank down her scent. This scent was the essence of Willow to him; home, security, friendship, and love. Anya’s fragrance was his heart, Spike’s his security, but Willow was home. She always had been. Pulling her closer he felt her heart beat against his chest and all her fears and anxiety melt away. They could do this. He and Willow could get through anything. Xander stepped away from Spike, picked up Willow effortlessly and spun her around in a circle and laughed.

“What’s so funny, Xander?” Willow was both surprised and delighted by his joy.

“Scent of Willow.” He grinned up at her.

“Huh?” Xander turned to see Anya wrap an arm around Spike’s waist. He set Willow down and led her towards the others and pulled them into a group hug.

“You ok?” Spike asked as he ruffled Xander’s hair.

“I will be. I just got to name everything I think. So I can relate to it in non-food type ways.”

“What?” Anya asked.

“Scent of Anya is heart, Spike is security.” Crushing the three of them to him he continued, “Scent of Willow is home.”


TBC...