I think Cordy has had some of the best lines in Buffy and Angel over the years. Always very funny and witty and above all things... truthful! Sometimes I think I'm a bit like her..."I think it, I say it, it's my way!". So true! Anyway here's a selection of my favourite Cordelia-isms!
CORDELIA: God! What is your childhood trauma?!
BUFFY: Have you guys seen Willow? Did she come by here?
CORDELIA: Why? Do you need to attack her with the stick? Jeez! Excuse me, I have to call *everyone* I have *ever* met, right now.
CORDELIA: Ooo! Hello, salty goodness! Pick up the phone, call 911. That boy is gonna need some serious oxygen after I'm through with him.
CORDELIA: Whatever is causing the Joan Collins 'tude, deal with it. Embrace the pain, spank your inner moppet, whatever, but get over it. 'Cause pretty soon you're not even gonna have the loser friends you've got now.
CORDELIA: Groping in a broom closet isn't dating. You don't call it a date until the guy spends money.
CORDELIA: Tact is just not saying true stuff. I'll pass.
CORDELIA: I hear you, you redneck moron. You got a dress that goes with that hat?
Lyle: I'm gonna...
CORDELIA: Rip out my innards, play with my eyeballs, boil my brain and eat it for brunch? Listen up, needle-brain. Buffy and I have taken out four of your cronies, not to mention your girlfriend.
Lyle: WIFE!
CORDELIA: Whatever. The point is, I haven't even broken a sweat. See, in the end, Buffy's just the runner-up. *I'm* the
Queen. You get me mad, what do you think I'm gonna do to you?
CORDELIA: I came over here to tell Buffy to stop this craziness and found you all unconscious... again. How many times have you been knocked out, anyway? I swear, one of these times, you're gonna wake up in a coma.
CORDELIA: You don't know who he is, do you? Oh, boy! You're about to get your ass kicked!
CORDELIA: I’m not a sniveling whiny little Cry-Buffy. I’m the nastiest girl in Sunnydale history. I take crap from no one.
CORDELIA: Okay, am I wrong in thinking that a *Please* and *Thank you* is generally considered good form when requesting a dismemberment?
CORDELIA: I think it, I say it. That's my way.
CORDELIA: I've rejected you way before now! So, you're half demon. Big whoop! I can't believe you'd think I'd care about that. I mean, I work for a vampire! Hello?
CORDELIA: Kind of rude coming into a vampire’s place of business with one of those things, don’t you think? Could be misinterpreted?
CORDELIA: You were human... did you never party?!
CORDELIA: Wow. Groveling isn't just a way of life for you, it's an art.
CORDELIA: Wesley, you don't change a guy like that. In fact, generally speaking, you don't change a guy. What you see is what you get. Scratch the surface and what do you find? More surface.
CORDELIA: That man will do anything to save a life.
CORDELIA: Right. This is Angel. "Oh, no. I can't do anything fun tonight. I have to count my past sins, then alphabetize them. Oh, by the way, I'm thinking of snapping on Friday." You know, I love Angel and everything, but right now, I'm so glad he's headed the other way.
CORDELIA: Uh huh, time to traipse off to your shallow, soul-sucking Hollywood party?
WESLEY: Premiere, actually. And uh, I happen to have an extra ticket ...
CORDELIA: Who does shallow better than me?
CORDELIA: Darla. It's all about Darla. One thing you can say about Angel at least he's consistent. It's always some little blonde driving him over the edge.
CORDELIA: Earth to retards: you have an obsession you pretty much squeeze it into your schedule, no matter what!
CORDELIA: Oh. Harmony is a vampire? - That's why she - oh, my god, I'm so embarrassed! All this time I thought she was a great big lesbo! - Oh, yeah? Really? - Well, that's great! Good for you.