DISCLAIMER: I don’t own them, and I never will!
SPOILERS: The Girl In Question (Angel 5x20)
SUMMARY: Angel’s in Rome to save Buffy, but he’s too late.
PAIRINGS: B/A
DISTRIBUTION: If you have anything of mine, then feel free, if not please ask.
RATING: PG
FEEDBACK: Yes Please I’d love some Akay_81@msn.com
DEDICATION: To Lea, Kristian, Torey and Sobad, you guys are truly wonderful friends!
AN: WARNING!!! Character Death, So yeah major angst here!

I was the slayer, I was strong once upon a time, I had my friends my family, my Angel. I had it all, but things change, people grow. And now I’m fading into nothing.

I can feel it already, and I know I’ve gone too far this time, I know that I’m not going to make it through the night.

Swaying to the beat, I try to lose myself in the music. I try to lose myself in just about anything these days, but I’ve found that only one thing works and tonight I’ve taken too much.

**********

“No, no. We-we're looking for a friend of ours.” Angel said, he hated places like this the music and the crowd, he hated being around so many people, it wasn’t that he wasn’t a people person, but he always pictured his reunion with Buffy to be a little more romantic than this.

“She's in trouble. This ponce called The Immortal is-” Spike didn’t even get a chance to get it out.

“Ah, si. Si. The Immortal's new ragazza. They come, while ago.” She said a flirtatious smile on her lips as she took in the sight in front of her, two great looking young men. Unfortunately they were here looking for the girl that had all the roman girls cursing her name.

“There.” She said her hand stretched out pointing past the pair at a young blonde dancing among the crowd. Dancing didn’t really describe it; Angel couldn’t stand to see her moving like that for someone else. But as angry as it made him the moment he saw her it felt like everything switched to slow motion and things became hazy, everything but Buffy.

“Your friend maybe go a little wild, too, si?” The girl behind the bar said, pulling Angel out of the little world he’d fallen into the moment he laid eyes on her after nearly a year. Turning to face Spike he brought his attention back to the matter at hand.

Unfortunately he wasn’t here to sweep her off her feet, he was here to save her, he was here to see her and let her light shine on his life before he’d have to leave, a broken man.

Spike and Angel stood there arguing over who got to go first, all the while forgetting that there was another reason they were in Rome, they had business to take care of, and sometimes business had to come before the one you love. They had a head in a bag they were responsible for, and as much as they didn’t want to they had to leave as the bag was now missing.

**********

I knew all along that he was following me, and of course I knew that it was all Angel’s doing. I know him all too well, that night in the graveyard when I told him that maybe someday I’d be ready, something deep down told me that he was planning something like this.

In a way it was sweet, he had someone here keeping an eye on me when he couldn’t, but in a way it was so annoying and it made me so angry. I kinda took it out on the wrong person though. That guy, the one that was following me, he’s kinda in hospital now……… oops.

The funny thing is that even when he was following me, he might have seen and known certain things I was getting up to, but there were some that I managed to keep to myself….. like this.

And right now that’s starting to be my biggest regret, Angel must have known somehow that I couldn’t do it on my own; I guess that’s why he sent him. Angel must have wanted to save me from this, but now it’s too late, I don’t think anyone can.

So this is how it all ends for me, this is where this slayer gets off, no long and happy life for Buffy, no husband that works for the phone company, no kids with his nose and my eyes. No white picket fence, no dreams coming true for this girl.

I just wish for one thing, that I could see him, just once more. I wouldn’t say anything; I’d just look at him, and take him in one last time, before never seeing him again.

I wouldn’t have to tell him that I love him, that I always will, I’d just have to see him and leave here with his vision in my mind.

It’s starting now, I knew I took too much, but there’s something else, this feeling this tingling sensation shooting through me, or is that just the drug. No this is stronger than any other drug, this is all Angel.

Turning slowly I see him, talking to Spike, I got my wish, I got to see him once more before it’s all over. Standing here I smile as my tears fall, this is my goodbye, this is the end.

Everything’s spinning now; it feels like it’s never going to stop. Everything’s fading, I don’t want to go, why was I so stupid, I want to stay, I want to be cookies, ready for Angel. I change my mind, I change my wish, he needs to know I love him, please, please don’t take me now.

My legs, I can’t feel them, I can’t keep myself up, and so I fall crashing to the floor.

**********

Angel and Spike had just made it out the doors to the club when he paused, there was something telling Angel to go back inside.

“You go without me, there’s something I need to take care of.” Angel insisted, and Spike wanted nothing more than to put up a fight, but he knew that this once he should just let it be.

**********

Walking back inside the club he couldn’t see her, she was gone, he already knew that as he had thrown the dance floor one last glance when he walked out and hadn’t seen her.

So why was it that there was something inside telling him that his eyes were deceiving him. Scanning the club once more, he finally spotted her, lying helpless on the floor.

Rushing over to her, he knelt down picking her up and holding her in his arms.

“Buffy?” he chocked gently brushing her golden mane away from her face, hoping she was okay.

Her eyes slowly fluttered open, as she lay in his strong embrace gazing into his sad brown eyes.

“I wished for the wrong thing Angel.” She whispered, hoping she could stay long enough to tell him what she needed.

“Buffy what happened? Tell me baby, I’ll fix it, just tell me.” He begged, somehow he knew, he knew it was too late, he was too late.

She smiled, her hand slowly reaching up and her fingers lightly brushed his cheek. “If I could make that wish again, I’d wish for you, I’d wish for us, for cookies.”

“Buffy….” He mumbled trying to stop the tears but they seemed to have a will of their own.

“I love you Angel.” She said her hand falling back down beside her.

“I love you too.” He said clutching tightly and pulling her closer, thinking that if he just held on then she could to.

She smiled, that was all she wanted, that was all she needed to hear, closing her eyes, her body gave up fighting the drugs in her system.

In the middle of a crowded club in Rome, Angel sobbed holding his love for the last time. It was finally time, Buffy was finally ready for him, but he was too late, so she died waiting.

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