Where Were You?

by Alwyas Luv

Rating: You can watch the show, you can read this.
Authors note: I heard this song and it not only screamed B/A, it stomped on my foot, and shoved it's self in my face. Also **???** means song lyrics
Disclaimer: Don't own the Angel or BTVS characters, they belong to Joss Whedon, Fox, the WB, etc. The song Belongs to Clay Walker.


It's been five years. Five long years since he left me. Everyday I feel as though a little piece of my soul dies. Riley was little consolation. He helped fill the void just a little, for a while, but I'll never be the same girl I was in high school.

I still dream of him. He's in my dreams every night. And every morning I wake up hoping to find him there. It's not as bad now. Every night after he left, he was there in my mind. And I woke up, many mornings, calling out his name. Willow was really worried for a while. I never went out anywhere. I wouldn't even come out of my shell, I patroled, went to classes, and slept. It wasn't the healthiest of lifestyles.

**I used to wake up nights
Callin' out your name
Then cry myself back to sleep
Knowing I'd only dreamed
I stayed inside for days
Trapped within my mind
Wonderin' where you had gone
Convinced I could not go on**

One day, though, just after the end of my second last year. Not long ago. I was sitting in my room, back at my moms' house, not thinking of him for once. And suddenly, I felt him. It was the middle of the day, so I dismissed it, my mind playing tricks on me. After a few minutes, I had almost forgotten about it. ALMOST. Then there was a knock on the door. Since mom wasn't home, I had to go down and answer it. Walking towards the door, I was sure I could feel him, but I ignored the feeling, didn't want to be disappointed. I opened the door, to see him. Angel, my soulmate.

**Now just when I started feeling
The hands of time start healing
You're here at my door
Saying your new dreams
Have lead you back to me**

Standing there, bathed in sun, grinning from ear to ear. Seeing, what I only imagined before, was…a little overwhelming. So in true gracious, elegant Buffy fashion, I fainted. Luckily he caught me before I could hit the ground. I woke a few minutes later, no less confused.

"Why? What? How? What? How?" Eloquent,as only I can be.

"I'm human Buffy."

"Since when? How? Why?"

"It was my redemption, a gift from the powers that be"

"When?"

"This morning"

Regaining my train of thought I realized what was going on. "So why are you back? Why now?"

"To be with you." he answered, looking slightly hurt.

"To be with me?"

"Yes. If you'll have me. I want to protect you again. Keep you safe. That is if you want me back"

" Where were you when I fought all the demons, one who almost killed me? When my world was spinning out of control and I had nothing to hold on to? Why weren't you here when I needed you most?"

**Where were you
When I was going crazy
Where were you
Did you know what your leavin'
Put me through
You were feeling lost, last thing I knew
Went of to find yourself
Where were you**

"I had to go, Buffy. Back then…if I had stayed, we wouldn't have this chance now."

"Who says we have a chance? How do you know? How can you come back here, NOW, after five long years, and expect me to accept you back into my life with open arms? Five years ago, you walked out of my life, you turned and walked into the dark night, without so much as a good-bye, on one of the hardest nights of my life. And I didn't hear from you for all those years."

"I-"

"The things I felt, when you left. I'll never forget that night."

"I'm so sorry."

"But I also can't forget everything I feel for you. You've had such an impact on my life, even after you left. I can't turn my back on all I feel for you. We can try. You still need to earn back a lot of trust. It's not gonna be easy, but If you're willing to try this then, I guess I am to. I can't forget the past, but I can try to put it behind me."

"Thank you. I love you, so much."

"I- I love you too."

They kissed. A soft gentle kiss, one of never forgotten feelings of love.

**I can't pretend I'm strong
Or act Like I don't care
But I won't betray my heart
Now that we've come this far**

"Stay here." I say, getting up off of the couch and walking to the still open front door. And as I closed and lock the door, I also close a door, and enter a new part of my life, hopefully leaving the past in the past. I had no choice when he left. But I won't let him get away this time.

**I let you go cause I had to
I'll close this door cause I have to
This tunnel has a light
It's not that far away
It's brighter everyday**

As I open this new chapter of my life, a chapter with Angel, I know I'll never truly forget the past, but for our sake, I'll try to. I'll leave it where it belongs. A smile lights my face as I walk back, and sit next to my Angel.

We spend the next hours, catching up, and rebuilding old bonds. It's a long road ahead, but we'll get there, together.

**Where were you
When I was going crazy
Where were you
Did you know what your leavin'
Put me through
You were feeling lost, last thing I knew
Went of to find yourself
Where were you**

The End

Send feedback to Always Luv

Back to the Fanfiction Archive