DISCLAIMER: Wow, are they SO not mine. If they were, stories like this would hardly be necessary, because we'd be seeing mush every week!
TIMELINE: In the future...
SPOILERS: None
SYNOPSIS: Angel faces his most difficult challenge yet.
DISTRIBUTION: All my beloved current archivers, please feel free. Everybody else, just ask. I'll say yes. :)
FEEDBACK: Oh, come on... do you really have to ask?
RATING: G

"I can't."

"Angel, you can."

"No. No. There's no way."

Wesley frowned at his dearest friend -- the man who had become as close as a brother, over the years. After all that Angel had lived through, all that he had braved to get to this moment, to see this strong man so terrified that he fairly quaked with it was almost too much to bear.

He put a hand firmly on each of Angel's shoulders, and looked straight into his eyes. "Listen to me. You have survived horrors beyond imagining. You've survived Hell. You've faced Armageddon. You have battled the monster that lived in your body. Angel... this is what it has all led to. This is what you've been waiting for... preparing for. You can do this."

Angel held his friend's gaze. Never before, in 260 years of life, had he felt the depth of mind-numbing fear that froze the blood in his veins at this moment. "Wesley, all of that was a game of checkers compared to this." He yanked out of the man's gasp and paced the small anteroom where they waited for the ritual to begin. "You don't understand. I'm going out there, completely unarmed, and every single being in that room will be judging me. Deciding once and for all if everything I've done is worthy of the reward." He spun, his eyes wild. "What if I'm found lacking? What if they all rise against me? What if the things I've done can't be forgiven?"

"Angel, stop this!" Wesley barked, "You, my friend, are a warrior of legend! The Powers That Be have blessed you time and time again. You have earned the right to stand before this gathering!" He let his voice drop, and approached his terrified friend once more. "And I will be standing beside you, whatever happens. As will the others. We will face this together."

Angel's gaze rose slowly, and his face lit with a smile. "My army."

Wesley returned the smile. "Yes, your army. All of us have agreed to stand with you in this, Angel. As we have always stood with you. Do you truly think that we would do so, if we thought you unworthy? Especially Buffy. She has as much to fear from this as you do, no?"

His smile grew in spite of himself. "Yes. She does."

"And yet, hasn't she agreed to stand beside you, at your left hand, before the Powers That Be, and all those gathered here?"

Angel nodded.

Wesley gave him a reassuring pat on the back. "My brother... I am proud of you beyond words. And I have the utmost confidence that you will see this task through with the same grace and valor as you have any other."

Angel took a deep breath, and let it out slowly. "Thank you. I know you're right. Just... I'd feel a lot better if I was allowed to carry a sword."

His friend chuckled. "Ah, but... this is a trial of the heart, yes? No arms are necessary beyond what is inside of you."

The door to the chamber swung open, and Angel's throat closed to hear the music beginning, and the face of the priest appearing at the door. "Angel, it's time," he said, and disappeared once more.

Angel spun to his second. "I can't!" he yelped, "I can't do it! What if I faint? What if I forget the words?" He grabbed Wesley's arms in a desperate clutch. "What if I have a heart attack and drop dead???"

Wesley dislodged his hands, put an arm around the shaking man's shoulders, and led him toward the door. "I'm fairly certain none of those things will happen."

The room was filled to capacity, and all eyes to toward Wesley and Angel as they approached the altar, where Spike and Gunn already waited. The blonde gave Angel his best imitation of a reassuring smile, but it appeared as his trademark smart-ass smirk, instead. Gunn pounded him on the back as he and Wesley took their places.

"You ready for this, man?" the younger man asked with a grin.

Angel immediately broke into a sweat. "No," he squeaked in reply.

The music changed, beginning to swell, and the men turned to the back of the room to watch the women's arrival. They entered according to the letter of the ancient ritual, first Cordelia, then Willow, then Dawn, and finally...

Angel's breath caught in his throat. Buffy was a vision of pure beauty, walking tall and proud toward them, like a living promise. Their eyes met, and Angel's newborn heartbeat tripled. After a breathless eternity watching her come, she stepped up beside him, giving him a smile full of so much love, so much pride, so much power and certainty, all of his fears were wiped away in an instant.

"Are you okay?" she whispered, giving his hand a warm squeeze.

His eyes filled, blurring the vision, and he returned the squeeze. Utterly unable to speak, he simply nodded.

"I'm right here," she reassured him, "We're ready for this."

Yes. Ready. Ten years had all been leading to this single moment. The fulfillment of every sweet dream he'd ever had.

The priest approached, and Angel's family all turned to face him.

Angel took another deep, cleansing breath, and clutching Buffy's small hand for dear life, gave his full attention to what was about to happen. The pinnacle of his existence. His ultimate reward. The final stand.

The priest's expression was somber as he began the litany.

"Dearly beloved, we are gathered here to day in the sight of God and this company, to witness the union of this man and this woman in Holy Matrimony..."

Send feedback to Ducks

Back to the Fanfiction Archive