Rating : PG
Disclaimer: Joss owns all, yadda, yadda, yadda.
notes: I was listening to Sarah and feeling sad, hence my story
Distribution: Anyone who wants it can have it, just please tell me first :)

Buffy wandered through the streets of Sunnydale, another victory, another loss, it all didn't seem to matter anymore, she should have been happy, but an emptiness filled her heart, an emptiness that Riley had tried to mend, but couldn't heal. Deep down Buffy knew what she needed, but she also knew that she could never have it again, and it pained her.

Her wandering had led her to an apartment, his apartment, only the red bedclothes remained in the empty space. Buffy slid under the covers and held herself close, with every movement she could catch the scent of him, it was weak and lingering, but she could still breathe it in. She knew it was wrong for her to be here, but a part of her didn't care,they both may have been doing what they had to do, but it wasn't enough, she needed something more.

What ravages of spirit
conjured this temptuous rage
created you a monster
broken by the rules of love
and fate has lead you through it
you do what you have to do
and fate has led you through it
you do what you have to do ...\\

Angel sat in a chair, his only company was the darkness,he sat there and thought of her, he moved over to his bureau and opened a drawer up, he pulled out a tan shirt, her shirt, he held it close,her scent was all over it, he sat back and wallowed in the past. Everything he did now, all the lives he had saved, all the souls he had mended, he still couldn't save her heart, or his. He put the shirt back and turned the lights on, he was doing what he had to do, even if itmeant eternal loneliness, he sighed and held his head in his hands.

And I have the sense to recognize that
I don't know how to let you go
every moment marked
with apparitions of your soul
I'm ever swiftly moving
trying to escape this desire
the yearning to be near you
I do what I have to do
the yearning to be near you
I do what I have to do
but I have the sense to recognize
that I don't know how
to let you go\\

Buffy gathered herself together and got up, she took one last look at the bed and turned away, a tear escaped and rolled down her cheek. She started to wander again, wander through the life she was living, he was burned in her memory, she couldn't let him go. Buffy walked home, she turned the light off and drifted, she waited for him as she always would, her dreams an escape.

I don't know how
to let you go
a glowing ember
burning hot
burning slow
deep within I'm shaken by the violence
of existing for only you\\

Angel walked out of the room, if he could only see her again, touch her again, feel her soft skin, he would be whole, and that was why he couldn't be with her. It ached so badly inside, the sun was about to rise, he wandered into his room and closed his eyes, there he could be with her, even if it wasn't real, he needed it, or he would be lost.

I know I can't be with you
I do what I have to do
I know I can't be with you
I do what I have to do
and I have sense to recognize but
I don't know how to let you go
I don't know how to let you go
I don't know how to let you go\

The sun was ablaze, it cast it's light across the fields and on the only two who remained there. She stood there her eyes deadset on his, he stared back into hers, they both walked briskly, smiles on their faces until they met. He whisked her into his arms, laughter escaping their mouths. Their mouths met in a passionate embrace, one that seemed to last forever, as their love would.

"I'll love you always, if only there were some wa-." She started.

"Shh, don't think of that now, this is all we have." He interrupted as he kissed her. "I know." She said sullenly, but attempted a smile. "Let's enjoy it while it lasts." She added as everything started to fade out.

Angel woke up and sighed, Buffy woke up and sighed, they faced another empty night, but they were doing what they had to do.

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