DISCLAIMER: Nothing and nobody are mine. They all belong to Joss.
I'm just borrowing them really quickly.
TIMELINE: After 'The Real Me' and 'Are You Now Or Have You Ever
Been...'.
SPOILERS: See above. Non-USA people trying to stay spoiler free for
season 5; go away, please.
SYNOPSIS: Buffy dreams of Angel. Um, again.
DISTRIBUTION: Ask if you want it (or take if you have the first one).
AUTHOR'S NOTES: You might want to read the first installment, if you
haven't already - it can be found at my site,
AUTHOR'S NOTES 2: 'Dream A Little Dream Of Me' is a song covered, I
think, by the Beautiful South. I don't know who did it first.
FEEDBACK: Please, yay or nay? ... and huge thanks to all who sent it for the first one, you're all wonderful.
RATING: PG
I walked quietly from the Sunnydale High library into my bedroom. Well, Dawn's bedroom. She was sleeping peacefully, despite the cool air that circulated through the open window. I headed purposefully over to the window and peered out.
I'm not sure why I wasn't surprised to see him sitting out there, a dark mass framed against the dim glow from the streetlamp. He was staring out at nothing I could see, but he must have felt me there because he turned and looked at me. His teeth flashed in a welcoming smile.
'Hi,' Angel said, 'I was waiting for you.'
'Sorry,' I said, throwing one leg over the ledge and nimbly climbing over to settle next to him on the tiles. 'New vamp infestation.'
'Big?' he said in concern, leaning back on his elbows, legs hanging over the edge. I copied his position, shifting to get comfortable. Where his whole calves were hanging over, only my feet did. I don't know why I always go for these men who tower above my head; probably some kind of subconscious desire to be looked after for once instead of having to do the looking after.
'No,' I said, answering his question, 'Well, not exactly small, but stupid.' I laughed softly, 'Very stupid.' A thought occured to me and I frowned, turning to face him, 'Do you know if Cordelia knows her friend Harmony's been vamped?'
He thought about it, 'I don't think so.' He looked at me, and there was a worry in his gaze, an affection for Cordelia that gave me a jealous twinge I really didn't care to examine deeply.
'Should I tell her?' he was going on.
'I don't think so,' I said slowly, 'We're trying to ... neutralise the problem.'
'Neutralise the problem?' he said in disbelief.
I caught myself. God, I was slipping into Riley terminology.
'Spike's being kind of awkward,' I said, dismissing my blunder, 'He had this thing with her. Though they didn't exactly seem close at the time,' I observed idly.
'Spike,' Angel repeated.
'Is there an echo out here?' I teased. 'Yes, Spike. Still one hundred percent unable to make with the violence.'
'Deadened and hating it,' Angel quipped.
'Yeah, well, they grabbed Dawn, which is always good for a wiggins,' I said, unable to find any humour there. She's annoying, yeah, and she's a weakness, sure, but it's my duty to protect her. Well, and everyone else; but she's blood.
'Right,' Angel said slowly, tipping his head back and closing his eyes.
'Are you okay?' I asked, suddenly forgetting Dawn with concern for my dozy lover. Um, former.
'What? Oh, yeah,' he said. 'Just tired.' He gave me another fleeting grin, 'I'm moving house.'
'Suburban,' I said.
'An abandoned hotel that was infested with a parasitical demon for over fifty years,' he corrected, very seriously. I shot a look at him from under my lashes to check if he was joking.
'At least you'll have a lot of room,' I said.
'And a lot to do,' he said, sighing, 'Sixty-eight rooms, and not one that doesn't need decorating.'
'You are suburban,' I said in amazement, 'Is that what you did this week? Invested in real estate?'
'No,' he said, 'I had to get the demon out first.'
'Any trouble?' I said.
'No,' he said, offering a bittersweet smile to no-one in particular, 'Just exorcised some ghosts.'
'Okay, I'm confused,' I said, confused. 'Was it a demon, or was it ghosts?'
'Their demon. My ghosts,' he replied, then seemed to consider the matter closed.
That's cryptic. That's annoying.
'Well, it just so happens I may have spent some time doing something similar.'
'Ghosts?' he asked, looking at me.
'Real estate,' I shot back, 'I think Giles is thinking about buying the magic shop.'
'He wants to think carefully, then,' Angel said, 'There seemed to have been a new owner there every time I went in.'
'I'll get Willow to check for curses,' I joked, but I made a mental note to remember it for the real world.
'So he may be back in gainful employ twice over,' I said.
'What?' he said.
'I asked him to be my Watcher again,' I told him, 'Officially.'
'What brought that on?' he asked.
'Dracula,' I said. 'I didn't know how to deal with him, and it scared me that I ...'
I stopped instantly when I felt cool fingers on my throat, softly caressing the spot on my neck where vampire fangs have bitten twice. I knew what Angel was feeling, apart from the rapid pulse and rush of blood; the scar that had become familiar to me over the last year, his own bite mark.
'I said it'd heal,' he remarked softly.
'You did,' I said, remembering the first dream I'd shared with him, or part of him.
There was a sudden chill wind and I shivered.
Angel noticed. 'Cold?'
'Yeah,' I said.
'You're not, you know,' he said, amused, 'This is a dream.'
'My dream,' I said, half-questioning. I didn't like to be reminded that soon I'd wake up, and be two hours away from him again. Being with him, chatting, sharing the days' inanities that no-one else would care about ... it's familiar. It's right.
Riley and I don't talk much.
'Maybe yours,' he said, 'Maybe ours.'
'Well, then,' I said, 'In my dream, you give me your coat when I'm cold.'
He laughed, a rich sound I love but long ago became resigned to hearing infrequently, and sat up, pulling off his duster and draping it around my shoulders. I pulled it around myself, then hung onto his arm when he went to move away again. I interlaced my fingers firmly with his, inching over to cuddle up against his side. His easy embrace gave me far more warmth than the jacket could.
We sat in comfortable silence. There weren't any stars out, but the sky was -
'There could be stars,' he said from nowhere.
'How did you know I was thinking that?' I said, shocked and kind of impressed.
'You were looking at the sky, and ... I know how you like your nights,' he teased.
He does know. He should, when we shared so many of them.
'So how do I get stars, then?' I said.
'Think them there, and they will be,' he said simply.
I gazed up at the dark sky, willing tiny pinpricks of light to appear.
It was a complete anti-climax when none did.
'That worked well,' I said.
'You're pushing too hard,' he said soothingly, 'Just imagine them there, like they always are, remember them...'
His voice was deep and soft and my eyes closed. I rested my head on his shoulder and listened to him. He can have a very hypnotic voice, my Angel; I lost count of the number of times I fell asleep to his smooth tones whispering at my bedside.
'There!' he said, sounding pleased.
I opened my eyes, catching the faint glimmer of stars fading out.
'And I repeat, that worked well,' I said dryly.
'It'll come,' he promised, 'You just don't know what to do yet.'
His words reminded me of something, and I felt a sharp deja-vu. Or maybe premonition.
'Common theme lately,' I mumured.
He didn't answer, but I knew he understood me because his arm tightened reassuringly around my shoulders as I leant into him.
'Angel?' I ventured after a minute.
'Mm,' he replied comfortably.
I straightened up, away from his hold.
'Did you,' I said, stumbling, almost afraid to be answered, 'I mean, when you were here ... when you first came ... did you ever sense anything dark about me? Evil?'
He looked at me, his eyes glinting in the darkness.
'Dracula said, I didn't know about myself,' I explained haltingly, 'And before that ... I dreamt ...'
I dragged his arm back around me and burrowed into his chest. He stroked my hair, relaxing me slowly.
'I've never sensed anything demonic about you, Buffy,' he said, his voice a little muffled, and I knew he was telling the truth. 'You were ... you're my light.'
'There's so much I don't know,' I whispered, peering up at him, 'I need to understand.'
He gazed back down at me, 'Does it really matter what the source of your power is, Buffy? As long as you're using it for good?'
I looked at him, absorbing him, realising that this was why I'd confided in him the thoughts I didn't want to share with Giles, or Willow, or Xander. It was for this wisdom; for an understanding of what it was to be totally confused about who I was that they couldn't match.
Woah. I have a more complex subconscious than I thought.
'It took me a while to figure that out,' Angel told me, his expression serious. 'I still am. I still wonder about ... it all. But I assume,' he gave me a sweet half-smile, 'That as long as I'm doing good,' he shrugged, the smile becoming deprecating, 'I'm doing good.'
'Thank you,' I said sincerely.
'No problem,' he said.
'I still want to know,' I said.
'Then find out,' he told me, getting to his feet in one fluid motion, 'But try not to worry about it.'
I watched him climb easily into the window and jump lightly into the room. His eyes fell on the bed. He hesitated, then turned back to me, and I knew instinctively that what spoke now was little more than Angel's form, though what was in it wasn't threatening.
'Look after Dawn, Buffy, okay?'
'I will,' I said, a little surprised, and a little annoyed. She is my sister.
'Good,' he said, suddenly all Angel again as he leaned out of the window to kiss me softly on the forehead.
I looked at Dawn, and by the time I looked back over at the door, he was gone.
It's strange that I'd dream that; Angel hardly ever used the door.
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