SUMMARY: St. Patty's Day 2001 - it's a party. Better run and hide. "Why didn't you tell me you had such great property?" Wesley asked when they entered the mansion. "You've been here before," Angel said. "Yeah, but back then he was being all evil and trying to make Buffy let Angel die." Cordelia supplied. "Thank you for reminding us of that, Cordelia." Wesley said dryly. "Anytime." she smiled. "I think Spike is here," Angel said unhappily as he walked into the living room and saw his mansion. Sure, Buffy, Willow and Spike had moved in a few months ago, but it was starting to *look* like people lived there. The floor was still cement, but there were lots of throw rugs and colorful lights intermixed with all the dark things he'd had. The only thing Buffy hadn't changed at all was the leather furniture. Buffy left Willow, Anya and Tara to battle getting the little punch cups to hook on the bowl and gave her boyfriend a hug. "I'm so glad you're here! Happy St. Patrick's Day! Do you wish that? 'Cause this is my first St.--" there was a loud crash in the kitchen and the sound of dishes breaking made Buffy's ears redden. "SPIKE!" she yelled. "It was just one plate that time," he yelled back. She shook her head. "Okay, so you guys can toss your coats in the coat room, which you just came from, and grab a seat or dance or whatever. Spike's the DJ, which is why we're listenin' to this crap--" "Don't you be knockin' Gaelic Storm!" he said as he brought in two plates of nachos and set them on the large coffee table with some of the other food. "They had their music in Titanic." "Lucky for them." Riley came over and grabbed two nachos, handing one to Graham before digging in. "Great job on these, Buffy." "Spike made them." she said, pulling Angel away. "I still can't believe you dated that guy." he shook his head. "Dance with me," Buffy put her arms around Angel's neck. "Look, it was a year ago and it was before he realized he was gay. You can't blame him for finding out his true self, can you?" Before Angel could answer, Cordelia started giggling madly. Wesley and Xander were arm wrestling for a dance with her. "You guys have problems," Giles commented. "Angel, how good to see you." he said, trying to smile. "You don't really feel that way." he said, but he shook the Watcher's hand anyways. "You're right, I don't." Giles smiled for real this time. "Taking care of things in LA?" "As best I can." he shoved his hands in his pockets. "Okay, go dance with Anya or something." Buffy dismissed Giles and started dancing with Angel again. They were looking at each other in happy silence until Spike abruptly changed the music. "SPIKE!" half the party yelled. "They're Irish," he said defensively as the Sex Pistols filled the air. "They are not and you know it." Buffy laughed. "See what I have to contend with on a daily basis?" "I'll trade you Wesley for him." Angel suggested. "No thanks. Not that desperate." "Hey!" Wesley protested. He stopped fighting Xander to look at Buffy and the boy pressed his hand down, jumping up and down with glory. "Uh, Buffy," Willow nudged the dancing couple. "Isn't there supposed to be punch in the punch bowl?" "Yeah, lemon-lime spritzer with the green food coloring." "Well, I just tasted it, and it's beer." "SPIKE!" Buffy yelled again. "It's St. Patty's Day, Slayer." he replied as he looked for another disc. "You've gotta have green beer." "I thought the invitation said you had to come dressed." Graham looked extremely uncomfortable. "Why, who's not--SPIKE!" Buffy yelled for the hundredth time that night. "I didn't do anything this bloody time." he said as he loaded up the CD changer and began programming tracks in. "Anytime," Cordy said. "I'd like to get my dance with Nerd Boy here over with." "That's *my* drunk boyfriend you're talking about." Anya said defensively. "And I don't want you to forget it." "Don't worry," Cordy said, walking away. "Get dressed Spike, please." Willow said. "You're scaring Graham. He's not used to our parties." "He can bloody deal with it." he came out from behind the sound system wearing a pair of green boxers with glow-in-the-dark four-leaf clovers all over them. He had a "Kiss Me, I'm Irish" temporary tattoo over his unbeating heart. "I am not kissing you," she called as she walked back to Oz. "You know you will eventually, Red!" he yelled back. "I'm bored." Giles declared. "We could have a drinking contest." Angel suggested sarcastically. "No bloody way." Buffy said. Everyone stared at her and she shrugged. "I've been spending too much time around Spike." "Duly noted." Giles said. "What do you say, Angel? Think you can out drink an old man?" "I think you're the young one here, Giles." Angel smirked. "No one's outdrinking anyone without me." Xander said eagerly, sitting down between them at the table. "Me neither." Spike joined them. "Riley, you in?" Giles asked. "Graham? Wesley? Oz." "Pass," Riley said. "Booze and I don't mix." "I'm the designated driver," Graham added. He looked scared to death. "I'm in," Wesley joined them at the table. "Uh, Oz, is it? Care to make it a sixtet?" "No." he answered simply. The music changed to a happy Cranberries song and the drinking began. The girls, bored as Hell, decided to play a game. "We could play strip Twister," Anya said. "That would be fun." "It's only fun with Spike." Willow said. "'Cause he winds up all naked." "This I'd like to see." Cordy said eagerly. "Not gonna happen." Buffy said. "Jenga?" Willow got out the game and they began playing at the coffee table while eating. "Yes!" Anya declared a few minutes later. "I win. Again." "You cheat," Tara muttered. "I should get to do something." she looked around the room. "I could shave Spike's head--" "You wanna be bloody mutilated?" he asked her. "I dare you to try." she glared at him. "But I think I'll taunt....Riley." He looked up, drunk as Hell. "Huh?" "Stand up," she instructed. "Riley, let's go home." Graham came over and tried to lead him away but Riley slapped him. "Never turn away a lady's reque-quest for assissistenc." he said, trying to stand up straight. "I'm scared," Graham admitted. "Come sit over here," Willow patted the couch beside her. "You'll be safer at least." He scurried to the couch and Anya led Drunk Boy to the center of the living room. She kissed him and then quickly pulled down his pants, exposing him to the entire room. "I've smoked fatter joints than that!" Giles declared happily. "It's cute," Anya said with a shrug. "I see why all you did was cuddle, Buffy." Cordelia said seriously. "I'm an artist," Tara began. "Can I paint a smiley face on it? It won't sting." "I'm shocked," Xander stated between gulps of green beer. He was practically lying out on the table. "The guy's got huge feet." Angel and Spike were both so damned drunk by this point that they were laughing and pointing, telling each other they looked like that. "I told you God was punishing me," Buffy muttered to Willow. "Well, it's not that bad," she tried to be nice. "Maybe if we water it, it'll grow?" "Wanna shag?" Anya asked him laughingly. "It won't take long." "That's enough," Graham came over and picked Riley up, slinging him over his back. "We'll see you all guys next time they're sober. 'Night Buffy. Thanks for the party." They left and Wesley fell backwards in his chair, passing out. "One down," Buffy declared with a giggle. Spike fell next, cracking the glass on the table. "Two down," Buffy counted, rolling her eyes. "Here," Oz came out of the kitchen with a second punch bowl, this one full of-- "Coffee?" Willow asked. "It's Irish," Oz explained. "That makes sense." Tara dipped a mug in and began drinking it. "A pirate's life for me," Xander began singing, then he paused. "I don't know any of the other words." "No one does," Giles said seriously. "It's supposed to be that way," Angel added. "Where's Amy tonight?" Tara asked Willow. "In her cage upstairs." she smiled. "I got her the cutest little outfit, she's a Leprechaun." "I fear you." Anya said seriously. "I gotta get something." Xander stumbled out of the chair and went outside. No one bothered to follow him. "Hey," Graham re-entered, Riley still in his arms. "Did you know Xander's outside? His clothes are scattered all over the stairs and he's naked in Spike's barrel yelling "Help me. Help me, my dear." he came on to Riley twice. "What are you guys still doing here?" Buffy questioned. Graham plopped Riley down and grabbed a mug of the coffee. "We were....playing and Fish Boy here had to hurl. So I'm back. And I'm getting plastered." "YES!" Angel yelled when Giles fell over onto the table. "I win." "Congratulations." Buffy said sarcastically. "You can puke for four days and force Spike into replacing the dishes he broke." Hearing his name, Spike got up and swore at her. Then he joined them in the living room and took a sip of the coffee. "You guys throw a good party," he declared. "Oh, Buffy, I need you." Riley said suddenly. He grabbed Spike's hands and kissed him. "I want to profess my love to you here and now." "Bloody Hell!" Spike jerked away. "Get your fish lips off of me. God! I've gotta go move into a vat of disinfectant." he stormed off, cussing all the way. "Hey," Anya pointed. "Isn't that a Leprechaun?" Angel looked. "Yeah. That's Darrien." "You know him?" Buffy asked. Angel nodded. "He dated my sister once. Strapping young fellow." "Okay," Spike came out completely naked this time, causing Graham to whimper with jealousy, Anya to pass out and Buffy to throw up. "Who's gonna kiss me?" "I will," Cordy jumped up and kissed him. Then she looked at him. "Why'd I kiss you?" "So I could cast a spell." he replied. "It calls for the kiss of an evil Witch, so I figured any of you would do." "You're dust!" Buffy pulled a stake out of the couch cushions and took off after him, chasing Spike all around the house and outside. They wound up knocking down the barrel with Xander in it, and the three of them wound up having a pretty good night. Send feedback to Isa Back to the Fanfiction Archive
SPOILER: Not really any specifics, but Riley, Graham, Tara and Wussley are all here
DISTRIBUTION: Sandee, of course - My site - - Crystal and Butterfly if they want it - A Soul's Redemption - Anyone else - sure, just email me & lmk where it's going - I like seeing my name in print =)
RATING: TV-14
DISCLAIMER: Characters belong to Poophead Joss. I didn't come up with that name for him, but it's *so* true.If this is really bad or insane or whatever, blame BERN it's her challenge.And sorry Chica. I love you but I couldn't put Riley with Buffy. He's with Wesley though