Part 11

Angel woke up the next morning by a loud knock on Buffy's apartment door. He looked at the still sleeping slayer by his side and left the bed as careful as he could not to awake her. She had been so upset and frightened the day before and after Angel had managed to bring her home in the evening she had fallen into a deep exhausted sleep.

He tapped to the door and was surprised to see Wesley standing there. After showing him in and putting cups of hot coffee in front of them he asked:

"It is nice to see you, Wesley, but what are you doing here and that early?"

"Angel, I just had to come. I think I have an idea about you being human."

He had Angel's full attention when he continued "You remember the prophecy you found?"

Angel nodded "Yes, about the souled vampire becoming human."

"The very same. It was said that this would be a reward for you after fighting the evil. So I am just guessing now, but maybe you got that reward. I just cannot believe there could be a poison, a herb or whatever to revive a vampire back into a human being. If this would be so, there would be more of that kind."

"You really believe that?"

"I do. This would also explain the lack of guilt in your new attitude. You have changed, Angel. I mean you still look like Angel, but your eyes have changed, your body language has changed also. This has to be a result that reward."

Angel closed his eyes for a moment and then looked to his friend again

"We have to know that for certain, Wesley. I have to go and ask the Oracles, they should know."

Wesley nodded "You are right."

"Doyle is gone to LA. He has not phoned so far. I really hope he is alright. When he left yesterday he said he would probably back yesterday night - but he never came. However, I am going to LA, now. I have to see the Oracles." He stood up to head for the bathroom, but turned in the doorway

"Wesley, would you do me a favour, please. Buffy is still asleep, she was completely exhausted yesterday ... the fight with her mom ... and Riley ... that was too much for her. Could you stay and wait until she is awake and explain her where I am. Tell her I am not looking for trouble or whatever, I just have to know..."

"Of course, Angel. I am staying. And ... I understand."

*******

Buffy awoke slowly, she had the feeling she had slept for days but felt still tired. She turned to reach out for Angel only to see he was gone. She sat up, rubbed her eyes and walked to the living room to look for Angel only to find Wesley sitting there, sipping on a cup of coffee.

"Wesley," she said completely confused: "What are you doing here?"

He coughed slightly and looked at her:

"Angel asked me to stay and wait for you."

"Angel? Where is he?" She was fully awake by now and could feel the tension grow in her body, her guts told her something was not right.

"He is gone to LA."

"LA?" Buffy could feel her heart beating quickly in her chest and the fear creeping inside of her. "Wesley, what the hell is he doing in LA?"

"He went to see the Oracles."

"The ... oh, the ones who turned ... what is he going to do. He is not going to turn back time, is he?"

"No, Buffy. Please calm down. Many years ago, about a year after he left Sunnydale we found a prophecy that told about the souled vampire would become human as a reward. I was just guessing the fact Angel being human would be a result of that and had nothing to do with science."

"Oh," was all Buffy could say.

"Angel asked me to tell you he was only going to see the Oracles, you should not worry about it. He will be back tonight."

"You said you found the prophecy a year after he left Sunnydale."

"Around that. Actually Angel found it but I translated it. First we thought it was talking about death. Angel did not care, he only shrugged and left. Later on I found the real meaning of Shansu, it means life."

"Shan ... what?"

"Shansu."

Buffy nodded:

"Thanks for the explanation. I think I am going to take a shower now."

Wesley rose from the couch and looked at her "I see. That means I am leaving now. Don't worry to much, Buffy. Angel can care for himself."

"Yeah. We saw that, that's why he was captured in the first place."

*******

When Angel reached LA he headed for Angel Investigations first. He was astonished to see the office still looking the same and to find the door open. When he entered the building he found Doyle sitting in his former office with the phone in his hand. When the half-demon saw Angel he smiled and pointed him to sit down.

"Okay, that's the information I needed. Thanks Jack and bye. Be careful."

After finishing his phone-call he looked at Angel:

"Hey man, what are you doing here?"

Angel explained him the reason for coming to LA. Doyle nodded:

"Wesley is a smart guy, Angel. Good idea to see the Oracles, they would have all the answers."

"I hope so. What about you. Did you find anthing?"

"Yeah, I did. Very interesting. I met a Bracken demon who was in the lab with you. He actually remembered you. It seems he was treated the same way, he also remembered injections, but he did not loose his memory. Seems the drugs only have this effect in vampires. He also remembered the doctor you described. But the guy seems to have disappeard from the planet."

"Does not really help."

"Just wait. There is more. He also remembered some of the people working in the lab, he did not remember that Riley-guy."

"That does not say anything, Doyle."

"I know. However, the phone call I just recieved was Jack, he is a half-Bracken like me. His father was captured and killed there. He also told me they used to capture humans as well."

"As I remembered."

"Yeah, but Jack could also tell me why. They ... it is hard to believe ... but they wanted to breed half-demons to study them."

Angel's eyes widened

"What?"

"They tried to breed..."

"I heard that. I just cannot belive it."

"They implanted chips in the human heads to make them feel for demons and get them to mate with them."

"God, that sounds like a very bad horror movie."

"It does. Still it does not explain why they did that."

"However, Doyle. It is sick, this is so sick. I do not want to hear why they did it, there is no explanation or excuse for a thing like that."

Angel stood up and paced the office, he could not sit anymore. It made him feel nauseous.

"Jack also told me that three men were searching LA for the demons that escaped from the lab. Angel, man, you should really go and see the Oracles now and leave LA as soon as possible. It is not safe here."

Angel looked at him again "You are right. I promised Buffy to be back tonight. You should go back to Sunnydale, Doyle and please call Cordelia, she is very worried because you did not call yesterday."

"Oh, Delia. Of course I call her right now."

*******

When Angel came back to the office he was feeling better. The Oracles had affirmed him that Wesley had been right about his reward. This at least was giving a certain comfort. He would not have liked the idea some experiment could have caused his transformation, because he feared it could be done the other way round as well. And he had no wish to become a vampire again. The Oracles informed him also about the fact that he had kept his vampire strength and the advanced healing, but he had already guessed that.

The office was empty, Angel found a note from Doyle only saying 'on my way back to Sunnydale, see you soon'.

When Angel turned to leave himself he heard footsteps outside the door which was opened and allowed Kate to step in. Angel looked at her saw her eyes widen and a loud gasp escaped her mouth:

"A... A... Angel." Her face was pale.

"Kate," Angel only said.

"You are ... alive."

"Yes, obviously. It is a long story, Kate. You look good."

"Angel." She said again, stepped closer and embraced him in a tight hug: "I cannot believe you are really here. It is so good to see you."

She stepped back again and Angel could see a tear running down her cheek. He smiled:

"Sorry for the shock."

"It is okay. I came to see Doyle, he called me this morning for information. I wanted to call him but then decided to drop in."

"Doyle went back to Sunnydale. Cordelia is there."

Angel quickly decided that he would not tell the whole story to Kate. He was not sure how much she was able to deal with.

"I see. Will you talk to him?"

When Angel nodded she went on:

"He wanted information about Dr. Hartley. It seems he was a professor at Yale for a time. They dismissed him because of unethical studies, but I could not find anymore information what that exactly meant. He was then for some time connected with a Dr. Walsh who was a psych professor at UC Sunnydale and had been killed in an accident."

Angel's head shot up "Did you say Dr. Walsh?" Riley, his mind told him, this is where Riley fits in.

"Yes. I wanted to get further information about Dr. Walsh but that is top-secret and I could not get it without the password - sorry."

"It's okay, Kate. The informations you have are very helpful."

Kate hesitated and then said "I am sorry, but I am in a hurry, Angel. A case. So, will you be around?"

"I will."

"Then we might see each other sometime?"

"I hope so, and thank you."

Kate nodded, took a last long look of Angel and then left.

Angel took the keys of Oz's car he had borrowed, left the office and headed for Sunnydale.

******

On his way back his mind was racing. Dr. Walsh, Riley... he desperately tried to remember if he had seen Riley somewhere in the cellar. He still could not believe he had been there for five years, it seemed like some weeks when he thought back. But then he had been unconscious most of the time and in this state time was racing. The Oracles had told him, they had rewarded him with his humanity four years ago. Four years ago, he thought. Maybe that was the reason they kept him prisoner, maybe they gave themselves credit for transforming him into a human. A credit they might not have been able to understand. He shuddered. They were trying to create half-demons, breeding with humans ... this was just to weird. He had seen a lot of things in his long life but that was just beyond disgust. Passing the 'welcome to Sunnydale' sign Angel pulled up to Giles' apartment as he guessed the gang would be there still researching or listening to Doyle's informations. He parked the car and rang the bell. Only seconds later the door was wrenched open and Buffy flew in his arms:

"Angel. You are back."

He hold her tight and kissed the top of her head:

"I promised to be back."

She looked up "You did. And I am glad you kept your promise, I was so worried."

He kissed her on the tip of her nose

"There was no reason to do so. I just wanted to see the Oracles."

"And?"

He smiled "What about letting me in and explain for all."

She took his hand and pulled him into the living room where everyone was present with the addition of a small red-haired girl, quietly sleeping in Oz's lap. It was easy to guess she was Willow's and Oz's daughter.

Doyle turned to face Angel "Hey, you are back. I filled them in."

Angel nodded "That's good. Wesley, I went to see the Oracles. You were right, the Powers That Be gave me my humanity as a reward. It happened four years ago."

Nobody really seemed surprised, Wesley had obviously shared his thoughts with all. Giles said "It is good to know for certain though Wesley was guessing this for quite some time."

"Yes, it is good to know."

Angel looked around and went on "When I was about to leave the office Kate dropped in. She was searching for you Doyle."

He then told them about Kate's news, never letting go of Buffy's hand as he could feel tension and anger building up inside of her. When he was finished, Cordelia was the first to speak:

"This is all to much. I mean we had some pretty weird cases, vampires, demons and I thought nothing would surprise me. And now I learn that the humans are the real monsters after all."

Buffy put her arms around Angel's waist to hold him tightly

"I am afraid, Angel. Doyle told us that there are guys searching for you."

Angel kissed her on the forehead "They were searching for the demons."

"Don't try to calm me down. When they are searching for the demons they will also search for you."

"Possible. But there is nothing we can do right now, we have just to wait and see what happens."

Buffy stepped away from him and looked around the room, then she faced Angel again

"That's exactly the situation I hate most."

Part 12

After a boring patrol with not one vampire appearing Buffy and Angel returned to her apartment. They had stayed the whole evening with their friends at Giles'. Giles had made some phonecalls about Dr. Hartley but could not get any more information they already had. They did not research a lot, it almost seemed they wanted to be together as this could prevent any danger that might lay before them or in particular before Angel. Cordelia worried about Doyle too. So far he had not come in contact with the persons responsible for the experiments but as a half-demon he was certainly not safe and everyone admitted that to her. The only time they could relax was when Anne woke on her dad's lap and kept them busy for almost two hours. She obviously liked to be in the center of everyones attention, she was laughing a lot and wanted espcially to be around Angel whom she had never seen before. She insisted sitting on his lap and Buffy thought that Angel would be a great father one day. When she fell asleep again - this time in Angel's arms Buffy and he excused themselves for patrol. They had patroled four graveyards but there was no trouble in the air and so the highlights were the stops both made to kiss each other.

Holding hands they climbed the last stairs to Buffy's apartment only to find her mother waiting in front of the door. Angel felt Buffy tense at once:

"Mom. What a surprise." Her voice was like ice.

Joyce shifted uncomfortably:

"Buffy, Angel. Can I talk to you?"

Buffy passed her and opened the door:

"Sure, if you have to."

Angel looked at Buffy and tried to soften her with his eyes. He had the feeling Joyce had not come to fight and he knew that Buffy desperately wanted her mother to approve of their relationship. When everyone was seated in the living room

Joyce began "Buffy, I ... I ... I am so sorry. What I did ... telling Riley ... that was unforgivable."

Buffy looked at her without any emotion "Yes, it was."

Joyce took a deep breath "There is no excuse, I know. I ... I ... I am so sorry. Angel, I am sorry how I behaved this morning. It's only... seeing you brought back all the bad memories. Buffy running away, Buffy not telling me and so on."

"I cannot believe you are blaming him for me leaving the summer after my 17th birthday." Buffy's voice was still icey.

"I did ... oh, Buffy, I know I was acting irrational and I am sorry. I went to Mr. Giles to appologise and to talk to him. He ... Darling, when we had the fight this morning, after that ... you were crying and Angel was holding you. I then realised how much you mean to each other."

"And yet you told Riley."

"I am sorry. But I did not think that could cause any problems, I just thought an ex-boyfriend was asking for you."

Buffy rose and paced the room "And it never came to your mind that this was rather strange. I mean, think about it. He never ever calls for over five years and then out of a sudden he is interested in me. Come on, mom, you cannot be so stupid."

Joyce looked at her, then at Angel and back to her daughter who had stopped and crossed her arms before her chest:

"Sweatheart, I am really sorry. I admit I was angry seeing you with Angel for the reasons I have told you. But I thought about it and I know I was wrong. Could you maybe try to forgive me?"

When Buffy did not answer Angel spoke for the first time in this discussion:

"Buffy, maybe you should think about it. It needs a lot of courage to say something like that."

He turned to Joyce and gave her a smile. She was completely bewildered, the man she had treated like garbage tried to soften the waves between her and her daughter. Buffy closed her eyes for a moment, when she opened them again she said:

"I don't know mom, I don't know if I can forgive you. All I can think is that you put Angel's life in danger. I know you did not do it by purpose, but you did it because your hate for Angel was stronger than your love for me. That is a fact I have to digest."

Joyce only nodded but then asked "Is there maybe anything I can do? Anything to help you? Maybe I could call Riley and tell him I had mistaken Angel for someone else?"

Buffy laughed bitterly "He would never believe that. He might have been boring sometime but he's not an idiot. I bet he is right on his way to Sunnydale by now."

Joyce nodded again "Maybe then it's the best I leave now."

She looked again at Angel and then to her daughter:

"Sleep tight. And if there is anything ..."

"I will call you, mom. Good Night."

Buffy did not turn to see her mother out, when the door finally shut behind her she sighed "I know she is sorry, but I cannot just forgive her." Angel rose and crossed the room to stand in front of her. Embracing her he said:

"I know. But you should not push her out of your life. She loves you."

"Yes, she probably does, though sometimes it is hard to believe."

Angel smiled "I love you."

"Yes, I know. And I love you. But I still ... hey someone has called." Angel turned and he then saw the answering machine was blinking. Buffy went to press the button and nearly fainted the same minute.

'Vampire. You thought you could escape us. But we are still there. We might have missed you last time. But we did not forget about you. Remember Darla.'

Buffy embraced Angel so tight that he thought his ribs would break, her body was shivering and he could hear her crying. He tried to comfort her:

"Shhh... hey, please Buffy."

He directed her to the couch and pushed her down. Finally she looked up "Oh God, Angel."

"Shhh..."

"I cannot lose you again. I could never live through that."

"It's okay. You will not lose me."

"How can you say that? Did you not listen?"

"I got the same some years ago. Nothing happened."

"Nothing," Buffy shouted: "You disappeared for five years."

"I was captured in a lab. But I doubt these calls have anything to do with it."

"Oh and that is better? Now we have two different teams looking for you. That will make me sleep tight tonight."

"Buffy, I know you hate the situation. But it is different. Right, we do not know who they are, but we know something is going to happen, so we are prepared."

"We are not prepared. We do not know what we have to face. I am used to fight vampires but at least the people from the lab are humans. I have never killed a human being in my life."

"And you will never do such a thing, if I can prevent that. Buffy, we will deal with it when the time comes. It does not help if you make yourself sick out of worry."

"I cannot help. Angel, I am so scared. I have never been that scared since ... since I had to face the Master."

"And you won that battle. I believe in you, Buffy. You will win the next as well."

A small smile appeared on her face "You really trust in me."

"I do. You are the strongest person I have ever met."

"I love you, Angel. You will never know how much."

He smiled "I could guess."

"Hmmm... you could."

She reached out to touch his cheek and then moved closer for a kiss. It deepened imediately but was cut by a loud bang on the door. Buffy looked at the clock: "It seems to become a bad habit that people knock on my door at every time of the day."

She got up to answer the door. When Angel heard a loud gasp he run to her side only to look surprised at the visitor:

"Spike."

Part 13

"Spike," Buffy and Angel said unison.

The blonde vampire was standing there grinning: "Bloody Hell, that ex-watcher told me but I did not believe it. The Poof is back."

Angel nodded at him: "What do you want?"

"What's about your new attitude, peaches. Does that come with the whole human thing?"

Buffy sighed: "Spike, what do you want? And by the way why are you here at all? You disappeared from Sunnydale four years ago and all of a sudden you are standing in front of my door. So talk."

"Don't you invite me in? I've still got that bloody chip in my head, it's not that I can hit you or anything."

Buffy frowned: "Not that you ever could. So, come in."

He stepped into her apartment and looked around: "A fine place, slayer. Did you finally get away from mommy's lap."

Buffy rolled her eyes: "Spike, would you stop that. Just tell me why you are here?"

He took a seat on Buffy's couch: "Well, yeah ... why did I come? Oh, right. It's about that little ex-boy-toy of yours actually."

Buffy's eyes went wide: "Are we talking about the same person?"

"We bloody do. The one who placed that chip inside of me. That hell of a looser called Fish-Boy."

Buffy stepped closer to him: "What about Riley?"

"He is searching for the Poof here."

"How come you know that?"

"Come on, slayer. I might not be able to bite but I still got my sources. I was in LA you know, and they were running around there, asking questions."

Buffy exchanged a glance with Angel, who then asked "Who was asking questions?"

"Men. They were trying so hard to look unsuspicious that everyone knew they were not kosher. Besides humans searching for demons and vampires - look at me slayer, do you think I am stupid."

"Well... I don't know," Angel started but was cut off by Spike:

"Oh that is great. I am coming to warn you and the only thing you do is treating me like this. And what's that about you making jokes, is brooding-boy gone?"

"I really pity you, Spike," Buffy said with a little smile on her face:

"And how did you find out about Riley?"

"Fish Boy did ask questions as well. Though I do not know if he belongs to them or not."

"He was not with them?" Buffy gave Spike a questioning look.

"No, came on his own. Was looking for the poof - and when I am thinking back now, he did not know he was human."

"Why do you think that?" Angel sat down on a chair opposite to Spike.

"He was asking for Angelus, that's why. If he'd known you were human why would he do that?"

Angel nodded: "You are right. That would make no sense. Buffy, this is just getting weirder."

She settled herself in Angel's lap: "You are right. What are we dealing with? Three different parties now?"

Spike glanced at them "What the hell are you talking about?"

Angel encircled his arms around Buffy:

"It doesn't matter. Now tell me why you act all friend-like and came to warn us?"

"What? After all you are my sire, man. That means something."

Angel frowned: "Sure. That's why you tried to kill me from time to time or tortured me. Now come on."

"Alright, alright. The truth? I cannot stand that former boy-toy of hers," he pointed on Buffy: "after all he put that chip in my head. Have you any idea what that feels like."

"No, but frankly I don't care."

"Yeah, yeah, I thought you might say something like that. Hell it's really annoying to see what happened to you. You were such an evil bastard and now look at you. It was bad enough to see all that soul-boy crap and now you are a human, a bloody human. If that goes round in the vampire community..."

Buffy and Angel could not help but laugh.

"Hey, that's not funny. Think of it, when they ask me about my sire, what am I gonna say?"

"I wished I had your problems," Buffy was still laughing but suddenly became serious again:

"So, do you really want to help us."

He nodded:

"That's what I said. I am going to stay at the watcher's house. You know feels a bit like home and all. So count me in. I am your man, slayer."

"Or whatever," Buffy muttered.

"Hey, I heard that. I am going now. Leave you two because you make me sick - all this affection. See you then, slayer, peaches."

With this he was gone.

Angel looked at Buffy: "Well, that was unsuspected."

She nodded:

"You can say that. Now, where were we..."

With this she pulled his head down again and there was no more time for words that night.

********

Riley Finn was on a mission. A mission he had started many years ago. He was on his way to Sunnydale. He finally would finish what he had started. Finally he would find a way to live in peace.

********

Giles greeted Buffy and Angel the next morning when they arrived at his apartment:

"Good Morning, did you sleep well?"

Buffy looked at him:

"As a change nobody was knocking at our door this morning." Giles noticed that she had said 'our door' but did not comment on it. Wesley was already sitting in the living room but beside him there was nobody. Angel asked:

"Where are they?"

"Oh, Cordelia and Doyle went to LA yesterday night. It was a sudden decision. Doyle got a phonecall and Cordelia did not want to stay here on her own. But they promised to be back tonight. Oz is at work as are Xander and Anya. But Willow will come soon. She'll bring Anne, because her mom is out of town."

Buffy looked around "Where's Spike?"

"Up here slayer," shouted the familar voice.

Giles grinned "He is in the bathroom. Safest place," he explained to Angel and went on:

"How do you know he is here?"

"He dropped by last night."

"I see. Did you speak to your mother? She came to get some answers. She was really very sorry, Buffy."

"I know. We talked, but I am not leaving her off that easy. She's done to much damage."

Giles nodded and came back to buisness:

"We have some news about the people who captured Angel. Kate phoned Doyle last night, before they left and she got hold on some files. It seems that some people from the former Initiative were working there. We found Forrest's name on the employee list."

Buffy's eyes widened "You have an employee list?"

"Well, not a whole list, only some parts, some names. The others did not help at all. However, the project was called LINES whatever that stands for. For what we know now they were not government-related. It seems some private investigator was supporting their work."

Angel looked at him "Did Kate say anything else?"

"Well ... she's coming to Sunnydale."

"She's what?" Angel could not believe it.

"She said, we could need her help. And she is going to bring some more files with her. And she is bringing her boyfriend, he seems to be an officer as well."

Angel shook his head "Somehow I do not like that. I may not be a vampire anymore but I can still trust my guts and it says this is not going to be good. Why would she come here and bring her ... whatever."

Buffy looked at him "What do you mean?"

"I don't know, I just have a bad feeling. That's all. I mean I have spoken to her, she gave me informations about Doyle, she asked if I would be around and left and now she is coming. This makes no sense."

Buffy nodded "You are right. But then I do not know her, well, not really. I only met her... forget that. Giles, when will she be here?"

"Around noon."

Part 14

Doyle and Cordelia were on their way back to Sunnydale when they passed a familiar car. Cordelia turned and glanced at the driver:

"Doyle, that was Kate."

"Yeah, I saw that. Was her car."

"Oh, the day gets brighter and brighter," she sighed.

"Delia, dear. Don't worry, we will be there before them."

"She might have noticed our car as well."

Doyle grinned: "Don't you overlook something? We are not driving in our car, it's Xander's."

Cordelia nodded "You are right. Hopefully they have not recognised us. Hey we should have looked more careful at her company. There was definitely someone sitting beside her."

Doyle frowned "Do you think it was him?"

"I hope not, Doyle, I hope not."

********

Buffy jumped up when she heard the doorbell at Giles' apartment and stormed to answer it. She smiled when she saw Cordelia and Doyle but her smile faded quickly when she saw their worried gazes.

"What's up?"

Cordelia took her hand:

"Let's go in Buffy, we have some bad news."

Buffy felt the fear creeping inside of her. She had known something bad would happen, she had been so happy the past days, happy with Angel. But happiness with Angel never lasted long, she was an expert in that. So she followed Cordelia and Doyle with her heart beating in her throat.

"We have bad news, Angel," Cordelia started at once: "we wanted to come tonight, but decided to hurry. I told you about Kate's new boyfriend, Frank? Well, it seems that was not his real name. I checked his data on the computer and there was no Frank Hudson, as Kate told us his name."

"Frank Hudson," replied Angel thoughtful.

"Yeah, but as I told you, this is not his real name." She stopped to take a deep breath: "His real name is Dr. Francis Hartley."

Everyone stared at her. Buffy stepped back and sat down beside Angel gripping his hand tightly. She whispered:

"Oh God."

Cordelia nodded:

"You can say that. I do not know though if he befriended Kate by purpose but I truly believe it. I mean look at Kate, who would...", when she saw Doyle's look on her, she shrugged: "Oh, however. Beside this, it is too much of a coincidence, don't you think. I mean, Kate is a friend or whatever of ours, we are connected to Angel... just think about it. The only thing I do not understand is, they are together since three months according to Kate. He would not have known that the lab would be burnt down, would he?"

Giles shook his head:

"Kate is coming today and she said she would bring her friend."

Cordelia glanced at Doyle:

"I told you we should have had a better look." She turned to face Angel and Buffy again:

"We passed Kate's car on the way. She is not far behind us."

Suddenly Buffy jumped up: "We have to hide Angel," she shouted.

Angel took her hand:

"Buffy..." he started but was cut off by his lover:

"You have to hide, please Angel. We can deal with them, I just want you out of the picture for a while."

Angel saw her pleading eyes but he knew she was wrong this time:

"I understand how you feel, Buffy. But it would not solve the problem only delay it."

"But..."

"Buffy, they already know I am here."

Buffy fell back on the couch and burried her face on Angel's chest. His arms encircled her tightly and he could feel how she slowly relaxed. He put his hand under her chin and forced her to look at him:

"I know this is a challenge, Buffy, but I know we will overcome this - together, you and me and our friends."

"God, how I want to believe you, Angel."

"Then do it. I am right, I know it, I just feel it."

He tried to sound positive but was not at all sure himself. At least it seemed to help Buffy, because she tried a little smile:

"Together then."

"Together." Cordelia added.

*******

Kate did not understand why Frank had been so eager to come with her to Sunnydale. When she had told him she needed to go there to bring some informations and to help an old friend he persuaded her to take him with her. He pointed out that he would be of great help and that her friends were his friends too. He had looked at her with the most wonderful smile he was capable of and finally she had agreed to his wish.

Now they were just passing the 'welcome to Sunnydale' sign and Kate sighed. She glanced over to her lover who was soundly asleep beside her. Her lover, she thought. She had finally found someone she was able to love. She once had thought Angel could have been the one but he had been always so distant and brooding. Even after she had found out his secret he had never shown any romantic interest in her. After he had disappeared she had spoken to Doyle about that. He only told her that there was someone in Angel's life, a woman, he had been deeply in love with but they had broken up. When she had asked why, Doyle hesitated with the answer and finally said 'he just loved her to much'. Kate had thought about that but it never made sense to her. How could Angel love a woman that much and let her go. Later she had come to the conclusion that him being a vampire must have been the reason.

And then Angel was standing in his office, after everyone thought him dead for five years. Kate was still in shock about that. He was alive, back - he was not gone. And he had changed, the fact he was still alive had been a shock to her but also the way he behaved. First of all she had seen it in his eyes. The guilt and sadness were almost gone and replaced by something Kate could not really find the words for. Was it happiness? Was it joy? Whatever it was, it was new and it was almost breathtaking. He seemed so strong. When she had embraced him she was taken aback by the fact he was actually warm. Warm? What could that mean? She had left the office that afternoon because she had to digest everything she had seen. But she could not sleep that night. She refused to make love to Frank that night, she was just to confused. When she had received the information about Dr. Hartley she had phoned Doyle over the cell phone and announced her coming to Sunnydale. There was no real reason for this, but she just had to see Angel to get her thoughts straight, she just had to find out. She took a deep breath when she pulled her car in front of the appartment complex Doyle had described. She looked over to Frank who was still not awake, so she decided to let him sleep and walked the few steps to the door.

********

Willow stood by the window near the door when Kate's car arrived in front of the apartment. She turned to face her friends and smiled when she saw her daughter sleeping in Angel's arms. She just loved the ex-vampire:

"Hey guys. That Kate, is she blonde, bony and desperate looking?"

Cordelia grinned and nodded: "Yeah, that's her. You know I actually gave her some advices about her makeup but she wouldn't listen. Now you can see the result." She sighed.

Doyle could not prevent a short laugh but became serious again when he looked at Angel: "So she is finally here. Willow, does she come on her own?"

"Well, there is someone in the car with her, but she is on her way here alone. I'll let her in. Remember what we said, maybe she knows nothing about her friend, so be nice, be careful." She looked around and then left the room to let Kate in.

She opened the door and smiled:

"Hey. You must be Kate. I am Willow, a friend of Angel's."

Kate nodded and tried a smile:

"Hello. Nice to meet you."

Willow stepped back to let her in and showed her into the living room. When Kate entered it her heart nearly stopped. Angel was sitting on a couch, a blonde woman leaning against his shoulders and a little girl sleeping in his lap. She swallowed: "Hello, Angel." Then she glanced at Doyle and Cordelia and nodded to greet them as well. Willow came to her side: "As we have already met, I just introduce you to Rubert Giles. And you have met Wesley, I figure."

Kate looked at the them both and nodded again. Willow then smiled looking at Anne: "Oh, and this is my little daughter, Anne. Oh, and I forgot, you have met Buffy, haven't you?"

Buffy looked at her: "We have - shortly."

Kate tried to remember her: "I do not know?"

So Angel explained: "You remember, the thing with Faith?"

"Oh, of course. Sorry. How do you do, Buffy?"

She grabbed in her bag and pulled out a large envelope and handed it to Doyle:

"These are all the files I could get. Frankly I have not read all, they are just too much and do not tell me a lot anyhow."

"Thanks." Doyle simply answered. He walked over to the table between Giles' stacks and soon he and Cordelia were studying the files.

Kate coughed uncomfortably and suddenly it hit her, Angel was sitting in the living room ... in the SUNLIGHT. She gasped and stared at him:

"How? I mean ... Angel, what happened?"

He looked confused: "What do you mean?"

"You are a vampire. Why? I ... you are sitting here in daylight."

She nearly fainted when the brightest smile appeared on his face and he said:

"I am no vampire anymore, Kate. I am a human being now."

Kate had seen a lot before she had met Angel and even more afterwards but that was just to much. She made a step back and grabbed for a chair to fall backwards into it. She continued staring at him, when suddenly Buffy spoke:

"Are you alright, Kate? Do you need a glass of water?"

Kate shook her head: "No, I am fine. It's just a ... surprise."

Buffy grinned: "Tell me about it."

She turned to face Angel and gave him a soft kiss on his cheek. Kate saw his eyes lighting up the same moment and she saw the love they showed. That's her, she thought suddenly, that is the woman. The woman Doyle talked about. Of course her head was telling her, now he is human - however that happened - and he went to see her. She was disturbed in her thoughts when Cordelia asked: "Now, Kate. Did come Frank with you?"

Kate realised the silence that fell over the whole room when Cordelia had asked her question but could not quite find an explanation for it so she just shrugged and answered:

"He did. He is in the car, he fell asleep on our way and did not want to wake him."

"How long do you know him," Angel asked softly.

"About three months. We met in a bar."

Angel rose an eyebrow thinking about their first meeting:

"Does he work with you? Cordelia told me he is one of your collegues."

"Actually he is not, or he is. He is a cop but he does not work in my department. He works for the internal affairs. He sort of works undercover if there is a suspicion that officers are not working legally."

Cordelia coughed slightly and crossed the room to face Kate:

"So you never saw him in his office?"

"No. What is this all about? Why are you asking these questions? Why are you so interested in Frank?"

"His name is not Frank," Cordelia said coldly.

Kate looked at her in disbelief: "Not Frank? What do you mean."

Cordelia just handed her a sheet she had found in the files. A picture and description of Francis Hartley. Kate looked at the page in front of her and gasped and whispered: "That is not true. That cannot be true."

Cordelia laid a hand on her shoulder:

"I am sorry Kate, but it seems he only used you to get informations about Angel."

"No," Kate shouted and jumped up: "He loves me. He said he loves me." Finally she broke down on the chair only whispering: "Oh, god."

After a few minutes she was able to collect herself. She looked up with tears in her eyes and Angel thought that he had never seen her like that before. She looked shattered. Her voice was broken when she finally spoke:

"I am so sorry, Angel. And I led him right to you. I cannot believe I was so stupid."

Angel shook his head:"There is nothing to be sorry for Kate. He fooled you and used you. You are a victim."

Buffy nodded "He is right, Kate. I am really sorry for you, but we cannot think about that now, we have to find a way to deal with him."

Kate looked up and looked straight in her eyes: "No. YOU will not do anything. It is my turn, I will deal with him - in my way."

She stood up and with a final glance at all the people in the room she turned and left.

Part 15

Everyone in the apartment was so stunned by Kate's reaction to the story that none of them moved for some seconds. Then Angel jumped up with a horrified look on his face:

"Come on Buffy, we have to stop her, you know what she wants to do. We cannot let her do that."

"I do not see why killing him is a bad idea." They heard Cordelia's statement when they run to the door only to find Kate standing in front of it, her hand rised to knock. Her face was desperate:

"He is gone. I went to the car. I wanted ... and he was gone."

Angel took her arm and gently led her back into the apartment. Buffy closed the door behind them. In the living room Kate broke down again, cluching at Angel and crying out of desperation. A sudden feeling of jealousy roused in Buffy but she quickly suppressed it. Be a friend, she got some dreadful news she told herself, Angel is just comforting her. But she also heard the tiny little voice saying that Cordelia once told her Kate had a crush on Angel. You are a grown up woman, the other voice told her, act like that. So Buffy decided to follow the grown up part in her, laid a hand on Kate's shouder and patted her softly: "Now, now. It will be alright."

That's classical she told herself, Buffy you are a psychiatrist, be professional, be supporting. She made eye contact with Angel and led them to the couch. Then she hushed Angel away to sit in front of the woman she hardly knew.

Taking her hands she said: "Are you feeling any better?"

Kate rose her head and Buffy could see all the pain she was unable to hide in her eyes: "How could he do that to me. He told me he loved me."

"Maybe he does," Willow threw in. When she saw everyone's eyes on her she shrugged: "He still could. I'm sorry, I was just trying to help."

Buffy put her concentration back to Kate:

"I know, this is very hard. Maybe it can help you that you are not the first woman that is used this way."

Kate tried to smile: "You think sharing the pain can lessen it."

But Buffy shook her head: "No it cannot, but it can help you feel less alone in all this."

Angel looked at his beloved and a feeling of pride rose in him. She had grown up so much. Okay it had been 12 years since they'd first met. And she had also developed physically and she had always been strong, but now he adored a real mature woman, someone who was able to put everything aside when she needed to help another person, even her own fear and desperation.

He saw Kate looking at him and smiled reassuringly, then Kate looked back at Buffy: "You are good at that. Are you a psychiatrist or something like that."

Buffy smiled: "Exactly that. I am still a beginner, but I try to do my best."

Kate now smiled too: "I think you will have a great career." Then she turned to face Angel again:

"That's her, I guess."

When she saw Angel's confused gaze, she said "Doyle once told me you were in love with someone, someone who you could not be with. It's Buffy, am I right."

Angel only nodded and Kate took a deep breath:

"Okay, enough grief for today. Back to business, is there anything I can help you with?"

**********

Riley drove to Buffy's old house. He did not know if she still lived here, he was pretty sure she did not but at least her mother could give him her new adress. Joyce had been so helpful and nice to him. Obviously she never approved of Buffy's relationship to ... he was not even able to think about that. He had been so much in love with her and had set high hopes in that relationship. He should have known from the start that there was something wrong with her. When she laughed at him the laughter never truly reached her eyes, when she kissed him he always felt as if there had been a third ... he did not want to call it a person, not even in his thoughts and when they had made sex, well it had been nice and passionate but somehow she had never really been there, not deep inside. As if there had been something inside her he could never reach. When he found out that she had dated a vampire and more than this he really freaked out. He had nightmares for weeks about that, it was too horrible to imagine. When she broke up with him, Riley was hurt although he somehow had expected it. But that did not change his love and devotion for her. He had watched her the following years, her relationships and her failure with them. She was never truly happy and Riley knew who was responsible for this - the vampire, a creature of the night, a creature of pure evil. He had forced himself into the life of a helpless teenager and spoiled her for all other men. He had to admit that Buffy actually was not a helpless teenager at all, but she had not been damaged physically but mentally.

Seeing this a feeling of hate grew in him, a feeling he had never thought he would be capable of. He started to hate Angel as he was loving Buffy and a plan had formed in his head, he would destroy that creature and bring back peace to Buffy's heart and as a result giving her back the ability of being truly happy.

He started by studying Angel's life from the very beginning, reading everything he got in his hands. He had started his vengeance plan and was ready for the kill. Then he heard the vampire had died and Riley relaxed for the first time in four years. Now she was free, now she could start a new life without the shadows of the past. He was even able to move away from Sunnydale and start a new life of his own or at least an existence. He began to work for an organization that was researching about demons and vampires - similar to the Initiative, just Riley's department, in New York. When everything seemed to perfect and he was even starting to date a girl he had met in a restaurant one evening he was overhearing a conversation between two demons that had been captured only days before. He was not really listening when the name 'Angelus' got his full attention. He took the demon out of his cage and tortured him until he told him he had seen Angelus only some days before in LA. The demon had been in a lab which had been set on fire and all inhabitants escaped.

The very thought of that monster being still alive and certainly going after Buffy made him move. He had phoned Mrs. Summers and asked carefully about her daughter. When she had told him she had seen Buffy with Angel he had found out her phone number and called. When nobody answered he had decided to leave them a message or leave him a message actually. He would understand, Riley was sure of that.

Riley tried to collect himself then he rose his hand to knock. Only seconds later the door was opened and Joyce Summers stood in front of him. He smiled at her:

"Mrs. Summers, how nice to see you again."

He was stunned when he saw her face drop:

"What do you want," she asked coldly.

"I ... I am sorry, but could you please tell me how I could contact Buffy. It is of the utmost importance."

"I am not telling you anything."

Riley did not understand why she behaved like this. She had been so open on the phone. The vampire it shot through his head. He must have done something to her or maybe ... a fear rose in him ... maybe he had done something to Buffy, maybe he is holding her as a prisoner. So he tried again:

"Please Mrs. Summers, you have to tell me. Buffy is in great danger. Maybe she does not know, but she is. If you love her you have to tell me."

Joyce heard his pleading voice and she was about to belive him when she looked in his eyes. She could hardly avoid a gasp, they had a haunted look, almost posessed. This man was insane. She felt the fear inside of her, he was tall and strong and she instantly knew that she would never be able to prevent him from hurting her if he wanted. Her thoughts raced and she was desperately trying to find a solution for this. What should she tell him, then it hit her. Smiling she said as gently as she could:

"Riley. I am sorry I cannot invite you in but I am about to go. Buffy, well you should find her ... or better I write it down for you."

She turned to find a piece of paper and a pencil, quickly wrote down an adress and handed the paper to Riley. She smiled again:

"Here, you should find her there."

Riley looked on the paper and slowly nodded:

"Thank you, Mrs. Summers, you probably saved her life."

With this he turned and headed for his car, the paper clutched in his hands, now he would be able to show Buffy how much he loved her, now he would be able to make her happy.

Joyce was shivering when she closed the door behind her. She took a deep breath and then took the phone dialing Giles' number.

Part 16

"Oh Dear, Oh Dear," muttered Giles when he put the receiver back down on the phone. He turned to face Buffy and Angel:

"That was your mom. Riley paid her a visit."

"He was at mom's house?"

"It seems so. He told her you were in great danger and that she had to tell him where you were so he could save you. Your mom gave him my adress because she thought he would find you anyhow and she thought it would be the best we were prepared."

Buffy stood up from her comfortable seat beside Angel and crossed her arms before her chest: "I cannot believe it. Riley desperately has to get over himself. Who does he think he is?"

Giles shook his head:

"I do not think it is that easy. Your mom said he was quite mad, almost insane."

Buffy sighed: "Oh no, hey I am on vacation and all I do is deal with psychotic humans who go after my boyfriend." She looked at Angel and rolled her eyes, he gave her a small smile. He was happy she was now in fighting mood and not desperate anymore - at least for now.

Anya, who had come over with Xander after work suddenly shrieked: "Hey, there is Riley. Oh man, he has aged. I think his hair is already a bit greyed and he has gained a stone of weight at least."

Xander joined his wife at the window and glared on the street. Then he said: "She is right. Buffy, he looks as if he has been working out every day. And his face is quite determined. He is coming over here."

Buffy was pacing the room:

"He is coming here? He really must have gone psycho. What does he want I wonder."

Xander grinned: "You, I guess."

Angel stood up as well and growled at him. Then he walked over to Buffy and slipped an arm around her waist: "You are the expert, Buffy. What are we going to do?"

She shrugged: "I wish I would know. I do not know what his problems are - so how should I know what to do."

Xander let out a short laugh and then said: "We could take him prisoner and force him to stay with Spike in a room for a week."

Everyone stared at him. Xander only shrugged and turned his face to the window.

******

Riley looked again at the paper Joyce had given him and frowned. This was the house of Buffy's watcher. Why had Joyce sent him there? Was Buffy living here now? He shrugged, it was not really important. He rose his hand and rang the bell.

******

When Willow was about to open the door Buffy grabbed her arm:

"No, Willow. I'll go."

"Do you think this is wise?" Angel did not like the idea of Buffy facing Riley.

She turned and gave him a quick kiss: "Let me deal with him, honey. He obviously came to save me and as you said, I am the expert."

She gave his arm a final squeeze and then turned for the door.

******

Buffy opened the door and tried her best smile: "Riley, what a surprise. What are you doing here?"

Riley looked at her and was stunned. She looked as beautiful as he remembered her, but there was more, she looked happy. For the first time since he had met her she looked genuinely happy. Yet his mind was already to clouded to process that information. He shook his head to get back into the presence and said: "Buffy. I came to talk to you. Do you now live with Giles?"

"Yes, you know that was much easier with the slaying," she lied.

He nodded: "I see. Don't you invite me?"

Buffy did not want him in the house, especially not in the same room with Angel, so she smiled again and said: "Why don't we talk outside. Giles had a rough night and just fell asleep on his couch in the living room," she tried to give him an explanation. He seemed content and stepped back and Buffy followed him, carefully closing the door behind her.

Riley looked at Buffy: "You look good, beautiful actually."

"Thank you. Riley, what are you doing here?"

He smiled: "I just wanted to see an old friend."

"Come on, Riley. I have not seen you in, what, five years."

He looked to the ground and when he rose his head again his eyes had a desperate and pleading look: "Buffy, I came for you. I came to help you. You don't have to lie to me, I know he is here. Angelus. But you don't have to be afraid, I am here to help you."

Buffy felt his hand on her own, she looked down and Riley let her go. She sighed:

"Riley," she began: "what do you mean: 'help me'?"

"We both know vampires can confuse other people's minds. Did he try to seduce you, Buffy?"

"No, Riley. Angel never tried anything. You are wrong about him, Riley. He is a good person."

Riley stepped back, rage in his eyes:

"A person. He is no person, he is an animal, a monster. Can't you see that, Buffy!"

Buffy stepped closer to him and tried to make eye contact all the time: "Riley, I know you are excited, but please calm down."

He shook his head: "I am not calming down."

Out of the blue he presented a gun and directed it on to Buffy's chest. Her eyes grew wide:

"Riley," she whispered.

"Where is he, Buffy? Where is his hiding place?"

"I am here, Riley," came Angel's voice from the doorstep. Buffy spun around, her breath came in short gasps. Her hands trembled and the fear seemed to knot her guts. Angel stood in Giles' doorframe, Buffy could feel the tense in his body, his eyes showed full concentration.

The moment Angel rose his voice Riley's had snapped to the side. He was not able to hide his astonishment when he saw Angel. There he was, the hated vampire... but something was wrong, something is wrong, Riley thought. What was wrong? Then it hit him, the vampire stood there in full sunlight. Riley blinked and tried to understand what was before him. Always watching Buffy, Riley stepped forward. He looked at Angel and shouted:"Why are you standing in the sunlight, vampire?"

Angel choose his words carefully, he was fully aware that Riley was dangerous especially with this gun in his hand: "What do you think?"

Riley shook his head: "I have no idea. Explain yourself."

"I am no vampire anymore."

Riley stepped back, his mouth open. Angel could see his astonishment. But this was quickly gone and the rage appeared in his eyes again: "Whatever you are. You have to die."

The next actions happened like slow motion before Buffy's eyes. Fear had frozen her body, her eyes were wide and she was not able to move. She heard someone pulling a trigger, the same minute Angel jumped in Riley's direction. The next she heard was a shot and then Riley fell to the ground with Angel on top of him. None of both moved, they just lay there. Buffy saw Xander and Willow appearing in the door, Willow holding a hand in front of her mouth and gripping for Xander's arm. And then Buffy felt herself moving and she cried: "Angel."

She sank to the ground beside the men's two bodies and reached out for him: "Oh god, Angel. Are you hurt?"

She was almost going insane because of the fear inside of her. Then Angel's arm moved first and he rose his head:

"Buffy."

Buffy broke down, the tears were flowing from her eyes:

"Angel, are you alright?"

He rose himself on to his knees, reached out for Buffy and hold her in a strong embrace: "Shhh... darling, I am alright. I am not hurt."

"B...But he, the gun, he sh-sh-shot at you."

Angel looked down at Riley who laid there, still and not breathing. A tiny trace of blood left his mouth. Angel cupped Buffy's cheek in his hand and forced her to look at him:

"He is dead, Buffy."

Buffy looked down at Riley and then back to Angel:

"But how?"

Angel looked over her shoulder and faced someone or something behind her. Buffy followed his gaze and saw Kate standing on the sidewalk. She faced Angel again and he explained: "Kate left the apartment through a window, Buffy. She was my cover."

"So the shot, it was not him."

Angel shook his head: "No. I would not be here holding you if he had had time to shoot."

Buffy threw her arms around his neck and held him tightly. She was so happy he was not hurt, he was safe in her arms, that was all that counted.

Kate stepped closer and looked at Angel:

"Are you really alright?"

"Yeah. Thank you, Kate."

She nodded: "You're welcome. And besides it is my job anyhow. Man, that guy was really mad."

Buffy turned round to face her. She took Kates hand:

"I cannot tell you how grateful I am. Thank you so much."

Kate rolled her eyes: "God, everyone is thanking me today." Then her face became soft and she smiled at Buffy:

"Sorry, I am not used to so much gratitude. But I am glad I could help. That makes me feel less guilty about Frank."

Buffy shook her head: "Don't, that was not your fault. You could not know what he is."

"I know, but it is not really helping, you know. And still we do not know where he is. I assume he would be a danger for Angel as well."

Buffy and Angel both stood up and Kate looked again on the ground:

"I will call the coroner and wait for him to explain the situation. And I will call my collegues, I fear they will have to make a protocol." She looked at Buffy and Angel. Angel said: "That's no problem."

She nodded: "Fine. You better go inside now. I am waiting here for them. I think I am more familar with the procedure."

She smiled slightly and hushed them inside.

*******

"I cannot believe you already killed him and had all the fun yourselves. You are selfish bastards."

Spike was sitting on the sofa in the living room. The coroner had taken Riley's body and the police had left only a few minutes ago. It was already dark outside.

Kate looked at Spike: "Well, he was trying to kill Angel, so we did not have a chance to wait for an audience."

Spike turned at Angel: "Hey, who is she? The month's wittiest chick?"

"Spike!" Buffy and Angel shouted unison.

"Alright, alright. I am quiet. Still - I cannot forgive you for taking all the fun part to yourself. Tell me, slayer, how was it? Did he hit the ground hard?"

Buffy rolled her eyes: "Spike, you are impossible."

"What can I say, I am evil." He grabbed for the remote control and switched on the telly.

Part 17

It was decided Kate would stay with Oz and Willow for the night. She did not want to go into the booked hotel room as nobody could know if Frank would show up. And nobody knew how dangerous he actually was or how many friends would be with him. Buffy rang her mother from Giles' place to tell her everything was fine, but she was still not ready to make peace with her.

Angel and Buffy were the last to leave and Giles showed them to the door:

"You both be careful. Don't you think I should drive you?"

"No, Giles. It's okay. We need to walk and maybe slay some vampires. This day really freaked me out, I need to kill something."

Giles chuckled and nodded: "Then good bye."

Angel nodded back, slung his arm around Buffy's waist and together they headed for the cemeteries.

Giles went back to the living room where Wesley was still reading a book.

"Wesley, do you want some tea?"

"Thank you, Giles, that would be very kind."

"Hell, watcher, don't you have anything else. Tea, tea, tea the whole day. I need a real drink."

Spike was still sitting in front of the television watching one of his favourite soap operas. Giles rose an eyebrow:

"It was your decision to come back to Sunnydale, Spike, you do not have to stay."

Spike looked at him:

"You are bloody right. And when I think why I came... and then missing the big moment, fish-boy on the ground. I am heading for Willy's for some nice type 0 and one or two glasses of real stuff. See you later."

With this he stood up and left.

Wesley stood up and switched the television off, seeing Giles coming back with two cups of tea he sighed: "He could at least clean when he leaves."

Giles nodded: "I really did not miss him. But as the situation is now we might need him as much as I hate to say that."

"You are right, he could be a great help. And after all it is interesting to study him. He is completely different from all other vampires I have ever met."

"He is quite unique, he ever was I guess. Think alone of his love for that Drusilla. Spike without a chip certainly is one of most dangerous vampires I have ever seen and yet he was capable of real love. Very extraordinary."

Wesley sighed again: "I wish we would have to deal with the sorts of Drusilla now. Vampires are easier to handle. They are evil, they want to kill, in humans you never know."

Giles nodded and sipped at his cup.

********

Like in old times Buffy was seated on a gravestone, Angel standing between her legs, kissing her passionately.

"You...(kiss) know ... (kiss) ... this (kiss) ... remembers (kiss) ... me of old times."

He grinned: "It does. God, we were so innocent all those years ago. I was really believing that a relationship between a vampire and a slayer could work. I was so much in love with you, so blinded..."

"Stop that. I still believe you leaving me was the biggest fault you ever made."

"But Buffy..."

"I do not believe this. I cannot believe you still think you did the right thing."

Angel sighed: "Is this important now? I mean, this is long gone, right. I am human now."

Buffy shook her head: "It is important, Angel. I know we have been so busy with Riley and Dr. Hartley and with each other that we did not really talk, but there are some things, important things that we have to work through."

"Alright, if you need to do this now. Yes I truly believed it was right. I do not say that I wanted to do this. It nearly killed me, thinking about you in the arms of another man, thinking you could maybe love him... But you had a right for a normal life, to be happy."

"Happy," she echoed: "Happy, Angel I was never truly happy after you left."

"I know. Now. Besides I was scared, scared you could hate me one day for what I might have kept from you. Only the imagination you could hate me was worse then any separation from you. When you came to LA, when you saw me with Faith. God, I loved you so much then. You were so beautiful. Then you told me you were happy, with Riley, you would trust him. It hurt, Buffy, that really hurt. But I knew that you had gained what I wanted for you. When you told me about him I wanted to pull you in my arms and kiss you and make you forget all about him."

When he saw Buffy was listening with big eyes he continued:

"About a second after I left you I knew it was going to be the hardest decision I had ever made. But I did it for you or at least I thought I did. Today I know that part of it was the fact that I was a coward."

She smiled: "You are no coward."

"I was. Not in general, but when it came to you. I had been on earth for nearly a quarter millenium, I thought I knew everything and then a 16 year old girl changed my life. For the first time I felt true love, I felt heartache, I experienced the feeling that the other is more important than yourself. The love to you made me vulnerable, but on the other hand it made me whole. That was new and confusing. That night with you, the night of your 17th birthday was so perfect, I had never been so happy in my whole life or rather un-life. And this pure joy created a monster. Angelus. After I returned from hell all I wanted was to keep you safe, to make amends for the many times I hurt you."

Buffy looked at him, her eyes full of love and devotion: "You did not hurt me, it was him."

"Yes, I know Buffy. But at that point I was not able to see it. The demon was still inside of me and after my latest experience I was living in constant fear he could make an appearance again. The thought alone of hurting you was almost to much to bear. And then you made me drink your blood. You cannot imagine the shame I felt for it. Did you never ask yourself why I left the hospital after I brought you there? I phoned Giles to tell him you were in the hospital. They saw me and instantly knew what had happened. I could not stand to look in their eyes, their eyes so full of disgust."

"But Angel, it was not your fault. I forced you, you were almost dead."

He nodded: "I know, but nevertheless I was ashamed that I had not been stronger. That I did not refuse your offer. After that, after experiencing my real weakness my mind was made up. When I lay there on my bed I was dreaming about you and I decided it was wrong to leave you, but after..."

Buffy laid her hands on his cheeks: "I am glad, I did what I did. You would have died that night. I never could have lived with that."

Angel kissed the scar on her neck: "You still have this."

"I know. And I love it." When she saw his surprised look she said: "When we thought you were dead it was the only thing that was left from you. The only thing that remembered me our love was real."

Angel kissed her again: "Oh, Buffy, I love you. I never thought, I would hold you again like this."

She smiled: "I love you too. I love you so much it hurts sometimes."

They kissed again. Suddenly Buffy grinned:

"You know I just thought, this is a very odd place for a conversation like that."

He grinned back: "You can say that."

"But I don't really mind, as long as we can work through it. But this gravestone is going to become uncomfortable. My butt hurts."

He laughed: "You think it was enough patrol for tonight?"

"Is there anything else you have in mind?" She grinned at him mischieviously.

"Maybe," was his cryptic answer. He kissed her again.

"Hmmm," she moaned: "that definitely has potential."

Angel did not stop to kiss her, he trailed kissed down and up her neck, muzzling at her ear. Buffy felt shivers all over her body. Heavily breathing she pulled back and looked at him with dark eyes:

"I think we better go home. Otherwise this might cause some problem."

Angel's eyes were nearly black by now:

"I think you are right. We better go."

He gave her a hand and together they reached the apartment in record-time.

********

When Spike stepped out of Willy's bar he felt refreshed after some nice type O and half a bottle of malt whisky. Life was good, he thought, he had almost forgotten that there was still a chip in his head. He also had some new informations although it made Spike sick to think he had to pay for them now.

Like Xander, he thought, I am no better than Xander. That really sucked. In the good old times Willy had told him everything at once, but now... maybe life was not so good after all.

********

Somewhere in Sunnydale Francis Hartley was standing in front of his men. About 20 were gathered around him and listening to every word he said. He smiled inwardly, it really paid that he had implanted them a mind-control chip. They had found six of the demons so far. But the most important one was still free. He had created a human out of a demon. He did not know why or how it had happened, he had tried it again with other vampires but without success. But still, there was this one. And he was not willing to give him up.

Part 18

Nothing happened the next weeks in Sunnydale. Everyone expected Dr. Hartley to move but he didn't. They couldn't even find out where he was. Kate stayed in Sunnydale, she had phoned her boss and got some days off, unpaid of course. But she was to much involved in the whole thing and felt to guilty to leave. Buffy and Angel patrolled every night and slayed some vampires, but also there nothing spectacular was going on. Everything seemed just pleasant and quiet. Buffy did not like that, she did not like it at all. From experience she just knew that it was never good when things were to perfect.

Doyle tried all his sources but could not find anything that would help. Then Spike came up with some news from Willy. He told the group that some demons had been captured in LA and all of them had been in the lab before. That was definitely not good.

Angel could feel that Buffy was freaking out more and more and even if he didn't feel it, her nightmares would show him. Every night she woke up with a start, her body wet she was breathing heavily. The dreams were a mixture of the past and her present fears, she saw Angel dying all the time. She saw him when he lost his soul, when Giles attacked him in the factory and burnt the building, when she stabbed him and he had to go to hell. And she saw him lying on his bed in the mansion, the horrible wound in his chest and being so weak he was barely able to sit. But there were some more disturbing pictures, when Angel was standing in the sunlight and people put handcuffs on him, they were dragging him into a black van and they were pleased because they had got what they wanted. Buffy herself was crying but not able to help him. These nightmares were the worst because Buffy was afraid they were prophetic. Giles told her that there were no prophecies at the moment, but she kept telling him that everything was so vivid and she knew what vivid dreams mostly meant to her. Somehow they came true. The idea of loosing Angel again was something Buffy was not able to face. Only to think about it was nearly driving her insane. Now when he was human, when they finally had a real chance to be together something seemed determined to destroy it.

"It is not fair," she shouted. She and Angel were walking to Willow's house. She had found a little protection spell and wanted to do it for Angel. She was not really sure how it would work but he could need any protection possible. Angel looked at her:

"Buffy, what it the matter?"

She faced him and then just realized she thought aloud: "Oh, sorry. I was just thinking."

He smiled: "And what was on your mind?"

"I just thought that it is not fair. We went through so much to get what we have now and even now there are some people who try to destroy it."

He slung an arm around her waist and said: "This is not going to happen. I promise. I am back for good, I am not going away."

She shook her head:

"Maybe it is not in your power to decide this. What if someone drugs you and ..."

"Shhh, don't say that. You make yourself sick with all the worrying, please Buffy."

"I cannot believe how calm you are. Don't you realise how dangerous the situation is?"

"I do. But it won't help if I go mad. We have to stay calm and focus."

She stopped to face him: "Did anyone ever tell you that you are amazing?"

He smiled: "You just did."

She stood up on her toes and kissed him:

"Mmmmm... you are. I already feel better."

He chuckled:

"You taste wonderful, I can taste ... (kiss) ... bacon (kiss)... eggs (kiss) and coffee." Angel licked his lips and Buffy grinned:

"That's because you are not only a good lover you are a good cook too."

"I always knew that you only wanted me for the carnal lust."

"You've got it. I always knew you were a smart guy."

They kissed again.

"Hey did anyone ever tell you that PDA is really out."

They turned around and Angel grinned:

"Morning to you too, Cordelia. Where is Doyle."

"He went to LA, some research. He'll be back tonight. You know that gets annoying, we have a buisness in LA but it seems the headquarters moved to Sunnydale."

Angel laughed: "I am really wondering how I could spent five years without you."

She grinned back: "Yeah, hard to believe. Where are you going?"

"Willow's," Buffy answered.

"Oh, my way."

Bufffy frowned: "Why are you going to see Willow?"

"She wanted to show me something. You?"

"She found a protection spell for Angel."

"Good, he'll need that."

********

After Willow had cast the spell she looked up at Angel:

"How do you feel?"

"I don't know. I do not really feel anything different, it's just..."

When he saw Willow's expecting expression he tried to explain: "It's as if something is watching over me. Does that sound to weird?"

Willow smiled: "No, that's exactly what was going to happen. It's kinda producing a guardian angel. You will see exactly what it means when it is needed."

Part 19

Buffy looked at Willow and smiled:

"Thank you for that, Will."

"You're both welcome."

Cordelia was staring at her hands and pretended a yawn: "That is all very nice. But Willow what did you want to show me?"

"Uuuum ... I actually. I wanted to show you. to be frank, nothing. I just needed you here for the spell."

Cordelia's eyes grew wide

"Me?"

"Yes, because for the spell and old friend, a new friend and the real love are needed. So that would be us."

"Hey we know Angel for the same time."

"But you weren't exactly his friend before moving to LA, right?"

"Whatever," said Cordelia rolling her eyes: "Does that mean I can go now?"

Buffy frowned: "Are you busy today?"

"No, but with all the evil going around I need a day off. Going to the beach for a break."

With this she stood up and left but turning again in the door: "I will be back tonight. It's not that my husband will be back 'til then anyhow."

Willow grinned: "She's still Cordy. So you both, what are you going to do today?"

Buffy shrugged: "Well as it is a Saturday I do not really know. Being lazy."

Angel took her hand: "We do a lot of 'lazy' these days."

Willow blushed: "I SO do not need to hear that."

Buffy laughed: "Willow, you have a daughter and are expecting your second child, why are you still blushing?"

"Well, that's. that's the embarrassment thing. that's it."

Angel looked at her smiling:

"I think that is very charming, Willow."

She blushed even more:

"I never thought you and compliments would mix, Buffy is right, you really have changed."

Angel bowed down to kiss Buffy slightly on the cheek and then on her ear, whispering:

"Does she say that. I am very interested what exactly you mean."

When Willow suddenly cleared her throat both looked up a bit sheepishly and Buffy said: "Sorry, Will, we got distracted. What was your question. Oh, yes what we are going to do. We'll see."

"Have you talked to your mom again, Buffy?"

"No, not really. I talked to her but did not TALK to her if you understand."

Willow only nodded: "She loves you, Buffy."

"Yeah, she probably does in her special strange way, but I am not relaxed enough to have the mother-daughter talk now."

"I understand. The mad doctor first, right?"

"Right. What's really wiggin me out is that we cannot locate him. If we'd know where he is we would be the ones with the first move. I would really prefer that. And saying that it is Saturday, where is Oz?"

"He took Anne to the beach. Her and the son of a friend who is four. This will be the hell of day for him," she grinned. Buffy and Angel laughed as well.

"What are you going to do today, Willow?"

Willow smiled and looked down to her swollen stomach:

"First of all I will rest for a while, the spell was a bit exhausting..."

"I am so sorry, we did not think about that." Angel's voice was full of concern, but Willow shook her head:

"No, no, no worries. I am fine and he is too - it will be a boy, did I tell you - anyhow, after resting I'm heading over to Giles. He wants me to find something on the net. You should really think after all these years he would have learned to use it himself, but he is still the bookish type."

"I think he is really suffering with Spike coming back, because the telly is running the whole day or make it the whole night."

Buffy and Willow giggled and Angel had to smile to. Spike and Giles together in one apartment was really something.

Suddenly Buffy was looking around: "Where is Kate by the way?"

"Oh she got herself a room in a hotel. I told her it was no problem staying with us but she did not like the idea of being a burden for us."

Angel took Buffy's hand: "I think we need to go now, love. We could buy something to eat and go for a picnic, I always wanted to take you out for one."

Buffy smiled: "That is so sweet. I like it."

Angel rose and gave Buffy a hand to help her up. She quickly hugged Willow and both left.

Part 20 and Epilogue

After their picnic Buffy and Angel went back to Giles' apartment where they suspected everyone. And they were already there except Cordelia and Doyle. Wesley and Giles went through books in foreign languages, while Willow was searching the net. Xander sat beside his wife on the sofa. She had fallen asleep in his arms. He was obviously talking to Kate. And of course Oz was missing - probably buried in the sand by the little ones.

Giles looked up when he saw his slayer:

"There, you are back. Did you have a nice time?"

When Buffy's giggle was the only answer he could not help but smile. Angel obviously had lightened her mood for the day.

It was the ringing of the phone that started the action. Giles got it and reached it to Angel who listened carefully. Buffy saw him tense, anger and concern were apparent in his eyes. When he finished the call he looked at his beloved:

"We have to get Cordelia. They've got Doyle. Somehow they must have found out he is a half-demon. This was Gunn on the phone, he sometimes worked with us."

"You think Dr. Hartley and his men got him."

Angel only looked at her and she nodded. Angel turned to face Giles:

"We have to find him, Giles. God knows what they'll do to him, he ... he is my friend."

"Do to whom?"

Everyone spun round to see Cordelia standing in the doorway. She had a questioning look on her face:

"Do to whom?" She repeated.

Angel stepped closer to her:

"Cordelia. I am sorry."

"Sorry, why. Why are you sorry, Angel?"

He took her arm: "It seems, Doyle has been captured in LA."

Cordelia looked at him, then she shook her head as if she was not able to proceed what he told her only to finally break down in his arms:

"Angel. Oh god." Angel embraced her tightly and led her over to the sofa where Xander and Anya had made room for her.

Buffy took a deep breath: "Angel is right. We have to find him quickly. Willow, look for every building in Sunnydale that has been rent just recently. They cannot be here for a long time. This may not help but it can be a hint."

While they were discussing and Angel tried to comfort Cordelia the phone rang a second time. Giles again handed it to Angel. He listened carefully and then said: "Alright, I'll be there." Buffy looked at him and he explained: "It was Dr. Hartley."

She gasped: "What?"

"He offered a trade."

"You for Doyle," Buffy whispered.

Angel only nodded and did not take his eyes from Buffy. He did not have to tell her what he was going to do, she knew instantly:

"I'll come with you."

He shook his head: "No, Buffy, not this time. His orders were very clear, I have to go alone."

"No, you are not going alone."

"Buffy."

"No, no way, Angel. You are not going alone."

She stood in front of him, her arms crossed, the lower lip quivering and tears in her eyes - and Angel thought she had never been so beautiful before. Cordelia looked up: "Angel, be no idiot. You cannot go alone. Do you think that man is faithful? He might take you and keep Doyle anyway."

Giles nodded: "She is right, Angel. I know you are concerned about your friend, but..."

Buffy cut in: "When will you meet?"

"An hour."

"Where?"

"In the mansion at Crawford street."

Buffy looked round: "Then we will be ready."

Everyone nodded at once.

*******

They informed Kate over the mobile phone and met 10 minutes before the date near the mansion. Buffy explained the situation to everyone and they made their plan. Willow and Anya had stayed at Giles because of their pregnancies. Buffy smiled inwardly thinking about that, she had something to tell Angel, but that had to wait. A minute before the meeting she took Angel's arm and looked him deeply in the eye: "You will be careful, right?"

"I will, I promised you, I am back for good."

She nodded and Angel wiped the tears from her eyes:

"We will make it, Buffy, you have to believe it."

"I love you, Angel, no matter what."

"The same here."

They kissed deeply, then Angel reluctantly broke the kiss, turned and left for the mansion.

*********

When he opened the door, Dr. Hartley was standing in the middle of the hall. He nodded when he saw Angel: "I am pleased you stick to your promise, vampire."

"I am no vampire."

"I know. I made you."

Angel looked around: "Where is Doyle?"

"Who?"

"Doyle, my friend."

"Oh, the halfbreed. Bring him in," he ordered to his left. Only seconds later two men brought Doyle who was handcuffed but besides this unharmed. He smiled when he saw Angel: "Sorry, man."

"Don't worry, everything will be alright."

Dr. Hartley looked back to Angel: "This is really very heartbreaking, but it does not concern me. Take him," he ordered again and at once six men appeared in the hall and encircled Angel.

The same moment the doors of the mansion opened and the gang entered the house. The fight was over before it had really begun. The commandos of Dr. Hartley fought their best, but were not strong enough to defend the united powers of Angel, Buffy and a freed Doyle together with Kate who was trained in martial arts. In the end Dr. Hartley was standing at the wall now wearing Doyle's handcuffs. Kate stood before him, still pointing the gun to his head. He looked at Angel:

"You were my masterpiece."

Angel only shook his head: "I am sorry to destroy your illusions, no actually I am not, but you had nothing to do with my humanity."

The doctor opened his eyes in astonishment: "You lie."

"Well, believe whatever you want."

He turned to face Buffy who had a relaxed expression on her face. He smiled and took her in his arms:

"It's over. It is really over."

She nodded happily and held him tight.

Then two policemen entered the mansion and Kate ordered them to take Dr. Hartley with them. She looked at Angel:

"I think, I am ready here as well. It is as if he was not the same man I knew. It was so strange."

Angel smiled: "Thank you, Kate, for everything."

She smiled back.

"You're welcome. Well, I think it's my turn to leave. I hope we will stay in touch."

"We will," he promised then he looked at Buffy: "I hope you will come to our wedding... soon."

Buffy's head shot up and she stared at him. She swallowed hard:

"Did you just propose to me?"

"Well...," he looked a bit sheepishly: "I think, I did. What do you think?"

"Yeah, well... but soon would be a good idea, otherwise you will have a whale walking down the aisle."

He grinned and then it hit him, he whispered: "What did you say? Did you say what I think?"

She only nodded. Angel felt the tears in his eyes:

"A baby?"

"Yes, a baby."

"When?"

"About 7 1/2 months."

"God, Buffy, that's, that's ..."

"I know. I feel the same way."

Angel embraced her tightly, then he lifted her from the ground and spun around the hall of the mansion. Both were laughing. They were interrupted by a coughing from the door, it was Giles. Angel let Buffy down and she looked at her watcher:

"Sorry."

"It's okay. May I ask?"

She smiled: "I am pregnant, Giles. Angel and I are going to have a baby."

"A baby?" Xander shouted from the other side of the room. "Buff, he is back for some weeks and you are already pregnant? You really don't lose time, do you?"

Buffy shook her head: "No, we don't. We both have learned how precious time is - especially for us."

She looked at Angel who returned her smile.

They received congratulations from all their friends.

EPILOGUE

Buffy and Angel were married four weeks later at a little church in Sunnydale. Buffy had finally made her peace with her mother but rejected her father giving her away. Instead of him, Giles was honoured with that task and he accepted gladly.

Willow had a baby boy only three weeks later, he was named David and had red hair. Anya had a boy as well and Xander nearly burst out of pride, they named their baby Giles to everyone's astonishment, but Anya loved the name and Giles was made a god-father.

Finally Buffy gave birth to a girl who had blonde hair and hazel eyes and Angel instantly fell in love with her. They named her Caitleen. When she was baptised Cordelia announced her three months pregnancy.

Spike stayed in Sunnydale, the four years away had been enough. He had come to like the people in Sunnydale although he was of course still evil and would never admit that he simply adored Caitleen who he baby-sitted from time to time so her parents could spend some time with each other.

At the age of 30 years Buffy was nearly killed by a vampire, she died but was revived afterwards in the hospital. A new slayer was called and as a result Buffy did not have to patrol every night. The new slayer was called Dana and after a year she fell in love with Spike. Giles was not surprised as he had some experience in slayer-vampire relationships.

Buffy and Angel had two more children and lived a long and happy life.

Send feedback to Jill

Back to the Fanfiction Archive