Disclaimer: I SO do not own them - sigh, so don't sue.
Distribution: Want it, take it, but tell me where it goes
Spoilers: the whole B/A-thing
Summary: after years of absence Angel's needed back in Sunnydale
Timeline: set into the future
Rating: mostly like the show, I think
Feedback: pretty please!!!
Dedication: To Claire, who did the beta-ing! Thanks, luv!!! The credits for the title go to her!!!!
AN: For this story, Angel left Buffy after Grad 2, with all the tears and heartbreak. BUT neither IWRY nor Sanctuary happened the way it did in the show. Angel came back to Sunnydale in Pangs, and Buffy went to see him in IWRY, but he didn't turn human. They just agreed to stay friends and accepted that their relationship - although they loved each other - couldn't work. As a result Buffy went to LA in Sanctuary, but they didn't fight. She just helped with Faith. The PTB even expected him to stay near to the slayer to help her if needed. (Remember what Whistler said in Becoming about Angel's destiny. I never get over the fact that Joss just forgot about it with a snip of his finger - sigh). So he went to Sunnydale from time to time to help out. Anything else is explained in the story.
AN2: I'm not good at that future stuff. You know electronic things and all. So although it's set in the future, the basic things I just take from the present.
MAJOR ANGST WARNING - CHARACTER DEATH

Part 1

Sunnydale 2060

It felt awkward, he had to admit. It had been so many years since he'd been there. A half life ago actually. A human life that was. For a vampire like him it wasn't that much or shouldn't be.

Sunnydale.

A name that still haunted his dreams, forever connected with a dream that wasn't meant to be. Forever connected with the only woman he'd ever loved.

Walking down the streets in the moonlight the whole scenery had changed and was yet so familiar, he knew every corner, every street and still discovered something new. It warm and a soft breeze played in the air. He expected her to come around the corner and smile at him, a little bit uncertain of herself but determined in her duty. Her movements fluent and deadly, her strength admirable

Buffy.

She belonged to the dark streets as did he and yet he'd refused to believe this a long time ago.

He'd left her so many years ago, sacrificed everything he ever wanted, ever dreamed of for her, to give her the chance of as much normality as possible. And had never left her completely. She'd never been out of his mind or his protection. Silently he'd kept contact with Giles as long as Buffy had been on active duty. Retired at the age of 40 she'd been the oldest slayer in history and part of her success had been Angel's backup when needed.

He'd danced at her wedding with Riley when she was 25, he'd held her in his arms when they were divorced five years later. She'd remarried at the age of 33. Brian had been a nice guy, but had been killed in Buffy's last year as a slayer, leaving her with three children, two from her marriage with Riley, one with Brian. Daniel, Moira and Faith, all of them beautiful, intelligent and not his!

After she'd retired from slaying the PTB had summoned Angel to Europe. His strength was needed somewhere else. And inwardly he was glad. To be near her and to not be allowed to be *near* her was a torture that outweighed everything he'd ever experienced in his long un-life. To see her with other men, to see her carrying other men's children. So he actually welcomed the change, he'd spent 40 years away from America, spending his time between England, Italy and France. He'd even set foot into Romania for a short time. Enough time to remove the clause from his curse, but too late for her.

And now he was back. Back because Buffy wanted it that way. Because she had summoned him.

Suppressing the urge to shuffle his feet on the ground he looked at the wooden door in front of him. Taking a deep unnecessary breath he reached out and knocked. After a moment he heard a sound and then the door opened. She had grown old, her body fragile, her hair white, her face wrinkled, the hands callused and freckled and now she smiled.

"Angel." The smile was genuine and surprised at the same time as if she couldn't believe he'd come.

"Willow," the vampire smiled back. "It's ... well, I suppose it is good to see you," he looked a bit sheepishly.

She gestured with her hand, "Don't fuss. I'm old and fragile, but I'm so glad to see you. Come in." She moved aside to let him in and showed him into her living-room. "Can I get you anything? I've made myself some tea, you want a cup."

More because he felt obliged to he nodded. So she went into the kitchen and returned with a mug in her hand only seconds later. For her eighty years Willow was still very mobile. And her eyes still held that slightly innocent expression. It was something that drew others towards her.

"Now," she said after a moment, "sit down." She handed him the steaming mug and looked at him. "I wasn't sure you'd come."

"I," he cleared his throat and began again, "I wasn't sure either. I ... I'm still not sure I can go through it."

"I know," she nodded and blinked to keep the welling tears from falling. "It's hard for me too." When she saw him nod she continued, "They're all gone now. It's only me who's left. It's getting lonely."

"Willow..."

"No," she raised a hand, "Don't pity me. It's what happens when you're getting old. I should've gotten used to it, but somehow," she sighed. "I've been around death a lot, that's for certain, but it seems you get never used to it. Especially when it affects friends."

"No, you never get used to it," Angel affirmed. He knew what she was going through. He'd lived with it since the moment the gypsies had restored his soul. He'd seen people come and go, birth and death, the circle of life. Something natural and normal. He knew it was him who was far from the norm, but it didn't keep him from missing people he'd known, he'd grown fond of.

"Giles we expected to go before us," she began almost talking to herself. "He was after all over 20 years our senior, but it hurt. Oh, it hurt. I was over 40 at that time, but I suddenly felt lost. I know he was mostly Buffy's mentor, but we all, the whole gang didn't have the best of homes and we ... we just relied on him. Suddenly he was gone. I'm only glad Buffy was retired by then. You both were just great when Brian was killed. Without you," she shook her head, "I don't know if she'd have made it through all this."

Then she suddenly looked him in the eye, "She loved Brian, you know. More than she loved Riley," she had to laugh at that, "much more. But ... there was always a part of her they couldn't reach. Her men, I mean. She had two lovers after she was retired, did you know that?," then shaking her head at this stupid question she said, "of course you'd know that."

"Yes, I did," he replied quietly.

"Yeah," she breathed and sipped at her coffee. "She made the best of her life. Without you I mean."

"Willow, I..."

"No, I'm not blaming you or her. If someone's to blame it's Faith. It really sucked regarding you two."

He had to smile at her teenage expression. It didn't fit the old, elegant woman sitting opposite to him, and yet it fitted perfectly.

"When Xander died," she continued the subject she'd started earlier, "Well, it was hard. Dying of cancer at the age of 50. It was too early," she sighed again, "but then that's the way life goes, doesn't it. Then Anya shortly after him." She suddenly frowned, "Did I ever tell you that we never found her body, I still suspect that she contacted D'hoffren and returned to her vengeance business." She had to grin at that and Angel couldn't help but smile.

She shrugged, "If they'd had children then maybe I would think she'd really died, but so..., never mind." Suddenly her eyes watered, "and then Oz," she sniffed. "It's almost twenty years now, but still." Frowning she gazed at him, "I shouldn't complain. At least I had more than 40 wonderful years with him. That's more than most people get. When he died I shortly considered joining him, you know."

"Willow," Angel gave her a sympathetic look

"Don't tell me you didn't think about suicide? I wouldn't believe it, because I know you." Seeing his sheepish smile she nodded. "Exactly what I thought. But we can't just go and take our lives, there's still too much to do." She sighed again. "And then Cordelia."

At the mention of the brunette's name she saw grief flicker over Angel's features. After he'd left America he'd kept the closest contact with her. She'd died aged 70 together with her husband Wesley being attacked by a bunch of demons. They weren't in the demon business anymore, they'd just been in the wrong place at the wrong time. A dark alley after a visit to the opera. At least it had been a quick and almost painless death with the demons snapping their necks in an instant. Their two daughters were living in Australia now, both happily married and having their own children there. Angel had never contacted them, too frightened to endanger them. He didn't want any vampire or demon to get attracted to someone he would care about.

"But somehow," the witch said with a sigh, "I always thought Buffy would stay with me. And now," again tears welled up in her eyes. They weren't the same than before when she'd spoken of Oz, they were more intense, there was more grief behind them, because the loss was fresh. "But to lose both of them, actually all three because of a plane crash," now she couldn't stop the tears any more. They were streaking down her pale cheeks.

Angel's face wore a stoic expression, he'd already wept all his tears. They weren't any left. All that the former red-head saw was the deep grief in his dark eyes, he'd lost the only thing that really mattered to him. The only person that ever touched his soul enough to lose it.

"I'm sorry," Willow said after a while and wiped her face. "I just miss her so."

"I do too," Angel's voice cracked and he cleared his throat. "I got the clause removed," he added after a moment.

"Oh," the witch looked at him understandingly. "Oh, Angel, I'm so sorry."

His response was surprisingly a smile, "You're the only person whose able to understand that," he said. "When I told Gunn," he shrugged, "he just said something like, hey man, now you can shag."

"He never saw you and Buffy together," she reminded him and he nodded. Clearing her throat she continued, "To lose Buffy, Faith and Tim, Faith's husband, altogether," she shook her head.

Faith had been Buffy's youngest daughter, born when her mother was 36. Named after the other slayer who gave her life by protecting her mother, she had been a beautiful young girl and a happily married wife with a daughter, who had to be almost 16 by now

Angel frowned and looked at the witch, "And the girl? I mean, Buffy's grand-daughter, what happened to her?"

The witch eyed him for a long moment and then slowly said, "She is the reason you were summoned, Angel. You are meant to take care of her."

Part 2

"I what?" the vampire couldn't anything but stare at her incredulously. Then he suddenly jumped up and began to pace the room. "You can't be serious about this. Besides that I have no idea how to take care of a teenager, the girl doesn't even know me." He stopped and stared at the witch again.

"I'm sorry I blurted it out like that," she replied a bit sheepishly. "It wasn't meant to come out that way."

"Oh, that's a relief," he shot back, rolling his eyes and throwing his hands into the air. "And it changes everything of course." He had to laugh, but it didn't sound happy. Nice trap, Willow, really nice trap, he thought.

"Angel," she looked at him pleadingly, "I wanted to wait until ... until after the memorial service tomorrow night. Anne will be there too, her name is Anne by the way."

He ran a hand over his face and then gazed at her through narrowed eyes: "But you knew it from the start."

"Yes," she admitted. "Buffy, well, she left a letter." Seeing his eyes, she raised a hand. "No, it's not what you think. She wrote it six years ago in case anything should ever happen to her or Anne's parents." She took a deep breath, "She wrote it the moment she heard that Anne will become a slayer."

"What?" his voice was barely a whisper. "She's a slayer? Buffy's grand-daughter is a slayer?"

"Not yet," Willow shook her head. "She hasn't been called yet, but," she sighed, sure that he wouldn't like her next words. "She'll be called soon."

"How do you know?" his eyes narrowed even more.

"I, well," she gazed down at her folded hands and then back at him, "let's just say I've developed some skills in the witch-department since your last visit."

"So you decided to take a quick view into the future?" He shook his head in disbelief.

"I did," she admitted. "I know, I know it's not a good idea, but now it's done. I did it for Buffy. When we knew Anne would be the slayer she wanted to know. And so I ... tried to help her. After that she wrote the letter. It's addressed to you, but I know the basic contents. At least everything that's about Anne."

Suddenly feeling very weak Angel sat down again. Leaning his head back, his eyes closed he said, "Where is it?"

"What?"

"The letter?"

"Oh," Willow stood up with almost youthful grace. "I've taken care of it. Do you want to read it now?"

"Yes," he nodded opening his eyes again. "I really would like to."

"Okay."

As soon as she'd left the room, Angel's thought began to race. This was madness, sheer madness. And he'd thought falling in love with a slayer was bad, but this was so much worse. Now he was meant to take care of another slayer and it was Buffy's grand-child by all means. He couldn't do it. He simply couldn't and yet knew that he would because Buffy wanted him to do it. He'd never been able to not give in to her wishes. For her he'd even been able to pretend being Angelus again.

He didn't want to do this. How would the girl look ?. Would she have Buffy's mouth, her eyes? Or would she have no resemblance at all? That would be the best he decided. Just to think he would have to live with a daily reminder of his love. The thought was pure agony. But maybe it was another plot the PTB had cooked up for him. Making amends, he snorted inwardly, to be an ensouled vampire really sucked.

He looked up when he saw Willow coming back into the room, holding the letter in her hand. "I'm leaving you alone with it. It's late anyway." She smiled. "I've made you a bed in the basement. Just go down the stairs. There's little fridge down there with blood stored." Seeing his puzzled gaze she grinned, "Spike's staying here from time to time."

"Spike," he echoed baffled. "How is he?" he asked almost against his will.

"Well." She shrugged. "He's Spike. He can take care of himself. He even found Dru and kicked her ass." She had to laugh, "Their love wasn't that eternal after all."

"Yeah," Angel replied but his eyes were focused on the letter.

"Oh," she handed it over. "Sleep tight, Angel. See you in the morning. This house is vampire proof, I will keep the blinds shut. I'm used to it, Spike and all." She shrugged again and then left the room.

Angel sat for a while, staring at the folded paper in his hands. Words from Buffy, he thought. Words she had for him. Blinking rapidly to prevent the tears from falling he unfolded the letter and began to read.

**

My beloved Angel,

When you read this letter I will be gone. And now I'm stuck. I don't know how to continue. How does a 74 year old ex-slayer write a last letter to her vampiric ex-lover. No you aren't my ex-lover although you technically are. You were and are the true love of my life. Fate was against us, but we had some wonderful moments and I've cherished those memories my whole life.

Shortly before he died Giles told me that he always admired you for the strength to let me go and live. I've never thanked you for it, but I do now. When you left I was so hurt and angry, that I couldn't understand, but I can now. I knew what you gave up, because there was nothing to fill the gap I left in your life. I had a life before me. Granted, it wasn't the average life of the average American woman, but still there was one.

It was a fault to marry Riley. But you already know that, you were there. I can't even begin to imagine what it cost you to stay near me, see me marrying other men, dating other men, making love to them or carrying their children. At the beginning I didn't even care. I thought it was your own fault and maybe to hurt you I married Riley. It was a complete disaster, but I'm glad he gave me two children. Two children I loved, two children who are dead now. I don't even know if you heard about it. They died in a car accident - together. They were on their way to see their dying father. When it happened I understood for the first time what it meant for you to always stay behind the ones you love

No mother should have to bury her children. It's the most horrible thing one can imagine. For that I'm glad now that my mother died so early. With my job as the slayer she might have gone through the same. She must have been scared to death night after night when I went out hunting demons.

Brian wasn't a fault. I loved him. I really did. As far as it was possible for the fact that he wasn't you. There's a place deep inside of me that has only been touched once. Sometimes I think you weren't the only one to lose his soul that night. Maybe we lost them in each other. I like to think that way, because it comforts me. I don't know if you understand it, but I hope you do. **

Angel put the letter down for a moment and closed his eyes. He had given up to keep the tears from falling. 40 years away from her and he still loved her like he did the first moment he saw her. She was dead now and yet alive in every cell of his body. He had to take some deep breaths to steady himself, to prevent himself from cracking with all the emotions rushing onto him. Slowly he lowered his head again to continue reading.

**

But enough with all this. There's something I have to ask of you. Maybe it's too much, but there isn't anyone else. Willow's getting old and Faith, well, she's a wonderful daughter, but has inherited a bit too much from her Granny. She's too much like my mom to be of any help. And I SO do not trust Spike. He never got his chip removed do you know and he even tried to tell me he loved me. Imagine me laughing right now. He's certainly the most fucked up vampire I've ever met. Sorry, for the language, my daughter would have a fit at that.

But there's Anne. She's Faith's daughter, my grand-child. I really have a grand-child. It's so amazing. It's real miracle. She's wonderful and smart and sometimes a real pain in the ass, just a teenager. She isn't even 12 yet. I wish for her always to be happy, but it won't be that way. The thing I've always feared for my daughters has now happened to my beloved grand-daughter. No, not yet, but she's going to be a slayer. On her 18th birthday she's to be called. Willow helped me to find it out. Don't ask, just accept it. We know it.

And here's my request. I'm old and though I'm healthy and in good shape for my age I won't last forever. I'm human after all. If anything should happen to me, anything. Take care of her. She'll need someone to look out for her. I know you will say now, that she'll have her watcher and that is true, but do we know what he'll be like. Giles was pure luck, he was a wonderful man and I could trust him with my life, but we both know that most of them aren't like this. Imagine he's some stiff Brit who only knows the slayer -handbook. Some type like Wesley in the beginning. She wouldn't obey. She's too much like her Granny and as a result she would be killed, because she'd be the slayer nevertheless and all the demons will go after her.

You were the reason I outlived my slayer-duties. We both know it. Because I had your backup and your love. She will need you. Maybe she won't be nice to you at the beginning. I never told her about you, because I wanted her to keep her youth as long as possible. I didn't tell Faith either. She was too small to remember you and so we never talked about it. After I was retired I didn't see a reason to scare her, although I took care my children always wore crosses around their necks.

Willow promised - if she should outlive me - to help you with Anne. She'll do her best to make her understand. Don't be afraid, Angel. You will like her. Who couldn't. She's just lovely. And when she grows up she'll be beautiful. Well, you will see her soon and know yourself. Please keep her safe for me.

One last thing. When I look or looked at my children there was only one regret. That they weren't yours as well. I would have given the world to have a child with you. But I will never regret that I love you. This love is something most people never find. At least I don't know any. I know, Willow loves Oz, but it's different. Maybe because it wasn't forbidden, but maybe - and I prefer that version - because we had something very special.

I love you, my Angel.

Buffy

**

The letter slipped from the vampire's fingers, while the tears kept on falling. And he had thought there weren't any left.

After a while they stopped. Too exhausted to move Angel closed his eyes. A part of his mind realised that the blind's were closed and so he didn't fight when sleep finally overwhelmed him.

Part 3

That was the way Willow found him in the morning, sleeping on her couch. She had to smile at the view and had to sigh inwardly. He looked so handsome, so young and was yet older than she. She could clearly remember the evening in the Bronze when Buffy had described her feelings every time he was near. God, they'd been young and innocent at that time, believing this relationship had any chance to work.

It had never been a matter of love. She'd never seen two people more in love with each other. Their love had survived Angelus and Hell, two marriages, three children, other lovers and still they loved each other. That was the most amazing thing. Neither of them ever doubted the other loved him or her. It was just a fact. But they both accepted that they couldn't be together and while Angel's fate was to stay on his own, Buffy had tried to move on with her life.

And she hadn't done that badly with it. There had been times where she'd been happy, at her weddings, when her babies were born and many other occasions, but behind all this there was always a deep underlying pain. Grief for what fate had thrown upon her. Fate that denied her the man she loved more than anything. And yet there had been times when Willow had envied her. To find such a complete and utter love had to be beyond imagination.

It wasn't that Buffy was always talking about Angel. In fact she rarely did talk about him. Never with her men, never with her children, only once or twice with Willow and sometimes with Cordy when they saw each other. It didn't affect her relationship with Brian, she'd loved him and he had loved her, it was a "normal" love. Something that happened more often. Maybe the way Xander and Anya loved each other. After he'd been killed, Buffy's grief had been long and deep. He left a hole in her life, but she didn't look for another husband after him, although she was still smashing. The lovers she'd had, none of them had ever touched her deeply. Maybe she just decided it was enough pain for her.

And then her two children had died. Children, she had to laugh at that thought. They'd been both in their forties, but children were always your children no matter how old they were. Willow had asked Buffy if she didn't want to contact Angel, but her friend had only smiled and said he would always be with her. Only that moment the witch had realised how deep their love went.

"Hey," a voice startled her and she looked at Angel.

"Good Morning," she smiled. "You fell asleep I suppose."

"Yeah," he moved so that he was in a sitting position and his eyes fell on the letter that laid on the carpet. Picking it up, he gazed at Willow, "You know what's inside of this you said."

"Only the parts regarding Anne," she took a seat opposite to him. "I'm sure there are some private lines as well."

He just nodded and struggled to keep his emotions in check, "I cannot say what it means to me, to have it," his voice was hoarse.

"I understand," she smiled again.

"I..," he began, but his throat closed up. Clearing it, he tried again, "Is there ... I mean, do you have a picture of her?"

"A picture," she looked at him quizzically, "Oh you mean of Buffy. Sure, tons of them."

"No," he raised a hand when she was about to get up, "Not any picture. I would ... I want to see her. How she looked as an old woman. I've always pictured her as an old woman, with wrinkles and all," a little bit embarrassed he broke off.

An brilliant smile lightened Willow's features. "Of course," she nodded and stood. Walking over to a bookshelf she took a framed picture and handed it to Angel, "That's taken a year ago," she smiled proudly, "when my great-grandchild was baptised."

"A great-grandchild, huh?" He had to smile at that thought. But couldn't talk anymore when his eyes fell on the picture in his hand. Her face wore a brilliant smile, her eyes were shining and looking with love at the little baby in her arms. Buffy had been 79 when the picture had been taken and she'd never looked more beautiful. In awe his finger traced the lines of her body and stayed for a moment on her face. "She's beautiful," he whispered.

"Yes, she always was," Willow affirmed. "There was such a power in her. So much life...," her voice broke. "I'm sorry," she said and wiped a tear away. "I still can't believe she's gone."

"I know the feeling," he replied, his eyes still on the picture. "Could I ... I mean ... is it possible to get a copy of this."

"Of course," she took the frame again and put it back on the shelf. "I'll take it to the photoshop and they'll copy it."

"Thanks," he just said. After a moment of silence he changed the subject, "Where will the memorial service be held?"

"The mansion," she replied simply and held his gaze. "She would have wanted it, you know. I'm going to get us some coffee," she said and disappeared in the kitchen.

"Yes," he whispered. Running a hand over his face, he tried to get a hold on his emotions. The mansion. That meant it still existed. A building full of memories, full of love, of pain, of forbidden passion. A vampire and a slayer in love, desperately, passionately in love. Against all odds thrown at each other by fate, but not allowed to live it, but not able to deny it either. The mansion, where she'd sent him to hell, where her love had brought him back, where she'd nursed him back to his full strength, where she'd slept in his arms, where they had laughed together, he'd comforted her, held her ... there was so much he remembered now. Almost too much.

He wasn't entirely sure if he would be able to go through with it. He'd never been there again after he'd left Sunnydale. And now he would be going there again to say good bye to Buffy.

"There we are," Willow entered the room with a tray loaded with coffee and a doughnut for her and interrupted the train of his thoughts.

"Who will be there? Will I know anyone but you?," Angel wanted to know.

"I don't think so. My daughter will come tonight, she's Buffy's god-child. You remember Alicia?"

"Yes," he nodded. "She was an bright teenager the last time I met her."

She had to laugh at that, "And now she's a granny herself. Thinking back it seems as though time has been racing."

"It just seems that way," Angel replied, his voice grave. "They were long years."

"Yeah," she admitted after a moment. "Especially my last without Oz." She sighed, "I miss him, but I suppose I don't have to tell you. You understand."

"Oh yes," he took his mug and sipped at his coffee. "When will I see her?"

"Anne?" Willow asked and when he nodded she watched his face for a moment. "She'll be here at noon. I phoned her last night after ... well, after I blurted everything out. Thinking about it, I suppose it wasn't that bad. Maybe it's better you'll see her before the memorial service."

The vampire looked puzzled, "Why?"

Her eyes took on a mysterious expression, "Just wait and see."

Part 4

It wasn't yet noon when the front door was opened and slammed shut in a second. Like a whirlwind, a young girl entered Willow's home. Her brown hair long and flowing, her movements flawless and very female. "Auntie Willow," she cried when she entered the living-room and stopped dead in her tracks when she saw a stranger sitting on the sofa. "Hi," she said with a sheepish smile.

Angel couldn't think and he was glad he didn't have to breathe. He had to blink at the girl standing right in front of him to clear the haze in his mind. He didn't even realize that Willow had come into the room as well.

"Anne, my darling," she greeted the girl. "I'm so glad you could come."

"Me too," she raised an eyebrow at the old woman who she loved as if she were family. "Auntie Willow, do you secretly entertain young lovers?" A wicked expression was in her eyes.

The witch playfully hit her shoulder, "Anne. You're teasing me again. This is a good friend of mine. His name is Angel. Angel this is Anne, Buffy's grand-daughter." At the mention of the ex-slayer's name the laughter left the girl's eyes and was replaced by grief. It had been four weeks since the plane-crash, but the wound from losing her parents and her grand-mother was very raw. She had to admit that she'd been closer to her grand-mother than to her parents and that her loss was hurting even more, although Willow did her best to help her through this.

She looked at the stranger who was now standing and extended a hand, "Hi, Angel."

He didn't move, only stared at her. Thousands of emotions ran through him and he knew he had to get out of there. Now. Clearing his throat he looked at Willow, "I'm sorry, I really need to feed," he said with a cracking voice and without a further glance at the girl he was down the stairs.

"Well, I'd say...," Anne turned to gaze at the stairs where he'd disappeared. "I really didn't mean it when I said he was your lover. Geez doesn't he understand a joke?"

Willow took the girl's arm and pulled her to the sofas, "Come on, my sweet, there's a lot I have to tell you." She sighed loudly, "I ... God, this is so hard."

"Auntie Willow, are you ill? Please don't tell me you're going to die. I couldn't face another...," her voice was sounding panicked.

"No, no," the witch quickly assured her. "I'm fine. It's about you and Buffy and Angel. There are lots of things you don't know. Promise you will listen and not interrupt?"

"Sure," Anne said eagerly, not really understanding what was going on, but wanting to know everything.

"Alright, my love, did you ever hear about vampires...," Willow began.

*****

Barely reaching the basement Angel sank to the floor, pulled his knees to his chest and rested his forehead on them. This was more than he could handle. He couldn't have stayed another minute in the same room. She had been old and she was dead and now she'd been standing in front of him.

The rational part of his mind knew it was Anne. But his whole being screamed Buffy. Was it another foul play of fate to make her like her grand-mother's twin, he wondered? Sure her hair was dark and longer and curlier, but the rest. She had the same body, the same face and most importantly the same eyes. Those hazel eyes he saw whenever he thought of her.

For a moment it had been as if Buffy had been walking in. Young, vibrant and so close to touch. But she wasn't Buffy, not Buffy, not her, his mind repeated again and again.

How could two beings be so alike? Buffy had only been her grand-mother, dammit. She'd only given a quarter of her genes, but obviously the ones that mattered. She even smiled like her. To see Anne like this was pure agony and pure pleasure at the same time. It was as if Buffy'd been sent back to him, he could look at her and imagine her, but that was where the pleasure stopped. Because she wasn't Buffy. She was Anne. With her own personality, her own dreams and her own life that didn't include him, well not in any other way than as her protector. And he wouldn't have it any other way. Because she wasn't Buffy.

He knew it for certain. The soul in this body was different. This was Anne.

And he had to get away from her. He knew he couldn't stand it, couldn't stand looking at her face in another person. But then his hand reached in his pocket and found the letter. He had no choice in this, as it was so often in his life. Of course he would protect her, when it came to Buffy there'd never been a choice.

*****

"Wow," Anne looked at Willow in awe and leaned back, "This is some information."

"Yeah," the witch tiredly rubbed her eyes.

"So this vampire, Angel, the one down in your basement was Granny's first," she blushed slightly, "you know."

"Yes," Willow confirmed and her lips twitched. "They loved each other very much. So very much and didn't have a chance to live it."

"Star-crossed lovers," Anne sighed loudly, then suddenly frowned, "Granny never talked about him."

"I know," Willow sighed again, "but how should she? I mean bringing him up she'd have had to explain more and frankly I think it just was too painful for her to talk about him at all." She studied the girl's face for a moment, then asked, "The fact that you're going to be the slayer doesn't give you the wiggins?"

"No," Anne shook her head, "strange isn't it. You told me Granny freaked about it, but maybe it's because he's here and he already protected her for such a long time." She shrugged, "I don't know. Wow, he really is a vampire."

Willow had to chuckle at the way she had been saying this, "You should've seen your Grandma when she found out. She was shell-shocked. He'd changed into what she called his "game-face" while they were kissing."

"Ewwww," Anne shuddered at that picture.

"It wasn't really like that," the witch gave the girl a smile. "Later we discovered that he would change automatically when his emotions ran too high. It was actually an expression of his deep feelings for her. After a while Buffy didn't mind it at all. She even once told me she kissed him deliberately. He'd always been so ashamed for what he was. With having his soul and all he resented the fact that he was a vampire at the same time."

Suddenly something dawned in Anne, "So Spike's a vampire as well. I always wondered, why he slept downstairs and never was around in Sunlight. Does he have a soul too?"

"No," came a voice from the doorway and startled them. Angel looked at the two women, "Spike's not like me."

"No, he's not like Angel," Willow affirmed. "He is still an evil vampire, but many years ago someone caught him and they planted a chip in his head. As a result he can't harm humans anymore."

"I'm sorry that I left like that before," the dark-haired vampire said ignoring the witch's words. "It just," his eyes were watery, "you're so much like her. You look like Buffy when she was young."

"I know," Anne nodded. "She showed me her pictures some time ago. I could hardly believe it. When Willow told me about ... well, about your history I understood."

Angel nodded at that and sat down on a chair and gazed at the former red-head, "Did you," he cleared his throat again, still not fully master of his emotions, "did you tell her ..."

"Yes," the witch folded her hands in her lap, "She knows that she's going to be the slayer and that you're meant to help her."

"I've actually never seen a vampire before," she frowned, "no I have. Spike. But I never guessed he was one. Grandma was very protective it seems. She never told us. Mom didn't have a clue either." Suddenly her eyes watered, "I'm sorry," she apologized quickly. "I wonder how much time it needs I can talk about them without beginning to cry."

"It's okay," Angel said softly and looked at her.

Still sniffling a bit, she gave him a shaky smile, "You have beautiful eyes," she said without warning and blushed furiously. "Sorry, I don't even know where this comes from."

He couldn't help but grin at her and he could hear Willow giggle. "I can live with it."

"Sure," she said gravely. "You've certainly heard it before."

"It came up once or twice," he joked. "I actually can't remember them. So I have to take your word for it."

"Oh yes, no reflection, Aunt Willow told me," she said knowingly. "Isn't that strange. I mean, how do you shave."

Now the witch laughed out loud, "I asked that once too."

"You did?" Anne smiled. "Yeah, well, it's an interesting question."

"Practice," Angel said and grinned. "Although I was glad when the electric razors were introduced. It's much more bloodless."

"Oh Angel," Willow said between tears, she'd laughed so hard, "I really did expect anything. But I never thought we would sit in my living-room and laugh at your jokes. It's so good to have you back."

Go to Part 5