Disclaimer: let me check ... nope, still don't own them. Sigh! I'm not making any money off this.
Rating: PG-13
Pairing: B/A (strong in this part!), and the usual pairings from the show
Distribution: my site (http://www.never-ending-love.de), Land of Denial, if you have any of my stories, take it; anybody else tell me where it goes
Timeline:  This is set into canon, in an attempt to make the whole series more B/A-friendly. Set after "Midnight Breath".
Spoilers: the whole B/A-canon to be sure, follows loosely "Midnight Angel","Midnight Whispers", "Midnight Rainbow", "Midnight Hour", "Midnight Memory", "Midnight Protector", "Midnight Letter", "Midnight Encounters", "Midnight Eyes, "Midnight Lovers", "Midnight Kiss", "Midnight Song", "Midnight Rose", "Midnight Velvet", "Midnight Sun", "Midnight Shade", "Midnight Secrets", "Midnight Star", "Midnight Dance", "Midnight Wind", "Midnight Storm", "Midnight Fire", and "Midnight Breath". You should probably read it to understand this. And you should have seen season 6/3 or at least read the transcripts (http://www.psyche.kn-bremen.de), or you won't know what they're talking about.
Summary: Buffy is still in L.A. I've set this directly after "Midnight Breath". I tried to keep this close to canon, although it's not really connected to any of the episodes. But with the changes that were necessary to bring B/A into this, I have to be a little imaginative plot-wise. You'll see...Feedback: oh yes, please
Dedication: To Ducks! Please don't let the writers ruing your imagination. We miss your fics! And you promised us SO-B5! I'm waiting impatiently!!!

"I can't believe we're really sitting here, chatting, drinking cappuccino. You know doing the friend thing. Without actually being friends of course." Cordelia gave Buffy a bright fake smile. It wasn't that she really hated Buffy, or even disliked her that much, she told herself, although she didn't like her much either. Never had.

But being the only female between males - Fred didn't really count, she was still too unreal for Cordelia's taste - had its advantages. You were always in the centre of their attention. They fussed about her, and Angel had been really concerned lately about her visions. Since Buffy had entered the stage again, however, the brunette found herself more on the floor than not in the aftermath of the Powers-sent migraines. And she didn't like it. Not one single bit.

"It's great," Fred lifted her cup and sipped, her smile thoroughly genuine. "I never liked L.A. before, but now I think it's the best place on earth."

"Yeah, and we all know why." Cordelia remarked sarcastically, thinking about Fred's crush on Angel. The Slayer hadn't noticed it so far, but the brunette could hardly wait for the moment she did. Sure, recently Fred seemed to favour Wesley, but the brunette wasn't able to take it seriously. Who on earth would go for Wes?

"Oh. Do we?" Buffy tilted her head. "And why is that?"

"Well," Fred smiled at the Slayer, completely oblivious to the meaning of Cordelia's words. "I don't know how much Angel told you. But I was ... by accident ... transported into another dimension..."

"Seems to happen a lot these days," Buffy muttered under her breath.

Fred shot her a bewildered look, but went on, "Uh ... yes ... It was ... humans were called cows and treated that way. It wasn't fun."

"Oh, I thought it wasn't that bad," Cordy threw in casually, sipping again from her cappuccino.

"Only because you were a princess there."

"You were ... what?," the Slayer asked incredulously, a glimpse of humor entering her eyes.

"She was a princess," Fred was eager to tell. "Because of her visions they thought she was some kind of messiah for them. She seemed to like it."

"Oh," Buffy raised a brow, grinned, "I can imagine that. Queen C after all."

"Huh?" Again Fred didn't get it.

Cordelia on the other hand glared at the blond. "Very funny. Being Royalty is not just fun, you know. It comes with a lot of responsibility."

"Yeah, I'll bet," Buffy chuckled.

"So ... uh ... Do you like Connor?," Fred wanted to know.

"Yeah," the Slayer replied, smiling at the baby who was sleeping on the chair beside her in his carrier. "He's so sweet."

Cordelia scoffed slightly, gazing at the baby as well. It had been Angel's idea that the girls should take him when they had decided to leave for a cup of coffee. He could use some sun, Angel had said. And the brunette had to admit that she was a bit miffed Angel had asked Buffy and not her to take the baby.

She knew inwardly that it was ridiculous feeling that way. Buffy was Angel's girlfriend. And it was only logical that while she was in L.A. she would tend to the baby. But during her absence Cordelia had liked fussing over Connor. Did Angel think Buffy could do it any better?

Damn. Now she was doing it again. Which proved that she desperately needed a life beside the agency. But it wasn't always easy to keep a boyfriend if a vision hit right in the middle of a passionate kiss.

"Isn't he?," Fred beamed. "He's such a cute little boy. He looks just like Angel."

"And that equals cute." Cordelia rolled her eyes, "God, I can't believe it. What is the matter with that man. Why do all females swoon the moment he is near? Muses, vampires, Slayers, Fred ...," she shook her head. Not that she didn't think he was cute. Because he was. Just a little bit too dead for her taste. On the other hand ...

She tilted her head, eyed Buffy speculatively. The Slayer didn't seem to mind it. And her job was to kill vampires. She should hate them by nature. Yet, from the very start, it had been different with Angel. Buffy had been drawn to him almost from the first second. Cordelia could clearly remember her jealousy, her possessiveness. But Angel didn't seem to mind it. On the contrary, sometimes he was even worse than the blond.

"Muses?," Buffy asked, looking from Cordelia to Fred, then back.

But the brunette made a dismissive gesture with her hand, "Never mind. Forget I said that. So you like Connor, huh? I have to admit I'm surprised. I expected you to dislike him from the start. With him being Darla's son and all. Isn't it difficult to have another woman's baby around. To always be reminded that he ... well, did it with her?"

"But he was really depressed then and I can relate, because you tend to do strange things if you don't quite feel like yourself. A-and ...," Fred trailed off, seeing Cordelia glare at her, then shrugged, "That's what Wesley told me." She looked at Buffy with a smile, "That Angel had a really bad time."

The Slayer smiled back, "I know. And to answer your question," she turned towards Cordelia, "No, I don't think about Darla. Actually, I tend to forget her completely. Connor is ... Connor. Not Darla's son, or ... He's just Connor. And he's cute. And sweet. And ...," she broke off, feeling sudden tears well up in her eyes, "... when Angel holds him ... God, I'm sorry," she apologized wiping a slipping tear away. "I suppose it's hormones."

Feeling suddenly like a bad person, Cordy reached over the table, put a hand on the Slayer's, "Hey, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to..."

But Buffy shook her head, "It's okay." She took a deep breath, wiped the tears away, "I tend to cry at the most impossible times. It has to be hormones. Or at least I hope, because otherwise," she rolled her eyes, laughed through the tears, "It's *so* not like me. I hate this." She gave Fred an apologetic smile, "I usually don't do this." "Oh ... don't worry, it's okay," Fred gave her a bright smile, "It must be wonderful to expect a baby, by the man you love and who ... loves you. I mean, that has to be ... incredible."

"It is." The blond chuckled, "Especially if you didn't think it was even possible."

"Talking about possible," Cordelia cut in, "Do you know by now how ... uh ... you know," she gestured at Buffy's slightly swollen abdomen.

"No." Leaning back in her chair, Buffy shook her head, "Wesley doesn't seem to have a clue so far. I even talked to Giles on the phone and he hasn't found anything either." She shrugged, "But then ... Angel's special in so many ways, why not in this, too?"

"Yes, why not," Fred agreed, smiling.

Inwardly rolling her eyes over the other woman, Cordelia looked at Buffy, "How is Giles, by the way. I couldn't believe he left."

"Me neither," the blond sighed, "But he said I needed to be on my own. That I had to learn not to rely on someone."

"Who is Giles?," Fred asked.

"He is ... or rather, was, my watcher. Uh ... do you even know anything about Slayers?"

"Yes. Well, not an awful lot," Fred admitted, smiling sheepishly, "I know they fight vampires. Evil vampires that is. And that there's a watcher who is meant to guide them, help them."

"Help them," Buffy scoffed, "Yeah. That's what I thought. But all of a sudden he left. Okay, so I died and all, but then I was back and he still left for England. What does England have we don't, I wonder."

"Bad weather and food?," Cordelia said, then amended, "But maybe he's got some lady-friend there."

The blond frowned, "Olivia is in England."

"Olivia?" The brunette leaned forward, sudden interest sketched on her face.

"Yeah. She's his girlfriend. Kind of. I think she's quiet a bit younger." Buffy grimaced, "I actually found her in Giles' house one morning. Only dressed in his shirt."

"Ewww," Cordelia exclaimed in disgust. "Not that I'm still a teenager and have problems with sex, but ... Giles is so ... English. I have problems thinking about Wes and sex all the time. I always imagine him asking the lady if he may be allowed to take his pants off."

Buffy and Cordelia laughed at that, but Fred didn't think it was funny, "Wesley is very nice," she protested. "And he isn't stiff. Not at all. He," she stopped, thinking about the way he'd cried behind the closed door after he'd been possessed and threatened her. Nothing had happened, but Wesley had been deeply shaken. "He's really nice," she repeated.

"He is," Cordy leaned over the table, patted the other woman's hand, "Don't mind me saying such things. I like Wesley. He's my friend. We're just kidding."

"Oh ...," Fred's face brightened, "Okay."

"No, he isn't stiff," Buffy agreed. "I'm still getting used to this new Wes. When he first came to Sunnydale, he was ... well, let's not go there." When she saw Fred looking at her quizzically, she explained, "He was my watcher for a short while. We ... had a blow up ... well, kind of. After that he left town. And given the circumstances of our blow up the last place I'd expected him was to work with Angel." She chuckled slightly to herself, not caring that Fred wouldn't understand what she was talking about.

"Alright," Cordelia gulped down the rest of her coffee, then raised her hand to sign the waitress. "I think it's time to go back. The guys should be done by now."

"Done?," Buffy raised a brow.

"Uh-huh," Fred grinned at the Slayer. "It's a secret. You'll see."

The blonde's eyes turned speculatively, but Cordelia shook her head, "No way. We're not telling you. You'll see when we get there."

Buffy stuck out her lower lip in a pout but realising that she couldn't impress Cordelia the way she could do it with Angel, she just sighed and reached for Connor's carrier.

*

Three human girls were caring for the child. It was interesting. He'd seen the other two before, but the blond was new. She was pretty. Tiny. He thought about his daughter. She'd been tiny as well. And so sweet. So innocent.

But something wasn't right about the girl. She was different. There was an air around her, the way she carried herself, the way she looked at people. There was a strength in her, he couldn't touch but still feel. Who was she, he wondered? And why hadn't she been there before?

For a moment, for a short insane moment, he'd even believed it was Darla coming back from death, giving him the opportunity to fulfill what he had come for. But then the girl had turned and he had known. She wasn't Darla.

She was obviously pregnant. Not far along, but far enough to show. Who was the father of that child? Was she one of Angelus' cases?

For the last weeks he'd done nothing but learn. He'd gone out, listened to people, tried to get to know as much as possible about his target. And what he'd learned had given him a deep satisfaction. It was true. Angelus had been cursed with his soul. And that opened a whole new field of possibilities.

When he'd come here after two centuries he'd come to kill Darla and Angelus. Unfortunately Darla had taken it from him, by staking herself. It was a pity, but it couldn't be helped. But the fact that Angelus had a soul now made it possible for him to feel, to suffer. If someone he loved was hurt he would feel it. His revenge would be much for satisfying that way.

He looked at the girls walking away from the coffee back towards the hotel, the blond carrying the child in her arms now, while one of the others had the carrier. He had to learn more about the blond girl. She was an unknown player in the game, and he had never liked those.

Smiling slightly to himself, Holtz turned around and left.

*

It was a strange feeling walking behind Cordelia and Fred, carrying Angel's son in her arms, Buffy thought. The sun was shining, bathing them in warmth. But there were shadows too, the way it was supposed to be at late afternoon.

Somehow, Buffy mused, it was a bit like her life at the moment. Since she'd come to L.A. with Angel last night she had managed to forget about Spike and the things that had happened only a few days ago in Sunnydale. But now they were hitting her full force all of a sudden. She tried to force them down, but it was in vain.

Not that it really surprised her. She could still feel Spike touching her, kissing her. And she could feel herself respond. No. Not just respond. She'd been the one who initiated the kiss, who ...

She shuddered slightly thinking about it. She had been ready to give in. To finally let him have what he wanted to. And to make herself feel. It had been Angel who had held her upright since the day Willow had brought her back. But seeing Darla in L.A., seeing Angel care for her and the baby she carried, had been too much. She might have been able to deal with it, understand what had happened, had she been stronger. But not then. Not while she was still trying to adjust to her new life.

Something had shattered inside of her, seeing Darla's stomach swollen with Angel's child. And that moment she'd thought she would never be whole again.

Surprisingly she had been wrong. The horrible night when she'd been ready to let Spike finally have what he'd always wanted, when Angel had come to Sunnydale to save her from herself, it had changed everything. She didn't kid herself. She wasn't back on track, yet. But she felt better, more like the old Buffy she'd known than she had for a long time.

Angel would never know how grateful she was that he'd stepped in when she had been about to make the worst mistake of her life. She didn't know if she would still be able to look at herself if she had gone through with it. Not to forget the fact that  it would have given Spike the upper hand - reaching his ultimate goal.

Fucking a Slayer. Fucking Buffy.

He obviously wasn't able to kill her, whatever the reason. He could have, that night, when she'd kissed him, she hadn't been paying attention, but he hadn't. Was it a new mind game, she wondered? Or was he really that twisted? Idiotic question, Summers, she scolded herself inwardly. Of course he is twisted, he is a vampire. And he doesn't have a soul.

And today walking down the streets of L.A., enjoying the rays of the late afternoon sun, it suddenly felt unreal. Ever since Angel had brought her back, she'd been nothing but Buffy. She'd done normal things, like having breakfast in bed, prepared by Angel who had surprised her with his cooking skills. Then going shopping and finally having coffee with Cordelia and Fred.

Buffy couldn't remember when she had enjoyed herself that much. Was this a reason she'd been so weary and ready to let go with Glory? Because somewhere on the way she'd lost herself, the girl, the woman she was underneath the whole Slayer-front. Yes, she was the Slayer, and after so many years she had finally accepted it.

But she was still only twenty years old, still a girl, even she struggled hard to grow up, had been forced to grow up faster than others, but only when her mother died she had really started to see what growing up meant. She'd been responsible for so many things then. And although Angel was there, and although she loved him so very much, it had been so tempting to let go. To make the pain stop.

She started slightly when Cordelia and Fred suddenly stopped in front of the Hyperion. "What's the matter?," she asked, frowning slightly, "Why don't you two just go in?"

"Because you are meant to go in first," Cordy grinned at her, then gave her a slight shove. "Go on," she nudged.

Not quite knowing what to expect, Buffy cautiously opened the door, only to stop dead in tracks. Her eyes widened and she heard herself draw in a sharp breath. "Oh my God," she breathed in awe, not able to believe what she saw. "What's this?"

The whole lobby of the hotel was decorated with flowers and candles. There was a huge table standing in the middle, laid out for eight. Soft music was playing in the background, and the smell of freshly cooked food was in the air.

"Welcome back, my love."

She turned her head and saw Angel coming down the stairs. He was wearing her favourite burgundy red button-down shirt, and black trousers. With a smile and a kiss he greeted her, then took Connor from her shoulders, placing him on his.

"Wha- what...," she could only stammer, feeling completely overwhelmed.

"We're going to have dinner," he explained, taking her hand, pulling her with him. "I thought it was time."

"Time?" She had not the slightest idea what he was talking about. What was going on?

"Yeah, time," he said softly, looking at her, giving Fred a quick smile when she took Connor from him, carrying the baby away to his own bed. "You've come back to us. Back into our lives," he went on, cupping her cheek with one hand, "And you were never properly welcomed."

Buffy felt something shift around her heart she couldn't name. There was a warmth spreading through her, she had missed for a long time. Her tears were welling up so fast, she wasn't able to stop them, and her voice sounded oddly thick, when she finally managed to talk. "Oh, Angel."

"I love you," he said then, pulling her to him, wrapping her up in his arms, making her feeling even warmer. He was a vampire, he was cold, but only he could make her feel warm. And like this, Spike's image that had haunted her for days disappeared. Now, here, in Angel's arms, surrounded by his warmth, it didn't scare her anymore.

*

"Angel sent Gunn to bring us to L.A.," Dawn told her older sister two hours later. They were standing in the lobby after the wonderful dinner, having a drink, just talking to each other. To Buffy's surprise and joy Gunn had brought her sister and her best friend to join them for dinner, and Dawn couldn't stop talking about it, while smiling brightly at the African-American. There was a look in her eyes that made Buffy inwardly roll hers. She could already see the next crush coming on.

Suddenly recalling what her sister had just said, Buffy frowned slightly, "He did?"

"Yes, he did," came a voice from behind her, and she sighed when strong arms wrapped around her waist from behind. "Knowing that you'd never be able to completely relax without knowing they were safe and sound, I thought the easiest way was to bring them along, too. I asked Xander and Anya, too. But they had plans of their own."

"Did I tell you lately how much I love you?" The blond turned her head slightly to look up at him.

"Yeah, but don't hold back."

"I'm so happy for you,"  Willow's smile was a bit wobbly, and she fighting tears, and Buffy knew without a doubt that she was thinking about Tara that very moment, and she wondered if they would find a way to get back together. Willow seemed determined to get the magick back under control. Buffy could only hope she would succeed.

The Slayer looked around at her friends and Angel's, then snuggled deeper into her lover's embrace, his hand resting comfortable over their child, while Connor was sleeping happily in a corner of the lobby, completely undisturbed by the noises around him. Buffy knew from experience that this wouldn't last. This evening was nothing more than a break. Tomorrow real life would intrude again. They were warriors and the fight of good and evil wasn't over yet. Maybe would never. But tonight she felt safe and secure and she knew without a doubt there was not place on earth she'd rather be than in Angel's arms.

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