In Another's Eyes

by Kathyrn

Rating: g, just a bit of fluff
Disclaimer: as usual nothing recognizable belongs to me, rather to Joss, Mutant Enemy et al. While the lyrics to another's eyes belong to Trisha Yearwood, Garth Brooks, John Peppard and Bobby Wood
Distribution: Ask and you shall receive.
Note: this CD was bought as a present and when I heard this song today it inspired me, please wait till the end till you flame me there's a bit of B/R at the beginning but it all works out in the end. note this was not beta'ed in any way so please excuse any mistakes, I wanted to get it posted.
Dedication: to all those who are distressed about the spoilers floating about in hope this helps and to Cat for her ability to keep surprising me.


"Willow, don't you have a half decent CD in this car, I know you miss Oz, but believe me when I say that 23 Greatest love songs of all time are not going to help you move on" Buffy groaned tossing the offending CD into the back seat. "oh I like this one, it's from that movie with the convicts and plane called umm"

"Surprisingly it was called ConAir, and I am allowed to mope, yeesh I let you mope over Angel, and now look at you you've moved on" Willow babbled as she pushed the Trisha Yearwood CD into the portable CD player in the car.

Buffy slouched further into her seat at the mention of her love, her eyes filling with tears at the thought of him, standing in the smoke and haze after graduation leaving her, his break up flowing through her mind

"I want my life to be with you"

"I don't"

No she wouldn't think about him, thinking hurt to much and didn't help, thinking left Angel in LA and her still in Sunnydale alone. Yes it was much better to try and forget, he obviously had in all the time he had been gone, they had only had contact once, at Thanksgiving and he had even bothered to see her. much better she reminded herself, to do what everyone was telling her to try and find someone new, someone dependable, like Riley.

So what if he didn't make her heart sing at the thought of him, or her knees didn't buckle every time she saw him, that her skin had begun to crawl at his touch. You couldn't expect that from every relationship she justified to herself, just because you shared it with Angel didn't mean that you had it everyone. She could live without, yes she would, simply because he was here, and that counted for something.

Buffy was jerked out of her reverie by Willow's tuneless singing, thankful when the song ended and another began, she was particularly thankful when Will announced that she didn't know the words to this one, thus saving her from another massacre of an innocent song. She was soon lost in the beautiful words

In another's eyes I'm someone who loves her enough to walk away from you,
I'd never cheat, I'd never lie, in another's eyes
In another's eyes I can do no wrong he believes in me and his faith is strong,
I'd never fall or even compromise, in another's eyes
In another's eyes I'm afraid that I can't see this picture perfect portrait that they paint of me.
They don't realize and I pray they never do 'cause every time I look I'm seeing you in another's eye's.

She didn't even register the tears that were pouring down her face, nor the fact that Will had pulled over, "Buffy what's wrong?"

"Will, I can't do it anymore, I can't pretend I'm fine when I not. I smile for you and Xander and laugh at his stupid jokes but all the time I'm dying inside, I'm so empty Will since he left, it's like I will never be happy again or even just content without him I'm being eaten away by loneliness. I did what you all told me to" she gulped in between sobs "You, Giles, Xander even Angel all told me to look elsewhere and I did and found Riley, and I tried to like him, but I couldn't even do that let alone love him, every time he kisses me I think of Angel's lips on mine, every touch is replaced by Angel's smooth hands Willow. it's not fair, I deserve better, god knows Riley deserves better than someone using him as a substitute cause her lover left her."

"Buffy, I never knew, I thought you had gotten over it, well most of the time. If you feel like this your right it's not fair, you deserve so much more than simply settling" Willow cried.

"Will, I am so glad cause I must admit I was getting a bit annoyed at everyone telling me to get over it, thank you for understanding me again, it's been a while. And seeing you understand I need a favor can you drive me to Riley's I think I need to share this revelation with him as well." Buffy smiled at her friend, the first true smile in months.

"I just don't get it Buffy, I thought you were happy with me, with us, where is this coming from?" Riley cried his face distorted with pain, "You know I love you what's the problem"

"The problem is I don't love you, I am sorry, when I see you my mind replaces your face with Angel's , your kiss to me is Angel's, your touch a pale imitation. I don't want to hurt you, you have been so supportive but you deserve better than a girl who has no love left to share, a girl who constantly thinks of another when she is with you. You deserve better and so do I." Buffy finished as she kissed him on the cheek, "let me know if you want us to do the friend thing, if you don't I do understand" Knowing that friends is all they could ever be, she needed spark in her laugh and only one undead guy could do it for her.

A pounding at his door brought him out of a deep sleep, a peaceful place, where he and Buffy remained together and walked in the sunlight, as he yanked open the door and sighted the object of his dreams before his only thought was that if he dreamed of the clause being gone would that occur as well.

"Would you like me to tell you what I am doing here?" his beloved asked in a defiant tone "well you know what I don't care if you don't want to know. I have had it Angel, you know it took a song to make me look at my life and I hated what I saw. I had stopped living and started settling because everyone, you included told me it was all I could have, dammit I'm the slayer I fight everything else in life so I decided to fight for my happiness. And let me tell you, I can't be happy without you Angel, you are my everything, the great life I was supposed to have when you left is horrible, I'm so empty so lonely and I can see only one way to fix it."

"And how may I ask is that" he cautiously asked as she crawled into his lap, placing light kisses along his jaw, sighing as his arms unconsciously tightened around her.

"With you, I love you Angel, simple as that, if you love me we can make it work, if you don't than I'm gone I don't want to live without you but if you don't love me anymore I will and I'll be fine, eventually."

Angel tilted her chin up, ensuring her eyes locked with his "you don't play fair Ms. Summers, you know I will love you till the end of time and beyond, I told you always once and that's the truth. I missed you so much, I agree we will work it out, but we will work it out together"

"I love you too Always" she replied snuggling further into his embrace feeling as though she had come home. Finally

The End

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