Rating: If you can watch the show you can read this
Spoilers: None really, this is my universe and Riley, Kate and the slightly scary Jheria don't exsist here.
Disclaimer: None of the charcters from BtVS or Angel, belong to me in any way, rather they belong to Joss Whedon, WB, Fox and probably others too, they are currently being borrowed for some non-money making fun.
Dedication: To Freda who requested some fluff, this is the best I could do with a cold. Also to Janice, whose challenge will be used later into the story. Finally also for Cat who is currently taking a leave of absence and is very missed.
Feedback: I'm not too proud to beg, I would love some to help me through this cold.
Author's Note : this is still in my universe, of Baby Mine and Chicken pops and fairies but I think it can be read as an independent story. It's all un-beta'ed so please excuse any spelling or grammatical errors.

Sunnydale

The sight that greeted Angel as he walked into his bedroom made his long dead heart race, his beloved was curled up on their bed her hands stretched around her enlarged stomach, swollen with their second child, while her face was awash with tears.

"Baby, what's wrong?" he queried gently wiping the tear tracks that stained her cheeks, in response Buffy's sobs only increased as she tried unsuccessfully to crawl into his lap. "Baby please, you're scaring me, is something wrong with the you or the baby?'

"Nope" she managed to choke out, "we're both fine, well at least the baby is fine, I however can never show my face in public again." she sobbed.

"And why exactly would that be?" he asked tipping up her face so she could look into his eyes

"I went out shopping with Willow and Cordy today, I wanted to buy something nice for our anniversary, and I was having a really good day, the baby was hardly kicking and I wasn't feeling sick at all."

"Sounds good, so why the tears?"

Giving him a glare "I'm getting to the bad, geez hold your horses much. Anyway, after shopping we decided to go to dinner, cause I knew you had Maddy, so I wasn't in any hurry and then it happened.""What baby, please you can tell me anything, you know that"

Taking a deep breath she continued "Well we were sitting there talking when Spike and Xander came up, and then, then they both looked at me and started laughing and pointing" she finished as her tears began to fall again. Sensing that she would be incoherent for the foreseeable future Angel simply held his wife as she cried, murmuring words of love into her hair as her tears stained the front of his shirt, thinking of creative ways which he could torture his childe and the little idiot Harris for making his wife cry. Seeing that she was finally in control of her breathing again Angel decided to press further, "Baby, what made them laugh?"

"Me, Angel. I made them laugh, the big FAT pregnant lady who is so huge, baby elephants look svelte in comparison" she huffed. Expecting some form of denial from the man who had caused her to be in this state, she looked at her husband how was trying unsuccessfully to smother his laughter. "My God, you inconsiderate pig, you're just as bad as Spike and Xander, you know your supposed to tell me that I am overreacting and that I have never looked more beautiful., you know you are the sole reason that I am looking like this, and even you are laughing at me.' Pushing him off the bed with a forceful shove, she stormed into the bathroom, locking the door behind her.

"Baby, I'm sorry, I was just relieved, I thought there was something seriously wrong, I'm really sorry, of course you look beautiful, you know I think you look beautiful" Angel tried to placate her through the door. Coming face to face with an irate Buffy as the door was wrenched open.

"Nothing seriously wrong, do you know what I went out wearing today, this dress" indicating the pale blue shift she was still wearing "with one brown clog and one purple slip on sneaker. Angel I am so huge I can't even see my feet, I thought I was wearing a matching pair. even my so called best friends didn't tell me, apparently they thought I may have gotten upset, god what do they think I am an over-emotional mess who can't control herself?? Please."

"God I have no idea where they would get that idea from" he muttered under his breath, "Angel, you forget, slayer hearing" she announced pushing him from their room "Seeing I'm such an emotional mess, well I know that you wouldn't want to be in the same room as me so, guess what mister it's the couch for you. But than that's probably safer cause I'm so huge right, that I might squash you during the night."

"Buffy, don't you think you're being a little unreasonable?" Angel shouted through the door completely exasperated. He couldn't believe it, somehow he had become the bad guy and he had no idea how. Sitting down on the couch, he sighed, somehow he had to make it up to her, sure she might be a little overemotional right now, but that sure as hell beat a night or ten on the couch.

********

Watching the clock tick over to midnight, Buffy sighed in to the emptiness of her room, sleep was not coming tonight and she knew it. If it wasn't the movement of the babe within her womb poking her constantly as it tried to settle, than it was her mind replaying the fight she had with Angel. She knew she had been unreasonable, that he had done nothing to provoke her rage. She was in the wrong, she could see that now, Angel deserved an apology. She knew she should go apologise right now, but decided it could wait until morning, he was probably asleep and she simply didn't have the energy to make it down the stairs, let alone back up them, let alone for the kind of make up Angel would insist upon, no it could wait until morning she assured herself.

Angel too, watched the clock tick over to midnight the signal of a new day. Their anniversary, the day five years ago, when two lost souls had somehow found their way back together against all the odds. Stepping out into the night, he was overcome by the scent of roses and he remembered.

Los Angeles -2000

Angel sat at his desk long after Jheria had left, he could here Wesley and Cordelia moving around in the office cleaning up the mess he had created, so much for Cordelia's 'mushing' idea. His mind reviewing the past week, especially his response to Jheria, he didn't understand what was happening to him. For the past four years, ever since he sighted her outside Hemery, Buffy had consumed his thoughts, whether good or bad, she was the one constant he had to rely on. His memories and his love for her. However, since leaving her the memories didn't seem enough anymore, especially after their day together. Memories no longer brought relief from the reality he had chosen to surround himself in, rather all they did was increase his yearning. A yearning that he could never, would never indulge.

Perhaps that was why Jheria, had affected him as strongly as she had. She was the complete opposite to Buffy, in looks as well as personality. She was brutal, single minded, tempestuous, and there was something intriguing about her. something for the first time in months made his blood hum just a little more. It was not like it was Buffy, hell it wasn't in the same league as what he felt, still felt towards her, but it was the first time since Buffy that he felt something, and it scared him.

"Boss, so sorry to interrupt your ponderings but I believe Miss. Chase required some assistance in the foyer." Wesley, announced breaking the silence within his office.

"What, the hell are you talking about?"

"Angel, goddammit VISION" Cordelia's agonised voice called

Pushing past the former watcher, turned incompetent rogue demon hunter, he snarled "why didn't you say so?"

"Cordelia, what did you see?" he asked gently leading her to a chair.

"It's Willow, she's in danger?" Cordy exclaimed as she pushed the tears from her face, "They're going to sacrifice her Angel, she's so scared."

"Did you see where they had here?" he urged, his dead heart racing, Willow had been the only one, apart from Buffy to offer him friendship both before and after the Angelus appearance and he had great affection for the little witch.

"She's in a sewer, I think or a tunnel. Somewhere, really dark and smelly. So obviously it's in Sunnydale. Angel we have to help her"

"We will Cordy, come sunset, we are going home" Angel announced to the two ashen faces before him. "Wesley, you check with Giles and see if they know anything, tell him we will be there within a few hours."

Sunnydale- 2000

Stepping quietly into her dorm, so as not to disturb her roommate Buffy, looked around in surprise at the empty room which greeted her. Sitting on the side of her bed, she noticed casually that Willow's bed was in the same state she had left it last night. With a half eaten tub of ice-cream which had liquefied over the hours and leaked onto her doona. Next to the discarded comfort food, was a picture of her ex-boyfriend Oz, and an empty box of tissues. Sighing, Buffy began to clean up the mess wondering how to help her friend through her grieving process. It had been almost three months since Oz left and she seemed as melancholy today as she had the day he left, Buffy didn't know how to help her, perhaps Riley had a friend she could set her up with?

Riley, Buffy didn't know what to think about him. He was sweet and kind, he made her feel like a goddess, which was a feeling that she missed. Last night, well last night happened without any rational thought on her behalf. One minute they were fighting hostiles and the next minute she was engaged in a more intimate fight. It was nice she assured herself, moving around her room, shrugging off the clothes from the night before, she didn't expect better than nice anymore. Not since he left, and if nice was all she could have, well damm it was better than being alone. She remembered back to the shell of a person she had been during the summer, Willow, Xander and even Giles seemed to be relieved that she had "snapped" out of it, her mum was doing cartwheels that Buffy had a normal, respectable boyfriend. But as she observed the girl in the mirror she heard her inner voice reminding her that SHE wasn't truly happy, she hadn't moved on, not really, she was simply existing. It was all she could do without him. He had showed her at Thanksgiving, he could turn off his emotions and forget, a trick she realised that she had learned as well. Flopping onto the bed, wrapping her arms around Mr. Gordo she felt a familiar wave of loss sweep over her as she questioned what she had indeed done, she noticed the answering machine light flashing.

"Buffy, it's me Giles," she smiled, even after four years he still felt the need to identify himself, it must be the librarian in him she mused. "I need you to contact me as soon as you get this message, it is of vital importance." Of course it was always of vital importance with Giles, he never called and left messages "Hi Buffy, it's me Giles, just give me a call when you can, there's no hurry." Dialing his number, she wondered what new evil had popped up and if it could wait till she had a chance to nap.

"Hello" the subdued voice answered on the second ring

"Xander, it's me Buffy, what are you doing there it's pre-noon so by all rights you should be in the land of nod right about now" she joked.

"Yeah, normally, but something's happened and we've been here all night" his somber voice filled her heart with dread.

"What do you mean, what happened?"

"It's Willow, Buffy, she missing and we think she's been captured by someone or something" Giles voice informed her, "as Xander said we have been researching all night, I think you should come and join us."

"I'm gone Giles" she announced as she dropped the phone into the cradle.

Turning around to face the group that had formed he absently rubbed the bridge of his nose, in a subconscious sign of worry. "She'll be here soon and than we can work out what course of action to take."

Running across campus Buffy's mind was filled with the possibilities which could have befallen her friend. She had known Will, was down in a major way, missing her boyfriend with an intense pain, but also seeming to be drifting from her as well. They never seemed to hang out any more, never had the time to sit and catch up, and as she thought about it, she realised that the main reason for that drifting was herself. She had been trying so hard to redefine herself post-Angel, first with Parker, than Riley and the Initiative that she had sacrificed her best friend in the process. and now she was missing, she must have disappeared sometime after she had left her, alone, at the Bronze while she had been with Riley. God if something had happened to her she would never forgive herself.

Slamming, the door open to indicate her arrival Buffy cut straight to the point "Giles what do we know, exactly?"

"Good Morning to you to Buffy, I am afraid to say at this point we know very little. Cordelia had a vision and was kind enough to let us know."

"Cordy, you mean Miss. May Queen, since when did she become a member of the psychic friends network?"

"Well, I guess it would be around the same time, you decided that Pj's were acceptable daywear," came the biting reply as Cordelia stepped into the room cupping a mug of steaming coffee in her hands. "Interesting attire as always Buffy, god I would have thought college would have exposed you to a better range of looks, but as always none ever seem to quite work on you."

"Hi Cordy glad to see you're slumming it back in the old hometown, run out of people to annoy in LA already?" the slayer sweetly returned.

"Well if the two of you are quite finished, perhaps I can continue, Cordelia, had a vision of Willow last night trapped underground somewhere in Sunnydale. Once we were informed we began a search of the cemeteries and entrances to sewers. Where we came upon, her watch, at the entrance of the sea caves. After that we lost all track of her."

"Well why didn't you contact me, they have hours on us now, for all we know Willow could have crossed over state lines now, or they could have sacrificed her or anything." Buffy raged.

"Oh, please Buffy tell us exactly how we were meant to contact you, you left the Bronze with G.I. Joe and his buddies, without even saying bye. We left a message with your mum and on your machine. Perhaps you would have liked to try smoke signals, or wait I know you should have your own signal like Batman. No, No I've got it, you should get one of those oh so snazzy beepers, so we can keep track of your every movement, but wait you've already got one of those, but forgot to hand out the number." Xander sneered "I don't have the number, do you Giles?"

"Xander, I really don't think this is helping the matter at all." Giles weekly protested, agreeing with all Xander had said.

"DAMMIT Giles just answer the question"

"No Xander, I don't have the number."

"Hmm, I don't have the number, Giles your Watcher doesn't have the number, your Mum doesn't have the number, and I'd bet my life that Willow didn't either, so she couldn't let you know she needed help. So Buffy before you get all Miss Holier than Thou on us, perhaps you'd care to share where the hell you were, cause you weren't here with Willow's fiends trying to find out what happened." Xander fumed.

"Xander, that is enough" Giles interrupted sighting Buffy's devested face he continued "I think you made your point. Now as I said, we are at a loose end, and when we are at a loose end we research."

Trying to avoid Xander's accusing gaze, Buffy crawled into the side of the couch as Anya walked through the front door. "Oh look whose here, it's Buffy and she's had sex." the tactless ex-demon announced.

"Anya, I really don't think" Xander began looking to the stairs and the figure slowly descending.

"No, Xander I can tell she has had sex in the last few hours and I haven't, how is that fair." Anya continued, her tirade cut short by a loud THUMP.

As all eyes in the room turned to the source of the sound, Buffy's eyes widened, as her heart shattered.

"Angel," she breathed.

****

Buffy couldn't believe this was happening, surely the Powers that be, wouldn't be that evil, no she would wake up soon she assured herself. Yes it was coming any minute, no there was no way that her immortal love have just stepped into the room, just as Anya had announced Riley and her had got to know each other in the biblical sense. But as she looked into his eyes she knew the truth. His empty eyes, mocked her as he silently questioned if what he had overheard was true, could possibly be true. Wanting to explain, but knowing that there was nothing that she could say to alleviate his pain, restore his faith in her, in them she looked away.

"Well, could this get any more akward? " Cordelia, broke the tense silence. "Now as much as, I would love to sit hear and witness the spontaneous combustion that is bound to occur if these two" indicating Angel and Buffy "don't talk soon. I think for now Willow has to be our priority."

"She's right" Xander announced his eyes darting between the two silent figures "my god, I can't believe that I just agreed with Cordelia" Xander shuddered at the thought as Cordy swatted him with the back of her hand.

"Of course, it's not like there's anything to say. Buffy has her life and that's her own business." Angel's voice echoed through the room "It's time to focus on Willow now." he continued without making eye contact with anyone, to hide the tears that formed at the thought of HIS Buffy in the arms of another. "Based on Cordelia's vision and the research we conducted tonight, I think she is being held by a Krickes demon."

"A cricket's demon, well that doesn't sound that bad, what's the what. Just tell me what does it want with Willow, and how do I kill it? Buffy demanded, conscious of the time the demon had on them and the added difficulty of trapping it.

"It's a Krickes demon Buffy not a Cricket's. A Krickes is a generally harmless demon, which deals in magicks, both black and white. It is not aggressive unless their powers are threatened. From what Xander and Giles have been able to tell us, Willow's ever increasing forays into magick may have disturbed the Krickes areas and as a result it feels threatened." Wesley finished his summary.

"Perhaps you can tell us what types of spells she delved into Buffy" Angel gently questioned "If we know what offended the demon we can be better prepared."

"Um, well I don't really know, the past few weeks I haven't really been spending a lot of time with Willow. what with college and assignments and slaying and..." she finished in barley a whisper

"Oh and let's not forget your orgasm friend too." Anya interjected.

"Well yes" Giles hurriedly continued as all in the room with the exception of Anya, began to blush "It's weakness is the back of the neck, if we can attack that area, than it should be disabled and than we can rescue Willow."

"O.K. so we attack, I'm ready, willing and we all know able." Buffy announced searching Giles' supply cabinet, I don't think Mr. pointy will do the damage I need. Giles what have you got that can sever necks?"

"Buffy, I believe the most sensible plan would be to wait till sunset, than Angel can back you up, which considering the powers of this demon may be necessary." Wesley, commented observing the slayer he had left a year before. She had hardened over that time he noticed, she had lost her carefree, joyous look, and replaced it with a cynical facade, he wondered if she was even aware that it had occurred, he doubted it.

"I don't think I need back up Wes, I've been handling most things Hellmouthy just fine by myself without His help for the last year." Buffy responded, her pulse quickening at the thought of Angel patrolling once again with her and the memories of past patrols.

"I'm afraid Buffy, I must insist, although you have done an excellent job of your patrolling through the past year, you are too emotional about this. It concerns Willow and therefore, you loose judgment. I must insist that Angel accompanies you to the caves." Giles looked at his slayer as he concurred with Wesley, he knew she would object to Angel's help simply because of the issues the two still shared. If all went to plan than once Willow was rescued that Buffy and Angel would have time alone to try and sort out what was left of their relationship.

****

Two figures, one tall the other diminutive set out towards the sea caves, each silent, wary of the other. Each wanting, needing to explain, to question to receive answers. Each had there own fears of rejection, unsure of what type of reception they would receive, old and new hurts combining to strengthen each one's resolve not to speak first. As they walked along, the air thick with unspoken words, feelings, high pitched beeps shattered the silence.

"What the hell is that" Angel questioned his eyes searching the dark for the source of the annoying sound.

"That would be my beeper, I'm being paged" Buffy absently answered as she read the words that flashed across the screen

SUMMERS. REPORT INITIATIVE. ASAP.

"I'm meant to respond when I'm beeped. It's um this group who well" Buffy struggled to find the words to explain the meaning of the Initiative as she realised she was still unclear herself. "Well it's kind of like a vigil-anti group but for demons, my professor leads it. They study demons and stuff, Riley and I..." she trailed off not wanting to bring that relationship up in Angel's presence. Even though she had been told to move on, in fact he begged her to, she still felt as though she had betrayed him by doing so, and so quickly.

"Ah Riley, your new guy, what's he like" Angel questioned casually although his mind and demon raged as one to allow his true anger, hurt betrayal to show.

"Riley, he's nice," she shrugged "he likes me a lot, makes me feel normal, takes me into the sunlight, you know all those things you wanted for me." She knew the words would hurt, they were meant to and as she saw Angel's eyes fall she knew they had hit their mark. Good she thought viciously, maybe he'll understand what he put me through. Maybe if he's jealous, than I can reassure myself that he still feels a fraction of what I do for him. "Is that what you wanted to hear Angel, does the thought of me with another guy make you happy."

He grabbed her arm as she attempted to storm off "Yeah, that's exactly what I wanted to hear and don't you know it, why don't you just finish off the job. Tell me, what does he feel like inside of you Buffy, can he touch you as deeply as I did. Does his kiss make you want to die? Do you proclaim to love him, are you his girl Buffy?" he spat, anger overriding his objectivity.

"Come on Buffy, tell me when you said you'd be my girl always did you only mean until another guy came sniffing around. Well that's fine, don't think your the only one who has moved on, babe, the only one whose noticed what's on offer in the big bad world. You know the old saying what's good for the goose..."

Angel would swear later that he saw her heart shatter at his announcement, the anger that had lit her eyes throughout his tirade, evaporated leaving his beloved shattered. That was the only word to describe her at that moment.

"You, you've" Buffy stammered, tears seeping from her eyelashes, her heart aching, she felt ill. Despite being in more battles than the average army regiment, suffering more injuries than a human body could normally withstand, the pain at his words overrode every thought, every memory. She thought nothing would ever equal the pain of his leaving her, yes she had been sure that that was the worst that could be inflicted on her. However, as always she could always rely on the powers that be to find something else to hurt her with, push that pain tolerance just a little more.

"You've found someone else. My god, you've moved onto someone else and you have the nerve to question my life. How 'bout you Angel, I never realised that forever equaled a year, god all those promises to love me were just words weren't they. If you really loved me than you wouldn't have moved on." she raged looking into his chocolate eyes, searching for some indication that he still felt something for her, something beyond pain and anger.

"Ditto, babe" he responded, hating himself for feeling triumph at the obvious pain his words had given her. "But as much as I know you are enjoying this conversation I think we need to shelve it until later, were coming up to the sea caves and I think we need to focus on Willow" he reminded her, whilst removing his handy battle acte from it's carrier strapped to his back.

"I don't need you to tell me how to fight Angel. Or how to look after my friends either" she added as an afterthought, preparing herself for battle both mentally and physically.

"Buffy, we both know if that was true, Willow wouldn't be a hostage and we wouldn't be doing the rescue thing." He whispered as they moved to the entrance of the cave.

Buffy remained silent knowing that there was a large element of truth within his words, she had been a poor friend in the past few weeks and now Willow was in danger, if something had happened to her she would never forgive herself. Nor would the rest of the gang for that matter she realised.

As the two warriors moved into the cave, proper the sight before them was not what they expected. "Greetings, my friends" the Krickes demon stood before the two, noting their aggressive stance. "I assume that you are here for your friend, the little witch. No?"

"If you have harmed her in anyway than you will not be around to see the sunrise." Buffy countered, her eyes scanning the surrounding cave walls desperately searching for any sign of where Willow was being held.

"You honestly believe you have the power to stop me, child?" he raised an eyebrow and the knife which was once secured within Buffy's clenched hand, now rested on his palm.

"Well if she doesn't I do" Angel responded, slightly thrown by the power this demon possessed.

Again in response the demon merely laughed, "Angelus, I can't believe you would tell such an untruth, especially when you know that if I wanted to harm EITHER one of you there would be nothing to prevent me. Thankfully for you both, however I have no inclination whatsoever to harm you. Either of you. No sensing the pain from you both I think you are doing a better job at hurting each other than any force dark or otherwise could hope to inflict."

Ignoring the obvious truth of his words Buffy asked again "Where is Willow? I want to see her, NOW"

"Than my dear you need to return to her home, for that is where I assumed she would be. And there is no need to raise your voice at me either, thank you. Your friend needed to be taught a lesson regarding her powers and their uses. That lesson has been taught, she now knows her boundaries, thus she has been released. No harm has befallen her here I can assure you" The demon finished outraged that they believed he would harm a fellow power.

"Buffy we, can check at Giles. Ring the number" Angel handed her the mobile phone as he stepped in front of her to protect her while she was vulnerable.

"Giles, it's me. Have you seen Willow?"

"Buffy thank god you called, yes Willow arrived back here, soon after you left. She is fine, a little shaken but no harm has been done to her. Apparently.." Giles continued as Buffy cut him off "Giles, let me talk to her"

"Willow. Thank god you're ok. you are o.k. right?" Buffy asked the relief washing through her so intense it was visible to Angel, who relaxed his pose in response.

"Buffy I'm fine really. It didn't harm me, just scared me, please don't hurt it, Buffy, it didn't do anything. In fact it probably saved me from more danger by explaining what damage to the balance my spells were causing. I'm ok Buffy, really." Willow assured her friend best she could over the phone.

"Will, I'm so sorry I wasn't there" Buffy continued

"Buffy, I would have been taken with or without you being there, you have nothing to be sorry for" she answered honestly.

"Will, I'm sorry for everything too, not this, but not being there for you, you know returning the favor. I'm sorry I was a lousy friend" Buffy finished tears once again forming in her eyes as she looked up to see Angel standing beside her. "Will, I have to go. Can we talk later?" after receiving a pleased yes, Buffy quickly hung up and handed the phone back to Angel.

"Guess the 21st century finally caught up with you huh?" she smiled indicating the phone he held in his hand.

"Yeah, something like that, although this is the first time the bloody thing has actually worked."

"Well now all that is settled, perhaps you can excuse me, I don't wish to be rude, but shouldn't you both be leaving now." the demon's voice interrupted the first amicable conversation between the two for over a year.

"Oh yeah, sorry about the barging in." Buffy apologised "Oh and the threatening and knife waving and all. Well nice to meet you and all" she finished lamely as she and Angel exited the cave.

"Well, so much for the big fight, I guess Cordelia's vision was a little off?" Buffy attempted to make conversation as the pair headed towards the beach, not allowing herself to remember the painful conversation they had shared earlier. "I guess you guys will be heading off again now, that Willow's not in danger. Nothing to keep you here, keep you away from your new life, new love."

Sighing and falling to the sand Angel stared out at the vast, endless black ocean "Buffy, there's no one waiting for my return. No new love. I know you don't care anymore, but I just wanted you to know that I wasn't leaving you tonight to be in the arms of another tomorrow." Angel felt better clearing his heart, at least there would be no lies between them now.

"What do you mean, less than fifteen minutes ago, you were singing the praises of your new hottie, so don't try and cover it up now." Buffy demanded as she too fell into the soft sand, facing Angel.

"Think back, I said I had noticed what was in the world, and I have. Did I lust, I won't lie, I did but I can assure you that there was no love involved, nothing even remotely like it, no affection no caring nothing. Simple lust, did I act on it, no. Would I in future, god Buffy I wish I could look you in the eye and say NO, but I don't know. But I can promise you this it will never be love, never again."

"Angel I'm sorry, I never meant to bring Riley up, not until you asked. I didn't want to deliberately hurt you like that." Buffy looked again into his eyes, pleading with him to believe her "Angel, you want to know the truth. Fine. what's Riley like?"

"Buffy there's no need for this " Angel announced standing up, unable to hear how much she loved another.

"Yes there is, Angel. For once in your immortal life listen to me. Than if you want to go, go. I won't stop you." she forced him to look at her "Riley, is a nice guy, Angel, he is and I meant it when I said that he likes me a lot, hell he may even think he loves me. But do I love him? No I don't, not in the way that counts, in the way he wants me too. He's safe Angel, I know that I won't get lost in him, that he will never have the power over me to hurt me as much as you did, do." Sobbing she continued "his touch is a pale imitation of yours, it doesn't make my breath catch, my pulse race." Lifting his hand she placed it over her heart "His kiss is wrong, it's hot when it should be cool, it's wrong because it's not yours. His kiss doesn't make me want to die Angel, only one ever did, deep down you know that's the truth." Buffy finished by reaching up and placing her own lips against his simply holding them stationary, unsure of the response she would receive.

Angel's resolve, his good intentions were gone the moment his hand touched her skin again. He could feel her pulse racing, the vein fluttered under his familiar touch like a caged butterfly, but when her lips once again caressed hers he was lost. Unable to remain motionless against her lips he began to worship her lips with his own, kissing his way around her lips, catching small parts within his blunt teeth and gently worrying it, before smoothing the lip with his tongue. He kissed his way up her cheeks , drawing in the tears that still clung to her cheeks, before placing his lips over her eyelids and bestowing a gentle caress on each eye. At the sound of her soft sighs he drew away and cupped her check gently in his palm.

At the familiar caress Buffy trembled "Angel, I love you, only you. Riley was a mistake, I know that, hell I knew it at the time but it was so much easier to go along with it. I'm sorry, sorrier than you can know that I hurt you, but I got tired of fighting Angel, I know you know what it feels like."

"Buffy you deserve more than me, more than darkness for the rest of your life. Maybe Riley isn't the guy for you, but there will be someone, someday. I won't pretend that it won't kill me but it's what I want for you, I want you to be happy." He sighed stroking her hair, storing up memories to sustain him throughout the years to come.

"Angel, if you want me to be happy, than stay with me, it's as simple as that. Please, just stay with me we can work everything else out, just tell me do you love me?"

"Buffy, you know that, but there's more to it than that. You're the slayer, you have to deal with disaster on a daily basis, you deserve more than what I can give you." Angel argued, urging her to understand his position.

"No Angel, forget for once that I'm the slayer, that has nothing to do with us. Angel I'm just a girl, standing in front of a boy, asking him to love her. Begging him not to leave her."

"Buffy, I'm scared to tell you that I love you"

"Would you repeat that?"

"I'm scared- "

"No get to the good part. Get to the good part" she pleaded

"Buffy, never doubt that I love you, I have from the moment I first saw you and will until time ceases to turn."

"Than, that's enough. Angel, did you like the girl you saw when you first came here, the one who turned her back on her friends, the one who changed to suit a guy, who moved on?" Buffy questioned whilst crawling into his lap, needing the closeness that had been so long denied her. "Well?"

"The truth?"

"Always"

"No. You were cynical, bitter. You weren't my Buffy" he responded, unsure where this was heading.

"Than stay Angel, cause I don't think I can stop it without you. I don't like what I've become, but I'm not strong enough to change by myself, Help me."

"Buffy, are you sure, you've got Riley now, you'll be happy, it just takes time. If I stay, it's over between you two, I don't know about the clause but if I stay it's because you want me. All of me." Angel looked out into the ocean as he finished, not daring to look at his heart's love as she answered him.

"Angel, I haven't had Riley since I saw you, even if you left me again it's over he's not you, and I refuse to settle for second best, just because I can fuck him. I deserve better. Hell Angel I deserve you." Pushing herself onto her knees, she looked him in the eye,

"Angel I promise you from this night on, that I will always love you, cherish you and protect you." She punctuated her vow, by kissing his lips tenderly momentarily losing herself, until Angel pulled back.

"Buffy, my love for you is overwhelming, it makes me a better person simply for having loved you. I promise you from this night on I will always love you, cherish you and protect you from this sunset to the next and the next..." The rest of his vows were muffled beneath her lips as they sealed their declaration of love, the most basic way.

And for that on moment all was right in the world.

****

Sunnydale- 2000

The Krickes demon watched the couple on the beach, each wrapped around the other, oblivious to the happenings around them. It seemed that they had settled their pains and found each other again, their auras glowed, together in peace.

"It is how it should be" he whispered into the dark night, to those beings he knew also watched the pair from afar.

"It is how it will be" a voice from within the night whispered back "They will know when it is right, there is nothing preventing their love now, they have proved that tonight"

"And the wicca, what of her, you know she too aches for a lost love" the demon inquired

"She will be a great force in her own right" the voice replied "Her true love is yet to enter her life, the wolf was a tool, to show her how precious love can be. The wicca will be shown true love when the time is right, when she is ready."

The demon sighed to himself and returned to the cage, muttering about the over used phrase "When the time is right" leaving the couple on the beach alone. Together.

Angel tightened his arms around his love, he couldn't believe the events of the night, when he thought of how close he had come to losing her he shuddered, his future without her was a hell he now knew he would not have to endure.

"Baby, we better get going" he announced breaking the peaceful silence, "It's coming up to dawn and I'm not losing now when I just got you back"

Buffy smiled at the words snuggling back further into his embrace, "Angel, I never want this night to end, I could die happy now, now that you're back."

"I echo the sentiment my love" he replied tracing the length of her neck with his fingers, smiling at her shudders as he caressed her body.

As the two walked back towards Giles' house, each was lost in thought of their joint future, a future which until that moment an unspoken fantasy.

"Did you want to tell everyone, when we get back?" Angel questioned unsure how Buffy wanted to approach their new relationship.

"Of Course, although I think us walking in hand in hand may give the surprise away." she giggled as she imagined the shock on the faces "I have nothing to hide, I wan them to share in our happiness" she continued.

"What about Riley? Somehow I doubt he's going to rejoice in the news " Angel interrupted her.

"Well no, but he deserves better than me stringing him along. So after we tell the guys at Giles' I'll go find him and explain everything."

"How do you think he'll take it?" trying not to sound too cheerful at the pain he knew this boy was going to suffer, just as he had suffered.

"I don't know really, I think he'll be ok. It would be so much easier if last night had never happened. Angel I'm so sorry I let him touch me. I don't know what I was thinking, actually that was the problem I didn't think I was on autopilot." Buffy explained whilst taking his face into her hands "Angel you know that now you're back, there is no one else for me, nothing comes close to what we have, I cherish it and won't do anything again to make you doubt me."

"Baby, enough, we both did things we aren't proud of, but it's all behind us now." He affirmed kissing the palms of her hands "All I want to focus on now is our future, together."

Entwining his hands with her, the vampire opened the door to Giles house, pulling a nervous Buffy into the room with him.

"Giles, you owe me twenty" Xander announced as he spotted the obvious togetherness of the couple in front of him.

"You bet on me?" Buffy questioned incredulously stepping toward Xander, hand raised as a thought dawned on her "More to the point, Giles' you didn't bet on us? I think I'm more offended at that."

"No Buffy, you've got it wrong, it was a unanimous agreement that you'd get back together with Angel, the pool was to a time frame, I had wagered for an hour later" the watcher explained as he saw the girl who was for all intents and purposes a daughter to him, settle comfortably into the arms of her lover, happiness shining from her.

"Oh, well then that's ok" she replied "So where's Willow, you know the damsel in distress of tonight."

"She's upstairs with Wesley," Cordelia informed her, watching Buffy bound up the stairs to check on her friend before settling on her boss and friend "So I take it you're happy, right."

"Yes" his singular affirmative answer held so much more which each member of the group knew, "Cordy, she is what I'm searching for, the part that fills my void, she makes me whole. I was stupid enough to undervalue what we have, I'm not planning on doing it again."

"So does this mean I have to look for another job, cause that sucks, I mean I'm just getting into a routine and..."

"Cordy, I don't know what's going to happen whether I move back here, or Buffy moves with me, but you'll be looked after I promise." Angel laughed at her obvious self-interest knowing however behind that lay a sense of family that she was afraid of losing again.

~~~UPSTAIRS~~~

"So you're really ok, right nothing that you're not sharing?" Buffy inquired yet again "I mean I know that we haven't been that close really but you can tell me anything. You do know that right?"

"Yes, I know that Buffy, really I do. The demon didn't hurt me at all, just scared me at the beginning, until he explained what I had been doing to the cosmic balance." Willow sat cross legged on the bed facing her friend with an inner calm she had never known. "Buffy I know why I'm here now, why I have this power, like you I am a power, cool huh, little old me a force to be reckoned with" she continued unaware of the amused glances Wesley and Buffy shared at her obvious excitement.

"Yes well, it appears that Cordelia's vision was once again slightly inaccurate, as frightening as it was I still see no reason for Angel's presence to be required." Wesley though aloud "Perhaps if someone more mature, more reasoned was entrusted with such visions..."

"Wes. you're not seeing the greater picture here, Angel wasn't needed to save me, it was to save Buffy, god are men dense or what?" Willow interrupted the former watcher, turned rogue demon hunter.

"Save me, Will are you sure?" Buffy queried unbelieving that the powers that be would aid her love life in any way.

"Positive, Buffy you had strayed from your calling, from us, from your true self. Perhaps the Powers that Be recognised the best way to rectify the situation was to bring Angel back to town, cause anyone who knew the two of you knew you guys could take it from there." Willow answered, smiling broadly at being the voice of logic in the room, it hadn't happened that often and she realised that she enjoyed the feeling.

As the trio ventured downstairs to join the group, Buffy realised that she still had one more problem to overcome before she could simply enjoy being with Angel. One big Initiative size problem named Riley.

Calling Angel away from the group, she explained that she needed to see him and break it off, before she could make plans with him for their future. "Do you want me to come with you?" he queried feeling the nervous energy that radiated from her.

"No, this is something I got myself into I have to fix it. I just want it over and done with so I can be with you and be happy, I think we deserve it" she mused, her head resting on his cool chest "I just hope it doesn't hurt him, cause he doesn't deserve it."

"Hmmm," was all Angel could say, if he had his way, he would be present, when Buffy broke the news to G.I. JOE and make it perfectly clear in actions to whom she belonged, but alas sunlight was once again keeping him house bound.

"You'll be here when I get back right?" she asked pulling out of his embrace, still unsure of their newfound relationship. "Buffy, I'm going to be here every time you get back, your never getting rid of me. Remember forever. that's the whole point." Angel reassured her with his words and further with his kiss, "now go get rid of him and hurry back."

~~~Stevenson Hall~~~

A soft knocking on the door roused Riley from his fitful slumber, his dreams had been a chaotic mix of Buffy, Vampires and demons which left him with a feeling of dread. Opening the door he could not withhold his grin at seeing her alive and in one piece "Thank god, you're ok, I've been so worried about you." Riley babbled as he engulfed Buffy in a bear hug, oblivious to her obvious discomfort.

"Riley we need to talk" Buffy uttered the infamous words as she tried to conceal the shudders racing through her body after his hug. He's so sweaty her mind screamed, he's too warm, he's not right, he's not Angel. The thought of her beloved waiting for her at Giles gave her the added courage to finish this unpleasant task.

"Yeah, we do, what happened to you last night, you know when the beeper beeps you're meant to respond" Riley explained as though she was a four year old.

"Really you don't say, god how stupid of me, cause I thought when a beeper, beeped it meant that my microwave popcorn was ready. Duh. I know what I was meant to do Riley, but something else came up. Anyway, I'm not here to talk about that, I need to talk to you about us." Buffy continued, god how dumb did he think she was, "Riley, I don't want to be with you anymore." There, she had said it.

"What, what do you mean Buffy, you made love with me last night, and now you say we're over" Riley argued in shock "I think you better think again sweetheart, we've just begun."

Buffy shuddered at his use of phrase "No Riley, I've never been so sure of anything in my life, we had sex last night, that's all, I'm sorry if I mislead you into thinking it was more, but it was never lovemaking on my behalf. I have only ever made love to one man and one alone, and that wasn't you."

"Ok, call it what you liked, we screwed, fucked whatever, last night you gave yourself to me and I'm not prepared yet to let you go. I don't understand did I do something wrong?" Riley pleaded

"Riley, I don't think you understand what I'm doing here, I don't need your permission to leave you, I am. I wasn't truly myself when you met me Riley, but something happened last night, that reminded me that I had lost who I was, and you were part of that. Riley, my ex-boyfriend came back to visit and he forced me to confront things I have been glossing over."

"Oh I see, your ex-boyfriends come back so I get the old heave ho, I don't think so Buff" Riley stormed his grip tightening on her arm.

Buffy again shivered at his use of her abbreviated name, "Riley you're wrong, even if we weren't giving it another chance, we would be over. WE are over, so now would be a good time to let go of my hand." Buffy said as she struggled to loosen his grip, wishing that she had in fact allowed Angel to accompany her, the longer she stayed in Riley's room the more uncomfortable she felt.

"No, you're not going anywhere" Riley raged, forgetting that he was talking to a slayer.

"Riley, I am asking you one more time to let go of my hand, before I hurt you."

"What could you do..." Riley's words came to an abrupt halt as Buffy's knee connected soundly with his groin area, causing Riley to emit a high pitched whine and fall to his knees.

"It's not as though I didn't warn you, I'm sorry I hurt you Riley, you're a good guy, a tad possessive, but you'll find someone who will find that a turn on. MAYBE" Buffy finished as she shut the door on the writhing figure and that part of her life. As she ran down the stairs out onto the campus, she ran straight into a solid figure crowding the porch.

"Who lit a fire under you?" Angel asked holding up the slayer as she regained her footing.

"Angel, what are you doing here, I told you that I could handle the situ... Angle it's outside, it's daytime and there's sun and your, there's no dust. Angel there's no dust" Buffy reiterated before launching herself into his arms and covering his face with kisses. Once she had regained some form of rational thought, and regained her composure she took Angel's hand and lead him to a patch of bright sunlight on the lawn, once reassuring herself that he was not "poofing" she looked at him with an eyebrow raised "care to share?"

"Well apparently it's another thing we have to thank the Krickes demon for. Willow knew the minute she saw me, my aura had changed or something along those lines. Apparently the curse is gone, as is the fierce loathing of sun and crosses and holy water and so on. I've still got the demon but he is bound to me, this time no escape clause, I still have the need for blood, but apparently that will lessen in time too." Angel explained, delighting in the emotions that crossed her face, before one settled joy.

"Hmm, let me make sure I've got this right. We can be together, in the biblical sense and no bad. right?" she asked as she began to unbutton his shirt, smiling as she heard his strangled reply of "Right" "So care to explain what where doing here, instead of my room where there is a big, soft bed which is yet to be christened?"

"I wanted to make sure everything went ok," he indicated Riley's room with a tilt of the head "before I had my wicked way with you"

"Yep, all finished. Nothing I couldn't handle" she replied while kissing the newly revealed flesh of his chest.

"So he took it well then?" Angel persisted, his train of thought becoming seriously derailed at his lover's advances.

"Nope, but as I said, it was nothing I couldn't handle. Now are we going to spend the rest of the day talking about Riley and his maimed groin or are you goin gto take me somewhere and ravish me until I can't finish a sentence?" Buffy demanded between feverish kisses.

Of course, they hadn't made it back to her room before their passion overtook them, instead of Buffy's inviting warm bed. The two lovers renewed their love in the shade of one of the large trees which lined the campus, so consumed in each other that they never noticed the rain which fell around them.

Sunnydale 2005

Smiling at the memory Angel realised exactly what he could do to make Spike and Xander pay whilst getting back in his wife's good books. Smiling to himself he, returned inside and made a phone call.

An hour later he listened to the sound of water falling on the roof above him as he climbed into bed next to his wife. Gently kissing her awake he smiled at her foggy eyes.

"Hey" he said as she slowly fought her way through the layers of sleep.

"Angel I'm sorry I went off at you, it's just... hey it's raining" she grinned at the sound of 'rain' falling on her roof. Ever since Angel had returned to her and they had re-affirmed their love in the rain, it had always made her feel safe, secure in her love for Angel and in turn his for her. Reaching over and tracing his lips with her tongue before slipping it into his mouth to duel with his own, she sighed as his hands crept under her nightdress and gently caressed her swollen stomach before continuing up her body.

Soon both had become too engrossed with the other to notice that the 'rain' had stopped, only to start again an intermittent intervals.

High on the roof sat Spike and Xander with hoses. "I can't believe I am sitting on Peaches roof at three a.m. making rain fucking rain" Spike grumbled, before splashing his hose on his companion.

"Yeah well you were the one, who pointed out how big Buff's gotten, if it wasn't for you I'd be at home with Anya." Xander countered, reminding himself never to question Buffy's ever expanding waist line again.

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