Mirror, Mirror

by Kay

DISCLAIMER: All Buffy/Angel characters belong to Joss & Co. The Song is by M2M.
TIMELINE: After Sanctuary. Sorta an Alternate 'Yoko Factor'
SPOILERS: Sanctuary
SYNOPSIS: Buffy regrets her actions in 'Sanctuary'. A little Angsty, but if I get enough feedback... I will write more parts and they will get fluffier.
DISTRIBUTION: Just Let Me Know Where
AUTHOR'S NOTES: Erm... if you want more, feedback please. //\\ indicates italics. Oh! and if I get some Sanctuary info wrong, I didn't tape it and it isn't exactly fresh in my mind. Sorry.
FEEDBACK: Yes... Feedback has become a recent addiction. Any Flames will be used to burn Riley's and Jheira's demonic bodies.
RATING: PG-13 for a little language
DEDICATION: For Casey, who has put up with all my 'bloody hell's and even made a few herself , for Dani, who helps with my ideas, you two are the bestest buds ever! And to Echo (Liz) you are my insparation for writing fics. I dunno if you are on this list but You're one the most talented authors in the world of buffy/angel fic. You inspired me to start writing.


Part One:

Why don't I like the girl I see?
The one that's staring right in front of me
Why don't I think before I speak?
I should have listened to that voice inside of me

I must be stupid, must be crazy, must be out of mymind
To say the kind of things I said last night

Mirror, Mirror hanging on the wall
You don't have to tell me who's the biggest fool of all
Mirror, Mirror I wish you could lie to me
And bring my baby back, bring my baby back to me.

Mirror, Mirror, lie to me
Show me what I want to see
Mirror, Mirror, lie to me
Show me what I want to see\\

*~*~*~*

Buffy stood in front of the mirror, looking at herself. She was disappointed in what she had become. Of what she had done. She felt empty, hollow. It was three days from when she had returned from LA. She had felt hollow since then, and the song on the radio didn't help either. It described her perfectly.

*~*~*~*

Why did I let you walk away?
When all I had to do was say 'I'm sorry'
I let my pride get in the way
And in the heat of the moment, I was to blame

I must be stupid, must be crazy, must be out of my mind
Now In the cold light of the day, I realize

Mirror, Mirror hanging on the wall
You don't have to tell me who's the biggest fool of all
Mirror, Mirror, I wish you could lie to me
And bring my baby back, bring my baby back to me

If only wishes could be dreams, and all my dreams could come true,
There would be two of us, standing here in front of you,
If you could show me, that someone that I used to be
Bring back my baby, My baby to me.\\

*~*~*~*

Buffy sighed. She was a fool. She had told off the one person that loved her the most, because she knew it would hurt. It was like squeezing lemon juice on an open wound. Then, when she got home, Riley dumped her, something about 'trust issues' or some crap. She really didn't listen. She was mad at herself, mad at the Powers, mad at destiny. She flopped down on her bed, a singular tear coursing down her face.

*~*~*~*

Mirror, Mirror, hanging on the wall
You don't have to tell me who's the biggest fool of all
Mirror, Mirror, I wish you could lie to me
And bring my baby back, bring my baby back to me

Mirror, Mirror, hanging on the wall
You don't have to tell me who's the biggest fool of all
Mirror, Mirror, I wish you could lie to me
And bring my baby back, bring my baby back to me.

Mirror, Mirror, lie to me
show me what I want to see
Mirror, Mirror, lie to me
Show me what I want to see
Mirror, Mirror, lie to me
Show me what I want to see
Mirror, Mirror, Lie to me\\

*~*~*~*

The song finished, and another one started. She really didn't notice. She was staring blankly at the ceiling, when Willow came in. Willow sighed. She knew why Buffy was moping, she had called Cordelia, who was about to call her, because Angel was brooding with his 'Buffy face'. Then Willow and her formed a plan.

*~*~*~*

Buffy finally snapped out of it, when Willow turned off the radio and sat on her bed.

"Buffy. I'm going to be frank. I'm tired of your moping. You've been like this since you came back from LA. Did something happen?"

"No, Wills, it went fine." She trailed off, seeing Willow's resolve face. "Ok, it didn't go fine."

"Tell me what happened."

Buffy sighed. She didn't want too, but it would probably be good to get it off her chest. "I went down to his apartment and found him hugging Faith. She had blood on her hands. I didn't think. I just acted. And that isn't an excuse. She tried to apologize, but I wouldn't let her. Angel made her go upstairs. We fought. I totally bitched him out. Said things he shouldn't have had to hear. Later, I found Faith on the roof. I started fighting with her and she didn't try to fight back. The Council surrounded the place in helicopters. We got down, but it seemed they had called the police. We couldn't find Faith. Since Angel was housing a murderer and wouldn't tell them where she was, because we honestly didn't know, They arrested him. But Faith had turned herself in first.", She paused, trying to hold back tears. "Outside the police department, well, you know, with my pride, I had to get the last word in. I rubbed Riley in his face. I knew how much I was hurting him, but I kept going. Finally, he told me to leave. I did. I was half way home, when I realized what I had done. Willow, I bitched out, told off, and totally devastated, the person that I love the most. And to top it off, Riley dumps me, right after I get home, with some crap about trust issues." She paused, her tears running freely now. "That's irony, for you." She said bitterly. "I want so bad to apologize to Angel, but I really don't deserve his forgiveness. I wouldn't hold it against him if he never saw or spoke to me again. I hate the person I've become. I wish I could be the old Buffy again

Willow handed her friend a tissue and hugged her. She new it was bad, but not that bad. Buffy pulled away, hastily wiping away her tears. "I have to patrol now. See you later, Will."

Willow waited till she was out of the room, then pressed the stop button on her tape recorder. She popped the tape out, then walked to the computer. She had a letter to write.

*~*~*~

Part 2:

LA

"Mail's come!!!" Cordelia shouted. "Bill, Bill, payment. Oooh! Payment! Letter from Willow, Bill."

"Wait? A letter from Willow?" Angel asked, worried something was wrong.

"Yep. It's for you." She said, trying to hold in the big smile she was about to break into. She handed the Manila envelope to him "I'll leave you alone now." She said, as she walked out of his apartment and up to the office. In the elevator she finally let in and smiled.

*~*~*~*

He opened up the envelope as soon as Cordelia was gone. A tape and a letter fell out. He started reading the letter.

Hey Angel,

Hi! It's Willow here, and I'm writing this letter because of what happened when Buffy came to LA. Buffy has been not all there since she came back. I had called Cordelia because of this, to see if anything was wrong. She told me what she knew. We both didn't want moping friends. So, we formulated a plan. I'm not telling you what, you'll find out later. Contained in this package is a tape. I talked Buffy into telling me about what happened. Listen to it. It pretty much is an apology. I'll tell you now, that she doesn't blame you at all. So, Listen to the tape. You decide what to do next.

Your Friend,
Willow

P.S. Riley broke up with her, right after she came home. It explains why on the tape.\\

*~*~*~*

Angel finished reading the letter. He drew an unnecessary breath. He contemplated listening to it. He gave in. He put the cassette in his tape player and pushed 'play'.

Buffy. I'm going to be frank. I'm tired of your moping. You've been like this since you came back from LA. Did something happen?"

"No, Wills, it went fine"\\

There was a pause "Okay, it didn't go fine."\\

*~*~*~*

I want so bad to apologize to Angel, but I really don't deserve his forgiveness. I wouldn't hold it against him if he never saw or spoke to me again. I hate the person I've become. I wish I could be the old Buffy again"\\

The tape finished, playing dead air. He sat there for a moment, then got up, slowly and packed his bags. He had to go to Sunnydale. He wasn't going to have her think that.

*~*~*~*

Cordelia was talking on the phone when he went upstairs with his bags. "Hold on." She said, into the phone. "Where are you going?"

"Sunnydale." He hurried out the door and then peeked back in. "Oh, and Cordelia."

"What?"

"Thank you." He said, and left.

Cordelia turned back to the phone. "Willow, he's going to Sunnydale." She said excitedly. "I'll be there in a hour or two."

*~*~*~

Angel wandered the lovely graveyards of Sunnydale. He knew Buffy would be out patrolling. After wandering a while and staking a few vamps, he felt her. He came closer. She was being attacked by about ten vampires. He rushed in, staking one from behind. Buffy glanced up for a moment and saw Angel. Her eyes were full of confusion and a slight bit of happiness. She went back to fighting. The fight was over in a matter of minutes. She walked up to him.

"Angel." She said, as if it were a usual greeting.

"Buffy." He said in the same manner.

"It's not that I'm not glad to see you, but why are you here?"

"Looking for you. Come on, let's get to your dorm. Willow might help explain."

She looked confused. Willow? What did she have to do with this? She didn't voice her questions, just nodded.

*~*~*~*

They reached her door.

"Come on in." she said, casually inviting him in. She was surprised to see Cordelia and Willow chatting happily on Willow's bed. They looked up.

"Well it's about time. I guess you wanna know stuff, right?" Cordelia said in typical Cordelia style.

"It would be nice." Buffy said.

Willow sighed. "Sit down." They complied. "Cordelia and I talked a day after Buffy got back. She told me what she new of what happened. We figured it must have been pretty bad, judging how you both were acting. Like I said in the letter, Angel, we didn't want moping friends. And Buffy I'm apologizing in advance, I'm so sorry, but the conversation we had? I taped it. I sent it to Angel. I'm sorry."

Buffy looked a little dazed, she was angry, but she knew Willow was sorry, so she kept her peace and said calmly "You're forgiven."

Willow smiled, "Anyway, I sent the tape to Angel. I told him it was his choice for what to do after what happened. He came. So, the goal of this plan is to get you guys on a civil relationship, we're not asking for you guys to get together again-"

"But, it would be nice." Cordelia butted in.

"But, I translated the curse, and the truth was, it wasn't a curse, it was a gift. So there is no way out of it. There is no clause." Willow said.

"And, so you guys can talk, I reserved you guys a table at that new French restaurant down the street, for tomorrow night." Cordelia said. "And we." She said, motioning to Willow and Buffy "Are going shopping."

Buffy and Angel just looked like they were soaking in information. Buffy turned to Angel "I'm so sor-"

"I know Buffy, you don't need to say it."

"Yes, I do! I'm sorry Angel," She looked down. "You heard the tape, so you probably know that I didn't think. But that's not and excuse. I'm so sorry."

He lifted her chin up. She was crying. He wiped a tear off her face, "Shh, it's ok, you know I hate it when you cry." He pulled her into his arms.

"You know, this is why I reserved that table. Puh-lease." Cordelia said, ruining the moment. "Angel, we need to get ready to shop. Go." She said, making shooing motions. He looked at Buffy. She nodded.

"I'll see you tomorrow. We need girl talk time." She laughed.

"I'll be staying at the mansion, if you need me."

"Ok." She replied and he walked out the door.

"So. Shopping?" Cordelia asked.

*~*~*~*

Part Four:

"So you're serious, Will. It's permanent?"

"Yep. So totally sure."

They were at Sunnydale mall, the next day, currently window shopping. Buffy hugged her best friends, something she had been doing for the last day now.

"Enough, with the hugging. We get it, you're thankful." Cordelia said, then her eyes turned to the window. "We so have to get you that."

*~*~*~*

"How do I look?" Buffy said, emerging from the bathroom. Willow and Cordelia both gasped.

"Wow." Willow said, "Angel's going to love it." She was wearing a powder blue, satin dress that came to her knees. Her hair was up, except for a few pieces, that hung around her face. She was wearing matching strappy, high heeled sandals.

"Blue is definitely your color." Cordelia said. She so didn't want to admit that Buffy looked better than her.

Buffy smiled, making her even more beautiful. "Thanks guys."

Someone knocked on the door.

"That would be Angel." Cordelia said, getting the door.

*~*~*~*

"Buffy you look." If Angel could breath, he would be breathless.

"You look great too." He was wearing all black. 'Nothing new there' she thought to herself.

"Have a great time!" Willow and Cordelia said, as they walked out the door.

Willow, Oz, Doyle, and Cordelia were going on a double-date to the movies.

"Well." Angel said. Buffy was the only person that could make him search for words.

"Let's go." She finished, smiling brightly.

"Right." He held out his arm and she took it.

*~*~*~*

Cordelia and Willow met up with Oz and Doyle outside the cinema.

"So, Princess, how's the matchmaking gig goin' for ya?" Doyle asked, after giving Cordelia a quick kiss on the cheek.

"It's good. I think Angel forgave her the moment she left. She just needed to forgive herself. I think it's going to be good, the curse is gone, they're in the same town, most of the obstacles are taken out." Willow said.

"The rest of the obstacles are the ones they need to talk out." Cordelia finished up. "Now, let's get to the movie."

*~*~*~*~

Part 5:

Buffy woke up in a different bed. She turned over and smiled at who she saw next to her. She started thinking about last night, and her smile grew bigger.

* * *

The restaurant was wonderful and dinner was delicious, halfway into the salad, he spoke.

"So. we need to talk."

"Yes. We do." She said seriously. "Now, I know the reason's why you left, and now I'm going to tell you what I think of them."

He opened his mouth. She held out her hand. "I need to do this without being interrupted. Now, reason number one, you want me to have a normal life. Well, I tried. I got as possible to normal as I could, and the truth is, I can't be normal. My last boyfriend was a demon hunter by night, for God's sake. And also, what I've found during my 'normal' experiment, is that a normal life is *boring*. Normal is highly overrated. Second reason, walks in the sunshine, Angel, my life is darkness, it's my job, my comfort. Third reason: You can't give me children. So? Being pregnant would be dangerous to my line of work, If I was, I could be killed, as would a baby. Third reason: You can't grow old. Who says I'm going to live long anyway?"

He opened his mouth to protest. She held her hand out again. "Angel, I'm just looking at the facts. I'm the longest living Slayer in history, but someday, there will come a demon that is a little stronger and a little faster than me. I don't want to die alone, Angel. See, I don't want any of these things if it means I can't be with you." By the time she was finished, the main course was almost done, and her eyes were shining with tears.

He nodded. "You're right. As much as I tried to deny it, they were stupid reasons, but I didn't like being on your mother's bad side-"

"What does my mother have to do with this?"

'Damn.' He cursed in his head he took an unneeded breath. "Your mom came over and pointed out the reasons why we shouldn't be together."

"And you listened to her? She told me once that if I left my house I shouldn't even think about coming back. She can't accept things, Angel. And, though she is my mother, the women is dense." She laughed lightly, "Must be your 18th century manners, to listen to her." Everything went smoothly from there.

* * *

"Why don't. we try out. that clause-free curse." She said, between kisses at the mansion. They were hungry for each other, and with the touch of a hand, passion arose (think IWRY).

There was a lot less talking from there.

*~*~*~*

Buffy yawned, awakening herself out of her reverie. She looked at the clock and groaned. It was ten am. 'Ah, hell, forget about classes.' She rolled over and curled herself up against Angel.

*~*~*~*

It was one when she awoke again. She stretched out her arm and found the bed was empty. She got up, put on Angel's bathrobe and walked into the kitchen. She smiled when she saw him in there, his back turned to her. She walked over and out her arms around him.

"Hey."

"Hey. You were asleep, and I figured you might be hungry when you got up."

"You're right about that." She said, grinning. "Mmm. Ham and Cheese Omelet, my favorite."

"I know." He said, smiling back. He handed her a plate.

She slapped her forehead. "Damn!"

"What?"

"I told Willow and the gang that I'd meet them at the Bronze tonight. "But I wanna stay here." She said with a coy smile

"So we'll both go."

"Okay." She said, a mischievous smile crept on her face. "But not too long."

"No. Not too long."

*~*~*~*

Epilogue:

"Where is she?" Xander asked. Buffy was ten minutes late.

"She'll be here soon." Willow said, a smile threatening to appear. She knew what they were probably doing. No. Bad thoughts. Bad mental images.

"There she is," Anya said, apparently bored, "She got over Riley fast. She went directly for the tall, dark, and handsome. Hey. he looks familiar." Xander whipped around, only to see Buffy and Angel walking towards the table, a little ruffled.

"Deadboy??" Xander said loudly enough for only the table to hear.

Angel raised an eyebrow, "How many times do I have to tell you-"

"Quit calling me that. I know." Everyone laughed at Xander's response. They talked amongst themselves for awhile.

The song playing ended and a new one started. Familiar chords filled the air. Buffy jumped off Angel's lap. "I love this song! Dance?" She asked. Angel led her to the dance floor, she laid her head on his shoulder and let the words wash over her.

/There are times
I swear I know you're here
When I forget about my fears
Feelin' you my dear

Watchin' over me
My hope sees
What the future will bring
When you wrap your wings

And take me Where you are
Where you and I will be together
Once again
We'll be dancin' in the moonlight
Just like we used to do
And you'll be smilin' back at me Only then will I be free
When I can be
Where you are

And I can see your face
Your kiss I still can taste
Not a memory erased

Oh, how I see your star
Shinin' down on me
And I'd do anything
If I could just
Be right there where you are

And you and I will breathe together
Once again
We'll be dancin' in the moonlight
Just like we used to do
And you'll be smilin' back at me
Only then will I be free
Then I will be free
So take me where you are

And baby there are times when selfishly
I'm wishin' that you were here with me
So I can wipe the tears from your eyes
And make you see
That every night when you are dreamin'
I'm here to guard you from afar

And anytime I feel alone
I'll close my eyes and dream of where you are

Where you are
Where you and I will breathe together
Once again
We'll be dancin' in the moonlight
Just like we used to do
And you'll be smilin' back at me
Only then will I be free
Then I will be free/

*~*~*~*

Mystick One's Abode

Kay, one of the Mystick Ones, watched the reunion through a shimmering pool. She sighed happily, and only then noticed the presence behind her.

"Nice song choice." Said Danielle, one of her fellow deities.

"Thanks.", she replied, not turning around.

"God, do you always have to have mushy endings. That's just. try a little variety." Came another voice, this one belonging to Devyn, third One to show up.

Kay didn't notice, but Dani turned to her friend and Sister and scowled, "Let her have her fun. We let you have yours, and yours is much more elaborate. At least she doesn't go party on other planets!"

"Shut up, midget." Devyn said, not as harsh, affected by her Sister's words. She perked up, though, when she saw Dani trying to hide her anger.

"What are you watching?" asked Casey from the door, the Four Mystick Ones gathered.

"I'll give you three guesses." Said Devyn.

"I only need one.", Casey replied, "Buffy?"

"BINGO! And she wins the prize!" Devyn said sarcastically.

The dance ended and Kay turned away, a light pink beanbag materialized and she sat in it. A blue one appeared for Dani, a green for Casey, and an orange for Devyn.

"Hey, don't pout there will be more bad things to fix, happy endings to make."

"Unfortunately." Muttered Devyn.

Casey shot her a glare but Dani and Kay paid her no heed.

"Yeah. Next time." Kay breathed.

The End

Like the ending? Surprise, huh! I'm writing more about the Mystickal Ones (based on me and my best friends) in more stories. I'm thinking a series!

Send feedback to Kay

Back to the Fanfiction Archive