DISCLAIMER: Don't own them, only wish I did, song belongs to Jeff Buckley
SPOILERS: S.4 for Buffy, S.1 for Angel
SYNOPSIS: Angel attends Buffy's wedding and afterparty.
DISTRIBUTION: Let me know if you want to take it
FEEDBACK: Please, I crave it A LOT!
RATING: PG ***WARNING CONTAINS ANGST***
AUTHOR'S NOTES: This is not what I want to happen, at all, I just had to get
it written to get it out of my mind. My friend showed me this song and I had
an idea floating around in my head, so I had to do a fan fiction with it.
This is our last goodbye
I hate to feel the love between us die
But it's over
Just hear this and then I'll go
You gave me more to live for
More than you'll ever know
I couldn't believe the day had come. I never thought I would live to see it come, or at least hoped I wouldn't. She was marrying another man. I had sat through the ceremony; I didn't say a word. I don't even think she knew I was there. I was so tempted to shout at her to come to her senses as they asked if anyone had reason to object. I sure did, but for both of our sakes, I wouldn't say a word, no not me. I was too noble.
Now I was at the party afterwards. She was surrounded by all her friends and family. She looked gorgeous in the long white dress. I would have left then, with the memory burned in my mind that she was happy. That was what I wanted her to be, happy. I started to make my way to the door when I felt a hand grab my shoulder.
"Angel don't go, not just yet."
"Why not?"
"Don't you want to dance with me?"
With that I led her to the dance floor. She glided over the hardwood floor of the room like an angel. I heard a song start, and knew before I heard it that I was going to have to get a copy.
This is our last embrace
Must I dream and always see your face
Why can't we overcome this wall?
Baby maybe it's just because I didn't know you at all
For one moment I allowed myself to close my eyes, and I pictured that it was I, not HIM that was the lucky groom. It was just like my dream had been before. We were happy, really and truly happy. Then all too soon I was jerked backed to reality and asked myself what I was doing. I forced myself to wriggle out of your embrace and started for the door.
Kiss me, please, Kiss me
But kiss me out of desire
Babe and not consolation
You know it makes me so angry
Because I know that in time
I'll only make you cry
This is our last goodbye
You looked at me with your eyes, so soft and full of emotion that I couldn't quite read. I think part of you knew that I was going to leave. You pulled me out of view of the others. Then you kissed me, sweet and bitter, yet full of desire. I couldn't stay; I always had to leave. That was my curse. Well, one of them. I stopped and walked out leaving you with a look on your face that was pure despair. The last sight I saw was the few tears that escaped your pretty eyes.
Did you say, "no this can't happen to me"
Did you rush to the phone to call?
Was there a voice unkind in the back of your mind?
Saying, "maybe you didn't know him at all
* * * * * * * * * * * * * *
I couldn't believe that you came. I knew you were in the back of the church. The tears I cried were for you. I knew that I had to finish this, but part of me wanted to run to you and rush out like bandits; that would be my heart. The other told me to stay put and say my vows like a good girl; that would be my head.
I started to run after you and I reached the parking lot before I found that running in stilettos was not one of the easier tasks. I took them off, and then looking up saw your black convertible stealing off into the night.
I realized now that it was useless, futile and that you could not be talked into coming back. This all came crashing down and I now knew what had kept us apart all these years. We knew each other too well… or perhaps, just maybe, not at all.
Well, the bells out in the church tower chime
Burning clues into this heart of mine
Thinking so hard of her soft eyes and the memory
Of her sighs that, "it's over… it's over"
"It's over"
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