Rated: PG
Summary: Angel Post NFA LJ15minuteficlet
Disclaimer: Joss owns them sadly to say. I would have never put my boy in this situation.

He hadn't expected to feel this way afterwards. Actually, he hadn't expected to feel anything at all except maybe blinding torment, the fires of Hell licking the soles of his feet, you know things like that. He thought he'd be dead. He hadn't expected to feel empty, like a shell vacated instead of one waiting to be filled.

This was worse, much, much worse. The rain still poured in torrents. It puddled around the bodies of his friends. Gunn had been the first to go. They had tried to get him to set it out, take refuge in an abandoned building. He had fought until the end. Angel had always admired Gunn. He didn't think he'd ever told him that. He admired him because he was only human, because he was only human and Gunn hadn't known the meaning of the word quit.

Spike had been burned to ash by a gout of flame from the dragon none the less. Cocky little bastard had to take him down before Angel could get to him. He had a hard time feeling sorry for him, not because he wouldn't miss Spike. He'd spent too much of his existence not to miss Spike. He had a hard time feeling sorry for Spike because they both knew Spike had earned his redemption, his right to rest when he'd helped save the world in Sunnydale.

Illyria had been the last to fall. Without her, Angel couldn't have won this battle. The former Goddess had saved his life, held back the wall of demons. She hadn't really belonged in this world anyway. Wes had made the only place she had in it. When he was gone, so was her place here.

All his friends were gone and he was left to wonder why he'd been spared. He wished he hadn't been, maybe then he wouldn't feel so empty.

*

The cargo ship to Rome had taken a week. He'd hidden in the hold and eaten rats. He supposed it was appropriate that he return to her just as he'd came to her. It took him two weeks to gather the courage to knock on the door to her apartment.

She opened the door with a smile, his smile and leaned against the frame. "I wondered when you were going to quit skulking in the shadows," she said.

He smiled, her smile. "You knew I was here?"

She shrugged. "Soul mates, special Angel sense."

He'd forgotten that he wasn't the only one that felt alive when they were together.

"So are you going to stand in my hall way or do you want to come in?" She asked.

He swallowed hard and looked at his feet. He didn't deserve to walk back into her life. He hadn't deserved to walk into her life in the first place.

She always had been impatient. It was one of his favorite qualities about her. It made her human and real and Buffy. She took his hand and twined her fingers with his. The silver of the claddagh ring, his ring felt warm and smooth against his skin.

"Angel, come in," she invited.

He stepped inside. He was still empty but now he was waiting to be filled.

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