DISCLAIMER: none of these characters belong to me...lyrics by Dido
SPOILERS: season 3 of BTVS
SUMMARY: after grad. day part 2
FEEDBACK: i'd love it
DEDICATION: for Angelbabs...thank u sooo much

//My lover's gone
I know that kiss will be my last//

Buffy walked slowly home, away from the debris, the smoke, the lights. Everything seemed to have past in a blur. Confusion and numbness were her companions. The singed diploma dangled from weary fingers. Entering the house, she gave a silent blessing that her mother was still gone. The shower was warm and the grime slid down the drain. Unfortunately, heartache wasn't that easy to be rid of.

//No more his song
The tune upon his lips has passed//

Climbing under her comforter Buffy waited for sleep. It didn't come. In exasperation, she grabbed a blanket and slipped out her window and onto the roof. The night was clear and a handful of stars were scattered about. Solitude. Silence. Brutal reality finally set in. Angel was gone. Gone, the word resonated through her mind. It was so final, so definite. Even now she could feel his presence fade. She had saved the world, again, only to watch him disappear, again. The rush of tears slid, scalding, down her face.

//I sing alone
I will not watch the ocean//

She prayed to awaken and find herself wrapped in his arms. The nightmare washed away by his warmth. Brown orbs that would shine with affection and lips that would curve into that crooked half grin swam in her vision. There was

such exquisite pain and desolate loneliness. Night began to fade and the brilliant colors of the sunrise framed the huddled figure on top of the roof. Dragging herself back to bed she finally lapsed into a dreamless slumber.

//As I slept I felt him go
Returns no more//

Joyce Summers breathed a heavy sigh of relief. Mr. Giles had said that everything was all right and she could come home. He had stressed that Buffy wasn't injured but she didn't dare believe it until she saw it. Quietly she crossed the room to her daughter's bedside. A trembling hand lightly smoothed the silken strands. Her gaze traveled towards Buffy's hand. It was tightly clenched around an object. Gently Joyce pried her fingers open and withdrew a gleaming silver cross. A vermilion imprint of the cross remained on the soft palm. Placing it on the nightstand, Joyce placed a kiss on Buffy's cheek then left.

//My lover's gone
His boots no longer by my door//

Her bags dropped onto the floor with a loud thud. Joyce collapsed onto the bed, limbs every which way. A puzzled frown appeared on her face as she glanced at her dresser. The wooden frame was empty. To drained from travel and

worry to dwell on a picture she fell asleep.

//No earthly ships will ever bring him home again
Bring him home again//

Miles away the precious photo was placed with care among the leaves of a book and slid into place upon a dim and dusty shelf.

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