DISCLAIMER: I don't even wanna think about those B***RDS who think themselves gods. Sorry. Bad mood. Last episodes can do that to a B/A shipper... Seriously? Not mine. Thank God for that.
DISTRIBUTION: If you have something of mine feel free and take it. If you don't, just ask.
TIMELINE: After 'The Gift' BUT before S6/S3
SUMMARY: My take on Buffy's time in Heaven and my only hope in the midst of current events... You can't blame a girl for dreaming, can you?
AN: I was writing the sequel for 'Tonight' when the idea came. BTW, have you ever read 'Even The Nights Are Better'? It's one of the first fics I ever read and I *still* love it. That's where the title comes from. BTW, I'm not so proud of this fic but after reading it for the fifth time I've became attached to it. Personally, I consider it sweet. Be kind with it.
AN2: Shannah is all mine. If you've read 'The Truth', then you probably know who -and what- she is.
RATING: PG.
FEEDBACK: I would *really* love it if you send it. I would *really* love you if you send it. I would *really* love it if... Get my point?

She was walking though the clouds. Fluffy clouds. Have you ever seen those sweet/pink/cottonlike candies at the fairs? Well, this path was like one of them.

She was... content. Nothing could happen to her here. She was safe. Her family and friends were safe. For the first time, her existence was pure perfection. Only that it wasn't. It.Was.Not.Perfect. She just wanted to shout and send this to Hell.

Yeah, it was a blasphemy.

So what?

Since when had someone cared if Heaven went to Hell?

Right at this moment, she could have welcomed the change in scenery. Anything but this constant pastel world...

She was a Slayer, for God's sake! Slayers don't walk on fluffy clouds. They don't live being pampered and cared for. Slayers *slay*. And she was THE Slayer - never mind that there was another one down there.

In short?

She was *bored*

BORED

Not even a little fight where to vent all her fury; not even an evil demon to taunt. All here was about perfection, smiles, fluffy happiness... and nobody to really share it with...

She sighed deeply. When she had first come, she had been... elated. All those people she once knew, all those she would still meet, all of them welcoming her with open arms and nice words. Then she had seen *her*. One little girl who made the difference.

She sighed again at the memory of that little girl. She would later learn that nobody would ever see that bright girl down there. Her existence had been 'programmed' to exist but now it was not. Not anymore. She had gulped when she understood why.

Heaven was not perfect since that moment.

Her name was Shannah, precious bundle of joy who couldn't be quiet even if her life depended of it. Of course, she didn't know what that metaphor was about, she never would. Now Shannah would never see the real light of the sun, never would taste what millions other children did everyday. Just because she had been crazy enough to jump off.

She closed her eyes at the memory.

She was Crazy.

And bored.

Never a good combination.

Therefore, when THEY gave her the chance to go back she didn't even doubt it. She would return to fight. Her path had been traced and the majority of it was not very nice. She had accepted immediately. She *had* to be crazy. Nevertheless, she had already decided, and she couldn't back out now.

As if she wanted to!

She only was sorry for the kind little girl who always could make her laugh. How could she leave her in this place? Did she have *any* hopes that she would see her younger friend down there? Could she really do it?

She could.

She would.

She just had something to do before leaving.

THEY had given her the time for it. Some hours to say good bye to all her dear friends. 'Bye, Mum,' 'Bye, Merrick,' 'Bye, Pike,' - he had died in a foolish car-accident. Those had been the easy ones. Not even the desperate hug her mother had engulfed her in had provoked as much feelings as her next stop would. She saw Shannah playing between the flowers.

She took a deep breath.

Next thing she knew Shannah was tugging at her skirt with eager vigour. The little girl offered her a big and colourful bouquet she had just picked out from the 'garden' with a big smile.

How could she abandon her?

She took the flowers from her friend's tiny hands and looked into her innocent eyes. That innocence would be preserved if she stayed. Shannah didn't have to know the real world - with its literal and metaphorical monsters- if she didn't leave. But then, didn't she have the right to know also of the beauties of 'down there'?

She smiled and decided to go right to the point. "I'm leaving."

Shannah didn't even blink. "That's why I picked out the biggest daisies," she answered easily, "You will remember me when you see them, won't you?"

They had told her that she wouldn't remember a thing. Afterdeath was supposed to remain humanity's biggest mystery. Lie to me, a past voice whispered. "Of course."

The girl smiled and embraced her. "I'll miss you when you're gone." She bent down and hugged Shannah to her tightly. After some seconds, the child added seriously. "Will I ever see you again?"

She looked into the brown eyes and swore that they would never hold a tinge of brooding if Shannah ever came into her life. "I hope so." And how did she hope! It would not only mean a reunion with this joyful child; it would also mean greater things. Things she had only allowed herself to think once she knew where she had seen those brown eyes before.

"Just don't forget me, Mommy."

"I will never forget."

And so Buffy Summers said good-bye and kissed her dear daughter on the cheek.

When she opened her eyes, she was in a hateful dark, small place. She could not breath. "Where am I?" Something tugged at her mind... Pink cotton?

And so, Buffy Summers had forgotten once more.

But, of course, she had no idea of that. Her lungs were burning and her senses panicking. What the hell...!?

With pure instinct and fear guiding her she clawed her way out of her prison.

Later, she would realise that she had been in a coffin, that her friends had placed her there and then ripped her of her restful place. Why would they make her come back? Didn't they understand that it was peaceful wherever she had been? Did they even think of her when they decided *this*? She didn't like it here... She wanted to go back... wherever she came from.

However, she always kept the daisy though nobody knew where it had come from.

And even when she was old and wrinkled she never forgot the foggy dream where a girl gave it to her, a girl who resembled remarkably her now adult daughter... who still hasn't arrived home for Thanksgiving dinner...

"Will that girl ever be on time?" she huffed impatiently.

"She is not a girl anymore," her husband countered from his seat.

"No wonder she's always been a Daddy's girl," she noted amusedly.

Angel just chuckled.

Buffy could not remember ever feeling something as perfect as *this*.

Wow. Where did that fluffy end come from? This was supposed to be angsty! Not even my inner muse can make up her mind... *sigh* Hope you enjoyed it. Send feedback and go check 'Complex Cycles'.

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