SUMMARY: After the episode "Spin the Bottle" instead of running back to Connor, Cordelia flees town and now after 5 years, Cordy comes back to Angel Investigations to see if the love between her and Angel is real.
DISTRIBUTION: Take it PLEASE! Also my other fics... I don't like asking ppl to put my fics on their page personally... I'd rather them offer. So please..OFFER!
E-MAIL: shawtyPnAyangel220@hotmail.com
SPOILERS: S4 of Angel and S7 of Buffy
A/N 1: Just to let you know, I started writing this when the Beast first appeared. And there are absolutely no spoilers for future episodes in this fic. This is just me and a pencil writing down whatever comes to my head. So if ANY of this happens, it's out of pure coincidence.
A/N 2: Connor and Cordy never got it on. That's just gross. EW! And there was no potential slayers thing. I honestly think that idea was retarted. So no what's her name and Willow. And Gunn didn't do it with Gwen.
DISCLAIMERS: Nothing's mine. The song's "Tell me it's Real" by K-Ci and JoJo, that belongs to them. And the characters belong to Jossie Boy and his crew.

Tell me it's real
The feeling that we feel
Tell me that it's real
Don't let love come
Just to pass us by
Try, is all we have to do
It's up to me and you
To make this special love
Last forever more

Baby you told me that you love me and you'd never leave my side
Through the bitter end through the thick and thin
You promised me baby that you wasn't going anywhere, yes you did
Baby keep it real let me know just how you feel

Tell me it's real
The feeling that we feel
Tell me that it's real
Don't let love come
Just to pass us by
Try, is all we have to do
It's up to me and you
To make this special love
Last forever more

I can't explain the way you make me feel
Everytime you tell me that you love me
And you know you did so many times
Just when i thought that love could never be a part of me
That's when you came along
And showed me happiness
Baby you are the best
I think you're different from the rest
I really love you

Tell me it's real
The feeling that we feel
Tell me that it's real
Don't let love come
Just to pass us by
Try, is all we have to do
It's up to me and you
To make this special love
Last forever more

Tell me it's real
This feeling that I fell
Tell me it's real
For your love
I will do anything

Tell me it's real
The feeling that we feel
Tell me that it's real
Don't let love come
Just to pass us by
Try, is all we have to do
It's up to me and you
To make this special love
Last forever more

After five years, Cordelia Chase entered the Hyperion Hotel with style and beauty. It was as if she floated in through the doors with grace, wind blowing through her dark locks.

The people she used to work with immediately stopped what they were doing and stared in awe when they saw the glorious Queen C. Gunn's jaw dropped, and the battle axe he was polishing clattered to his feet. Fred stumbled on her feet from retrieving a book that was left on the couch, as Wesley dropped his white ceramic coffee mug, making the contents splash on the green tiled floor, and the mug crash into pieces.

"Cordelia," they all gasped. Then they all turned their heads towards the stairs when they heard another gasp.

Descending down the steps was a shirtless Angel in leather pants. He quickly stands in front of her, taking in her beauty. He stroked her cheek, and then suddenly dipped her back dramatically. He then gave her a passionate kiss. When they parted, Angel declared, "I love you Cordelia. Never leave again."

"Never again. I love you too much," she huskily replied.

(A/n: AHHH!! Don't take out the rotten fruit and hurl them at me yet. It gets better I promise)

*~*~

Cordelia was suddenly sitting in her parked jeep, gripping the wheel and staring nervously ahead. She hoped her welcome would turn out as good as that little fantasy was, but deep down, she got a feeling that it wasn't going to turn out as she planned.

She was parked in front of a place she hadn't been in for about five years; the Hyperion Hotel AKA Angel Investigations.

The former higher being hadn't been in contact with any of the AI team since they did that memory spell. The vision she had when she regained her memory scared her so much, she had to be far away. All the things that Angelus did combined with what the Beast was going to do was so horrible. She knew it wasn't the smartest nor the bravest thing she could've done, but the fear clouded her mind.

She left her only friends and family; she even left the man she loved/ when she fled, she left a note telling them she was leaving, warned them of the dangers that were ahead, and told them she loved them.

She had been alone for so long that she couldn't take it anymore. She needed her friends back, she wanted her family back... She wanted her Angel back.

Cordy wanted to tell her family how much she missed them; to see if they were okay. But the real reason that encouraged her to come back was Angel. She needed to tell him that she was still in love with him. It was a bit risk after all this time, but Cordy had faith.

She finally gathered up her Chase confidence that had been long harbored, clicked off the radio, and got out of the blue jeep.

Walking through the garden, memories filled her head. Long talks with co-workers, demons fought, vamps dusted. She asked Angel about their love right her on this pond.

Her eyebrows creased and she took a better look at the man-made pond. It was no longer moldy and cracked. It was re-tiled and cleaned. Tje water was crystal clear now, nit murky. The reflection of the setting sun, made it sparkle orange. In it were lily pads and swimming in it were colorful Chinese fish.

She looked all around her and she gasped in amazement. The garden was now managed and kept. The vines that were woven in the gates and walls had roses that were purple and blue. There were no weeds in sight were they would usually be wildly growing.

Climbing up the steps, she made her way to the glass doors and stepped into familiar surroundings.

The inside still looked the same as it did before she left. Files and papers were scattered on top of the counter, the settee, the couches, and chairs were still in the same place; so was the weapons cabinet. But there was still one thing different... Why were there baby gates on the stairs? Who had a kid?

"Cordelia?" a voice came.

She ripped her attention from the baby gates and looked at the person who called her and smiled.

"Hey Gunn." She met him half way in the lobby, giving him a big hug.

From behind, a shriek was heard and Cordelia was attacked with a bear hug by the skinny physicist.

When Fred let go of Cordelia, she saw a brighter looking Wesley behind her. He looked much happier than he did when he was the outcast several years back; another hug was passed on.

"Cordelia! You're back!" Fred exclaimed excitedly, "Are you gonna stay?"

Cordy nodded, "If you don't mind?"

"Welcome back," Wesley warmly said with a smile.

"So how are you guys? What's happened since I left?" Cordelia curiously struck up conversation.

Her three former co-workers exchanged looks and then looked back at Cordelia.

"Oh. A LOT's happened," Gunn answered.

"So tell me, I'm not going anywhere."

"Well..." Fred trailed off.

"What?" Cordelia darted her eyes between the three.

"Well for one, Gunn and I are engaged," Fred finally informed, hugging Gunn's side and he kissed the top of her head.

"Cordy gave a wide smile, "Oh really?! That's great!" After a moment she looked around and asked, "So where's Angel?"

Fred opened her mouth to answer, but was interrupted when said vampire came running in the lobby from one of the downstairs hallway. Ignoring the people in the lobby, he went behind the counter and hid.

"Angel," Wesley called. All they got in response was a "shh..." from behind the counter.

Cordelia's heart beat quickened at the sight of the men she hadn't seen in so long. He looked different but damn good. His style changed from dark, stylish wear and boots to dark blue jeans and a gray hoodie and sneakers. It was no leather pants and naked chest, but maybe she'd get lucky one day and he'll wear that outfit.

Wesley, Gunn, and Fred smirked, knowing what was going to happen, while Cordelia looked on with confusion.

A second later a toddler with light brown curly hair, parted into two pigtails and greenish-blue eyes came waddling in from the hallway Angel came from. She wore a little white sundress with little purple flowers printed on it.

The adorable baby giggled and asked the group, "Where go?" Wesley answered by squatting down on his haunches and urging her to come to him, telling her he would help her find him. The girl moved her tiny legs as fast as she could towards Wes.

When the baby, Cordy guessed she was about two, was half-way, she was intercepted by Angel. He popped up from his hiding place and ran toward the little girl. He scooped her up and did a turn, making her squeal and shriek with baby giggles. Them Angel started tickling her and gave her wild kisses all over her where he could reach.

He laughed and looked up. His laughter died down and his face melted into shock when he met the eyes of Cordelia.

"Oh my God." Angel breathed out, "Cordy?" He stared at the woman he hadn't seen in five years. She wore tight dark blue jeans and a pink mid-drift tank top. Her brunette hair was now cut shoulder length.

"Hi Angel," Cordy said.

"Wh-What are you doing here?" He shifted the squirming girl in his arms.

"I missed you guys. And I need to talk to you," Cordy looked him dead in the eye.

He slowly nodded, "Of course. We'll talk in the office." Angel moved to give the girl to Wesley when a tall figure jumped from the second floor and landed in front of Angel.

"Hi Dad." Connor greeted. He still looked the same. His brown hair was still the same length and his style consisted of long sleeve t-shirts and jeans.

"Connor, you know Mom hates when you do that," Angel scolded.

Cordelia mouthed, "Mom?"

"Sorry Dad," Connor smirked, "I just..." He trailed off looking at Cordelia awkwardly, "Hello Cordelia."

"Connor," she greeted. Connor was feeling uncomfortable, the last time he saw Cordelia, he kissed her and tried to pursue a relationship with her. Being turned down flat for you dad could do so much to a guy.

Uncomfortable silence filled the hotel until the toddler spotted the young man.

"Ooh... Tonnor," the little girl beamed, reaching out for him. He took the girl from his father's arms and kissed her chubby cheek.

"Hi Kiara," he said. The little girl just responded by trying to put her little fingers in Connor's mouth.

He walked off with her and went to the kitchen.

Angel looked toward Cordelia, "Shall we?" she nodded and they walked off to the office.

Angel closed the door behind them as Cordy sar in the seat in front of the desk.

"So..." Angel stuck his hands in his pockets and rocked on the balls of his feet; he stood by the door.

"So..." Cordy said back, "How've you been?"

"Great," he smiled.

"I can tell," she squinted at him a little, "Your style's changed. Is that... Is that a tan? Dad you get you Shanshu?"

Angel smiled and nodded happily.

"Wow! How? When?"

"Well. after you left, there was a big lava demon called the Beast that was hard to kill. It opened a hell portal and made it rain fire and blocked out the sun. That started the End of Days. After a long battle, the PTB summoned me and granted me my Shanshu. Still got the strength though, to help with the baddies that were left."

"Wow."

"Yeah. So what about you? What have you been up to?" He moved to sit on the edge of the desk, crossing his arms across his chest.

"Well, I've been in San Francisco, working at a restaurant as a hostess. Not much."

"Have you had any... you know... visions lately?"

Cordy looked at her hands in her lap.

"Just one, after the one before I left. They told me I'm no longer a half-demon. They don't need me anymore."

"Oh. Well," there was a moment of uncomfortable silence, "Why are you back?"

Cordelia got up from her seat and started pacing the room, wringing her hands nervously.

"For five years, I had time to think. About my feelings. I thought about what you asked me before I left. Well what I'm trying to say is," she paused in her pacing and faced Angel, "I still love you. I love you, Angel."

Angel uncrossed his arms and gripped the edge of the desk. He exhaled deeply and shook his head.

"Oh boy... So... you-you love me?" he stuttered. She nodded sheepishly.

There was silence as Angel thought about what Cordelia just told him.

"I-isn't this s'posed to be the part where you say that you love me, too?" Cordelia bit her lip nervously after she asked that.

Angel slowly looked up at her, "Oh God, Cordy... I-I don't... I can't."

"Oh...um I'm sorry. I'll leave," Cordy started to move out the door when Angel stopped her.

"Wait. Please. Let me explain." Angel gestured for her to sit back down, which after a moment and another "Please," she complied. She had unshed tears brimming her eyes.

Angel sat in the leather chair behind the desk and folded his hands on top of it.

"During the time you were still here, Lorne and Fred, they kept telling how you and me were meant to be. And I always know that wasn't true. But after hearing them saying it so much... I believed it. I was lonely. I didn't know if it was real or not. But when you left... I realized it wasn't. I'll never love you more than a sister Cordy. I love you... Just not that way... I can't."

Angel hated hurting her like this, but she had to know.

"So what changed your mind?" Cordelia sadly smiled, "Or is it who?"

"The Sunnydale crew came and helped us during the End of Days, and then we helped them with the First at Sunnydale. We obviously defeated them and closed the hellmouths for good. After I Shanshued, me and Buffy started talking... we got back together a month after, and she moved here with me to LA with me." He handed her the picture frame and Cordelia noticed for the first time the platinum band on his left ring finger, "A year later we got married."

Cordelia stared at the picture of Angel and Buffy. They were standing under a white painted arch with white lace and red flowers woven into it.

They were at a beach, the sun shining on them as a beaming Angel held a happy Buffy tightly to his chest. Angel wore a white silk shirt and khaki pants and Buffy had a simple white halter dress that flowed at her ankles. Her long blonde hair was down in waves, a red and purple flower was tucked on her right ear; she held a bouquet of the same flowers in her hands. Oh how Cordelia wished she in her place.

"She's the mom you were talking about with Connor," Cordelia observed.

"She is," Angel nodded, "The Powers said she was his real mother. He was made like Dawn. From her blood. Darla was just a surrogate." Buffy and him and Connor always found the reactions of clients hilarious when Buffy told them that the 22-year-old was her son, when she was just 26-years-old. They only told the clients that she was his mother, they understood the weird situations. To other people, they just said they were related and left it at that. They didn't want to explain why he had a mother that was about the same age as him.

"And the little girl, she's yours and Buffy's?" Smiling when the mention of his little girl, he nodded again.

"She's beautiful. What's her name?"

"Kiara Abigail Summers. She just two last month."

Cordelia looked at her fingers, "You seem happy." She looked back at his brown eyes.

He once again nodded and answered honestly, "I'm happy. But we still need you Cordy," he walked around the desk and kneeled in front of her, "I need you. Before the crazy ideas of kyerumption, you were like the little sister I lost. I want that back." Cordy nodded, silent tears falling down from her eyes. She embraced Angel, she had to admit, she too missed those days.

Angel wiped her tears away with his thumbs when he let go. He gave her a small smile.

"I got a question for you. Buffy went to Sunnydale for a vacation a week ago and she's coming back later with everybody, and we're all having dinner here. I was just wondering, do you want to join us? It'll be a 'Welcome Back' thing for you. What do you say?"

Cordy broke out in a genuine smile, "Well if it's for ME than pfft, why not?"

The two had a short laugh and he got up and opened the office door, gesturing for her to follow.

When they came back into the lobby, Wes, Fred, and Gunn were working on files, and Kiara was squealing, being chased by her big brother. She saw her father and charged for him.

Angel picked her up and shifted her so she faced Cordy.

"Kiara, baby, this is you Aunt Cordy. Daddy and Mommy's old friend." Kiara pierced her Buffy-looking eyes into Cordy's and gave her a big smile that looked like Angel's.

"Aunt Tordy," She reached for her and held onto Cordelia, leaving Angel's arms.

At that moment, the old Scoobies, minus Giles and Spike, walked in through the glass doors of the Hyperion.

Angel mumbled a hurried "S'cuse me" and ran to his beautiful wife who met him half way. Buffy jumped into his arms, wrapping hers around his neck and him about her waist. He swung her around in a full circle and captured her lips in a loving kiss.

Cordy watched the scene with understanding. She realized Angel would never be hers. He would always belong to the blonde slayer. She found herself quickly accepting that fact, she would rather have Angel as her big brother than not having him at all. She missed her chance.

Little Kiara was too busy playing peekaboo in Cordelia's brown hair to notice her mother that had returned and was now talking softly with Angel.

"So Cordy's back huh?" Buffy asked and played with her husband’s spikes.

"Mmmhmm," A smile played on Angel's lips, "Her main reason was to reclaim my love for her."

His beloved's jaw dropped, "You're kidding?" he shook his head and he saw the slight jealousy in her blue-green eyes, but it was quickly replaced with laughter.

"Well are you going to take her up on that offer?"

Angel feigned thoughtfulness for a moment, "Maybe. Unless, you know, a better offer came along."

Buffy played along and said, "I believe I have a higher bidding,"

"Mmm... and what's your offer?"

Before she could get a response out, a young male voice rang out, "Mom!"

Buffy left the embrace of Angel's to the one of her son.

"Hey Handsome."

She them felt little arms attack her legs. With a big smile, Buffy looked down and scooped up her baby girl.

"Hey my little Angel. Mommy missed you." After hugs and kisses were exchanged between mother and daughter, Buffy handed Kiara off to her aunts and uncles of Sunnydale, and then walked up to Cordelia with an unreadable face.

Cordy gulped in fear. She knew Angel told Buffy that she said she was in love with the ex-vampire, and truthfully, for the first time in her life, she feared the slayer.

Buffy just stood there staring at Cordelia. The whole hotel watched the scene playing out in front of them. To their surprise, and Cordelia's also, Buffy suddenly broke out in a bright smile and pulled her old rival into a hug. After, a moment of shock and hesitation, Cordelia returned the hug.

"Welcome home Cor," Buffy said after pulling away.

"Thank you."

"Cordelia!" Xander happily exclaimed, stepping up next to her with Kiara perched on his left arm, "Always a pleasure seeing you CC. We missed your beautiful mug." He hugged her shoulders with his free arm and smiled down at her.

"Hey Xander. You're style's slightly improved." Cordelia looked at his khaki dress pants and an emerald green sweater.

"Hey Cordelia," Willow greeted, "How've you been?"

"I'm better now."

"Cordelia," Oz nodded his head in greeting.

"Oz? I thought you were world traveler now."

The stoic man shrugged, "Got a little tired of it. Ran into Willow one day and decided to settle down."

Cordelia looked at the wicca confused, "You're not... But I thought..."

Willow blushed and shook her head, grabbing Oz's hand, "No more lesbian. I missed Oz." The two looked at each other adoringly.

"Oh. Wow." Cordelia was surprised when Dawn suddenly pulled her into a tight hug.

"Hi Dawn."

"We missed you Cordy," the young woman said.

"I missed you guys, too"

Cordelia was abruptly struck with shock when she finally noticed the brunette girl, nervously biting her lip.

"Faith? Wh-why aren't you rotting in jail?"

"Um... They broke me out for the End of Days," Faith paused and then said, "Look, Cordelia. I've changed. I'm sorry for what I did to you. I hope you forgive me."

Cordelia sighed, "It'll take some time to really trust you, but I think I'll learn."

Faith smiled and said "Welcome back."

"Thank you."

Later, the old group of friends sat in the middle of the lobby in a circle eating the take-out Chinese that Gun ordered for everybody.

Angel sat on the floor with his back against the setee with his wife sitting cross-legged in between his bent legs. He had his arms wrapped around her waist as she fed him and herself off the same plate. Their daughter that was a little ball of energy, was finally conked out upstairs, sleeping soundly in her room.

Dawn sat next to Buffy and Angel but actually sat on the rounded couch, attempting to use chopsticks.

Willow sat on the floor on the other side of Buffy and Angel, Oz sitting closely next to her, both of them sharing a plate.

Next to Oz sat Gunn, and Fred next to him, but on a chair she pulled up. On another chair was Cordelia, and then Xander on the floor. Wesley sitting next to him, expertly holding the chopsticks. Next to him was Faith, scarfing down her lomein. Connor completed the circle, he too like Dawn was also struggling with the wooden utensils.

The group happily talked as they ate, telling Cordelia stories of what happened while she was gone. She told them what she was up to which really took her about 10 seconds. The others told her that while in the big fight, they lost Anya and Spike. They also told her that their empathic demon friend, Lorne, took another stab at Vegas and was doing quite well for himself, and no one was using him to steal destinies or anthing. They were all planning visiting him next weekend. And how Giles still lived in London, and was currently dating a demonologist named Betty.

Cordelia looked around at the happy group. They were laughing and talking as if they had no care in the world, and they talked with her as if she never left.

For the first time in years, she felt whole. Even though she didn't exactly get what she actually wanted, she still got back her family, and it made her happy. It was better than feeling lonely, and no one wants to be alone. Cordelia, she was home.

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