Disclaimer: Willow and Buffy belong to Joss. Any other characters and events also belong to him and his crew. I possibly own the story and myself, but I'm not entirely sure. Don't sue, k?
Rating: R to be safe, but there's no actual sex or violence. Just more 'character development'. But honestly, have I ever written a story that wasn't PWP?
Spoilers: Surprise/Innocence, Graduation Day I+II
Season: Just after S3.
Teaser: Willow's feeling all bubbly after her night with Oz, so she shares with Buffy. Various girl secrets come out. Really throws S4 out, in my opinion. But then, who says S4 exists? Lol.
Author's note: For once I have a lot of people to dedicate to, but I can't decide whom! I know, this one can go to Shirlz, my bestest beta-reader in the whole wide web. Hi pet!
2nd Author's note: I wrote this in two evenings when my Internet connection was severed and I was bored. So be nice to me please.

"Hey Buffy!" Willow beamed as the door to Buffy's house was pulled open. Two sleepy eyes met Willow's, followed by dark shadows underneath and a small smile.

"Hey Will," Buffy replied, summoning up as much enthusiasm as possible. All she wanted to do was crawl into bed and forget about college, and vampires, and sewer talks, and rogue slayers. But Willow was determined to talk about whatever she had to talk about, and it was Buffy's duty as best friend to listen. The Slayer was less than happy. Grabbing a prepared tray of food from Joyce, the girls ran up the stairs and into Buffy's room. Willow's bag was quickly flung into a corner of the room and she plunked herself down on Buffy's bed, her face awash with positive emotions. Settling into the comforters herself, Buffy leaned back against the headboard and readied herself for a long night.

"Guess what?" Willow started. There was quiet for a moment as Buffy studied her best friend.

"You're different," she stated finally. Willow frowned, but in a good way.

"How'd you know? Do the others know? Does Xander know?" Buffy chuckled slightly.

"Calm down, Will. It's just a lucky guess. So he's not a suicidal maniac, huh?" she deadpanned. Willow grinned so much it hurt.

"I just had to talk to someone who'd been through something similar. I mean-"

"Could you possibly be any louder?" Buffy interrupted. Willow's blush grew even more.

"Sorry," she said in a hushed voice, "It's just…I needed to speak to someone who wouldn't laugh at me for being so totally amazed by it all." Buffy rested her hand lightly on Willow's for support.

"I know how amazing it is. And you and Oz can talk about it afterwards. And I'll always be here. And your mom won't find out through Oz, so you'll be fine. But I know what you're wanting to talk about."

"What am I wanting to talk about?" Willow asked in quiet awe. She hadn't realised how much her friend knew what she needed.

"You want to discuss the 'finer' details, right? Feelings, emotions, passion, and maybe size…" she trailed off when Willow went a deep shade of crimson. Buffy just grinned. "Right?" she pushed. The witch nodded shyly. Buffy returned the nod, withdrawing her hand. "Good. 'Cos then I'm your gal. So pick a subject." Willow leaned back into the pillows, obviously more relaxed, and opened her mouth to speak just when Joyce walked in.

"You girls all right?" she asked in her motherly way.

"We're good, mom," Buffy confirmed just as she leaned over the bed to get some ice cream. Joyce nodded and closed the door on them again. Buffy glanced at Willow who had completely lost her nerve, and she silently cursed her mom for walking in like that. "Just to let you know that I don't want enormous details and gross stuff, I have enough of that of my own. Just tell me what you were thinking when he kissed you." Willow nodded, grateful for the starting place.

"It was like…like…God, it was so great I can't even describe it. It was indescribable!" Buffy rolled her eyes and scooped up another spoonful.

"Was it like fire coursing through your veins or was it like ice sliding over your skin?" she asked, almost carelessly, but Willow could sense the connections behind the words.

"A bit of both, actually," she replied, "I mean it wasn't so hot that it burned, but it wasn't so cold that I shivered." Buffy nodded, but she didn't understand. But then, Willow and Oz weren't her and…him, so the feelings would be different. "And when we…y'know, climaxed? It was like a volcano erupting inside me; like the Hellmouth opening, but in a good way." Buffy frowned.

"In a good way?" Willow swiped her playfully on the arm, and Buffy smiled. Silence descended upon the room, but for Willow it buzzed. That had just…come out, and Buffy wasn't even phased. But she had one burning question to ask.

"What was it like for you when you climaxed with…" she trailed off. Buffy visibly stiffened, but she forced herself to speak.

"W…why?" she forced out. Willow shrugged nonchalantly.

"I just wondered. You can get my feelings so well, yet I have no idea what you felt." Buffy fought a mini battle within herself on whether to continue the subject. With a mental shrug, she put down the ice cream and faced Willow full on.

"First or second time?" she asked. Willow's jaw dropped.

"Twice? And we didn't meet bad-Angel again?" But Buffy was staring out of the window, fingering the twin holes on her neck fondly. "I'm still angry at him for doing that, y'know," Willow pointed out quietly. Buffy turned her head slowly.

"Why are you angry at him? Is everyone mad?" Willow nodded sagely. Buffy's brow knitted together. "But he didn't do anything," she argued. Willow pointed to the bite.

"Do you even realise that's there?" she asked in concern.

"Willow, the greatest instinct in a living creature, mortal or otherwise, is to survive. Angel was at his weakest. He wouldn't drink my blood willingly. In fact he got up and ran into the living room to get away. So I hit him until he vamped out, and then I forced his face to my neck." Willow was as white as a ghost, but Buffy had to get her point across. "Even though Angel didn't want to bite me, Angelus did. Not just to hopefully destroy me, but to keep himself alive. So his fangs slid into my neck…" Buffy's eyes slid closed as she remembered the painful yet pleasurable feelings. Her breathing became faster and her voice was hoarse when she continued. "And he gulped down my blood, and then my legs gave way and we fell. Falling, falling, like through bliss. I mean, it hurt. It hurt a lot. But he was on top of me again, and he was in me again and it was so…erotic. And I felt myself get colder, and my breathing was faster, and suddenly I was totally alive! Every nerve and cell in my body was screaming in happiness and pleasure and pain and I didn't want it to end." Slowly, Buffy opened her eyes and looked on Willow. "And I blacked out with Angel's weight on my body, his cool skin against me, and my blood rushing through his veins. I could almost hear it. And I wouldn't take back a moment of it unless he asked me to." Willow nodded fervently, steadily taking in all the strange emotions she'd registered on Buffy's face as she'd recounted the events. How could something so disgusting be so passionate? Willow didn't understand, but Buffy obviously did.

"I get that you liked it, but did Angel?" was her next question. She was enthralled beyond belief. Buffy nodded slowly.

"I felt him where I wanted him most, and I could feel the tension in his back. And his smell-" she breathed in deep to emphasise her point "-I can almost smell him now. You know the scent of sex, right?" Willow nodded, a little taken aback at Buffy's bluntness. "Well times that by ten and you have a smell totally Angel at that moment. But it was so cold." Buffy shivered unintentionally, and Willow could have sworn she went a paler shade.

"So what about the first time?" Willow asked, half to change the subject and half because she wanted to know. Buffy's smile lit up at the memory of her birthday.

"That was fire. It was so hot that night, and his skin…he cooled me down, but he was the fuel of my fire. That was just passion, pure and simple. An attempt to become one with each other, to hide from our responsibilities. He was so tender and gentle… Was Oz slow with you?" The question came out of the blue and caught Willow completely off guard.

"Huh? Oh! Yeah, he was really slow and gentle. And he sorta teased me a little. And that was strange cos I didn't think Oz was the teasing type. But half of me wanted him to speed up, and now I'm worried that that was wrong. Was it wrong? Should I have not wanted him to speed up?" Willow was in full worry-mode now. Buffy smiled at her uneasiness.

"Everyone is different, with their own tastes and fantasies. Next time you can ask him to go faster, harder, slower, whatever. Angel told me that, but not applied to this subject." The witch nodded, glad that she and Buffy were friends. What would she have done without her?

"So Angel was…nice," Willow said slyly.

"Why?" Buffy asked. It wasn't a harsh tone, but somewhere between worry and warning.

"It's just…I wondered. After your birthday, you always seemed more mature. Of course that could've been the crisis at the time, but I always thought only a hugely amazing or devastating thing could change you, and I could only think of that night." Buffy nodded slowly.

"Angel was more than nice. He was more than amazing. He was…Angel. How can you describe something that's beyond words? I mean, he taught me nearly everything that I've come to accept as reality. That's all totally changed now, but that's beside the point. I grew up quickly because of something amazing and devastating. It was the best night of my life when we slept together, but when I went to see him afterwards and he was…turned, he told me that I wasn't worth it and I had a lot to-to learn." Willow suddenly noticed the tears poring down Buffy's face, and the tiny sobs that shook her body. She moved in to comfort the Slayer, but Buffy would have none of it. Instead, she continued. "Afterwards, the pain he felt because of what he did was so clear in his eyes, I couldn't bring myself to talk to him about it."

"I'm sensing there's more to this story," Willow butted in with a friendly smile. Buffy gazed at her with watery eyes.

"Not really. Just that Faith and I never got on because of my fear that I wasn't good enough for Angel, that he'd want something better. He always totally denied it of course, but I still wondered. But he's not here anymore." Wiping her eyes and sniffing loudly, Buffy forced on a dazzling smile. "Anything else wolf-y you wanted to talk about?" Willow shook her head.

"No, that's it," she said with a small smile and a guilty look in her eye. "I'm sorry," she mumbled. Buffy patted her hand.

"I know you are. And so am I. So what's say we turn on TV and pig out on ice cream, yeah?" Buffy suggested. Willow grinned and snuggled in under the covers with Buffy.

"Thanks for having me over, Buffy. I feel better now," Willow said. Buffy just smiled and flipped on the TV set.

On the other side of the door, Joyce walked away with tears in her eyes and a heavy heart. Her little girl was all grown up.

I know, cheesy ending but all my stories finish lamely. And sorry to Jonathan who'll read this and think 'Does she ever listen to my advice?' Yes I do listen, Jonathan, but I happen to be very lazy and therefore wrote a small story again. *g*

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