Disclaimer: I own zip.
Distribution: (Hysterical laughter) Hem. If you want this you may have it.
Rating: PG-13 for safety I guess.
Summary: Two truth spells lead to a reunion.
Notes: This is a badfic. Very bad. Bad bad bad bad bad. This is sort of based on Tango's story "Primal Force" In a twisted way. The idea is that the same screw-ups happen as in the original badfic, only they happen to different people and instead of happening in S6/3 it's happening in S5/2.
Feedback: Comments? Questions? Complaints? scwlc@yahoo.ca

Wesley had just about finished casting his spell when he tripped. That wouldn't have mattered, but Wesley was carrying around some salamander eyes for the spell as he approached the circle. So, the ex- watcher tripped and dropped the jar of eyes all over the vampire, and simultaneously managed to push his friend inside of his casting circle.

"Wesley!" shouted Angel. Before either of them could express surprise at the man's clumsiness, a blue light rose from within the circle and slammed into Angel. Then it vanished into him, and left the two startled.

Angel looked at Wesley and said, "Not that I'm blaming either of you, but what the hell is this gonna do to me?"

Wesley replied, "I'm not entirely certain, but the casting was incomplete. So, I suppose as long as the whiskey isn't added, nothing should happen." Angel raised an eyebrow at the ex-watcher who responded defensively. "I was simply performing a sort of truth spell. It was supposed to make whoever was holding the crystal unable to speak anything but the truth." He tilted his head a little, considering. "Actually, to borrow a phrase, it was to make the person holding it speak `the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth.'"

Angel's expression returned to normal. "I assume this was for use in interrogations."

"Naturally," Wesley replied. Since the spell hadn't been finished and all he had to do was take apart the circle to prevent it from being finished he wasn't worried. "Well, I suppose we'd best clear this up before anything untoward happens," Wesley said. He picked up the final ingredient, cursed as the label slipped off the bottle of whiskey, juggled the bottle for a moment, and wound up spraying the vampire with the alcohol.

"Lord, Wesley!"Angel said to his friend. "For all that ye try an' pretend ye're the great man in charge ye canna take tha' clumsiness out o' ye! An' here ye're expectin' we'll simply follow yer orders when ya havena th'experience ta lead."

Suddenly he seemed to realise what he was saying, and shut his mouth with an audible snap. Wesley looked rather taken aback and stuttered, "Well . . . I . . ." he shook himself. "I'll find a way to fix this. Don't worry."

Angel just stood, mouth closed, and nodded.

***

Over in Sunnydale, the Scoobies were dodging lightning bolts fired off by an insane witch. Finally the team had her surrounded. Suddenly she cackled wildly and shouted, "Goddess of truth aid me!" She was surrounded by a fuschia light which then streaked over to Buffy and sank into the Slayer. "Truth in actions and all that's done! Started by lies and by greatest truth undone!" Following that bit of doggerel she vanished in a puff of smoke leaving a very confused ragtag band of heroes behind.

"Okay, what was that?" demanded Xander.

Giles, looking quite perplexed replied, "I believe she cast a spell on Buffy before she vanished. The only question is what the spell was intended to do."

Willow sat down and frowned as she reached for her laptop. "Well, she invoked a goddess of truth and then said that invocation about truth and lies, so we know it has something to do with truth. I just don't understand what she means by truth in actions."

"Or what that part about `started by lies and by greatest truth undone' means." Anya added. They all started for the books, and began to try to find anything on truth spells that would unravel the mystery. Buffy sighed and took her chosen tome off to one of the desks and sat down to read. Riley sat down next to her and gently pulled her onto his lap.

Or tried to. Buffy absently pushed Riley off, sending him to the floor with a thump. "Ow!" He gazed up at her, hurt. "What was that about?"

Buffy looked up and frowned a little. "I don't know. I just suddenly felt as though I had to get you off me." She was quite confused. Riley was her boyfriend. She had no reason to do that to him.

Riley wrapped his arms around her and started to speak. "Buffy I— whoah!" he said as he hurtled across the room. Xander and Anya rushed to his side and helped him stand. "What the heck was that?" he demanded.

Buffy suddenly stood, looking trapped. "I have no idea. I don't know why I did that. It was like my arms had a mind of their own all of a sudden."

Willow leapt to her feet. "That's it!" she said excitedly. "Somehow, this witch is distorting the truth!Riley is Buffy's boyfriend and she loves him, so she's trying to make her act the opposite way. Now all we have to do is get Buffy to act normal again, and that should break the spell!"

During Willow's little speech, Buffy had watched with first curiosity, then with a smile of understanding. When she finished, the Slayer walked over intending to pat her on the back for her brilliant deduction. Instead her hand had a life of its own as she reached out and swatted Willow sending her staggering a couple paces forward.

"You're welcome," the hacker said, while Giles nursed her near miss with a concussion.

Only Dawn and Spike seemed skeptical of this, but they said nothing. Instead they watched as, over the course of the next hour and a half, the Scoobies tried everything, including locking Buffy in a room with Riley. That just caused her to break down the door, scuttle down the hall and climb into the shower to scrub away her topmost layer of skin.

Dawn, in the meantime, packed a bag for Buffy and Spike moved Giles' shiny new car to the front door. He also parked his DeSoto right behind the car and settled in to wait. Moments later the Slayer came bolting out of the store, vaulted into the car and roared off. The others arrived moments later to find Spike behind the wheel of his car and Dawn in the front passenger's seat "Get in," she told them, "We might as well follow."

They all got in, and Spike started down the street in the opposite direction Buffy had gone. "Um, Spike, Buffy went that way," Xander said jerking his head behind them.

"I know," the vampire replied, "But it'll be easier to get onto the highway this way."

***

Angel spent most of the afternoon with his lips tightly closed lest he insult one of his friends. That was until Cordelia made a wisecrack about liking him better like this than brooding. "Oh of course. I am ta feel ashamed of all that I've done to ye whether or no' `twas done in your defence. I'm ta let Wesley be the one that runs Angel Investigation despite the fact that I'm the one as what pays for all o' yer clothes and luxuries. Those same luxuries ye made me make an investigations service to buy. Not that it matters since I'm to be depressed and makin' up for my sins at the same time I'm a cheerful bastard who lets nothin' get to him not even the return of the woman that had no small part in makin' who I am today."He was beginning to get more and more incensed as he spoke, overriding any and all objections. "Not that I'm allowed to have a bad day or ever slip because bein' the champion means that yer impervious to all emotional problems." His only pause was to take another breath (because to make vocal cords function the speaker needs to have air running over them). "And dinna get me started on Buffy. `Oh dinna ever mention Buffy! It'll make the poor thing too depressed to function."

The uncomfortable looks the others were exchanging just made him even angrier. "Oh thass right! No guilt from the lot o' ye! Yer just uncomfortable that I actually feel angry or hurt or confused or tired from time to time! No, Doyle's allowed ta be human, Cordelia, Gunn Wesley yer all so damned perfect compared ta me that when ye screw up `tisna your fault. . ."

All the fury and hurt of the past six years came spilling out of Angel's mouth, until he started to rant about Buffy's sins. Then he finally managed to put a cork in it. Cordelia was the first to speak in the profound silence that followed. "Well, I'm never going to believe you when you say you're fine ever again."

Gunn had been kept in the dark about so much of Angel's life that he'd had no notion of the trials the vampire had gone through. So, the man stepped forward. "Angel?" he asked hesitantly. The vampire turned to raise an inquiring brow at his friend. "Man, I . . . I didn't know," Gunn said.Angel nodded at him.

Cordelia just looked all hurt and upset, "I have been trying my best to get you to join the human race. Is it my fault that you can't seem to get it together enough?" Wesley and Gunn turned to stare at the seer.

Wesley hesitantly spoke, "Cordelia, don't you think it's a little beyond the call of necessity to force Angel to `join the human race'?"

Cordelia stared at him as though he was slightly mad. "Wesley, you said Angel needed to be connected to humanity more yourself!" she said.

The ex-watcher fixed her with a Look. "That does not mean that I felt as though we ought to push Angel into any activity as long it was unrelated to his so-called brooding." Angel smiled gratefully at Wesley. He would have liked to speak in his own defense, especially now that all his feelings of anger and inadequacy were being aired, but the verbal diarrhea that was coming out more rant than anything else didn't allow him to make any actual points, and it was really kinda tiring.

Gunn turned to Angel and said, "Man if it were me that she'd been sayin' stuff to I'd have whipped her ass. Do you want me to do it?" Angel just rolled his eyes in response.

Wesley shook himself and said, "What any of us wants is really quite unimportant. Right now we need to return Angel to his normal state." He sighed and turned away, pinching the bridge of his nose. "Let me go over this again. The spell was supposed to use that crystal to cause the person holding it to speak the truth. If they were made to hold the crystal and one asked them something they would be forced to respond solely truthfully, and would be unable to hold anything back."

"So, since the spell was cast directly on Angel he just says what he thinks is the truth about everything." Gunn said nodding. "Is there any way we could just remove the spell?"

Wesley shrugged. "I know that the effect of the crystal was supposed to weaken should one cease resisting it. Essentially that if you were voluntarily telling the truth you would be more able to control how much of the truth came out." The statement about control made the group send a look in Angel's direction. If he was so unable to control what he said, that indicated he was lying about something a great deal. "In any event," Wesley continued, "It was only supposed to work once. Once the person was answering questions, the spell would go away."

A sudden brainstorm hit him. "Perhaps if Angel were to speak nothing but the truth about the one thing he is normally least truthful about the spell will remove itself." Gunn and Wesley smiled at this while Cordelia continued to sulk, and turned to the vampire who looked positively terrified.

Gunn laid a hand on his shoulder and asked, "Angel man, what's wrong?"

His mouth opened as the irresistible compulsion overcame his wishes, "I dinna wish ta talk about Buffy!"

As everyone in the Hyperion erupted into a babble of voices, Spike burst in, followed by Dawn, Giles, Xander, Willow, Riley and Anya. "Why are we here G-man?" the Xander demanded, "Buffy isn't here."

"Not yet," Spike replied with unimpaired calm. "Hello Angel. Seem we're havin' a bit of a problem with a truth spell and Buffy."

"You too?" asked Cordelia.

Anya shrieked in irritation, "I don't care what's going on in this hellhole! I wanna know why Spike has dragged us out here! What the hell does LA have that Buffy would want?!" Several responses were on the tips of several people's tongues when Buffy burst through the door, flung herself across the room, and began to make out with Angel.

Riley turned many interesting shades of purple. "What the hell do you think you're doing?!" he shrieked to his girlfriend.

"Being completely truthful in action if not in word or belief," replied Dawn on behalf of her sister. At the looks of both the LA crew and the Scooby Gang she sighed and explained. "The spell cast on Buffy was `Truth in actions and all that's done, started by lies and by greatest truth undone.'" She grinned at the dumbfounded group. "Buffy's just being truthful in her actions. She doesn't love Riley, no matter what those two have convinced her, so she was helpless to avoid pushing him away. Since the one thing she wants the most, is reuniting with Angel, it's the most truthful thing she could do."

Angel's mouth had finally left Buffy's and she was feverishly kissing her way down his neck, so he was able to respond, "So how're ye gonna get us to stop? I mean, I love this, and I love her, and I want ta carry her away and make love to her until neither of us can stay awake, but I dinna want ta do it in front ye all."

Buffy's hands slipped under Angel's shirt and she was caressing the skin underneath when she spoke, "I thought you didn't love me anymore. You said-"

"Oh Buffy," he cupped her face in his hands, "I was tryin' ta give ye the life ye deserve. One where somethin' in it is outside o' the darkness. With a man tha' could make love to ye." He frowned at her. "And ye tol' me ye loved Riley.

He pushed her across the room, pinning her against the wall. "I lied Angel," her eyes filled with tears, "I'm so sorry." She stared deeply into his eyes. " I love you."

Angel looked lovingly into her eyes before kissing her. Then he said, "I love you too. If only my soul was permanent so we could be together-"

Dawn interrupted, "Actually it is." This caused Buffy to squeal happily and leap up, wrapping all four limbs around Angel. They started kissing again, ignoring Xander, Willow and Riley's incoherent cries of rage, Cordelia's plaintive denials and reaffirmations that Buffy was the worst thing on the face of the Earth for Angel, and the mutters of embarrassment coming from everyone else but Anya who was merely watching in avid interest.

There was a faint popping sound and a blue light appeared haloing Angel and a similar fuschia one around Buffy. The two glows then faded away, and Buffy and Angel pulled apart suddenly as the compulsions that had held them moments before faded with the lights. Buffy flushed and stepped away from Angel saying, "Umm. Well I guess I'll see you around."

Confronted with Riley's smirk and the hostility of Buffy's friends, Angel started to back away. At that Wesley shouted in irritation, "Damnit man! You've both just admitted you love each other and that there's nothing holding you apart! What's wrong with you!?"

Both Slayer and vampire paused, then by mutual unspoken agreement sprinted for the stairs. "Bye!"

"We'll be at the mansion!"

Riley returned to his previous purple hue, "Buffy is mine! She loves me! What does that vampire have that I don't?"

"He's gorgeous, sexy, smart, rich, strong and apparently really good in bed," said Dawn. "By the way Wes, Tara says you owe her big time for the spell."

Wesley grinned at his co-conspirators, "So I do. How did you pull your end off though?"

Spike grinned back, "Eh, I know a couple witches as owes me a favour."

"But . . . but . . . but . . ." Xander sputtered.

"You sound like an outboard motor Xander," Wesley said. "You can express your outrage at the triumph of true love later." He turned to the Slayer's sister and the bleached vampire, "Would you like to join me for some ice cream?"

"Woo-hoo!" was Dawn's reply and the threesome left the completely baffled teams of evil fighters staring confused at the doorway.

And Buffy and Angel lived happily ever after.

Author's Post fic note: No, Dawn and Wesley didn't get together, they were just working together.

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