Force of Nature

by S. J. Smith

DISCLAIMER: I own nothing of these characters. That's up to Joss Whedon, David Greenwalt, WB, Fox and anyone else I've forgotten.
TIME: Sometime before "Over the Rainbow."
SYNOPSIS: It's fluff. Go with it.
DISTRIBUTION: BA_Fluff list, Fanfiction.net. Let me know if you think you want it. I'm sure we can work something out.
FEEDBACK: Please. Thanks.
RATING: PG13 (maybe. If you can watch the shows, you can read this).


The doors to the Hyperion Hotel crashed open and a furious young woman strode inside. Gunn stopped whittling on his stake to stare at her in disbelief. A blonde, so tiny, so full of rage as to be beyond comprehension stood there, staring into the lobby. She stalked right up to Cordy's desk, putting both hands on it and leaning forward, so her hair swept off her shoulders and said, "Where is he?"

Cordelia, not one to be outshone in any situation, rose. "Oh no," she said, "you're not doing it again."

"I'll ask you one more time, Cordelia. Where. Is. He?"

Cordelia crossed her arms, staring back at this little hellcat. "He's not here." The 'so there' was more than just implied, the taunt practically dripped from the words. "Even if he was, what makes you think I'd let you see him?"

The door to the main office slid open and Wesley ran out. "What's all the ruckus-good lord." He skidded to a stop, staring at the blonde.

She rounded on him. "Wesley." She nodded once, as if tallying up the room. "Where's Angel? And don't tell me he's not here." She hooked a thumb at the now-seated Cordelia. "She already told me he isn't."

"I don't see what good it would do for you to see him, Buffy," Wesley said, his own voice firm.

"Good?" she nearly shouted. "Do you have any idea what he did?" She read the expressions on Cordelia's and Wesley's faces. "Of course not. He's still Cryptic Guy at heart." She reminded Gunn of a hunter, the way she glided up to Wesley, folding her arms across her chest to glare at the taller man. "I've never liked you, Wesley," she said. "But I've never actually lied to you either. You know I'm telling the truth when I say I need to see him."

"He's out," Cordelia said, coming around the corner of her desk, as if to protect Wes. "With Kate."

The blonde's reaction to that bit of a lie was interesting. She looked as if she'd been gut punched, her face suddenly going pale. Then something in her straightened and her face smoothed to that somewhat angry mask she'd worn since she'd walked through the doors. "Then I'll wait for him," she met Cordelia's eyes and it was like a clash of sword on sword, "until he gets back."

"Here?" Wesley asked, somewhat panicked.

"Here?" Cordelia asked, then, "No. You can't. Place of business, strictly against company rules. You'll have to wait somewhere else." She tried to hustle the blonde out of the lobby. "Sunnydale would be good-"

The blonde didn't even move. "I'm waiting here," she said, lowering her voice. Gunn had seen Cordy mad, Wesley mad, even Angel in a fine old rage. Still, he would lay odds against all three to back this honey.

"Fine." Cordelia lifted her hands and took a step back. It was out of her control. "Do whatever you want. You always do anyway, no matter who gets hurt." Cordelia went back behind the counter and settled in to her computer. Wesley, after an indecisive moment, followed suit, returning to his office and sliding the door shut behind him.

The little blonde still stood, like she wanted to explode on someone. Gunn decided for discretion and started working on his stake again, keeping a close eye on the powder keg in the middle of the lobby.

A little later, the door opened again and Angel walked through them, carrying bags and shouting, "Who's for Chinese take-out?" as he walked down the stairs. His grin slid off his face as he took in the sight of the little blonde standing stiffly in the center of the foyer. Her arms were crossed and she just seemed incendiary, even from the back. "Buffy," he said, as if he weren't at all surprised to see her there.

"Angel," she said, coolly.

"I tried to tell her you were busy, Angel," Cordelia said, not quite coming all the way around the counter.

Wesley appeared from his office, hovering, as if not sure whether to join the others or stay where he was, out of harm's way. He chose to enter the room, sidling up to Cordelia.

Angel dropped the bags on the counter, not taking his gaze off the blonde woman. "That's okay, Cordy," he said.

"Angel," Cordelia said, laying her hand on his, a gesture not at all lost on the blonde, who was tracking Angel like a predator did its prey. Gunn stood, slowly walking towards her. If she was gonna pull a fast one, he wanted to be able to help.

Angel did break eye contact at Cordy's touch, giving her a quick grin. "It's okay. Buffy and I...need to talk."

"I don't know who you are, but sneaking up on me usually gets you a stake in the heart," the blonde said, not even bothering to look over her shoulder.

Gunn froze, his eyes widening. He looked from her back to the trio standing at the counter.

"Gunn," Wesley said, quietly. "Come over here." He obeyed, joining his friends.

"That's not nice, Buffy," Cordelia said, angrily. "Gunn is a friend of mine. He's a friend of Angel's."

Angel patted Cordelia's hand with his free one and pulled away from her. He went to stand in front of the other woman, stopping a few feet away. Gunn never felt anything like it; the emotions ran from one to the other, like an electric current, almost humming audibly in its intensity. "I guess this isn't a social call," Angel said, quietly. He tilted his head. "Wanna take it somewhere private, so my friends don't have to listen to us yell at each other?" His voice sounded a little rough to Gunn, not quite angry, but maybe full of some other emotion.

The blonde met his eyes and nodded stiffly.

"There's a room at the top of the stairs." Angel gestured that she should lead. With an angry glare, the blonde took off. Angel hesitated. "Don't forget the food," he said, pointing at the bags.

"Angel?" Cordelia said, a load of feeling in his name.

"It's okay. I promise." Angel gave Cordy a crooked grin and followed the blonde up the stairs. There came the sound of a door closing and Cordelia wheeled to Wesley.

"This is so not good," she said. "Why didn't you stop them?"

"And how would you propose I do that?" Wesley asked, reaching past her to the bags. "Ah, kung pao chicken. Angel remembered."

"That might be the last thing he does!" Cordelia flung her hands in the air. "What if she stakes him? What if-"

"Buffy wouldn't stake Angel," Wesley said, opening another bag and peering inside.

"You don't know that!"

He stopped his search, lifting his eyebrows at Cordy. "Yes, I do. And so do you, if you think about it rather than letting your emotions run away with you."

"If anyone was letting emotions run away, I'd say it was them." Gunn hooked his thumb at the staircase. "Who was that, anyway?"

"Buffy, the current Vampire Slayer," Wesley said. He made a grimace. "Well, one of them, at least."

"Angel's ex." Cordelia folded her arms, leaning against the counter.

"That's Angel's ex?" Gunn let out a low whistle. "Man, what does he do to get all the hotties?"

"Hey!" Cordelia smacked him on the arm.

"What?" Gunn asked, rubbing his shoulder.

"I suppose that explains why Angel took off, a week ago," Wesley said, glancing at the stairs. "Buffy must have needed him."

"She's pretty mad, Wes," Gunn said. "Are you sure she wouldn't, you know?" He mimed staking a vampire.

"Buffy? No. Faith, perhaps." Wesley poked in the final sack. "Bother. Angel forgot the utensils again."

* * *

"Would you like to sit?" Angel asked as he closed the door behind him.

Buffy shook her head, folding her arms, her jaw set stubbornly. Her eyes blazed at him. "What gives, Angel? You come into town one night, for my mother's funeral. We both decided it was best you leave and you were gone. At least, that's what I thought until Tara got her mind back."

At Angel's uncomprehending look, Buffy said, "Tara. Willow's girlfriend. She's a witch, too. Glory sucked her brain but she could still see. And she said one of the things she saw was a vampire, not Spike, might I add, fighting Glory while we were trying to keep Dawn safe."

Angel waited patiently for her words to run out. "You're right. Tara's right. I did go after Glory."

"That's my job," Buffy said, stomping her foot like a child. "I'm supposed to protect Sunnydale!"

Angel spread his hands. "You were a little distracted, Buffy. More than a little. Didn't we have this discussion before, where you didn't mind me coming to help, if your life was in danger? What do you want me to say? Cordelia had a vision. I acted on it. Would you rather have the threat of Glory hanging over your head? Hunting for Dawn? Screwing up other people's lives? I did what I had to do." He shook his head. "The guy, what was his name? Ben? He understood."

Buffy startled at the sound of the name. "What about Ben?" she asked, warily.

She didn't know. Angel sighed, wondering how to explain. "He was Glory's point of contact in this world." He didn't want to put this pain on her, on top of all the other pain she'd gone through so recently, but she had to know. "I'm sorry, Buffy," Angel said, wanting to comfort her and knowing she'd probably reject him at this moment. "Ben understood that I had to...you know...so Glory couldn't enter this dimension any more."

"Ben's dead?" Buffy whispered, all the fight knocked out of her with those two words. The blow took her strength to stand and she half-tumbled into the chair Angel had offered earlier.

"I'm sorry, Buffy," Angel said again, watching as she tried to fit this new bit of information into the puzzle her life had become these last few months. She pressed a hand to her mouth, her eyes wide and unseeing, staring at the floor. Angel wanted to go to her but stood his ground. He'd done it again, killed someone Buffy considered a friend. It didn't really matter it was the only way to keep Glory from Dawn.

"You killed Ben?" Buffy finally asked, her voice small.

He hated that, the sound of defeat coming from her. "Yes. Because there was no other way," he said, speaking slowly and clearly, "and because I couldn't let you go through that anguish."

That brought her head up, her eyes meeting his. They seemed to plumb his depths, searching, for what? The truth of his words? The belief that there had been another way to solve the problem that was Glory?

Buffy spoke first, turning her head away. "So," she said, looking at her hands, her fingers twining her lap. "I guess that's it, then. You stopped a possible apocalypse." She glanced up at him, then away. Her mouth twitched. "Again."

"It didn't end the way I wanted it to, Buffy," Angel said, wondering if he pled with her not to hate him for his actions, or for not letting her in on it.

"I know." Her voice was soft, again.

"Um, well, good." He wasn't sure what to say. Her grief tugged at him like a magnet and all he wanted to do was take her in his arms and hold her forever. Instead, he tucked his hands into his pockets. "So, you know, do you want some Chinese food? I got enough for everyone. And more, since I don't really eat."

A tentative smile flickered on her lips. "No," she said, getting to her feet, not quite looking at him. "I guess I should go."

He stepped aside to let her move past him, towards the door. Buffy tucked her head, Angel could see the sorrow in her, in her movements, in her expression, even half-hidden by her hair. She was the glorious one, not that crazy god, and he couldn't even tell her how he felt. "Well," he said, stumbling over the words, "I guess we should say goodbye-"

Buffy opened the door and a bright light streamed through. Both she and Angel flung up their hands to protect their sight, screwing up their eyes to try to look into that brilliance. Angel moved up to guard her, ready to face this unknown threat for her, if she'd let him.

A voice chimed from that light, echoing in their heads. "You have fought well. We commend you."

A second voice joined the first, deeper, like bells in a church. "You shall have what your hearts' desire."

The first voice came back, a little miffed. "They earned it. You must tell them they earned it," it scolded.

The deeper voice sighed, like a breath of wind ruffling their clothes and hair. "You earned it. There. Are you happy?"

"Yes." The chiming voice sounded smugly pleased, reminding Angel of Cordy when she got her way.

"Earned what?" Buffy asked, tears streaming from her eyes from the light.

"She doesn't know?" the bell voice was aghast.

"She's lost her faith," the chime voice said, pityingly. "They took her memories and with them her dreams."

The light, if anything, seemed to get brighter. Angel blinked through his tears, a faint measure of hope kindling. It felt as if he pushed against some unknown force, battling to stay upright. Buffy stood alongside him and that was what mattered. He looped an arm around her back, adding his strength to hers. She leaned into him then, her face, emblazoned with light, not quite frightened, not quite understanding.

"She's not lost her faith," Angel said, "just put it aside." He dragged his eyes away from her, staring up into the radiance before them.

"Excellent answer," the chiming voice said, pleased.

"And you?" the bell voice said. "What of you, vampire?"

Angel closed his eyes, taking in an unnecessary breath. "I always hoped," he said.

"Good enough," the bell voice said, sounding extremely bored. "By the powers vested within me, yadda, yadda, oh, just be happy."

"Yes!" the chiming voice said and something struck them both, so that they were forced to cling to each other to keep from falling. Buffy's hair whipped around, the strands striking Angel's face as he tried to shelter her with his body. She pressed into him, holding on tightly. They were driven to the floor by what felt like a gale force, clutching each other.

"Angel!" He could barely hear her voice above the wind.

"Buffy?" She felt him say her name rather than hear it.

Then suddenly, all was quiet. No light blinded them, but the afterimage of the brilliance kept them from moving. Buffy nestled in Angel's arms. One of his hands cupped her head, holding it protectively against his chest. She tightened her grip on him, trying to blot out when she'd have to leave this heaven again.

She felt so warm against him; Angel didn't want to let her go. It had made him ache to leave her last time, when she needed him. When she hurt so much, with Joyce's death and her fear for Dawn. He felt healed, with her in his arms. Whole. He felt-

Buffy's head rose from beneath his chin. "Angel," she whispered, blinking the last of the afterimages away. Her eyes were enormous as she laid her hand against his chest. "Angel, your-your heart. It's," she leaned her ear against him, "beating, Angel, it's beating!" She pulled back, staring at him. "Your heart...."

He took a breath he hadn't realized he was holding, releasing it, wondering at the feeling of his lungs working again. "Buffy," he said, as she put her hands on his face.

"Your skin is warm," she said, tears rising in her eyes.

Angel covered her hands with his. "They said we earned it," he said. He touched his forehead to hers. He reveled in the feeling of her in his arms, her familiar scent rising from her body.

"I can hear your heart beating," Buffy said, pressing her face against his chest again, squeezing him tightly. Her words echoed in his memory and he gently pushed her away, looking at her, trying to memorize this feeling, this moment, against what would have to be. "What?" Buffy asked, confused.

"It might not last, Buffy," Angel said. "I've had experiences like this before. It didn't last. And I don't know if I can go through that pain again."

Frowning, Buffy grasped his shoulders, squeezing them. She got to her feet, combing her hair off her face. Turning towards the door, she squared up, as if she were going to fight. "Excuse me? Voices? My boyfriend needs some answers. And so do I. In fact, I demand answers."

Angel scrambled to his feet, not quite touching her. "Buffy, that's not how you do it," he said.

"Maybe not," she said, jutting her chin stubbornly, "but I'm getting results."

The bright light came back, gleaming on them. The bell voice spoke, sounding irritated. "What questions?"

"Go on," Buffy said, nudging Angel.

"Um," he said, not wanting to even hint to Buffy about the day that never was, "I was given life once before. It turned out badly. It nearly lost you two warriors."

"Yes, yes, the temporal fold," the bell voice said impatiently.

"Exactly," Angel said. He glanced at Buffy, who watched him intently. "I, uh, just want to know, if the loss of the warriors is factored into this?"

"You earned your humanity," the chime voice said. "You earned your happiness. What will be will be. Do not try to return this gift. It is only offered once."

"We'll take it, thanks!" Buffy said, clapping a hand over Angel's mouth before he could say anything else.

"I thought you demanded answers, Slayer," the bell voice said.

"I think you answered them."

"Very well. Go. Live your lives." The light faded abruptly, leaving them alone in the room again.

Buffy removed her hand from Angel's mouth. "Sorry," she said. "I was afraid."

"Of what?" Angel asked.

She shrugged, a little self-conscious. "I had this dream, that you were made human and you gave it up." She ducked her head. "For me. I didn't want you to try that in real life." She peeped up at him, not lifting her head. "You wouldn't, would you? Give up your humanity?" Her hands slid down his shirtsleeves, her fingers caught the cuffs.

He weighed the loneliness they'd both felt and the pain they'd both gone through and shook his head slowly. Reaching out, Angel tilted her chin up. "No. I'd never do that."

Buffy's eyes widened and a sweet smile flickered on her face like a candle, catching fire. She flung herself into his arms, pulling his head down to kiss him. "Angel I've missed you so much," she said. "So much."

"I know, Buffy, I've missed you, too. I love you. I've always loved you. And I'll never leave you again." He kissed her again, his heart beating harder in his chest.

* * *

"They've been up there a while," Gunn said, poking at the remainder of his lo mein.

"That's the way it is," Cordy said. "First they talk it out, then they fight it out." She frowned, shaking her head. "Wow. Déjà vu."

"What?" Wesley asked.

"It just felt like I'd said that before," Cordy said. She massaged her temples.

"It wasn't a vision, was it? Perhaps you should sit down," Wesley said, taking hold of her arm.

"No, no, I'm okay," Cordelia said, making a face. "It was just weird." Her eyes widened and she said, in another type of voice entirely, "And speaking of weird."

Wesley and Gunn turned to see Angel and Buffy walking down the stairs, their arms around each other's waists. Gunn was sure he'd never seen Angel smile that broadly. The little blonde practically glowed. Whatever happened upstairs, it sure didn't seem to be what Cordy expected.

"Oh, my god. You didn't, did you. You did. You've lost your soul again," Cordelia said, diving for her desk and rummaging in one of the drawers. She pulled out a cross, holding it up in front of herself. "Just stake him, Buffy."

The pair stopped, grinning goofily at her. "No need, Cordelia," Buffy said. She leaned against Angel, turning her face up to his, like a flower follows the sun.

"You're not," Cordelia said, her lip curling up. "Angel, no. You have better sense than this."

He shrugged. "Nope. I wasted my time, moping around here. You always told me to go out and live, Cordy." He disengaged from the little blonde and went to Cordelia, opening his arms to her. She eyed him in horror, shoving the cross at him. Angel smiled and closed his hand around it, taking it from her.

"You-you," Wesley stuttered.

"Angel," Cordelia said, stunned.

"Man, what kind of magic is this?" Gunn asked.

The blonde just beamed. "He's human, Cordelia."

"Human?" Cordy repeated, looking from Angel to Buffy and back again. "You're human?" For an answer, he took her hand and pressed it against his chest. Cordelia's mouth dropped open. "You've got a heartbeat!" She pressed her ear against his chest and lifted it, waving at both Gunn and Wesley. "He's got a heartbeat!" She jumped up and down. "Angel, you're human!" Laughing, she flung her arms around him and hugged him.

Wesley and Gunn moved in to test this out, Wesley by pulling Angel's hand from around Cordy and pressing his fingers on the man's pulse. "Listen!" Cordy said, dragging Gunn close.

"You know, I like you, man, but I'm not gonna put my head on your chest," Gunn said. "I'll take their words for it."

Joy dawned over Wesley's thin face. "I'll be damned. You have a pulse."

"I even breathe," Angel said, expanding his lungs in example.

"Congratulations, Angel," Wesley said, shaking Angel's hand. "I am truly happy for you." He turned to Buffy, smiling broadly at her. "And you as well, Buffy. Words cannot express."

She smiled at Wesley. "No, they can't." She joined Angel, who slid an arm around her. "Food," she reminded.

"Food," he said, smiling down at her. "And then, mint chocolate chip cookie dough ice cream."

Buffy nodded. "My favorite."

"I remember." They kissed.

"Ew," Cordelia said. "There's only so much of that I can take and I've exceeded my limit for cuddly couples today." She made a shooing motion. "Go."

"We're going," Buffy said, slipping away from Angel and tugging gently on his hand. They ran up the stairs and pushed open the door. Buffy stepped out into the night, smiling. Angel turned partly away from her, waving at the others.

"Don't wait up," he said, and disappeared through the door with his lady, out into the night, out into the world.

Out into life.

The End

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