Buffy sighed, shoving her hands deeply into her pockets as she walked through the cemetery. To her right, lots of dead people. Well, by now they would have turned to dust... On the left, more dead people...dust, whatever. Plus one person who *should* be dead...
Riley grinned as he continued. "So Ma had to call the rescue squad, because Randy was trapped underneath the new tractor. We had to herd all the cows from that pasture into the other so none of them would break free...let me tell you, that was work," he said as he slipped his arm around Buffy's shoulders.
Why, oh why had she let him come patrolling with her?
"Yeah, moving cows is so hard and all, what with them being so full of milk..." Buffy said, babbling. She had no idea where that one came from.
"You should try milking cows, Buffy, I'm sure you'd be awesome at it," Riley said with a wink. She glowered at him and bit back a giggle.
"Yeah, like you'd know..." she muttered.
"It's an art form, there are even contests held for it!" Riley said as they stepped off the path onto the grass. "It takes a lot of skill and patience..."
"Riley, it's *cow milking*! It's really not hard," Buffy cried, throwing her arms up and turning to him. "I tried it once when I was little and we took a field trip to this farm outside of L.A...and I can't believe I just told you that." She shook her head slightly and sighed, rubbing her temples and stopping. Riley reached a hand up to cup her cheek.
"It shows a great deal of trust, Buffy," he said gravely. "You must really feel something for me to tell me your deepest, darkest secrets."
"Yeah, and it's called nausea," she mumbled. Right, she'd ALMOST share her deepest darkest secrets with Fish Boy. When she milked another cow...
"I think you should come home with me over spring break," Riley said suddenly, bringing his other hand up to frame her face. He leaned down to whisper, "I'd really like my parents to meet you."
Buffy smiled despite herself, that was so sweet of him. She hadn't thought they were at that stage in their relationship--she KNEW they weren't--but it was a sweet gesture nonetheless. He leaned his head down to kiss her softly on the lips and she responded, pushing up against him as the kiss deepened.
Suddenly she pulled away, gagging and spitting to rid herself of the hair that had gotten in her mouth. Riley wiped the stray pieces back sheepishly and grinned at her.
"It's better than hair gel!" he laughed. Buffy glowered at him and wiped her mouth with the back of her hand. Why was she dating him again?
"Riley, when was the last time you got a haircut?" she asked, her voice barely polite as they continued on their patrol. He laughed again.
"My Ma cuts it for me, she's the only one who ever has. I'm waiting until I go back for break," he told her as he entwined his hand with hers. She shook him off, the suddenly image of Riley shoveling manure filling her mind. Curse mental pictures...
"Oh, isn't that so old-fashioned of you," she said through clenched teeth. They walked in silence for about a minute, Riley seemed to have a thing against it...
"So I've told you about my parents, Rita and Ralph, and my brothers, Randy, Ray, Rod, Robert, and Rusty. And my sisters, right? There's Rhonda, Roberta--"
"Roberta? Don't you have a brother named Robert, too?" Buffy asked, her brow crinkled.
"Yeah, they're twins," Riley replied. He began silently ticking off something on his fingers and Buffy's eyes widened as she saw the number of fingers he raised. "And we can't forget Rachel and Ronnie and..."
"My God, your parents sure were busy, weren't they? And what's with all the 'R' names?" Buffy shuddered, thinking of all the people who had the same genes as Riley... She could only pray that none of them would procreate.
"I like a big family," he said. "Someday we'll have one."
Buffy stared up at him in shock and horror. She'd rather marry Spike than have any of his children... Riley mistook her look and smiled at her.
"Yep, and we'll live on a big farm in Iowa and you can be a cute little housewife who always wears an apron and has food on the table when I come in from a hard day of work..." Riley trailed off, a goofy grin on his face. Buffy was reminded of 'Beauty and the Beast,' where Gaston was telling Belle of all the things she would do when they got married...
Well, that Belle hadn't taken his chauvinistic crap, and neither would this one. With a calming breath, Buffy looked up at Riley with a serious look on her face.
"Riley, we need to talk."
"About? Are you gonna tell me about that cow you milked? How old was she? What breed? Was her milk any good? Was--"
"No! I'm NOT going to talk about cows, Riley!" Buffy screamed. "I *hate* cows! We need to talk about us."
Riley was still clueless. Buffy was going to kill Willow for ever talking her into going out with him... "What about us?"
"I think we should break up," Buffy said. Riley stared at her in shock.
"Break up? Why?"
'Because you like cows' came to mind, but Buffy curbed the impulse to say it. She had to be kind of nice about this, he was obviously very fragile... "It's just not working," she said with a shrug.
"It's that other guy, isn't it? That Angel you always talk about with Willow," Riley said, his tone venomous. Buffy raised an eyebrow at him.
"What do you know about Angel"
"He broke your heart and skipped town. Boo hoo, poor you," Riley said bitterly. "That's nothing compared to the pain I feel! My pet cow, Betsy, died when I couldn't save her! Do you have any idea how that feels?"
"You know what? I don't care about your cow. It was a *cow*, Riley! Get over it! Do you know what it's like to love someone so much that you'll do anything for them? Do you know what it's like to be so much a part of someone that you don't know where you end and they begin? Do you know what it's like to love someone enough to die for them?!" Buffy cried, echoing the words she had never heard Angel speak but knew he had. He knew what it was like, because he felt the same for her...
"Oh please," Riley retorted. "You're too young to have felt any of that. It was just some sick form of puppy love."
Buffy clenched and unclenched her hands at her sides, desperately trying not to go Slayer on Riley...although he deserved it...
"You have no idea what you're talking about. Stick to the farm talk, Riley, at least then you sound somewhat intelligent," she said. "For a hick, anyway."
"Who are you calling a hick?!" he cried, taking a threatening step in her direction. Buffy laughed in his face.
"You think you can take me, G.I. Joe Boy?" she taunted. He stared down at her hard, a small gleam of fear in his eyes. Buffy pretended to get ready to strike, and Riley jumped back in fright. She laughed again. "Ooh, aren't we manly." "I want to break up!" Riley cried.
"Where have you been?!" she retorted. "I already said that! Can you at least *try* and stay with me here?"
"You don't have to get all defensive just because I brought up your ex. He was right in leaving you, you're obviously not stable and mature enough for a real relationship," Riley said, brushing his hair back from his eyes and starting to leave. "We are over."
"Oh, let me just go cry over that one," Buffy cried, furious at him. How dare some annoying, ugly, boring, G. I. Joe wannabe from Iowa tell her she wasn't mature enough for a relationship? Without thinking, she pulled a stake from her pocket and stalked after him, grabbing his arm hard enough to bruise and spinning him around. She got right into his face as she spoke with a deadly tone.
"You know, I thought you were different from other guys. I thought you were just what I needed to get on with my life. But I realize now--thanks to you--that I don't need to get on with my life. I need to deal with my past and go find my demonic ex-honey and set the record straight with him," Buffy said, a smile gracing her lips as memories of Angel smoochies rose in her mind. Pushing the sharp piece of wood into Riley's chest, she grinned up at him.
"And maybe get in touch with my own inner demons," she said, gently twisting the stake into his chest. "I'm sure it'll help me understand Angel better.
"So, thanks, Riley, for showing me what I needed to see. I'll write home to Ma and Pa Finn and let them know what became of their favorite little cowpoke. This won't hurt...much." Buffy smirked, the smirk turning into an all-out grin of evil as she shoved the stake into Riley's heart, piercing his skin easily.
Riley staggered back from her, his hands moving to clutch the wound on his chest. He looked up at Buffy in disbelief as a trickle of blood escaped his mouth, running slowly down to cling at the bottom of his chin. He gasped in pain, his eyes squeezing shut as he drew a raged breath in and fell to his knees, the dew on the grass wetting his pant legs.
Buffy stood above him, smirking broadly as he bled to death. He tried to speak but began coughing up blood, spitting the red liquid out and grimacing at the taste.
"Huh. When we killed the Mayor's guy, he didn't cough. Ah, well, I guess everyone's different," she said, shrugging her shoulders. Riley tipped over, his upper body hitting the ground with a jarring thump. The stake that was logged firmly in his chest was driven all the way through his body, breaking the skin in his back and tenting his shirt. Buffy sighed and turned away.
"I know I'll look back on this and be sad," she said with a small smile. "But then again, maybe that's too much to hope for."
"Having fun?" a deep voice asked from the shadows. Buffy turned quickly to the source, her heart skipping a beat. Angel...
"I try," she replied simply. Angel stepped out of the shadows and began slowly walking towards her, and Buffy unconsciously straightened up, gazing up at her lover smartly. "You know, making your own fun can be tough, but I manage."
"I saw. Mistake him for a vampire?" Angel asked, his face turned up in a devilish grin. Buffy smiled back at him triumphantly.
"Nah, I knew he was human. Besides, he deserved it," she said as she turned and started to walk slowly, hoping he would follow her. He always seemed to...
"He deserved to have a sharp piece of wood shoved through his beating heart?" Angel asked, strolling alongside her through the dark cemetery with his hands shoved deep in his duster pockets. He looked so good, almost at peace with himself. Buffy quickly looked away when he glanced over at her, blushing slightly and pushing a piece of hair back behind her ear.
"Well, when you put it that way...yeah, he *so* did." Angel chuckled. "So...what brings you to the 'dale?" she asked after a few moments of silence. Angel sighed.
"I'm not gonna lie to you, Buffy. I came to see you," he told her, stopping in the path. She followed suit, turning to him and gazing up at him with her big hazel eyes.
"Really?" she asked, trying not to let her hope filter into her voice. "No demons or prophecies or tips on how to deal with Cordelia needed?"
"Nope," Angel said, his lips tugging upward in a smile. "I just...needed to see you."
Buffy smiled, her soul warm at the revelation. "I'm glad you came," she said, meaning it completely. She hadn't seen him in a long time, since that day right after Thanksgiving...
"So am I," he whispered, staring deeply into her eyes. Buffy suddenly looked away, unsure of what was going on. Her gaze caught a speck of red on Angel's cheek and she brought a hand up to his face to rub it off. The substance was sticky and still kind of warm and Buffy immediately recognized it.
"Angel?" she asked in a scared voice. "What's going on?"
"That?" Angel replied, gesturing to her hand. He reached up to wipe the rest of it off. "I had my own problems with annoying people."
"Really..." Buffy said, cocking an eyebrow. "What kind of problems?"
"Some people just don't understand the meaning of the word no. Which is weird, because there are only two letters and all. But I took care of it," he said softly.
"What'd you do? Eat it?" Buffy joked. Angel's straight face made the smile slip from her face. "What, are you all evil or something now?"
"Nope. One hundred percent ensouled."
"Well, that's good to hear," she said awkwardly. Looking down at her hands for a moment to try and figure out how to make with the small talk, she was surprised to see Angel's hands reach out and gently take hers. She quickly reverted her gaze to him, uncertain of what was happening. Everything was so strange tonight...
"Look, maybe I'm not being *totally* honest. God, this is hard... I had this rehearsed in my head and--"
"Angel, sweetie, please don't go all Riley on me," she said with a shudder.
"'Go all Riley on you'?" Angel repeated.
"The guy who's becoming worm food? He told me once he rehearsed our conversations, which is just really, really freaky," Buffy replied.
"Okay...I didn't rehearse anything. I'm totally just going with the flow here...and..." Angel trailed off.
"What is it you're trying to say, Angel?" Buffy asked. He sighed again.
"I miss you. More than I can bear. And I realized that I need you...and that I love you more than anything in this world. I think we've spent enough time apart," he said, leaning down close to her.
"Yeah," she agreed softly. "We've both grown...have you grown? 'Cause I feel *so* much...older...wiser...or a better person or whatever." Angel nodded. "And these months without you...I don't know how I survived."
"Are you saying what I hope you're saying?" Angel whispered, his lips a hairsbreadth from hers.
"You're hoping I'm babbling incessantly?" she giggled. Angel responded by capturing her lips with his, wrapping his arms around her body and pulling her to him. She stepped closer to him eagerly, her arms slipping around his neck as they kissed. It felt so right, and perfect...and the whole world, their past, their pain, melted away and there was just the two of them once more.
Buffy was suddenly struck by a memory she never knew she had...of Angel in bed with her, laughing and eating and making love. She pulled away and stared at him long and hard, unexpected tears springing to her eyes.
"What's wrong, Buffy?" he asked with a worried face. She opened her mouth but no sound came out. She remembered...everything...
"We need to talk," she choked out. Angel nodded hesitantly. She quickly wiped the tears from her eyes and sniffled.
"About?"
"Cookie dough fudge mint chip," she said softly. Angel's eyes nearly bulged out of his head. It wasn't possible...
"You remember?"
"Didn't I promise I wouldn't forget?" she replied with a soft smile, her hand tracing the curve of his cheek. "Let's go back to my dorm...and talk--I have some chocolate and there is a jar of peanut butter in the fridge--and you can tell me all about this woman who tried to touch *my* husband. A name would be a great place to start..."
"Kate," Angel said, interlocking his fingers with hers. She leaned heavily on his shoulder as they walked out of the cemetery and closed the darkest chapters their lives would ever see.
And in the cemetery, Riley rotted.
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
I know, I know, it was...strange. Comments? Praise?? Death threats?? Chocolate??